


Sesshomaru and Avalon

by Elohiniar, Nightbird755



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Adventure & Romance, Angst, Angst and Drama, Canon Compliant, Eventual Smut, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Lemon, Minor Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha, Miscarriage, Oral Sex, Pre-Canon, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-10
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:28:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 31
Words: 183,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23087029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elohiniar/pseuds/Elohiniar, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightbird755/pseuds/Nightbird755
Summary: Avalon is a normal 25-year old woman and avid lover of Inuyasha. One day she is sitting in front of her TV when a magic portal opens throwing her into the show. She's violated by passing samurais and rescued by Sesshomaru. Can she survive in the sengoku? Will her knowledge of the show help Sesshomaru gain Bakusaiga sooner?Things aren't always what they seem.
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha, Miroku/Sango (InuYasha), Sesshoumaru (InuYasha)/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 289
Kudos: 107





	1. Sucked into Sengoku

Chapter 1: Sucked into Sengoku

WARNING THIS IS NOT FOR CHILDREN ADULTS ONLY

Story contains Rape, Violence, and Foul language.

This chapter details rape if you wish to skip over it avoid story between the XXX's

I don't own Inuyasha.

"AHHH GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!" The woman screams as she is being chased by five men dressed in old Japanese clothing.

The woman thought back to just about 20 minutes ago when she was home on her couch. She had decided that she wanted to watch her favorite anime, "Inuyasha" again. It had been awhile and she had a craving to watch it. She put on her grey shorts and her lavender shirt. The shirt was long and reached down to just below her thighs. She dug out her old DVD's, placed the first disc in the player and sat back to watch. The music boomed with the opening credits

I want to change the world,

Jounetsu tayasazu ni, takanaru mirai e

Te wo nobaseba, kagayakeru hazu sa

It's wonderland

She watched in amazement as the screen began to grow and she felt herself being drawn into the TV.

'I must have fallen asleep because this can't be real. TV's aren't portals but why did it feel so real and why was I in so much pain?'

The young woman lands on the ground harshly as her knees and hands collide with the ground. The grass may be soft but the dirt underneath is solid. She looks up and sees 5 men gathered around a fire. The sun is sinking towards the horizon. The 5 men rise up and start to approach her. She quickly assesses the situation as the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end. She senses the danger the men pose. She knew she either had to fight them or flee from them. Since it is five against one and she has no weapon, she opts to flee. She jumps to her feet and quickly flees from them. She hears them calling to her

"Why you running girl?"

"Stop!"

"Get back here!"

"Don't let her escape."

'Japanese, what, why are they speaking Japanese?' Though each one of these phases raise an alarm the last one, "Don't let her escape," is the most troubling. Why is she not allowed to escape? The five men keep pace with her. She realizes this, so she pumps her legs harder. She has to outrun them. She starts putting distance between her and her pursuers. One of the men swings a rope with a stone attached over his head to create momentum and releases it. The rope sails through the air and wraps around her legs tripping her. She places her hands in front of her to break her fall. She quickly flips on to her right side and observes that her legs have been wrapped up by a rope. She reaches to remove the rope, when three of the men leap on her. One positions himself over her legs and the other two reach to grab her arms. She pulls her right arm back and makes a fist and slams it into the one man who was over her legs. His head snaps back and there is a sickening crunch as blood starts to stream out of his nose. 'I won't go down without a fight'. She pulls her fist back to punch the other man who is holding her other arm and goes to punch him in the face. The man quickly moves his face out of the way dodging to the right. 'Damn,' the one man going for her right arm finally grabs on to her arm. She twists her hand against his thumb to cause him to release her. She starts to scream, "LET ME GO, LET ME GO AHMmmmmmhh!"

The man holding her left arm slaps her across her face. Blood starts to trickle from the split lip and her vision starts to get faint. She struggles against her fading vision. 'I cannot faint. It's too dangerous. I have to stay awake.' The largest man goes to her and grabs the front of her shirt. The other three men remove themselves from her as the other man lifts her by the shirt. She wraps her hands around his wrist and fixes him with a defiant glare and spits in his face. He tosses her into a nearby tree trunk. She let out an involuntary gasp as air is forcefully expelled from her lungs and the back of her skull collides with the tree. The man wipes the spit from his face.

"Tie her up boys!"

Three of the men approach her as they attempt to grab her arms. She twists them to keep them out of their grasp and when one manages to grab her wrist, she twists and pushes against his thumb but to no avail. Eventually her exhaustion takes hold and she weakens till she can no longer keep herself free. They manage to bind her hands behind the tree. She feels fear course through her veins. She starts to cry and whimper, "Please, just let me go."

She looks into the men's eyes and sees lust and hunger. She knows what is going happen next. The apparent leader, the same one who said, "don't let her escape," is looking her over with a predatory leer and mocks her.

"Why cry? You look like a whore to me. Come now, just spread them for me. Plus look at what you did to my man there. He will have you next,"

He points to the man who had a bloody nose. He grabs the rope and stone that was thrown around her legs. He tosses it to the side. He places his hand where the rope had wrapped around her ankle and starts to move his hand slowly up her leg. She jerks her leg toward herself as if she is recoiling from his touch and then she sends her foot flying back at the offending hand. He moves quickly to avoid her attack. 'Shit! I had hoped I would at least hit him.'

"Ha, you got some fight to you still girl. I'll fix that don't worry."

Her heart is pounding rapidly. She knows that look in his eyes. He holds lust and is determined to show her, he has the power to take what he wants.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

She suddenly has a flashback to when she was 15. She was walking from a concert to a bus stop. It wasn't far, just a few blocks from the venue . She knew she would be safe. It turned out she was very wrong. A man came from behind her. He placed his hand over her mouth so she couldn't cry for help. He wrapped his other arm around her arms so she couldn't slap or punch him. She still struggled. She wiggled and tried to kick him with her legs but he held her close to his body. He dragged her into an alley. He told her to be quiet and she wouldn't be harmed. She didn't know what to do. She just silently sobbed. He then laid her on her back. The young teen stared into his eyes silently begging him not to do this. He then pulled her pants down and unzipped his fly. He forced her legs open and placed himself between her thighs. He thrust into her. She felt her hymen tear. Her innocence was ripped away from her. Her eyes started to water as her vision became blurry. He thrust into her over and over again and held his hand over her mouth. She felt so much pain and anguish and then she felt his seed spill into her and all she did was cry silently. He pulled his hand from her mouth and removed himself from inside her. He told her, she was so sweet and gave her a chaste kiss on the lips. He got up, zipped his fly and told her not to tell anyone because it was all her fault for being so damn beautiful. No one would believe her. He turned his back and walked away. She knew who he was. He was Brandon, a football player in his senior year. She thought he was cute and had teased him. She would flirt with him. She even had thought they would make a cute couple. She pulled her legs to her chest and sobbed. She didn't know how long she stayed like that but she eventually pulled her pants up and headed to the bus stop. The whole time she figured it was her fault. She brought this on. She was so stupid and she deserved it. She went home and jumped in the shower and cried some more just hoping that the running water would wash her clean. Not only her body but her soul as well. She felt tainted. She scrubbed her skin raw. Her body was cleaned but she never felt clean in her soul. Later she learned it wasn't her fault. He was to blame and she vowed to never be so helpless again.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The leader grabs both her ankles and pulls them together. He places his shin over them to lock them in place. He isn't taking another chance at her kicking him. He reached over his side to tug her shorts down. They stop at her knees. She has locked her knees and upper legs tightly together trying as hard as she can to stop this but this just makes him laugh.

"Ah, another challenge? Ha ha ha ha, Gito, Rado."

Two of the men come over, "YEAH OKASHIRA," they say in unison.

"Grab her legs."

"No, please no!" She starts to beg.

"Hai."

One man sits at her left and grabs just above her left knee above her shorts and the other sits at her right and grabs her right leg. The other two men began to pry her legs apart as their Okashira pulls her shorts off her. He tosses them off to the side. The two men hold her legs apart as their leader pulls his hakama down. His member is hard and her eyes go wide in fear. 'It can't be happening again, oh God why me?' She is whimpering as he lowers himself between her legs. The other men remove their hands from her legs. They look on with glee in their eyes. He quickly slams his cock into her and started pounding away. She feels sick to her stomach. It hurts so bad and she just wants it to stop.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

She starts screaming and that is when he places his lips over her mouth and strangles away her screams. He plunges his tongue into her mouth 'Are you fucking kidding me?!' She bites down hard on his tongue. She feels her teeth tear through the mucosa, flesh, and lingual artery and vein. It was nearly severed she could feel his blood freely flowing into her mouth and pouring down the sides of her chin. He tries to free himself from her hold as she refuses to release her grasp. His screams are muffled and garbled. He pushes his hands against the tree behind her trying to get leverage. He finally exits her mouth with one final tug as an audible snap is heard with his tongue being completely severed. The blood is gushing freely from his mouth. She knows he would die soon. He is losing so much blood and he did nothing to stanch the flow. 'He's going to die, good. Wish I could have killed him sooner.' She spits his tongue out of her mouth onto the ground. His men stare in horror as they watch her smile. The blood drips from her mouth. She watches as he quickly retreats from her trapped and blood covered body getting as much distance as he could from her before he collapses. She watches him as his light extinguishes while the sunsets. 'How ironic.' Once the man falls to the ground in front of her, his men rush to his side in shock. They start screaming, "Okashira, okashira, okashira!"

She smiles a most heinous smile and has a vicious gleam in her eyes. His men continue their lament over their fallen leader. They turn to her and draw their katanas. They approach her tired and bloodied form. She sees the murderous glares in their eyes.

"We'll kill you for this bitch!"

'Figured that out already, should be quick at least.' They stalk towards her with measured movements. They're not rushing nor are they going slow. 'They intend to take me down as one. How pathetic. Guess I'm not so helpless after all.' She laughs a bitter laugh. She hears the men answer with snarls. She wraps her hands around the tree and brings her legs close to her and starts to rise up.

"At least let me face death on my feet."

The men stop their advance unsure of what to make of this strange woman. She looks down as she is pushing off the ground. She can feel the once hot liquid now cold and becoming sticky as it was clotting. 'I can only imagine what I look like.' Again she lets out a slight chuckle. By this time she is fully standing and she lifts her head to once again lock eyes with the men who intend to kill her. She is shocked when she sees glowing red eyes behind the men. 'What is that?' She is entranced by this strange entity. She feels a powerful aura rising. The four men are approaching her. She feels the aura rise and it flares out as one man was sliced in half. The other three turn as they hear a strange squishing and cracking sound and felt the hot splash of blood. They turn around just in time to be shredded by green light. She is no longer so sure of her quick death. What is this thing and what did it want? It steps out from the shadow. She sees what it is or more like who it is.


	2. Sesshomaru Appears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru saves Avalon from the Samurais but what happens next. Can she convince him to help her so she can survive in a time she isn't familiar with? Will he accept her knowledge of events?

A man is walking in the trees. He hears her scream, "get the fuck away from me!" He turns to see what is going on. He sees a woman running from five men. 'How pathetic five men against a single female.' He keeps watching the scene unfold but does nothing to intrude. 'This is beneath me.' He watches as one of the men throws a rope that wraps around her legs and she falls to the ground. He sees her as she punches the one holding her legs down and can hear the snap of his nose. She punches again but the other one dodges. The man holding her left arm smacks her across the face. She appeared dazed but continues to struggle. She soon begins to tire. 'I know what would happen next. I have no interest in watching any further.' He turns his gaze to the sky and watches as it slowly darkens and the colors became more vivid. He can hear the man call for assistance. 'How pathetic.' He could hear the sickening sound of him forcing himself on her. He hears her screams strangled away as he quickly smells a lot of blood. He assumes he has slit her throat. 'Nothing but animals, no worse than animals. Monsters.' He hears a struggle. He figures she must be fighting with her last bit of energy as her life would soon fade. He turns his head and is surprised to see it was the male struggling.

Blood is pouring from her mouth but it isn't hers. She holds him in place with her teeth. The man pushes against the tree behind her and with a final tug he is free from her grasp but he isn't going to last. He has lost too much blood. She spits his tongue on the ground. Now this is interesting. She is smiling. He watches as the four men stare in horror as the fifth man scrambles away from her trapped and bloodied form. 'What loathsome creatures.' He finds himself angry as the four men approach her with blades drawn. 'She is fighting for her very life and managed to kill her attacker with hands tied behind her back.' He moves closer to the scene. He sees her starting to stand. She is looking down, "at least let me face death on my feet." 'Proud woman.'

Then she looks up and her whole disposition changes. She sees him. She did not look so sure anymore. He slits one man down the middle head to toe. The other three turn as he lets loose his whip and slices them to pieces. He steps from the shadows. She is watching him closely and he sees a spark of recognition and hope before her head goes down.

The woman knows instantly who is her savior, it is Sesshomaru. Her heart just about leaps out of her chest. She has an overwhelming sense of relief. Then it strikes her hard, 'I'm in Inuyasha and Sesshomaru is not the hero. It all depends on where in the series I'm at.' She quickly looks and sees that he has both arms and only Tenseiga. She bows her head 'Oh no, he hasn't even met Rin yet. I finally get to meet my favorite character and he is more likely to slaughter me than anything else.'

Sesshomaru approaches the female and notices that she has bowed her head.

"Please forgive my boldness by looking upon your form."

"Hmmm?" 'Strange does she know how to act in my presence?'

She can tell he is not expecting that to come from her mouth. "I am but a lowly ningen and you are the great and powerful Lord Sesshomaru."

'This woman knows my name and title, have we met?' She watches his feet as he walks behind her back and she hears a soft snap and feels the bindings go slack. She quickly lowers herself into a ball and covers her modesty the best she can. She hears him speak in a cold and collected voice but demanding as well.

'To show such pride and defiance one moment and then to cower in a ball pathetic. I feel myself becoming frustrated with her.'

"Get up."

She rises with those words. She is shocked Sesshomaru was talking to her. "Yes my Lord."

He grabs her chin roughly to make her look at him.

She meets his eyes with determination. 'I don't know what he wants but I won't show him fear.'

"What is your name ningen?"

"Avalon."

'No hint of fear in her eyes. Perhaps it was not fear but simply modesty that made her act that way but Avalon an odd name and not Japanese. I smell the other man's sex on her. I do not like the way it clings to her. She smells of cream and melon but with that man's scent added it is nauseating.'

"You need to bathe."

With that he releases her face and turns to leave. She moves her hand to grab at his sleeves that flutter behind him then drops her hands with a slight frown on her face.'Does he mean to leave me behind?'

"Please wait Lord Sesshomaru!"

"Oh?"

He turns back around to face her, a slight scowl on his face. She looks in his face trying to discern his motives but she cannot come up with an answer.

"I am unsure what you wish of me and I do not know the area."

'So, she did not understand why I freed her. I will have to be patient. Perhaps her trauma affects her comprehension.'He levels his gaze at her and slowly states,

"you proved entertaining. This Sesshomaru decided to free you. Come, this one will lead you to water."

"I wait, I was entertaining? You mean, I see. Thank you."

She finishes her sentence with a softer voice and lowers her eyes.

'I feel such a fool of course he would find my torture entertaining. I still need his help though and I had something he would appreciate, knowledge.'

"I can be of use to you."

He raised an eyebrow at her. 'This ningen thinks she can be of use to me? How humorous and presumptuous.'

"How can a ningen be of use to this Sesshomaru?"

"Entertainment for one apparently."

'Does she think I found her rape to be entertaining? Was that why she seemed so sad before? Pathetic.'Sesshomaru internally ludicrously scoffs and shakes his head but gives no further acknowledgement of what Avalon just said.

"Alright if not entertainment then how about information?"

'Does she think this Sesshomaru is a fool?'

"You just stated you do not know the area. What information could you have?"

Sesshomaru is surprised to see the look of concentration crossing Avalon's face as if she was debating something very important in her head.

'Oh God would this really work? I've watched the series several times and I am fairly familiar with it but what if I messed up the timeline and then the info was invalid? Shit would this even work? I would have to give him bits and pieces just enough to keep me valuable but not enough to affect the series, shit. I CAN DO THIS!' With sudden determination registering on her face and an excessively loud proclamation

"I know your future Lord Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru raises an eyebrow and looks at her incredulously.

"You know this one's future?"

'Impossible the simple fact that I am bound by no fate but my own making. How could one know my future. This ningen must be trying to trick me.'

"Yes, well parts of it and I know you are looking for your father's tomb, are you not?"

Quicker than Avalon can move or think Sesshomaru moves to grasp her throat and lifts her off the ground. He holds her at eye level as her feet dangle inches off the ground. With both her hands she grabs onto his wrist that is wrapped around her throat and uses her strength to ease her breathing. She has no illusion of being able to fight him off.

"What would you know of the goings on of one such as this Sesshomaru?"

'How would she know that I search for my Chichiue's tomb? Did she hear of it from my retainer?' Avalon tries to speak but all that comes out is a gurgling noise and Sesshomaru realizes he holds her too tight and is crushing her throat. He releases his grasp and she lands on her feet. He glares at her but also a part of him is surprised at her being able to land on her feet.

"SPEAK"

She brings her hands to her throat and massages the soreness and attempts to speak,

"I I …. (coughing) told you I know your future."

"How?"

She looks into his eyes and see the demand behind the simple question but knows that he would never believe her if she told him the truth. She notices her body starting to lean away from his penetrating stare and corrects the unconscious move to straighten once again.

"I just do. I wouldn't lie to you. I am not that foolish."

'She intends to keep her secret I see.' "Do you know where the tomb lies?"

"I do."

"You will show this Sesshomaru."

Avalon quickly realizes he wasn't asking he was telling her. Her hands start to shake as she tries to come up with another plan to get what she needed. She quickly makes a fist to stop the quivering 'No I have to get his protection out of this. If I speak, act, or step wrong I can be killed. I know a single man isn't a match for me but a group or even a single demon could over power me. How do I fix this?'

"I can give you more than just its location. I can tell you other things that would be of help to you but as with everything there is a cost."

'What could she be playing at? I would humor her for now.' "What do you require of this one?"

"A promise on your honor to have me as your advisor of sorts allow me to follow you as I wish and to help keep me safe."

Sesshomaru's expression does not change but his eyes hold a burning anger that slowly dies as he considers her words.

'To think this woman would seek a place at my side, what would she know of what she asked?'

"You are very bold for a ningen."

"I am very bold for an onna."

"Hn, I will grant your request if you do in fact know where the tomb is, if you have lied, this Sesshomaru will make you wish that you were left to those men."

Avalon nods and has no fear since she knows exactly where the tomb is.

'Well at least I can save Inuyasha from being tormented by the image of his dead mother.'

'She is calm I can detect no hint of fear coming from her. Perhaps she truly believes she knows where it is, we shall see.'

"LORD SESSHOMARU! LORD SESSHOMARU! Where are you my Lord? LORD SESSHOMARU!"

Avalon turns her head towards the familiar voice of Jaken. He can be heard from the trees behind her. Sesshomaru also looks in his direction but does not grace Jaken with a reply. Jaken finally emerges from the line of trees and bushes and his eyes bulge out of his head even more than normal when they land on Avalon.

"Wwwhhatt isss that?"Jaken lifts a shaking hand pointing at her.

'Oh yeah I forgot I must look quite scary.'Avalon fixes her gaze on Jaken and smiles menacingly at him. He steps backwards and seems to fear for his life.

"Jaken, can you not recognize a ningen onna?"Sesshomaru barks. 'What an embarrassment my retainer is, afraid of a ningen.'

"Go, you will get her some decent clothing and footwear."

"Yyyeesss Milord!"

He runs in the opposite direction turning around to grab his staff once again.

"Thank you my Lord."

"This Sesshomaru cannot have a blood soaked leech near me." 'It would be embarrassing enough traveling with a ningen at least she could look presentable.'

Avalon can feel the bite to his words. It is not out of kindness she is to be dressed. It is out of his pride. She assumes he didn't like the smell. 'I know Inuyasha hated the smell of human blood on his claws perhaps Sesshomaru did as well, However I knew he would not hesitate to kill if he felt it necessary.'

Avalon walks to where her shorts are and scoops them up being very cautious not to expose herself to Sesshomaru and shimmies them up her body behind a tree. She goes over to the leader and strips him of his kimono as it is the only one still intact, bloody as it is. She inspects the man's katanas. She gathers 3 as 2 were completely destroyed by Sesshomaru's attack. She decides to keep "okashira's" as it is in the best shape. None of the footwear will work for her since they are all too large. Sesshomaru watches as Avalon is sorting through the carnage.

'Interesting she is calm and calculating. I cannot see a hint of pity. Is she as cold as I?'

Once Avalon gathers what she could she walks over to Sesshomaru and looks him in the eye as her lips twist up into a half smile.

"Can you please lead me to the nearest place to bathe?"

He starts to walk away and Avalon follows him. She takes in the seen around her. Though it is dark the moon offers some lighting and she can see the large trees reaching skywards. She shivers a little. It has nothing to do with the temperature. She keeps forcing the moment of her recent rape to the back of her mind. She knows it will not help her to dwell on it. She already killed the perpetrator. She compartmentalizes it and stores it for later. They soon came upon a slow moving stream. Avalon walks over to the water and kneels over and places her hand in the water."Brrrrrrrr," she quickly withdraws her hand. 'Guess I should gather some wood and start a fire.'She turns and walks towards the wooded area and starts to gather sticks and wood.

"What are you doing? DO you intend to make yourself a warm bath?"

"No, my Lord but I will need a fire once I exit the water. I could get sick if I do not have a source of warmth after I bathe."

"Hn, get in the water this Sesshomaru will start the fire."

"Hai my Lord."Avalon walks back to the water. She places the katana on the shore and gets in the water with the kimono. 'Didn't expect that. Must be about efficiency.'

Avalon starts to scrub the kimono trying to get rid of as much blood as possible and then tosses it up on shore. She then starts to scrub her body as best as she can still being clothed. She can feel the crusted blood loosening from my hair and body. She knows her clothes are stained beyond repair but she won't discard them. They have value still so she scrubs them as best as she can while on her body. She looks into the water and notices a flicker of light. She turns around and can see the flicker of the flame on shore. 'He must be finished with the fire.'She heads back to shore and as she is about to step out of the water Sesshomaru surprises her when he asks

"What are you doing?"

"I am done with..."

"Remove your clothing."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo we love it we love we want some more of it!


	3. Remove my WHAT!?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He said remove her what? Avalon begins to understand what interacting with Sesshomaru will mean for her.

"Remove your clothing." 'Did she truly think she was clean when she had not removed her clothing?'

"Uhm..."

Avalon looks at Sesshomaru in surprise. Did he really just tell her to strip? 'Do I really have a choice?' Deciding that it will most likely end with her naked anyway she simply does as he tells her. She isn't embarrassed of her body but it isn't exactly correct to be naked in front of Sesshomaru. She heads back to get deeper into the water and then she leans over and removes her shorts and brings them between her hands and starts rubbing them vigorously to clean them the best she can. She then tosses them up on shore. She goes to face away from Sesshomaru as she is about to remove her shirt when Sesshomaru's voice stops her movements

"Stop, turn back around."

'Shit, is he trying to humiliate me' "Sure"

She flinches and then composes her face into a soft smile and slowly turns back to face him.

'I was intrigued she did not argue with me but complied. Perhaps she knows her place when it came to me being a Lord. I had suspected I would have to be more forceful with my words.'

She pulls her blood stained shirt over her head. She knows she has a good looking body. She is toned and her breasts are perky. Her pale skin glistens in the moonlight as her thigh length black hair flows down behind her trailing into the water. She has trained in martial arts since her rape when she was 15. She also trained in Kendo and archery. She knows she is decent with the katana and that was why she had stopped to grab one. A sour expression crosses her face as she thought back, 'If only it was one on one or even two against me I would have stopped them. 10 freaking years and it still wasn't enough!' Shaking her head to dismiss the thought she looks to see Sesshomaru's intense gaze looking at her body.

"See anything you like?" She didn't know if that was a wise thing to say but she said it. She then corrects herself. "Does my body please you my Lord?"

Sesshomaru's eyes narrow and send her a deathly glare but he continues to eye Avalon's body. 'I see that her body is well toned and she is healthy. I will not deny she is attractive but she is beneath me.' Sesshomaru is still eyeing her as she goes back to bathing. She scrubs her shirt free of as much blood as possible and tosses it on shore and then scrubs her body. When she is sure she is as clean as she can get she steps out of the water without shame and grabs her acquired katana, the kimono, shirt, and shorts. She walks right over to the fire and throw her shirt onto the ground and sits on top of it. She lays her other clothing out next to her to let them dry and sets the katana down next to her. All the while Sesshomaru has not looked elsewhere. She has noticed it but she cannot figure out what his intentions are and honestly she doesn't care. Her mind keeps drifting back to her recent attack and she keeps pushing it to the back of her mind. She looks from the corner of her eye and notices the Sesshomaru is removing his sword. 'Odd, not that it would harm me anyway.' She watches transfixed as he removes his obi and armor and then his kimono. He never lets his gaze wander from her. She suddenly has a horrible realization, 'Does he intent to rape me!' Her heartbeat began to quicken and her blood began to flow faster. She holds her katana with a deathly grip but knows it would do her no good. Part of her is excited for some reason by the idea of him taking her but another part is screaming to get away and to fight to her last breath.

Sesshomaru can hear her quickening heartbeat. 'Does she think I will be engaging in sexual activity with her? Is she afraid? Has she heard of demons raping women? Perhaps but I would do no such a thing. I value my honor above all else and rape is never honorable.' He tosses his kimono over to her. It lands on top of her head.

"Put it on. Jaken will be back soon."

She slips on the kimono and notices how the material is wonderfully soft, silky, and holds his warmth.

"Thank you my Lord."

Sesshomaru redresses himself as Avalon put on his kimono. She turns to look at the fire with a contemplative look on her face. Sesshomaru keeps his eye on her expression. He is waiting for the breakdown he is sure is coming. She is simply trying to keep her demons from surfacing again. She doesn't want to be that crying, broken, little girl again. She doesn't know what to say to Sesshomaru so she simply figures she will wait until Jaken returns. She idly wonders what Sesshomaru is thinking of and why he keeps staring at her. Avalon wonders how long the silence will last when suddenly it is broken by a loud grumble. She turns her head down and has a slight pink dust her cheeks.

"I apologize I must be hungry."

"Then go feed yourself."

"Uh, like I said, I'm not from around here and I have no idea what is edible and I have no means of catching live prey."

Sesshomaru nods his head as if thinking of something. 'This will be bothersome having to feed this onna. What a hassle.' He then stands and starts to walk away from the fire towards the forest.

Avalon watches him as he leaves and hopes he is going to look for food and isn't just tiring of her.

Sesshomaru travels further into the forest along the stream and comes upon a duck asleep in the brush. He snatches the bird with lightning speed and effortlessly snaps its' neck. He turns the bird over in his hands and slits the belly open and digs the innards out. He tosses them into the stream and turns around and heads back the way he came. He emerges from the trees. Avalon is staring at him. She has not moved since he left and kept her gaze where he departed from . A half smile graces her lips when she sees the bird in his hands. He walks closer to her and tosses the bird to her. She catches it with both of her hands. She turns the offered item over in her hands as she then comes to a stark realization. 'I have to prep this thing to eat it and where are the guts did he eat them?' She gives her head a slight shake trying to dislodge the image that she just painted for herself. She places the duck down on a nearby rock and pushes her sleeves up and over her shoulders to keep the clothing as clean as possible and picks the duck back up and starts to pluck the feathers.

Sesshomaru looks at her with slight admiration since she has thought to avoid sullying his kimono with blood. Avalon tosses the feathers into the fire as she pulls them off. 'Jeesh this is harder than I thought it would be.' A slight sheen of sweat forms on her forehead. Absentmindedly she uses the back of her forearm to wipe it away. She gazes at her blood covered hand and thinks back to when that man violated her. Her heartbeat picks up as she is brought back and she feels vulnerable again. As quick as the thoughts enter her head she pushes them back with as much vigor as she can. 'NO I need to push those thoughts away. I need to survive. I cannot drag myself down that rabbit hole again. It isn't my fault. I didn't cause it. He and his men are to blame and they are all dead.' She closes her eyes and forces her heart to slow and her nerves to calm.

Sesshomaru notices the change in her heartbeat as well as her scent and idly wonders what is happening when the heartbeat slows and the scent starts to dissipate. Avalon goes back to plucking the bird. She finishes and walks over to the stream and bends over, rinsing the duck and her hands free of blood. She places the duck in the crook of her elbow and starts searching the ground for branches that would work for making a spit and cradle for the bird. She bends over a few times and finds 2 "Y" shaped branches and a sturdy looking skewering branch. She walks back over to the fire and gives Sesshomaru a small apologetic smile.

"Uh, Sesshomaru-sama, would you mind holding the bird or placing the branches in the ground for me?"

Sesshomaru looks over at her and sees her hands are full and decides on placing the two Y branches in the ground for her. He reaches out and grabs the two Y shaped branches. He rises from his seat and walks to one side of the fire and thrust the branch into the ground, then walks to the other side and repeats the process.

"Thank you my Lord."

He gives her a slight nod of his head in acknowledgement. Sesshomaru strides back to where he was sitting previously and sits down once more. Avalon turns to look at the bird still in her hands and gives a slight scowl. 'Not much conversation here'. She thrusts the skewer through the back end of the bird and forcing it to penetrate the neck. She sets the bird on the cradle that was created to roast the bird. She settles herself in front of the fire and watches as the flames lick at the flesh of the bird. 'I wonder how I'll know when it's done?' She soon smells the savory scent of the meat roasting and her mouth starts to water. She glances to her left when she hears rustling in the trees. She isn't afraid. She is just curious who it is, when Jaken emerges from the trees holding a bundle.

"MY LORD! I have retrieved the clothing for the wench."

"WENCH!" Avalon is up in front of the little imp so quick Jaken jumps back in surprise. Sesshomaru watches with a glint of amusement in his eye. 'I wonder how she will react. She seems offended by the word "wench".' Avalon reaches for the bundle and relieves Jaken of it and turns and stomps away while throwing over her shoulder, "Thank you for serving Lord Sesshomaru so well TOAD!"

"That is Jaken-sama to you, Wench."

The amusement dies in Sesshomaru's eyes as he realizes she will engage his retainer no further. He then speculates, 'was it out of fear of Jaken? No she had no scent of fear. Perhaps it was respect for me. Good, however that is rather boring. I am sure my retainer will annoy her again. I wonder how long she will restrain her temper.'

"Jaken"

"Yes, My Lord."

"Keep the duck from burning. It will be your job to provide food for Avalon while she is in our group."

Jaken gasps and looks up at Sesshomaru with horror filled eyes and his mouth slightly open. Jaken attempts to collect himself but stammers

"Ah ah ahhhh as you wish, my Lord. But how long will she be with us?"

Sesshomaru sends him a glare but says nothing since he himself did not have the answer. Jaken recognizes that glare and prostrates himself on the ground.

"Please forgive me my Lord!"

Avalon keeps stomping into the trees but all she wants to do is turn around and go beat the ever living pulp out of the little toad. 'I would and could, but I don't know if he would find it funny or disrespectful.' Once she is behind a thick bunch of trees she removes Sesshomaru's kimono and places it gently on a branch. She unwraps the little bundle and slips on the new kimono Jaken provided. She watches as the material spills onto the ground and realizes how fancy it is.

"This isn't for traveling!"

She looks at the kimono it is deep blue and has beautiful cherry blossoms on the sleeves and along the bottom. The obi is a pretty pink that matches the color of the cherry blossoms. 'This is just going to get ruined. I'm sure Sesshomaru doesn't want me ruining his. But how do I put this thing on?' She grabs the large wide strap of material. "Well I know this is an obi but what are these thin ones and how do I get this kimono to not drag on the ground?" She frowns and attempts to lift the material of the kimono and tying it with the obi but then it just slips right back out. She murmurs softly to herself "This will never work grrrrrr 'Memoirs of a Geisha' why can't I remember it better I'm sure there was a scene on how to put this thing on." Finally steeling her nerves she calls loudly and hopes he comes "SESSHOMARU-SAMA PLEASE COME HELP ME!" She holds her breath and waits within moments Sesshomaru appears beside her in a highly agitated state his eyes flashing from left to right searching from something.

"Where is the danger?"

"Danger, oh no there is no danger at least not that I'm aware of I just can't figure out how to put this thing on."

Sesshomaru turns to look at her. The kimono is parted at the front exposing her middle and the obi hangs loosely around her waist.

"I see"

Sesshomaru grabs the obi and removes it and pulls the kimono off of her. Avalon gives him an indignant look but he doesn't pay it any mind. He grabs the white nagajuban that was still in the package and put it on her. He forcefully spins her around and pulls the collar down in the back and turns her back around. He fixes her front putting the right panel under the left and put on a soft sash under her breasts. He places the kimono on Avalon and he pulls the front of it up till the material was no longer resting on the ground and grabs a himo and ties it around her. He smoothes the kimono down and ties the obi around her making sure the bow was in the back.

"There."

Sesshomaru then stalks out of the woods back to the camp. Avalon calls after him

"Ah, thanks."

She grabs his kimono and slips on the sandals and walks back out of the wood. Sesshomaru's head turns to watch her as she approaches the camp. She walks over to him and hands him back the kimono and gives a slight bow

"Thank you most graciously for lending me your kimono Sesshomaru-sama."

She looks around the fire for her katana finding it right where she left it, she picks it up and places it in her obi and turns towards the fire. She pulls the blade from the sheath and sets her sights on Jaken.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment or kudo thank you!


	4. Death to Jaken?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jaken and Avalon face off, who will win?

Sesshomaru watches as Avalon draws her blade and stalks towards his retainer. He considers that it would be a cruel outcome for him if she succeeds but knows she would never be able to. He keeps his gaze fixed on her and readies himself to move if necessary. Jaken notices Avalon approaching from behind and turns around with a start realizing her blade is drawn and shouts, reaching for his staff

"Back wench! Before I roast you alive!"

Avalon stops her stride in a moment of shock. Then can't help but start laughing. She finds herself doubling over and clutching her side as tears start to slip from the sides of her eyes.

Sesshomaru watches with intrigue, 'has she lost her mind?'

"What is so funny!" Jaken demands.

Avalon holds her side trying to ease the slight ache that laughing so hard causes and moves her hand to wipe the tears from her eyes and tries to speak. "I…. Ah… I" then breaks into another fit of laughter. Taking a few short breaths she tries again. "Jaken, I was only going to slice the bird to see if it was done."

"What?"

"ningen need the meat to be fully cooked or else we can get sick and one way to check that is to slice the bird and see if the fluid runs clear." Avalon continues towards the fire with her blade tilted down. She reaches for the bird and grabs the skewer it was resting on, slicing the bird along the breast and watches as the fluid runs clear, 'finally, I can eat, I'm starving.' She places the bird to rest away from the fire to let it cool. She swipes her blade away from everyone with as much force as she can to relieve blade of the birds juices. She picks up the damp kimono and wipes the blade and finally wipes it dry on her kimono and places it back it the sheath. Sesshomaru has followed her actions and realizes she knows how to care for the blade making him wonder what else she will do to surprise him.

"ningen, you will address me as Master Jaken."

"TOAD, you keep saying that."

"You disrespectful wench."

Avalon decides it isn't worth the headache or argument right now and simply ignores him. She turns around and sits not too far from Sesshomaru.

"ningen wench address me as Jaken-sama…..Are you listening to me, I am the great and powerful Jaken-sama most loyal vassal of the most powerful Sesshomaru-sama. You will respect me."

Avalon still refuses to acknowledge him and turns her gaze to the stars and realizes it has become quite late. She estimates it is most likely to be after 11. Jaken continues his tirade and screams. "WENCH!"

Even Sesshomaru was tiring of Jaken's foolishness and tosses a stone at his head to silence him. Avalon hearing the light thud turns her head and watches as Jaken falls to the ground unconscious. "Thank you Lord Sesshomaru, I am most grateful."

Sesshomaru nods his head and turns his head to gaze up at the stars. Avalon looks over at the bird, she gets up from where she is sitting to see if the duck is cool enough to handle. Poking it with her finger and finding her finger isn't scorched she reaches for a wing and rips it away and bites down. The wonderful taste of the duck along with her hunger makes her release a soft moan. Sesshomaru's head moves sharply to look as her. She sees the movement from the side of her eye, once she was done chewing. "Would you like some? I thought you didn't eat ningen food."

"No."

"Suit yourself. Hey you think Jaken would like some when he wakes?"

"Perhaps."

"Okay." She continues to eat her fill but leaves enough for the morning and some for Jaken. 'Well this is a good as time as any. Hope he doesn't kill me for asking these questions.'

"Lord Sesshomaru, I have a question about you, if you were to lose a finger, how long before it would no longer be able to be attached?"

Sesshomaru internally scoffs at the idea. "This Sesshomaru would never lose a finger."

Avalon wants to roll her eyes but she knows it wasn't a good idea. "Please humor me, theoretically, if it was only severed and no other damage, how long would it still be viable."

"Several moons."

"Wow that is amazing." Avalon theorizes that a limb could be viable an extended amount of time because she had remembered a later episode explaining that powerful demons could survive without their heads for several days. However, to imagine that it would apply to a limb for several months was astounding. "Lord Sesshomaru, I know you are an Inu Dai-youkai does that have any bearing on why your limb would be viable for so long?"

A quick look of astonishment passes over Sesshomaru's face before his normal stoic one replaces it rather quickly. He gasps the idea that she knew what he was and wondered what more she knew. "Yes."

"Do you have anything you would like to ask me?"

Sesshomaru simply raises his eyebrow at her.

'Ah father's tomb.' Avalon quickly corrects herself. "Other than where your father's tomb is, my Lord?"

"No."

"Very well, I will guide us when I wake in the morning if that is alright with you my Lord?"

"Yes, now rest ningen."

"Yes my Lord."

Avalon curls up between the fire and Sesshomaru. She can feel her body relaxing and feels herself drifting closer to the drop off point of consciousness. 'I feel oddly safe right next to the most dangerous demon alive. Go figure' with those last thoughts she is out cold drifting off into a deep sleep from the exhausting day she had.

Sesshomaru peers down at the young woman sleeping at his feet and wonders how she could simply fall asleep so quickly. He knew his aura would make most living things squirm until they were used to it. He thinks to himself, how this woman could seem so comfortable around him and knows more than he would have suspected. He remembers back to when he had glimpsed her eyes the first time they met. They are an interesting color for a ningen, green in the center around her black pupils with light blue ringing the green. They were open and inviting much more than any he had seen previously. He stares at her face looking at the straight but small nose, high and prominent cheekbones. However she did not look undernourished. His gaze wanders to her lips and sees they are small but plump and have a rosy pink hue. Her skin is pale nearly as pale as his. He reaches for her hand and finds she is limp to his touch as he turns her palm up and sees that there are slight callouses but they do not look to be from working but form swordplay. There are small scars but nothing that would suggest she had worked in a field or home. He lays her hand back down and tries to place her face. He cannot, even though he knows she is distinct enough that he would recognize her anywhere. 'I suppose if she shows me the tomb and she stays with me as she wishes I will learn why she knows what she knows.' A dark smirk crosses his face as he thinks of the other option. 'If she has been lying to this Sesshomaru, I will torture her and hopefully she will spill her guts, before I spill them. Part of me truly hopes it does not come to that not only because I do not particularly like killing women and children but also part of me feels a connection to her. How odd, why would I feel a connection to this ningen? More questions with no answers, a puzzle for me to figure out.' Sesshomaru continues to ponder his thoughts but finds he is only going around in circles and frustrating himself. He turns his gaze to the stars and tries to clear his mind.

As he is gazing at the sky he hears a slight rustling sound in front of him. He looks down and sees her shivering. He assumes she is cold had uses his fur pelt to cover her shaking form. Her shaking stills after a little while and he goes back to watching as the moon crosses the night sky. As the sun is finally rising Sesshomaru notices that Avalon is waking.

She can see the sunlight filtering through her eyelids. He quickly pulls his fur pelt from her body. She notices the sudden loss of warmth and wonders briefly what was keeping her warm when she then comes to the conclusion it had to be his fur pelt. She feels touched and honored he would use it to warm her while she slept. She slowly sits up and looks around. Her eyes sweep around the campsite and sees Jaken asleep but the smoldering fire. She moves her eyes back around to where she knew Sesshomaru was last night when her eyes land on him she looks into his eyes and finds herself transfixed by the golden orbs that stare back at her. They did not compare to what the anime portrayed and the sinking sun and moonlight would never highlight the true beauty and depth of them. After a few moments, she tries to look away but she cannot bring herself to. Sesshomaru notices that Avalon's eyes seem to be held by his gaze and takes the opportunity to observe the color of her eyes more thoroughly. He sees the green seems to be that of a deep emerald and the light blue reminds him of a summer day. There are silver slivers that shoot through the green into the blue once he is satisfied with his observations he slowly closes his eyes and Avalon takes that opportunity to look away. By this point she has a slight pink dusting her cheeks and worries he might have taken offense and in an attempt to dissuade the awkwardness she asks. "Should we wake him?"

Sesshomaru fixes her with a stern look and she finds herself pulling into herself. She gets up and shakes her head and walks away towards the small stream they made camp by. She leans over and splashes the cool water in her face and contemplates why he seems so upset then it hit her. 'I said we' with her new found realization she walks back and asks, "would my Lord like me to wake Jaken?"

Sesshomaru nods his head and leans it over in Jaken's direction. Avalon walks over to Jaken and nudges him with her foot. Jaken jumps up and starts spluttering. "Wha, wha?" He looks over towards where he was nudged and locks eyes with Avalon and starts screaming at her. "You wench how dare you kick me. I should roast you alive."

She rolls her eyes at him.

"You disrespectful whore."

Avalon feels her anger spike to an altogether new high. She reacts with very little thought and leaps over and grabs his staff. 'Without this he is nothing but a sniveling worm.' "Come you nasty toad show me how you are better than me. You are a sniveling idiot. You rely on your Lord's name for protection, however without it you are nothing but a worthless imp. Prove your worth defend yourself!" She stood to her full height with her back straight and the staff held horizontally in front of her.

"Give me my staff wench!"

"Oh this?"

She turns the staff slightly to the side to where Jaken could just about reach it and then returns it back to the original horizontal position. "No. Try and take it."

Jaken jumps at it as Avalon easily moves it beyond his reach. He attempts several times while Sesshomaru watches with an amused look in his eyes. He had been waiting for this to happen. Avalon continues the childish behavior for several more minutes but finds that her anger has died away and she is simply getting bored and starts to feel bad for the little imp.

"Enough Jaken, this is ridiculous. You cannot take the staff from me and I no longer wish to withhold it from you so let's come to an agreement. I will call you Jaken if you call me Avalon. Agreed?"

"I am Master Jaken."

"Jaken how do you feel master applies to you, when you cannot even remove this staff from my person?"

"I am Master Jaken"

"Then I am Lady Avalon"

"What?!"

"Well if you are Master of nothing, I can be Lady of nothing."

"Fine, hand over my staff."

"Ask me for it," she could tell that making him ask was killing his ego.

"Can I have my staff?"

"Sure." With a smug look on her face she places the staff within his reach. Jaken quickly plucks the staff from her grasp and holds it to his chest cradling it as if it is the most precious thing in his life. 'Guess it might be since it's probably the only thing he's ever received from Sesshomaru.' Avalon looks over at Sesshomaru and sees him watching with a neutral expression on his face.

"Master Jaken can you show me what fruits are edible?"

Jaken looks at her with a surprised look on his face, nods and leads her into the woods. Sesshomaru has watched the entire exchange and has become bored as it continues. He was about to step in when Avalon ended the whole affair by coming to an agreement with Jaken. He idly wonders how long the agreement will last as he watches as Jaken leads her into the forest.

Jaken leads her through the undergrowth till they came to a patch of berries. She grabs one and rubs it on her wrist.

"What are you doing?"

"Testing it Master Jaken, I might be allergic to it."

"What is allergic?"

"Hmmm, well my body might react badly to it, so I'm testing it before I eat them." Avalon gathers as many as she can carry and heads back to camp with Jaken following behind. She emerges from the trees and grabs her shirt that was left on the ground by the fire and places the berries in it.

"There." She smiles to herself, then grabs the leftover duck and takes a chunk off and starts eating it. "Here Master Jaken have some."

Jaken looks at the portion of meat she is offering and looks with big open eyes

"For me?"

"Yeah why not? I'm sure your hungry too."

Jaken gingerly grasps the offered meat and starts to chow down. Avalon notices that the fire was put out while they had been out searching. She figured Sesshomaru is wanting to start moving out. She rises from her seated position and starts to walk to Sesshomaru knowing she will have to ask some dangerous questions and starting to feel some intense feelings of trepidation. She steels herself and keeps on walking to him.

"Lord Sesshomaru I would like to speak with you in private."

Sesshomaru raises his eyebrow at the odd request but can tell she is rather nervous so decides to humor her.

"Jaken make yourself scarce."

Jaken looks over at Sesshomaru with a puzzled look but answer

"Hai Milord."

He gets up and scampers off. Sesshomaru returns his gaze to Avalon awaiting for her to continue.

"Lord Sesshomaru, I believe it's about time we start making our way to you father's tomb but I must ask something you will not like. Please understand most everything I will ask of you has purpose even if you may not understand why. Also please understand I cannot always tell you why. And please do not kill me for asking this. So here goes, where is your half-brother Inuyasha?"

Sesshomaru goes from being mildly curious to being extremely angry and narrows his eyes and sends her a death glare. She audibly gulps without meaning to. She wonders if this is her end. However Sesshomaru makes no move to harm her but states with a tight tone, "he is dead for all intents and purposes."

"So he is sealed to the tree by the Miko's arrow?"

A glimpse of surprise replaces the angry glare. 'How could she know of such things?' He answers with a bored tone, "Yes."

"I should like to see, it will help me figure out what we need to do next."

He raises his eyebrow and tries to figure out why she would want to see it but figures if it would get him closer to his father's tomb perhaps it was worth the frustration.

Avalon amends her statement and adds, "I do not make my requests for no reason. They do have a purpose."

"We will leave as soon as Jaken returns."

"Hai my Lord."

Avalon moves about the camp, collecting her various clothing items. She lays out the old kimono on the ground and rolls her shirt around the berries she had picked. She puts that bundle on the kimono. She removes the skewer from the duck and sticks it next to her shirt. She grabs her shorts and walks away to slip them on under her kimono and returns moments later to see Jaken has returned. She rolls the kimono around her food items and wraps the little bundle around her waist with the food on her right hip while her katana is on her left hip and the knot is on her side. She makes sure she can easily access her blade if need be and steps beside Sesshomaru.

"I'm ready to go now."

He nods and starts to lead the way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE COMMENT OR KUDO THANK YOU!!


	5. On the Move

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Demons attack trying to take Avalon from Sesshomaru and things get tense when the daiyoukai follows her to wash.

Avalon and Jaken follow Sesshomaru as he starts to head out. He sets a brisk pace. He assumes there will be frequent stops and progress will be slow but finds that Avalon seems to stop only when she is in need of a drink. He finds himself pleased with the progress.

She munches on the duck and after eating a single berry and finding no ill effects she eats more as they go. Avalon lets her eyes wander as they walk, looking at the many different plants and animals. She looks at the beautiful blue sky with light fluffy clouds passing over head. It is pleasantly warm and she assumes it must be spring rolling into summer.

They continue their journey passing through trees and underbrush when Sesshomaru suddenly stops and turns his head to the left. Avalon stops and looks in the same direction straining her eyes to see what he is looking at as Jaken walks right into the back of her leg. Jaken lets out a small squawk of protest but seeing that Sesshomaru and Avalon both have stopped, he makes no further noise. He also looks to the left. Moments later 2 male individuals walk out, approaching Sesshomaru. They bow before him. They both look human but the elven ears and ethereal beauty gave them away. One is as tall as Avalon and the other is an inch shorter at most. They both have jet black hair and piercing slate, gray eyes. Their skin is tan but they have no markings. Avalon can feel her skin crawling just looking at the two beings. She finds herself backing up and hiding behind Sesshomaru. She is holding the hilt of her katana so tightly her knuckles are white, ready to pull her blade at a moment's notice. The tallest speaks, "I am Hakai and this is my brother Ojike."

'Destruction and fright?' Even their names make her uneasy. She peeks out to look over at the two demons. They are no longer bowing and have taken a defensive pose. Hakai leans forward and again speaks, "you have entered our forest without our leave Lord Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru does not move and does not acknowledging their claim. Jaken gets out in front and puts himself between Sesshomaru and the two demons. "Lord Sesshomaru does not need permission!"

Ojike is looking over the group and sees Avalon. She accidentally meets his eyes. A frightening smile spreads across his face as his eyes rake over her body. Ojike speaks, "Brother I like the girl."

Avalon looks away and looks at Sesshomaru's back. She cannot see that Sesshomaru's eyes narrow. Hakai looks past Sesshomaru to see the girl. He glances at his brother and can tell how eager he is to have the woman. Ojike has always loved to hear them scream. "Lord Sesshomaru I will make you an offer, the girl for safe passage."

Jaken is flabbergasted at the audacity of these two demons and cannot put words together. Sesshomaru takes a menacing step forwards. Answering in a deadly tone. "And if I refuse?"

"We will have no choice but to take her by force."

With that said, Ojike seems to disappear, reappearing in two places, one at his brother's side and the other behind Avalon. He quickly clasps his hand over her mouth and the other around her waist. Avalon's eyes widen instantly and her heart rate skyrockets. She rips her katana from its sheath and plows it into her captors left arm then pulls it back out and goes to plunge the blade back in. Ojike does not release her but his grip slackens as blood flows freely from his arm and she struggles to get free.

Sesshomaru hearing and smelling the fresh blood turns and quickly strikes Ojike down by lopping off his head. The image of Ojike by his brother disappears. Hakai is in a state of shock for a moment before fully realizing his brother was dead. "You bastard!"

Ojike quickly darts to get the head of his brother hopeful to reattach it to his body. Sesshomaru does not give him the chance. He strikes out with his whip cutting Hakai from head to toe. Hakai stands in place for an instant then tumbles down into two piles. Avalon frees herself from Ojike's arms. When Sesshomaru turns and sees Avalon's terror strained face and disheveled appearance he lashes out one last time with his whip destroying Ojike's body.

Avalon seeing everything is over, starts to collapse. Sesshomaru moves on instinct to stop her descent, catching her. Without thinking Avalon wraps her arms around him and pulls herself closer to him. Jaken seeing her taking liberties with his Lord is about to protest when he watches as Sesshomaru wraps his arms tighter around her small frame. He can barely stutter seeing his Lord acting so oddly. Jaken becomes suspicious, 'perhaps Avalon is bewitching Sesshomaru-sama.' Sesshomaru can feel her body trembling in his embrace and smells her tears. He finds himself wishing to comfort her further but doesn't know how, so he allows the embrace to continue until Avalon pulls her face from his chest. She looks up at him with puffy and watery eyes. "Thank you my Lord."

Sesshomaru unwraps his arms from her and helps Avalon to stand as he is getting up. She wipes her tears away with her sleeve.

"Come." Sesshomaru leads the way.

They come across a small creek and Avalon calls out. "Please wait a moment?"

Without even checking if Sesshomaru has stopped, she goes to the water and rinses away the dry tears from her face and the blood from her blade and hands. She dries the blade and her face and quickly goes to rejoin the group. Sesshomaru had stopped, he knew it would not be a long stop. He figures she would do just what she did. Once Avalon rejoins the group Sesshomaru says, "let's go."

They continue their journey as the sun makes its way across the sky. As the sun is lingering on the horizon Sesshomaru brings the group to a halt. "We will camp here." With that said, he walks over to a tree and gracefully sits down.

Even though it isn't that warm, the journey was still hard on Avalon and she feels hot, tired and sweaty, in other words gross. She approaches Sesshomaru and looks down where he sits. "Lord Sesshomaru, is there somewhere I can bathe?"

Sesshomaru raises his eyebrow at the request as he wonders why she wants to bathe so soon, when he knows most ningen do not bathe regularly. He takes a gentle and covert sniff and finds her scent is not unpleasant though there are traces of sweat on her person.

Avalon continues to speak, "I am sure I don't smell all that pleasant to you. Even I can smell myself."

'She can smell that small amount of sweat?' He is slightly amused at the asinine concept of bathing so regularly but then remembers back to when he had first scented her and that she did not have any body odor on her other that the man's scent and blood. "Jaken build a fire and find something for the ningen to eat."

"Yes my Lord."

"Come."

Avalon follows Sesshomaru in silence as she sees the last rays of sunlight fading and the darkness enveloping the world. They come to a small spring in a thicket of trees. Avalon's eyes light up when she sees how serene and perfect it looks. She can't help but think it looks like something out of a fairytale. "Thank you my Lord. I just wish I had a separate kimono."

Sesshomaru moves away from the water to allow Avalon to gain entrance but turns to watch her. She turns and sees him watching her and hesitates. 'Is he just going to watch?' She pulls her katana from her obi and places it leaning against a tree right at the entrance of the water. She starts to undo her obi, slowly placing it on a branch near the water. 'Come on take the hint, turn around.' Sesshomaru continues to watch her without saying a word and without an emotion crossing his face. Avalon realizes he will be watching her the entire time and resigns herself to her fate as she continues to undress herself. She pulls the kimono off and gives it a delicate sniff and exclaims, "ewww." She pulls off the nagajuban and doesn't even bother smelling it, she knows it stinks.

"Wash your kimono if you please. This Sesshomaru will lend you mine."

"Oh, thank you so much Lord Sesshomaru!" Avalon looks at him with a smile and grabs both the kimono and nagajuban and enters the water. It's cool but not nearly as cold as the stream. She notices Sesshomaru moving. She turns and sees him removing his katana and placing it next to hers. He removes his pelt and lays it over a branch and then pulls off his obi. She watches as he pulls his kimono off and then his hanjuban. "Uh what are you doing?"

'So she has realized I will be joining her. I need not explain myself to her.' Sesshomaru simply continues to look at her as he removes his boots and hakama.

Avalon finds her eyes roving over his exposed body. She could not help but see the broad shoulders and chiseled chest and muscular abs. Her eyes rake over his features traveling further down. They move below his waist and sees his large member resting down and flaccid. 'He's got to be huge when he is erect.' She feels warmth pool between her legs and realizes she is becoming aroused by his naked presence. 'I haven't felt like this since Brandon assaulted me.' She suddenly turns around and tries to clear her mind of the treacherous thoughts of how their bodies would fit together. 'I'm a woman and he is most definitely male, it is only natural to feel such things.' she nods her head once she draws the conclusion and focuses on her task of cleaning her clothes in the water.

Sesshomaru knows she is admiring his body and can smell her sweet scent of arousal. He figures he might be getting more than a simple bath, however as soon as that thought crosses his mind, she suddenly turns and the scent fades away. He finds himself disappointed. Sesshomaru enters the water and Avalon can feel the ripples breaking over her back. She focuses on cleaning her kimono and nagajuban and once they are scrubbed, she turns and meets Sesshomaru's eyes. She gives a polite smile and wades through the water to the shore and places the kimono and juban over a branch to dry. She enters the water and starts to scrub her body. Sesshomaru watches her and finds her movement seductive and arousing. She gently caresses her curves and brings water to slide along her body. His member hardens and pulses with the thoughts of sheathing himself in her warm folds.

Avalon finishes her bath and heads back out of the water. She stands and lets the water drip off her body and rings her hair out. Sesshomaru never stops watching her with a predatory look in his eyes. His mind keeps playing out sexual encounters. His face is a neutral mask however. He exits the water himself with his member painfully hard and wanting relief. He feels she's a temptress with the way she moves her body and wants to claim her body for the night for his own pleasure. Avalon notices Sesshomaru exiting the water and the thing that stands out the most is his erect manhood. She quickly turns her gaze to the drying kimono and juban. "Why do you look away?"

"Honestly?" She turns to meet his eyes keeping her gaze on his face. "I don't know how to react. How should I react?"

'Was she that inexperienced?' "From what this Sesshomaru have seen, onna throw themselves at me and want me to take them."

"Yokai or ningen?"

"Both."

"Hmm, well then I guess you might be disappointed when I don't."

Sesshomaru is shocked that she would deny him. He sees no reason to delay copulation. She is old enough and is no virgin. He gazes at her studying her trying to see if she has spoken the truth. He cannot smell any hit of arousal on her and she seems to be completely in control of her faculties and not a hint of a lie. "This Sesshomaru could smell your arousal when you looked upon my form."

"Well, you are attractive. I will not lie about that and arousal is natural."

Sesshomaru is pleased with her words and thinks she should be grateful that he would allow her to have the pleasure of his body tonight. "So you do want this Sesshomaru."

Avalon's heart rate skyrockets as her right hand moves to clutch at her chest. He is stating it and she is concerned he might try to force her. She looks into his eyes and face desperately trying to ascertain the meaning behind his words. Is it only a true statement and nothing more or is she sensing danger because she really is in danger. She would rather die than have him violate her. She had developed a trust in him that she could not bear for it to be broken.

Sesshomaru doesn't move. He only looks at her with a neutral expression waiting for her to react to his invitation.

"Just because a flower is beautiful does not mean I must own it or touch it, sometimes looking is sufficient." She hopes that he can understand the meaning of her words since she really isn't ready for any type of sexual activity.

Sesshomaru quickly grasps her meaning and takes it as a challenge to see how long it will take for her to want to touch and want to have him but he will not force her. That is not honorable and most definitely beneath him. "This Sesshomaru is not disappointed."

She nods her head not completely sure what he means by that but watches as he approaches her. She feels the adrenaline burn away as hope dies. She knows she cannot fight him and she cannot run from him. However as he comes closer she takes a step back and accidentally slips on the damp ground. Sesshomaru catches her and pull her into his body. He can hear her heart pounding in her chest and small the bitter scent of fear. She looks at him with an almost hopeless look as her mouth is partially parted in fear. He finally comes to the reason behind her odd behaviors she fears he may take her without her consent. Looking her in the eyes with a predatory gleam he speaks, "Do you fear this One with force himself upon you?"

Avalon's lip trembles as she stutters out, "I I I…"

Sesshomaru reaches out and places one of his fingers on her trembling lip. "onna this Sesshomaru would not force himself on you."

He steadies her releasing her arm and walks past her and reaches for his hakama and puts them on. Her heart slows and she releases a breath she didn't even realize she was holding. He grabs his kimono and tosses it over to her. She wraps it around her body and finds she is finally able to relax. Sesshomaru puts on his boots and hanjuban and obi. She moves to put on her obi to hold his kimono in place. Sesshomaru picks up both blades and hands Avalon hers.

"Thank you."

He grabs his armor and pelt and starts to walk away.

"We are returning to camp."

"Hai." Avalon quickly grabs her drying clothes and rushes to follow Sesshomaru back to camp. Once there, Sesshomaru leans his armor beside a tree and places his pelt over a branch. He gracefully sits under the tree and leans back and closes his eyes.

Avalon places her wet clothing on another tree close to the fire Jaken had started. She looks around camp and doesn't see him anywhere. 'I wonder where he is?' She looks around and spots a pile of roots by the fire. 'I wonder if I can just eat those or if they have to be cooked.'

Sesshomaru idly wonders how hard it will be to bed Avalon.

Avalon goes over by Sesshomaru and asks, "Do you know if I can eat these roots raw or do they need to be cooked?"

"Ask Jaken when he returns."

Avalon looks away with a light sigh. "Very well my Lord." 'Guess I'll just have to wait.' Avalon walks away to wait by the fire and sits.

Jaken comes back later with several small lizards in hand. "Oh master Jaken, thank you for bringing the food. Do I need to cook these roots or can I eat them raw?"

"They need to be cooked Baka."

"BAKA, BAKA, BAKA!" Avalon jumps up and quickly stalks over to Sesshomaru and has a seat next to him so she can whisper quietly to him. "Lord Sesshomaru, what would you think of me if I were to beat your vassal?"

Sesshomaru opens his eyes and looks over at Avalon and ponders her query. He leans over and speaks softly in her ear. "Do as you please with him but do not kill him. His life is mine."

Avalon feels his breath ghost over her ear and shoulder and she shudders at the feel. She's not afraid and feels her lower abdomen tense with slight pressure and the image of his nude body springs to the front of her mind. She closes her eyes unintentionally and tries to calm the sudden arousal flooding through her body. She opens her eyes and sees Jaken looking at them strangely.

Sesshomaru smells her arousal and wonders what has caused it. He slightly smirks when he realizes it is most likely his breath cascading along her body causing the reaction.

"Could he hear us?"

Sesshomaru grasps the chance to test his theory by breathing a little heavier on her and closer along her neck, whispering, "no."

Avalon's body reacts in much the same way but it's more intense and she can feel herself becoming wet between her thighs.

Sesshomaru is enjoying her reaction to his hot breath and wonders if it will be easier than he had first thought to bed the woman. He can smell the sweet scent of her juices pooling between her legs and wants to plunge himself into her. His manhood is erect and throbbing wanting to be used.

She closes her eyes and finds she wants his lip where his breath was ghosting along her flesh. She shakes her head trying to dislodge the lecherous thoughts. "You are enjoying this?"

He leans closer to her and even allows his shoulder to press onto her side and breathes her heavenly scent in. Feeling no need to lie he answers with a smirk on his face, "Yes, quite entertaining."

She takes a deep breath and tries to regain control of her wanton lust reasoning this was not the right time or place. She can barely contain her desires and wants to flee from his side but queries one last thing and whispers. "I know you can smell me but can Jaken?"

Sesshomaru brings his nose along her chin under her jaw and whispers to her, "no. That has been my pleasure alone."

It's too much for her body and brain and she wants to get away before she does something she will regret. She turns her head to him and whispers in his ear, "thank you for this pleasant conversation Lord Sesshomaru." With that said she quickly extracts herself from his side and stands up and walks over to Jaken. Part of her didn't want to go but a larger part knew she had to. It was all too much, all too quickly.

Sesshomaru feels his erection twitching in between his legs. He would bury himself within her folds and sate his lust. He figures it is only a matter of time.

She speaks loudly with a commanding voice, "Jaken do you have nothing better to do than stare at your Lord? I do believe he said something about making food for me."

Jaken jumps at her sudden change of voice as it rings with an air of authority. Sesshomaru wonders how she will use her new found power. Jaken still has not responded so she continued, "Are you deaf? Why are you not working on cooking the food?"

Jaken starts scurrying around the camp skinning the roots and skewering the lizards. He cuts the roots and skewers them and places them around the fire. Avalon then sits over by Sesshomaru and watches as Jaken works. She looks over at Sesshomaru and all she can see is a stoic look on his face as he gazes into the sky. Part of her is disappointed. She rather liked the heated look in his eyes, it made him seem alive while now he might be mistaken for a statue if he were not breathing.

Sesshomaru smells that her arousal is gone and he focuses himself on controlling his body. He can hear his vassal moving about. He opens his eyes to look over at Avalon and then closes them once again.

Avalon has several thoughts on her mind the most pressing one being that she needs to talk to him to make sure he will not share with anyone that she knows bits of the future. She can see Naraku trying to extract information from her if he thought she would talk. It sent a shiver down her spine just thinking of that evil being. Avalon gets up and walks over to the fire to help warm herself. She glances down at Jaken as he is resting by the fire, watching the food cook. "Jaken how long until the food is ready to eat?"

Jaken turns and looks up at Avalon and then a sudden realization hits him. He has been following her orders, not his Lord's. "Now ningen stop that! You cannot tell me what to do."

Sesshomaru's attention is drawn to his retainer with his outburst and wonders how Avalon will deal with it. 'Violence, this shall be entertaining.'

"I wasn't, I only wanted to know when it would be done." 'True that was not a command.'

"You must call me Master Jaken."

"I think we already had this discussion and you broke our deal."

"A deal with a ningen is meaningless."

Sesshomaru becomes very aggravated with his retainer since a deal is a deal whether with a ningen or not. He intends to correct him.

"No it just means the yokai had no honor or no brains. Which are you?" 'Both'

"Neither."

"Then I will simply no longer call you Master but I will call you Jaken and you can call me Avalon."

"No"

"Why not?"

"Because you stupid girl, I am Master Jaken and you are a simple ningen."

"What makes you my Master?"

"Because I am a yokai and you are a ningen."

"AND?!"

"Yokai are above ningen." 'True none could disagree. We have the strength to surpass them so we are above them.'

"Interesting theory Jaken but that seems too broad a scope. If I killed a yokai would you kill me?"

"Depends."

"On?"

"Why? Who it was of course." 'Of course it would all depend on which yokai she killed.'

"So not all yokai are above ningen? Otherwise I should be killed no matter what yokai I killed."

'That is an interesting point and a valid one perhaps yokai in general are not above ningen. But I Sesshomaru am most definitely above all ningen. But is Jaken above her? Hmmmm. He cannot overwhelm her. Yes he could kill her with his staff but without it she could easily kill him. In this case if it was only a matter of strength than she is above Jaken.'

"That's not how it works."

"I see, so why won't you follow my orders?"

"Because I am Lord Sesshomaru's vassal."

"Interesting but since I follow Lord Sesshomaru and my current orders are not interfering with what Lord Sesshomaru wishes, why won't you follow my orders?"

Sesshomaru is enjoying the philosophical conversation she is having with his vassal and is enjoying how she can cleverly counter his points and work things to her benefit. Jaken is becoming frustrated with the whole thing while Avalon seems to be enjoying herself.

She feels like bursting out laughing at him.

"Just shut up ningen."

"Jaken ouch that hurts."

"SHUT UP!"

"Hmmmm, now that just seems childish. You never answered me. When will the food be done?"

Jaken let out a sigh. "The lizard is done and the roots will be soon."

"Thank you Jaken."

Jaken looks over at Avalon with a surprised look on his face. He had assumed the argument would continue. Avalon reaches over and grabs a skewer of the lizard and walks over to Sesshomaru. "You want any my Lord?"

"I don't eat ningen food."

"As you wish."

She peels away the outer skin and grabs a small chunk of meat and pops it in her mouth. "Not bad Jaken."

"It's Master Jaken."

Jaken sulks by the fire but says nothing more. Avalon finishes her lizard and once the roots are done she eats some as well. Jaken eventually falls asleep and Avalon pokes the fire. She's not tired, at least not in the sense of being sleepy and really wants to talk to Sesshomaru without Jaken as an audience. Once she is sure Jaken is out cold snoring she gets up and walks over to Sesshomaru and sits next to him.

"Can I ask you a favor?"

Sesshomaru looks over to her and wonders what she could be wanting. "Hmm?"

"When I ask you a question can you always answer me honestly? If you don't know the answer then just let me know that you don't know the answer."

"That is a dangerous request."

"I know."

"Will you grant this Sesshomaru the same?"

"Honestly I cannot."

"Why?"

"Hmmm, as things play out, the future changes. So what I know now, may not come to pass as I know it. If that makes any sense at all."

"It does."

"I can guarantee you one thing though, I will never lie to you and I want you to understand I only want for you to be the greatest yokai to ever live. I will dedicate myself to help you achieve that. I see you surpassing your sire one day and I can only hope I can bear witness to that."

"Why would a ningen care for such things?"

"I cannot answer that since I am not entirely sure of the answer myself. Lord Sesshomaru, please never speak of me knowing the future to anyone not even Jaken."

"This Sesshomaru has no intention of doing such. If you truly know such things, it is a weapon this Sesshomaru alone will wield. It would be foolhardy to allow others to know."

"I am glad we are in agreement. Uh since we are agreeing on things would you mind doing one more thing for me?"

"What is it that you request of this Sesshomaru?"

"I know you are above me and you are my Lord but can you please stop being so formal with me at least in private?"

"This I can do."

Avalon gives him a radiant smile. "Uh you never actually answered my first question."

"I will grant you the same as you grant me. I will not lie but there may be times that I will not answer you."

Avalon nods her head in understanding and closes her eyes and opens them again.

"When will we be arriving at our destination?"

"If we leave around sunrise we will arrive around midafternoon."

"Well then I think I should get some sleep, if that is alright?"

"Do as you will."

"Good night Sesshomaru."

Sesshomaru is unsure how he feels about Avalon dropping his title but thinks it is not that concerning as long as it is in private. Avalon nestles down closer to Sesshomaru but still between him and the fire. She figures it will be easier for him to cover her if she is closer.

Sesshomaru glances down at the woman lying at his feet and hears her even breathing letting him know she has drifted off into unconsciousness and still wonders how she can sleep so soundly before returning his eyes to the night sky and allowing his mind to drift while his senses range out to make sure nothing will attack while Avalon and Jaken sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment or kudo!


	6. Finding Inuyasha

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon faces a deadly encounter with Sesshomaru while trying to free Inuyasha from the tree where he has been sealed.

Avalon wakes suddenly, heart racing and covered in sweat. She shoots up and runs. Sesshomaru is startled by her sudden bolting. He reacts quickly, intercepting her. She runs right into him falling backwards from the sudden impact. He reaches out to grab her before she falls and grabs her arm. Avalon screams at the top of her lungs and claws at his fingers with her free hand, trying to pry them off.

Sesshomaru roars, "onna control yourself!"

Avalon continues to pry at his fingers. She jumps and attempts to kick him with both her legs but finds him immovable. She strains her legs pushing with all her might while screaming, "let me go!" in English.

Sesshomaru is confused by what she is saying. It makes no sense but with her constant struggles, he lets her drop. Avalon falls on her back but quickly turns over and attempts to bolt again but Sesshomaru moves quicker and grabs her around her waist and hoists her up to settle her against his chest. She launches her head back and hits him in the nose.

His eyes bleed red and he roars in her ear, "AVALON!"

Blinking, she comes back to herself and realises that she is in Sesshomaru's arms and she can feel the angry aura he is emanating. Her sea-green eyes widen as she thinks he is going to kill her. She drops her head and apologizes, "I am so sorry." She can feel herself breaking. The mask cracks and it all comes crashing back. Her eyes blur as tears start to seep forth. Her body starts to shake and she goes limp in his grasp. The tears fall without any sound other than her breathing. She sniffles trying to put herself back together. Sesshomaru continues to hold her without saying a word for some time trying to decide the best way to go about asking her what is wrong. After much thought and with her body shaking less he asks, "Tell me what disturbed you?"

Avalon inhales deeply trying to settle herself at least enough to talk. "I had a nightmare about my past when I was raped."

"Why react with fear he is dead?"

"I wasn't, not to him. I don't know how to explain it. I...hmmmm I don't fear him. He is dead but it felt like I was back there and I couldn't see that it was you. I just wanted to get away. I'm sorry, I'm not describing this very well. Can you please release me? I won't run now."

Sesshomaru releases her and she stands on her own for a moment then collapses. Sesshomaru is unable to stop her descent as he was not expecting it. He looks down at her with his eyebrow raised. She looks up once she has gotten on her hands and knees.

"What? My legs are killing me. We've been walking for days and that run didn't help." All the while she is too embarrassed to let him know where she has been hurting the most, the burning and swelling is nearly unbearable in between her legs.

Sesshomaru looking down reaches to help her stand once again. Making sure she is stable he leads them back. All the while Avalon is trying to hide her pain. Even as Sesshomaru can smell a hint of blood coming from her, he cannot place where she is bleeding from.

Sesshomaru starts walking away so she follows him back to camp. Once they reach camp Avalon looks to the sky and sees that it is still dark. He settles himself against the tree he was resting against before.

Avalon moves over to be closer to him and sits next to him leaning against the same tree. She is watching the sky as the deep black slowly started to lighten and turns to purple, then purple shifting to deep blue and then the rays of the sun breach the horizon as oranges and reds start to streak the sky. She gazes at the sky in wonder and thinks it's beautiful.

Sesshomaru finds himself content with her by his side and wonders why?

Avalon looks over and sees Sesshomaru watching her. She assumed he would watch the sky with her. She shrugs and gets up, feeling that it's about time to eat and get going. She walks over to the fire and grabs some of the remaining roots and starts to eat them, the whole time pondering how patient Sesshomaru will be with her if Inuyasha is still sealed to the tree and wondering if that is the case, how long until Kagome will come to free him from his seal?

Sesshomaru watches her and finds that she was paying little attention to her surroundings and wonders what she could be thinking of.

"So should I wake Jaken?"

"Hn," Sesshomaru did not care one way or the other.

"So is that a yes? A no,? Or an, 'I will not answer you'?"

"This Sesshomaru does not answer to you."

Avalon feels herself bristle. 'So arrogant.' "No, he certainly does not."

'Did she dare to dismiss me!'

Avalon shakes her head and starts to walk into the woods. She figures she can find the berries that Jaken had shown her and stops when Sesshomaru appears right in front of her in a flash. "Where are you going?"

"I was going to look for some berries to eat. I would ask Jaken to join me but since you will not answer if you want me to wake him or not, I won't. So, I will search for them alone, unless you wish to join me?" she gives him a sly smile finishing her sentences.

Sesshomaru wonders at the meaning of her smile. He nods his head.

She goes and walks around him, noticing he is following her. She searches the lower brush looking for berries and spots what she is looking for. "So Sesshomaru, should I offer you food or just not bother?"

"I do not require ningen food."

"I know you don't, but that doesn't make me feel any less rude eating in front of you and not offering. So should I just not offer?"

"It is unnecessary."

She shrugs her shoulders.

"Very well."

She eats her fill of the berries and grabs a large leaf and starts to collect a good portion for Jaken and then takes off her bundle from her hip and opens it and starts to fill the shirt as well. Rolling it back up and tying it back on herself. She starts heading back the way they came or at least the way she thinks they came. Sesshomaru grabs her right hand and spins her to him. "Are you searching for more berries?"

Her cheeks turn a slight pink as he continues to hold her hand.

"Uh ie?"

"Then perhaps you are wanting more time alone with me?"

"Uh…" She looks up into his eyes and sees the heated gaze from last night and finds herself clenching her legs together. She looks down to her left and states, "ie. Don't be silly I was trying to get back to camp."

He grabs her shoulders and turns her to the right and gets behind her and gives her a slight push forward. "This way."

She lurches forward but catches her footing and starts walking, feeling like she is going the wrong way. She keeps moving forward for some time but something still nags at the back of her mind that it is the wrong way. She glances behind her and sees a slight smirk on his face. Amusement dances behind his eyes. "Sesshomaru why do I feel like we are heading in the wrong direction?"

Sesshomaru realizes he is caught enjoying the view of her backside. "I did not say this was the way to camp."

"But you pushed me and said, 'this way'."

He nods.

She quickly catches on that he had prolonged their walk intentionally. Her cheeks go red and she puts her hands on her hips. "I...you. AHHH!" She tosses her hands up and lets them drop down and turns back around to where she feels camp should be.

He's surprised she caught on so quickly and recovered the correct heading, he can't help but be a little impressed by it. Most ningen, especially onna would be helplessly lost. After a little while they make it back to camp and Jaken is still asleep. She soundlessly walks over to him and pulls out the leaf full of berries and sets it down beside him. She walks over to her drying clothing and removes her bundle and sets it down. She grabs her clothing and is pleased to find them dry. She pulls them down and walks over to the woods and steps behind the trees. She can feel Sesshomaru's hands already pulling on her obi. She goes to grab it but then stops herself. What does it matter? She needs his help dressing anyway. He slips her katana from her obi and places it in his obi. His hands nimbly unwrap her obi and place it on a branch. He pulls his kimono from her form. She shivers at the way his hands move delicately along her body. He places his kimono next to her obi. She hands him both the kimono and nagajuban and ties. He puts on the nagajuban smoothing it along her body. She closes her eyes and tries to ignore the way his hands are moving sensually along her form. She can feel herself getting wet but doesn't make any move.

He ties the bands around her and moves to put on the kimono again moving much slower than necessary enjoying the way her body is reacting to his touch. He prolongs smoothing the kimono to allow his hands to trail over her body multiple times. He finally moves to tie her obi since there's nothing left for him to do. He pulls her katana from his obi and slides it in, along her hip. Avalon quietly speaks just above a whisper. "Thank you Sesshomaru."

She steps away from him trying to preserve her dignity and keep her head straight. Sesshomaru remains where he is, feeling his cock twitch and wanting satisfaction. He ponders why he doesn't just find another female to satiate his desire but he only wants her. He concludes with credulity the he just wants what he wants and that is all there is to it. He quickly puts on his kimono and walks to follow her. He steps out from the trees right behind her and goes to grab his armor and pelt.

Avalon is watching him and sees him about to put his sword on the ground. "You know I could hold your sword while you changed if you would like?"

'Why would she want my sword? Does she intend to betray me?' He stops and narrows his eyes at her.

She feels fear creep into her being, it is a dangerous look. "I know Tenseiga cannot cut and I have no intentions of running away from you."

His eyes widen a hair. 'How would she know the name of my blade and its ineffectiveness? What else does she know of my blade?' "What do you know of Tenseiga?"

"I know its name and that it cannot cut."

"How do you know its name?"

"The same way I knew your name."

"You will tell me more."

"Hmm, Sesshomaru what more do you want to know about your sword?"

"Everything."

Avalon considers, 'well if I refuse he isn't going to be happy'. "Tenseiga is the sword that cannot kill things of this world, the Sword of Heaven. It can revive the dead. It is rumored to be able to bring 100 people back from the dead in one stroke. When you choose to use it on the dead you can see the pole bearers of the dead pulling the soul and you can strike them down, reviving the person and healing their wounds. The sword was left to you by your late father Toga, Inu no Taisho. You do not know why your father left the sword to you as you do not see the sword being useful since it cannot kill. Yet you keep it nonetheless. My guess is that you respect him and wish to keep it as a memento. Does that sufficiently answer your question? Or have I forgotten something?"

Sesshomaru presses the sword into her hands. "Here." He unties his obi and puts on his kimono properly, then his armor and pelt and re-ties the obi.

"Would you mind if I wake Jaken now so he can eat and we can get going?"

"Do as you please."

She walks over to Jaken and yells, "JAKEN, GET UP!"

Jaken jumps awake and looks around, meeting Avalon's eyes with a glare. "Look ningen, I don't answer to you."

"My name is AVALON. Av-a-lon not ningen. Now get up Jaken and eat. We are moving out shortly."

"I do not answer to you."

"Then we will leave you behind and you can catch up. I won't waste my time."

"Lord Sesshomaru shall I teach this wench her place?"

"It's not wench either."

"You will not harm her Jaken."

"Wha...wha...wha...yes my Lord."

Avalon pities the poor imp. He has been demoted in a sense. She can do as she pleases and he can't defend himself. Jaken looks to his side and spots the berries she had gathered for him. He eats them but doesn't thank her.

She doesn't expect a thank you but it would have been nice. Looking down at her right hand she realizes that she is still holding Tenseiga. She walks over to him and hands him his sword. He slides it into his obi. Jaken catches the exchange and stops eating his berries with mouth gaping then looks away and swallows. He can't eat anymore, his stomach is aching and he is sure Sesshomaru-sama has been bewitched by Avalon.

Avalon notices that Jaken had stopped eating. 'Hmm I wonder what is up with him?' Avalon walks over to where she left her little bundle and wraps it around her waist. Sesshomaru sees Avalon is ready and speaks, "Jaken put out the fire we are leaving."

"Hai my Lord."

Jaken quickly puts out the fire and hurries to get behind Sesshomaru and Avalon. Sesshomaru starts to walk away with Avalon and Jaken in tow. She watches as the scenery goes by and she follows silently behind Sesshomaru staying close to his back with Jaken following behind. Avalon can feel the glare of the little imp on her back as they walk but she ignores it and focuses on everything else. It's wonderful how the air is so clean and the sun shines on them as clouds drift over periodically. She cannot remember the air ever being so fresh. After traveling for hours she glances to her left and gasps as she sees a tall tree that is so familiar to her and speaks softly, "Goshinboku."

Sesshomaru, hearing her quiet uttering turns his suspicious glance over her way.

She sees his head turn from the corner of her eye and says, "What did you expect? I wouldn't know the tree?"

He looks away and continues to lead them to the tree. She sees Inuyasha pierced by the arrow sealing him to the tree. She thinks he looks like he is simply sleeping in peace. "Lord Sesshomaru I am going to approach him. If the villagers try to stop me or take me captive please do not kill them. They do not know what danger they are putting themselves in and I am sure I will be fine."

Avalon steps up to the tree and climbs the thick vines and roots to reach Inuyasha. She is standing in front of him and realizes he is the same height as her, minus the ears. Seeing those fluffy soft looking ears, she finds she really wants to touch them. She debates if she should or shouldn't, but her curiosity wins out. She reaches her hands and gently brushes her fingers along the outside of his ears. She is happy to find that they are super soft.

Sesshomaru seeing this feels slightly angered by it, but not sure why. He speaks with a harsh tone, "Onna, what are you doing?"

Avalon cringes at the tone and answers, "honestly satisfying my curiosity."

Sesshomaru feels like rolling his eyes if the act were not beneath him.

'Now the really important thing can I pull this arrow out?' She figures she can't but wants to try. She grabs the arrow and attempts to pull it from his chest. She feels like she is trying to pull on hardened steel.

"Again what are you doing?"

"Ah, that I have a better answer for. I am attempting to unseal Inuyasha obviously..." Before she can finish speaking Sesshomaru is by her side with a deadly look on his face. She finds herself swallowing her words.

Sesshomaru is beyond livid. Was she insane? "Why would you unseal the hanyou?" he is nearly snarling the words in her ear.

"Well if you would have let me finish the reason is that we need him to reach you father's tomb."

Sesshomaru lashes out and smacks Avalon in the chest, sending her flying. She hits the ground hard, sprawled on her back and before she can even react Sesshomaru is above her with his hand on her throat. 'I would have no need of a hanyou to reach my father's tomb. There is more to this. Perhaps she wants his protection instead of mine. He was half ningen after all.' "This Sesshomaru has no need for that hanyou."

Avalon's gaze hardens with unflinching determination. She knows this is the closest she has come to him ripping her throat out. But if she shows the slightest bit of fear she would sign her death certificate.

Sesshomaru notes that he cannot detect any hint of fear, 'she is either very brave or very stupid.'

"Unless Inuyasha can be unsealed you cannot reach your father's tomb. End of story. There is no other way. We need Inuyasha free from his prison."

Sesshomaru is enraged at her defiance. Even though he has her by the throat, she still insists on freeing the half breed. Sesshomaru pushes his hand harder against her throat.

Avalon gasps and struggles to speak but gets out, "Why would I lie? What benefit would I receive from freeing Inuyasha? You are the stronger one by far. There is nothing that hanyou could offer me."

"Why would you choose a youkai? Inuyasha is part ningen?"

"Why wouldn't I choose you? I truly admire you. You have such control and power. None can truly stand in your way especially when you surpass your father which I know you will."

"You mock me."

Her eyes widen in fear. "Never."

Sesshomaru tightens his grip on her neck. "Then why ask my protection? It's obvious you don't belong here. You're hair?" He reaches down and grasps strands of her black hair. "Your eyes, they are unlike any ningen I have ever seen. Do you expect him to lead you home?"

"You are right. I am not from here. I have no idea how to get home. I don't expect anyone to lead me home, least of all him."

"Where is home?"

"Across the Sea"

"Which sea?"

"I know it as the Atlantic but you may know it by a different name."

"Where?" He tightens his grasp around her neck before pulling her head forward and slamming it back down into the ground.

"Please Lord Sesshomaru?" She grasps at the hand holding her throat. "I can't breath."

"Then speak quickly"

"It's west, far west of here."

He watches her face change colors, "such a pity. And I thought you could be useful. Far west is a direction, not a place."

Jaken comes from behind looking at her face. "Eh, Sesshomaru-sama? I think you are going to kill her!"

"Then I'll revive her and do it again."

"No, North America."

He loosens his grip enough to let her suck in air. "How did you come here? Your accent is imperfect."

Avalon gasps in a long needed breath and speaks, "it was a portal"

"Who created it."

Her lip starts to tremble. This is what she was worried about. She didn't have the answer and she knew he would not like it. "I...I don't know, please don't kill me." She closes her eyes tightly and waits for his judgement.

He snarls and lowers his lips next to her ear, "if this answer displeases this Sesshomaru," he tightens his grip until he can smell her fear and the first bone in her neck pops. "I will kill you. Why remain here?"

"My family is dead. I have nothing left for me where I am from. My life is meaningless there and here I think I can make a difference."

"So there is no one who will miss you if I kill you?" He releases his grip enough to allow her to breathe freer.

She answers somewhat bitterly "No."

"An Onna without her virginity has no value here. What have you to gain by staying by my side."

"What value would I have if I left your side? To become a whore?"

He snorts as he releases her throat. "If you think to betray this Sesshomaru. I will kill you."

Avalon's eyes harden with anger. Hadn't she just said she wanted to help him? "My Lord, I would never betray you. Do you think I am foolish enough to do that? I knew the bed I was getting into."

'An interesting choice of wording.' His pupils slightly widened. "Did you now?" He places his hand back on her throat to grasp it lightly. "You knew that this Sesshomaru could easily snap your neck," adding a little more pressure to emphasize it, pulling his hand from around her throat to brush a claw along her neck, "or use my claws to slice through that pretty little neck." He lets his hand slip to the ground to rest while he raises his other hand as it begins to glow an eerie green.

Avalon let's, "Dokkasou," slip from her lips in a whisper

"Hmm, you know of my poison claws?"

Avalon nods her head slowly but says nothing. Sesshomaru allows the green to fade away. The closeness of his body and every thing he is showing her makes Avalon's body react. She can't believe she is being turned on. 'What am I a masochist or something?' She can feel her body becoming at ease under his and finds warmth pooling between her legs and her body urging her to grind her hips against his leg that was between hers. 'God why am I reacting like this?'

Sesshomaru's pupils widen as the scent of her arousal enters his nose. He leans down and whispers in her ear, "you want this Sesshomaru now?" He is genuinely surprised by her sudden arousal but finds his body reacting to her scent. His member stands at attention.

"I…I…I think we should get back to the business at hand."

Even as she spoke those words her body urges her to push her core into him and it comes on so strong she can't resist. She thrusts her hips up to meet his leg and allows herself to slide up and down his leg. She can feel the wave of pleasure it causes within her loins.

In response he pushes his leg into her center and allows her to continue her actions. Even as her body urges her to keep going, her mind is screaming for her to stop. Sesshomaru can't believe his luck. She seems to be a most willing partner right now. He would sate his desire and then he can stop thinking of her in this way. Sesshomaru grabs her hips and guides her hips to slide along his leg.

'Shit this is no good! What is wrong with me? I have to stop myself!' Avalon tries to distract herself by looking away from the heated gaze of Sesshomaru but all she can see is the curtain of silver hair.

Sesshomaru finds himself wanting to claim her mouth, so he leans down and captures her lips. She willing returns his affection and as his tongue brushes along her bottom lip, she parts her lips to allow him entrance. He plunges in to explore the warm cavern and enjoys the taste of her. She moves her tongue to begin a dance with his and joins in the exploration. She feels his sharp fangs and brushes along them and continues feeling herself enjoy the exploration. Her arms move to wrap around Sesshomaru's neck bringing him closer to her. Her hands grab at his hair and flesh. She can't get enough of him.

Then they hear Jaken speak, "Sesshomaru-sama?"

With those words, it is as if the spell broke. Avalon stiffens under Sesshomaru's ministrations. Her hips still and her hands drop to her sides.

Sesshomaru growls into her mouth as she no longer is returning his advances. He parts himself from her lips. He's frustrated beyond measure. 'Why did he interrupt this Sesshomaru? I will teach him a lesson he will never forget.' Sesshomaru slowly removes himself from Avalon's body. He stands and looks to his retainer. He moves to him and kicks him.

Avalon hears the thud and turns her head, seeing Jaken flying to a nearby tree and hears the cracking of the wood as he collides with it. She flinches at the force Sesshomaru used. He speaks in a very cold, icy and deadly voice, "never disturb this Sesshomaru like that again"

"Aye Milord!" is Jaken's pathetic response as he collapses on the ground.

She moves to rise but she can feel the protest of her back and chest. He must have bruised her ribs and back. She knew the choice she had made and she knew that this abuse was a possibility. She looks over to her left and sees Inuyasha still pinned to the tree. Shaking her head, she groans at the pain in her neck reminding her of Sesshomaru's unyielding grip. She still can't figure out what had gotten into her. She sits up and holds her head breathing deeply, slowly trying to calm the racing thoughts within. When she feels herself finally relax she moves to stand resisting the urge to express her pain. Avalon walks over to Sesshomaru and speaks to him. "Lord Sesshomaru I need to go to the village and see the miko that resides there."

"Why?"

"For several reasons. One, to find out how long he has been pinned to the tree-"

"What would that matter?"

"Since I could not free him, that would mean we will have to wait until the one who can, does."

"We do not need him."

Avalon hesitates then speaks, "Well, we need something from him. If I tell you something, can you promise not to strike him down while he is bound to the tree?"

"I promise nothing that ensures that hanyou's life."

"Only while he is bound, I ask this after I do not care."

"You don't care for his life?"

"I don't think I have any right to interfere."

"What would you know about him?" Sesshomaru's suspicion peaks

" I know he is your younger half brother but you are loathed to admit it. I know he is bound here because he lost his heart to a miko and as much as I know of him, I do not actually know him."

"I will guarantee you nothing but your death if you withhold information from me. Shall we repeat the dance Avalon?" He reaches a hand out to her throat that is glowing menacingly green.

Avalon looks at him with defiance. "I promised I would never lie to you and I would not betray you. I never promised to tell you everything I know. But I will give you this, if you can touch him now I will tell you what we need from him."

Sesshomaru snorts as he walks past Avalon and effortlessly leaps to be in front of Inuyasha. He turns to smirk down at Avalon as she watches from the base of the tree. He puts his one hand toward Inuyasha glowing green. Avalon exclaims, "IE. Sesshomaru-sama you don't know what we need from him if you destroy it we're screwed."

"This Sesshomaru will take his chances." He places his hand closer to Inuyasha as Avalon looks on helplessly. When a light-pink bolt of energy sends Sesshomaru's hand flying backwards and burnt. "What is this?"

"I am guessing a barrier."

Sesshomaru jumps down in front of Avalon with his eyes glowing red, "You did this."

"Ie Sesshomaru-sama I would guess its the arrow protruding from his chest, the miko who sealed him must have sealed demons out as well."

Sesshomaru glowers at Avalon but doesn't say anything since he can detect no lie. Avalon losing her patients asks,"May I head to the village now?"

"I will accompany you."

With an exasperated sigh she exclaims, "Unnecessary, but as you wish. My Lord, since you will be coming with me, I ask that you promise not to kill anyone."

"Very well."

"Doumo Arigatou Gozaimasu"

Avalon bows her head knowing that the promise from him is beyond generous.

"Jaken please stay here and recover."

"Yeah sure," he says not even moving from his spot.

Avalon doubts he will be able to follow anyway. Sesshomaru must have really hurt him this time. She isn't exactly happy about it, but is grateful Jaken broke the mood for her. She did not like how she had lost control. She knew he was attractive, obviously. But this was way beyond a fangirl crush but what was it? She didn't know and figures she would put the thoughts to the back of her mind and deal with them later.

As they head towards the village they are met by men with bows and various farm tools raised to defend their town. When an elderly woman dressed in red and white comes from behind them, Avalon recognizes the woman as Kaede. The men start to call out, "Make way for Lady Kaede!"

"Make way."

She approaches steadily but wearily. Avalon can tell Sesshomaru's aura is making her nervous. She can't blame her. If he decided to attack, she doubted anyone could stand against him. As she comes to the front, Avalon hails,"Lady Kaede, just the miko I was looking for."

"Ye know me?"

"I know of you."

"Why associate with demons child?"

"That is none of your concern. I have only come to ask a few questions and we will be leaving."

"What would ye ask of me?"

"How long has the hanyou Inuyasha been pinned to the tree?"

"Why would ye wish to know?"

"Do you not sense the power of the demon who is beside me? Do you truly wish for us to linger? Please answer my question."

She gives Avalon a knowing look and considered her words, "49 summers"

"Arigato Lady Kaede. My next question is more of a favor I suppose but do you have any herbs for pain?"

Kaede examines Avalon and could see the bruising on her neck it looked quite painful.

"Aye, that I do please wait here."

"Hai, I will."

"Lady Kaede, should we trust these individuals?"

"Nay, however I do not think they mean us harm now, stay here but do not advance."

"Hai," all the men answer in a choirs

Lady Kaede walks away towards her horse and gets on it and rides to the village. Avalon and Sesshomaru wait in silence. Sesshomaru gets impatient with waiting and Avalon gets irritated because Sesshomaru insisted on coming. Lady Kaede finally returns with a small pouch. "In this pouch is a group of herbs ye can take a pinch and put it under ye tongue and suck on it or ye can brew it in a cup of tea."

Avalon takes the pouch Kaede hands her.

"Arigato Lady Kaede farwell."

Avalon turns to leave and Sesshomaru follows suit until Kaede calls to her again

"Child ye do not have to leave with that demon."

Avalon turns to look at her. "Lady Kaede, I appreciate your concern but it is my choice and I am choosing to leave with him. Good day." She turns and continues to walk away. She doesn't look back. She knows the choice she is making and she intends to stick to it. They continue to walk back into the forest where they left Jaken.

"Why did you not tell her to remove the seal?"

"She would not have tried and she could not even if she had. She does not have the ability."

"How will you know when the seal will be lifted?"

Avalon raises her eyebrow at his question. "You wish for me to give you a prophecy?"

"You say you are a soothsayer."

"Did I now? Very well, the sign will be when a mystical pink light covers the sky. It will occur during the day and none will miss it unless they are blind."

"What will the light be?"

"The shattering of the Shikon no Tama."

"That cannot be. The Shikon no Tama is no longer in this world."

"I promise it will return. Do you still doubt me Sesshomaru?"

"I do not know."

"Sesshomaru I wish to visit Totosai."

"You know Totosai?"

He had turned and was in front of her, stopping her in her tracks. He is looking in her face.

"I know of him. I know about him, but I have never met him."

"How do you know so much?"

"As I have said before, I know what I do and as such, I know some of your past and I know many of your associates. How many times will you be shocked when I say something that applies to you or something related to you?"

He looks away from her and starts to walk away. She follows as they make their way to Jaken. He is resting under a tree and starts to screech.

"Lord Sesshomaru it is grand to see you. Please never leave me behind again."

"Jaken I am afraid you will be left behind many more times but Lord Sesshomaru will always come back for you.

"Silence you!"

"It's not you either, it's Avalon!"

Jaken isn't in for much of a fight as he is still nursing the injuries that Sesshomaru had given him earlier. She looks to Sesshomaru and realizes that Jaken is still in no shape to travel. However she knows being so close to his brother would irritate him so she felt it was best to start traveling nonetheless. She looks over at Sesshomaru and speaks, "So shall we go?"

Sesshomaru nods his head and starts walking away. Avalon and Jaken join him as they start to make their way south-west.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and Kudo!
> 
> Humblehouseplant here is where I (Elohiniar) wrote bits and pieces of Sesshomaru.


	7. Off to Totosai's

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru has plans, but so do his enemies. He tries to seduce Avalon but then she is taken.

After an hour of traveling, Avalon can tell Jaken can't keep up anymore. He lags too far behind. "Lord Sesshomaru, are we near any water? I would really like to rest and bathe."

"There is a stream nearby, come."

Sesshomaru heads off to the right. Avalon and Jaken follow behind. She hears the water. "Jaken why don't you stay here, I'll be back shortly."

"Yeah," the poor guy does not have the heart to argue.

Avalon truly hopes he will be better in the morning. She continues to follow Sesshomaru to the stream. It looks beautiful to her. She sees the sunlight glistening off the surface and jogs to the water. As she passes Sesshomaru she calls back, "arigatou Sesshomaru-sama."

She feels it would be really nice to cool off and knows the water will soothe her aches. She doesn't like how she sweats and feels gross because of it. Once Avalon makes it to the water she pulls her katana from her obi and places it against a tree, stripping off her clothing. She steps in and feels the cool water rush over her feet and calves. As she goes deeper in she can feel the coolness start to soothe her aches. She keeps stepping deeper until her breasts slip below the water. She closes her eyes and dunks her head under. She holds her breath and lets the truth of where she is and what she has been doing slip away. She exhales slowly under the water letting the turmoil go. She lets her head rise above the water with her eyes closed and takes a much needed deep breath of fresh air and opens her eyes. She meets golden orbs. Sesshomaru has joined her in the water. She looks into his eyes unsure of what his motives are at the moment but she feels calm. She lifts her head and looks at the clear blue sky.

Sesshomaru reaches his hand around the back of her head and brings it back down to look into his eyes. He leans forward and brushes his lips against Avalon's. She kisses him back, liking the feel of his lips on hers. It feels natural to her. Sesshomaru's kiss becomes more insistent and she responds in kind. He brushes his tongue along her lips and she parts them to allow his entrance. Their tongues dance with one another. Without thinking she wraps her arms around Sesshomaru and pulls their bodies closer together. Her mind is in a happy daze. She isn't even thinking of the fact that she is naked and he probably is as well.

Sesshomaru's hand snakes down her back and grabs her lower thigh, trying to raise her leg to allow him to enter. Reality hits Avalon in an instant. She pushes herself away from Sesshomaru as images come flooding back to her of her rapes. She looks at Sesshomaru with horror filled eyes and whispers, "I can't."

Sesshomaru smells the bitter scent of fear on her, when before all he smelled was arousal. He is confused as to what had changed. Avalon quickly exits the water and reaches for her juban. She can feel the tears pricking at the sides of her eyes threatening to fall. She blinks to keep them back. Sesshomaru joins her in an instant, holding her with his arm wrapped around her chest under her breasts pulling her against his naked chest. She can feel his hard member against her back. He whispers in her ear, "you seemed most eager."

She responds disheartened, "kissing, holding, but not that. Please understand I can't."

Sesshomaru does not release her. He moves his right hand down her abdomen and brushes it along her hip, pushing his hand between her legs. He caresses her inner thigh, trying to coax her to spread her legs. He bends his head, kissing and nipping at her neck. He whispers into the side of her neck, "Why?"

She shivers involuntarily. "Please, stop Sesshomaru."

"Tell me why?"

"I..I...I can't while we are in this position."

Sesshomaru smelling that her fear has not diminished, even with his coaxing, finally relents. He slowly releases her, allowing her to grab her juban.

She slips it on and grabs a himo and uses it as a robe. She is too shaky from everything else and lets herself sit down. She takes several deep breaths trying to calm herself as Sesshomaru stands in front of her in all his naked glory. He looks down at her waiting for her answer. "Come sit with me and I will tell you."

Avalon feels intimidated by him standing naked in front of her. She hopes that he will put something on when he sits.

Sesshomaru grabs his hakama and slips them on and sits next to her.

She is grateful that he is now clothed at least. "I will try... It's difficult since... well... I am attracted to you Sesshomaru. But I'm not ready for sex. I enjoy when we kiss and when we are close. I feel myself being drawn to you. Do you know why I feel so drawn to you?"

With his head held high and puffed out chest says, "this Sesshomaru is flawless perfection." He notices that her scent no longer holds fear but anger. 'Why would she be angry'

Avalon nearly balks at his response. Her breath hitches and she wants to yell at him. She thought there might be pheromones at work or something along those lines but the arrogance of 'flawless perfect'? She closes her eyes and takes several breaths counting; 1, 1000, 2, 1000, 3, 1000, 4, 1000… till she gets to 10, 1000. By the time she is done she is calm enough to talk again.

"Look I was raped Sesshomaru. Fear courses through my veins and I don't see or feel you there I see him, so I do not want to and it would take a hell of a lot more time and coaxing to get me to be open to it." With a defeated sigh she confesses, "also when I was raped, I was injured down there and it hurts."

"Is that why I can smell blood on you?"

"Yeah."

"That I can help with."

"What do you mean?"

"Lay on your back."

"Excuse me?"

"I do not repeat myself."

"No, I mean what are you intending to do?"

"Trust me."

Avalon is still unsure of it, but lays on her back as Sesshomaru asked her. Sesshomaru leans over her and gentle pulls at her legs to part them.

Avalon's eyes widen in fear.

"I am looking at the injury."

Avalon nods and allows him to pull her legs apart. Sesshomaru moves to place himself between her legs. Sesshomaru brings his head closer to her womanhood. "Avalon close your eyes and trust me."

Avalon closes her eyes and trembles in a fear that she cannot shake.

Sesshomaru grasps her hips with his hands and places his mouth near her opening. He pushes his tongue into her.

When Avalon feels soft wet flesh enter her, her eyes snap open and she looks down and sees Sesshomaru's head between her legs. She feels a sudden burning sensation that is unlike any she has felt before. She goes to shoot up but Sesshomaru holds her in place, using his hands to push on the top of her pelvic bone.

He growls as she continues to struggle, trying to free herself. Even though Sesshomaru is penetrating her to heal the abrasions, he finds himself enjoying it as she tastes divine.

"Let me go, what the hell Sesshomaru? Let me go!"

He plunges his tongue into her core several more times penetrating her as far as he can licking her walls. Each time Avalon can feel the same burn until it finally stops. Avalon stills when Sesshomaru pulls his head away, releasing his hold and sitting up. He licks his lips savoring the taste. He can smell salt.

"What in the seven hells did you do?"

"I healed you. You should be grateful."

Avalon glares at Sesshomaru with tears in her eyes and fixes her juban back closed, crossing her arms over her chest. "Sesshomaru you can't do that. You can't just take someone like that."

"I did not. I healed you. Why are you crying?"

"I….. uh…" tears stream down her cheeks

"Avalon?"

Avalon looks down in shame. "The only sexual experiences I've had, have been forced on me. I was raped when I was 15 and you know of…." she trails off. She can't seem to finish talking. She feels like she can't breathe.

Sesshomaru is caught off guard. "You were taken twice against your will?"

Avalon nods her head.

Sesshomaru reaches out and holds her arm shaking it gently to get her attention. "Look at me."

Avalon looks at him with watery eyes.

"I will never force you but I would be happy to show you what it should be like."

Avalon whispers, "Sesshomaru...ie."

"The offer still stands."

Sesshomaru gets up and dresses quickly. Avalon is still sitting on the ground crying softly.

"Avalon it is time to go."

Avalon looks up, shaking her head.

Sesshomaru bends down to be at her level. "If we do not leave soon, it will be dark before we find Jaken, come." He holds his hand out for Avalon to take.

After several minutes of her refusing he gets up and goes to sit next to a nearby tree.

Avalon sits quietly, crying for some time before she can get herself to get up.

Sesshomaru comes over to help her dress.

Avalon is despondent as she follows Sesshomaru back.'What in the hell was he thinking? He tortures me, nearly killing me. All I'm doing is trying to help him. Then this "I healed you, you should be grateful." and then "...I would be happy to show you what it should be like." like I want that.' She shakes her head.

Looking around, she starts gathering branches as they walk. Jaken was still hurt and she can help him by gathering the wood. When they find Jaken, he is asleep laying against a tree. She sets to work arranging the wood. After she finishes she decides to climb a tree. She climbs as high as she can go and settles in a group of branches that make a nice cradle. She closes her eyes and relaxes as the wind gently rocks her. She feels her attention being drawn below her. She looks down and sees Sesshomaru below her sitting at the base. She looks back up and starts to run her fingers through her damp black tresses. 'I wish I had a comb. Hmm I have no money. I wonder if Mr. Puppy guard would get me one.' Looking down she speaks, "Lord Sesshomaru?"

He looks up to acknowledge her.

"Do you think I could get a comb for my hair?"

He nods his head in agreement.

"Arigato."

Avalon eventually falls asleep in the tree. Sesshomaru pushes out his yoki checking the surrounding area for threats, waking Avalon in the process. When he cannot find any he resolves to visit a nearby village. He gets up. "Jaken!"

"Hai, milord"

"Start the fire when the sun sets and watch Avalon. Make sure nothing happens to her. If something befalls her, you will suffer for it."

"Hai."

He quickly leaves the camp. Avalon sits quietly in the tree feeling his aura fade. 'Why do I even stay? I could leave, maybe find someone else to help me. Miroku is around somewhere. Then there are the demon slayers. I know they are in the mountains somewhere. There are options.' Avalon looks down and sees Jaken resting against a tree. 'I wonder if he is awake or if her went back to sleep?' Avalon climbs down the tree slowly and quietly. Once she reaches the bottom she steps on a twig that snaps. She holds her breath. Jaken doesn't stir, so she starts to sneak away towards the woods. Just as she is about to step into the woods she hears Jaken, "Onna, where are you going?"

"Who, me?"

"Hai, is there another onna here."

"Ha,ha I suppose not. I was just going to oshikko." (pee)

"Be quick about it. It will be dark soon."

"Hai I know Jaken, arigato."

Avalon steps further into the woods and keeps going back the way they came. 'Just have to go along those berry patches turn at that weird tree. Head towards that one lake and back over those hills. It shouldn't be too hard. Back to the tree maybe Kaede would still take me.'

Avalon is backtracking quickly to the village, when she senses a powerful aura. 'Has Sesshomaru already caught up to me?' She turns in a circle, looking around her in the last light of the sun's rays but sees nothing. When strong arms wrap around her mouth and arms, her eyes widen in fear. The assailant jumps with Avalon in their arms.

"Now now my pretty, don't worry. Soon you won't worry about Sesshomaru." His sleazy voice says in her ear.

Avalon tries to shake her head but he keeps his hand firmly on her mouth, using his thumb and index finger to pinch her nose, suffocating her as he leaps from tree to tree. Avalon struggles but soon passes out from the lack of oxygen. The male demon releases her mouth when he feels her go limp. "There, there. Rest for now ha, ha, ha, ha."

The demon continues his journey well into the night until he comes to a distant cave. He jumps and lands at the entrance walking in with a limp Avalon slung over his shoulder. He throws her down on the ground. He sees the katana at her hip and takes it away before tying her up. 'Now to just wait for her to wake,' an evil grin spreads across his face.

Sesshomaru makes his way to a village market center. The sun will be setting soon and the ningen would be packing up soon. Sesshomaru swiftly locates a comb. He lifts it off the table. The merchant is distracted by putting away his wares. "This comb, how much?"

The merchant looks up and sees Sesshomaru for the first time, freezing. Sesshomaru smells the fear radiating off of him. He does not answer but starts to stammer.

"I do not repeat myself."

"Free. Please just don't hurt me." The merchant flings himself on the ground and bows low to the ground.

'Pathetic ningen.' Sesshomaru leaves with the comb, tucking it into his kimono not looking back. When he gets back to camp things are not as he left them. Avalon is not in the tree and Jaken is asleep.

"Jaken."

Jaken jumps at his name."Milord?"

"Where is Avalon?"

"Avalon?" Jaken sweeps his eyes across the campsite but she is nowhere to be seen.

"She went to oshikko. She should be back any moment milord."

Sesshomaru takes a large sniff of the air and finds only trace amounts of her scent. He tracks Avalons scent till he gets to the spot of her abduction. He growls when her scent ends and another one comes into focus. "Yōgan. (溶岩)" the name makes his blood boil. He forms his yoki cloud to get a better view and to sniff the air higher up.

Avalon wakes with her arms tied behind her back and her legs bound. She blinks her eyes in the dark but she can't see anything except 2 orange lights. Suddenly several candles are lit, bringing light to the room, revealing a demon sitting not far from her. His hair is bright orange and his eyes are like molten lava. Avalon gasps at his appearance.

"You're awake." a cruel smile graces his lips. Avalon finds herself shaking. "Good. You fear me. I will be kind to you, if you cooperate," he flexes his claws. "Or not. My name is Yōgan and yours?"

Avalon eyes him warily considering her options. Does she have what it takes to keep from cracking. Taking a steady breath she decides to use her middle name. "Lillian," being brave she continues, "What do you want with me?"

"Oh Rirrian, such a lovely name." He reaches out to brush her cheek while she flinches away from him.

"Don't touch me."

Yōgan pulls his hand back. "I won't if you tell me what I want."

"Well, what do you want to know?"

Sesshomaru arrives to hear Avalon ask Yōgan "Well, what do you want to know?" He stops to listen, 'does she mean to betray me?' perhaps he will kill her and Yōgan at the same time.

"Why are you traveling with Sesshomaru?"

"Sesshomaru?"

"Don't deny it, you reek of him and don't lie, I will know."

"I'm just his slave, I mean nothing to him."

Yōgan slaps her across the face digging his claws in and leaves 3 gashes dripping blood, "I don't believe you. Sesshomaru hates ningen. He would never keep a slave. Try again."

Avalon's resolve hardens, "I have nothing more to say to you."

"Is that so?" Yōgan moves closer to her. His finger nails start to glow bright orange. "Last chance, before I get serious."

"Do what you must."Avalon closes her eyes waiting for the pain she knows will be coming.

Yōgan thrusts his nails into her shoulder burning her. She screams in agony. The burn stops any bleeding. He pulls his nails back out. Tears streak Avalons face as she whimpers. "Shall we try again? Why are you traveling with Sesshomaru"

Avalon yells, "WHAT DO YOU CARE!?"

"Wrong answer." He pushes his burning nails into her other shoulder.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!" Avalon pants at the pain.

"Why are you traveling with Sesshomaru?"

"GO TO HELL!"

"Foolish onna." He purrs as he grabs her by the neck picking her up and tossing her body against a stalactite. She crashes to the floor as the stalactite breaks and fall on her sending several sharp rocks cutting through her body.

"Come on my dear you can talk to me I won't tell him."

Avalon lays on her side gasping, catching her breath, "You're the foolish one. I'm already dead either way. If I tell you, you kill me, if I don't, you kill me."

Yōgan rushes to her side cupping her face, smearing the blood on her cheek. "Ie, ie deary. You have it all wrong. I'm saving you. If you tell me what I want to know you will be mine and I will protect you. You are quite the stunning onna. I would love to fill you with my seed."

"Get your hands off me!" She spits at him.

"My, my so feisty." He pulls his hand away, bringing his fingers to his lips licking her blood. "Mmm so tasty. Is that why the dog keeps you?"

"You're sick. Serious just go die already."

"Not happening my dear."

"I'm not your dear."

Yōgan finds he is angered by that and grabs her shoulder pushing his thumb into the wound. "Not yet but we will see."

Avalon gasps in pain.

"I want to hear you scream." Yōgan picks her up by her wound and punches her in the stomach sending her flying across the cave. She falls down coughing trying to catch her breath.

"You're not screaming! Why won't you scream?" He kicks her against the wall and hears a pop. Avalon grits her teeth biting her tongue in the process to stop the scream that wants to escape. Her left arm has been dislocated. Leaning down to look at her face that is contorted by pain, he sees blood drips from her mouth. Yōgan says in a mocking tone "Oh no. I think I broke something. Well, are you ready to talk."

Avalon heaves a breath, trying to ignore the searing pain. "I would never betray Sesshomaru-sama. So you may as well kill me."

"How disappointing, but as you wish." Yōgan grabs her throat and starts choking her. Avalon struggles against her ropes as the searing pain of his burning fingers burn her neck. "You better talk while you can. I won't give you another chance." Avalon resolves to die before telling this Yōgan anything. Her vision starts to blur and then blackens.

Suddenly Yōgan's hand leaves her neck as he rises and turns around as Sesshomaru makes his presence known. Avalon glimpses Sesshomaru though Yōgan's legs, whispering his name as she passes out.

"Ah Sesshomaru? Coming to save your dear Rirrian?"

Confusion crosses his face. He can't help but speak, "Rirrian?"

"Hai she has been quite a spitfire." Yōgan brings his hand up and allows his claws to glow bright orange. Then his face softens "But alas you were too late." He shakes his head.

Sesshomaru looks over at Avalon bleeding shallowly from her mouth and can hear her heart slowing.

"It won't be that much longer until she joins the dead. Too bad, too, she would have made a fine wife for me."

Sesshomaru sets his raging gaze on Yōgan and his aura flares out. "She will never be your wife." Sesshomaru moves with lightning speed. His right hand extends, claws ready to rip Yōgan's throat out. Yōgan dodges and slashes at Sesshomaru with his glowing claws. Sesshomaru catches him by the wrist and thrusts his other hand throw his chest grasping his heart and ripping it out. He drops Yōgan's body and heart and rushes to Avalon's side.

"Avalon."

Avalon makes no move to respond.

Sesshomaru goes to untie her and notices the odd angle of her left arm is in. He hesitantly removes the ropes. He speaks in a more demanding tone, "Avalon get up." When she still does not respond her shakes her. "Get up." Still she does not wake. 'Did I wait too long? Perhaps she is losing too much blood?' Sesshomaru licks along the three gashes on her cheek until they are healed. He moves to her mouth seeing the blood dripping. 'Is she bleeding internally?' he thinks in alarm. He gently opens her mouth with his hand and sees the large gashes on both sides of her tongue. He plunges his tongue into her mouth and swirls it around her it healing it. Seeing the glaring red scorch marks on her neck he licks them. He starts to strip her off her clothing, taking care not to move her weirdly angled arm too much. As he looks sees the 4 finger sized holes in each of her shoulders that have been burned shut. He growls seeing the wounds. He pushes his tongue into each wound several times till the holes start to close.

He looks closer at her weirdly angled arm. He moves it around and hears no crunching sound but feels how it moves without fluidity. 'Dislocated.' He recognises it from his time fighting in battles with his father. He rolls her on her back and positions himself by her side. He grabs her wrist with both his hands keeping her arm straight and level with her body with the palm facing down. He slowly moves her arm towards her head while using small circular movements until the arm was at a 90 degree angle from her body. He moves her arm to be in the proper position rotating it into place. He knew the steps as he watched it many times but a yokai would recover within a day. A human he was unsure of. He carefully scans her body for any other external injuries. Seeing the other lacerations along her body, he sets to work licking and healing each one. Once he is satisfied there are no more he moves to dress her again careful of her arm. He walks over to Yōgan's body and rips a large strip of clothing to use as a sling for her arm. He wraps the sling around her. Finding her katana laying on the floor, he grabs it and places it in her obi. Lifting her up he walks outside the cave. He forms his cloud of yoki and flies back to Jaken. He sets her gently down next to the dying fire.

"Jaken."

Jakes stirs from his sleep blinking seeing Avalon laying next to the fire.

"Oh you found her milord!"

"Jaken go and find some food for her and bring more wood."

"Hai."

Jaken scurries off into the forest to look for food and wood. Sesshomaru pulls his pelt from his side and lays it on top of Avalon.. He sits beside her and listens to her heart and breathing. The heart beats stronger and the breaths are not as shallow. He's pleased until he notices she starts to shiver. 'Is she cold?' He pulls off his armor and lays down on his back pulling Avalon up onto his chest and wraps his pelt around her along with his arms. Slowly the quivering slows and then stops and her heart beats normally and her breathing is what he knew it to be when she slept.

Jaken comes back with berries and mushrooms. Jaken is in shock when he sees Sesshomaru on his back with Avalon on his chest.

"Sesshomaru-sama?"

Sesshomaru's gaze flicks over to Jaken. Jaken's mouth hangs slightly opened as he stands there.

"The wood." Sesshomaru reminds him in a stern tone

"Oh right away!" Jaken turns and runs back to the trees but just as he is about to enter Sesshomaru calls him, "Jaken, leave the food." Jaken turns back, runs to place the food next to Avalon and his master then runs back towards the woods. Sesshomaru looks down at the woman he holds in his arms. He finds himself admiring her tenaciousness. 'She would rather die than betray me and here I thought I would have to kill her.' His mood sours as a hardly felt emotion consumes him, guilt. 'She nearly died because I waited too long.'

He whispers into her hair, "I will protect you from now on." He closes his eyes and listens to her steady breathing grateful that she is alive. Jaken comes back with wood and adds it to the fire but says nothing about Sesshomaru and Avalon laying together. He finds himself a comfortable spot and falls asleep.

Avalon wakes as the sun rises and goes to move when she finds she is trapped by strong arms. Her heart rate skyrockets and she thinks Yōgan still has her. She starts struggling in his grasp. Sesshomaru releases her immediately when he realizes what she wants but he does not understand why she reeks of fear. He sits up watching her with a critical eye. Avalon sits up and scoots away.

Looking around she soon realizes it is only Sesshomaru who held her. She instantly calms down and then remembers her last moments before blacking out. She thought he was only an illusion but he was real. He saved her. She springs up and jumps into his lap embracing him, even though the movement hurt, it was worth it. With joy in her voice she exclaims, "You saved me!"

Sesshomaru returns the embrace and Avalon holds onto him as tears begin to fall from her eyes. She was so scared and she is so happy to be alive and it is all thanks to this man.

Sesshomaru can smell the range of emotions coming off of her and is bewildered by them but says nothing as he holds her and lets her cry on his shoulder. After a while her tears begin to dry as she starts to pull herself back together. She whispers in a most heartfelt tone, "Thank you."

Though Sesshomaru appeared unfazed his heart clenched in a most painful way at her words. 'She shouldn't be thanking me. I let her be tortured just to test her loyalty.' He felt very lowly at that moment but none would know.

She soon releases him from her embrace and drops her arms. Looking him in the eyes, she says, "Sesshomaru, I nearly died because I didn't have a way to protect myself. I don't want that to happen again. A human blade is no match for a demon like Yōgan."

The mention of Yōgan's name infuriates him but he remains calm on the outside, "Yōgan is dead. You will not have to worry about him."

"Yōgan isn't the only demon who has set his sights on me. There was Ojike too and I am sure there will be more to come. You can't always be there." She looks down and in a soft down trodden voice she adds ,"You weren't there."

Sesshomaru finds it agonizing hearing her dismal words. 'I was, I just didn't stop it.' Sesshomaru for some reason feels like he should reach out and hug her and pull her close to him but refrains. He wonders if it is to comfort himself more than comfort her. He chastises himself. 'I do not deserve comfort.' Abruptly Sesshomaru stands grabbing his armor and putting it on.

"You will stay here today Avalon. You need to rest and recover."

"Yeah, I guess you're right, but what about.. ."

"We will discuss that once you are recovered." The finality in Sesshomaru's voice gives her pause. Avalon knew he was right about her recovering but she still wanted a way to protect herself 'Maybe Totosai could help with that, he specialized in demon blades."

"Jaken I need you to retrieve my dragon."

"Hai, right away." Jaken leaves camp to go find Sesshomaru's wandering beast. They were never too far from their master but did not come unless they were summoned.

The day passes slowly for Avalon. Sesshomaru is hovering over her constantly and he won't let her do anything by herself. She needs to oshikko and Sesshomaru follows her into the woods. He turns his back but still it's just weird. Eventually Jaken returns with the two headed dragon. Avalon slowly walks over to the dragon offering her hand to the heads. They each take a sniff and nuzzle into her hand. "Awww, aren't you guys sweet. Hey would you like some berries?" Avalon moves to pick up a handful of berries for the dragon when Sesshomaru tells her, "Stop."

"What, why?"

"You need nourishment, they do not. Eat and heal."

"Sesshomaru-sama, it doesn't quite work that way. I will heal but eating more than I normally would doesn't make me heal faster."

Sesshomaru eyes her studiously and then nods his head. "Very well, you may feed the dragon."

Avalon feels like rolling her eyes but refrains and offers the berries to the two heads each taking several berries and eating them. "Hey, they're good aren't they?" the dragon heads groan in agreement. Avalon smiles. She sits down in front of the dragon and pets their heads with her right hand. "I wish I could use my left hand so I could pet you both at the same time but I need to let it heal." One of the heads nuzzles her cheek.

Jaken and Sesshomaru watch the exchange both surprised at how calm Avalon is and how quickly the dragon seems to take to her. Sesshomaru decides to send Jaken away so he can talk to Avalon alone. "Jaken, go catch Avalon some fish to eat."

Jaken looks at Sesshomaru with dread in his eyes but responds with a forlorn, "Hai." 'He knows I'm no good at catching fish.' Jaken leaves to go fish. Once Sesshomaru is sure Jaken is out of hearing range he looks to Avalon who is currently petting his dragon.

"Avalon"

"Oh?"

"You recognize my dragon."

It is more of a statement but Avalon answers nonetheless "Well, of course I do."

"Why did you not ask to have him join us when you were injured?"

"Well…I didn't know if I should."

"Hmm?"

Avalon shrugs her shoulders then groans and feels the pain the movement causes.

Sesshomaru tsks, dismissing the conversation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please Kudo this is Nightbird755's first fanfic, your support is so welcome. Comment let us know if you like it!


	8. For her Sake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon recovers from Yogan's attack but after a soak in the springs things go bad fast.

"You're in pain," Sesshomaru says.

"Just a bit. I'll heal."

Sesshomaru nods as he considers, 'Perhaps I should bring her some sake. I know it can numb pain.'

Jaken returns later with 2 fish.

Sesshomaru seeing him calls him, "Jaken."

"Hai."

"Watch Avalon. I will return soon. Do not fail me again or I shall kill you."

Jaken gulps and nods his head.

Sesshomaru leaps into the air and flies off. Avalon lets out a sigh watching him fly off through the canopy of trees till she can't see the speck in the sky.

Jaken skewers the fish and places them around the fire. Avalon rests against Sesshomaru's dragon who will eventually be known as Ah-Un. She lets her eyes drift close as she listens to the water flowing in the nearby stream and eventually she nods off.

"Hey the fish are done."

Avalon slowly opens her eyes to the squeaky voice. Blinking a few times she goes to grab one of the fish but stops when her body rebels. The pain flares in her back, abdomen, and shoulder causing her to fall back down against the dragon. "Jaken can you please hand me one."

Jaken looks at her for a moment. 'She is asking? Is she really that hurt?' Jaken grabs one of the fish and hands it to her.

"Arigato."

Avalon sits against the dragon eating her fish. She has a dull throbbing in her shoulder when she isn't moving it. Her back and abdominal pain doesn't even register till she moves. When only bones are left she tosses it into the fire. She closes her eyes. 'The more I sleep, the quicker I'll heal plus I am really tired.' She thinks as she drifts back to sleep.

It's late day by the time Sesshomaru returns. He lands looking down at Avalon seeing her asleep, he's alarmed. 'Could she have fallen prey to konsui (( **昏睡** ) coma)?'

"Avalon!"

Avalon awakes instantly. "Oh, Sesshomaru what is it?"

Sesshomaru's worry evaporates. "I have something for you."

Avalon's eyes search him and sees the bottle he holds in his hand along with a small sack. Avalon raises an eyebrow. "Sake?"

Sesshomaru uses his other hand to pull something from his front and hands it to her.

Avalon looks at the proffered item. Her eyes light up. "A comb." She takes the comb moving to brush her hair but Sesshomaru stops her. She gives him a questioning look. "Put it away for now. We are leaving for a little while." He grabs her around the waist and sits her on the dragons saddle. He secures the bottle and sack to the dragon, grabbing the reins. Jaken moves to put out the fire. "Jaken you will stay here."

Jaken moves to protest but thinks better of it and nods.

Sesshomaru walks guiding his dragon thought the woods.

"Where are we going?"

"To a hot springs. It will aid in your healing."

"Sesshomaru, though I appreciate your concern I don't need to go to a hot springs."

"We are going," he says with finality

"Well you better keep your hands to yourself."

"Hands to myself?"

"Yeah, no more trying to get between my legs."

Sesshomaru chuckles. "I will refrain while you heal."

She says, "fine," while crossing her arms and hisses when she pulls too hard on her left arm.

After traveling for a little while Sesshomaru stops and lifts Avalon off the dragon carrying her bridal style walking until the hot springs comes into view setting her down. Sesshomaru leaves to grab the sake and cups as Avalon strips of her clothing off and steps into the water.

Sesshomaru quickly returns setting the sake and cups on the edge of the water stripping and joining Avalon in the water.

"Sesshomaru are you sure sake is a good idea?'

"Why wouldn't it be?"

"Well..." She blushes a little. "I've never drank before."

"Impossible."

"I haven't," she says a little flustered

"Why?" He arches an incredulous eyebrow

Avalon looks down and with a dismal voice says, "my father and mother were killed by someone who was drunk."

She thinks back to the night when the officer knocked on her door to tell her that a drunk driver had killed her parents. She was watching TV when she heard a knock on the door. She walked over and answered the door. "Can I help you?" She was looking at a female officer with brown hair and pale skin.

The woman looked at her with a sadness that Avalon couldn't place. "Is this the McLeon residence?"

Avalon answered hesitantly, "Yes."

"Then you must be Avalon. I'm sorry to inform you, there has been an accident."

"You mean like I need to get to the hospital to be by my parents side right?" she asked hopefully

"No miss. I'm sorry they didn't make it."

She looked behind the officer for the hidden cameras, sure it was a joke. "Miss?"

"Where is the camera? Who put you up to this? Was it Ray?"

"I'm sorry miss. This isn't a joke."

Avalon looked up at the officer and saw the pain behind her started to flow down her cheeks. "No, it can't be," she whispered. She was only seventeen. She still needed her parents. They were the only people she trusted.

"You are an orphan," he states simply. "Is that why you make no effort to return to this North America?"

"Yes partly," Avalon whispers.

"Partly?"

"I never found anyone to care about afterwards either."

"Brothers, sisters?

"Ie"

"Friends?"

She shakes her head sadly.

"Are you so unlikeable?"

She laughs a bitter chuckle. "What do you think?"

"Debate-able." Sesshomaru grabs the sake and pours two cups and hands one to Avalon.

She takes the cup offered to her, taking a sip and sputtering at the burning and bitter liquid. "Kami that's horrible!"

Sesshomaru chuckles. "Drink." He pushes the cup back up to her mouth.

She glares at him but takes another swig swallowing the bitter liquid. "Ehhh"

"Again," he smirks drinking his own cup down and pushing her to finish hers.

"Fine!" She holds her breath and swallows the rest of the liquid in one go. "There." She lets her hand drop holding the cup. He picks the cup up and fills it again, thinking that he will find out more about her if she is drunk. "How does a drunkard kill anyone but themselves from stupidity?"

Avalon thinks for a moment, 'he won't know what a car is but a cart yeah.' "He ran into their cart with his cart."

"This kills humans? Pathetic fragile creatures." Although his heart is not in the statement as he speaks.

"Not always."

"You would be dead if I had not come and healed you. How could you possibly survive on your own?" He refills his own cup and drinks.

"I told you I need a weapon," she pushes

"And how would you use this weapon? Waving it around and hoping that your enemies believed you could fight." He tops her cup off with more sake. "Drink."

She huffs but tips the cup and drinks. "I can fight. I didn't wave my sword around with Ojike. I stabbed him"

"But not where it counted," he said pridefully. "But you cannot expect more from a ningen onna."

"You..you..ah" She turns around to look away from Sesshomaru. She whispers, "I expect more from myself"

"More?" He raises the bottle to her.

Avalon can feel her reactions are slowing significantly but also the pain dulling. She hoped with more, her pain would be gone. She holds her cup up for him to fill, turning back to face him.

He fills her cup and continues, "if your sensei had taught you properly, you would have aimed for his neck or the belly where blood loss would render them useless. Where did you train?"

"I would have loved to hit him in one of those spots but he was protecting his body with me as his shield. I can't exactly stab through myself now can I? As for where I trained it was Aurora."

"As I said you were improperly trained." He sips his cup. "What is this Aurora?"

"It's a village."

He crosses his arms thinking. His own vision is slightly blurred from the heat of the hot springs and the sake. "There are no men that have asked for your hand? You are very old to be an unattached onna."

"Where I'm from we have to date first and I was never interested in dating."

"Date? Do you prefer females?"

"Hmm date, is like courting and though females have beauty they have never appealed to me.I much prefer you." Avalon covers her lips. She can't believe she said that.

"Date," he mulls the word over. "As if this Sesshomaru would take a ningen for more than pleasure. Odd that no one would ask for your hand." He blinks staring at his fingers going in and out of focus. "Unusually strong sake. Drink!" He spills the liquid into her cup

"You are so you Sessh." She downs what is in her cup

"Sessh?" He refills his cup. "Watch your tongue. I may be..." he burps covering his mouth, "intoxicated but..." he shakes his head to clear his vision. "I could still kill you."

She leans in towards him. "Ah Sesshomaru-sama, Sessh, it's better than fluffy." She giggles as she jumps back but stumbles and falls backwards into the water going under. She flails her hands not being able to figure out up from down.

He lifts her out by the top of the head and plops her in his lap, wrapping his arm around her waist, again becoming pensive. "Strange female," he huffs drinking from the bottle. "Why father would love something so tender." He tickles her sides with his claws. "Would it be worth bedding you? Or would I still be hungry afterwards? Perhaps you would be an appetizer. I would send for Sakura for the full meal and Yuri for desert."

"You say that, but you have no idea what I could do for you in bed." She laughs thinking of all the porno she's watched and wonders how many things he has participated in.

He only breaks into laughter. "With all of your experience? What do you know about pleasuring men?"

"I know more than you think obviously." She hiccups and starts laughing.

He snorts. "Like a puppy saying she is a wolf. No Sakura and Yuri will take over in the morning and then I will be satiated.

"Who said anything about me doing anything with you tonight?"

"The bottle is empty." He shakes it up and down and throws it to the side. "I must go to Jaken," he stumbles, dropping her back in the water. "I will send for them all. They will teach you."

She reaches and grabs his hand. "Uhhh, will you let me try something?"

"Jaken!"

"Shush!"

He stands up out of the water. "Where the hell is he? Jaken! Mother has many beautiful women in her castle."

"Sesshomaru, you're drunk."

"This Sesshomaru does not get drunk." He leans forward and sniffs her mouth. " you are drunk. You will practice on one of her courtiers and then come to my chambers...yes that will save time."

She becomes bold with him, her face so close to his and kisses him on the lips

"You wish to play now?"

"We can see where things lead."

"It has been sometime since I deflowered a virgin last..." he glances at Avalon although in a way, she was still innocent. "Perhaps I will allow you the honor of losing what is left of your virginity to me."

"Sesshomaru..."She looks into his eyes beseechingly "Can I trust if I tell you to stop, you will?"

He sits down, somewhat sobered. "It should begin with what you want. Not what you are forced to do."

She looks down and to her side, "yeah. Sesshomaru I don't know if I told you or not, but I was only 15 when I was raped. In my homeland that is young. I was still considered a child. After that I never responded to men's advances. It's why I never dated and I was never interested in women."

He pats the ground next to him, offering her a seat. "What do you want?"

"I want to be honest with you and you to be honest with me. I am interested in you a lot more than I should be, since I know you will never look at me as anything ... special. Still, you make sexual advances at me. I thought you hated my kind."

"I do. Your kind is useless." He picks up the bottle and shakes it to ensure it's empty. "I do not wish to procreate only to satiate a primal need. What do you want from this Sesshomaru?"

"How can you be sure you won't procreate if we have sex?"

"This Sesshomaru can smell when a ningen is fertile and you are not at this moment."

"Interesting, I wish for your complete honesty even if you have to swallow your pride for a little bit. Do I mean anything to you? You realize that liking one doesn't mean you have to like them all and I won't hold it against you but if I knew there was something there I would love to experience..." she gestures between their bodies "things with you."

"Physical pleasure does not require feelings of fondness. But perhaps it is here you should be looking for your value." As he speaks, his index finger lands squarely between her breasts, slightly confused at first, he jiggles his finger and watches them move, blinking to bring his world back into focus. "We need more sake."

"Do we have any?"

"It's empty. What do you want Avalon?" He pats her on the head. "Do you want to experiment?" He lays on his back staring at the stars, lacing his hands on his abdomen.

Avalon looks over at him lying there. She leans over to look him in the face. "Experiment, hmmmm hai but if I say stop we do?"

"Perhaps you should tell this Sesshomaru what you want. Specifically," he says with a smirk.

"Hmmm, well I want to explore your body first. Don't touch me yet though okay?"

Sesshomaru's intrigued by her request as it places him in a submissive role. "This Sesshomaru will allow it. For now."

Avalon reaches over placing an index finger on his forehead tracing the crescent moon. It feels like the rest of his skin. "You were born with this?"

"Hai."

She drops her fingers and moves them along his face, feeling every contour and brushing along his strips.

"Are your markings more sensitive than the rest of your skin?"

"Ie, but none touch my face."

Avalon quickly pulls her hands away and looks down ashamed. "Gomen."

"Ie, you have permission. Continue."

Avalon hesitantly puts her hands back on his cheeks and moves to brush his nose, then finally to run her finger along his lips. Sesshomaru opens his mouth at that moment and bits down on her finger to hold it in place and licks the tip. Avalon closes her eyes at the pleasurable feeling he causes her. He releases her finger. She pulls her hand back and bends down to kiss his lips. He brushes his tongue along her bottom lip asking for entrance. However Avalon has other ideas and pulls back to look at him. He lets out a quiet frustrated growl.

"No touching." she chastises. She places her hand along his neck brushing it delicately down and feels the way her fingers glide along his silky skin moving further down. She spreads her fingers as she moves them along his chest and pushes the muscles feeling the firmness. She continues her exploration down to his abdomen feeling the perfect six pack men would die for. She reaches her right hand down and takes his flaccid penis around the shaft in her hand and rubs her thumb along the foreskin covering the head. Sesshomaru releases a slight hiss when she grabs him. She starts to pump him attempting to get a reaction from his cock. She feels disappointed that he's not reacting to her touch.

"Am I truly that unappealing?"

"I have seen more beautiful among my kind."

"Shush, you're mean." She crosses her hands over her chest, feeling overly hurt by his words. She goes to get up.

Sesshomaru reaches for her, grabbing her around the waist pulling her back down "Where are you going?"

"I'm unappealing apparently, so I was going to grab my clothing and leave your highness's sight," she spat bitterly. When Sesshomaru still holds her, she says in a tight tone, "Let me go."

"This Sesshomaru cannot allow an intoxicated onna to wander alone."

"Well you don't have to hold me either." She struggles to get away from him but he just brings her to his chest holding her against his body.

"Rest Avalon. We will leave in the morning."

Avalon huffs in his embrace but resolves to sleep even if he was holding her against her will, it did feel nice to be held by him. With that happy thought she drifts off to sleep.

Avalon awakes shivering, laying naked on the ground while Sesshomaru rests against a tree clothed. She moves to rub her arms to help bring warmth back to them. Feeling the pounding in her head and the ache in her shoulder.

"You're awake?"

"Yeah but I need water."

Sesshomaru points behind them at the hotspring.

"To drink," she says flatly. She searches the ground for her clothing. 'He could have at least covered me.' She grabs her juban and kimono wrapping them like a robe around herself. Avalon looks over at him in the dim light of the moon. He is beautiful as ever and she feels like a haphazard disaster. She shakes her head and instantly regrets it. She puts her head down into her hands. "Sesshomaru please, can you get me some water to drink."

"We will return to camp once you are dressed, then you will be able to drink." He gets up to help her dress being careful of her left arm. She then moves to put on the sling to keep her arm stable. All the while her head is killing her. She gathers the sake bottle and cups. 'At least I can carry water with me now'.

Sesshomaru lifts her up carrying her bridal style. She becomes mesmerized with the way the moon reflects off of his skin and seeing his lips, she can't seem to stop herself. She bends herself forward to kiss him on the lips. Sesshomaru is momentarily stunned by her boldness. He lips remain unyielding under hers. Avalon pulls back disappointed that he would not return her kiss.

"Avalon." Sesshomaru moves to set her down, letting her stand.

"Sesshomaru?" She worries she has pushed him too far but she can't see why since he's been going after her for the past several days. Why the change?

"Get on the dragon." Avalon nods, still unsure of what she did. Avalon climbs on when she is settled Sesshomaru grabs the reins walking back to camp. She wants to ask what's wrong but she doesn't know how to say it. Sesshomaru leads them back to camp where Jaken still sleeps. She slides off the dragon grabbing the bottle. She slinks off towards the stream feeling depressed. 'I'm finally willing to do something with him and he rejects me. Why?'

Sesshomaru calls, "Jaken."

"My Lord you've returned."

"Go gather wood for the fire."

"Hai right away." Jaken scurries off into the woods.

Meanwhile Avalon arrives at the stream bending down, she submerges the bottle in the water filling it. She lifts it to her lips drinking greedily, knowing most of her headache is due to dehydration. Once the bottle is half empty she plunges it back beneath the surface. Pulling it from the water, she makes her way back to camp. She lays herself down next to the fire. She turns to look over at Sesshomaru who has sat himself beneath a tree at the edge of the clearing, looking at the sky. Avalon sighs and rolls back over and let herself drift off to sleep.

Jaken comes back laden with wood, depositing some in the fire and most beside it. Jaken finds a comfortable spot and falls asleep.

Avalon starts shivering in her sleep. Sesshomaru notices it and comes over removing his pelt as he walks, positioning it over Avalon. Slowly her shaking ceases. Looking her over he wonders if he should find warmer clothing for Avalon as fall will be turning to winter soon. He sits pondering the strange things that have happened. He lets his mind wander for the rest of the night.

Avalon wakes when the sun starts to rise and light filters through the forest canopy hitting her eyes. She sits up feeling something roll down her. She looks down and sees Sesshomaru's pelt pooled around her waist. She looks to her left seeing him. "Morning Sesshomaru-sama."

Sesshomaru nods his 's considered all night and decides, she needed time away from him. She's too eager to have his affections and he cannot afford a love sick onna following him. He remembers the old miko who offered her shelter. He will leave her there.

"Jaken."

Jaken hearing his name shot up. "Hai."

"Find food for Avalon. Once she has eaten, we will be on the move."

Jaken nods and head off looking for food. Avalon can feel that the air is weird. She still feels, she erred last night. She can think of nothing to say, so she picks up Sesshomaru's pelt, lays it over her right arm and shuffles over to get closer to Sesshomaru. She hands him back his pelt. "Arigato."

Again Sesshomaru merely nods to acknowledge her. Avalon presses her lips together. Something's definitely off. Jaken comes back with berries and hands them over to Avalon. She slowly eats them. Her stomach is in knots, she can't seem to finish. She sets them down.

Sesshomaru asks in a cold tone, "Are you finished?"

"Hai." She answers disheartened. 'He's being too cold.'

Sesshomaru gets up. "Come."

Avalon moves to get up on the dragon as Jaken grabs the reins and follows Sesshomaru. She quickly realizes they are heading back towards the village.

"Why are we going back to Kaede's village?"

Sesshomaru does not answer and just continues to walk while Jaken exclaims, "Do not question Sesshomaru-sama."

Avalon huffs and crosses her arms. She's sure she would find out soon enough. It should only take about an hour or so to get there. They arrived at the edge of the village to a similar greeting. Men are ready with weapons but Kaede's already there waiting.

"Avalon, you will be staying here."

"Nani,naze?" She doesn't move from her mount.

"Come."

Avalon reluctantly gets off the dragon. "This is a mistake."

"Miko, you will ensure this onna's safety or your people will pay the price."

"Sesshomaru-sama you can't order people around. She isn't your servant."

Sesshomaru looks at Avalon with a deadly glare. "Jaken you will stay here as well to ensure Avalon's safety."

"He can't stay, he's a demon." Avalon argues.

"ONNA! Cease your arguments this Sesshomaru's word is final."

"I will do no such thing! You don't know what a mistake you are making by leaving me here."

"This Sesshomaru makes no mistake."

"Why are you wanting to leave me here?"

"You are unnecessary."

"But you are leaving me in the care of this village. If I was truly so worthless _nazena no_ (why not) leave me in the woods?"

"This Sesshomaru need not answer you."

"You don't think I know what I'm talking about. You think this has all been a big guessing game for me? Perhaps if I start telling you of your past you might believe me."

"Proceed."

"Bokusenō."

"You may have heard rumors."

"Your mother living in the clouds in a castle, she looks very much like you but she only has one slash mark on each cheek but she has the same moon on her forehead as you."

"All things you could learn with enough determination."

Avalon presses her lips together. "I sure planned this out well didn't I? Researching everything I could find out about you, getting raped and it just so happens you saved me? Believe what you will, just don't expect me here when you get back."

Sesshomaru is outraged by her audacity. "You will be here when I return."

"This village holds nothing for me. I have no reason to stay."

"Jaken will stay to assure you remain here."

"You don't control me Sesshomaru," she says in a dark tone. She turns to walk toward the village. Sesshomaru grabs her injured shoulder to spin her around. Avalon exclaimes, "Ahhh!" in pain from the jarring of her left shoulder.

Sesshomaru nearly growls out, "Do not disrespect this Sesshomaru."

Avalon looks directly into his eyes saying in a monotone, "As you wish"

She turns her back on him taking on the stands of his late father . "Sesshomaru Obiru mamoru Dareka?"( **帯びる** **守る** **誰か** /Do you have someone to protect)

Sesshomaru's eyes widen momentarily then narrow but Avalon cannot see since she is looking away.

"Where did you hear that?"

Avalon looks over her shoulder and smirks at him. "I know many things Sesshomaru. Do you still intend to leave me here?"

"I'm going."

Avalon screams in frustration leaning down she grabs a rock turns around and throws it as hard as she can at the back of his head. Sesshomaru turns and catches it then crushes it turning it into rubble. He levels a glare at Avalon. Avalon doesn't look away, she is seething with rage. In a dead tone she says "Baka." Avalon turns her back and starts walking towards the village. Sesshomaru is in shock, how could the onna be so defiant? He rushes to grab her spinning her around to face him. "Have you no sanity?"

Avalon locks eyes with him a fierceness he's never seen. "Not when it comes to you."

Sesshomaru scoffs turning into his signature blue ball of light and blasting out of sight. 'Jaken and the dragon will stay to watch over her and if the miko fails in her duties, I will slaughter the village in retribution.' He leaves behind a very pissed Avalon and a very distressed Jaken.

Avalon turns back towards the village and screams as loud as she can as tears stream down her cheeks. She glares at the gathered villagers, "Stop looking at me!" She starts to head toward the village. She knows what she wants and she knows who she wants to see. The villagers exclaim, "Lady Kaede what do we do?"

Kaede responds with a shallow voice, "Do? I have been charged with caring for the girl. That is what I will do." 'Though I think the girl does not intend to say long, this will be a bother.'

Kaede catches up to Avalon leaving the men behind. Jaken stays rooted to his spot with tears sparkling in his eyes trying to hold them back hoping beyond hope his master will come back. Finally seeing that he will not return her scuttles over to the rubble of the rock exclaiming as he kicks it, "See what you did wench…" his foot sizzles when he makes contact dropping his nintojo, he grabs his foot and holds it in his hand, while blowing on it. 'What is this?' He looks over his shoulder at the retreating forms of the villagers and Avalon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo!


	9. Hikari (光)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon meets a young girl so much like her and so different at the same time, it makes Avalon resolve to help Hikari

Avalon walks towards the village with Kaede on her heels. She slows to allow the older Miko to catch up. Once Kaede is beside Avalon, Avalon speaks, “Lady Kaede I cannot stay here.”

‘So it begins. Though I do not like bending to the will of a youkai, I fear I am no match for him.’ “Nay child. Ye cannot travel now. It is not safe. Winter will be upon us soon.”

Avalon is shocked as she had assumed it was only springtime. Her time frame has been drastically reduced. “Winter, how soon?”

“Within 3 moon cycles”

‘That explains the cold.’ “Then I cannot delay. I must move immediately.”

“Nay. It is not only the cold but also rōnin. They are about and ye would be easy prey.”

Avalon presses her lips together, knowing Kaede is right but she still doesn’t want to remain in this village. Any other village would have been fine but she fears she will get the attention of a certain hanyou, Naraku. 

“I am sure I won’t be alone, the imp would follow reluctantly but he would simply to protect his master’s property,” she spits the last part out bitterly. She is no one's property but Sesshomaru did not feel the same way.

“I cannot let ye leave, gomen but I must protect this village above all. I have been charged with keeping ye safe and I cannot do that if ye leave.”

“KAEDE, so you would force me here against my will!” Avalon’s shocked she would do that.

“I have no choice in the matter, ye must be kept safe.”

Avalon understands her predicament but still wants to leave. 

Kaede noticed when she threw the rock that held reiki, but she doesn’t sense any power from her at this time. ‘Perhaps she is inexperienced. I will nurture her gift while she is in my care.’ “Come child let us rest, it has been a busy day.” 

Avalon concedes. Her body aches and she’s tired. The elder miko brings her arm around Avalon’s waist and pulls her along to her hut. “It’s not much but it is home.”

Avalon pulls back the door flap and steps inside with Kaede following behind. “Are ye hungry?” 

Avalon shakes her head no. 

“Do ye wish to sleep?” 

Avalon shakes her head no. 

“Will ye speak to me?” 

Avalon walks to the back corner of the hut sits down and looks away from Kaede. Kaede shakes her head. “I must tend my people, they will be worried. When ye are ready to speak, do so.” With that Kaede exits the hut as Jaken enters. Avalon’s head slumps forward and her tears start to fall. She says barely more than a whisper, “Jaken, I can’t stay here.”

Jaken says smugly, “Sesshomaru-sama commands you to stay here and I will keep you here.”

Avalon shakes her head and continues to cry silently.

Kaede returns hours later, once the sun sets. Avalon fell asleep sitting up. Kaede moves about making dinner, grabbing herbs and vegetables tossing them into a pot of boiling water. Avalon sits up hearing movement. She looks up, seeing it is only Kaede and leans her head back, closing her eyes. “Eat something child.” Kaede attempts to hand her a bowl of soup. 

Avalon opens her eyes, taking the offered bowl, then sets it down and closes her eyes again. Kaede heaves a sigh. “Would ye little yokai like some?”

“I do not eat ningen food.” 

Avalon lowers her head into her hands and shakes her head. Leaning back again she tries to sleep again until she hears more movement about the hut. Avalon opens her eyes watching Kaede moving futons out. “When ye are ready to sleep ye may rest here.” Avalon nods her head closing her eyes and tries to rest. Soon Kaede and Jaken fall asleep and start snoring. 

Avalon finds the sound annoying being in an enclosed area. She slips out of the hut and leans against the back wall looking up at the sky. She misses talking to Sesshomaru and feeling safe. She gets up and finds a tree within the village and climbs up it and gets comfortable and falls asleep.

Kaede wakes the next morning and looks to the empty futon. She isn’t too surprised it’s empty. Her eyes sweep over and see the little yokai still sleeping and continues to the corner Avalon was in earlier. When she isn’t there she scans the rest of her hut and feels panic start to well within. Not finding her, Kaede rises from her futon and rushes out the door. She sees the villages moving about as if it was any other day. Still not finding Avalon, she rushes back into the hut. “Little yokai!” 

Jaken wakes slowly. “The name is Jaken.”

“The girl is gone.” 

“The girl, what girl?” Then it dawns on him “Avalon?”

“Is that her name?”

“Hai.”

“Avaron is gone.” 

Jaken jumps up rushing out of the hut. Together they start calling her name. The villagers hear their miko looking for Avalon and join in the search. They call her name over and over again but receive no reply. 

She hears them alright, Avalon just doesn’t care to answer. She spends hours in the tree until she is ready to come down. Once she’s sure no one is around, she climbs down and walks into Keade’s hut and rests against the back corner again. She closes her eyes, just then Kaede rushes back in to grab her bow to search the forest. She stops short when she sees Avalon sitting against the wall. “Avaron!” Avalon looks up at her. “Ye must answer when ye are called.” 

Avalon’s gaze turns cold and she rises to her full height towering over Keade. “I will do as I see fit. I was in the village and safe. Your duty is fulfilled. I am not a dog who comes at your beckon call.”

Kaede backs down as she had not meant it as such. “I meant no disrespect, I only mean that I need to know ye are safe and that I cannot know if ye do not at least respond.”

“Are you that insufficient a Miko that you would not know that a yokai has entered your midst?”

“I feared ye had escaped.” 

Avalon turns on her heels and walks out of the hut stopping at the flap. “I will not leave the village. I understand your position.” She continues to walk out letting the flap drop behind her. Several of the villagers spot her and try to stop her. She lashes out with a kick sending them flying. “Do not touch me!” She continues her walk. The villages who witness the display clear a path for her. She comes to a large tree that offers a lot of shade and sits beneath it closing her eyes. 

Jaken sees her and runs over to her. “Where were you?”

Avalon opens her eyes, “Safe.”

Jaken gets upset by her answer. “That’s not a place.”

Avalon closes her eyes and in a tight tone says, “It is the only answer you will get Jaken. Leave me.”

“You don’t command me.”

“Will you stand here and berate me then?”

Jaken sputters and turns his back and walks away. Avalon hears the fading sound of his footsteps and smirks. Until she hears shuffling feet coming her way, the smirk turns into a frown.

“Lady Kaede.”

“Avaron.”

“It is Avalon.” She emphasizes the “L” sound. “Stick your tongue between your teeth and bite down to keep it in place when you pronounce the ‘l’ sound. Its slightly garbled but it is better than the ‘r’ sound.”

Kaede takes a seat by Avalon. “Child ye need to learn ye place.”

Avalon sighs, she knows she has been acting rudely. “I am a prisoner Kaede. This village is my prison. Would you be kind to your jailers?”

“I do not want ye thinking that way child.”

“There is nothing to think about, it is the truth.”

“Ye seem to be a warrior of sorts. I would like to train ye.”

“Train me?”

“That yokai will return for ye, and once he comes, ye will be leaving with him I assume?”

“Hai.”

“Perhaps ye can defy him once ye are free of this village and I would like to help ye with that.”

Avalon hums thinking of that. She doesn’t actually want to defy him but being able to fight better would be an advantage.

“I accept your offer Lady Kaede.”

“Well first, no more of this unruly behavior.”

“Hmph the villagers need to keep their hands off me.” 

“None should touch ye child. I think ye proved that well.”

“I suppose.” Avalon gives her a small smile.

“Come child. We start ye training today but first ye need to eat.” Kaede gets up and Avalon follows behind. They make it to her hut and slip inside. Kaede puts the pot of soup on from last night and lets it boil. Once done, she scoops a portion into a bowl for Avalon. Avalon takes the bowl and eats. Jaken returns to the hut finding Avalon and Kaede inside. Kaede offers Jaken a bowl. Again he refuses. Avalon shakes her head and says under her breath, “Stubborn.” 

Once Avalon and Kaede finish eating, Kaede leads Avalon out of the hut. Jaken exclaims, “Where are you going?”

Kaede responds, “To train.”

Kaede takes Avalon out to a quiet lake. “Now child, I need ye to get on the ground and sit in a comfortable position.”

Avalon slowly lowers herself to the ground and sits indian style. Kaede raises her brow at the odd pose but continues with her instructing, “Place ye hands like this. ”Kaede folds her hands together. "Close ye eyes."

Avalon follows Kaedes hand movements and closes her eyes wondering if Kaede was wanting her to meditate. She is all too familiar with it because of her training in martial arts but says nothing. Kaede watches as her eyes close. “Repeat after me, HI FU MI YO I MU NA YA KO TO MO CHI RO RA NE SHI KI RU YU I TSU WA NU SO O TA HA KU ME KA U O E NI SA RI HE TE NO MA SU A SE E HO RE KE” 

Avalon attempts to repeat what Kaede says but forgets half of it. “Gomen Kaede-sama can you please repeat that?"

Kaede repeats the prayer again. Avalon tries again after about 3 more times she remembers the whole thing. "Avalon I need ye to focus on breathing. I want ye to meditate. Have ye any experience?" 

Avalon nods her head and begins to focus on her breathing, bringing positive energy in and pushing negative energy out. Avalon attempts to imagine a beautiful sky with fluffy clouds but soon finds her mind thinking of the moon. The moon makes her mind drift to a crescent moon on a certain someone's forehead, Sesshomaru. Avalon quickly tries to bring her mind away from him. He is only a distraction. After going about it several times, she winds up thinking about him, she tries to make peace thinking of his unnatural beauty. She imagines him in his kimono and hakama standing in the moonlight. It was a most surreal scene and finally she drifts into a deep meditative state while Kaede watches her. After several hours Kaede brings her back out. “How do ye feel?”

“Stiff, and hungry,” is the only response Avalon gives. She really doesn’t feel anything else, well a little horny but she wasn't going to share that bit. 

Kaede shakes her head. It didn’t bring her spiritual powers out. Kaede stands and her bones crack. Avalon gets up and stretches backwards to pop her back. ‘I will try again tomorrow.’

They head back to Kaede’s hut for the evening. Soup is made and Jaken finally relents and joins them in eating. They talk of things around the village while Jaken makes snide comments about ningen. The futons are brought out and Avalon lays on hers. Kaede falls asleep quickly and Jaken as well. Avalon can’t seem to stop her restless mind missing a certain dai-yokai and again finds herself annoyed at the snoring. Having enough, she exits the hut and climbs the same tree as last time.

Kaede wakes that morning and finds only Jaken and starts to worry again but her fear is belayed when Avalon steps through the hut door. “Morning Lady Kaede.” 

Kaede nods her head and gets to work preparing a new pot of soup. “Will ye cut some vegetables?” 

Avalon nods. Kaede hands her a knife and she starts to cut up some roots and place them in the pot. Soon the soup is done and readily passed out. Once everyone is finished eating and the hut put back together Keade leads Avalon back to the spot from yesterday and has her attempt meditation again. But, instead of letting her meditate the way Avalon had she instructs her in the art of Kuji, starting with the hand sign for rin and having her repeat the mantra, 'On baishiramantaya sowaka'. Still nothing comes of it. Kaede leads her back to the village where she tends to the sick while Avalon observes. Avalon finds herself interested in the herbs Keade uses. “Lady Kaede will you teach me about the herbs you use for treating illness?”

Kaede is surprised but pleased she is interested, “Hai.” Several villagers greet Kaede and also attempt to speak with Avalon. She has no interest in befriending them and would only reply with minimal answers and never engage further. When children would come and wish to play she would regard them coolly. Being as tall as she was, she towered over most of the villagers and used that to keep them at a distance. She was loathe to admit it, but she didn’t want to connect with anyone here, for the simple fact that here was too cruel in her eyes. Disease ran rampant and men were brutal. The time was a bloodbath. If she let no one in, then when someone would die, it would not hurt. She would feel sorry for the person who passed sure and pity for the family but it wasn’t her burden to bare.

The next couple of days pass similarly, eating, meditation using Kuji as the guide. Each day was represented by a different sign. They treated the ill, learning of herbs and then going back to sleep but Avalon is never in the hut when Kaede awakes. She just can’t stand being confined there.

Kaede starts to worry for her charge as the girl would never engage the villagers more than a passing nod. She starts the morning the same teaching her Sha this morning with the mantra of, ‘On hayabaishiramantaya sowaka.’ After the morning meditations they return to the village where Kaede leads Avalon to her garden of herbs. They get on their knees and start plucking the small little weeds that dare to sprout. Kaede soon stands leaving Avalon to tend the herbs while she walks away, "I Will be back soon child." 

Avalon nods and continues to pluck the weeds.

Kaede later returns with a young girl. "Avalon, I want you to meet Hikari." Hikari offers a low bow to Avalon. Avalon stands up brushing the dirt from her kimono and bows her head in return. "I will leave ye two to talk." 

Little do the three know, they have an observer. Sesshomaru had decided to check on Avalon today. He masks his aura and is out of sight but he watched as the miko was followed by a child who limped. When the miko left her with Avalon to talk to he scoffed at the idea. That onna was cold, why would she care to talk to a useless invalid? 

"Kaede-sama?" Avalon questions. 

Kaede never responds as she walks away. Avalon looks at the girl for a brief moment and then settles for ignoring her while she lowers herself back down to pull more weeds. Hikari sits seiza style next to her clearing her throat. Hikari moves some hair from her eyes revealing a large scar that goes from her eyebrow down to the side of her lips. "Hi."

Avalon nods her head in acknowledgment, noticing the scar and wondering where it could have come from but her curiosity isn't overwhelming. Just the kind of response Sesshomaru anticipated.

"Is your family dead too?"

Avalon's head snaps to look at the girl. She answers in a sad tone "Hai, they are."

"Did the samurais kill them?"

"Samurais killed your family? Gomen." She didn't want to answer how her family died so she hoped to avoid giving an answer. Avalon was right, life was too cruel. The girl looked no more than 14 and has no family She continues to look at Hikari wondering about what happened but she stifles the curiosity. It wasn't her burden to bare.

"Hai," Hikari answers. "Two years ago. How did your parents die?" 

‘She will never open up to the child,’ Sesshomaru thinks from his place in the bushes.

Avalon's lips press together in a thin line, deciding how to phrase it, "They were killed by a drunkard."

"How old were you?"

Avalon wants to snap at the young girl, 'Older than you,' but could see the vulnerability in her eyes, so she went with just telling her, "17."

"Did they kill your husband too?”

"I've never married. I am not fit to be wed. Don't you know I traveled with yokai?"

"I saw when he left you here. He looked mean," she says softly. "I'm not fit for marriage either. No one wants me." Her head lowers in shame.

Avalon maliciousness stops short. She had wanted the girl to leave her alone. "Because of the scar?" She hopes that was the reason but suspects it was not.

Hikari shakes her head and stares off into the distance. "It hurt didn't it?" She swallows, struggling to speak. "There were six of them. They took Ka-chan first."

Avalon swallows the lump in her throat. She was right, this time was too cruel. It wasn't the girls fault but because of it she was left with few options. "Hai it hurt." She says in a soft voice. "Who is Ka?"

"Hahaue, she cried. To-san tried to save her but they killed him. Then they took me. I cried for the first one, but not the ones after that. I was eleven. They burned my village. Kaede-sama found me in the forest after I ran away." She wipes her eyes, trying to stifle her tears. 

Sesshomaru shakes his head, ‘no honor among these ningen. A child should not experience these things.’

"Is that why the youkai wanted you?"

Avalon shakes her head letting a single tear slip out. She quickly wipes it away

"Does he want to marry you? He doesn't care that someone else had you first?"

Avalon half huffs half laughs. "Ie. He doesn't want to marry me." 

Hikari rubs the scar on her face. "The last said this would make sure I always remembered him. He was sweaty and stunk."

Avalon grits her teeth. "Bastards, we don't need physical reminders."

Sesshomaru suddenly wonders what scars he had overlooked on her body while pressuring her for something she wasn’t ready to give. Did the first one leave traces of himself behind? The second one?

"They said it's all women are good for. Ka-chan helped me escape. She distracted them, offered herself to them." She buries her face in her knees. "She told me to run. I left her to die!"

She breaks down completely sobbing. "It's all my fault.”

Avalon reaches over to put her hand on Hikari, running her palm in a circle over her back. "Hikari there was nothing that you could have done. If you would have stayed, you would be dead too. Any Hahaue would want their child alive. By you living you honor her memory.”

Sesshomaru listens shocked to hear Avalon so open and caring. ‘Is this truly my Avalon?’ He shakes his head, ‘she is not mine. Why would I think of her as such?’ 

"But no one wants me now," she cries flinging herself against Avalon's chest and wrapping her arms around her waist. "I'm dirty."

‘Dirty,” he scowls. ‘Ningen men are filth.’ His mind seethes, children should not be prey to the urges of men. 

"You are not dirty." Avalon says as she gathers the young child into her chest. "Men are stupid pigs." She runs her hands down the girls hair. "If it is your wish to be a wife, I am sure there may be a man out there that will want you. But have you considered perhaps you could take a different path? I've resolved to be a warrior. I don't need a man."

‘No,’ his eyes roll, ‘she just wants a demon lover.’ 

"I don't know how to fight," Hikari hiccups trying to stop her tears. "My arm doesn't work well." She picks up her right hand, showing how floppy it is from the elbow down. "They twisted it. It doesn't work anymore."

"You could be a healer then, Kaede's knowledge is vast and you could learn much from her."

She shakes her head. "Can you teach me? Even with a bad arm?"

"Teach you what? To be a warrior or a healer?"

"A warrior! The next time a man tries to rape me, I can fight."

Avalon shakes her head, ‘to think she worries about the next time.’ "I can teach you some ways to defend yourself but I don't know how long I will be here for."

"Where are you going to go?" Hikari asks Avalon. "The demon didn't look very nice."

Sesshomaru’s eyes narrow in on the child suddenly annoyed with her declaration. 

Avalon smiles down at her. "He is difficult, but I am loyal to him. I owe him my life."

"Is that why you let him talk to you like that? To-san said when a man really respects a woman he talks to her heart not screams in her ears."

"He doesn't respect me Hikari but I don't give him the respect he thinks he deserves either so perhaps we are both at fault. The relationship and I use that word loosely is complicated. But he has redeeming qualities like he would never force himself on me."

‘She has never shown the proper respect save the first time we met. Relationship? Does she think we are courting?’

"Is that why you want to be with him? You know he won't make you?"

"Hikari, I have no illusion. I doubt I will ever be more than perhaps a lover for him but I can see so much potential. He may look all grown up but he needs to grow up mentally. I am not looking for a husband."

Sesshomaru scoffs, ‘grow up, I will never love a human.’

"You want him to love you?" She covers her mouth shocked.

"I would like that."

His anger rages, he will not love her, Avalon is a means to an end, to his father’s sword, nothing more. 

"He's a demon...you'd have hanyou children. No one likes Inuyasha. Kaede-sama said he was rejected by humans and demons why would you curse your children like that? They wouldn't have any friends. No one would like them. You'd be alone and die before they even grew up."

“I don't think I can have children."

‘She can’t have children?’ He listens carefully.

"Why not?"

"It's complicated." How could she explain that her doctors had warned her of the encroaching danger her endometriosis caused. Each year that passes without conception would lead to less and less chances of it happening.The only reason she wasn't gripped with agonizing pain was for a recent birth control known as Nexplanon.

"But why him? He was mean. He doesn't like you."

‘Intelligent child, this Sesshomaru has no fond feelings for that onna.’ 

Avalon shakes her head. "I never said he was the one. I just am very attracted to him and if he hadn't stepped in, I would not be here now. He saved me from being killed by my would be rapists."

"You like how he looks. You remind me of my friend Tori. She had a crush on the village leader's son because he shot an arrow through two men who tried to take her into the forest. He was engaged to someone else. It's nice to like what we can't have sometimes."

Avalon shakes her head. The child was so young but it was more than a simple crush, "I think you are wrong on one point Hikari. He does like me.”

‘I do not.’ 

“He doesn't want to admit it but he would do things for me." She pulls the comb holding her hair back, "Like this, giving me this comb it was not necessary for my life but he got it for me.” She pushes the comb back in her hair. “The kimono I wear is a gift as well. It has seen better days it was pristine when I got it."

‘Because you were naked and had nothing else and your hair was embarrassing.’ 

Hikari starts laughing covering her mouth. "You have a crush on him. Maybe it's just the way we were made, to have to be with people who hurt us."

‘I never hurt her,’ he starts and then stops, remember how he flung her to the ground and choked her and the bruises that wrung around her neck. ‘She lied to this Sesshomaru,’ he rationalizes. ‘Why am I here?’

Avalon scrutinizes Hikari chastising her, "You wish to be with your rapists?"

Hikari bristles at Avalon’s change in voice "No, but he was rough with you and you like him for it. What does that say about you?"

He snorts, agreeing with Hikari.

"You wouldn't understand. I don't like him because he was rough with me."

"But you like him anyway, even though he does." She rubs her limp arm and says, "It's going to rain soon."

Avalon looks at the sky and can see the gathering clouds. "Come on, lets go to Kaede's hut we will continue this conversation."

“But you said you would teach me to fight!”

"I can do that in the hut while we talk. Do you wish to be soaked in the rain? We can stay here if you like"

“Okay,” She gets up and limps next to Avalon. Her left foot turns in while she walks, revealing not just her arm was injured when she was raped.

Avalon frowns, 'this will be difficult.' As Avalon walks next to Hikari she says, "Sesshomaru is the only one I would allow to be rough with me. I would do anything in my power to stop any other man just so you know."

‘As if she could stop anyone,’ he sneers. ‘She could not stop this Sesshomaru.’

“But you still let him. Maybe it’s all we’re good for. Maybe the gods just want us to suffer.” She hobbles trying to keep up.

Avalon stops and turns on her heels grabbing Hikari's shoulders, lightly shaking her and states angrily "Do not ever think that way. Sesshomaru is a very special case and I cannot explain to you why but trust me." She emphasizes "We are not meant to suffer."

Hikari just snorts. “If you believed that you wouldn’t let anyone treat you like that.”

Avalon looks at her sadly, "Do you know air exists?"

“Yes?”

"But you can't see it?"

"Did you know the sun will rise tomorrow?" Avalon gets up and starts walking again.

“Those are things we don’t have control over...not that we can control what men do. Do you like when he hurts you?” She trips falling on her knees cursing holding her bad ankle. “It wasn’t like this before. Kaede-Sama couldn’t fix it.”

Avalon kneels down to look at her ankle lifting it up to inspect it. "That wasn't my point Hikari. My point is, some things you just know. I know things that others don't, like this ankle, I may know how to fix it."

‘She can fix her?’ It was a shocking revelation. He recalled that the incident occurred 2 years ago.

“Really??” Her face lights up.

"Hai, it may take time but I think I can. It will be painful."

“What isn’t painful?”

"Ummm lots of things. Petting puppies, smelling flowers."

“You must come from a place that isn’t here. They killed the dogs first so they couldn’t alert the village.”

"Well I am sure we can convince a traveling merchant to bring us some puppies then."

“You have money?? Did you have sex to get it? Is that what he gave you?” 

"I never used my body for sex and I can get money from other things. I never had sex with Sesshomaru-sama.” Since Avalon had been helping Kaede with healing the villagers Kaede had been giving her a small allowance. She figures she can use that to get a puppy. 

Avalon manipulates Hikari’s ankle and realizes it’s dislocated and was never properly re-positioned. She would have to pull it from the odd angle it set in and hope it would fit back in. 2 years was a long time but she hopes the child can recover. She knows she will be laid up for several weeks and would have to get Kaede to agree to care for her during that time if she wasn't there. 

Being a freelance translator gave her access to many things, one being a hospital that specialized in orthopedic injuries. Avalon was always one to take the opportunity to learn. She would watch the doctors perform their exams and translate between the doctor and patient. She had to familiarize herself with medical terms and understanding human anatomy since English and Japanese wasn’t a word to word translation. The doctors appreciated that she knew what she was talking about it saved a great deal of confusion.

"I can stay with you while I am here but I don't know how long my stay will be. I will have to talk to Kaede to make sure you are cared for while you heal if I am gone."

‘Longer than you think. I have no need for you.’ 

“Everyone always leaves. Should have known you would be the same.”

"Hikari, that isn't fair. I don't really have a choice in the matter. If it was up to me I would stay, at least until you were healed but even as you heal I will train you in the meantime."

“Life isn’t fair Avalon. If it was my parents would still be alive.”

‘She thinks I will come back to her like a dog returning to it’s master. Fool.’ 

Avalon pulls Hikari into a hug. "I know all too well, life isn't fair but we must make the best of it. I will do what I can for you while I am able. Come on, let’s get going before the rain starts pouring down.” Avalon releases her and holds her hand out to her. Hikari takes the offered hand and Avalon pulls her up. Avalon walks back to Kaede’s hut with Hirari following. She keeps her pace slow so the child doesn’t fall again. 

Sesshomaru watches them walk away and wonders if Avalon would be truly generous enough to heal and train the girl. ‘I doubt it.’ Sesshomaru leaps from his hiding spot once they are out of view in search of Jaken.

In the meantime Avalon arrives at Keade’s hut and pulls the flap open to allow Hikari to enter. Kaede is not in the hut and Jaken is absent as well. Avalon hums wondering where they were but knew they would be back once the rain started.

“Hikari, I need to explain what I’m going to be doing and you need to know this is going to be extremely painful,” as she points to her ankle.

Hikari gulps.

“When Kaede returns, I will have her gather a couple of the strongest men in the village. I will tell them to hold your leg and I will pull your foot out of its current position. I will have you drink a large portion of sake but I fear it will still be excruciating. Can you handle that Hikari?”

Hikari’s eyes widen in fear and she swallows. “They...will they hurt me?”

Avalon reaches out and takes hold of Hikari's shoulder, "Do you remember how this happened?" She points to the ankle. "It looks to me as if you had twisted it perhaps while you ran."

She nodded her head. "Ka-chan, she went to the Okashira because they wanted me again and she said she would go first. But then she bit his face and told me to run. They shot arrows at me, but my foot got stuck in some big roots and I fell. When I got loose I slid down a hill into the river." She thumbs her shoulder quietly. "One hit here." Avalon feels sick to her stomach, the girl had been through so much.

"Do you remember the pain when your foot twisted?"

She nods nervously.

"Well unfortunately it healed wrong and I will have to re-injure it so it can heal properly. The pain will be similar. I'm not forcing you here Hikari. I am leaving this up to you but I want you to know what you are in for."

She closes her eyes thinking then asks Avalon, "Do you miss your parents?"

"Hai, very much."

Hikari closes her eyes, "Ka-chan used to watch me run in the rice paddies. She said it was like watching the light dance on the grass. Will I be able to run again?"

"I can't honestly tell you, if it heals they way I hope then hai you could run again."

Hikari smiles rubbing the scar on her face. "You won't let them hurt me? You'll stay with me?"

"Hikari they will only hold you so I can manipulate your ankle. They won't do anything else to you. I won't let them. I promise."

She nods again. "Okay. It hurts to walk on it anyway."

Avalon goes down and hugs her. "But you need to know for the next few months, you will be in pain. It will be just like when it originally happened."

She shrugs her shoulders and says, "it always hurts. Ka-chan used to give me sweet rice when I hurt myself."

"Well I will see if I can get you some when we are done. Now tell me where do you normally stay?"

She smiles again and flings herself against Avalon. "Kaede-sama said you would be like a big sister!"

Avalon huffs. "Kaede-sama is a pain. Where do you stay Hikari?

"In a house with other children who lost their parents. There's five of us. I'm the oldest. There was another girl but Kaede-sama found her a husband, she can't...not for girls like me."

"How old are the other children?"

"Hina is seven and Yui is three and Haru and Kaito are four and five. I make them dinner and watch them at night."

"Will you be able to make them dinner if you can't walk?"

"Maybe not. I guess you can't fix my foot then."

"I didn't say that Hikari, I'm just trying to figure things out. Hina, can she help make dinner?"

"Probably but she usually burns it. What about that green frog that follows you around. He could help me cook!"

Avalon snorts. "I will have to twist his arm."

"What else does he do all day?"

"It isn't what he does, it's what he is willing to do. He is a stubborn baka."

Hikari laughs covering her mouth. "It feels good to laugh again."

"I'm glad you can laugh Hikari, it is a wonderful sound. I won't set your foot today. I will talk with Keade and figure out everything I will need and then I will get you and we will set your foot."

"Okay," she shrugs pushing herself up on her good arm. "I have chores to do. Ka-chan would like you," she says as she walks out the door.

"Stay safe Hikari."

Hikari only snorts, "a little too late for that."

"Shoo before I tan your hide," Avalon says in a joking manner

She tries to run faster only to face plant again and flops her face in the dirt.

Avalon gets up and helps her up. "Hikari, I told you to stay safe. Now listen to your elders, be careful. Are you going to be okay?"

"That was careful, you should see me when it rains." She exhales and walks stiffly. "It always hurts."

"Well once I set your foot I hope this falling will be a thing of the past."

"Thank you Avalon," she smiles again walking away. "They're going to be hungry soon. I have to go."

"Alright." Avalon waves as she walks away. She sits back and thinks of the things she will need and how to care for the girl once she is gone. She has no way to know when Sesshomaru might show up again. “I will have to talk to Kaede.” Avalon sits back waiting for Kaede to show up.

Sesshomaru locates Jaken quickly and lands in front of him.

“Oh Sesshomaru-sama! I am so happy to see you! Are you going to take me away from this wretched place and the ridiculous onna?

Sesshomaru looks down at him. “Ie.” Jaken’s face falls. ”Jaken, I need you to tell me of the girl’s progress.”

“Avalon?”

“Hikari.”

“Hikari, who is that Sesshomaru-sama?”

“Avalon’s new  deshi ( **弟子** apprentice). Give her whatever she asks for unless it is a summons of me. She is not to know I was here. Do you understand?”

“Hai, Sesshomaru-sama.”

With that Sesshomaru leaps through the trees and out of the village undetected.

Avalon nods off waiting for Kaede. When she hears movement of the flap her head lifts up and Kaede walks in followed by Jaken.

Avalon stands to her full height and starts in a condescending tone “Kaede-sama nazi did you bring me the girl? Did you perhaps think I would take pity on her?”

“Ye looked like ye needed a friend.”

“You thought I needed a friend? I have no need for that.”

Kaede responds in an old wisen tone, “Really, Ye seemed very lonely to me.

Jaken pipes in, “Who would want to be friends with her?”

Avalon angrily responds, “Gama damare (Shut up toad).” Continuing on in her condescending tone she says, “Kaede-sama, I am not lonely. I am merely alone. There is a difference. I choose to be the way I am.”

“So ye did not befriend the girl?”

“Ie I did not, I have become much more it seems. I have conceded to be her sensei.”

“What pray tell will ye be will ye be doing?”

“I will teach her self defense. It’s not much but it is what I can offer. I also will be fixing her foot.”

Kaede stares at Avalon in bewilderment. ‘Could the girl really fix her foot?’ “Can ye truly fix her?”

“I can put it back where it should be, but it will be up to her to see how well she recovers.”

“How would ye know of such things.”

“Kaede-sama there are many things I know that others do not. I will not explain how I know them, but I will need help with setting her foot. I also will need help from the villagers taking care of her if I am gone.”

“Nani do ye mean ‘gone’?”

“I do not know when Sesshomaru-sama will return to collect me. I will go with him at that time. So I will need to teach someone how to help her recover should I not be present.”

“I see so ye still intend to leave with the yokai?”

“As hard as it is to understand I would follow him to the ends of the earth and beyond if he would allow me to.”

“Ye are correct I do not understand but I can see there is nothing I can do to convince ye to change your mind.”

“Will you help me with Hikari?”

“Hai, if ye can fix her foot, can ye fix her arm?”

Avalon presses her lips together. The fact that it is numb and limp tells her there is nerve damage. It is likely a break that healed poorly as it was never set. There is nothing she can do about her arm.

Avalon shakes her head, “The arm is beyond my help.”

“Then how will she learn to fight?”

Avalon smiles “One arm is more than enough to fight with.”

Avalon explains what she will need for Hikari and Kaede helps plan it out. They will fix her foot tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo!!!! Let us know how you are surviving isolation :)


	10. A Lord’s Desire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon helps to fix Hikari's foot so she walk normally again, but a nearing Lord sets eyes on Avalon, what happens next?

Avalon awakens the next day in her tree with her thoughts in order. She walks to Kaede’s hut moving the flap and walking right in. Seeing Jaken and Kaede asleep she walks over to Jaken leaning down and gently shakes his shoulder, saying in a gentle voice, “Master Jaken wake up.” 

Jaken wakes with her words, “What do you want onna.” 

Avalon wants to remind him, her name is Avalon but decides a fight isn’t a great idea so she says, “Master Jaken I know Sesshomaru’s dragon is in the forest, I need you to take him and get me a large chunk of ice.” She places her hands together to beg. “Please Master Jaken I really need it for Hikari. Please please please please please please please please ple…” 

“Alright, alright I’m going. “

“Oh, doumo arigatou Master Jaken. Please hurry.”

“I’m going, I’m going.” Jaken hurries out of the hut towards the woods to get the ice Avalon requested. He wasn’t going to tell her, she didn’t need to beg.

Avalon builds up the firepit in the middle of the hut to cook the food. She places the soup from last night on to boil. Kaede wakes with the scent wafting through the hut.

“Avalon ye are up early.”

“Hai, I have sent Jaken for what I can’t get in the village.”

“What was that child?”

“Ice.”

Kaede nods her head. She knows that the cold will soothe pain. Avalon scoops out some soup to give to Kaede and some for herself. They sit eating in silence, when Hikari bursts in holding a white puppy in her hands. Avalon focuses on the cute little puppy in her arms.

“Where did the puppy come from?”

Hikari thinks back to last night. She was laying in bed asleep with the other 4 children, when she felt her arm being lifted. She opened her eyes slowly and saw the demon Avalon came with. She was shocked into silence when Sesshomaru lifted his finger to his lips and then handed her the white little bundle of fluff. He said softly to her, “Call her Jaken and do not tell Avalon I was here.” With that command he departed quietly, leaving her to cuddle with the little puppy. Avalon was right, petting a puppy wasn’t painful.

“I found her in my arms when I woke. I named her Jaken.”

Avalon’s eyes narrow. She knows Hikari is lying. ‘Why?’ Her eyes widen, ‘no, it couldn’t be? He was listening?’ Her cheeks turn slightly pink.

“Avalon are you okay? Your not getting sick are you?”

“Oh, no Hikari I’m fine.” She shakes her head trying to clear her suspicions. “Can I hold her?” Hikari hands Avalon the puppy. Avalon puts her bowl down and holds the small puppy under her front legs looking in the little ones eyes. Gorgeous blue eyes. Avalon recognizes the breed as an Akita. The little pup starts whining so Avalon brings the little one to her chest and starts petting her. “Do not worry little one, you are safe.” Avalon hands the puppy back to Hikari. “I’m glad you have a puppy. Jaken huh? Why call her that?”

“It just came to me.”

Avalon nods her head. Another lie. ‘He is sweet even if he doesn’t want to admit it.’ “So I sent Jaken out to get something we need for your foot. I’m going to go looking for a few things myself. Have you eaten?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay that’s good. Have you fed the puppy?”

Hikari shakes her head, “I wasn’t sure what to feed her.”

Avalon nods and walks over to the dried meat, grabbing a small chunk and handing it to Hikari. “She will want meat most of all but some vegetables are good too. No onions though.” 

Hikari nods and lets the puppy eat the meat Avalon handed her.

“I’m sorry Keade, I need to gather some things so I won’t be able to train today.”

“Hai, child I understand.” Avalon walks around Hikari and out the hut. She heads towards the woods looking for sturdy branches and flexible vines. She needs to make a brace for Hikari for after she sets the ankle and she needs to make a crutch of some sort. After finding what she is looking for, she heads back. Kaede is gone treating villagers and Hikari is no where about. Avalon sits to get working on constructing the brace and crutch. Later Jaken walks in the hut finding Avalon bent over whittling away. “What are you doing?”

Avalon looks up, “Oh, hey, you get the ice block?”

“Hai.”

“Arigato. I’m making a brace for Hikari’s foot.”

Jaken shakes his head as he walks back out of the hut. Avalon puts down her work to check and see what the ice block looks like. Stepping out of the hut, the dragon is right outside waiting with a large block of ice about 2 ft by 2 ft and a ft tall on his back. “

Hey you two.” Avalon pets each head, “Arigato for helping get this ice.” Avalon pulls the large block from the dragons back. She is surprised that it is so large. “Jaken how did you move such a large block?” 

Jaken stops his steps to open his mouth not sure how to answer. Avalon shakes her head. ‘Sesshomaru, you must be around you big softy.’ “Never mind.” Avalon struggles to drag the block into the hut. Once she is finished making the brace and crutch she is ready to set Hikari’s foot. 

Avalon goes out of the hut looking for Kaede. She walks among the villagers and asks as she goes. She finds Kaede tending a young man who has cut his leg. She just finished wrapping the injury as Avalon waits patiently, Kaede explains how to tend the wound. “Kaede-sama I’m ready to set Hikari’s foot but I’m going to need the sake and a few strong men.”

“Hai child, the sake should be there by now and I need only call upon the men.”

“Alright. I’ll go get Hikari.”

“Avalon are ye sure ye know what ye are doing?”

“I do Kaede.” She nods her head in a slight bow and sets off to find Hikari. Avalon sets off towards the small hut she has learned is used by the orphaned children. Avalon knocks on the side as she is met with little yips. “Hikari you there?”

Hikari pops her head out and quickly launches herself into Avalon’s chest knocking her over screaming, “AVALON!!!”

“I guess that is my answer. You seem excited.”

“You’re here to get me so we can fix my foot right?”

“Hai, I have come to bring you to Kaede’s. Kaede told me that Hinata will take care of the other children for a few days so you will be staying with us for that time.”

“Okay, should I bring Jaken then?”

“I would think so.” She smiles down at her. Hikari gets off her and goes in the hut to grab Jaken and then comes back out to follow Avalon back to Kaede’s hut. They slowly make their way to the hut and see a barrel out front. Hikari looks at the barrel, “Avalon what’s the barrel for?”

Avalon looks over at Hikari. “My guess? It's sake for you.”

“Will I have to drink all of it?”

Avalon can’t help but chuckle. “Ie not even close.” They enter the hut, Kaede is there with 3 of the local village men.

“These men have volunteered to help ye Avalon, ye only need tell them what to do.”

“Arigato. First we need Hikari to have some sake.” One of the men walks out the door and comes back with a bottle and cup full of sake. “Here.” He says as he hands it to Avalon. 

“Arigato, what’s your name?” 

“Ren my lady.” Avalon’s cheeks flush being called a lady.

“And what about you two?”

“I am Sho Avaron-sama.”

“Nobu at your service.” Nobu bows his head.

“Have a seat Hikari.” She motions to a raised area she prepared just for this occasion. Once Hikari gets into her seat Avalon hands her the cup of sake. “Here drink this.” Hikari grabs the cup and takes a sip.

“Are you sure I should drink this it burns.”

“I know kiddo, but yeah drink. It will help numb the pain.”

Hikari drinks the cup and Avalon takes her cup to refill it. “Again.”

“Should Jaken have any?” 

Jaken looks up confused but answers, “I wouldn’t mind some.”

“Ie, Jaken should never drink sake. She should only drink water.”

“Excuse me, I’m a male and I will drink sake if I wish.”

“I never said you couldn’t and I know your a guy. What’s your point?”

Jaken shakes his head, “Have you already indulged onna?”

“Ie, I would never when I am doing something so delicate.”

Jaken shakes his head completely confused. 

Hikari starts laughing. “Jaken is funny.”

“Yeah he is. How are you feeling?”

“Umm about the same.”

“Are your lips numb?”

“Ie.”

“Then you need to drink more.” Avalon refills her cup. 

After two more Hikari can feel her cheeks and lips are numb. “Avalon, I can’t feel my cheeks.”

“Good. Hikari now I’m going to have the men grab you but remember they aren’t going to hurt you.”

“Okay.”

Kaede observes Avalon as she instructs the men how to hold Hikari. 

“Ren, I want you to hold her shoulders like this.” Avalon walks over to Hikari’s head grasping her shoulders holding her down on the platform covered in furs. “When I start manipulating the foot she is going to struggle but I need her not to move.” Ren nods and takes his place. “Sho you will need to be on her left here. You will be responsible to hold her arm and leg, just like this.” Avalon grabs Hikari’s wrist pulling it close to her hip and presses her other hand down on her thigh. “Nobu you take her other side and do the same.” Both nod and take their place putting their hands where Avalon told them. Avalon walks over to be by her head brushing her bangs out of her face. “Hikari do you trust me?”

“Hai.”

“This is going to hurt a lot so I want you to bite down on this.” Avalon places a thick piece of leather in between Hikari’s teeth. Hikari bites down. “I apologize for the pain in advance.” 

Kaede moves to get a better view of what Avalon is doing with Hikari’s foot. ‘Tis something I should learn if I can.’

Avalon goes over to her feet and hops up, then kneels over Hikari’s knees with her back to Hikari. “Here goes.” Avalon grabs Hikari’s left foot and places her right hand under Hikari’s achilles tendon and her left on the top of the foot. Holding the foot stable, she pushes with her left hand to push the ankle out of its current position. 

Hikari starts screaming and thrashing about. 

“Hold her still,” Avalon commands and continues with pushing the foot away from her leg till she hears a pop and she moves the foot to the proper position. “Kaede hand me the brace.” She points to the odd wooden contraption with vines.

Kaede grabs it and hands it to her. Avalon places the brace alongside Hikari and wraps rags around the ankle and then places the brace around Hikari’s foot. She tightens the vines to keep the brace in place. She gets up and looks over at Hikari’s. Hikari has tears streaming down her cheeks and patchy redness all over her face. Avalon knocks some of the ice off and crushes it up in her old t-shirt and sets it on the foot to help ease the pain. “I’m so sorry Hikari but the most painful part is over.” She takes the strap of leather from her mouth. “You can let her go guys.”

The men instantly released Hikari as Jaken stares in abject horror. He never knew Avalon could be so cruel. ‘Perhaps I should be more courteous to her.’ Hikari looks at Avalon and gives her a weak smile. The men help lift Hikari to the futon on the ground as Jaken Jr cuddles into her arms. The men leave soon after Avalon and Kaede thank them for the help. 

Jaken slips out with the men. Avalon and Kaede tend Hikari as she rest for the night. 

Jaken makes his way to the outskirts of the village still shaken from watching Avalon torture Hikari. ‘The men just held her down, I have to tell Sesshomaru-sama right away.’ Jaken searches for the dragon he knows will be around. Finding him, Jaken scampers up onto his back “We have to find Sesshomaru-sama.” The dragons take off hearing the urgency in jaken’s voice. Within a few hours they land and Jaken loses his footing rolling off the dragon. “Sesshomaru-sama, I have the most troubling news.”

“Has something befallen Avalon?”

“Ie much worse. Avalon tortured Hikari and the miko watched while men held the girl down.”

“What?” Anger seeps into his voice. He knew Avalon was twisted but why would the miko allow it? ‘The child has experienced enough pain.’ Sesshomaru leaps into the air flying to the village at a breakneck pace to save the girl. He lands outside the village limits and masks his aura. Sneaking into the village, he quickly tracks down Avalon by scent. He peers through the window watching as Avalon walks to the block of ice chipping away some, placing it in a rag then laying it over an odd contraption on Hikari’s foot. He sees her tenderly brush the girl’s bangs back as she pets the new puppy held in Hikari’s arms. ‘It doesn’t look as if she is harming her.’ 

The miko sleeps on her futon. Avalon rises up after a time and grabs the rag setting it aside, then returns to watching the young girl. One thing Sesshomaru could tell for sure was Avalon looked worried. ‘Why would she be worried? Did she make the leg worse?’ He leaves unsure of what to think. He slips into a bush out of sight. He would wait and see what happens next.

When then sun rises the next day Avalon is still awake watching over Hikari and Jaken Jr. Kaede wakes as Avalon is moving about to start making a new pot of soup. “Have ye been up all night child?”

“Hai, I just want to make sure Hikari is okay.”

“Ye need to rest. I will make the soup.”

“Fine, just make sure to replace the ice on her foot every so often but don’t let it sit for too long.” Avalon goes to rest on her futon. Settling in to sleep as Kaede takes over watching everything. No sooner does she close her eyes, she feels as if she had opened them to the noon sun. “Oh my, I really must have been tired.” She looks about finding Hikari is sitting with her foot up playing with Jaken Jr. “How are you doing Hikari?”

“I’m okay but it hurts a lot.”

“I know. I’m sorry but it will get better.”

“I know, are you okay Avalon?”

“I’m fine. How’s our little friend?” Avalon slips out of the futon and crawls over to be next to Hikari. 

“She’s good.”

“Hey, have you been out at all today?”

Hikari shakes her head.

“Well I think it’s time to get out of here, then.”

“But I can’t walk.”

“Who said you had to walk.” Avalon gets down in front of her. “Get on my back.”

Hikari wraps her arms around Avalon’s neck and Avalon grabs her legs to wrap them around her being careful not to jostle her bad leg too much. She keeps her back bent forward so she would minimise the strain on her left shoulder and carried Hikari outside to sit under a tree. She carefully sets her down and turns around to sit in front of her.

“Can we do that some more.”

Avalon frowns, “I wish I could carry you some more but my shoulder is injured so I have to be careful myself but we can play a game.”

“Really.”

“Yup. Have you ever played 20 questions?”

“What’s that.”

“Well you think of something and then I ask you questions up to 20 of them. They are yes or no questions or either or questions. If I can’t guess it in 20 questions you win and I lose. You wanna try?”

“Sure.”

“Alright think of something and I will ask the questions and you have to answer honestly.”

“I got it,” Hikari says. 

“Living or not living?”

“Living.”

“Is it white?”

“Yes.”

“Is it Jaken?”

“Yeah. How did you know?”

“I didn’t I guessed.” Avalon smiles , “Okay my turn.”

“Living or not living.”

“Not living.”

“What color is it?”

“That isn’t a valid question. That isn’t a yes or no and it isn’t an either or. You could ask is it blue or green and I would answer that.”

“Okay is it blue or green?”

“Neither.” Hikari’s face fell she was sure Avalon had given her a clue.

“Is it big or small?”

“Big.”

“Is it close to us?”

“Yup.”

“Is it brown?”

“Yup.”

“Is it Kaede-sama’s hut?”

“You got it Hikari!”

Sesshomaru listens as Avalon plays this 20 questions with Hikari. ‘A child’s game. The girl seems happy.’ 

Avalon soon gets up. “Hikari I will be right back.” Avalon runs into the hut grabbing some more ice and comes back out to place it on Hikari’s foot.

“Why do you keep putting ice on it?”

“It keeps the swelling down, so it will keep the pain away and it will help it heal quicker.”

“Why are you being so nice to me?”

Sesshomaru stifles the need to snort, even he wonders why she would care for the child.

“What do you mean?”

“You pretty much ignore everyone so why me.”

Avalon sits back on her arms trying to figure out how to explain it to her. “Well hmmm I am afraid of getting hurt?”

“Who would hurt you other than that yokai? People are nice here.”

“I…” Avalon huffs “It’s not about them hurting me physically. I worry about getting attached and then something happening to them and then I have to mourn them. I tend to close myself off just so I don’t have to deal with it. Perhaps that’s why I’m so drawn to Sesshomaru-sama. I know nothing will happen to him.”

“That’s just silly.”

‘She knows nothing will happen to this Sesshomaru?’ he ponders the idea then is repulsed because he knows how childish this infatuation with him is. 

“Is it?”

“Hai.”

“If you say so.” She leans over and messes Hikari’s hair up. The rest of the day is spent playing games to distract Hikari and talking about silly things. She would help Hikari go to the bathroom when she needed to, by carrying her and when the sun starts getting low Avalon carries Hikari back into the hut. Sesshomaru slips out of the village when Avalon and Hikari retired to the hut. Avalon spends the night over seeing Hikari. 

The next day Kaede wakes and sees Avalon sleeping sitting up by Hikari with the pup laying in Avalon’s lap. She shakes her head and put some of last night soup on the pit to boil. She sees the block of ice is getting smaller and frowns.’Soon there will not be enough to keep Hikari’s ankle from swelling.’ She looks over and sees Jaken asleep laying on Avalon’s futon. Shaking her head she stirs the pot. Avalon’s eyes crack open. Kaede seeing that says , “Good morning child.”

“Kaede why did the men call me Lady?”

“It was a sign of respect. Ye were doing something none else could.”

“But I’m not a Lady.”

“They see ye as a healer.”

Avalon considers and nods her head.

“Would ye like some soup?”

“Hai that would be great.” Kaede ladles some soup in a bowl handing it to Avalon.

“We need to get back to training ye.”

Avalon looks down at her young charge and replies glumly, “I know.”

“She will be fine Avalon. We can bring her with to watch.”

Avalon’s face brightens a bit then falls again. “Kaede, she can’t walk and I can’t carry her. How can she come along?”

“One of the young men can carry her.”

“Ie, that will not do. They have other duties to attend to and Hikari would feel uncomfortable with a man carrying her. Hmm I know Ah-Un!”

“Ah-Un?”

“Nevermind, please watch her. I will be back soon.”

Kaede nods her head. Avalon sets the puppy down and runs from the hut leaving her food untouched. Kaede shakes her head. ‘I never know with that girl.’

Avalon makes her way out of the village looking for the two headed dragon. She finds him lying in the shade resting. “Hey, how are you guys?” The two heads look at her and huff. Avalon goes to stroke their heads. “Can you help me out?” They look at her suspiciously. “My friend’s foot is messed up, so would you guys mind carrying her?” The dragon gets up and groans. Avalon grabs the reins and leads the dragon into the village stopping in front of Keade’s hut. “Stay here, I’ll be back in a few minutes.” Avalon walks into the hut. She sees Hikari, Kaede, Jaken and Jaken Jr enjoying some soup. “Hey everyone.”

“Avalon come eat with us.” Hikari calls

Avalon joins them in the meal and once everything is cleaned and put away. Avalon states, “So Hikari, how would you like to ride a dragon!”

Hikari looks over with wide eyes with wonderment and fear. “What do you mean?”

Avalon explains, “Well Kaede and I need to train but I won’t leave you alone, so you can ride a dragon, to and from.”

Hikari asks, “Where will the dragon come from?”

Avalon says with a smile, “He is right outside.”

Jaken seethes, “What! You can’t be talking about Sesshomaru-sama’s dragon. That is not acceptable wench.”

Avalon says tersely, “Jaken, it is already done.” Adding softly, “the dragon was happy to assist.”

Jaken says contentiously, “you can’t.”

Avalon answers resolutely, “I have and I did. Besides what’s the harm?”

Jaken bemusedly stutters, “I...it...what..I mean--”

Avalon adds dismissively, “Don’t worry so much.” 

Hikari asks apprehensively, “Is it safe?” 

“Of course Hikari.” Avalon smiles. “Come on, I’ll introduce you.”

Hikari nods. Avalon reaches out to help Hikari up. She places herself on Hikari’s left side to help take her weight off her foot. Hikari hobbles out the door holding onto Avalon for support. Hikari freezes when she sees the large 2 headed dragon looking over at Avalon with horror filled eyes. Avalon looks down to her and smiles. “There is no need to worry. He is quite friendly.” 

Hikari gulps but nods her head with determination. Avalon reaches out to pet one of the heads and the other tries to get a pet as well. Avalon laughs, Hikari’s eyes light up as she sees how friendly the dragon is. Hikari stands on her good leg and reaches out her left hand to pet the heads. Each one nuzzles into her open palm. Hikari laughs at the feel of the scaled noses. “See, I told you they were friendly.” Avalon helps Hikari up onto the saddle. Grabbing the reins Avalon calls, “Hey Kaede you ready to go?”

“Hai, child follow me.” Kaede makes her way out of the hut leading to the forested area they would go to train her in meditation. Once they get there Avalon helps Hikari off the dragon into the shade. Kaede has Avalon take her position and starts with a prayer followed by learning the hand sign for Kai and the mantra, ‘On nōmaku sanmanda basaradan kan.’ For several hours the meditation continues. Kaede guides her along. “It’s enough Avalon go help Hikari. I need to tend the villagers.” 

Avalon slowly opens her eyes and nods her head as Keade begins to walk back to the village leaving Avalon, Hikari and Jaken behind. Avalon gets up walking over to Hikari, “So how you doing?”

“I’m alright.”

“You mind if I have a look at your ankle?”

“Of course.”

Avalon nods her head and holds Hikari’s ankle starting to unwrap the bandages and loosening the vines to pull the brace off. Hikari starts whimpering. “I’m so sorry Hikari but I really need to have a look.” Avalon gently prods the ankle checking the mobility. Avalon smiles when she sees that it moves within a normal range. “This looks good Hikari, it’s moving normally.” Avalon re-bandages the ankle replacing the brace. “I’m sorry that it hurt so much but it looks good. The swelling will go down and then we can start working on you walking on it. But how about I teach you some self defence?”

“Yeah that would be great.”

“Alright we will start with weak spots. Eyes, nose throat and groin.” Hikari nods. “Hitting those areas will give you time to escape. You can use your palm in an upward strike hitting the nose like this.” Avalon demonstrates the move. “Hmm it would help if I had someone to do it on.” Hikari laughs, “I didn’t mean I wanted to hurt them. It just would be easier to show how it works.”

“You could use Jaken.” Hikari offers

“What? No way. I refuse to help in this silly charade,” Jaken says.

Avalon interjects, “I wouldn’t want your help anyway. You are too weak.” 

“What!?” 

Avalon nods. “You’re weak.”

Jaken waves his arms around. “I am not!”

“Sure, whatever anyway let’s see you try Hikari.”

“Okay.” Hikari tries to mimic what Avalon showed her. Avalon demonstrates a few other techniques for her having her mimic them. As the sun crosses the sky sloping towards the horizon Avalon helps Hikari get on the dragon and walks her back to Kaede’s hut. As Avalon lowers Hikari, Kaede peaks her head out. “Soups ready.” Avalon gets down so Hikari can wrap her left arm around her shoulder as Avalon wraps her right arm around the girls waist. Lifting her off the ground. It seemed to be the best way to move about for short distances. They gather for the evening and Avalon watches Hikari for the night once again while Jaken and Kaede sleep. 

Avalon would fall asleep but would keep her ear open if Hikari started to complain and a new routine was born. For the rest of the week Keade taught Avalon the rest of Kuji and Avalon taught Hikari self-defence techniques. The dragon came in handy, since he could carry Hikari. In the evening Avalon would examine and flex Hikari’s ankle. She could tell it was about time for her to start putting pressure on it.

Morning comes and after everyone is ready to go Avalon says, “Hikari, I need you to walk to the dragon.” The dragon has taken up residence right outside the hut so it wasn’t far.

“But Avalon, my foot!” Hikari eyes are huge.

“I know and it will hurt but it’s time to walk on it for brief periods but don’t worry I’m right here and I won’t let you fall.”

Hikari nods as Avalon helps her stand. She steps on her left foot gingerly and hisses in pain. “Avalon it hurts.” A tear trails down her scar. 

“You can do this Hikari. I have faith in you.”

Hikari makes her way out to the dragon with Avalon right by her side with her hands out ready to catch her if she were to stumble but Hikari makes it to the dragon and leans heavily into his side panting.

“You did it Hikari, I’m so proud of you.” Hikari gives Avalon a bright smile

“I did it!”

“Yup you did. Now let’s get you up on the dragon so we can go.”

“Alright.” Avalon helps lift Hikari onto the dragon as Jaken watches still upset that Sesshomaru-sama’s dragon is being used like a common horse.

Kaede becomes frustrated with meditation not working even as she has had Avalon use all nine signs the previous day so she asks, “Do ye know how to use a bow and arrow.” 

Avalon considers, she knew how to and she had some training in it but she felt more comfortable with a sword. “I have used one before.”

“We will train with a bow today.”

“Okay.”

Kaede leads Avalon and the rest of the group to a new area with a bow and arrow strapped to her back. She hands the bow to Avalon and hands her an arrow. “I want ye to draw the bow.” Avalon nods as she notches the arrow in place and draws the bow back. “Now concentrate and aim for the knot in the tree.” 

Avalon nods aiming the arrow while concentrating. Kaede observes her stance and is pleased to see at least that was not something that would need work. Once she is ready she fires the arrow hitting the tree but misses the knot by about 3 inches to the left. Kaede watches with a keen eye. There was no spiritual energy released. She hands Avalon another arrow 

“Again, concentrate harder, think of destroying a yokai with your arrow.” 

Avalon gives her a confused look but does as she asks. She draws the bow  suddenly quirking a brow she thinks with amusement, 'concentrate on destroying a youkai?' Quickly she turns on Jaken, releasing the arrow, aiming to strike at his feet. The arrow penetrates the ground centimeters from Jaken's feet. He screeches, "Are you insane wench? You could have killed me?"

" Lady Kaede told me to concentrate on destroying a yokai." Avalon shrugs her shoulders, "You're a yokai master Jaken are you not?" 

Kaede and Hikari laugh while Jaken fumes,"Sesshomaru-sama will hear of this!"

Using a dismissive tone Avalon says, "Like I care." She turns her back and puts her hand out for another arrow, Kaede hands her one. This time Avalon actually concentrates  thinking of destroying Yōgan. She releases the the arrow hitting the tree. Kaede watches as the arrow flies striking the tree sinking deeply into the wood but still no spiritual power. “Again.” Avalon takes the offered arrow and tries again. After an hour of this, her shoulder really starts to bother her. “Lady Kaede, I can’t do anymore today. My shoulder is hurting too much.”

“Aye child, I agree. It is time to make my rounds with the village anyway.  Ye head back with the girl. ”

They head back towards the village. Kaede heads off to treat the sick. Hikari and Avalon head off to Kaede’s hut . Once finished Keade retires to her hut to prepare for the night. This time Avalon waits till Hikari and Kaede fall asleep noticing Jaken has slipped out. ‘Hmmm I wonder, has he gone to report to Sesshomaru?’ Avalon slips out quietly. She silently slinks through the night feeling for the faint pulls of Jaken’s aura. Finally sensing it she lays down and closes her eyes focusing on sound hoping to hear something. She hears whispers. The wind is blowing in Avalon’s direction carrying Jaken’s and Sesshomaru’s voice to her.

“Sesshomaru-sama I am so sorry I could not stop Avalon.”

“From what?”

“She uses the dragon as a horse to carry her deshi.”

Sesshomaru feels like rolling his eyes, “I care not about it. Tell me of their progress.”

“Oh hai master. Avalon has been training the girl to strike at the eyes, nose, throat and groin.”

Sesshomaru nods. ‘good’ “And the girl’s foot.”

“Oh Avalon seems most cruel she made the girl walk today from the hut to the dragon.”

Sesshomaru nods again, ‘a necessity.’ “Is that all?”

“Hai, but when will you come from me master? Avalon shot an arrow at me today.”

Sesshomaru’s eyes dance with amusement, “You seem to be standing, is the girl such a poor shot?”

“Ie master, she was just aiming by my feet. I feel she was only teasing me for she could strike a tree 100 yards away.”

“If there is nothing else.” Sesshomaru turns to leave Jaken behind.

“Farewell master.”

Avalon listens intently only catching bits and pieces, mostly Jaken’s whines but she could her bits of Sesshomaru speaking. Her heart leaps in her chest, part of her wants to run out and greet him but she stays where she is at. She knows now Sesshomaru is checking on things. She was right. Avalon gets up and slips away climbing her tree once again to ponder what it means that Sesshomaru was checking up on things. ‘Should I confront Jaken or should I try to trap Sesshomaru? Jaken would fess up under pressure but I wouldn’t gain anything. But if I could corner Sesshomaru, he would still lie and say some bullshit. He cares, I guess that will just have to be enough.’

Once Avalon comes back the next morning, Kaede decides to ask her about it, “Avalon where do ye go at night sometimes?”

“Gomen Kaede-sama, I can’t sleep in the hut. So I go to sleep in a tree at night.”

“Naze?”

“I feel too confined at times.”

“I see.”

The morning ritual begins again once everything is cleaned Avalon confesses that she can’t draw a bow again today, her shoulder is still hurting too much. Kaede understands so Keade go to tend the village instead while Avalon cares for Hikari. It turns out there’s a wedding today. Avalon watches the ceremony in the back trying to stay unnoticed as Hikari sits with the other children she lives with. Once the ceremony is over a party is held. The whole village is to attend so Avalon is forced into the celebration. Hariki is enjoying her time with her pseudo-siblings. Avalon hasn’t really seen them much but it was fun to be at a celebration. 

Avalon was sitting with them when one of the young men approaches her. Avalon looks at him. He isn’t bad looking but she isn’t interested. “Such a beautiful lady, will you join me for a dance?” Hikari pushes Avalon to join him and gives her a wink. Avalon rolls her eyes and shakes her head.

Avalon doesn’t want to be rude but she doesn’t like being touched by men though Sesshomaru was different. Her cheeks flush thinking of him and the way he would touch her at times. 

The young man thinks the blush is for him. 

“I will dance with you.” 

“Yeah go Avalon!”

The man pulls her up from her seat into himself and starts to dance with her. Avalon feels herself beginning to panic with the close contact. She concentrates on keeping the panic under control. When his hand slips down to her backside, she gets angry. She pushes against the man’s chest hissing at him, “Let me go.”

The man pulls her closer against him. “Don’t worry, I will make a fine husband for you.”

“I don’t want you as a husband.”

He has led her away from the crowd with their dancing and there is no one around. 

Avalon hadn’t realized it because she was too focused on avoiding panicking while they danced.

“Would you prefer that yokai?” he says in an evil tone.

“That isn’t your concern.” She still tries to push him away from her when her back is slammed into a tree.

“I don’t care that you were his whore. I will make you into my wife.”

“I wasn’t his whore and I won’t be your wife.”

His hands starts pulling at her robes exposing her collar bone. ”Come on. I can please you just like he has.”

“You don’t know what you are talking about and you really don’t want to continue if you know what's good for you,” she threatens.

He buries his head into the side of her neck as he forces his knee between her legs. He pushes her robes apart below her waist pushing his hand in trying to reach her opening. He bites down on her neck. Avalon screams in pain. She has had enough. She uses her knee to hit him in the balls. He releases her to cup his injured genitalia in his hands. Avalon takes the opportunity to grab his head between her hands and brings her knee up into his nose breaking it. He gasps in pain. She roundhouse kicks him to knock him down. She escapes him and heads back to the party. Her hair is a mess, her clothing is in disarray and the side of her neck is bleeding. 

Kaede seeing her in such a state, cries in dismay, “Avalon, what has happened?” 

Avalon looks at Kaede  as tears start falling from her eyes she turns and runs away. She heads to the tree that she would normally climb. She doesn’t want to talk to anyone. Avalon brings her hand to her neck and pulls away seeing blood. “Shit!” Avalon climbs down and heads to Keade’s hut. She needs to rinse the wound thoroughly since there is so much bacteria in a human mouth. She washes and washes again and prays it doesn’t get infected. She grabs the herbs that are used for fighting infections and crushes them into a paste and begins to bandage her neck. 

Meanwhile, Kaede backtracks Avalon’s path finding an unconscious young man. Kaede rushes to check on him and finds he is alive but has a broken nose. ‘What has happened here?’ She doesn’t recognize the man he must be from the bride's side. She was not from the village. The man starts to stir while Kaede looks down at him, “What has happened?” she asks the man.

“I was going to make the yokai’s whore my wife. But now she can rot,” he spits bitterly. 

Kaede shakes her head. ‘Avalon would never want this man at least not right now. She seems set on traveling with the yokai.’ “Ye would be wise to avoid her and leave the village as soon as ye are able.” 

Kaede turns around and leaves the man to his own devices it became all too obvious what had happened. ‘I hope the yokai does not consider this, not keeping her safe.’ Kaede heads to her hut in search of Avalon and finds her in the back corner bandaging her neck. “Child let me see.” 

Avalon looks over at her with tears still in her eyes but drops the cloth to allow her to see. Kaede lights a candle as the sun had set long ago. She tilts Avalons head to the side as she hisses. Keade’s eye goes wide seeing the deep bite mark on her neck. There was no doubt now. Kaede shakes her head and continues to bandage the wound. Once done she looks at Avalon, “Do ye wish to talk about this?” 

Avalon closes her eyes and shakes her head no. 

Jaken comes back into the hut wondering where Avalon had gone. Finding her with a bandage on her neck, he wonders at what had happened. “Onna why is your neck bandaged?”

Avalon looks over at Jaken then closes her eyes and retreats to the corner, ignoring his question. “The young man will leave the village soon. Ye need not worry.” 

Avalon nods and shuffles to the side of the hut to retrieve her katana that she had left for the party. She will not be left vulnerable again. She heads back to the celebration to get Hikari. She will not leave her alone with a creep around. Finding her sitting with her pseudo-siblings she reaches out her hand. “We are leaving.”

Hikari looks up and sees the bandage on Avalons nack, “What happened?” 

“The young man was not nice. Now let’s go.”

Hikari nods taking Avalon’s hand. Avalon carries her bridal style to the dragon and sets her on him. She takes the reins and leads them back to Kaede’s hut. The nighttime routine goes as normal however she remains in the hut for the night, not wanting to risk running into the young man again or any other that might think they could take advantage of her. She falls asleep, eventually laying in her futon. 

The next day is dedicated to her training with the bow again but no result other than an improvement with her aim. Kaede is becoming frustrated by the lack of miko power surfacing. 

The week progresses in much the same way, practicing with the bow, treating villagers and returning to the hut at night. However Hikari needed to return to caring for the other children. She is able to walk with the crutch Avalon made for her and Avalon gave her exercises for her ankle to strengthen it. 

Keade wonders if a purification ritual might help so she leads Avalon to a waterfall and instructed her to sit under the flow. “Lady Kaede how will this help me train?” 

Kaede groans. “Just go, I will let ye know when ye can leave. The little yokai will remain and watch ye while I tend to the villagers.” 

“I...what?” Jaken squacked. 

“Ye will stay and watch her. Keep her safe.” Kaede says in a serious tone.

“Okay.” 

Though Avalon has her doubts, she strips to her nagajuban and steps below the falls allowing the water to flow over her body. “Lady Kaede the water is freezing!” 

“Concentrate Avalon ye can do this.  Sit get comfortable. Then I need ye to meditate. ”

“If I get sick I’m blaming you, besides how is this supposed to help me fight? I get training with the bow but this .”  Avalon motions at the water flowing over her body.

Kaede sighs this the 2nd time today she has asked. She had hoped Avalon's spiritual powers would surface before she had to tell her, "This will toughen ye up child, endurance." 

Avalon presses her lips together and has a scowl on her face but s he remains under the water. Avalon allows herself to go into a meditative state ignoring the cold seeping into her flesh.  Kaede heads to the village to tend them.

Jaken watches her for the day until Kaede returns. 

“Avalon ye can get out of the water now. “ 

Avalon’s eyes slowly open as she looks over at Kaede. She moves to get up but she is stiff from the cold and staying still for so long but she makes her way back to the shore. Kaede hands her a blanket and allows her to dry off. Avalon shivers as her body tries to warm itself. 

Once she is dry enough she dresses again with minimal help from Keade. She had learned from Kaede how to do it but she was so stiff it was hard to move. Avalon follows Kaede back to the village as the sun starts to set with Jaken trailing behind. When Avalon enters the hut she moves to the back of the room and pulls a futon out and sets it up to sleep. She lays down and cuddles into the mat and uses the blankets available to warm herself.

Kaede says nothing as she makes food for everyone. She goes to hand Avalon a bowl but realizes she is asleep. Shaking her head, she pours it back into the pot. Kaede and Jaken settle for the night and fall asleep. 

Another week passes with no reiki making itself known to Avalon or Kaede. Kaede just can’t understand. She knew the rock had reiki but she just couldn’t get it to surface. Kaede decides today would be about taking care of the villagers. The morning is the same, eat, clean and head out but as they exit the hut a disturbance is heard. 

Kaede looks to see what is going on and sees a platoon of men and an enclosed palanquin. Kaede realizes a Lord is visiting the village and goes to meet them while Avalon follows behind wondering who is visiting. The men stop their march, setting the palanquin down and out steps a handsome man with brown eyes, long black hair and pale skin. Avalon stops in her tracks and turns slowly attempting to blend in with the people around her. Keade greets the man, “My Lord, how can I be of service?” 

The man’s eyes scan over the crowd looking for a specific person when he sees a woman with her back turned and slinking into the crowd. “You, young lass, halt!” 

Avalon continues her retreat hoping it isn’t her that the man is shouting at. “I said halt!” She stops knowing he was speaking to her. “Come here.” 

Avalon turns but keeps her head down and makes her way back. “My Lord what do ye wish of the young woman?” 

The man regards Kaede. “I only wish to look upon her and speak to her. I have heard of a foreigner with unparalleled beauty.” 

Avalon’s heart is beating a million miles an hour. She is now in front of the Lord. “Look at me.” Avalon slowly lifts her eyes to meet his gaze. “I see I was not lied to. What is your name young lass?”

Avalon gulps. “Ava.”

“What a beautiful name. I am Lord Kagewaki.” Kagewaki reaches to grasp Avalon’s face and bring it closer to his. “Your eyes are stunning,  green and blue with streaks of silver magnificent ,”  he says in reverence. 

“Thank you Lord Kagewaki.” 

He caresses her face causing Avalon’s stomach to twist.  Avalon doesn't  want him touching her. Kagewaki leans down to speak into her ear. “Where is your husband?”

“I never married.”

Kagewaki smiles. “I want you to accompany me to my castle and join me.” Kagewaki can feel the darkness within Avalon along with the hidden power residing there. ‘I will have use for her. She is unattached and darkness clouds her heart. I need only charm her and she will do my bidding. ’ 

Avalon's heart sinks. 'He is a Lord, how can I refuse?' she quickly thinks and replies,  “I must decline. I am to remain here and I am happy here within this village.” 

“Ava, I feel you are not telling the whole truth.”

“I do not know what to tell you Lord Kagewaki.”

"Walk with me." Kagewaki's hand drops to grab hers, bringing it up to wrap it around his elbow. He guides them to the outskirts of the village away from prying eyes and ears. Avalon follows but has her left hand on her katana. She does not trust this Lord Kagewaki. "Tell me Ava, you do not seem like a simple village girl. Why stay? I can help you escape if you are a prisoner here."

"I am here by choice Lord Kagewaki."

"I still must insist you join me. Tonight my man will come and rescue you from here and you will come join me at my castle .”

“Lord Kagewaki, I must protest.”

“Nonsense, you do not belong in such a place. Now come along and act as if nothing will happen.”

Avalon nods her head.  Kagewaki leads her back while Avalon is considering her options  once Kagewaki releases his hold on her hand she slips it off his arm and returns to Keade’s side and Lord Kagewaki  steps to his palanquin announcing, “We return home.” Hopping back into it he looks over at Avalon giving her a charming smile and disappears behind the curtain. His men lift the palanquin and make their way out of the village. 

Kaede watches the men leave and turns to Avalon. “Lord Kagewaki seemed most interested in ye.”

“Hai, he did.” Avalon turns and heads back to the hut. She knows she can’t escape the town and leave the village to suffer the wrath of a Lord. She sits in the back of the hut pondering what to do. Sighing she says aloud, “I have no choice.” She packs her little pack around her waist. She will wait and leave without incident but Jaken will need to know that she is to be kidnapped. 

That night she drugs Kaede to make her sleep soundly while the kidnapping will happen. She doesn’t want anything to happen to her and she set herself close to Jaken to wake him when whoever will come and take her. As she lays waiting a man dressed in a baboon pelt enters the hut silently.

Avalon instantly screams recognizing him, she thinks 'Naraku!’ She kicks Jaken to wake him . Jaken wakes complaining about being kicked when he looks over at Avalon and watches as she is being dragged out of the hut with her mouth covered. Jaken says, “I will save you.” He rushes out after her and tries to stop the strange man but the man produces a miasma spraying it in Jaken’s face causing him to pass out. The man easily jumps up with Avalon and makes his way out of the village without further incident. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE COMMENT, KUDO, let us know how you are surviving isolation. We love you! Thank you for reading!


	11. Murasaki no Raikō (紫の雷光)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon discovers her purpose and Naraku's plan for her. Sesshomaru's rage prevents him from seeing the truth behind who he is meant to be.

In the forest he sets Avalon down in front of Lord Kagewaki. “Ah Ava, I am pleased to see you. You were not harmed by my friend here?” 

Avalon shakes her head no.

“Good. This is Naraku. His is a trusted advisor and he will be accompanying us back to my castle. Do you know how to ride?” Kagewaki points to the 3 horses waiting for them. 

Avalon finally finds her voice, “Hai, I do.” 

Kagewaki smiles at her grabbing her hand, leading her to the horse, he wraps his hands around her waist lifting her to place her on the horse. Avalon grabs the reins. Kagewaki jumps up on his horse and Naraku gets up on his. 

Lord Kagewaki says, “Come on.” 

Avalon follows Kagewaki, while Naraku trails behind her. She thinks back to how the Lord tricked Sango. Why hadn't she realized sooner, not that it would do any good but at least she knew her instincts were right not to trust the man. Avalon remains silent, thinking, not really sure what to say or do. She just hopes Jaken can find Sesshomaru quickly and that he will decide to save her. Avalon lowers her head following. Kagewaki sees her down trodden appearance and wants to get her to open up. He has to get her trust. He slows his horse to ride beside Avalon. “Ava.” Avalon looks up and to the left hearing her name. “Hai Lord Kagewaki.”

“Please just call me Kagewaki.”

“Very well.”

“Ava what is wrong.”

“I am unsure of why I am here.”

“You need not worry. You will like life at the castle. You will be treated like a queen.”

Avalon laughs “And why would that be?”

“Because I will have you treated that way.”

“Does that mean you intent to marry me?”

Kagewaki laughs with humor. “That, I cannot say but I do want your company. You are a most interesting and beautiful woman.”

Avalon shakes her head. She just needs to bide her time and not piss him off and hope Sesshomaru will come.

“Ava tell me about yourself?”

“What do you want to know, Kagewaki?”

“Where are you from?”

“Not here.”

“You don’t want to share?”

“Forgive me, but I don’t know you very well Kagewaki so I am hesitant to share my history with you.”

Kagewaki nods his head, “Wise of you. Perhaps I will tell you about myself and then you can tell me about yourself.”

“Perhaps.”

For the next few hours Kagewaki tells her of his childhood, his family and other interesting stories. Kagewaki eyes widen suddenly flinging his hand out to block Avalon, “Avalon get back!” Naraku rushes to position himself beside Kagewaki and in front of Avalon. The ground shakes as two large ogres run out of the woods heading straight for them. Naraku pulls his sword out and Kagewaki raises his blade as well. They rush forward to meet the approaching ogres and slash them, cutting deep into their sides. The ogres scream as they clutch their sides and Naraku and Kagewaki move to behead them as they bend over, quickly dispatching them. Avalon watches them while keeping herself out of the way. Once Kagewaki and Naraku return, Kagewaki could tell something was bothering her. “Ava what is the matter?”

“I do not like being so useless. I want to be able to kill yokai.”

Kagewaki hums in agreement and consideration. “I might have a solution for you.”

Avalon lifts her eyebrow at him. “Oh?” ‘Could I use it to escape Naraku or at least buy some time for Sesshomaru to find me?’

“There is a temple not far from here that has a sword. If you are worthy of it, the sword is very powerful. Perhaps you are the one who will wield it.”

“I don’t see why it would be meant for me.”

“There is only one way to find out. Come, we will arrive by sunrise.”

“But Kagewaki…”

“No buts Ava. You are going to try to collect the sword. It will not harm you to try.”

Avalon presses her lips together, ‘but what will it cost for me to wield it? And why do you want me to have it Naraku?’

Kagewaki thinks to himself, ‘If she can obtain the sword I will make her fall for me and do my bidding.’ An evil smirk crosses Kagewaki’s face but Avalon cannot see it as he leads her along trying to make small talk but she isn’t saying anything worth knowing. 

It frustrates Naraku that she keeps her secrets and would not open up but he figures in time he will gain her trust as Kagewaki is the perfect vessel. ‘He’s handsome and a Lord, what onna wouldn’t fall for his charm.’ Avalon sees a large stone square structure. As they draw closer she sees a stair case. Four monks with shaved heads wearing black and brown robes set out to greet their visitors. “Have you come to attempt to claim the sword?”

“Hai, this onna will be the one,” Kagewaki exclaimes.

“Is she prepared?”

“Hai.”

“Then enter to see if you are worthy of Murasaki no Raikō ( **紫の雷光** Purple Lightning).” Kagewaki rounds on Avalon grasping her hands. “Ava, we will wait out here for you. I have faith in you.” He bends and kisses her hands. 

Avalon nods and slides off her horse, tying it’s reins to a tree. Avalon slowly steps up to the stairs. 8 steps for luck. She follows the monks inside. In the middle of the floor is a slab with a katana with purple streaks going along the blade. The hilt is wrapped in black cloth with a gold tsuba and kashira. In front of the slab is a large red cushion the size of a human. Avalon finds the set up odd.

“So I just grab the sword?

“Hai.” One of the monks spoke.

Avalon steps onto the cushion and grabs the hilt. Her hand locks on the tsuka as she falls down screaming in agony. The monks watch with amazement as the sword comes out of the slab. “Now will she go mad?” The other 3 monks nod knowing the question was all too valid. Not only would she confront her sins but she would experience every battle and death the blade has been in as if she was the wielder.

Meanwhile Hikari wakes in the morning then goes to ride the dragon to visit Avalon. She’s surprised when she sees Jaken outside asleep. She slides of the dragon shaking him. “JAKEN-SAMA WAKE UP!”

Jaken wakes, remembering what happened. “Avalon’s been abducted!” He quickly gets out of Hikari’s grasp and goes into the hut to wake Kaede. He shakes her and screams, “Wake up Miko, Avalon has been abducted!” Kaede wakes gradually, she is too groggy. Something isn’t right, she had slept too soundly but she cannot figure out what. Jaken leaves the hut and rushes over to the dragon finding Hikari on the dragon waiting for him. “Get off silly girl, I must find Sesshomaru-sama!”

“I’m coming with, we have to save Avalon.”

“Ie, you stay here silly girl.”

“Master Jaken we don’t have time to argue! Let’s go!”

Jaken gripes but sits in front of the girl. “We must find Sesshomaru-sama! Quickly beast! We do not know what danger she is in.” The dragon growls in agitation jumping into the air flying towards the scent of Sesshomaru. They soon come upon the dai yokai overlooking a cliff. They land right next to him. Hikari looks at him in awe of his presence. She has never been this close and being this close, she can see the unnatural beauty he possesses. ‘No wonder Avalon’s so taken with him.’

Sesshomaru looks at the group disinterestedly but he is wondering why the girl is there. “Sesshomaru-sama! Avalon has been kidnapped!”

Hikari bows her head. “Please save her and keep her safe Sesshomaru-sama.”

Sesshomaru’s eyes narrow at the news, “What happened?”

“Last night a yokai came and grabbed her.”

“And you failed to protect her?”

“Hai my Lord, I tried to save her but the yokai produced a strong miasma that knocked me unconscious.”

Sesshomaru nods his head. “Jaken you will come with me, girl, head back to the village.”

Hikari looks up. “You will save her and keep her safe right?”

Sesshomaru nods and takes off. Jaken jumps on Sesshomaru’s pelt. The dragon takes to the sky heading to Kaede’s village.

Avalon’s agonizing screams fill the temple as she is faced with killing Brandon. She never told anyone of her rape and when she returns to school, he is acting as if everything is fine.

She resolved to kill him. She runs in his social circle and flirts with him even more than before. She joins a martial arts class to gain strength and skill. After several months she comes up with the perfect plan. 

She has Brandon meet her at 11pm a local lake that many of the teens swim at. They strip to their bathing suits and wrestle on the pier. To anyone watching it looks like two teens having a good time. 

Avalon shifts her weight causing Brandon’s head to collide with a pole and then she pushes him over and falls with him into the water laughing as if it was a great time but Brandon is out cold. He quickly sinks as Avalon comes up wiping her face. She looks around. “Brandon?” 

She swims in a circle not seeing him, her cry becomes more strained, “Brandon?!” 

She takes a deep breath and dives under to find his body. She quickly locates him and checks his pulse under water. She smiles to herself as there isn’t one. Holding her breath as long as she can, she comes back up leaving him at the bottom. She takes a deep breath once she breaches the surface and screams. “BRANDON!” 

Taking a few more deep breaths she dives down. Again finding his body she rechecks his pulse pleased to find there is none. She comes back up. “HELP! SOMEONE PLEASE! OH GOD BRANDON!” She dives down again finally dragging him from the depths of the water. 

“HELP! SOMEONE! ANYONE! BRANDON WAKE UP! PLEASE WAKE UP!” She looks at his pale face. She rushes to her bag grabbing her cell phone and dials 9-1-1.

“911 what’s the location of your emergency?”

“Shabbona Lake. Oh God he isn’t breathing!”

“Miss I need you to remain calm. I need you to tell me what happened.”

“I... we... the pier and the water and I couldn’t find him.”

“Slow down, ‘he’? Did he drown?”

“Yesss.” The voice is agonizingly painful.

“Can you feel a pulse?”

“Nnnooo.”

“Do you know CPR?”

“I do.”

“I need you to put the phone on speakerphone and start performing CPR on him.”

“Okay.”

Avalon starts to pump his heart with forceful thrusts, breaking a rib. She smiles inside.

“Oh GOD something broke. Should I stop? What do I do?”

“No, you are doing a good job Miss. Keep going.”

“Oh okay.” She says unsurely

She pumps her arms over his chest using no force to simply look like she is doing what she needs to.

“Tell me your name Miss.”

“Avalon. Why won’t he start breathing?”

“Avalon I need you to focus. How many times have you pumped his chest?”

“I lost count.”

“I want you to give him two breaths.”

Avalon leans down pushing his head back and places her finger and thumb over his nose. Breathing two breaths. She goes back to pumping his chest.

“Are you by the camp store or bait shop?”

“The camp store.”

“The ambulance will be there soon to help you but remain on the line with me until they arrive.”

“Okay.” Tears fill her eyes and her voice is thick with grief. Soon Avalon sees the red and blue flashing lights. 

“They're here. Oh thank God. They have to save him.”

Several paramedics rush to Avalon’s side pushing her away so they can take over.

“Avalon, you can hang up the phone now if you wish.”

“Oh okay.”

The paramedics work on him for several minutes and the police interview Avalon to figure out what happened. She explains how they were playing around on the pier and how they fell in and she couldn’t find him until she went under several times and finally dragged him out and called 9-1-1. The officers believe her story, it seemed plausible. 

When the paramedics lose hope of saving the boy and step away, Avalon runs to them screaming, “NO!” 

The officers stop her. She sobs into one officers chest, sobbing that he couldn’t be dead. 

Life goes on. 

A funeral is held. 

It was thought of as a horrible, tragic accident in fact fellow students apologized to Avalon for the loss. They knew how close she had become to Brandon and she was there to witness the whole thing. No one really blamed her. 

The memory plays over and over again in Avalon’s head as the guilt weighs down on her. After she killed him she acted like everything was normal but she always felt a heavy weight. She tortured herself with his deathly image. She couldn’t understand how she could have afterwards. She knew it was wrong and she was a murder, plain and simple never to be forgiven for her sin. 

The memory finally stops when Avalon finally realizes she needed to forgive herself. 

Then the battles start to play before her eyes and the deaths of the previous owners of the sword. 

Ava lays unconscious screaming in anguish. Naraku smiles hearing the tormented screams. He knows that meant Ava had taken possession of the sword. ‘She is so close to being in my grasp, a miko with the power of Murasaki no Raikō.’ As he is thinking this, he feels a powerful demonic aura approaching quickly. It writhes with fury. Naraku doesn’t know the meaning of it but doesn’t want to face it, so he flees with his horse and his puppet in tow. 

Sesshomaru comes flying towards the temple with Jaken on his fur pelt. He stops at the entrance to kick Jaken off. He enters seeing Avalon’s prone form laying with a sword in hand, screaming with tears streaming down her face. He goes to her side. 

“Do not approach.” one of the monks warns. 

Sesshomaru ignores him and moves to grab Avalon hitting a purple barrier that sends him back several feet. Sesshomaru comes close again cautiously. “How long has she been like this?”

“Several hours.” one monk offers. 

He looks at her tormented face. “How much longer?”

‘We do not know.”

“Make it stop.”

“We can not.” One monk speaks. 

“It is a trial.” Another monk says. 

“She must pass.” A third monk says.

Sesshomaru hums. “She will pass.” He watches her suffering, hearing her screams as the hours pass. Jaken joins his Master listening to the unending screams. 

Avalon stands in the woods surrounded by 5 large oni. 

“You cannot kill us all Akira.” The green one sneers

“You may have killed our younger brother but he was weak.” The red one taunts.

“I will enjoy feasting on your flesh.” The brown one says as his hands clasp together.

“Can I keep the sword brothers?” The blue one asks. He is the smallest of the group.

“Of course, we don’t want it.” The other brown one says

The oni converge on her. She slashes cutting the red one in half. She quickly turns to intercept the green one and stabs him through but then her back feels like it explodes as she looks down there is a blue hand through her chest. The blood pours out as pain and life fade away.

Avalon holds a barrier up using the sword, with blood dripping down her right arm that is grasping the sword. She looks at her arm and sees it is a man’s arm. She/he is surrounded by hundreds of yokai. They each approach and are repealed by the barrier. The blood keeps coming, she realizes that an artery is punctured but she doesn’t have any control over what is happening. She again watches as her/his life fades away, when she/he is too weak to hold the sword, the barrier drops and the yokai swoop in and start eating her/him alive. She/he screams each time one bites into her/his flesh until life fades away.

Avalon wakes suddenly sitting up gasping for breath, sensing Sesshomaru next to her. She sees the sword in her hand, then turns to see Sesshomaru looking at her concerned. She drops the sword on the cushion she is laying on in the temple. “You came?”

He eyes her curiously. "Why did you try to take the sword?"

"I am tired of being defenseless”

"The demon who led you here was evil and you knew it. Did you plan on betraying me?"

"Why would that have to do with me betraying you? I only meant to acquire the sword to escape him."

He stalks towards her, eyes aflame taking her by the chin. "What will you do with this sword?"

"Use it to fight my enemies, your enemies. I would never use it to harm you."

He laughs. "Such a desperate human to please this Sesshomaru. Do you think nothing of yourself? Nothing of the home you left behind? Do you understand the evil you will face if you stay here?" He closes the distance making her heart flutter.

"I don't know how to get back, so why not accept where I am at? I want to be by your side Sesshomaru."

"Why? Is this a crush?" he speaks quietly.

Avalon shakes her head. "I don't know what this is, but I know I would follow you to the ends of the earth if you allowed me to."

His thumbs slides along her chin as he rests his forehead against hers. "Then follow me and leave the blade, we will not need it." Sesshomaru rises up and walks to the temple door exiting. 

Avalon gets up and looks down at her blade lying on the cushion for a moment then leaves it there and rushes out after him.

Sesshomaru turns around to watch as Avalon runs through the temple doors. He allows her to embrace him and holds her in his arms as he creates his yoki cloud, flying off. Avalon clings to him finally feeling safe in his embrace. After a little while, he sets down by an exquisite grotto and leads her into the cave around the water. He unties his obi and removes his pelt and armor. “Avalon, how are you feeling?”

“I’m alright, now that I’m here with you.” Avalon snuggles into his chest, smelling his familiar scent and can’t help but sigh contently, ‘He’s here.’ She looks up into his golden orbs and her heart melts. She can’t help but be thrilled to be here with him. “I never wanted to leave you.”

“I know.” Sesshomaru cups Avalon’s face and brings it up to meet his lips. The kiss is sweet at first but becomes more demanding. Avalon presses her lips harder into his, welcoming the feel. She opens her mouth to allow him entrance, he slips his tongue in to explore and taste. His hands move along her body as her hand moves to his shoulders pushing under the fabric to feel his skin. Sesshomaru breaks the kiss and backs away to look at her face.

“Avalon if this continues, I don’t think I will be able to stop myself.”

“Then don’t.” She rushes up to meet his lips in a fierce kiss. She had missed him and all her body and mind want is him. He grabs at her obi to undo it and pushes her kimono and juban down exposing her shoulders and breasts. He pushes her down on her back giving her hot open mouth kisses on her neck, then moves down to her collar bone and then to her right breast. He takes her hardened nipple into his mouth and sucks, flicking the nub with his tongue. Avalon gasps and pants at the way it feels. It is amazing and her desire only grows as his hand gives her other breast a squeeze. He pulls away from the right breast and quickly takes her left breast into his wanting mouth, giving it the same attention. He slides his hand down her abdomen along her hip. He brushes the pad of his thumb over her hard clit rubbing circles. Avalon bucks into his hand. By the gods, she wants more. She spreads her legs to allow him better access. 

He slides two fingers into her, pumping them in and out. Each time he goes in, he pushes on her clit with his thumb, dragging it backwards as he pulls out. 

Avalon bucks and pushes her hips into his hand. She whines out of breath, “Sesshomaru I want all of you, please!”

“Are you sure Avalon?”

She nods her head. Sesshomaru pulls his fingers from her bringing them to his lips, licking them clean. Avalon watches intently at the way his tongue moves over them. He pulls his hakama off. He moves to line himself up and thrusts into her, burying himself to the hilt in her folds. Avalon gasps in pain and pleasure. He stays still to allow her to adjust to his large size. 

She brings her legs up to get more comfortable and wraps her arms around his shoulders.

Sesshomaru can feel her open more to him as she relaxes accommodating him.

“Are you ready to continue?”

Avalon nods and Sesshomaru pulls out almost completely then thrusts back in again. Avalon gasps at the force he uses because of the pain. He pulls out again slamming into her. “Ahh.”

He does it once again, using even more force. It jolts her body but he holds her shoulders keeping her firmly in place. “Sesshomaru not so rough.”

“Hmm.” He covers her mouth to kiss her as he pushes himself in and out of her more gently but he soon uses more force, kissing her to swallow her gasps of pain. He speeds up slamming into her over and over again. 

Avalon screams but it is muffled by him kissing her. He finally releases her mouth as he pounds into her at an inhuman speed. She screams. “Please! Stop Sesshomaru!” 

He brings his mouth down to her shoulder biting down drawing blood and claws into her back leaving deep gouges. Avalon looks over and sees his markings have become jagged and his eyes are red. Her eyes widen in fear seeing him transforming before her. He laps at the blood from her shoulder as she screams in agony and he pounds into her flesh. She can feel her opening being torn apart. She can feel her pelvic bone being crushed by Sesshomaru’s thrusts.

He drags his fingers through the flesh of her back. When the blood stops flowing freely and clots on her shoulder, he bites down again to let the blood bloom in droves. He is merciless as he pounds away. 

Her screams eventually cease but her tears still flow. She lays looking at the ceiling of the cave waiting for him to finish. Finally, with one last thrust she feels his seed fill her and he grunts his release.

He stands up looking down at her and flicks his fingers clean of her blood speaking in a patronizing tone “You wanted a demon lover. Is it too much for your pathetic ningen body?” 

Avalon doesn’t respond, she hears what he says and can see a teary image of him standing over her.

“You know, you look so tempting, I think I will have another go with you.”

Avalon’s eyes harden and she holds out her hand trying to summon the sword like she learned from the many battles she witnessed. It taught her how to use the sword.

“Are you trying to summon Murasaki no Raikō?” His voice drips with arrogance, “Do you think you are worthy of such a blade? You are pathetic Avalon. You are a whore, look how easy it was for me to have you spread your legs.” 

Avalon’s rage seethes. She has had enough. He assaults her in the throws of passion and now has the nerve to belittle her. She knows the sword chose her for a reason. She doesn’t know exactly why, but it means she is worthy of calling it to aid her. 

Sesshomaru continues with his verbal assault, “You will never amount to anything but a bringer of death. You enjoyed causing Brandon’s death Avalon. His blood is on your hands and you reveled in it. Your soul is polluted and your life is meaningless. I will have my fill of you and be done with you. You are nothing to me.”

Her rage stops as her guilt consumes her. “I am so sorry for killing him. If I could go back I would. I’m sorry.” Her tears flow. 

“No you wouldn’t. You would kill him again. You enjoy killing. You’re a murder.”

“I am a murder, but I don’t want to be one! You’re wrong! I wish I could change it.”

“Do you? I doubt that. He raped you, why would you care?”

“It was in the past, I had no right to end his life. I was a foolish teenager. I can never take it back but I can move forward. God I’m so sorry Brandon, you were just a teenager too.” She tilts her head back. 

“You killed the one who raped you when you came here.”

“That was different, I had no choice that was self defense. That’s not murder!” Then it occurs to her this isn’t her Sesshomaru. ’How did he know I killed Brandon? I never told anyone!’ With her gaze hardened she calls, “Murasaki no Raikō!”

The screams stop but the tears still pour down Avalon’s face. With a final cry of Murasaki no Raikō. Avalon comes back to reality sensing a powerful demonic aura to her right. In her disoriented state she reacts on instinct, rolling over onto her knees and swiping up with her blade. Sesshomaru jumps back but not in time. She strikes his pauldron and cuirass shattering them. 

Avalon opens her eyes and stares incredulously. "Sesshomaru?” She lowers her sword, out of breath. “Are you real?" 

Jaken is shocked that Avalon struck his Lord and on top of that destroyed his armor.

"What are you talking about?" Sesshomaru maintains his distance, touching his chest where she breached his armor.

"You...I....we....didn't...I mean..." Avalon stumbles over he words, shaking her head. "This is real right?"

"Put the sword down," he says, not wanting to take another hit from it.

"Why should I? So you can call me a worthless whore again and a murderer?” She starts to sob, shakily holding the blade in her hand

He only shakes his head. "Do as you please. Jaken," he calls to his servant. "Escort her back to the village."

"You bastard." She drops the blade. "You really are him."

"Who else would I be?" He snorts, tired of her antics. 

"HIM, the vision of you."

"Should I be surprised you were dreaming of this Sesshomaru?" He turns circling her. "Tell me, was I your lap dog. Did I give you what you wanted? You think I don't know how you feel about me? That you think I will become your tame lover, your fool."

"Tame lover, if you consider rape and breaking my body tame sure that was my vision of you. What a sweet, sweet dream," her voice drips with sarcasm

"Don't fool yourself Avalon. You expect something of this Sesshomaru I will not give you. Now get up. You're going back to the village. Along the way, you will tell me who it was that took you and why."

"I don't expect anything Sesshomaru. I may want things but I don't ever expect anything," she spat bitterly. 

"Who was he? Why did he want you?"

"Will you believe what I tell you? Or will you doubt me?"

He points at his nose looking at her like she is crazy.

"Then you will know that I won't lie, good. Then heed me, it would be disastrous to take me back to the village. Whatever he wants with me can't be good. He was the reason I didn't want to be in that village to begin with."

Sesshomaru stalks to her and lifts her by her shoulders, "You have already lied. You know who it was and you know what he wanted. And if you knew it, you hid it from this Sesshomaru. Is this more of your games? Your attempts to manipulate me?"

"Hardly, you were set on leaving me there no matter what I said."

"It is not the fault of this Sesshomaru, if you withhold information."

Avalon huffs, "As if it would have mattered. Let's leave this temple and I will tell you what I know of him"

"You will tell me now, I am not your dog to order as you see fit."

Avalon's eyes slid towards the monks. "There are things that should not be spoken of in the presence of others."

Sesshomaru’s eyes follow Avalon’s. He nods his head to the entrance of the temple for her to follow him. He releases her shoulders and she slumps to the floor. She tries to get up but her body is so weak. Avalon tries again gritting her teeth and growling. The monks rush to her side. "Leave me be." 

Sesshomaru seeing her struggling to stand and tiring of waiting, grabs Avalon by her right arm and hauls her out of the temple setting her down under a tree. "You will tell me who is the one that took you and why you thought it beneficial to keep it from this Sesshomaru. If you lie Avalon," he kneels holding a claw under her chin, "or attempt to 'control' what you reveal. I will kill you." 

"You don't need to threaten me Sesshomaru, have you thought maybe I'd be happy to reveal stuff without the death threat?"

"As if you have revealed anything of use, while you guard what you think you know and attempt to manipulate it at your own expense. Speak."

"Jaken should leave. You promised me."

Sesshomaru grows frustrated with her demands but he did promise her that. "Jaken leave us." Once Jaken is out of view and away Avalon says, "Let's see, he goes by many names and many faces. His original name was Onigumo. He goes by the name Naraku now and uses the guise of Lord Kagewaki. That is how he approached the village as Lord Kagewaki. He wants chaos as far as I can tell. He enjoys hurting everyone. He doesn't know this but the jewel will be returning to this world and then he will want the jewel above all else."

"Jewel?"

“Shikon no Tama. Once he learns it’s back, he will want it to increase his powers.”

"Another pathetic hanyou seeking power but it was destroyed when Inuyasha foolishly gave his heart to a mortal woman. How will it return?"

“It was burned with the miko's body but she is reborn. The jewel is in the reincarnation. She will release your half-brother and return the jewel to this world.”

He becomes pensive. He never saw a need for the jewel, strength is achieved by patience and practice not by magic, but Inuyasha would have wanted it to become like him. "Why would Naraku want you?"

“I honestly don't know. It worries me greatly. I was so scared when I was his captive. He treated me kindly like he wanted to gain my trust.”

"Will he target this Sesshomaru?"

“He will want your body eventually for the power you have. He will want to fuse it to himself.”

"How will he take it?"

“When you confront him, you will slice him to pieces but those pieces will gather around you and reanimate to constrict around your body and lock you in place while he absorbs you.”

He shakes his head. "Foolishness. A body that is severed dies."

Avalon says in a serious tone. "Not his. He is a conglomeration of demons.”

"He will seek my power and if I destroy him, he will reform," he thinks to himself. "You're hiding something else. If you think you know my future so well, how do I defeat him?"

“You won't like the answer. Are you sure you want to know?”

"You think I am afraid?"

She shakes her head and smiles. "No, I don’t think you are afraid. You do not defeat him alone. You will have the help of Inuyasha and 3 ningen”

"Inuyasha?" he growls out the name. "But if what you say is true, even he will not have the strength to defeat this Naraku. How do I kill him Avalon?"

Avalon looks down. "Right now there is a chance to kill him with the help of a miko’s powers but he will get stronger and stronger. I honestly don't know if you can kill him alone Sesshomaru."

"You're lying. You came here thinking you can manipulate me, manipulate time itself and now you are scared because you understand it is not a game. How do I defeat him?"

“You would need to destroy his heart and I didn't come here by choice.”

"In order to do that I would need a weapon to destroy his body and something tells me, you know exactly where I will find it."

Avalon looks at him, scooting closer and puts her right hand over his heart. "Here."

"That's an organ not a weapon. Where do I find this weapon?"

“You must find it within.”

"Within what?"

“Yourself.”

"Myself? Weapons are forged by strength not feelings. What are you hiding?"

She shakes her head. "Sesshomaru, you are not ready yet."

The monks hearing the argument rush out to aid the new wielder of Murasaki no Raikō.

"Are you ready to die then?" He wraps his fingers around her throat. "An unknown evil will threaten my life and you claim loyalty to this Sesshomaru and refuse to speak plainly.” He tightens his grip until she wheezes. "You will tell me where this weapon is and how I will get it."

“Release the Miko or we will be forced to take action.” One of the monks raises his hand holding a sutra. 

Avalon grabs Sesshomaru’s hand. "I can't talk if you’re choking me. Let me go and I will tell you. There is no need for this."

"Tell them to leave," he loosens his grip, "or I will kill them."

Avalon screams, "Go now! I do not need your assistance!"

"Lady Miko please allow us to assist." 

"I said leave. Do so now. This is a private conversation."

The monks look at each other as if debating. 

"Go!" 

They nod and head back into the temple.

"You will tell me the truth?" He releases her throat.

“I have never lied to you.”

"No, you just thought you could control this Sesshomaru like a lap dog. Speak."

Avalon levels a glare. "More like surviving and trying to get the best outcome for you so you can get the weapon you need to defeat Naraku faster."

"I said speak, what is this weapon’s name? How will I get it?" he hisses out between clenched teeth, anger rising.

"The name is Bakusaiga. You will manifest the weapon of your own power. To do this, first you need to forget about Tetsusaiga. Next you need to have the desire to protect loved ones and you need compassion.”

"Lies."

“You would know if I lied.”

Rage courses through him. "Loved ones? What loved ones? You? Manipulations!" Sesshomaru grabs Avalons throat. 

"It’s not me, it’s a little girl.”

"What little girl?" his voice rises in desperation

“Rin.”

"Who is she?"

“A little village orphan.”

"Why would I care about an orphan? She would be even more useless to me than you have been!"

“She tends you when you are gravely injured.”

"By who? Naraku?" He slams her back first into the trunk of a tree. “Why should I believe this? Love, compassion? Weakness!" 

Hikari arrives on the back of the dragon after convincing him to go back to check on Avalon and Sesshomaru. Seeing Avalon slammed into the tree, she gets off the dragon ignoring the pain surging through her injured foot as she rushes to help Avalon.

Avalon summons her sword to create a barrier. She raises it to her side when Sesshomaru knocks it from her hand.

"I was not ready the first time." He gloats over her inability to properly use her sword. "I will never care about something so vile as a ningen! I will kill him myself when I find Tetsusaiga. And you...I am through with you. It was a mistake to believe you could ever offer more than a body for pleasure."

"You don’t even know where to look and you have yet to have the pleasure of my body. All you have done is abuse me such a strong yokai”

His hands clamp down on her neck as her face begins to change colors. "Who's choice is it to allow it? To chase me like a cat in heat? I will…”

“Stop Sesshomaru-sama please don't hurt Avalon-onēsan! You promised to protect her." Hikari jumps up to grab Sesshomaru’s arm just as a monk lets loose an arrow striking Hikari in the back. The arrow goes through her body protruding from the breastplate. Hikari falls lifeless to the ground. 

Avalon cries in desperation, "HIKARI!" 

Sesshomaru releases his grasp as Avalon dives to cradle Hikari's fallen body. She presses her fingers to her throat and feels no pulse. "Sesshomaru!" The sadness was palpable. “She’s gone. Sesshomaru, please bring her back, only you can do it.” Avalon cradles the girl crying into her hair.

He's seen death many times, but there is something different about this little girl who had already suffered so much. Silently Tenseiga pulses by his side as if it were calling to him. He remembers Hikari’s words, what she said about the men who hurt her, her mother who sacrificed herself for her.

"Set her down."

Avalon sets the girl down and steps back.

He leans over and breaks the arrow head from the shaft with one hand while releasing his whip and killing the monk who fired the shot with the other. It wraps around the monk's neck breaking it. Sesshomaru can't breathe, this child, Hikari...light. He tugs the arrow out from her breast and whispers quietly in her ear, too quietly for anyone else to hear, "You did not deserve this." 

He draws his sword, and then he sees them, green frog-like minions from the underworld. 'I can see them'. He raises his katana and strikes them down, then kneels next to the child, waiting. 

Avalon kneels down bring the girl up to her chest. She looks up into Sesshomaru's face with hope and joy, she knows that Hikari will live again, "Sesshomaru-sama I can never express my gratitude for this." She thinks for a moment, then gives him what he wanted. “A pearl in Inuyasha’s right eye. That’s the gateway.”

He remains silent, storing the information away but focusing intently on Hikari, waiting until Hikari's heart begins to beat. The sound both shocks and gladdens him. He touches the girl's shoulder only for her to recoil when her eyes open. 

"No!" She throws her arms around Avalon. "He tried to kill you! He's just like them!"

"Hikari." Avalon cradles her as she nuzzles into her chest. "He saved you." Avalon looks over at Sesshomaru helpless to tell him what she feels.

"No! He's just like them! I hate him!"

Those words stab at his chest, he can't breathe. He needs to escape. If he had not been strangling Avalon, Hikari wouldn't have gotten in the way. "You're no better than the Samurais who raped me." The child fumes at him and he runs, like a coward because he can't face the sorrow of a child.

"Sesshomaru you need to know Tenseiga can only bring someone back once." Avalon calls as loud as she can hoping he hears as he flees.

He heard her. 'Only once?' He needs answers. 

Below Hikari cries against Avalon. "I told you he was evil! Why did you let him hurt you!" She sobs holding her ankle. "Why? Please don't let him," she can't control her breathing. It's obvious she's going into a full blown panic attack.

"Hikari I need you to focus on me. I need you to breath with me."

She shakes her head refusing. "No!" She covers her ears.

"Hikari." Avalon says in a more commanding tone, "Focus. You remember the exercises I taught you? the breathing ones."

"Yeah," she whimpers rubbing her eyes. "Please, make it stop!"

"What do you want me to stop?"

It was one after another and another. Six times and then again until her mother helped her escape. "They have Ka-chan!" she screams. "They won't let her go! Let her go!"

"Hikari you are safe. No one will harm you."

"Is he gone?" she breathes more calmly but still cries.

"Hai, he is gone." Avalon pets her hair trying to soothe the poor young girl.

She hiccups finally calming down. "Don't let him hurt you again," she says firmly. "Please? Don't let him hurt you?"

"Hikari, I don't intend to let him hurt me ever again."

She wipes her nose and sits up. "He gave me the puppy. He said not to tell you. Why is he so sweet and then so mean?"

Avalon smiles down at Hikari, "Because he acts on his desires without considering all the consequences. He is very, very, complicated."

"You're going to go back to him, aren't you?"

“I’m not going to seek him out, that’s for sure.” Avalon stares in the direction he ran.

The three monks go over to Avalon and Hikari . “Lady Miko are you okay?”

Avalon looks at the monks incredulously. She knew it was not their intent to harm the girl but because of them Hikari had died. “I am fine. I told you to leave me be, why did you not listen?”

“We would happily give our lives to protect the Murasaki no Raikō Miko.”

“Why do you keep calling me a Miko?”

“Only one with spiritual power is fit to wield Murasaki no Raikō. Were you not trained?”

Avalon shakes her head. All three monks turn to look at each other and then look at Avalon in shock. “You should have never attempted this without formal training but the fact you have survived shows how much the sword is truly yours.”

Avalon looks at the monk who spoke and shrieks, “SURVIVED, like I could have died?” 

Hikari looks up at Avalon in alarm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and Kudo!


	12. Resolutions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon learns more about her sword. Something exciting happens to Hikari after she is resurrected and Avalon resolves to say goodbye to Hikari.

Three monks gather around Avalon and Hikari a few feet from the temple, where Avalon pulled her sword.

“Lady Miko we did not mean to frighten you.” 

Avalon looks down at her charge and presses her lips together and sees the girl’s terrified expression not wanting to disturb her further she says, “I am not frightened, I was only caught off guard.”

HIkari looks up at Avalon saying, “Avalon, can we go back to the village now?”

“Soon Hikari but not yet. I need to speak with these monks first.”

Avalon continues to cradle Hikari. She doesn’t want her to see the dead monk. She tries to figure out what to do since she is so tired and now has Hikari to care for as well. Would Hikari be okay riding on Ah-Un or would she feel uncomfortable with it now?

“Monk, I need my horse can you bring him to me?”

“Hai, Lady Miko.” One of the monks goes to the horse, unties him from the tree and leads him to Avalon. As the monk brings the horse over, she motions for him to approach her. 

“Down here.” Avalon motions with her hand for him to lean down. He leans over to be down at Avalon’s level. She whispers in his ear, “Remove the dead monk. I do not want my charge to see his body.” She feels bad that he died. She didn’t want anyone to die but she can see the change happening in Sesshomaru. The young man nods his head and goes to the other monks as the horse blocks the view of Hikari and Avalon.

“Tell me Hikari, I heard you say something about Sesshomaru promising to protect me, can you tell me about that?”

Hikari raises her right arm, eyes wide watching it move. “Avalon, I can move my arm again.” She stares down at the foot that was in a brace before flexing it lightly. “My leg doesn’t hurt anymore...what happened?” 

Avalon stares at Hikari’s right arm. “Let me see your arm.” She reaches for it. 

Hikari flexes her arm back and forth and rolls her shoulder. “I haven’t been able to move this arm since…” she stops short, not wanting to talk about what happened.

“I think it might have to do with  Tenseiga .” Avalon grabs Hikari’s left foot and pulls the brace off, She bends the ankle and sees there is no swelling and the bruising is gone. “Does this hurt at all?” 

“No,” Hikari grabs her ankle and wiggles her foot, flexing her toes and taps it on the ground. She pushes herself tentatively setting her bad foot down and then resting her whole weight on it. She jumps up and down, “Look Avalon! I can jump!” then darts off and runs circles around the trees and leaps over a log. “I can run again! Look! Look!” 

“I am so happy for you Hikari! Come on back here.” Avalon opens her arms waiting for Hikari.

For a moment she doesn’t want to come, but to play but then shrugs her shoulders and slumps into Avalon’s embrace. “What are we going to do now?”

Avalon wraps her arms around Hikari and nearly crushes her as she rocks her back and forth. One of the monks comes over and nods at Avalon letting her know the body is out of sight. Avalon nods back. “Hikari can you help me up?” 

The girl starts laughing because now she is the one that can be of some use. She leans down and wraps an arm around Avalon’s waist and supports her weight. “What happened?” 

“Hmmm, that’s a complicated question. But basically I went through a trial to get my sword. It was exhausting. I’m okay. I’m just really tired and need to rest but I will be fine.” Avalon summons her sword into her hand demonstrating to Hikari her new ability. 

“It didn’t help you with him,” Hikari says bluntly as they walk to the temple. “I guess he’s really mad.” 

“He’s mad. So what? It isn't right that he abuses me. I tried to use the sword to summon a barrier but he moved quickly to disarm me. I will get better at wielding my sword. I know someone who can help me. I just hope she will. But you never answered me, what was that about Sesshomaru promising to protect me? Monk, one of you grab my horse and tend him” 

“I was scared and asked him if he would protect you and he said he would...well he nodded anyway.” 

Avalon nods her head considering what it would mean. “Interesting, I’m not sure how to interpret that. It was definitely agreeing to it. Thank you Hikari.” 

“I don’t think he saw it that way. You’re getting heavy, where are we going?” Hikari stumbles and drops Avalon sitting next to her. “And why is he still here?” She points at Jaken. 

Avalon sits and looks over at Jaken and laughs. She motions Hikari to get down to her. Once she is by her she whispers in her ear, “Sesshomaru left him behind. He has no idea what happened. He probably thinks he still has to protect me. I’m not about to dissuade him.” Speaking louder Avalon says, “I think I would like to rest at the temple for the night and leave in the morning, if that would be okay with you Hikari?” 

“Where are we going?” Hikari asks moving her arm around again. “I bet I could punch something with this arm now.” She throws her fist out and knocks Avalon in the nose. “Sorry!! I wasn’t aiming!” 

Avalon holds her nose, “Hiarki! That hurt.” She pushes against Hikari hard enough to make her sway where she sits but not hard enough to knock her over. “I’m not entirely sure. I know we have to go back to Kaede’s. Jaken Jr. needs you and so do the kids. As for me I can’t be there anymore. Not with Lord Kagewaki having his eye on me. It would be too dangerous for everyone there.” 

Hikari lowers her head, curling her knees into her chin and turns away from Avalon and starts crying. 

Avalon leans over and wraps her arms around Hikari. “It won't be forever. I will visit, I just can't stay there.” 

“Everyone always leaves!” Hikari screams at Avalon as she runs out of the temple into the forest, leaving Avalon and Jaken alone. 

“HIKARI!” Avalon screams and starts to crawl, following her. She is worried Hikari might be harmed and doesn’t want any of the monks to confront her. She finally makes it out the door, “HIKARI, please come back. Jaken I need you to go find Hikari. She could get hurt.” 

“I’m not your servant. I don’t have to listen to you.”

Avalon’s eye twitches and she hits Jaken in the head. “Do you honestly think Sesshomaru-sama would want anything happening to her?”

Jaken rubs the new bump on his head, “Ie.”

“Well go find her then. I’d do it myself if I could.”

“Fine.” Jaken starts searching around “Hikari where are you? Hikari.” Jaken wanders around until he finally sees Hikari sitting under a tree with her arms wrapped around her knees. “Hikari you need to get back to Avalon.” 

“It’s not fair Jaken-sama,” she sobs into her knees. “Everyone always leaves.” 

Jaken puts his hands in his sleeves “Well it's not. Sesshomaru-sama always leaves me behind too.” 

She chuckles wiping her nose. “So you know how it feels. Did he say he would protect Avalon?” 

“No but he left me to protect her and threatened my life if I failed.” 

“He’s a liar,” she says quietly. 

“SESSHOMARU-SAMA would never lie!” 

“I’m not going back,” she says firmly. “You can’t make me.” 

“What do you mean you’re not going back? To Avalon?” 

“What does she care, she’s leaving me anyway. I can walk now. I don’t need her.” She turns to face away from him. 

“If Avalon didn’t care, I wouldn’t have a lump on my head.” Jaken points to the bump on his head. “Hikari, I don’t think Avalon wants to leave you behind. At least she explains things to you. Sesshomaru-sama just orders me to do something and then walks away. Besides, it’s dangerous out here, a demon would be more than happy to eat you up. Me, I’ll be fine, but you are just a ningen.” 

She growls angrily then gets up and follows Jaken back to the temple. “If he comes back I’ll kill him.” 

“You would threaten Sesshomaru-sama?” Jaken exclaims in disbelief. 

“Yes stupid toad. He’s not that tough,” she says arrogantly. “I could do it.” 

Jaken starts laughing hysterically. Just then Avalon sees Hikari and Jaken coming towards the temple. “Hikari, I’m so glad you’re okay! Why is Jaken acting crazy?” 

Hikari says nothing to Avalon. She shoulders past her and finds a spot to curl up against the wall by herself and stares quietly at the ceiling. 

Avalon watches Hikari move to her spot and sighs. Avalon allows her some time to cool off while she talks to Jaken. “Jaken what is going on?”

“Hi..Hik..Hi... Hikari says she can kill Sesshomaru-sama!” Jaken continues to laugh.

Avalon looks over at Hikari inquisitively wondering why she would threaten his life. She smacks Jaken. “Stop laughing at her.” Jaken stifles his laughter. Avalon crawls over to Hikari “Hikari please talk to me.” 

Hikari still refuses to acknowledge Avalon or even make eye contact with her. “Well when you want to talk, I’ll listen. I just want you to know I’m glad you are safe.” Avalon crawls away from Hikari and goes to rest at the temple entrance, she still wants to talk to the monks. 

After a few hours, the monks come back and Avalon examines them up and down. They are sweating and there is dirt on their hands. “He’s buried?”

Monk one answers, “Hai.”

“I am sorry for your loss.”

“It is nothing to die in the service to the Murasaki no Raikō Miko.”

“Tell me your names.”

The first monk speaks, “I am Eiji.” Pointing to another monk, Eiji speaks, “This is Giichi.” Pointing to the last of the three Eiji says, “This is Kazue.”

Avalon nods then asks, “You keep calling me the Murasaki no Raikō Miko. What does it actually mean?”

Kazue speaks, “You are the true owner of Murasaki no Raikō and only a priest or priestess can wield it. Many have tried before you, but no one has been able to draw it out in 100 years.”

Avalon takes a deep breath stifling her shock. ‘I’m a miko, that can’t be right can it?’ “Are you sure I’m a Miko?”

Eiji shakes his head. “There is no other explanation. Only one with spiritial power can free the sword from the slab.” 

Avalon nods slightly dumbfounded. “Is it always such a long time between wielders?”

Eiji says, “Ie, sometimes shorter sometimes longer.” 

“How was the sword created?”

Giichi speaks, “We only know the legend. The Kamis created the blade to be used by a wise Miko. Upon her death she put her memories into the blade and willed that this temple be built and any should have the chance to try their hand at drawing the blade. It is said, it is the Miko's will that picks the wielder, but none can tell why they are chosen. Sometimes they are dark and sometimes they are light. The elders know more but they are not here.”

“So these elders, where are they?”

Eiji replies “They are scattered and are hidden. They pass the full extent of the legend down to a single acolyte. I can summon one for you.”

Avalon considers she would really like to know more but she doesn't want to linger and she doesn't want to put anyone in danger. “Can one tell a friend of mine the legend?”

Giichi asks “Miko?”

“There is a Miko I trust her name is Kaede. Are you familiar with her?”

Giichi shakes his head. “No I am afraid not.”

“She is elderly with a patch on her one eye. Perhaps you might be familiar with her elder sister Kikyo?”

Kazue exclaims, “I do recall that name. She came to claim the sword but failed many years ago.”

‘Interesting, so Kikyo was not meant to draw this blade.’ “Are you familiar with the village she hails from?”

Eiji answers, “Hai”

“That is the village I need the information sent to, can that be done?”

Eiji agrees, “Hai, it will be done.”

“I know what happened when I pulled the blade but if I wasn’t the right person, what would have happened?”

Giichi says, “If you were not the correct wielder the sword would have stayed in the block and you would have fainted and your sins would have confronted you.”

“But my sins did confront me.”

Kazue says, “Hai but you also learned how to use the blade and it came out of the block. This is what happens to the chosen one.”

“Interesting, I know I can summon the blade is there a limit? Can I hand the blade to someone else to use? If someone takes it from me can they use it against me?”

Eiji speaks “As long as you live, the blade can be summoned by you. You can hand the blade to someone and they can use it but they could never use it against you. It would pass through your body without harming you.”

“What happens if a demon handles the sword?”

Kazue nods and says, “That would depend on if you gave the blade to them or not. If you handed them the blade they could use it, however if they tried to separate you from your blade, it would purify them.”

“That is very useful information. Is it okay if I stay here for the night?”

Eiji exclaims, “You and your friends may stay as long as you like. We are your servants, your acolytes. We will do whatever you wish of us, for as long as you live.”

“Then who replaces you in this temple if I die and you're all dead?”

Kazue says, “You need not worry, we are only the guards for this week. There are many more of us. We will all follow you.”

“But you would not listen when I told you to leave me be.”

Eiji explains, “We had not pledged ourselves to you yet. A pigeon with a message has been sent to tell of you. Our brothers will all arrive tomorrow to pledge themselves to you.”

‘Great, I hope Naraku doesn’t mean to harm them.’ “Send a new message telling them not to come.”

Kazue asks, “What? How can they pledge themselves to you?” 

“What happens when I die?”

Eiji says, “The sword will return to the slab.”

“So all your group would realize that I was the true wielder of Murasaki no Raikō?”

Eiji nods his head.

“Then they can pledge their loyalty when they see me. Quickly, send a message to stop them from coming.”

Eiji nods and runs into the temple. “Kaz you mind if I call you that?”

Kazue says, “Ie, you may call me anything you like my Lady.”

“What about you Gi? You mind if I call you that?

Giichi states, “Ie, feel free to call me anything you like.”

“Kaz, Gi, I’m really tired. Would you mind setting something up for me and my friends to rest on. I’m sure they are hungry also. I know I am.”

Kazue and Giichi respond together, “Of course, Miko-sama”

“Ava will be fine.”

They both nod moving into the temple. 

Avalon puts her head in her hands shaking it. ‘Why me?’

Some time later Avalon can smell food cooking. She can feel some energy returning to her so she tries to stand up. On shaky legs she walks into the temple finding Hikari still in her spot. She walks over and sits next to Hikari. Avalon looks up at the ceiling. Soon the monks come out with three dishes and set them in front of Hikari, Avalon and Jaken. Avalon looks as the monks walk away. Avalon and Jaken eat in silence. After she finishes eating she looks over at Hikari. “I’m sorry.” Avalon gets up and crawls into the futon the monks had prepared for her and falls asleep instantly.

Avalon awakes and finds Hikari asleep on the futon next to her and can’t help but smile seeing her alive and well. Avalon stretches her limbs, happy to feel them respond without protest. She feels refreshed, sleep was the answer. She gets up and walks quietly looking for the monks. She soon spots Jaken asleep in a corner. Shaking her head she continues to look for the monks. She sees a sliding shoji door. She knocks on the frame and hears shuffling in the other room. “Eiji, Kaz,Gi you in there?”

“Hai, Ava-sama.”

Avalon cringes at the -sama being added. “I was wondering do you have any miko garb?”

Kazue slides the door open saying, “Hai, I would be happy to get it for you.”

“Arigato.” Avalon nods, “Can you prepare food for me and my friends.”

Eiji and Giichi follow Kazue out of the room Giichi says, “We would be happy to.”

“Also, do you have any food good for travel?”

Eiji says, “Hai, we will have it wrapped and ready for you. Will you be leaving today?”

“Hai, I cannot linger. I am sorry.”

Eiji frowns, “You need not apologize Ava-sama.”

Avalon looks over Eiji “Have my horse tended to I will be riding out soon after eating.” 

Eiji nods his head “Hai, it will be done.”

“Arigato.”

Avalon walks back towards where she left Hikari. Avalon goes to Hikari and leans over to give her a hug and shakes her shoulder saying softly, “Hikari, time to get up.” 

Hikari groans and rubs her eyes, seeing Avalon standing near her, she narrows and turns away. “Go away.” 

“Hikari, I know you’re upset with me but I want to spend as much time as I can with you.” 

“No you don’t, you want to leave,” she got up and trotted away from Avalon. ‘I bet I can run faster than her now.’ 

Avalon follows behind Hikari, “I don’t want to leave, I have to leave to protect you.” 

Hikari turns around screaming and attempts to land a blow against Avalon’s nose in frustration. 

Avalon catches Hikari’s fist and turns her around pulling her back into Avalon’s chest, using her weight to bring both of them to the ground. “Sweetie do you really think I want to leave you? You’re like a sister to me. I haven’t felt this attached to anyone since my parents were killed.”

Hikari kicks her feet trying to get away, screaming, “You’re lying! You’re a liar! No wonder you want to be with him, you’re perfect for each other!” She rolled over trying to get away. “Let me go!!” 

Avalon struggles against Hikari. She rolls with her and keeps the momentum going till she is back on top of Hikari. “If that were true, why am I still here and holding you? If I didn’t care I wouldn’t bother with you. I would just let you run off. But I care about you a lot.” Tears start flowing in Avalon’s eyes as she tries to reason with Hikari. 

“I don’t want to be alone again,” Hikari starts crying too, finally ceasing her efforts to escape. 

“I don’t want to leave you alone Hikari, I want you to be with me.” Avalon sobs into the back of Hikari’s head 

“Why does everyone have to leave? Everyone always leaves me,” she rolls over and hugs Avalon. “Can’t you stay?” 

“Kami I wish I could, I wish I could keep you safe by my side. I don’t want to be without you. But the man who took me, he’s not human. He's a yokai and he is evil incarnate and until I know why he is interested in me I’m not safe to be around. He will use whatever he can to hurt whoever he can. I am so sorry Hikari, I never wanted to do this to you. I wish that yokai never saw my face,” Avalon continues to sob as she explains herself 

Hikari nods holding Avalon around the shoulders still crying but nods her head. “Okay. Promise me you’ll visit?” 

“I wouldn’t have it any other way Hikari. Whenever I can I will come see you I promise.” 

“Okay,” Hikari agrees as they both get up to go back to the temple. 

Once Avalon and Hikari get back to the temple they are greeted by the monks holding food laiden trays. They set one down in front of Jaken. Avalon and Hikari sit as the monks set the trays down in front of them. After eating sometime in silence, Avalon decides to broach a touchy subject. “Hikari, will you be okay riding the dragon back or do you want to ride behind me on my horse?” 

Hikari thinks to herself for a few minutes then says, “at least he isn’t a jerk? If I ever see Sesshomaru again I’m going to break his nose,” she boasts throwing an arm out, pretending she is punching his face. 

Avalon stares in horror at Hikari’s declaration, “Hikari, please tell me you would never actually try to harm Sesshomaru.” 

She folds her arms with a smirk and says, “I will. You’ll see.” 

Avalon nearly stumbles over her tray to get in front of Hikari, “Hikari I’m not looking to protect Sesshomaru. I’m looking to protect you. I have no idea how he would react if you were to attack him.” 

“You worry too much. He gave me Jaken Jr. He wouldn’t hurt me...I think, but I’m still going to kill him for being a jerk.” 

Avalon places her head in her hands, ”Please promise me you won’t.”

Jaken chimes in, “That’s what she said before. She is a stupid little girl. Sesshomaru-sama will kill her for sure.”

Avalon turns on Jaken in a rage, “Shut up!” She turns back to Hikari. “Please, please, don’t try to attack him. He’s a jerk, I agree and he needs his ass kicked but not by you.”

Jaken says snobbily, “Like anyone would be any match for Sesshomaru-sama.” 

“I’ll do as I please,” she harrumphs and turns away from Avalon throwing a stick on the ground standing up and walking for the door. 

Avalon gets up and follows Hikari, “Hikari I want to keep you safe, don’t you see that?” 

“You can’t get everything you want Avalon,” she says very seriously. “Sometimes we have to make our own choices. He’s a jerk and I will kill him if I ever see him again.” 

Avalon says in a defeated tone, “Then I hope he is in a good mood when you see him, if you ever see him again.” She motions with her hand back to the temple, “Come on, let’s finish eating then we can head back to the village.” 

“Okay,” Hikari jumps up and down, still in awe of her working arm and leg. “I’m going to be tough, you’ll see.” She pretends to punch the air, then tries jumping and kicking only to land on her butt on top of Jaken. “Ow.” She rubs her backside.

“Get off me!!” he screams. 

Avalon laughs at the sight and reaches her hand out to Hikari. “We need to work on that, don’t we?” 

Hikari takes Avalon’s hand and nods her head, “Yeah.”

They make their way back to the temple to finish eating and once they are done, Avalon looks over at Hikari and says, “I’m going to change. Are you going to be okay for a few?” 

Hikari looks up from her food at Avalon, “Yup.”

Avalon slips away to the other room to change into the miko garb. She holds the kimono up and looks at the worn edges and the tears, thinking back to all she has been through so far. ‘I hope things are better from here on out.’ She carefully wraps the kimono, juban, and obi up into a bundle. She steps out into the other room dressed in her white and red attire, “So what do you think?” as she pirouettes in front of Hikari and Jaken. 

Jaken chimes in, “Whatever, it’s clothes.” 

“You look like Kaede-sama without the eye-patch,” Hikari laughs. 

Avalon nods her head, “Do I now, do I look wise like she is?” 

“No,” Jaken snorts and Hikari slaps him in the back of the head. 

“You look good to me!” Hikari says jumping on one foot, the foot that used to be injured. “Can we race? Let’s see who runs the fastest.” 

“I would be happy to race you but let’s wait until we are outside.” Avalon smiles at Hikari and gathers her things. Hikari bounces around the room excited to race Avalon. The monks come in. 

Eiji says, “Your horse has been prepared. There is enough food for the next week for your whole party. Is there anything else we can do for you Ava-sama?”

Avalon looks at the monks. “That will be good arigato.” She walks with her bundle and steps outside with Hikari on her tail. 

“Come on, let’s race to that big tree and back, whoever loses has to kiss Jaken,” Hikari giggles. “I bet I’m faster than you! Jaken-sama, you be the judge okay?” 

“Eww, I am so not kissing Jaken.” Avalon puts down her bundle of stuff. “Alright on the count of San .  Ichi...Ni... San.” With that Avalon launches herself towards the tree pumping her legs. 

Hikari runs after her keeping pace. Her legs move quickly, outpacing Avalon to the tree. 

Avalon giggles as she sees Hikari move ahead of her. “Oh no you don’t.” Hikari reaches the tree and spins around seconds before Avalon gets there. Avalon hits the tree and then really launches herself running with her training and passes Hikari to wind up back at the step of the temple as Hikari comes in just behind her. Breathing heavily, she looks at Hikari slyly. “So are you going to kiss Jaken?” 

Hikari smiles fiendishly and calls, “Jaken-sama!” She puckers her lips while he runs from her. “Come back Jaken-sama!” 

“Stay away you crazy girl.” Jaken keeps running until he trips over his own feet and landing on his face dazed. 

“Come back Jaken-sama!!!” She chases him. When she sees Jaken trip she smiles as she pounces on him rolling him over, she grabs both sides of his face and puckers her lips ready to kiss him.

Jaken comes out of his daze just as Hikari moves her face closer to his. “AHHHHHHH!” He waves his arms wildly.

Hikari plants a kiss right on top of his beak then lets him go.

“YOU! You!” Jaken rubs his beak wiping it furiously. “Stay away from me!” 

Hikari and Avalon laugh with such mirth Jaken finds himself wanting to laugh too but he keeps his face in a scowl.

Avalon finally calms down and picks up her pack. She sees her horse tied to a tree near the temple walking over to it and packing her bundle on him. “I think it’s about time we head out.” 

“Okay,” Hikari says walking over to the dragon. “At least you’re not like him are you?” she whispers as she pets their heads.”Not at all huh?” 

“So Jaken, are you riding with me or Hikari?”

“I guess I will ride with you, you're less crazy than that wild animal.” He points at Hikari. Avalon mounts the horse and reaches her hand down for Jaken to take. Jaken grabs hold and Avalon places him in front of her. “Jaken I need you to put your staff down so I can see”

“Oh” Jaken moves his staff out of the way. 

Avalon places her hands on either side of him grabbing the reins. She looks over and sees Hikari is already on the dragon.

The three monks look on as Eiji says, “Farewell Ava-sama. May your path be clear.

Kazue says, “I will miss you dear Ava-sama and you too Hikari-chan stay safe.”

Giichi says, “Please do not hesitate to call upon us again, we are forever your servants Ava-sama the Murasaki no Raikō Miko.”

Avalon nods her head at the monks “Let’s move out.” With that she flicks the reins and heads off towards Keade’s village.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo ya'll, we love it. Me (Elohiniar) is under epic amounts of stress, let us know how you are doing. It helps us get through this challenging time.


	13. Parting is Such Sweet Sorrow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon says goodbye to Hikari but Naraku isn't done with Avalon yet.

Avalon rides with Jaken in front of her on the horse, while the dragon flies by her side with Hikari on his back. Avalon and Hikari make small talk while Jaken pipes in here and there. 

When the sun starts getting low, Avalon brings her horse to a stop. The dragon lands and Hikari jumps down to stretch her legs. Avalon gets off her horse, getting Jaken down as well, setting him down on his feet. “Hey Jaken, you think you can find us wood for a fire tonight?”

“Yeah of course I can.”

“Arigato.” Avalon turns to Hikari who is stretching and stomping her feet on the ground. “How would you like to learn some more moves now that you can walk and jump Hikari?”

“You mean it, Avalon-Onēsan?” Hikari’s eyes light up.

“Of course. We can work on it till it's too dark to see.”

“Yeah!”

“Alright, I want you to stand like this.” Avalon squares her feet and shoulders to give herself a lower center of gravity and better balance. Hikari moves to mimic Avalon’s stance. “Good. Now I want you to make a fist like I showed you, but with your right hand now.”

“Okay Avalon.” Hikari makes a fist.

“Alright. Now pull back and punch with all your weight, not just your fist and move your body with the punch like this.” Avalon shows her how to punch using her whole body. 

Hikari tries mimicking it but loses her balance and ends up flailing her arms to keep from falling. “It’s no good,” Hikari says dejectedly.

“It’s okay Hikari, you’re not going to be perfect the first time you try something. So it just means you try again. Now watch me again closely.” Avalon demonstrates the move more slowly. “Now you try.”

Hikari nods her head and throws the punch but ends up losing her balance again.

“Try again.”

Hikari tries a few more times and finally gets it. “I did it.”

Avalon smiles. “I knew you could do it. Now do it again.”

Hikari punches again and Avalon nods her head. “Alright now we are going do some self-defence moves.”

“Okay.”

“I am going to pretend I’m a man and I’m trying to do bad things to you and I am going to talk you through what to do to stop me okay?”

“Uh…” Hikari hesitates. She isn’t sure she likes the sound of what Avalon is suggesting.

“Don’t worry Hikari, you are safe and this is the best way to teach you. Are you ready?”

“I guess.”

“Alright I am going to push you back against a tree.” Avalon grabs Hikari gently and pushes her back against a large tree. 

Jaken makes his way back to camp just at that moment with his bundle of wood. “Am I interrupting something?” 

Avalon looks over her shoulder and smiles. “Nope, just go ahead and start the fire. Alright Hikari, you feel trapped right?”

“Uh huh.” She feels some fear but knows she is safe with Avalon.

“I need you to realize you are in a very good position to injure the person attacking you right now.”

“I am?”

“Yup. Your first move is going to be bringing your knee into the person’s crotch. If I was really attacking you, you would hit me as hard as you can. So bring your knee up, hitting me between my legs but please don’t hurt me. This is just for demonstration.” 

Hikari hesitantly brings her knee up striking Avalon between her legs.

“Good, now this will likely cause your attacker to release you and cup their injured genitals. Like this.” Avalon grabs at her crotch, showing Hikari how her hands no longer hold Hikari. “Now if you can get away then do, but since I am still pressing my shoulder against you.” Avalon takes one hand holding Hikari, while using her other hand to cup her crotch. “It’s time for your next move.”

“My next move?”

Avalon looks up at Hikari with a smile “Yup.” Avalon puts her head down like she is still in pain from the hit. “You see how my head is down? I want you to grab both sides of my head.”

Hikari grabs both sides of Avalon’s head.

“Good. Now bring your knee up striking my nose. Gently,” Avalon cups her hand over her nose to protect herself and give some space for the eventual collision. It was still a little sore from when Hikari punched it yesterday. 

Hikari brings her knee up and strikes Avalon's nose gently. 

Avalon falls backwards, holding her nose, “This will stun your attacker. If they are still in your way you can either try to push them or kick them out of your way. Then you run.”

“Avalon are you okay?”

“I’m fine.” Avalon gets up smoothly and smiles at Hikari. “Pretty cool, huh?”

“Yeah.”

“Just remember, when you are actually facing off with them, you don’t hold back. You strike without mercy and you strike quickly. You don’t want them to get ahold of you again. They will try to stop you from hitting them that way.”

“I understand.”

“Alright let’s get some more training done before the sun sets.”

“Right!”

Avalon demonstrates a shuto strike, showing her how to make her hand rigid and chop at the throat, nose and groin. She reverses the movement to show her how to chop using the inside of her hand, so if the opponent blocks, you can continue to strike because your elbow will bend around the block. She shows Hikari how to use a palm heel strike, rotating her hand as she strikes. She goes over a high kick, a round house and a leg sweep. She shows HIkari how to use her elbow to strike, if her opponent is behind her and how to use her attackers' momentum against them. Eventually, the sun setting and darkness stops the training. The fire provides some light but not enough to train by.

“I guess it’s time to eat huh?”

Hikari’s stomach growls. “Yeah.”

Avalon grabs dried meat from the pack the monks gave her, passing out food for Hikari and Jaken. Each eats the portion. The fire crackles giving a gentle flicker of light on all of them and the night sky opens up before them. The stars are shining down, not a cloud in the sky. Avalon and Hikari make more small talk but soon Hikari starts nodding off. “Hey Hikari, I think it’s time to sleep.”

“I don’t want to, Avalon.”

“Well, let’s set up the bedding and if we fall asleep, we fall asleep.”

“Alright.”

Avalon gets up and grabs the bundle off the horse and lays it out in front of the fire as the dragon rests behind them. Hikari snuggles into the fabric, while Avalon watches over them. Jaken leans against the dragon and falls asleep. Hikari soon follows Jaken into oblivion. Avalon gets up and walks over to her horse. “Hey buddy, I guess you’re my horse now, huh?” She pets the horse as it nuzzles into her side. “You like me huh? I guess I should give you a name hmmm.” Avalon looks at the horse. “How about, Aibō ( **相棒** Partner)?” 

The horse snorts and shakes his head. 

“You don’t like that one, huh? Okay, how about Tayoru ( **頼る** rely)?” 

The horse shakes his head again. 

“Okay, okay, hmmm how about, Ten'un ( **天運** Will of Heaven)?” 

The horse looks in Avalon’s eyes and nods its head.

“Okay, Ten’un it is. I hope I can be a good caretaker for you.” 

The horse butts his head into Avalon’s shoulder. 

“Hey, what does that mean? Are you sending me off? Do you want me to sleep or something?” Avalon shakes her head, petting the side of Ten’un’s head. “Alright, I’ll go to sleep but you better wake me if anything comes.” 

The horse nays at her. 

“Yeah, yeah, good night Ten’un.”

Avalon walks over to the dragon. “Hey you guys, I know you will keep an eye out for us right?” 

The dragon looks at Avalon with intelligence and nods their heads. 

“Arigato, good night.” Avalon cuddles next to Hikari in the fabric and soon falls asleep.

The lightning of the sky wakes Avalon. Blinking a few times, she sees Hikari and smiles at her. Hikari had snuggled into Avalon’s side last night. Avalon moves slowly to dislodge herself and avoid waking Hikari. Once she is free of Hikari and the cloth, she walks a little ways away from the group. 

Summoning her sword, she pulls her samurai blade from her side. Using the two swords she starts to perform the exercises her sensei had taught her, long ago. Losing herself in concentration, each move is precise, practiced and exemplified. She starts to sweat as she pushes herself to move faster. Every muscle is lent to give strength and power in striking. She becomes frustrated thinking, ‘Sesshomaru is right. I know this well but it is not like an actual battle. I need someone to train me.’ With that thought she pushes her katana into its sheath and allows Murasaki no Raikō to fade away, walking back to camp.   
“Hey Hikari, Jaken it’s time to get up.”

Hikari’s eye peek open and she moans, “Really?”

Jaken gets up looking around. “Oh, it’s just you.”

“Yeah it’s just me. Come on you two.” Avalon grabs some more dried meat out of the pack, handing a portion to each of her group. Hikari and Jaken take it and start eating. Avalon sits next to Hikari, eating the portion she grabbed for herself. 

After Hikari and Avalon finish the food Avalon grabs at the bedding but Hikari stubbornly sits on it. “Alright, get up Hikari. I have to pack this up.” Hikari grumbles but gets up. Avalon wraps the fabric up and then stands up and straps it to Ten’un. Jaken stomps out the remains of the fire. All this takes less than an hour. Avalon looks over at Hikari and sees the glumness in her face. “Hey we still have the ride to Keade’s.”

“I don’t care, I don’t want you to leave.”

“I know, I know.” Avalon wraps her arms around Hikari. Hikari grips Avalon tightly and squeezes with all her might., “If you keep that up, you will break my back.”

“Then you can’t leave.”

Avalon leans her head down and kisses Hikari’s head. “I have to.”

“I know.” Hikari says dejectedly and lets her arms drop.

“Come, it’s time to go.” Hikari nods her head and gets on the dragon as Avalon mounts Ten’un. She reaches her hand down for Jaken. Jaken grabs it. Avalon pulls him up to sit in front of her. They set out heading towards Keade’s village. 

The ride is silent. Avalon doesn’t know what will make Hikari feel better about her leaving. Hikari knows that if she says anything to Avalon, she might break down crying. 

They arrive in the village hours later. Avalon keeps riding until she is in front of Keade’s hut and the dragon touches down next to her. Avalon hops off of Ten’un holding Jaken and placing him on the ground.

“You there Kaede-sama?”

“Avalon?” comes Keade’s weathered voice

“Hai.”

Kaede comes out of the hut seeing Avalon standing with Jaken and Hikari. Kaede smiles

“Ye all are safe.”

“Hai, but I will not be lingering and do not worry about Sesshomaru’s wrath. He has allowed me free range.”

“Tis’ this true?”

Hikari nods her head and Jaken shrugs. He wasn’t there for the conversation.

“Ye do not intend to stay? Where do ye intend to go?”

“I plan to seek out Hitomiko. Can you point me in the right direction?”

“Ye know of Hitomiko?”

Avalon nods her head. “She is the most powerful Miko I know of. I have gained a new weapon and have learned I am a Miko myself. I seek her to train me.”

“A new weapon ye say?” Keade’s eye roams over Avalon’s body looking for it but only finds the Katana she came with.

“Hai.” Avalon brings her hand forward calling Murasaki no Raikō.

Kaede’s eye widens as she sees the weapon form in Avalon’s outstretched hand. “Murasaki no Raikō?”

“Ah you know of it?”

“Hai, all well versed Mikos do. Ye must have been through hell to obtain it.”

“I don’t know about hell but it was bad.” Avalon averts her eyes, she really could do without reliving those memories. “It doesn’t matter. it is mine now for as long as I live.”

“That it is. Hitomiko is to the Northeast along the coast. Do ye intend to leave today?”

“It isn’t a good idea for me to linger. I plan to leave now.”

“AVALON, ie please stay with me a little longer?” Hikari screams flinging herself against Avalon. Avalon moves to catch the girl and avoid the weapon injuring anyone. Avalon drops the sword and brings Hikari around to her front. “You knew I couldn’t stay Hikari.”

“But I thought you would at least stay for the day. Just stay the night please?” Hikari cries holding tightly to Avalon

Avalon closes her eyes thinking about it. ‘I can’t risk putting you in any further danger. The longer I linger, the more likely Naraku is to find me with you.’ Tears slip down Avalon’s face. She can’t risk Hikari’s life. Her one and only redo was used. She steadies herself. “I am sorry Hikari. I can not risk it. You mean too much to me.”

“But Avalon…”

“Hikari if I had another option I would, but I don’t.” Avalon extracts herself from Hikari’s grip.

“Fine, I don’t want you here anyway.” Hikari runs off into the village towards the hut she shares with the children.

Avalon looks over at the dragon walking over to her and she pets their heads. “Can you keep an eye on her?” The dragons huff and follow in the path of Hikari. Avalon wipes the tears from her face. “I really do have to go.”

“So it would seem. Here, I want to give ye something for ye trip.”

“Oh?”

Kaede ducks into the hut, coming back a few moments later with a bow and a quiver of arrows. “It will help ye hunt and can be used against youkai, if ye have unlocked your miko powers. It was what I was trying to get from ye while I trained ye. When ye threw the stone at Sesshomaru, it sparked with purple reiki.”

“IS THAT WHY MY FOOT BURNED?!”

“What are you talking about Jaken?” Avalon queried.

“Nevermind.” Jaken folds his arms in his sleeves looking away.

“Nevermind him child, ye unlocked ye power in rage but since ye acquired this blade ye should be able to use ye powers at will. Hitomiko shall be able to train ye well.”

“I hope you are right Kaede-sama.” Kaede holds the bow and quiver out to Avalon. Avalon takes the quiver slinging it on her back and then the bow as well. “Arigato.” 

Avalon gets on her horse Ten'un. “You coming Jaken?” Avalon reaches her hand down to the little imp. Jaken takes it. Avalon pulls him up, setting him in front of her. “Sayōnara Kaede-sama.” With a heavy heart she leaves behind Hikari. She urges Ten’un on without looking back. She knows she has to make it to Hitomiko before the first snow. 

The air is already cold and the leaves are falling from the trees. It’s only a matter of time. After an hour of hard riding, Avalon notices everything is silent but the rhythmic beating of the horses hooves. Avalon starts to feel something is off. The birds are silent and her hair is standing on end. She glances to the left and right, scanning the area for any threats. “Jaken do you sense anything?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Haven’t you noticed the birds are silent.”

“So they are scared of the horse’s hooves.”

Avalon shakes her head. ‘What an idiot.’ After a few more hours, the sun starts to set. Avalon slows the horse and makes her way to a protected part, of a wooded area. Trees would shelter them from wind and they were slightly hidden from the worn path they were on. “Jaken you think you can find some wood?”

“Hai.”

Avalon summons her sword still not liking how quiet it was. ‘This isn’t right.’ 

Jaken soon returns with logs and starts the fire. Avalon pulls some of the food out of her pack and hands Jaken a portion. “I don’t want you wandering off very far. Something isn’t right here.”

“You’re crazy, onna.”

“Just stay here alright?”

“Whatever, I wasn’t planning on going anywhere anyway.”

Avalon nods her head. Jaken soon finishes his food and falls asleep by the fire. Avalon keeps her eyes open. She is tired but wide awake. Something wasn’t right and she knew it and she wasn’t going to be caught sleeping. She had stopped for the horse to rest.

As the moon crosses the sky, Avalon hears rustling in the trees to her right. She stands with her sword drawn ready to attack. Out steps a man dressed in a baboon pelt.

“Naraku.” Dread wells within her.

“Ah Ava, I am so pleased you are unharmed. I was worried.”

“I’m sure. What do you want?” She keeps her cool even as she just wants to run.

“Lord Kagewaki sent me to look for you. We returned to the temple but you were already gone.”

Avalon hums considering her options.

“Please come with me so we can return to Lord Kagewaki. He is most concerned for you.”

‘So he still wants to play this game. I’m not a match for him and Jaken would be of no use.’ “Let me get my horse and we can depart.”

Naraku nods his head, “I see you have Murasaki no Raikō.”

“I do.” Avalon allows her sword to fade away. She packs her things and leaves Jaken by the fire following Naraku. ‘Please forgive me Jaken.’ Avalon grabs Ten’un and follows Naraku in silence. 

Sesshomaru wanders for a bit considering what has transpired. He now knew where the gateway was. He nearly killed a woman he vowed to protect and Hikari died because of his temper. He resurrected her with the sword he thought was useless, only to learn it can only save someone once. He needs answers. He scents the air looking for the being Avalon called Naraku but the scent has gone stall. He resolves to visit Bokusenō for answers.

Sesshomaru traverses a path he knows well. Heading into the forest and pushing deeper, a booming voice can be heard. ”Welcome, to what do I owe this pleasure Sesshomaru? Perhaps you are curious about your sword.”

“Bokusenō.” Sesshomaru stops in front of a large tree. Soon an old wrinkled face swirls into view. “I have come to ask about the power of resurrection.”

“Resurrection, Tenseiga’s ability.” Bokusenō nods. “What do you wish to know about it?”

“I have come by a piece of information I wish for you to confirm,” Sesshomaru’s voice pitches with slight desperation. “Can the sword only bring someone back once?”

“Ah, that is the truth. Once a soul is called back from the netherworld by Tenseiga it cannot be recalled again.”

“Is there a way to change that?”

Bokusenō closes his eyes as if considering what to say. “Life is not meant to be infinite Sesshomaru. Everything that lives, must die.”

“I see.” Sesshomaru closes his eyes. ‘Unfortunate.’ “Do you know anything about a sword called Bakusaiga?”

“Bakusaiga? I am unfamiliar with such a blade.” Bokusenō eyes narrow. “Why do you ask?”

“There is a ningen that has been telling me many things. Her name is Avalon. Do you know anything about her?” 

“Ah,” Bokusenō’s face relaxes. “You speak of the onna that was accompanying you for a little while. She is not of this world. What she tells you may be true or may be false, but I would not doubt she knows what she speaks of.”

“She has said, I must give up on my pursuit of Tetsusaiga.”

Bokusenō hums then says, “Tetsusaiga you say? The sword is not meant for you to wield Sesshomaru.”

“Ridiculous.” Sesshomaru huffs and turns stalking away. 

Sesshomaru lifts his nose to search for a few demons to take out his frustration. He catches a scent and follows it, finding two demons that are triple the size of Sesshomaru. One is blue and the other is green. They have humanoid bodies but their faces look like oxes. Their hands have 3 fingers with claws and their feet are hooves. Sesshomaru leaps up and brings his whip forward and slashes them not to kill but to harm. He doesn’t want to kill them yet. He revels in the anguished cries of his prey. He whips them bloody, raw and after striking them until not an inch of their bodies aren’t bloody, he finally ends their lives. 

After he is finished he sighs. “Tetsusaiga will be mine.”

Sesshomaru allows himself to calm down, as he does, the image of Hikari flashes before his eyes. He needs to talk to her. Sesshomaru leaps into the air creating his yoki cloud and flies to the outskirts of her village. Landing, he masks his aura and scents the air finding her. He leaps along the top of the huts and trees silently making his way to Hikari. He finds her on the other side of the village picking herbs.

Hikari turns hearing something landing behind her. Her eyes widen then turn hard seeing him. “Sesshomaru!” She quickly makes a fist and tries to punch him in the face. 

His cheeks tighten, if only to stop himself from smirking at the child, who barely reaches his shoulder in height trying to punch him. He catches her fist, pushing it aside and says, “too slow.” 

Hikari then uses her right leg to kick out trying to hit his groin, while spinning and using her left elbow to hit at his abdomen.

He can’t help it, this time he snorts while dodging the kick to his groin and then grabs her left elbow, spinning her out to land on her face in the dirt. “Is that the extent of your training little one?” Surely Avalon had taught the child better than this. He decides to entertain this fight. He tosses his armor off and throws Tenseiga by her face, then waits for Hikari to get up again. 

Hikari growls, “I’m just getting started.” Seeing the sword by her face, she rolls over grabbing it and then springs up using her back and legs, she spins to face him. ‘I wish Avalon could have taught me more.’ She sets her sight on him and steps forward squaring her stance then slashes the sword in a wide arc, arming for his stomach 

“Impulsive.” He jumps behind her, straightening her shoulders and kicking her feet into the proper position with his toes. “A stomach wound would not fell this Sesshomaru. Your grip is too wide.” He takes her hands, bringing them closer together to properly hold the blade. “Attack.” 

“You would give tips to an enemy? Foolish.” Hikari drops her right arm from the sword to elbow him hitting him. She grips the sword again and spins around to slash at his neck 

Sesshomaru catches the blade in his hand. “Was that elbow supposed to hurt?” He rips the katana out of her hand throwing it aside and holds one hand up and points at his sternum with the other. “If you wanted to cause this Sesshomaru pain, you would hit here,” he points at the hyaline where the ribs join together. “Just beneath where the skin becomes soft.” He takes a step forward, hands held up. “Hit.” 

“I’ll kill you for what you did to Avalon!” Hikari pulls her right hand back, making a fist, then swings, putting all her weight into hitting him where he showed her. 

He makes no show of pain. “Harder. Hit.” 

“Bastard!” Hikari tries again she twists her body and focuses all her anger into the punch and pushes her body to hit as hard as she can. She changes her target to his face. 

He allows the blow to fall against his chin but it does nothing more than make the child clutch her wrist in pain. “Again,” he encourages her pointing again to the point in his sternum. “If you were to hit a human male there with the right force, it would kill them. Hikari,” he calls her name gently. “Again.” 

“Why are you allowing me to hit you? You're not even trying to stop me.” Hikari shakes her right hand out, trying to relieve the sting. 

“You are angry. Use it. Again,” he says, cocking his eyebrows at her and pointing at the flesh beneath his sternum. 

Hikari screams, “AHHHHHH!” She cocks her fist and twists her body and hits with all her might at the point he showed her. 

He grunts at the impact of her fist not because it hurts but to allow her to vent her frustration at him. He knew he deserved it. But then he noticed that she was moving freely on her ankle and the arm that had been lame before no longer hung limp by her side. ‘Did Tenseiga do this?’ There were too many unanswered questions. “Better,” he says smugly. “Sit.” He lowers himself on the ground just as Jaken Jr. comes running into his lap, licking his chin. 

Hikari sees an opportunity, she walks over to Sesshomaru. “Jaken come here,” she cooes. The dog rushes over to her and when she gets in range she uses a roundhouse kick aiming for his face. 

He catches her ankle, tossing her on the ground. “I said sit.” Jaken Jr. sits to Sesshomaru’s chagrin. ‘I wasn’t speaking to you.’ 

“I’m not yours to command!” Hikari says bitterly.

He takes her by the wrist and forces her down. “Sit.” 

Hikari goes to head butt Sesshomaru as she struggles to free her wrist 

He lets her struggle in place intent on wearing her out. Eventually she’ll tire out and have no other option but to sit. 

“LET ME GO!” Hikari screams 

“When you stop struggling like a child.” 

“Let me go and I’ll stop struggling.” 

He remains quiet, with a bored expression waiting for her to stop struggling. 

Hikari continues to struggle but her wrist is starting to hurt. “Sesshomaru, you're hurting me.” 

“Then cease your efforts to escape.” 

Hikari stills herself but her breathing becomes labored and her mind begins to race. 

“I have no intention to cause you harm,” he can hear her racing heart. He releases her wrist. “You have no need to fear me.” 

Hikari cradles her wrist when he releases her and her head snaps up to look at him when he tells her that she doesn’t need to fear him. “I don’t fear you!” 

“Your heart tells a different story.” He points at one of his ears. “If you learn to fight properly, you won’t need to fear the men of this time either.” 

Hikari doesn’t want to hear about this. “I don’t care. All I know is I don’t trust you. You promised to keep Avalon safe and you tried to kill her.” 

That was also true but he wasn’t going to admit that to the child in front of him. There is no sword more powerful than Tetsusaiga. “She will be safe.” ‘Safe away from this Sesshomaru.’ “And so will you.” He removes a tanto knife from inside his sleeve handing it to her. “Learn to use that and I will bring you a sword.” He stands, walking away, picking up his armor and sword, then soars into the sky, leaving HIkari confused. 

“SESSHOMARU, HOW CAN YOU BE SURE SHE IS SAFE IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHERE SHE IS?” she screams at his flying form. 

He doesn’t respond. ‘Time will tell if she is telling the truth.’ He knew the sword was entombed in the underworld and that the entrance was hidden by the black pearl in Inuyasha’s eye. He couldn’t get to it until the seal was broken, which she said he would know by pink streaks across the sky. He would wait until then to test the veracity of Avalon’s words. Until then, with her new sword, she was safe on her own.

Avalon follows Naraku in silence on Ten’un considering if she can escape and what plans Naraku has for her. Can she use it to her advantage? Can she get Naraku on her side? What part of her humanity will he take from her? The deadening of hope weighs heavily on her. They travel for a few hours until they come upon a castle. Naraku calls , “Open the gate, I must speak to Lord Kagewaki.” 

The guards open the gate, recognizing Kagewaki’s adviser. One guard rushes to rouse Kagewaki. “Come along Ava, Lord Kagewaki will be most pleased to see you.”

Avalon nods her head. ‘I bet.’ Avalon thinks bitterly 

Naraku leads her into the courtyard as Kagewaki appears in his nightwear on the porch. Kagewaki’s eyes widen and he smiles, “Ava, I am so glad to see you!” He rushes from the porch to greet Avalon. 

“Kagewaki.” Avalon says in an even tone as her lips press together.

Kagewaki grabs Avalon around the waist to lift her for the horse.

“Please, please come. I must show you around. Naraku Arigato for finding her.”

Naraku nods his head. “It was your wish. I am only too happy to help.”

Avalon allows Kagewaki to lead her into the castle as her heart drops. ‘I’m doomed’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Plesae comment and kudo!!! We love it!


	14. Lord Kagewaki’s Castle

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Naraku's plan is revealed for Avalon but can she get away.

Kagewaki holds Avalon’s hand pulling her into the castle. She walks with her head held high. Kagewaki leads her to a large room. He slides the shoji door open. “This will be your room.” Walking in, he continues to hold her hand. “My room is this one.” Kagewaki points to a door to an adjoining room. 

Avalon’s eyes widened. “Lord Kagewaki...”

“Just Kagewaki, dear Ava.”

“Kagewaki, I think that is highly inappropriate.” Avalon’s heart pounds, why would he place her next to his room.

“Nonsense, I only wish to keep you near and safe. The most secure room is my father’s, however, we are very secure deep within the castle. Do not worry dear Ava. I will keep you safe.” Kagewaki offers her a kind smile.

“Arigato, and where does Naraku reside?”

“He is in a guest chamber far down the hall. Would you feel safer near him?” Kagewaki sounds hurt.

“Ie, I was only curious.”

“Good. Come sit with me and talk. It has been too long.” Kagewaki moves to sit while pulling Avalon down with him. He brings them down onto two zabuton (cushion) around a chabudai (low round table) Avalon sits with her legs to the side. “You do not sit seiza style?”

“Ie.” ‘I have to be very careful not to call him Naraku.’

“Ava, you still seem reluctant to tell me of yourself.”

“I am not very good with conversations, but if you ask a question, I will likely answer it.” ‘What can I do to get out of this?’

“Hmm, where are you from?”

“Not here.” ‘Stay calm Avalon.’ 

“Will you give me no more?”

Avalon answers in an even tone, “I don’t see why where I come from matters.”

“Do you not wish to return?”

“Ie.”

“Naze?”

Avalon shrugs her shoulders. ‘Be cool’ “There is nothing there for me any more.”

“Family, friends?”

“I have none.”

“You are old enough to be married, but you have no husband. Did he pass?”

“I never had a husband.”

‘She never was married.’ “Ava, you are a beauty beyond compare, why were you never married?”

“I never pursued any relationships.”

“How have you survived on your own? You must have wealth. I notice your hands are not scarred as a normal farm girl would be.”

Avalon nods. ‘Fuck it. Why not let him think I come from wealth.’ “Hai, I had wealth and never needed to perform physical labor.”

“I see, but you left it behind to come here?”

“It would seem so. Kagewaki, I am quite tired. Would it be alright if I were to go to sleep and we talk more in the morning?”

“Oh, I am so sorry Ava. I completely forgot how late it is. Please rest. I will see you in the morning.” Kagewaki stands up and bows his head to Avalon and walks to the adjoining door. “If you need to use the bathing area.” He points to another door. “It is through there and if you move to the next door it leads to the outhouse. Good night Ava.”

“Good night Kagewaki.” Avalon bows her head as Kagewaki slides the shoji screen door open and steps into his room, closing it behind him. Avalon gets up and breathes a sigh of relief. ‘I have to remain calm. I can’t panic. Fuck! I have to figure out what he knows and what he wants with me. Until he makes a move I can’t let him know I am against him.’ Avalon plops down scrubbing at her face. 

She collects herself again and gets up to look around and sees everything has been set up for her. Several lamps are lit. A large futon was laid out. Avalon’s eyes harden. ‘So he planned on me coming here. Does he really think I will be his pawn?’ “Hmm.” She sweeps her eyes about and they land on the tsukeshoin (desk). 'Perhaps I will ask for some writing utensils.’ 

Avalon glances down at the kodana (cabinet) opening the door. There are a bunch of beautiful kimonos and obis. ‘Trying to buy me Naraku?’ Avalon closes the door and walks over to the futon. 

She moves to the door Kagewaki indicated was the bathing room. Sliding the door open, she sees a tub large enough for several people to bathe in and a small basin of water. Beyond that, there is another door but to the right she sees another shoji screen. Avalon walks over and slides it open out of curiosity. Gazing into the darkened room she sees a futon and quickly realizes it leads to Kagewaki’s room. She sees a body laying under the covers breathing. ‘Sick bastard, not only do we share adjoining rooms, we share a bathing area.’ 

Avalon quietly slides the door shut with a light click. Looking about the room, she sees several white kimonos. ‘You think I will bathe with you around?’

She reaches into the basin, bringing some water to rinse her face and hands. Shaking her hands to dry them, she walks back to her sleeping area and lays on the futon. She summons Murasaki no Raikō to her side. She would take no chances sleeping in Naraku’s home. She would prepare herself for battle the best she can. ‘I have to get out of here some how.’ And with that she falls into a fitful sleep.

A few hours later Avalon wakes up. She blinks her eyes processing what she sees, the fine wood and silky bedding."Mhhhhh." 'That's right, I'm Naraku's captive. Well at least he didn't do anything to me while I slept.' Avalon hears a knock.

A feminine voice speaks. "Lady Ava, may I come in?"

Avalon considers for a moment, then springs out of bed and goes to the door holding her sword. She sees the person bowing through the door. "Enter."

The lady stands and opens the door. As she walks in, Avalon presses the sword against the young ladies throat. She had brown hair and brown eyes. She is not remarkably beautiful but she isn’t ugly either. The young woman is in a plain light green yukata. The woman freezes as she feels the blade against her neck and questions, "My Lady?"

Avalon keeps the sword at her throat as she pushes reiki into the blade. The skin stays in tact. 'Not a demon.' "Who are you?"

"Getsumei (月明) my Lady."

'Moonlight interesting.' "Naze are you here?"

"I am to be your servant my Lady."

"Where do you hale from?"

"A village not far from the castle."

"Hmmm…" Avalon slowly lowers her blade. Getsumei takes a deep breath. "So you will do as I say?"

"Hai, my Lady."

“I am hungry, can you fetch me something to eat?”

“Lord Kagewaki requested that you join him to eat after I help you dress.”

“I see.” ‘Of course he did.’ “Very well, help me dress.”

“Do you not wish to bathe?”

“I suppose, however you will watch the door. I do not want the Lord to join me.”

“My Lady, I wouldn’t think he would. He is a kind and honorable Lord.”

“I am just overly cautious I suppose.” 

“As a lady should be. Her virtue must stay intact till marriage.”

Avalon hmms her agreement. “Please set up my bath then.”

“Hai.” Getsumei rushes out the door to gather hot water to fill the tub for Avalon.

Avalon walks over to her bed and sits down. She holds her sword, looking at the purple lightning etched into the blade and studies the way it reflects the light coming in through the windows. Her face contorts into a scowl. ‘What are you planning Naraku? You must think I have something to offer you. Why else let me take hold of such a blade. I have to figure a way out of this. I can’t count on anyone saving me but me.’

“Lady Ava?” Getsumei’s voice brings Avalon out of her musings.

“Hmmm?”

“The bath is ready.”

“Arigato.”

“You need not thank me. I am a servant and it is unfitting.”

“I suppose it is.” Avalon rises off the bed and walks to the bathing area, stripping off her clothing and rinsing her body with the basin water, then stepping into the bath water.

“What oils would you like?”

“None, but I would like some sabonsō ( **さぼん草** soapwort).”

“I don't have any here.”

“Then once I am done bathing and I am dressed, I would like as much fetched for me as possible. I need the leaves and stems.”

“As you wish my Lady, but might I ask what for?”

“I will be using it to bathe with.”

Getsumei looks at Avalon with skepticism but nods her head. “Very well, my Lady.”

Avalon stands from the tub as Getsumei wraps a yukata around her. She steps out and allows herself to dry. Getsumei leads her into the bedroom and moves to one of the kodana pulling several kimonos from it.

“I will only wear three.”

“MY LADY!?”

“You are lucky I am even considering wearing three and one will be a juban.”

Getsumei bows her head and grabs a juban and two other kimonos. One is a deep red with white chrysanthemums and the other, a light blue with purple butterflies.

“The red one will be the outer kimono.”

“Hai.”

Getsumei moves quickly to dress Avalon and uses a deep purple obi to tie it all together, creating an elaborate bow in the back for her. Getsumi opens the shoji door to the hall and walks behind Avalon directing her where to go. Avalon walks through an open door and sees Kagewaki sitting by himself at a low table fit to seat many people. Avalon pauses at the door unsure where to sit.

Kagewaki looks up giving Avalon a charming smile. He stands and walks over to her.

“Lady Ava, you look splendid. Please, join me?” Kagewaki grasps Avalon’s elbow and seats her next to him at the head of the table. “I told you, you will be treated as a queen. I would not lie.”

“You are too kind Kagewaki.” ‘How deceptive of you.’

“Nonsense, I am only too happy to have you by my side Ava. Speaking of which, I have summoned a Miko to come train you.”

“You did?” Avalon questions incredulously.

“Why of course. The sword is wielded by none other than a Miko and I know you are not well trained.”

“You are correct. I am not well trained.” Avalon admits, there’s no point in denying it. ‘If I can train and get good enough, I might be able to escape you, Naraku.’

“I notice you also carried a katana before. Did you know how to use it?”

“I’ve had training but not much practical experience.”

“I see...would you like my advisor Naraku to aid you in training?”

“I would not object.”

“Very well then, he will.” He lifts his tea up to his mouth, drinking slowly. He caresses Avalon’s cheek with his knuckles, then traces the bones just under her eyes. “Your eyes are unlike any I have ever seen. Where did you say you were from?” 

Avalon stills herself from pulling away, even as her skin crawls at his touch. “I didn’t.” 

“Do they all look like you?” His eyebrow raises as the fingers trail from her eyes, down her cheek, behind the lobe of her ear, and across the sensitive skin of her neck. 

Avalon slightly bends her head as if the area was ticklish. “That tickles Kagewaki. But no, where I come from everyone has unique features.” 

“I have heard of foreigners coming to our lands before. Do you speak a different tongue where you are from?” His hand remains on her neck as he leans closer, massaging the area with his thumb. 

“I do.” Avalon stiffens as his thumb presses into her neck. She smiles to keep from sneering at his touch. 

“Speak for me Ava,” he mutters affectionately in her ear, his breath beating at her skin. 

Avalon turns her head to look at his face and gives him an adoring eye. She takes on an affectionate tone dropping an octave to sound more sensual speaking in English and says, “Kagewaki ,  _ I would be a fool to fall for you _ .” She gives him an award winning smile. ‘I just have to act like his charms are working.’ 

His belly boils at the sound of her voice. His finger slides over her shoulder, dipping into the back of her kimono. “Beautiful.” He scoots closer to her until their sides are touching. “Are you not hungry? You haven’t touched your food.” 

“Oh my, our conversation was so riveting I nearly forgot.” Scooting herself away, she reaches for her chopsticks and the dish of rice in front of her. ‘Give me an excuse, any excuse to get away from you please.’ “When do you think the Miko will arrive to train me?” 

Keeping his hand on her back he says, “She should be arriving tomorrow. So we have all of today together.”

Avalon gives a tight smile. “Lovely.” She picks up the dish of rice and starts eating, taking small bits 

“They don’t have Miko’s where you come from?” 

“None that I know of. Why?” 

“No reason,” he considers what she has said, then continues, “tell me Ava,” his arm slithers around her waist, up the side of her stomach, “if you are unattached, have you known the pleasure of a man.” 

Avalon’s eyes widen at the insinuation and her hand slides down to her stomach taking his hand off. “I have never known the pleasure of a man.” 

“Then why have you chosen to remain single? Certainly you know how dangerous that is.” His hand came around her waist again, his mouth near her neck. “Some derelict male, might have his way with you. A married woman...at least she would be protected.” 

Avalon counters, “Marriage protects nothing. If I were to be taken by another male, my supposed husband would have every right to abandon me. Are you a derelict male Kagewaki?” 

“You tell me, sweet Ava,” his lips come down on her shoulder. “Are you so above other women you would deny a Lord?” 

“Would you punish me for denying you?” She tilts her head away from his face 

“Perhaps another night,” he slides his fingers down her sides, running them along her hip. “Tell me more about yourself. What was your home like? Your parents?” 

“Very different from here, my parents are dead.” Avalon rolls her shoulders. “They died a long time ago. What else do you wish to know dear Kagewaki?” ‘God I hate myself right now,’ Avalon scolds herself 

“Everything of course,” his mind races with the information she has given him. She has more to tell him and he knows it. “Have you heard of the Shikon no Tama?” 

“What an odd name?” 

“So you don’t know of it?” 

“I’ve heard rumors of it being in this land. Can you tell me more about it?” 

A steady smirk crosses his face. “What rumors have you heard?” 

“Only that it was destroyed when a Miko took it to her burning pire.” Avalon smiles charmingly at Kagewaki. 

He decides to press his luck, bringing a ball of rice up to her lips. “I have heard rumors too, about you.” He waits for her to open her mouth. As she does, biting down on the rice, he whispers in her ear, “that you know more about what I am looking for.” 

Quickly chewing and swallowing her bite, she speaks, “Rumors are just that Kagewaki rumors. Some are true, some are false, and others are exaggerations.” Avalon turns her head letting her breath ghost over his lips dropping her voice, “Do tell dear Kagewaki, what are you looking for?” 

“A partner,” he presses his lips into hers, parting them with his tongue. “An ally.” He cups her chin, opening her mouth wider with his thumb and attempting to press her shoulders back. 

Avalon’s eyes widen. She keeps her back up right with her left hand going behind to support her as he presses her backwards. Her right hand reaches into his hair threading her fingers along his scalp. She grasps at the hair, pulling his head back. “And you think to find that in me?” Avalon wants to vomit from the invasion on her person, but keeps an inquisitive look on her face. She had not expected him to take such liberties with her, but she knew she was playing a dangerous game. 

“Are you shy Ava?” His fingers creep down her shoulders, going for her chest as his lips press into hers again. “What do you want?” 

Avalon grips his hair harder, her gaze hardening. “Shy isn’t the word I would use, I am not a toy Kagewaki. Tell me what you are after.” 

Before she can react, he raises a knife to her neck and hisses in her ear, “would you resist me?” The blade slithers playfully along her throat, digging in enough to sting. “I am after the truth, a truth you have held back.” 

“What truth do you seek?” 

“What do you know about the Shikon no Tama. I have ears everywhere, Ava...there is a reason I came for you. You know it will return soon. I want to know how.” 

“The Shikon no Tama? Is that what you are after? Why would a Lord want a wretched thing like that?” 

“Why would you protest telling me? Let me tell you a secret Ava, you give me more with what you refuse to say than what you do.” 

“Do I Onigumo?” 

“So you know me?” He smiles devilishly. 

Avalon smirks. “I know many things. What would you give me if I let you in? Gave you what I know?” 

“You aren’t in the position to ask, yet, Ava,” he slides the knife between her breasts, flirtatiously. “What are you willing to offer?” 

“I have the upper hand actually.” Avalon runs her hand down his face along his arm holding the blade, “You don’t know what I know and what I don’t know. But if I’m dead,” she shrugs, “you will never know what I could offer.” 

“Who’s fault will that be if you deny me?” 

“Mine I suppose but if I tell you what I know, how can I be sure I’ll live?” 

“If you know me, you know you can trust me,” he removes the knife, caressing her neck. 

‘I trust a snake more.’ “Well, what have you heard so far and I will fill in the blanks.” 

“I have heard that the jewel will return. How and when?”

“How, a reincarnation of the late Miko, when is a little more ambiguous I am not at all certain of the time but within the next year I assume.”

“Hmmm and you can give me no more on that?”

“No.”

“How do you know me?” Naraku grins at Avalon

“I recognize your guise. I know the history of Onigumo, Naraku, Kikyo, and Inuyasha. Not all of it, but enough.”

“History that was some 50 years again and I did not leave witnesses. Who told you these tales?” He presses himself against Avalon brushing his hand along her breast.

“There was a prophet, I guess you could say that told your tale and I read their work.”

“Hmmmm and you know this person?” he purrs into her ear.

“No. I do not.”

“Does this person's work extend into the future?”

“I don’t know, I guess I will find out if the jewel returns as I believe it will.”

Naraku nods his head getting off of Avalon allowing her to get up. Avalon brushes herself off.

“If the shikon no tama returns, I will have you at my side Ava. Until then, enjoy the pleasures of the castle and Naraku will help train you with your sword.”

“You mean your puppet will train me. Do not think me as such a fool Naraku.”

Kagewaki nods his head. “Quite right but if the jewel does not return Ava…” he left the threat hanging in the air.

Avalon gives him a tight nod and rushes back to her room. She pushes the shoji screen open and walks in closing it behind her. Taking a deep breath she sits on the floor. ‘So I will still be trained that will be a mistake you will live to regret Naraku.’

After a few hours of pacing her room, she hears light footsteps. Avalon summons her sword and holds it close.

“Lady Ava would you like some tea?” calls Getsumei’s voice

Avalon sighs, a drink of tea. She could use that. “Sure bring it in.”

Avalon’s door slides open and Getsumei rises with the tray of tea and presents it to Avalon. “Is there anything else I can get you? Lord Kagewaki insisted you are to be given anything you desire.”

Avalon’s eyebrow raises. “Oh? I would like scrolls, ink and a few quills.”

“You are educated?”

“Do you question your Lady?”

“No I am sorry, I will have those fetched for you. I have already dispatched servants to gather sabonsō.”

“Very well leave me.” ‘I do not trust this Getsumei. I can not afford to trust or become attached to anyone here.’

Getsumei exits the room with haste. Getsumei walks down the hall where Kagewaki steps out in front of her.

“Has she given anything away?”

“My Lord I believe she is educated, she asked for writing utensils.”

“Anything else?”

“No, my Lord.”

“Very well, keep me apprised of her requests and anything you learn.”

“Hai.” Getsumei bows as Kagewaki walks by leaving her behind.

Avalon sips at her tea wondering what she can do in the meantime. Setting the tea down, she starts pulling all the clothing out of the kodana searching for hakama. She finds a few and changes out of the over burdensome kimonos and uses the Hakama and a yukata and obi to secure her clothing. She straps her regular katana to her side. She secures her hair in a tight bun. 

Sliding the adjoining door to Kagewaki’s room open, she looks inside to see him seated over some scrolls. He looks up surprised to see her change of clothing and the change in her demeanor.

Avalon walks straight in disregarding all formalities. She stands over him as he looks up at her. “It’s time to train. You will train me and I will wield this sword.” She points to her hip. “It is a mortal weapon. It cannot hurt you...much.” She winks at him. “I promise not to draw Murasaki no Raikō against you while we train as long as you promise to treat it as training and use no demonic abilities against me.” She smiles down at the stund Lord. ‘Good going Avalon, keep him on his toes.’ 

Kagewaki recomposes his face and smirks at the cocky woman before him. “You are a breath of fresh air Ava.”

“I assume you wish for me to call you Kagewaki?”

“That would be helpful.”

“I have no reason to out you to the castle. They would only perish in your miasma, if they tried to rise up against you. The dead stink and can’t keep house.” Avalon brushes off coolly. She would have to harden her heart. Not only did she not want people to die, she did not want Naraku to know she would care if he tried to use them against her. 

Avalon closes the shoji screen to her room and steps out his door. She calls over her shoulder, “You coming.” Avalon walks with confidence in her step as she traverses the hall she walked before. Stepping into the outer courtyard, she waits for Kagewaki to come out. Moments later Kagewaki steps out, his hair in a high topknot, in hakama, bare chested and a sword over his shoulder.

“Are you sure you wish to do this Ava?”

Avalon pops her neck. “Most definitely.” ‘This is going to fucking hurt but what better way to get to know the enemy?’

Kagewaki steps at a leisurely pace to be in front of Avalon.

Avalon pulls her sword from her obi, readying her stance and gripping the handle with both hands. Kagewaki keeps the katana laying on his shoulder waiting for Avalon to charge. 

Avalon purses her lips waiting for Kagewaki to move to strike. The two circle each other.

“Are you afraid to strike a woman?”

Kagewaki raises his brow keeping his cool. “Do you fear me Ava?”

“Not at this moment Kagewaki.” Avalon smiles, he can try to get her to strike first but it will be fruitless. “But I am growing bored. I didn’t know we would be dancing.”

“Dancing you say?” Kagewaki loses his patience and brings his sword down on Avalon’s left shoulder. Avalon turns her blade to the side allowing the side of the blade to take the blow while rolling the right side of her body towards him. She uses her right elbow to hit him just below the sternum. She twists left with her whole body and sword striking at his abdomen while stepping back to get a little distance between her and Kagewaki. She brings the sword around again to create even more distance. She observes him keenly. She would need to learn everything she can. 

Kagewaki moves in to strike at her again swinging down and from the right to left while she stops the blade with her sword. Kagewaki lashes out with his leg to trip Avalon, causing her to fall to the ground on her back. Avalon swings her blade in a large arc around her body keeping him at bay, while she springs up using her back and powerful legs to right herself. 

‘Damn that hurt.’ Avalon repositions herself. She would allow him to strike at her. She didn’t need him learning her moves. Kagewaki brought his sword down on Avalon multiple times and Avalon ended up bruised and bloody from the punches and kicks she received as her blade was occupied. 

Her shoulder was torn from a slash he had landed before she could respond. Then with the 15th blow her body received, she stayed down. “I give Kagewaki. I am done for the day.”

Kagewaki steps over Avalon with feet on either side and kneels over her hips. He brings his hand to touch her temple glide his fingers along her cheek bringing his thumb to brush over her busted lip. ‘She did well in protecting her face.’ Kagewaki leans down and licks her busted lip. 

Avalon wants to gag. She can feel the familiar sting of yoki, it is clear Naraku was healing her lip. He then presses his lips to hers forcing them to part for his demanding tongue. He pulls back to look at her stunned blue green eyes. “I don’t want such beauty marred.” With that, he gets up and holds his hand out to Avalon. 

Avalon hesitantly takes his hand, Kagewaki lifts her off the ground. “Come it will be time to eat soon and you should be tended to.”

Avalon nods her heads and moves to brush past him to the castle but he keeps her at his side. “Kagewaki?”

“I said you need to be tended to I will tend to you.”

Avalon’s eyebrow rose. “Ahh.” She forces a smile as Kagewaki leads her to his room. “Shouldn’t I be in my own room?”

“Oh Ava you seem to own this room as well, the way you walk in so proudly,” he purrs as he makes her sit with him. Kagewaki pulls at her yukata to expose her slashed left shoulder.

“Let me.” Avalon pulls her shoulder out of the yukata so he could see the cut.

Kagewaki stares at the shoulder, admiring the soft pale skin. “Such flawless skin, you did come from wealth.”

Avalon nods 

“Allow me to keep it that way.” Without waiting for a reply he bends his head down as his tongue slithers out to lick alone the red gash. He brings his mouth down on her wound, licking and kissing to heal the wound. “You taste devine Ava. I would love to sample more of you.”

Avalon tries to not shudder with disgust but fails. Kagewaki thinks his charms are working. He moves to push the yukata further down. 

Avalon catches his hand. “Don’t,” she whispers. “You want me to trust you, don't try to force yourself on me.”

Kagewaki looks up with heavy lids and nods his head. Avalon can’t believe she is about to do what she is about to do, but she has to give him hope there is something if he doesn’t try to force her. She leans down, closing her eyes. She imagines kissing Adrian Paul as she kisses Kagewaki. Allowing him to slide his tongue into her mouth, she greets him with a dance. She slowly pulls away to smile at him. “Time. It is what I need okay?”

Kagewaki nods with half lidded eyes. 

Avalon gets up without Kagewaki stopping her. She walks to the shoji screen connecting their rooms sliding it open and closing it as she steps into her room. Walking to the bathing area she pulls the yukata off to rinse her arms and face. She accidentally lets tears slip before she quickly wipes them away. She grabs a new yukata and steps back into her room. She then notices that the clothing had been put away and there was writing material on the tsukeshoin. 

‘So my room is not left alone while I am away?’ Avalon sits at the tsukeshoin and pulls one of the empty scrolls open. She dips a quill in the ink pot and begins to draw an intricate flower. It would serve as an outlet. She knows everything she does will be monitored or she would have written but Naraku has learned enough about her. He didn’t need to know she could read and write too.

A soft knock came from her door. “My Lady.”

Avalon speaks without emotion, “Enter Getsumei.” 

“You’re not dressed for dinner.”

“Observant aren’t you.” Avalon stands to face her. “Dress me again with only 2 kimonos and a juban. I will keep my hakama on.”

“Hai.” Getsumei grabs two kimonos and a juban. The first one was purple with pink cherry blossoms and the other was light green with white flowers. Getsumei presents the two kimonos to Avalon, knowing she will insist on choosing which is worn on the outside.

“I don’t care whichever,” Avalon dismisses

Getsumei decides on putting the purple one on the outside.

“Where is the pack that was on my horse?”

“It must still be in the stable my Lady.”

“You will take me to retrieve it.”

“Hai.”

Getsumei finishes dressing Avalon and goes to leave.

“Where are you going? WE are going to the stables now.”

“Oh my apologies, it slipped my mind.”

Avalon presses her lips together, ‘liar.’ “Let’s go.”

Avalon opens the shoji screen to the hall and steps through the door waiting for Getsumei to follow. Avalon closes the door. “After you.”

Getsumei leads them through the hall and out the back to the stables. Avalon quickens her pace to find Ten’un. The stable boy is tending the horses. “Boy,” Avalon’s clear voice rings out, grabbing the young man's attention. “The horse I came on had a pack, I require it.” The young man rushes into the equipment area and brings a very familiar pack out to Avalon bowing while he presents it to her. Avalon snatches the pack and turns her back not gracing him with any further interaction.

Avalon walks back to the castle at a brisk pace leaving Getsumei behind “My Lady, please wait.”

“I haven’t the time.” Avalon calls over her shoulder. She moves quickly down the hall to her room and opens the door to slam it closed behind her on Getsumei’s face “Leave me. I will join the Lord in a moment.” Avalon opens the pack pulling out the comb and kimono Sesshomaru gave her. ‘Why did I feel the need to protect these?’ 

Avalon takes the comb and slides it into an outerwall’s silk in the corner where it will be obscured. The kimono she looks over and wonders what to do to protect it. She pulls up her futon and then pulls up a tatami mat. Putting the kimono under the mat, then under the futon. Getsumei waits outside the door for Avalon. Avalon takes the rest of her pack and scatters the contents about her room in various places. She places all items in strategic locations to let her know if someone was snooping in her room. Avalon then slides the door open. “Getsumei, I do not want anyone in my room unless I am there, understand?” 

Getsumei bows, “Hai.”

“Good.” Avalon walks to the dining area to see Kagewaki sitting, waiting for her. “Kagewaki.” Avalon bows her head 

“Ava.” Kagewaki motions with his hand for her to sit next to him again.

Avalon sits where Kagewaki indicates. Servants rush out and place food before the Lord and guest.

Avalon grabs her chopsticks and starts eating without waiting for Kagewaki. She knows it’s not acceptable and rude, but she wants to see what she can push, plus she is hungry. 

Kagewaki grabs his food and starts eating as well. They chat here and there with Kagewaki making advances on Avalon throughout the meal. Avalon’s fear rises each time his hand brushes against her flesh and she knows she has to escape that night. After they finish eating, Avalon bids Kagewaki good night. 

Avalon heads back to her room. She pulls the futon up and the mat, grabbing the kimono and pulling the comb from the wall. She removes the extra kimonos and dresses in new clean hakama. She puts on the kimono and ties the obi around her, making for worthy travel. She puts her hair in a tight bun and uses the comb to secure the hair. She waits until she hears the staff is asleep and the household is silent. She slides open the shoji to the bathing area and opens the screen that leads outside. Silently she makes her way across the courtyard and slips into the trees. She doesn’t know exactly where to go, she just knows she has to get away.

She travels quietly in the trees for a few hours and suddenly hears branches being snapped behind her. She spins around, instantly summoning Murasaki no Raikō into her hand, when she sees the familiar baboon pelt. She readies herself for the confrontation. She already could tell it was his puppet. She warns in a deadly tone, “Leave me be.” 

“I cannot comply.” Tentacles shootout at her. She slashes at the tentacles with her sword. They fall to the ground as more replace the ones she sliced off. She suddenly feels vines constrict around her body. Looking down, she sees that the tentacles she had cut off have shot up to stop her movements. “Release me!”

“I cannot, I need to take you back.” 

Avalon struggles against her bonds as the puppet moves behind her. The puppet commands the tentacles to encircle her wrists, bringing them behind her back and binding her ankles, freeing the rest of her body. He lifts her up and slings her over his shoulder leaving Murasaki no Raikō laying on the ground. Avalon wiggles in his grasp but he holds firm to her and carries her back to the castle. 

He walks down the hall with Avalon in his arms and she remains silent. Speaking won’t do any good anyway. The puppet slides the shoji screen open to Kagewaki’s room, walks in and deposits Avalon on Kagewaki’s futon. Avalon rights herself the best she can, kneeling before Kagewaki and stares up at him with a defiant look. Kagewaki stands at the foot of the futon towering over her in a simple sleeping yukata. The puppet leaves closing the shoji screen behind him.

In a flat tone Avalon says, “Kagewaki.” 

“Going somewhere?” He leans over her menacingly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please COMMENT AND KUDO!!!


	15. Butterfly in a Spider’s Web

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *****Trigger Warning on this Chapter*****
> 
> Avalon finally understands Kagewaki's true intentions and meets the Miko that will train her to use her sword.

**WARNING CHAPTER CONTAINS RAPE (*****) shows where it starts and ends.**

Kagewaki looms over Avalon, who is bound on top of his futon.

“Going somewhere?” He leans over her menacingly.

“Apparently not.” She keeps a calm face but her eyes blaze.

“Are you unhappy in my home?” He runs his fingers up her side, ghosting over her chest, her neck and then cups her chin massaging her bottom lip. “Is there something you need? Something….you desire?” He leans his lips against hers, brushing them lightly. 

“I want to be free to leave. Is that too much to ask?” She eyes him slyly.

“How far?” He brushes his nose up her cheek, sniffing her skin. “How will I know you won’t run?” 

“There is no place I can go you wouldn’t be able to find me, if you truly wished to. I’m no fool. Your puppet found me in the woods. Why wouldn’t you be able to find me again? So why would it matter if I ran?” 

“The question is,” he traces his finger across her chest teasingly, “how much you care?” He walks behind her sitting down, pulling the comb from her bun. He gathers her hair in his fingers, combing out the tangles. “There is a girl you were travelling with, if I am not mistaken. She was lame in the arm and leg. What would you do to protect her?” 

“Was there? I don’t remember any lame girl.” 

“You’re lying,” he sneers at her. “You’re shaking like a leaf. I wonder,” he sniffs the dip of her neck, “if you would be so dishonest if I had her brought here, with the little puppy that follows her around. There’s no one there to protect her now, in Kaede’s village.” 

Avalon closes her eyes taking a deep breath and just above a whisper says, “Don’t…”

“Don’t what? Such a sweet girl. I wonder how she would taste, especially if you leave. Do you think she will scream?”

“Leave her alone. I’ll stay, just leave her be.”

“But you must make me a promise, dear Ava.” He drags his tongue over her shoulder, up her neck. “Will you promise me something, Ava?” 

“What do you want from me?” Avalon sighs in defeat. 

“You will give yourself freely to me. When I want you, as I want you, the information I want when I want it. You will give your soul, to me.” 

“I...I...I please don’t ask that of me.” 

He laughs threateningly. “It’s you or the girl, you decide. If you refuse me, I will have her brought here and she will take your place. Know this, as she cries and begs for it to stop, it will be your fault...every pain I cause her, every tear, will be on you,” he speaks slowly and deliberately in her ear. 

“She can’t give you what you want Kagewaki, I can. I will give you my body and when you ask me something, I will tell you the truth. Just leave her alone.” 

“Good girl.” Kagewaki waves his hands and the tentacles dissipate into wisps of smoke that disperse into the air. “Now my little one, I will have you begging for me to take you.”

Avalon brings her wrists forward and flexes them to relieve the ache. ‘You think so huh?’ Avalon looks over her shoulder at Kagewaki with half lidded eyes. “I have to beg you?”

Kagewaki nods his head. An idea clicks in her head, ‘if I can get a promise out of him then perhaps...’ 

Avalon turns around to face Kagewaki, keeping her eyes submissive. She tentatively reaches her right hand out to touch Kagewaki’s shoulder. Kagewaki watches her movements with suspicion. Once her hand is on his shoulder she starts to massage it and finally looks up at his face with an innocent expression. “You know, I’ve never been in bed with a man. I’m not at all sure what to do. I didn’t lie when I said I have never known the pleasure of a man. I’ll confess I am no virgin. I have been raped but that isn’t pleasure by any means.”

“Oh and what of the demon who accompanied you to the village?”

“What about him? He would abuse me. He wanted what I gave you.”

“Hmmm, so you and he were never intimate.” Kagewaki eyes her skeptically 

“We kissed and he took liberties he shouldn’t have,” Avalon says bitterly

“And if you saw him again what would you do?”

“What do you mean?”

“Me or him? Who would you choose?”

“He abandoned me and he would do it again. You keep me here and I cannot leave, so I would choose you.”

“You can leave Ava but you know what would happen if you did.”

“Exactly. So I would stay with you.”

Kagewaki smiles approvingly. “Good.” 

He leans in to kiss Avalon. Avalon meets him in the kiss bringing her other hand to his other shoulder. She snakes her hands into his hair and pulls him closer to her deepening the kiss, parting her lips to allow him to penetrate her. 

Kagewaki grabs her around the shoulders, pulling her closer to his body. The kiss only breaks to allow them to breath. “Mmmm, you do taste superb.” 

Avalon smiles at the compliment, even if she wants to hurl. She is stuck. He threatened the one person she showed her heart to. She wants to cry. 

Kagewaki moves his hand to untie her obi. Avalon slips her hands down his chest grabbing for the stings of his yukata. As the obi falls off her, she shrugs her shoulders out of the kimono and moves to pull it off balling it up and tossing it aside. Kagewaki takes a look at the bare breast presented before him. “Exquisite.” Avalon looks down as he moves one hand to slide up her stomach between her breasts, along her sternum. “You are incredibly fit, Ava.”

Avalon looks at his face and can see that he is really complimenting her. “Arigato Kagewaki. I workout often.”

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

His head sinks down to her right breast taking the nipple into his mouth. Avalon rises up to make it easier for him. She clings to his body pushing herself against him. She gasps as if she is enjoying herself. She closes her eyes forcing the tears back. Avalon brushes his hair aside leans down and starts sucking and kissing his neck. 

Kagewaki stops sucking on her breast surprised at her eagerness. He turns his head. 

She pulls back as he faces her. She pushes him down on the bed straddling his hips and starts kissing him. He grinds his member into her crotch. She moves with him, to give him a pleasurable experience. As her hands move about his chest, Kagewaki grabs her hips to force her to bear down on his erection harder. She lets him guide her movements. Finally wanting to finish it, Kagwaki moves to pull the strings on Avalon’s hakama. Avalon helps pull her hakama off. Kagewaki flips her over and spreads her legs. He places his thumb on her clit and stimulates her. Avalon bucks into his hand involuntarily as she whimpers, “Kagewaki.”

He continues to stimulate her until he sees her on the edge of an orgasim then pulls his hand away. “Beg for it Ava.”

“You can’t be serious Kagewaki.” Avalon says as if frustrated, yet she is smiling inside. Can she pull it off?

“Beg.” Kagwaki smirks as he sees her legs spreading and can see the way her body looks desperate for the release.

“I won’t beg.” Avalon closes her eyes. 

“You will or I will never fill you.” He places his hand back on her clit and slides a finger in her. Avalon thrusts herself onto the finger as if she is desperate for the penetrating. “I can tell you need this Ava. All you have to do is beg to be sated.”

“Kagewaki is there no other way? I don’t want to beg.”

Kagewaki wiggles his finger inside her and she writhes around. “Beg.”

“You promise there is no other way?”

Kagewaki gets frustrated with her unwillingness to beg and adds another finger and starts pumping in and out of her. “No you will beg me or I promise, I will not fill you.” He pulls his fingers from her. 

The relief Avalon feels is immeasurable. Avalon’s eyes open. “I will try to see if I can break that promise of yours.” Avalon sits up and moves quicker than Kagewaki is expecting to attack him with a kiss that has more desperation in it that he has ever felt before. Avalon sticks several of her fingers inside herself and brings out her fingers covered in her juices. She moves her fingers together to coat them all. She reaches her hand down to Kagewaki’s manhood and starts pumping him. She will get him to cum without being in her. She pumps faster and tightens her grip as she feels his cock stain within her grasp. ‘Just a little more’ 

Kagewaki hisses, “That’s not how….Ahhhh.” As he feels his release under Avalon’s minstraions. He cums on Avalon’s stomach and it drips down as she lays back. Kagewaki allows himself to lay next to Avalon.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

He cockily says, “I got my release but you are still unsated. Like I said, you will beg for me to fill you.”

Avalon stares up at the ceiling feeling her skin crawl from being covered in his fluid and by what she did to avoid being raped tonight. “It would seem you win tonight Kagewaki.” Avalon goes to get up but Kagewaki reaches out stopping her movements. “Where are you going?”

“I am going to rinse off and then go to bed.”

“Ava, you will be sleeping in my bed from now on.”

Avalon nods and pushes herself off the futon. She grabs her comb and her clothing. ‘Thank goodness. I didn’t want to lose any of these.’ She slides the shoji screen to the bathing area and quickly cleans herself off slipping on a yukata. She walks into her room, putting the clothing on the futon and puts the comb on the tsukeshoin. Satisfied, she slides the shoji screen open to step into Kagewaki’s room. She walks around blowing out the lamps and crawls into bed with Kagewaki. She brings him up to kiss her and asks, “Are you sure?”

“Will you beg?”

“No.”

He smiles wickedly. “You will in time dear Ava.” He pulls her head to rest on his chest, as his hand runs up and down her back. Avalon cuddles into his side, using his chest as a pillow. ‘You just keep thinking that, you bastard.’ With those last thoughts, she allows herself to fall asleep.

Avalon awakes alone in Kagewaki’s bed. She slips out into her room and quickly hides the kimono below her futon. She waits for Getsumie to come for her. Sure enough, within a few minutes she hears the familiar knock.

“Come in Getsumie.”

Getsumie steps in and helps her dress. Once dressed, Avalon steps out into the hall to walk to the dining area. Stepping through the door, she sees a small elderly female with grey hair sitting at the table with Kagewaki. Kagewaki looks up at her with a wicked smile. “Ava, my dear. This is Nisshoku, ( **日食** ) the miko I told you about. Join us.” Kagewaki pats the seat next to him. 

Avalon walks with her head up, but she knows she cannot escape. The night before was trying to say the least. Avalon sits at Kagewaki’s side. 

Kagewaki snakes an arm around Avalon’s lower back and pulls her closer to his side. A servant rushes out to place food in front of Avalon. Avalon nods her head at the servant. 

Kagewaki’s hand slides along Avalons thigh, threatening to dip lower but only rubbing along the top as he keeps his arm around her. Avalon’s heart begins beating faster. “Lady Nisshoku has so graciously accepted my request to train you.”

Avalon looks over at Nisshoku and nods her head. “Arigato.”

Kagewaki’s free hand reaches over and gently grabs Avalon’s chin to make her face him. “Hmmm?” he looks at her with questioning eyes.

“Arigato Kagewaki.”

Kagewaki smiles as he moves his lips to Avalon’s and presses them to hers. Avalon pushes through her aversion to appear happy for his affection. ‘I will have to play the part of the submissive happy female if I want to survive.’ 

His tongue prods at her lips, asking for entrance. Avalon opens to allow him entrance and lets herself get lost in the kiss. She just has to imagine it was with someone else. Kagewaki slowly pulls away biting her bottom lip and lets it slide through his teeth. It snaps back. 

Avalon sucks on her bottom lip. “Eat and get to know Nisshoku. I have things I must attend to.” Kagewaki’s hand slides up Avalon’s thigh and stomach and along her ribs as he pulls his arm away. Avalon nods “Do not worry, I will see you tonight.” 

Avalon shivers involuntarily. Kagewaki notices and lets a wicked grin spread across his face. He turns and exits the room. Avalon watches him leave as her heartbeat finally starts to slow. She takes a calming breath and looks back to the miko. Avalon puts a charming smile on her face. “Lady Nisshoku, it is a pleasure to meet you.”

The woman has a sly look about her. “The pleasure is mine. I look forward to training the Murasaki no Raikō Miko.”

Avalon nods her head. “So you know of my sword?”

“Hai, it was the reason I agreed to train you. Lord Kagewaki can be quite charming but I have better things to do than entertain a Lord’s request.”

“I see.” Avalon nods as she grabs her chopsticks and starts eating. ‘So she wants to train the Murasaki no Raikō Miko. What do you hope to gain, Nisshoku?’

“Have you had any training Lady Ava?”

“I haven’t.”

“Do you at least understand the concept of reiki?”

Avalon fixes Nisshoku with a deadly stare. “I’m untrained. Not stupid.”

Nisshoku purrs, “Forgive me.”

Avalon looks back at her food and continues to eat. Even with the pit in her stomach. Avalon suppresses the fear and appears call and collected.

Nisshoku looks at her new apprentice. “We will start after we eat.”

Avalon glances over at Nisshoku. “As you wish.”

Avalon and Nisshoku finish their meal in relative silence. Avalon gets up first and looks over at Nisshoku. “So how do we start?”

Nisshoku gets up as well and walks over to Avalon. “Follow me.”

Nisshoku leads Avalon down a hall to Nisshoku’s room, Avalon presumes. Nisshoku opens the shoji door, walking inside. Avalon follows looks around the room and sees things that make her skin crawl. Animal skulls, chicken feet, glowing vials and other odd things. ‘When did she get the time to bring all this stuff in here? Nisshoku is a dark miko, I’m sure of it.’

Nisshoku turns and sees Avalon looking around. “You seem curious.”

“Very.”

Nisshoku smiles wickedly. “You will learn all about this and more.” Nisshoku proceeds to explain what all the items are and what they are for to Avalon. Avalon listens with rapt attention. 

The day goes by and noon comes around when Getsumei knocks on the door. “Lady Ava, Lady Nisshoku, would you like some tea?”

Avalon looks over at Nisshoku who shrugs. “Up to you Lady Ava.”

“Hai, I think tea would be nice.”

Getsumei opens the door and brings the tray of tea in and looks around and feeling a chill. She decides to set the tray down inside the door. “Good day my Ladies.” She leaves, closing the door behind her.

Nisshoku smiles at Getsumei’s reaction. “Poor girl was frightened.”

Avalon purses her lips. “So it would seem.” ‘I’m not so sure this is a good idea to learn from her. But what choice do I have? I have to get stronger to escape Naraku.’

Nisshoku sits in front of the tray and grabs a cup, pouring tea, then handing it to Avalon. Avalon bends to reach the tea and nods her head in gratitude. Nisshoku pours her own cup. “Sit, we will continue once we finish the tea.”

Avalon grits her teeth but sits with Nisshoku. Avalon sips her tea while closely watching Nisshoku.

“You have something you wish to ask. I can’t read minds, Lady Ava.”

“You’re a dark miko?”

Nisshoku smiles and purrs out, “Of course. Does that bother you?”

“I am not sure yet.”

Nisshoku’s smile widens. “You are cautious. That will serve you well.”

Avalon simply nods her head. 

Nisshoku leans over “Tell me, when you acquired the sword, you had visions neh?”

Avalon nods her head.

“Tell me of them and I will help you explore them.”

Avalon takes a deep breath “There was a barrier and a powerful attack Sandasutoraiku.”

Nisshoku’s eyes light up “The sword itself can produce a barrier but your reiki will feed it and Sandasutoraiku is your own reiki using the sword as a conduit. I will teach you how to use the sword. Do not worry Lady Ava, you would be the most powerful Murasaki no Raikō Miko with my guiding hand.” ‘And my name will be synonymous with the Murasaki no Raikō Miko.’

They finish the tea and stand. Nisshoku starts telling Avalon about the items again and their purpose. The day passes when Getsumei knocks on the door again. “My Ladies, Lord Kagewaki requests Lady Ava’s presence for supper. Lady Nisshoku you are welcome as well. May I come in?”

Nisshoku answers, “Enter girl.”

Getsumei opens the door and gathers the tray and leaves closing the door behind her.

Avalon watches as the door closes. “I guess I should go.”

“Go on without me. I will join later. I have a few things to attend to.”

Avalon nods. ‘Thanks for leaving me to the wolf.’ She slides the shoji door open and closes it behind her. Avalon trudges down the hall, unhappy to be dining with Naraku. She steps through the door and sees Kagewaki sitting alone at the head of the table.

“Does your father not eat?”

“Oh, he takes his meals in his room. Perhaps I should do the same. What do you think, dear Ava?”

“Here is fine.” Avalon moves to sit away from him when he beckons her to sit by him. Avalon nods as she moves to sit where he showed her, knowing Kagewaki will be grabbing her. 

Kagewaki wraps his hand around her waist and pulls her into his lap. 

Avalon shows mild shock.

Kagewaki purrs, “Mmmm much better.” He brings his lips to hers giving her a gentle kiss. “I have missed you my dear.”

“I was only in another room.”

Kagewaki brushes his hand along her cheek. “But I could not see nor touch you.”

A servant brings out food for Avalon not quite sure where to place it, since she is in his lap he puts it next to Kagewaki’s food, bows and leaves. Kagewaki grabs her bowl of food and chopsticks. He scoops a portion up and presents it to Avalon’s lips. “Eat.” 

Avalon bites down on the offered food.

Kagewaki whispers into Avalon’s ear, “We will see if you beg tonight.” 

Meanwhile Jaken searches for Sesshomaru after waking and finding Avalon and the horse gone. Jaken was confused and concerned. He did not think Avalon would simply leave him behind. Plus, Sesshomaru was going to be so angry at him for not protecting her but Jaken had to tell him. After searching for a few days, he finally finds Sesshomaru sitting under a tree relaxing. Jaken exclaims. “Sesshomaru-sama!”

His eyes slide over, opening momentarily then close again, ignoring the green imp. 

Jaken throws himself on the ground in a low bow. “I am so sorry my Lord, I lost Avalon. She just disappeared. Please forgive me.”

‘Good riddance,’ he glowers at Jaken, ignoring him. He was happy to be rid of her, strange as she was. “Time will tell,” he says more to himself than to Jaken. 

“My Lord it is most strange, she was protective and taking care of me but then I woke and she was gone. I am loathe to admit it, but I am worried for her safety.”

“She can fend for herself,” he says dismissively. ‘If she is of use to anyone.’ 

“You will not look for her?” Jaken exclaims in disbelief 

He picks a rock up and throws it at Jaken’s head, hitting him between the eyes, then closing his eyes again as he rested. 

“Oh forgive me, I was out of line.” Jaken says defeated and slightly stunned before passing out.

The week passes with Avalon learning from Nisshoku. Nisshoku would help Avalon use the sword as a conduit for her reiki at first it was merely a fizzle but as the hours and days passed the size of the lightning would grow. The puppet Naraku would take her out to use the attack on youkai and would report back to his master. Avalon would practice gathering her energy and tightening the attack making it more effective and less chaotic when she had private moments. Kagewaki would teach her swordplay. And every night Avalon was forced to sleep in Kagewaki’s bed. Kagewaki was determined to make her beg for him to take her but she never did. 

Kagewaki began to suspect she was avoiding sex but he wanted to impregante her. If his research was correct her child would be able to wield Murasaki no Raikō and raising a child to love you is much easier than trying to control an adult. So that night he resolves to take Ava.

That night Avalon walks into the room in a yukata as Kagewaki waits in bed for her.

“Ava dear, so lovely.” He reaches his hand out to her. Avalon takes his hand and presses her body against his. ‘Your little trick is over tonight, my little vixen.’ 

Avalon kisses Kagewaki passionately. Kagewaki moves his hand to untie the strings holding the yukata on Avalon. He pushes the fabric off her shoulders as Avalon unties his yukata. She allows the garment to fall off her onto the futon then her hands move to Kagewaki’s chest and abdomen. ‘I must admit his body is attractive. Too bad he’s an evil motherfucker.’ 

Kagewaki breaks the kiss. “Ava, I want you on your back.” 

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Avalon nods her head and moves to lay on the bed. Kagewaki spreads her legs and brings his head down to her center. He slides his tongue along her folds and then he plunges his tongue into her and thrusts in and out as he sucks on her opening. 

‘God you’re a sick bastard.’ Avalon tries to relax and enjoy the sensation. This was her new life after all. She would do this for Hikari. She closes her eyes, and imagines it is Adrian Paul, who is pleasuring her. 

Kagewaki pulls back. “Will you beg Ava?”

Avalon scrunches her face up with that voice, her illusion is shattered. “Never.” 

Kagewaki hums and goes back to orally pleasuring her again. 

Avalon allows herself to be consumed by her illusion again. Kagewaki pulls away and quickly moves to her opening, sliding into her. 

Avalons eyes pop open as she feels him enter. Part of her feels like it dies. 

“I feel merciful tonight Ava. You are too stubborn to beg, so I will graciously allow you a release.”

Avalon quickly reins in her emotions to seem like she is pleased by his admission before nodding and smiling with half lidded eyes. She relaxes her body, knowing it will only cause her pain to fight it. Kagewaki starts to thrust in and out of her as she spreads her legs further to accommodate their new position. She clings to his body as she feels cold inside. She fakes an orgasim screaming Kagewaki’s name. 

Kagewaki pleased with himself, thrusting faster to get his own release. He cums inside Avalon coating her womb with his seed. 

Avalon kisses Kagewaki after he cums in her and continues to buck under his body with him inside her.

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

“Are you sated my dear?” Kagewaki thinks to himself, ‘Bear me a child, dear Ava, so I can kill you.’ 

“I will be fine, dear Kagewaki,” Avalon says in a seductive voice and grins. if only to give him an impression this pleases her.

He smiles and rolls both of them over keeping them joined, bringing Avalon on top of him. “Sleep my dear.”

“Hai Kagewaki.” Avalon says breathlessly, feeling so dead inside. She allows herself to fall asleep with them still connected.

She wakes and realizes she is still on top of Kagewaki, while he is still asleep. ‘I wish I had the power to kill you. Damn you Sesshomaru! If you only would have listened to me.’ 

Avalon rolls off of him and lays down on her side. ‘What can I do?’ Avalon slides off the futon. Looking over, Kagewaki is still asleep. ‘Good. Sleep.’ She slides the shoji screen to get in her room and goes straight to the tsukeshoin. 

Avalon grabs a scroll, ripping a piece from it. She quickly writes.  **光危険地獄** (Hikari danger Naraku) and rapidly dresses in a kimono and hakama. She shoves the piece of paper up her sleeve and walks back into Kagewaki’s room to find him still asleep. 

‘Typical male,’ Avalon thinks bitterly. She walks over to him, pulling her katana from her obi. She hovers the blade over his neck. ‘God I wish this would work.’ 

Kagewaki’s eye snap open when Avalon presses the blade into his neck as she moves to straddle his hips. 

“Morning, dear Kagewaki,” she says deeply.

“Ava, is this a new game?”

“No, this is a moment of honesty.” She leans down to whisper in his ear. “Naraku, I’m a killer. I have killed 2 men already. I wonder if I will kill you too.” Avalon moves to brush her lips over his as she slides the blade over his throat, cutting as she goes.

Kagewaki is angered by her boldness and the threat implied. He hears the blade drop on the floor as Avalon starts grinding her hips against him. “Would you deny a wanton woman Kagewaki?” He feels himself harden with each grind over his hips.

“What are you playing at?”

“You want me right?” her voice sounds desperate. “I’m giving you free reign to my body but don’t think I won’t be a pain.” Avalon leans down and starts kissing his neck where she cut him as it heals quickly, she laps at the blood. Kagewaki grabs her hair and pulls her face away from him. He notices her eyes are wild and blood covers her lips. He tosses her away by her hair.

Using a patranizing voice she says, “So, no morning sex then?” Avalon looks at him from across the room with a wicked grin on her face. 

Kagewaki sneers at her, “No.”

“I want to kill Kagewaki! Allow me to take your puppet and hunt some yokai.”

“Fine, just get out of here.”

Avalon nods as she gets up and grabs her sword before leaving the room. She goes to the dining area and sits. A servant rushes out and brings her food and stops when he sees the blood on her face.

“What are you staring at boy?” Avalon sneers

“Nothing...Forgive me.” The servant bows as he leaves her alone. Avalon quickly eats and then gets up, calling, “Naraku, Kagewaki wishes you to accompany me.”

Naraku appears behind her in his normal garb of a baboon pelt. Avalon turns and smirks. “What is it my Lady?”

“I need to train away from the castle.”

“Hai. Let us get the horses.”

“My thoughts exactly.”

Avalon follows Naraku outside to the stable, where Ten’un and another horse are saddled. She grabs her long bow and quiver of arrows.

“You plan on practicing archery?”

“I plan on hunting Naraku.” Avalon hops up on Ten’un and Naraku hops on his horse. They travel out, away from the castle. ‘Now all I have to do is destroy this puppet and I can send my message without eyes on me and get this nasty blood off my face.’ 

“What are we hunting Lady Ava?”

“Youkai!” 

They ride for a while, till they find some simple youkai. They are floating in the air. Their bodies snake like with humanlike heads in various colors Avalon hops off her horse. She calls forther Murasaki no Raikō and brings the blade down calling, “Sandāsutoraiku!” (Thunderstrike). 

A bolt of purple swirls about her sword getting larger and larger, until she slams the sword downwards unleashing the lightning. It comes out snaking in the air, instantly, incinerating the youkai in its path.

Avalon turns and smirks at Naraku. “So what do you think?” she asks, giddy, like a schoolgirl.

“Very good Ava. Kagewaki will be pleased.”

“I need more practice with my footing. Can you practice sword play with me?”

“Of course but don’t you usually do that with Kagewaki?”

“I do, but I want to use Murasaki no Raikō. And, I promised I wouldn’t use it with him,” she pouts.

“I see, very well.” Naraku dismounts his horse and comes to be in front of Avalon, presenting himself with his sword. Avalon smirks and calls, “Sandāsutoraiku!” Quickly swinging the blade down sending the snake like lightning out striking the puppet. It hollers in pain as the pelt and limbs dissolve in the holy power of her blade, finally disintegrating the entire body leaving nothing but dust and a wooden doll that falls to the ground where he once stood.

“Too easy.” She picks up the wooden doll, slipping it in her breast area. Avalon walks over to her horse and pulls an arrow from the quiver. She licks the blood on her lips before brushing the flight feathers with the blood. She then takes her normal sword and cuts her shoulder as if she was injured in a fight. She takes the flight feathers and coats them in her blood as well. She then takes the note from her sleeve and ties it to the shaft of the arrow. ‘I pray you find this Sesshomaru. I know you don’t give a damn about me, but I know you care for Hikari.’ 

Avalon notches the arrow and aims high to create an arch, as far from the castle as she can. She releases the arrow and releases a breath she didn’t realize she was holding.

Avalon sits to meditate, remembering what Kaede taught her. ‘Kaede was trying to bring my reiki out and she is a light miko, so let's see what I can do.’ 

After reaching a meditative state, she feels her reiki flowing like blood through her body. She concentrates on bringing it to the surface of her skin coating her body in it as a protective layer. She comes back to reality when she notices that it’s getting dark. Avalon gets up and mounts Ten’un, grabbing the reins of the other horse. Traveling back to the castle, she makes it back after the sun sets and the gates are closed.

“Open the gates!” Avalon calls and the gates open for her. The horses trot in, with the other horse being led by her. 

“Um Lady Ava, where is Naraku?”

“Oh he had other business to tend to I’m sure he will return soon.”

“Very well.”

She quickly makes her way to the stables and hands the horses off to the stable hand. 

“Take good care of them.”

“Of course my Lady.” The stable hand bows respectfully taking the reins in hand.

Avalon turns and walks to the castle in search of Kagewaki. She finds him in the dining area. His face quickly contorts in displeasure seeing her. 

Avalon grins as she walks in, sitting right beside him. “Kagewaki,” Avalon chirps brightly.

“Lady Ava,” Kagewaki answers flatly.

A servant moves out and places food in front of Avalon, bows and retreats.

“I have something for you, I found it today.” Avalon reaches into her breast area retrieving the wood doll and hands it to him.

Kagewaki takes it and nearly crushes it.

“So what did you do Ava?”

Avalon smirks, “Not much, just some training.”

“Naraku will be back Ava.” Kagewaki glares at Avalon.

Avalon nods sipping at her tea, “Oh I know.”

“I will enjoy tonight.” Kagewaki smiles wickedly.

Avalon keeps a neutral face and eats her food, ignoring his innuendo. Once she is done eating, Kagewaki grabs her elbow, dragging her towards his room.

“This is unnecessary.” Avalon exclaims at the indignation of being dragged to his bedchamber.

“ _ Oh I know _ ,” he mocks her earlier words. Kagewaki slides the shoji door, shoving her in the room. “Remove your clothes Ava.” He steps in and closes the door.

Avalon begins to take off her clothing, letting them slide off her body.

“Still breathtaking.” Kagewaki walks over and runs his hand over her shoulder blades. “So silky smooth.” He slides his fingers along her abdomen, fingering the muscles under her delicate skin. “So strong.” He presses his hard erection against her back as his head rests on her shoulder. “I wonder what it will take to break you?”

Avalon’s heart pounds in her chest. Her fear rises with each move and word he speaks.

“Get in the bed Ava.”

Avalon gulps and walks to the futon and lays on her back. Kagewaki strips his clothing off stalking to Avalon. 

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He grabs her shoulders, pressing her into the futon and forcing her legs apart with his knees. He chuckles darkly as he forces himself between her legs.

**xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Avalon screws her eyes shut and tries to relax her body for the assault she knows is coming. Tears stream down her face as she knows it will happen again and again and again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo, we love both : )


	16. Training

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *****Trigger Warning on this Chapter*****
> 
> Something happens that makes Kagewaki fear Avalon.

**WARNING CHAPTER CONTAINS RAPE (xxxxxxx) shows where it starts and ends.**

Avalon wakes in the morning laying on her side. She feels Kagewaki’s arm around her and his body pressed against her back, spooning her.

He wakes at the change of her breathing, sliding weathered fingers down her shoulder, rubbing her stomach. “Did you enjoy last night?” he purrs in her ears. 

Avalon remains silent as tears fall from her eyes. 

“What dear Ava?” He licks the tears off her cheeks, sliding his bristled tongue up her cheek to drink her tears. “Do you want it again?” His fingers slide down to the apex of her womanhood. 

Her lip quivers. “No...please...no,” she finally chokes out 

The hand retreats and comes up to cup her breast as he croons in her ear, “If you ever do what you did yesterday again,” the nails dig into the skin of her breast, until the supple skin leaks crimson, “I will make it hurt.” The fingers slacken and then caress as if asking forgiveness, “but if you behave and comply. You will enjoy it. Do you understand?” 

“I... I do.” 

“Do you want me to heal this?” he asks Avalon, circling the cuts on her breast with his finger. 

“I’ll be fine. You needn’t worry.” 

He smirks devilishly. “I thought we agreed you would be compliant?” He shoves her shoulders down against the futon, straddling her waist. “Do you want me to heal you?” 

“If it is what you wish to do.” 

“Say it,” he hisses out, gripping her side threateningly, already aroused. 

She closes her eyes saying, “Please heal me?” 

He leans over her chest scraping his mouth around the battered breast, forcing his erection into her stomach as he does. “From now on, you will pine for me,” he licks the side of her neck, “crave me,” his nose washes over her lips. “Do you understand?” 

“Hai, I understand.” Tears keep pouring from her eyes as her body shakes under him. 

“Tell me you want me?” He breathes in the scent of her neck, flicking her collarbone with his tongue. 

Her voice shakes, “I want you.” 

“Good girl,” he whispers in her ear, sliding off her. “Compliant Ava...you wouldn’t want me to bring Hikari here would you? She’s gotten taller you know. She learns herbs with Kaede in the afternoon and sparring in the morning with some of the local village men.” 

“I already promised what you wanted. I’ll beg for your body, but leave her out of this.” Her breathing escalates and her voice is desperate. 

“I want more than a body Ava. I said an ally. I want your mind, your soul, all of you.” He rises, clothing himself. “If you defy me again, I will bring her here and let you watch. I think you’d enjoy that.” He ties his obi and turns around. “Now get dressed and stop crying. Or perhaps you need something more to cry about?” He stalks to her threateningly, a bulge still prominent in the front of his pants. 

“I don’t want anything to cry about Kagewaki but if you want, I am only too happy to please you this morning.” Avalon closes her eyes, holding back more tears as she feels sick with herself offering him what she thinks he wants. 

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He takes her by the hand, lifting her off the futon then slams her face first against the wall, kicking her legs wider. Reaching one hand down her waist between her folds, he finds her center of pleasure and begins circling it. “Beg Ava...tell me you need me to fill you.” 

“Oh please, Kagewaki I need you to fill me!” She feels sick to her stomach. 

He unties his pants and forces himself inside of her. “You will learn to love this Ava.” 

“Yes Kagewaki,” she says in a soft voice, her head leans against the wall as she holds her tears back. Kagewaki finishes with her and pulls himself from her to dress. 

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“Get dressed.”

“Hai.” Avalon walks to her room as Kagewaki follows her. She grabs a new kimono and juban putting them on. Kagewaki escorts Avalon to the dining area. They enter and sit together as a servant puts food down for both of them. 

“Are you excited to train today Ava?” Kagewaki pours her tea from an ornate glass kettle, with sakura leaves flying in the wind painted on it. 

Avalon looks up from the food sitting in front of her feeling hopeless. She speaks just above a whisper, “Yeah.” 

“I’m sure you are learning much from Nisshoku.” He picks up a ball of rice and begins chewing it. 

“She is adequate in her training abilities,” Avalon answers a little more surely. “Would you like to see some of the things I have learned Kagewaki?” 

“I would enjoy seeing what you have learned.” 

Avalon lifts her right hand palm up offering it to Kagewaki, seeing if he might take the bait. 

He takes her hand, thumbing her knuckles. 

Avalon grabs his hand holding it firmly. She allows her reiki to pour down her shoulder coating it in purple light. It spills down like smoke slowly moving towards their joined hands. “What do you think so far dear Kagewaki?” 

He grins proudly separating before the light can come down to his hand and burn him. “I think today I’d like to see you put it to use.” He snaps his fingers high in the air and his servants bring in three kuwaso children. “Show me, on them,” he points at the crying brown otter children. 

Avalon raises her eyebrow, “Oh weak youkai? Pathetic.” Avalon stands and walks over to the three children. She lets her reiki rise to her hands. ‘Kami forgive me.’ She places her hand on the largest of the otter children letting it burn at the child’s skin. The child screams in agony. She lifts her hand showing the raging red burn marks. She feigns exhaustion. “I think I may have used too much.” She walks on shaky legs back to be by Kagewaki. 

“Too bad,” he stands up with his own sword drawn. “I think it would have been kinder.” He hacks into them, slicing their stomachs, sending the contents spilling on the wooden floors. “Don’t you think?” He wipes the blade on a napkin. 

Avalon shivers inside at his cruelness but keeps a neutral mask. “I’m not certain. Being burned alive or quickly slit in half.”

Nisshoku enters and stops seeing the mess, “What has happened?” she hisses. 

“Dear Ava got tired purifying these ones. There are more in the prison, perhaps you can teach her to not use up her energy so quickly on their parents.” 

“Lord Kagewaki, I have not taught her to purify anything.” Nisshoku looks questioningly over at her student.

Avalon shrugs nonchalantly. 

“Then you can start with something small, perhaps the nursing baby,” he says as he drinks from a wooden cup. 

Avalon leans over to whisper in his ear, “Why are you keeping babies and children youkai. You can’t possibly absorb them for power, so why?” She sits back 

“I think you still haven’t learned your lesson, Ava,” he says firmly, bearing his teeth at her. “Nisshoku, do you have a problem with this?” 

“Kagewaki I want to be an ally, I am only curious.”

Nisshoku shrugs. She didn’t care one way or the other. 

“Or, are you trying to stall? See what good it did you?” He raises chopsticks full of fish at the dead bodies in front of them. “Shall I have more of this kind brought in? There were more children where Naraku hunted.” 

“I wasn’t stalling. I was only curious, it seems odd.” She shrugs. “But I am at your command Kagewaki.” She bows her head submissively. 

“Wonderful. Then Nisshoku, please go with the servants to the prison. I’m sure Ava will perform dutifully. Won’t you Ava?” He tilts his head in her direction, running his hand up the inside of her thigh then squeezing it. “Because you know what will happen if you don’t.” 

“I would happily comply but my reiki is not replenished perhaps we should spar then afterward Nisshoku could help me master my reiki better.”

“Lord Kagewaki, Lady Ava, purification is not something I know how to teach, I’m afraid.” 

“Mmh,” he becomes pensive. “Then you will both have something to practice,” the hand rides higher up on Avalon’s hip, digging his fingers in, before he whispers in her ear. “Or you will scream for me.” 

“I understand my Lord, please excuse me.” Nisshoku leaves the table

“Kagewaki, I will scream your name if you wish, every night if you wish. I am yours.” 

“Good then you may train,” he releases his hold on her. “Shame,” he glances at the dead children, eyes slightly tinted red. 

“Did you wish to spar with me?” 

“I would love to,” Kagewaki smiles at her as they finish eating. 

Kagewaki and Avalon make their way to the courtyard. Avalon draws her katana and Kagewaki pulls his from his obi. Avalon and Kagewaki charge at each other. The swords meet with a ringing clash. He slices at her neck. Avalon brings her blade up stopping his, forcing her way through. She pushes past him, swinging the sword back and spins to meet his next blow. 

He parries to slice into her hip, thrusting downwards. She jumps back, then steps forward again, aiming her blade to slit him horizontally along his abdomen as he had done to the otter children back in the other room. He laughs and brings his blade vertical, wrist high to block it, then punches her in the head sending her to the ground, only to force his foot down on her neck and point his blade at her eyes. “Rage does little in battle but distract Ava.” He steps off her allowing her up. 

“Rage, what rage?” She huffs, getting up, setting her stance again. She stalks towards him with her blade out swinging it upwards to cut his head off. 

He parries against it, holding his katana vertically, then spins aiming for her stomach. Avalon brings her sword down holding it horizontally, before rotating it around his blade, while flicking her wrist and aiming to cut the hand holding the sword. She hits her mark and backs off before he can take aim at her.

He elbows her in the nose sending her flying onto the ground with blood coming from her nostrils. “Never back down Ava. I thought you said you’ve killed.” 

“You’re different. I wouldn’t want to displease you.” She wipes the blood from her nose, holding her blade at the ready. 

“Weakness is displeasing.” He attacks again swinging the sword over his head at her middle. She moves her sword to block him, while rolling her body along the outside of the attack getting behind him, before she kicks him in his back sending him sprawling on to the ground. She brings her blade down to the back of his neck stopping short of beheading him. 

He swings his foot out sideways, knocking her onto her back, then leaps on top of her straddling her hips, and clamps one hand down on her neck. “Better...show me you can save yourself, Ava,” he puts enough pressure on her neck to slow her breathing. 

Avalon lifts her sword to his neck having never let the blade go. She knows they are being watched by the men of the castle. “Yield,” she hisses. 

He grins proudly. “You’re finally learning. No mercy,” he leans over her cupping a breast. “Do you ever wonder what would have happened if you had fought back when I came?” He licks her earlobe. “Perhaps you could have overpowered me. I guess we’ll never know, will we?” He rises off her sheathing his sword. 

Avalon gets up sheathing her sword. “Murasaki no Raikō.” The blade appears in her hand. “Shall we continue Kagewaki?” 

“Are you so hungry for more?” 

“You have no idea,” Avalon says flatly 

Kagewaki calls out, “Ava my dear, I have other things I must do. You may train with Naraku or Nisshoku. Whomever you wish for today.”

Avalon huffs and lets her blade fade away. “I’ll seek out Nisshoku.” 

But she doesn’t go to Nisshoku. She seeks out the dungeon. She follows the hall and heads down the stairs. ‘So he wants me to purify innocents?’ She looks at the various demons in their prisons. Some look humanoid with animal features while others look monstrous. ‘None are a perfect youkai like Sesshomaru. Good.’

“Murasaki no Raikō,” Avalon calls. Her sword materializes in her hand. “Sandasutoraiku!” Purple light swirls around her blade as she stabs it into the ground. “LISTEN WELL, ALL OF YOU!” The power swirls, growing around her blade as she pours more of her own power into the blade. The youkai perk up with her words and the building of reiki in the air. “WHEN I UNLEASH THIS ATTACK, THE WALLS WILL BE DESTROYED. RUN AS FAST AND AS FAR AS YOU CAN. DO NOT LOOK BACK! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?” She hears various agreements and grunts.

“SANDASUTORAIKU!!!” The ground shakes. As the attack unleashes, the walls start to crumble around the dungeon. The purple lightning strikes and snakes along the ground. Her reiki seeks out impure auras...killers, while the children and adults who did not harm others are left unharmed. The adults flee with the children as holes poke through the walls to the outside and they escape while more of the evil demon’s are slaughtered and her reiki lashes through the air in seemingly random directions. She turns, feeling Naraku’s aura approaching quickly.

Kagewaki senses a firestorm of reiki coming from the dungeons. He leaves his room, and follows it to the dungeon in time to see Ava covered in her own blood. The air smells clean and pure. He smiles wickedly. ‘She’s more brutal than I thought she was.’ 

Avalon falls face down in the dirt. Her chest rises and falls but she is unmoving as Kagewaki approaches her. 

He approaches her carefully, kneeling down and rolling her body over. She flops weakly and silently. ‘Did you over do it Ava?’ He leans over her sensually listening by her mouth. Her breathing is steady as if she is only asleep. 

‘We will practice this new gift you have shown me.’ He lifts her off the dirt and carries her into the castle, down the hallways until he finds Getsumei. “Follow me,” he orders her. 

The maid follows Kagewaki watching as he carries a limp Ava. “Is she dead my Lord?” 

“No,” he says breathing heavily, taking her into the washroom. “Only unconscious. Wash her and then leave her in my bed.” He sets her down on the floor of the washroom grinning. 

“Hai, my Lord.” Getsumei strips Avalon of her clothing. She washes the blood from her face and the dirt from her body. “What did you do my Lady?” she shakes her head. After cleaning her Getsumei puts her in a simple yukata. “Now how am I to get her in the Lord's bed?” 

She leaves Ava on the floor and steps into Kagewaki’s room. He is sitting at his desk. “My Lord, she is washed and dressed but I cannot lift her into your bed. My apologies.” She bows low on the ground hoping he will not punish her. 

He licks his lips hungrily, only slightly frustrated with the maid. “Bring her food and drink.” He rises from the desk and goes to the washroom, lifting Ava off the floor and brings her to his room. He sets her on his futon and straddles her hips while she sleeps. “What did you do?” He traces a line from her neck, down to her chest. “What new trick have you shown me?” 

Getsumei leaves the room and goes to get Ava food and drink. Avalon still sleeps under his ministrations. Getsumei soon returns with food and drink for her Lady. “Here my Lord.” She sets the tray down and leaves the room. 

He leans over Avalon, licking the skin of her neck and smiling. “We’re going to have fun with this aren’t we?” 

Avalon finally stirs, groggy and confused. “Hmmm.” Her eyes blink a few times trying to focus. 

Kagewake caresses her cheek gently, to ease her waking. “Dear Ava,” he slides off her lap. “What happened?” 

“Kagewaki?” She blinks, finally focusing on his face and smirks before closing her eyes again. “I just did what you asked.” 

“My dark Miko,” he sidles up next to her. “Did you enjoy killing?” 

Avalon closes her eyes. “It was interesting.” 

“Are you hungry?” He points at the tray of food, “thirsty?” 

“I’m starving but I am so tired.” Avalon relaxes into the futon. The energy she expelled was way too much. She pushed herself too far. 

“Then eat,” he purrs in her ear, “and I will help you rest.” 

Avalon tries to rise up but only gets up a few inches off the futon before falling back onto it. “I think I will just sleep.” 

Kagewaki removes his hankimono and hanjuban and lays down next to her. “Then I will join you.” 

Avalon sighs. “Do as you please.” Her eyes are already too heavy and her consciousness slips away. Within seconds, she is out cold again. 

“Sleep Ava, sleep.” His eyes darken, excited to see this change of heart. She will be his dark miko.

Once her eyes are closed he rises from her side pacing back and forth, deep in thought. If Ava wanted to...she could kill him and he knows it. The strike she sent was powerful enough to destroy the dungeon and the many demons within it, meaning if she wanted to fight against him, she could. He needs the Shikon no Tama to cement his power before that happens. He stops and then begins to grin. ‘But would she put Hikari at risk?’ He knows she wouldn’t, the child Hikari is Ava’s weakness and she would do  _ anything  _ to keep her safe. With that thought, he stretches out next to Ava again, falling asleep. 

The next morning Avalon wakes feeling more refreshed but famished. She goes to sit up feeling Kagewaki’s arm around her waist. She thinks back to the previous day. She had decimated the dungeon destroying the walls. Her reiki sought out auras that were impure, while leaving those that were pure alone. The innocent escaped in the chaos she created. She remembers seeing Kagewaki before she passed out. He looked so pleased, making her smile. ‘You have no idea that I let the innocent escape do you?’ She shifts to be out of his grasp.

Kagewaki feels Avalon moving next to him and wakes up. He rises off the futon. “Ava,” he says sweetly. “Are you rested?” 

Avalon sighs, “Yes I am feeling much better but I’m starving.” 

Kagewaki goes to the door and waves his hand at one of the servants. “Bring food and water, and Kurayami.” He sits down by his desk and says, “Food will be served shortly.” 

Avalon nods as she stretches her back. She is surprised he had not taken her during the night but she isn’t going to complain. She slides off the futon walking over to his desk. She leans over his shoulders resting her front on his back. “What are you working on?” 

“A letter,” he says slyly as the shoji doors slide open and the servant with the food arrives with a samurai behind her. “This is Kurayami, Ava.” He turns to the side to see her face. “He is a mercenary, under my direction.” He hands Kurayami the letter. “Read it.”

Avalon thinks, ‘Kurayami means darkness.’

The samurai opens the scroll. “We are to destroy the village where the Miko Kaede resides and kill a child named, Hikari if the castle falls.” He folds the letter, sliding it into the material of his hankimono. “It will be done Kagewaki-sama,” he bows.

“So obedient,” Kagewaki exhales satisfied and turns to Ava. “What do you think Ava? You can leave Kurayami.” 

Avalon’s eyes burn into his. Her reiki swirls along her skin stinging at Naraku but not causing actual harm. “What is the meaning of this? I have done nothing but what you ask of me.” 

He grabs her by the wrist and flings her onto her back, towering over her. “For that sting alone, I should send him to find her. What do you think he would do with that girl? His men?” He slides a knife out from his wrist and holds it at her throat. “Drop the reiki Ava,” he digs the tip into the side of her neck. “I would hate to kill you.” 

“It’s not always under my control dear Lord. But I will try.” Avalon closes her eyes trying to calm down. She is too drained and would not be anywhere near strong enough to take him out right now. She breathes deeply, feeling the blade against her neck ignoring the sting as it pushes into her flesh. After a few moments the reiki subsides. Her eyes fly open still seething with anger. “You know if she dies, you have nothing to hold over me?” 

“I think it’s time to test your obedience,” Kagewaki says malevolently. He pulls open her kimono and slides the knife in enough to break her skin but not cause any real damage. “Don’t scream.” He slides it snake like down her collar bone, between her breasts going from side to side and along her stomach. 

Avalon smirks internally. She wouldn’t scream no matter what he put her body through. She breathes heavily, staying still and not making a sound as he cuts her. 

He finishes stopping just above her curls. “I think I’m going to leave this as a reminder, Ava...you will always belong to me.” He stands turning away from her. “Eat and then go train.” 

“Yes dear Kagewaki.” she says flatly. She rises up pulling the kimono closed while moving to the food to eat. She was so hungry. 

He goes to the door, uninterested in their game this morning. “Who do you belong to Ava?” 

“You, Kagewaki,” she says, her voice dripping with sarcasm. 

“Don’t ever forget it. If you do...it is she who will pay. You can’t be in two places at once. Just remember that.” He leaves to let her eat, knowing the cut will scar. 

The rest of the month passes with Avalon waking to train with Nisshoku on her miko abilities or her sword skills with Kagewaki or mastering her Murasaki no Raikō using Sandasutoraiku. Avalon wanted to strike the puppet down but she didn’t want to anger Naraku further. Every night he forced her to his bed. He would insist she beg for him to take her and she would comply. When he asked her to scream his name, she would. All to keep Hikari safe even as Naraki ate away at her soul every day degrading her and manipulating her further.

Avalon wakes one morning in Kagemakie’s futon with a start. Her stomach lurches forward and she claps her hand over her mouth. She springs up from the bed bolting for the bathing area and pushes the shoji screen open to the outside before violently expelling her stomach content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo thank you for reading our story!


	17. Kagewaki’s Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A fever overtakes Avalon and admissions endanger Sesshomaru's life.

Kagewaki watches as Avalon flees the bed running to the bathing area. He hears the screen open to the outside and the retching noise she is making. He smiles wickedly. ‘Has she conceived!?’ He can feel his plan’s coming to fruition. As soon as the child is born he can kill her and be done with the stubborn woman.

Avalon soon returns, still having an uneasy stomach. She lays back down on the futon. Her body is so tired and it aches everywhere. She is sure she has the flu or something.

“You don’t feel well Ava?” Kagewaki leans over her shoulder, rubbing her stomach in circles. 

“No, not really.” She lays on her back, wondering why he is rubbing her stomach. 

He rests on his side next to her gazing longingly at her belly. Perhaps his scheming has finally paid off. “Women’s issues?” 

“Um, women issues?” She asks confused as she bolts up out of the bed running to the outside again to eject whatever was left within her gut. 

The action makes Kagewaki glitter with glee. ‘Good girl, Ava.’ He stands up following her outside. He finds her kneeling over by the roots of a tree retching and rubs her back lovingly. 

Avalon finally stops and rubs her mouth completely perplexed. ‘Why in the hell is he being so sweet to me? What does he want?’ She pushes past him, heading back to the castle and to the room to rest. ‘Shit I’m really sick.’ She lays down again. Laying on her stomach and closes her eyes 

Kagewaki comes in several moments later with a tray of ginger tea and rice, setting them down in front of Ava. “What’s wrong?” he simpers in her ear. “Would you like tea?” 

Avalon smells the ginger and knows it might help settle her stomach. “I’m not sure what’s wrong but I’m really nauseous and tired. I think the tea might help.” She sits up and turns around to grab the cup of tea off the tray, taking small sips. 

Kagewaki caresses her cheek with the back of his fingers. “My poor Ava, should I send for a healer?” 

“I’m sure it will pass. I’m fine.” Ava says between little sips. “I just need to rest and eat simple things and drink some tea.” 

He wraps his arms around her waist from the back, moving her hair over her shoulder to expose the back of her neck, then begins opening his mouth against it. “Rest,” he purrs at her. ‘Grow my child.’ 

Avalon nods her head. “I will, once I eat some rice and finish this tea. I just hope I don’t vomit again.” 

“No training today,” he says pompously, getting up and heading for the door. “Just rest.” 

“Hai, Kagewaki.” Avalon rolls her eyes. She wasn’t planning on training anyway. She eats some rice and finishes her tea. She then lays on her side, letting sleep take her. 

That afternoon she wakes covered in sweat and rushes outside to purge herself again. Her head is pounding and she feels dizzy. She makes it back to the futon in a daze. She says to no one in particular, “I think I need the healer now,” before passing out involuntarily. 

Kagewaki returns to find Avalon still in bed. He kneels on one knee next to her, touching her forehead. Her cheeks are red, her skin is boiling and her clothes are soaked through. “Dammit,” he fumes, shaking her. “Ava?” He shakes her again but she doesn’t wake. “Ava?” he says, more concerned. He runs out of the room to find one of the servants. “Send for a healer.” ‘I will not allow you to die...yet.’ 

Avalon wakes up in her bed. She looks at the alarm clock next to her. It’s 9:00 AM. “Dammit, I’m going to be late!” Avalon jumps out of her bed rushing to the bathroom. She takes a quick shower and washes her hair. She wraps a big fluffy green towel around her head and a big fluffy blue one around her body. She stands in front of the mirror above the sink as she pulls out her tooth brush from it’s holder and puts toothpaste on it and brushes her teeth. She spits out the tooth paste and rinses her mouth out with the sink water. “Much better.”

She leaves the bathroom to go back to her room grabbing a plain, black women’s suit from the closet. She pulls a white under shirt from the closet as well, setting them on the bed. She goes to her dresser and pulls her undergarments out and panty hose and dresses quickly. 

She brushes her hair putting it in a low ponytail and heads for the door. She stops to admire her life size poster of Sesshomaru. “Ah my love, my dear Sesshomaru.” She caresses the stripes on the cheek. “I will see you later.” She kisses his lips and opens the door, then closes and locks it behind her. 

She walks to her garage and opens the door, going to her black 98 Ford Crown Victoria. She opens the door, hopping in and starts the car to drive to the hospital. 

She puts on the radio and sings along to Disturbed Indestructible. 

_ “♪Indestructible _

_ Determination that is incorruptible _

_ From the other side _

_ A terror to behold _

_ Annihilation will be unavoidable _

_ Every broken enemy will know _

_ That their opponent had to be invincible _

_ Take a last look around while you're alive _

_ I'm an indestructible master of war♫” _

Avalon parks her car as she gets to the hospital and goes to the front desk, getting her ID card. “Thank you Erica.” She pins the pass to her breast pocket and heads for the stairs, climbing up to the second floor. She heads over to the nursing station. “Hey Amy, do you know where Dr. Whimble is?”

“Oh, he is already with a patient in room 227. You need to get there.”

“Shoot! See you!” Avalon rushes down the hall to room 227 walking in. “Dr Whimble,” she greets him.

“Ah, Avalon! I’m so glad you are here. Mrs. Kanaki is really in need of your translating skills.”

Avalon smiles. “That’s why I’m here.”

“Alright, can you explain that she tore her left rotator cuff and she will need surgery to repair it.”

“Of course.”

Avalon says in Japanese, “Mrs. Kanaki, I am Avalon. Dr Whimble has checked on you and your left rotator cuff is torn. He will need to perform surgery to repair it.”

Mrs. Kanaki face falls and asks, “Is there no other option?”

Avalon switches to english, “She wants to know if there are any other options.”

Dr. Whimble sighs. “Not really. We can try rest and then physical therapy but I honestly think surgery is the best option.”

Avalon switches to Japanese, “Dr. Whimble believes surgery would be the best option but we could try rest and then physical therapy.” 

Mrs. Kanaki looks at the doctor and considers. “I will go with surgery, if he is sure it is the best option.”

Avalon smiles, “Dr. Whimble is excellent and he knows what he is doing, don’t worry.”

Mrs. Kanaki nods her head.

Avalon switches to English. “She chose surgery.”

Dr. Whimble breathes a sigh of relief. He didn’t want her to suffer more than necessary. “Good” The doctor goes on to explain what is going to happen and Avalon translates between them. 

After the consultation is over, Avalon returns the ID card to Erica and leaves the hospital to drive home.

Avalon suddenly wakes in bed gasping. “Where am I?” she says in English. She sees a female leaning over her patting, her head with a damp cool cloth. 

“You are okay dear. You are just very sick. I had to change your clothing. It was soaked through.”

Avalon nods still disoriented. She was just arriving home and now she is here. Avalon studies the woman. She is wearing a simple pink kimono with a purple obi. She wears an odd necklace that looks to be made of teeth. Her face is that of an older woman perhaps in her 40’s but her hair is pitch black and her eyes are dull brown with pale skin.

“I am not sure what ails you, but I will leave you with a tea especially for your symptoms.”

“What’s in it?” Avalon asks, genuinely curious.

“Hmm natsushirogiku and ginger,” she says wisely.

Kagiwaki sits at his desk watching and listening intently to everything.

Avalon nods. She knows they would do well for her fever and her upset stomach. “How long have I been out?” 

Kagewake speaks from the corner of the room, “One day. You had me scared Ava.” 

Avalon is shocked. “A day!?” 

“Do you feel better?” 

“I feel really tired and I don't feel right,” she says dazed. 

“I will inform Nisshoku that you will need another day before training resumes.” 

“Hai, Kagewaki,” Avalon says glumly. ‘If I’m not training, he hovers around me.’ 

The healer speaks, “Here, drink this.” She hands Avalon the cup of tea.

Avalon nods and drinks the cup of tea. “Arigato”

The healer nods. “I have done what I can. I will retire to my guest room. If I am needed, please call.” The healer bows and exits the room, leaving Avalon and Kagewaki alone. 

Kagewaki stops the healer outside the door. “Is she with child?” 

“If she is, it is too soon to tell, my Lord.” 

He clenches his fist by the door. ‘Evil wench, making me think you are pregnant with my child.’ He returns to the room and sits at his desk. 

Avalon lays down closing her eyes. She feels so discombobulated, still unsure if this is a dream or if her other life is the dream. She breathes shallowly as she tries to sort out her mind and get back to what's real. Avalon falls into a peaceful, dreamless sleep. 

Kagewaki starts writing, thinking about what he heard while she spoke in her sleep and a name, Sesshomaru and then a string of words he understood about something that sounded like she may have been a healer in her past life. He rises off the floor, deciding to take advantage of her feverish state and shakes her shoulders to wake her. “Ava,” he calls to her sweetly. “Ava, wake up.” 

Avalon stirs when she is shaken, she mumbles, her eyes still closed. “Kagewaki?” 

“Where were you Ava?” he asks her. 

She moans delicately, “Mmmm home...,” she trails off 

“Where is home?” 

“127 w 5th avenue, Crestwood Illinois, 60472,” she answers mechanically. 

“Irrinois?” he tries to repeat the word, then realizes with glee that she is finally answering somewhat truthfully. “What did you do at home Ava?” 

“I’m a freelance translator,” she says without thinking. 

“Translator?” he tastes the word in his mouth, but that isn’t what interested him. She spoke affectionately about one called, ‘Sesshomaru’. Her tone was tender when she said the name. “Who is Sesshomaru?” 

“My Lord.” She smiles thinking of him. 

“Your Lord?” he asks incredulously. “What makes him your Lord?” 

“I would follow him to the ends of the Earth.” 

“Why Ava?” 

Avalon doesn’t answer, she just hums happily as she starts to get aroused. 

“Who is he, Ava? A suitor?” 

Avalon shakes her head. “Nooooo,” she trails off and starts crying. 

“Oh dear Ava.” He kisses her brow. “What did this demon do to you?” 

“He’s so mean to me,” she pouts. 

“What does he do?” He’s enjoying this game. 

“He abandons me.” Her lip trembles. 

“Why did he abandon you?” he scoffs, Ava is too valuable to be left in the shadows. 

“He never believes me,” she laments dismally.

“What did you tell him?” 

Avalon sits up and turns, wrapping her arms around him and leaning her head on his shoulder. “Just the same things I told you. You believe me right?” she asks hopefully.

“Of course I believe you, what kind of monster wouldn’t?” He returns her embrace. 

Avalon crawls up onto his lap. She feels lascivious and she wants release and her mind muddled. The fever has taken reality and stripped it away from her. “That’s why I like you.” 

He grabs her ass, massaging it. “Tell me more about this Sesshomaru.” He’s heard rumors off and on about the name and wants to know more. 

Avalon lifts her head, rocking her hips into his crotch. “I don’t want to talk about him.” She osculates her lips to Kagewaki’s. 

He returns the kiss, intrigued by her brazen behavior. “Tell me and I will satisfy you.” 

Avalon whines. “Must I?” She reaches her hand down his hakama grabbing his cock and strokes it. 

He groans at the contact, removing her hand. “Tell me.” 

Avalon pouts. “Fine! He’s a youkai with great power and beautiful.” She grinds her hips into his crotch as she speaks. “He is stubborn and arrogant.” 

“Where would one find such a stubborn and arrogant demon? To teach him a lesson of the value of dear Ava?” He starts responding to her need. 

“Asano Castle,” she says without thinking, only feeling his cock bulging beneath his hakama. She rocks her hips, feeling the way the contact relieves some of her need. 

“When,” he unties his pants, willing to give her what she wants. 

“Hmmm, I’m not sure. Soon after the jewel returns to this world.” 

“Good girl,” he hisses in her ear and slides himself within her. ‘Good girl.’ Avalon's eyes fall shut as Kagewaki slides deep into her folds. Avalon rocks her hips against him, feeling the relief of him inside her. She moans and pants her delight as the pleasure builds within her belly. She comes to her precipice crashing over she screaming with ecstasy "Sesshomau-sama!"

Kagewaki’s teeth clench angrily and he pushes her off of him. ‘He must be powerful this one you are so in love with.’ 

Avalon looks up dazed and her eyes move to Kagewaki. “Huh? What happened?” 

Kagewaki stands and wipes himself. “A full blooded youkai would never love something as impure as you,” he says, cruelly. “You are mine to enjoy.” He laughs wickedly. 

Avalon stares confused at him “Full blooded youkai?” 

‘You have no idea what you have done, do you? My little vixen?” He leaves the room equally annoyed and satisfied. Sesshomaru will become his prey. 

Avalon starts to feel faint and lets sleep take her.That night she sleeps completely unaware of what she has done and what has transpired. 

Kagewaki slips in the room pulling his hakama off and sliding in bed with Avalon wrapping his arms around her. ‘You will know who had you last night.’ He watches Avalon sleep in his arms, considering what he will do with the information she has given him. ‘I doubt she will remember any of it?’ He smiles wickedly down at her peaceful sleeping face and then falls asleep plotting his next move.

Avalon wakes in the morning feeling somewhat better. Kagewaki lays beside her with a smile on his face in his sleep. ‘Why is he so happy?’ 

Kagewaki wakes when Avalon starts moving around. “Morning dear Ava. How are you feeling?”

“Better but not completely well,” she replies cautiously.

Kagewaki nods his head. “Should I have food brought to the room?”

“That would be good.” 

Kagewaki gets up and picks his hakama off the floor, pulling them on and tying them. 

‘So he raped me last night again.’ Avalon’s face falls

Kagewaki walks to his door, calling a servant to have rice and Ava’s tea brought to his room.

Avalon gets out of bed and walks out to use the bathroom. She comes back and the tray is already in the room. She picks up the rice and eats and then drinks her tea. “I think I shall just rest for today.”

“Very well,” Kagewaki says as he walks to his desk to work on some papers.

Avalon soon falls back asleep. The next day she wakes feeling normal. So she goes to train with Nisshoku, while Kagewaki observes from the shadows. But as time passes, her power and skills grow stronger. Naraku’s fears that the threat of harming Hikari will not be enough to contain Ava. So one night after he forces her to his bed and she falls asleep, he slips out to speak to Nisshoku.

“Nisshoku.”

Nisshoku wakes in her bed surprised the Lord has come to visit her. “My Lord, have you come to visit my bed?” she purrs.

Internally he sneers but he keeps a calm face and voice. “No I need your help with Lady Ava.”

“My Lord, she is progressing nicely. I’m not sure there is much more I can teach her. I am sorry if that is inadequate.”

“No, I am more concerned with her defiance.”

“Oh that yes. She is quite the hellcat.”

“Yes she is. Is there anything that can be done to temper that.”

“Yes and no my Lord.”

“Speak plainly onna.”

“There is no way to just temper her but I can give you full control of her body.”

“I’m listening.”

“I know of a spell that will turn her into a puppet. Her body will follow your every command without fail.”

“What will you need for such a spell?”

“Not much. A strand of her hair, a strand of your hair and something that is precious to her.”

Kagewaki strokes his chin thinking of what might be precious to her. ‘That comb! She seems very fond of it.’ “I can get those for you.”

“Good. I can do the spell on the next full moon.”

“Excellent. That is in 3 days.”

“But I require payment.”

“You will have whatever gold you wish, dear onna.”

“Good. Sleep well my Lord”

“You as well.”

Kagewaki exits her room and walks down the hall, slipping into Avalon’s room. He quickly locates the comb she carefully laid on the tsukeshoin. He picks it up, admiring the handy work. It truly was a fine comb. ‘I wonder where she got it?’ He finds some loose strands of hair in the teeth smiling. ‘How convenient.’ He walks back to Nisshoku’s room, comb in hand.

Nisshoku looks up from her futon recognizing the Lord.

“Did you change your mind?”

“Hardly. I have the items you need.”

“Oh, that was quick.”

Kagewaki hands her the comb and he pulls several strands of hair from his head.

“And where is the precious item.”

“It is the comb.”

“Oh?” Nisshoku examines the comb. “It doesn’t look so special to me. Nevertheless I will cast the spell in three days, when the full moon passes overhead.”

Kagewaki smiles wickedly and says darkly. “Good.” He turns, leaving her room to return to his bed to be with Avalon. As much as it was about dominating her and breaking her, he found he enjoyed the warmth of her body next to his. ‘Perhaps with this spell, I can keep her as my bed mate.’

Avalon wakes in Kagewaki’s bed as normal. She walks into her room to dress and take care of her personal needs. She instantly notices the comb is missing. She checks under the tsukeshoin, then she walks into the bathing area, checking around there as well. She starts to panic, not being able to find it. ‘He took it.’ 

She sits on the floor as tears slip down her cheeks. ‘Why? It was just a comb.’ Avalon wipes her tears and dresses acting as if nothing is bothering her. She trains as normal that day and things go as they normally would.

The night of the full moon comes and Kagewaki takes Avalon’s arm, wrapping it around his elbow, heading to Nisshoku’s room. “What is this Kagewaki?” 

“I thought we could all share this special moment together.” He holds her firmly in place. 

Avalon allows him to escort her along. “What special moment?” she asks suspiciously. 

“The moment, you no longer defy me.” He slides the door open, dragging Avalon in the room with him. “Nisshoku begin,” he speaks quickly, forcing Avalon onto her knees in front of Nisshoku. 

“What?” Avalon tries to get up but Kagewaki holds her in place.

“Of course my Lord.” Nisshoku pulls the comb out and the hairs wrapped around the teeth. She places the comb on Avalon’s forehead and starts chanting. 

“That’s my comb!” Avalon exclaims as she struggles with Kagewaki and tries to get her forehead away from Nisshoku. 

Kagewaki slaps Avalon across the face, hard enough to knock her down and make her nose bleed. He sits her back up for Nisshoku. “You know you told me some very interesting things when you were sick,” he smirks as he speaks. “About someone called Sesshomaru, a powerful demon…someone that will feed Naraku and where to find him.” 

Avalon feels the blood pouring from her nose, down her throat and over her lips, making her cough. She turns to Kagewaki and spits the blood at him. “You will never have him!”

Nisshoku grabs her chin roughly and holds her head while pushing the comb on to her forehead as she continues to chant 

“I will have him  _ Avalon _ ,” he whispers in her ear. “You told me the Jewel will return soon. You told me, I will find him at Asano’s castle. And when this is done, you will give him to me.” He kisses her cheek, cracked lips pressing against her skin. “Such a good girl.” 

Avalon’s eyes widen. ‘How could I have said so much?’ “I will never betray him! You sick bastard!” 

“You will have no choice,” he says as Nisshoku continues to chant. 

Nisshoku stops her chanting to look over at Kagewaki. “Her will is quite strong. You're not helping.” She goes back to chanting, trying to supress Avalon’s will. 

“By all means, continue,” Kagewaki quiets, keeping Avalon from moving. 

Avalon hears the chanting and can feel her body relax without her permission. Her mind starts to fade into the background and her eyes grow dull. Nisshoku continues her chant until she no longer feels resistance from Avalon. Nisshoku stops her chant smiling. “It’s done. She is yours to command.” 

“Shall we test this control?” Kagewaki lets her go. “Ava, stand up.” 

Avalon stands without hesitation and is still.

“Hmm, she looks perfect,” Nisshoku purrs. 

“Ava, kiss me,” Kagewaki commands her firmly. 

Avalon turns to face him walking towards him. She leans her head up and stands on her toes to kiss Kagewaki. She brushes her lips against his and then stands normally. 

Kagewaki enjoys the kiss, holding Ava around her waist and then glances over his shoulder at Nisshoku. “How is the spell broken?” 

“Oh, why would you want to break it?” Nisshoku asks curiously. 

“I don’t want others to be able to break it. How is it broken?” he speaks more furiously. 

“I see. Well lucky for you, the only one who can break the spell is me,” she says slyly to him. 

“And if someone kills you?” 

“Please? As if anyone could kill me.” She chuckles darkly. “But no, my death would not break the spell.” 

He leans his mouth next to Avalon’s ear and whispers so Nisshoku can’t hear. “Kill Nisshoku, my sweet one.” 

Avalon watches as her body summons her sword. Reiki fuses into her muscles and she runs in a flash to Nisshoku getting behind her. She slashes her sword, beheading Nisshoku before Nisshoku has time to realize what is happening. Avalon watches helplessly as she kills the woman. 

“Good girl,” he holds his arm out to Avalon, as they leave the room. “Now you are mine.” 

Avalon follows Kagewaki without any emotion crossing her face. Her body follows his commands and she is helpless to stop it.

He brings her out into the courtyard of the castle and asks Avalon, “When is the Jewel returning?” 

Avalon’s face stares at him blankly. She says nothing. She looks in his direction but not in his eyes. It seems she is looking through him. ’He doesn’t control my mind!’ She feels relief as she will not be giving any more secrets away. 

He grabs her face by the chin, harshly, leaving puckered red marks. “When is the Jewel returning?” 

Her face remains blank, not even reacting to the pain. Internally she is smirking. ‘I will never talk, you bastard!’ Her body has no reaction, her eyes still blank. 

“Dammit.” He releases her furiously. “Well, at least I have your body.” He grins as he leads her back to the bedroom. ‘She will deliver Sesshomaru to me.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and Kudo!!


	18. The Tomb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru takes the pearl hidden in Inuyasha's right eye.

Kagewaki was very aware when the jewel shattered across the sky. He had planned his moves carefully. He knew where Asano castle was so he and Avalon left to visit Asano castle and wait for the moment Sesshomaru would show. He would unleash his dear, Avalon on the wounded demon. He knew there was no way she would lose and Kagewaki would absorb the corpse and be stronger for it.

Sesshomaru sees the pink light shoot across the sky. ‘Was Avalon telling the truth?’ Sesshomaru sniffs the air looking for Avalon’s scent. ‘I will find her, then I will hunt the halfbreed down.’ He’s confused when he can’t catch a hint of her in the wind. ‘Is she dead or behind a barrier?’ 

“Where are we going, my Lord?” Jaken asks confused and amazed by the light show in the sky.

Sesshomaru ignores his question and makes his way slowly to the miko’s village to find the strangest sight, men and women floating in the air as if possessed. 

“What in the seven hells is that?” Jaken freaks out seeing the floating humans.

Sesshomaru whispers, “Hikari,” more to himself than anything. He picks up her scent and runs with all his speed to find her. Jaken clings to his pelt. Her scent leads out of the village but he also smells blood. He comes across Hikari tending to the wounded old miko Keade. Jaken Jr. stands guard over them.

“Sesshomaru what are ye doing here?” Keade’s withered voice rasps.

“This Sesshomaru is looking for Avalon,” he answers flatly.

“Why do you care?” Hikari pipes up defensively.

“She has gone to train and is not here,” Kaede’s says unsteadily. Hikari wraps the wound. 

He can smell the hanyou on them but the scent is stale and old. ‘Where has he gone?’ “This Sesshomaru will leave then.”

“Yeah just go! You’re not wanted anyway,” Hikari says bitterly.

Jaken follows Sesshomaru but looks back at Hikari and Kaede worriedly then turns back to see where his Lord is going.

He explores the area and finds a group of warriors missing their heads. 

“Well these guys are goners for sure,” Jaken says, looking at the corpses.

There is a faint scent of the demon that had once captured Avalon. His nose leads him to one man in particular. He zeros in on his chest and reaches in and finds a scroll. Pulling it open, he reads: 

_ Destroy the village where the Miko Kaede resides and kill a child named, Hikari if the castle falls. _

Sesshomaru’s feels rage. ‘Why target Hikar? And what castle does Naraku care about?’ His Dokkasō melts the scroll in his hand. ‘These men are harmless now.’

Jaken watches fascinated by what Sesshomaru is doing. “My Lord?”

“We go Jaken.” He turns to leave. 

Just at that moment a small lithe oni jumps down in front of him. She has a voluptuous body, with curves and ample breasts, barely covered by a skin tight black dress. “Oh me, oh my, such pretty silver hair. I really must have it.” 

Sesshomaru looks at the woman with disdain.

The oni pulls her sword and jumps at Sesshomaru, ready to take his head.

Sesshomaru produces his whip and spins on his heels. The whip cuts into the oni, slashing through her body, up and down, right and left. She falls to the ground in tiny pieces. Sesshomaru walks stepping on the pieces with Jaken right behind him.

Yura slowly puts herself back together. “Drats. That did not go as planned. Too bad,” she pouts. 

Sesshomaru walks away leaving the oni behind, searching for a trace of Avalon or the demon Naraku. He had questions and he wanted answers.

After several days of not finding any hints of Avalon or Naraku, he makes up his mind to get his father’s sword. ‘Let’s see if you were correct about Tetsusaiga as well Avalon.’ 

Making his way to Kaede’s village, he can smell the tainted blood of the hanyou, and it’s fresh, letting him know the baka is there. A wicked smile graces his lips momentarily. ‘A black pearl hidden in his right eye.’

Sesshomaru walks in the moonlight with Jaken following behind. He follows his nose to the scent of the hanyou. He hears a funny little conversation:

Inuyasha calls. “Get down!” 

An unknown female voice says, “Inuyasha!”

The hanyou says, “Something’s coming. Can’t you feel it?”

The female says, “Inuyasha what’s wrong?”

Sesshomaru makes his way slowly walking to see the pair and says flatly, “Jaken.” 

Jaken shrinks under his Lord’s words. “Yes miLord?”

He continues monotonically “Once we are through, I want him dead.”

Jaken shiver but answers, “Yes miLord.”

The young man clad in red, with silver hair points his finger at Sesshomaru yelling. “It is you, Sesshomaru!”

Sesshomaru feigns being touched. “Indeed I have quite missed you as well, little brother.”

The young woman wearing a blue short skirt and a long sleeve shirt with black hair says. “He called you his brother does that mean he’s--”

Sesshomaru zeros in on the girl. “Hmmm a mortal. How interesting?”

The young raven haired female becomes defensive. “Yeah what of it?”

Sesshomaru looks over at Inuyasha. “Others would be shamed but with you little brother, the girl quite suits you. These human creatures, I should think you’ve had enough of them. Or is it a taste from father?”

Inuyasha growls at Sesshomaru and says, “That’s not all, is it? You couldn't have come all this way just to tell me that.”

Sesshomaru replays patronizingly, “Be not a fool. I have no such time to waste. The tomb of our father, where must I seek it?”

Inuyasha inquires, “Our father’s tomb, why ask me?”

Sesshomaru replies in a bored tone, “Seen yet never seen. Protected, yet never known to its protector. No other clues are known.”

Inuyasha gets into a fighting stance. “I got no idea what you are talking about. Besides, even if I did, there's no way I’d tell you.”

Sesshomaru replies in a deadly tone. “I see.” He rushes forward. 

“Sesshomaru you bast---” Inuyasha starts just as Sesshomaru reaches him and grabs Inuyasha by the neck, lifting him up.

The young woman jumps back and gasps.

Sesshomaru plunges his finger into his brother’s right eye, testing Avalon’s words. He feels a solid mass and pulls it out. “Father was determined to keep it a secret. Which is why he chose to hide it here.” His heart pounds lightly in his chest. ‘She was right.’ A part of him wonders where she is that he has been unable to find her.

The young woman screams at Sesshomaru. “Stop it!”

Sesshomaru drops Inuyasha.

Inuyasha covers his right eye and looks in slight awe at the item that came out. “What?” 

Sesshomaru looks down at Inuyasha realizing he really didn’t know about it. “Well then little brother, since it was obviously done without your knowledge, come.” He leaves no room for argument. ‘This will be entertaining.’ 

Just then, a small voice can be heard and a little speck calls, “Lord Inuyasha!” It hops on the young woman’s shoulder. The young woman rushes to Inuyasha and crouches next to him. “Inuyasha?”

Sesshomaru continues his monologue, “No wonder searching beneath ground was useless. Seen yet never seen. Protected but never known to its protector. Our father’s tomb was hidden inside a black pearl deep within your eye.” ‘Avalon was right,’ the thought refuses to leave his head. ‘Does this mean she was right about Bakusaiga? About loving a human child?’

Inuyasha gets up, jumping at Sesshomaru, slashing with his claws. “You bastard!”

Sesshomaru moves quicker than his brother and responds by using his whip, lashing out at him while saying, “Die.” Sesshomaru strikes Inuyasha several times until he knocks him down.

Just then the young maiden shouts, “Hey you!” 

The call momentarily distracts him from attacking Inuyasha. ‘How like Avalon.’ A smile threatens to curve his lips but he keeps his face stoic.

The small speck on her shoulder says, “Kagome, don’t or he will kill us both!”

Sesshomaru turns from both, sweeping his eyes about for his vassal and calls,“Jaken.” 

Jaken comes to his side. “Hai miLord.” He hands Sesshomaru Nintōjō.

Sesshomaru raises the staff high in the air. “At last the moment has come.” He stabs the tip of the pearl with the staff, until it glows bright pink, emitting a rose hue around them. The old man’s head on the staff laughs.

Jaken speaks, “the old man laughs. It means the tomb will open.”

The pink light erupts into a swirling white and black patrol. Sesshomaru and Jaken step in.

Kagome watches in amazement and exclaims, “They're gone!”

The little speck of a flea jumps onto Inuyasha’s shoulder, exclaiming desperately, “The portal! We must move quickly before it closes! Do you want your brother to take your father’s treasure? It’s your sole possession from him!?”

The white light shines on Inuyasha's face as he stubbornly says, “Let him. What do I care?”

The flea’s voice distressed as he jumps up and down. “But sire…”

Inuyasha grits his teeth before saying, “I never said I’m not going in there, okay. Say your prayers Sesshomaru. YOU’RE DEAD!” Inuyasha looks back at Kagome and says. “You stay here, it’s too dangerous for yo--.” He notices she is no longer behind, he turns looking back at the portal. “Huh?”

Kagome steps into the portal calling over her shoulder, “What do you want? An invitation?”

“Hey!” Inuyasha shouts as she steps completely into the portal. 

Inuyasha enters and calls in a patronizing voice. “You realize Sesshomaru’s there?” 

The dimension shifts around them with purple and pink swirls. Kagome looks back at Inuyasha and says, “Well duh! That’s why we gotta go. No one does that, no matter who he is.” she states matter-of-factly.

Suddenly they are falling from the sky over a wasteland with rock formations and an extremely large skeleton in the distance. Fog whips about the world. A flying skeletal birdlike creature catches the pair.

Inuyasha looks at the huge skeleton and says, “Father.”

Kagome looks at the same skeleton. “Huh? Those bones there, are your dad?”

Inuyasha replies defensively, “What else would they be?”

Kagome says considerately, “Not that he wasn’t alive once too, but--” Her face contorts with annoyance. “What do you mean what else? They're huge, okay?”

The flea clings to a bead on Inuyasha's nihongo and speaks wisely, “It’s true. They’re huge because he himself was of incomparable stature. Here he is in truest form, undisguised. The treasured sword was embedded in his bones. That is what Lord Sesshomaru is after.” 

Inuyasha and Kagome steer the birdlike creature towards the large skeleton.

Sesshomaru stands in front of a platform with swirls that mimic flames. “Here is what I have sought. At last I will take possession of the sacred sword, the lethal legendary blade known to kill a hundred in one stroke. Tetsusaiga.”

Jaken says in reverence, “They say it was forged from the fang of your father’s own mouth. Once you possess the blade, Tetsusaiga, you possess his power as well.” 

Sesshomaru wraps his hand around the sword only for it to reject him, burning his hand in a blue flame. 

Jaken says disheartened, “It’s not stuck is it?”

Sesshomaru says indifferently as he looks at his hand. “Father has done his work well. The blade is ensorcelled. There is a barrier around it.” ‘Did you know it would reject me, Avalon? Was this what you kept from this Sesshomaru?’

Inuyasha screams, “Sesshomaru! We’re not finished yet.” He leaps at Sesshomaru, claws ready to strike. But when Inuyasha lands, Sesshomaru has disappeared. “Now where’d he go? Huh?”

Sesshomaru perches on a rib behind Inuyasha and higher up. “Be more respectful, it’s our father’s tomb.”

Inuyasha turns to him and says angrly, “Look who’s talking! You’re the one who’s here robbing his grave. Why not respect him by leaving?”

Myoga jumps on Inuyasha’s shoulder excitedly. “Lord Inuyasha! Look back! Look back!”

Inuyasha glaces around. “Back where? How come?”

Myoga continues, “Do you see it? The blade from your father’s fang, Tetsusaiga!”

Inuyasha goes over to the sword stuck in the platform, walking around it. “What? You mean this? What a piece of junk. Tetsusaiga what? It wouldn’t even cut paper wet.”

Myoga insists, “Lord Inuyasha, you must draw the sword, please and you Lord Sesshomaru, you couldn’t pull it out? Could you?”

Sesshomaru scoffs. “Do you mean to say Inuyasha can?”

Myoga backs into Inuyasha’s hair as he speaks “Of course, it was always intended that Lord Inuyasha should inherit it. He...he...he was entrusted with the tomb, wasn’t he? That should be proof enough, if you ask me. Now hurry, hurry! And claim what’s yours!”

Inuyasha becomes frustrated with the conversation. “What entrusted? What inheritance? For all I care, he can keep the rusty piece of junk.” Inuyasha yells at Sesshomaru, “What I do mind though, is all the other stuff! Good thing you’re in a grave, because you’re going to die!” 

Inuyasha dashes at Sesshomaru aiming to hit him.

Sesshomaru effortlessly dodges. “Now was that aimed at me?”

“Damn!” Inuyasha curses.

Sesshomaru’s condescending voice comes out, “You fight as though you’re still a child.”

Myoga pleads with Inuyasha, “You can’t fight unarmed. The sword. Get the sword.”

Inuyasha turns on Myoga. “You, shut up!”

Kagome’s angry voice grabs Inuyasha’s attention, “Inuyasha!”

Inuyasha looks up at Kagome. “Huh?”

Kagome continues, “Get the dumb sword.”

Inuyasha confusion is clear for all to see. “Kagome?”

Kagome feels like rolling her eyes. “Sesshomaru couldn’t pull it out right? If you can’t hit him in the body, hit him in the ego. Hurt his pride.”

Inuyasha finally understands what she is getting at and laughs. “I get it. I’ll do it. If only to see the look on your face. This is going to be more fun than I thought.”

Inuyasha leaps up onto the platform, pulling at the sword.

Jaken stutters, “N-n-no! Inuyasha is immune to the spell that thwarted Sesshomaru-sama?”

Myoga’s voice holds an air of superiority, “I knew it. Tetsusaiga is fated to become Lord Inuyasha's!”

The sword remains in place as a circle of light forms around it, while Inuyasha pulls on the sword.

Kagome yells. “Pull harder! Draw it out!”

Inuyasha struggles, grunting before giving up.

Kagome is stunned. “What?” 

“Huh? Yo!” Inuyasha says to Myoga.

“Hai,” Myoga answers.

“I couldn’t pull the sword out, could I?” Inuyasha squeezes the flea slowly while Inuyasha’s brow twitches

“Not really, no,” Myoga replies. 

“Are you done? I am.” Sesshomaru dashes at Inuyasha slashing at him. Inuyasha barely dodges his attack as Inuyasha runs to get some distance and Sesshomaru catches up to him, slamming Inuyasha’s body against a rib. “Dokkasu will sublimate you!” Sesshomaru’s hand glows green as it sprays an acrid green substance that melts the bones where Inuyasha’s head had been only moments ago. ‘Damn you Avalon! What other secrets were you hiding from me?’ 

‘That was too close,’ Inuyasha thinks.

Sesshomaru catches up with Inuyasha again asking, “Running?” Sesshomaru leaps up using his whip to slap at Inuyasha as he blocks only to fly back after receiving a powerful strike.

Jaken waves his staff menacingly. “Don’t worry Milord it’s all taken care of --”

Kagome jumps down crushing the imp. “You coward!” She leaps off to face him.

Jaken is momentarily stunned and gets up, raising his staff. “Oh why you?” He slams his staff down at Kagome.

She catches it saying, “You stinking toad!” And struggles to push it back.

Jaken pushes back. “You stinking human!”

Kagome pants as she pushes the staff further back. “This human’s going to kick your--”

Jaken screams over her. “I don’t think so!” He knocks her over.

Inuyasha sees Kagome fall and is momentarily distracted. “Kagom-ugh” Sesshomaru lands a punch directly to his gut and then hits Inuyasha in the face knocking him down.

Jaken taunts Kagome, “What’s the matter? Is that all you got?”

Kagome reaches up on the platform regaining her bearings and grabs the hilt of the sword. “Not even started.”

Inuyasha lays on his back, struggling to get up before leaping at Sesshomaru. “Ahhhh!”

Sesshomaru’s left hand reaches claws out hitting Inuyasha in the chest stopping his advance. Sesshomaru draws his right hand back as it starts to glow green. “The time has come...die.” ‘You would think I would spare the hanyou.’ Sesshomaru leaps and smashes Inuyasha into the ground with his left hand still gripping Inuyasha’s front. He flexes his fingers on the right hand, cracking them as they glow green ‘First I kill this one, then find Avalon.’ 

Kagome bearing witness cries, “INUYASHA!” Tetsusaiga pulls from the platform in her grasp. “Oops.”

Sesshomaru hears her and stops his advance. The green light fades away instantly as he turns his head looking over to the girl. “Huh?”

“It just...came out.” Kagome gazes at the sword in her hand.

Jaken gasps flabbergasted.

“Sorry,” Kagome says. ‘Now what?’

Jaken speaks, “That’s impossible. If the two of them couldn’t do it, how could a mere human ever hope to --”

Inuyasha slashes at Sesshomaru. “Don’t look at her! Look at me! Huh?” He misses looking around for Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru stands before Kagome. “What are you? How were you able to draw the sword?”

Myoga speaks, “Good thing he’s after her now and not us, eh Lord inuyasha?” He sighs in relief.

Inuyasha scolds Myoga, “Be quiet!” He raises his voice, “Sesshomaru leave her alone! She’s not involved in this!”

Kagome looks past Sesshomaru, yelling to Inuyasha, “Inuyasha!” She threatens Sesshomaru, brandishing the sword. “One step closer and I’ll kill you.”

Sesshomaru turns back to look at Inuyasha. “Neither you or I could draw Tetsusaiga. Yet she was not stopped by the barrier. You expect me to let her go?” ‘Avalon, was this another omission? Treacherous Onna.’ His mind fumes with hatred for Avalon and a desperate need to find her when this battle is finished and throttle her until she spilled all her secrets. 

Inuyasha admits, “You’re right it is weird she could do it and we couldn’t, but she’s still just a human girl. Kagome, give him the sword. There’s no choice!”

Kagome stubbornly holds the sword. “No way! Why does he automatically get to keep it? If he couldn’t pull it out, it means he’s not supposed to have it. He’ll have to come and take it.”

Inuyasha yells at Kagome in frustation, “Don’t be stupid! You’re only a human! So back off! Shut up! And butt out!”

Kagome points the sword at Inuyasha. “Butt out? What do you know? You’re just a--”

Sesshomaru interrupts their squabble, growing bored. “Inuyasha you seem very interested in the actions of this human. Why protect her? Why let her go?” Sesshomaru brings his left hand to brush his hair back behind his ear. “Why love her?” 

Inuyasha blushes and mumbles.

Sesshomaru walks closer to Inuyasha as his fingers glide through his own hair and his hands drop. “Certainly these feelings of mercy of yours are not something I inherited from our great and terrible father.” Sesshomaru looks off to his right as he speaks, “It was this feeling for a mortal woman, your mother. This weakness of heart that led our father to his demise. Tainted blood courses through your body. Is it this blood that endears you to humans? I do not pay heed to such vulgar creatures.” He outstretches his right hand before turning to Kagome and spaying a green mist on her

Kagome clings to the sword. “Inuyasha!” She turns the sword in the path of his poison mist as everything melts consuming the girl, leaving a pile of green goo.

Inuyasha rushes forward screaming, “KAGOME!”

Sesshomaru lowers his hand as the green light fades from it. “So fragile, don’t you agree?” he asks flatly.

“Sesshomaru!” Inuyasha says in a deadly tone.

“And not just humans-- half breeds too.” Sesshomaru moves to look over at his brother.

Inuyasha rushes at Sesshomaru screaming, “Sankon Tessō!” 

Sesshomaru leaps out of his way as he uses his pelt to wrap Inuyasha up, bringing the hanyou close to his face. “With tainted blood like yours, you cannot touch me.” He slings Inuyasha away with force, causing Inuyasha to slide along the ground and crash into the side of a large rib, cracking it.

Inuyasha struggles up. “You,” he say darkly.

Sesshomaru uses his light whip, striking Inuyasha in the arms, face and legs. “You forget your station. WORTHLESS HANYOU!” He sends Inuyasha flying back and up to a high rib crushing it.

Inuyasha blocks his face with his robe of the fire rat remembering his childhood. “A half-breed am I. That’s right. I remember my mother, she was crying, crying for me. She knew what it meant and what my life would be like.” Inuyasha rises up looking where Kagome’s grave now sat. “Half-breed or full-breed, to me it doesn’t matter but when you insult my mother that’s when I get angry!” Inuyasha dashes at Sesshomaru. “I’m gonna make you pay!” He strikes Sesshomaru’s chest plate as Sesshomaru moves to dodge leaping away from Inuyasha. “That was for mother and this-- this is for Kagome.” Inuyasha leap up striking Sesshomaru again in his chest plate as yellow sparks erupt from the contact.

Jaken runs forward in disbelief. “This can’t be happening. A moment ago he couldn’t hit Sesshomaru-sama at all.”

Both brothers land. Inuyasha on his knees and hand. Sesshomaru stands tall, looking down as the carrass breaks on his armor. A smirk crosses his face and he mocks Inuyasha. “All that for a memory and a dead mortal girl? If I’d known that’s what it took to make you fight, I’d have killed her sooner.”

Inuyasha turns ready to tear Sesshomaru apart threatening him, “I’m gonna slit your stomach, take out your guts and put ‘em in a bowl! By the time I’m through, you’re gonna wish it was you who was dead!”

Kagome emerges from the goo. “Shoo, I thought I was a goner.”

Inuyasha is shocked to see her alive. “Huh?”

Kagome looks angrily over at Sesshomaru. “Hey you! You tried to kill me! Didn’t you? Don’t go thinking you’re gonna get away with it.” She holds the sword pointed at Sesshomaru as she walks sideways to Inuyasha and places the blade in his hand. “Here, I think we underestimated it. Don’t let me down.”

Inuyasha holds the blade, still stunned seeing her alive. “Hey, uh...how come you’re still alive?”

Kagome looks down at her hands. “Mmm...uh...I don’t know.”

Sesshomaru speaks. “The sword. That’s what protected you.”

The ground rattles under Sesshomaru’s feet.

Myoga hops on Inuyasha shoulder. “It’s true those claws of his are deadly poison. It had to be the sword or she really would have died. Why not put it to a real test and try it on Sesshomaru.”

Sesshomaru speaks darkly, “Big words for such small vermin.” Sesshomaru starts emitting a red aura as a wind circles his body and skulls fly up circling him. A few fly forward smashing into Inuyasha as Kagome hides behind his back.

‘What’s his problem? What a jerk,’ Kagome thinks.

“Let’s see if a half-breed can even wield the Tetsusaiga. I, Sesshomaru, shall be the witness.” Sesshomaru’s eyes glow red and his face elongates and white fur covers his skin before the red aura consumes his entire body as it shoots up and around before he lands as a giant white dog.

Kagome gasps. “He changed!”

Inuyasha looks on unimpressed. “Good cause now we know his real form.”

Sesshomaru barks at Inuyasha aggressively several times, bearing his shark teeth.

Inuyasha chuckles. “Now that I’m using this, I’ll win for sure.” Inuyasha backs up as Sesshomaru advances on him. “Yup I’d say this battle’s just about finished before it ever starts. You go hide until it’s over.”

Kagome says, “Ok sure...but where?”

Inuyasha leaps forward. “Here goes. This is it sword, time to show me what you’re made of!” Inuyasha hits Sesshomaru on the back of his head as Sesshomaru leaps to crush Kagome. 

Kagome screams running out of the way.

Inuyasha looks at his sword. “Didn’t even make a scratch, huh?” Inuyasha dodges as Sesshomaru leaps to crush him. Sesshomaru tries hitting Inuyasha and Inuyasha dodges over and over again before Sesshomaru’s fangs drip with dokkasu, creating a mist of poison on the ground that melts whatever it touches.

Inuyasha looks over at his shoulder Myoga. “What’s the deal? This sword can’t even bruise, let alone cut!”

Myoga tidies a bag ready to sling it over his back. “Well...uh...Lord Inuyasha, I suppose that, uh it’ll make a lovely heirloom if nothing else. Besides, it’s the thought that counts. Now if you’ll excuse me.” Myoga leaps from his shoulder running away.

Inuyasha calls, “Hey, hey, whoa.”

Myoga calls right before he takes off. “And don’t let that Sesshomaru push you around ok?”

Inuyasha sees the poison gas and yells, “Kagome, quick get up off the ground!”

Kagome backs away. “What do you suggest?”

Inuyasha motions with his sword. “Just climb, up, up, up!”

Inuyasha dodges as Sesshomaru attacks over and over again.

Kagome looks over her shoulder as she climbs crying, “Inuyasha!”

Myoga stops to warn Kagome, “No! Just climb! Even a demon can’t stay in those fumes for long!”

Jaken scampers up the vines and bones. “Lord Sesshomaru I can’t --”

Kagome looks down concerned. “What about him? What about inuyasha? Will he be ok?

Myoga goes to shrug and loses his balance. “Uh probably not huh forget the heroics it’s every flea for himself come on!”

Kagome calls down. “Inuyasha!” And then climbs higher as the gas rises.

Inuyasha dodges Sesshomaru’s attacks, enveloped in the green poison fog, coughing. “Even I can’t stay down here too much longer.” Inuyasha leaps up out of the gas grabbing onto a rib high up. He couches, more struggling to lift his body up on top of the rib. “My arms and legs are going numb.” 

Just as Sesshomaru comes out from the fog clamping down on Inuyasha with his jaws and pulls him down back into the cloud of green gas. Sesshomaru thrashes his head left and right. 

Inuyasha says, “Even a useless sword like this has to be more irritating than a mosquito bite.” He stabs the blade into Sesshomaru's right eye.

Sesshomaru rolls around trying to dislodge the sword before leaping out of his father's body, breaking through the right shoulder.

Inuyasha manages to get out of Sesshomaru’s mouth and holds on to the fur on his chin.

“Inuyasha!” Kagome screams as she sees them both emerge from the skeleton.

Inuyasha lets go, landing gracefully. 

Myoga jumps around in the bushes. “Now do you see the power of Tetsusaiga? Oh you’re giving Sesshomaru what for I hope. Woo-hoo!”

Inuyasha looks over his shoulder. “Where have you been? This thing’s about as useful as a walking stick!”

Myoga squints looking at the blade. “Oh? So maybe it isn’t from your father.” He drops into the bushes and runs.

Kagome looks surprised at where Myoga was just a moment ago. “Hey, he left!”

Inuyasha looks at Sesshomaru as he says, “Why am I not surprised? In the meantime what am I gonna do with this thing?”

Just then Sesshomaru leaps at Inuyasha trying to smash him with his claws. Inuyasha doges, then Sesshomaru’s paw comes at Inuyasha and Inuyasha slashes at it with the sword.

Kagome cheers, “That’s it! Sock it to him Inuyasha! I think the first one hit!”

Inuyasha looks at Kagome like she has lost her mind. “What are you nuts? That wasn’t even close.”

Kagome smiles. “But the sword’s yours now. All you gotta do is believe in it like I believe in you!”

Sesshomaru whimpers as he brings the paw Inuyasha stuck up to lick.

Inuyasha chastises Kagome. “You are nuts. This sword is good for nothing. Me I’ll live, I'm half demon. You though, you ain’t got a chance.”

Kagome’s voice falls as she starts to cry. “So I should just give up hope?” 

Inuyasha freaks. “What...what are you doing? You’re not crying are you? NO CRYING!”

Kogome yells back. “Oh should I laugh!”

Inuyasha counters harshly, “No, you should shut up and let me protect you.”

Kagome gasps.

Inuyasha walks away to fight Sesshomaru. “You stay here and watch.”

Kagome becomes reflective. “Wait a sec...I didn’t imagine that, did I? Did he just say he’d protect me? “ ‘In some ways, he is like his brother but in others, he’s totally different.’

Inuyasha stands at the ready. “Yeah, yeah. Roar, roar to you too buddy. Let’s get it over with.” Just then Inuyasha hears his sword pulsing like a heartbeat. Buh-dump, buh-dump, buh-dump.

“Tetsusaiga is pulsing. I can hear the sound from before. No, this time it’s different.”

Jaken cheers, “Get him Lord sesshomaru! Bite his little head off! That’s right nibble off his little -- ow” A skull hits Jaken in the back of his head.

Kagome had thrown it. “We’ll see who eats who.” She tosses several more skulls at his head. ‘You can do it, I just know it’

Sesshomaru leaps in the air to pounce on Inuyasha with his front left leg.

“Now!” Inuyasha jumps slashing as the sword transforms, slicing up Sesshomaru’s leg before cutting it clean off.

Sesshomaru collapses on his side as blood pours from his severed limb. ‘Shit,’ Sesshomaru struggles to stand. ‘I’m losing too much blood.’ Black flecks, sprinkle into his vision. ‘I can’t breathe.’ Shock washes through his body at the sudden removal of a limb. 

Inuyasha notices that his sword has changed. “Huh? It looks like a fang.” He waves it around. “It is a fang. The old man did leave me something worthwhile.”

Sesshomaru stands with his limb still hemorrhaging blood as Inuyasha stands in front of him.

“So here we are, two brothers fighting over father’s sword. But compared to him, you and I are nothing. Don’t you get it? We’re like a couple of fleas jumping around on his body. We would be lucky if he didn’t squash us flat! So maybe I don’t have too many memories of him, but it was me father chose to hide his tomb in. I’d rather give up an eye than give up his sword. Maybe I’m not so worthless than. Am I?”

Sesshomaru launches himself at Inuyasha as Inuyasha slashes him across the chest several times. Sesshomaru flies backwards with yellow light protruding from his chest. He transforms into a ball of blue light and transports away as Jaken runs after him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo!!


	19. Avalon vs Sesshomaru

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Avalon and Sesshomaru face off in a fight to the death, but in the end something happens that neither one of them expects.

Sesshomaru decimates the army intent upon destroying Asano castle for no other reason because they are in his way. He is tired, his arm aches, his head is light from blood-loss. The pain radiates from the end of his bleeding stump, to the otherside of his chest, down into his stomach and makes him want to gag. He needs rest, he must rest. 

Kagewaki and Avalon look on with Lord Asano at the demon destroying the army. Avalon walks out of the castle followed by Kagewaki. He stays far back to watch Avalon destroy Sesshomaru. Avalon summons Murasaki no Raikō and approaches as Sesshomaru finishes the last of the men. Avalon calls, “Sandāsutoraiku” Purple bolts swirl around her blade and she slashes down pushing the lightning out at Sesshomaru’s turned back. 

His senses warn him before he has a chance to turn. He reaches for Tenseiga, black envelopes him until the lightning strike is finished. He coughs, ducking and panting. Looking up, his eyes widen in shock. “Avalon?” 

Avalon’s eyes are dead as she continues to walk with her sword glowing. She calls once again, “Sandāsutoraiku!” She sends a wave of purple energy at him.

Kagewaki stands over looking with a wicked smile. ‘She is perfect.’ 

Sesshomaru grips tenseiga again, dodging forward, then backwards, to the side, then twirls missing the strike. ‘What’s wrong with your eyes?’ The silver streaks that had fascinated him before, in the green are pale, hollow. The color of dry grass. “Avalon, stop!” he commands her. 

Another scent makes its way into his nose. He sees the demon standing at a distance. “I knew you would betray this Sesshomaru,” he snarls sending his whip flying at her neck and rushing her with his right arm, ignoring the burning pain in the other. ‘I’m too weak for this.’ 

Avalon raises her sword, stopping the whip from coming near raising a purple transparent sphere of reiki around herself, while calling forth her reiki to her limbs increasing her speed. Nisshoku had taught her well. She rushes to meet him, slashing at his neck. 

“Dammit,” he leaps backwards, removing tenseiga from its sheath. If only he had Tetsusaiga. This...he parries her blow to his neck, annoyed that he can’t do more than block with this blade and he lacks another hand to strike back. “You knew this would happen!” he yells at her, twisting, elbowing her in the stomach as he spins. She crumples from the blow. 

Avalon rolls on the ground swinging her sword in a circle around her. Purple reiki encircles her and rises up her body. She looks up and smiles cruely as she pushes her blade into the ground and forms her hands into a ball. The reiki takes a new form. She pushes it out in a large circle he cannot dodge. The wave rushes at him. She grabs her sword once again calling, “Sandāsutoraiku.” The purple lightning circles and she moves her blade down again pushing the lightning out towards Sesshomaru. 

He leaps backwards to give himself time to dodge, gripping Tenseiga to form the barrier again, but not before one of the strikes slashes into his already injured arm. More blood spills from the wound. He lands on his knees, breathing heavily. He gives himself no time to recover or staunch the pain he is in before he leaps at her again. He grabs her around the neck and slams her backfirst into a tree. “You reek of him.” He tosses her body onto the forest floor. 

Avalon gets up without a word and no sign of pain. She calls, “Sandāsutoraiku,” and then charges at him, following her attack. She slashes with her sword, aiming to cut him from his left shoulder down to his right hip. 

He catches her wrist, eyes shifting to red. “You knew this Sesshomaru would lose his arm, that I would be weakened now. Fool.” ‘If she knows this Sesshomaru so well...take the bait Avalon.’ His eyes grow larger, pupils turning to blue as he summons the strength of his true power. He flings her against a tree, disturbed by her eyes and the one standing and watching. 

Avalon gets up from being tossed as if nothing has happened. She coats her body with reiki creating a burning barrier around her whole body. She rushes at him with her sword. 

“Sandāsutoraiku!” Purple light surrounds her sword and she pushes it into the ground. The ground rumbles as the energy builds till the ground shatters under Sesshomaru’s feet and purple lightning shoots up at him. 

“Fool,” he boasts. “I knew you would take the bait.” He ceases the transformation, flies over her head and sends his whip flying at her, circling around her, until it coils and then stabs through her left side. He recalls the whip, completely unsettled by the lack of emotion as a steady flow of blood drips from her side. “What did you do to her?!” he calls to the demon standing off to the side. 

Kagewaki smiles. “You would be surprised at her resilience. I was. She was too rebellious. I had to change her. For the better, don't you agree?”

Avalon stands without an emotion, no show of pain. She grabs something from her sleeve charging the bo shuriken with her reiki and throws it, striking Sesshomaru in the back as he is speaking to Kagewaki. 

He grunts at the impact as numbness leaks down his right side. He rips the bo shuriken out of his right shoulder and throws it at the demon who has been watching them, then turns in a fury on Avalon. He flies through the air and lifts her up by the neck, slamming her onto her back. He whispers, “was this your endgame? Find yourself a power and then stab this Sesshomaru in the back?” He coughs back the pain he is in. 

Avalon takes the opportunity to stab her sword clean through Sesshomaru’s stomach. 

The pain flames through his belly as breathing suddenly becomes that much harder. His eyes widen in shock and he chokes on the blood bubbling in his throat. ‘Where are you? Why can’t you wake up?’

Avalon holds the blade still as his blood flows on her hand. Tears start streaming down her face. She pushes him off her with her free hand and straddles his bloodsoaked lap. She pulls the blade from his stomach and holds it against his throat. Crying trying with everything she has in her to not kill him. ‘I can’t let him die if he dies, who will kill Naraku?’ 

For a moment, the world blurs as he lays on his back, struggling to catch his breath. His body is covered in blood, it drips down his waist, his arm, his back. He reaches a hand out and gently wipes the tears from her eyes. “You’re still in there aren’t you?” He coughs up blood, rolling onto his side, it leaks from his mouth. 

Avalon looks at him with the tears flowing from her eyes. ‘Please Sesshomaru, I’m so sorry. I wish you could hear me. I’m so sorry.’ Avalon’s blood flows from her wound. 

“Fight it Avalon.” He cups her chin in his hand. “Listen to my voice. Fight it. Whatever he did to you.” He chokes again, this time vomiting blood from his stomach. He forces himself up again and continues stroking her cheek. “I believe you.” The world is going out again, he can’t breathe. 

Avalon watches as his eyes close and she finally breaks through Naraku’s control. “Sesshomaru! Please, you can’t die. Please don’t die.” Tears flow unbidden. 

Kagewaki comes forward taunting, “It’s only a matter of time now Avalon,” he pronounces her name like a hissing snake. “He’s injured, bleeding out, and you? That stomach wound looks nasty.” 

“Don’t listen to him.” Sesshomaru struggles to breath. He closes his eyes, letting his yoki rise to attempt to heal the wounds in his body, but he can feel the reiki stopping it. “Remove…” his eyes close again and he swallows the urge to purge himself again. “I can’t heal.” He hopes she knows what he is asking, he can barely see. Everything is so dark, but they cannot win if he loses consciousness now. 

Avalon thinks for a moment. ‘Remove? What should I remove?’ Then it hits her. She pulls her reiki from his body, in droves of purple light as her hands hover over him. She hopes it isn’t too late. 

His father had once told him in a moment of desperation, he could force his wounds closed. He focuses his yoki to course through his veins, sealing the wounds in his stomach and back, leaving the one in his shoulder and grafting the skin in his missing arm. He rises off the pine nettles and leaves, wiping his mouth clean of the blood. “Stay behind me.” 

Kagewaki backs up. “You may live, but it is too late for Avalon. At least the Murasaki no Raikō Miko is no more!” he taunts as he forms a cloud of miasma around his body and takes to the sky and flies away.

Avalon coughs and holds her bleeding side. “I’m so sorry Sesshomaru.” 

He stumbles landing on his knees, moving slowly to her. He slices through the black haori she is wearing and the underlayer. He pulls them open exposing the wound from his whip. His fingers trace a snake-like scar that runs the length of her neck down to her abdomen, but there is no time for questions. He turns her over, yanking the haori off her back. “It goes straight through,” he tells her gently. “Can you move?” The sliced into the side of her abdomen, cutting several inches in. 

Avalon looks at him. “I’m not sure.” Avalon tries to move and feels how her side is moving in two seperate directions. “I can move, but I shouldn’t. I’ll only bleed out sooner. Not that it matters, I am glad you are alive.” 

He gazes at her confused that she is reacting like this. He sniffs the air, to ensure that they are alone. “It’s not safe here.” Help is not something he is used to asking, “I need to make bandages. Do you have enough strength to ensure our safety?” 

“Hand me my sword. I can make a barrier I am sure.” 

He sits up painfully on his knees, handing her the blade and removes his armor, tossing it to the side of them, then pulls his haori off, leaving on his underlayer. He slices it into strips to wrap around her waist. It’s not as easy as he thought. He props her on an upraised knee, then bites down on a long end to create tension. “This is going to hurt, bare it.” He pulls it tight to staunch the bleeding, making her scream in pain. 

Avalon holds her sword through the pain. Even as she screams she keeps her barrier up. She takes a few deep breaths. “Sesshomaru this is pointless. Kami, it hurts so bad!” She curls her hand around the wound, shaking from the pain. 

“Dramatic female,” he rolls his eyes, then removes his inner layer. “Let me cover you.” He lifts her up carefully to thread her arms inside the garment and folds it over her. 

“You are not listening!” Her blood soaks through the bandages and soon starts coating the garment he wrapped her in. Her teeth start chattering, she feels so cold. “Sesshomaru just hold me please?’ She shivers, her lips quiver. “Please? I’m so cold.” 

He cocks his head to the side, putting pressure on her stomach. ‘Why isn’t the bleeding stopping?’ He touches one hand and then the other, feeling them losing their warmth. His eyes dilate, suddenly understanding that she is not recovering from this wound. Black specks cover his eyes. He shakes his head to clear them, then falls forward, catching himself on his arm. He lost too much of his own blood. Soon he would be asleep. “Avalon?” 

Avalon reaches out a shaky hand for his face touching his cheek. Sesshomaru can feel how cold her hand is. It feels like death. “I’m here. I’m sorry I can’t fight by your side anymore.” She closes her eyes and tears start flowing. “Kami it hurts. I’m so cold. Please make the pain stop!” 

He collapses next to her, dragging her to him with his good arm. He can hear her heart slowing, her skin paling. “Why aren’t you healing?” She’s covered in her own blood and without his other arm, he can’t apply enough pressure. 

In a shaky voice she replies in a whisper, “Because I’m ningen.” Closing her eyes, her body convulses several times then stops moving.

“Avalon,” he shakes her to get her to rouse. He lets her down on the forest floor, cursing the state of his body. He slaps her cheek. “Wake up!” He slaps it again. “Wake up…” He covers his eyes, refusing to admit that he is becoming desperate. ‘This is my fault. If I had not left her, if I had not...’ His fingers touch the soaked area of his underlayer. He knows now that she was telling the truth. The entire time and he was too arrogant to see it. She must live. He considers using Tenseiga, allowing her to die but then her voice and the look of the dead child reminds him, “it can only be used once,” he mutters to himself. He cups her chin and rests his forehead against hers. “You will not die. Forgive me.” 

He opens the undergarment and slices through the bandages he made to expose the wound. He digs his claws into his own stomach, wincing at the pain, separating his skin to allow his blood to filter into her wound. He rests his head between her breast, listening to the faint thud of her heart, while his life-force mixes with hers. “Stay with me.” 

Avalon feels the pull of death, the comforting darkness, then a sudden stinging pain consumes her. She feels her body curl around the weight on top of her as the pain surges through her body. Her wounds start to close and her heart beats furiously. Her eyes snap open. She looks down and sees a head of silver hair between her breasts. In a hoarse whisper she says, “Sesshomaru?”

He pulls back, panting from the strain of healing her, from the beating his body took as blood gushes from the hole he cut in his middle. He says nothing before he collapses on top of her, unconscious.

Avalon watches with slight worry and she curls her arms around him in a hug. She pushes him off her gently and examines herself. Her abdomen is healed. She then looks at Sesshomaru and sees the wound on his stomach. It runs from one hip to the other and gushes with blood.

She rushes to cover the wound with her hand. She looks around to see if there is anything she can use to stanch the flow. Not seeing anything, she takes her sword and cuts one of the legs off her hakama and pushes the cloth into his wound. “Don’t you dare die on me now!” Avalon growls as tears flow down her face. 

Slowly the bleeding stops and she pulls the cloth back and watches with amazement that the wound is healing quickly. She smiles and breathes a sigh of relief. Avalon looks around as her own energy reserve drains away. The abyss of sleep calls her. The call is too strong she can’t fight it much longer. She sets up a barrier of reiki before falling asleep next to Sesshomaru. 

He groans as his eyes acclimatize to the early morning light. It casts a blazing glow on them. He swallows stiffly, finding a weight on his only arm and his fingers wrapped around a half bare waist. He knows the scent of hair against his nose and finds it smells delicious, more intoxicating than it did in the past. He leans his nose in deeper and begins nuzzling her hair, then tries to sit up, only to smack into her barrier and feel his scalp burn. He drops her from his body thinking to shake her awake only to dip his nose into her neck again. She hints of honeydew, cantaloupe and cream. He dips his nose against the skin of her shoulder completely taken by desire. 

Avalon wakes slowly feeling something against her shoulder. She slowly opens her eyes and sees silver hair and moves her neck up to give him better access. She brushes her hands in his hair and finds herself in flamed with desire. She smells his scent of fresh rain. She brings his head up to look at her. 

He holds himself slightly upright on his right arm, glancing in annoyance at the missing left. This would be awkward. An odd passion is burning within him. Whatever he had felt before, to satiate a primal act is raging within him. He presses his face into hers, daring to taste her lips, unable to hold her to him and hold himself upright at the same time. He pulls back too distracted by her near naked upper half and tries to sit up again. Once again he smacks his head into the barrier, and lands on top of her with a frustrated growl. 

Avalon smiles but her body burns with desire. She wants to kiss him so much. His lips are so tempting. She rolls her body and his over while moving the barrier up so she can sit up and straddle his hips. She looks at his face and his eyes with a questioning expression. ‘Would he allow her?’ She leans over bringing her face close to his. Her lips are a hair's breadth away. 

He threads his fingers through her hair and pulls her face down to his, embracing her mouth. His hand runs the length of her neck, attempting to pull the tattered underlayer from her shoulders. 

Avalon kisses him and starts grinding herself against his hips and she tries to shrug out of the material that is still on her upper body. 

He tugs on the back of the material freeing her of the top and rolls her onto her back, pinning her wrists above her head. 

The change in position brings Avalon up short. ‘What is this?’ She tries clearing her foggy mind, shaking her head. She finally breaks through enough to think about what is happening. “SESSHOMARU? What is going on?” 

He runs his nose over hers, down her lips and into her neck where the scent is the strongest. He clamps down on the skin softly, careful not to break her skin. Then sits up, slinking a hand down to her hikama, intent on taking them off her. 

“Sesshomaru, stop. Answer me? What is this?” she demands as her heart rate starts to rise. 

The change of scent to fear confuses him. “Why are you scared?” He dips his fingers into her hikama to tug them down. 

“No! Stop! Get off of me!” She pushes at his chest trying to get him off her. “Please stop!” 

“Avalon?” He kneels over her, cupping her chin. “You are scared of this Sesshomaru?” 

“This Sesshomaru is acting like a crazed dog! Why are you acting like this?” 

‘Crazed dog?’ he thinks quietly, but a fire is raging inside of him. His mind is fogged with need, but her fear of him is creeping through. She is beautiful, something he hadn’t paid much attention to in the past. He cups her face and is about to kiss her when she smacks the sides of his head to make him stop. He grabs both her wrists, pinning them above her head. “You don’t feel this?” 

Avalon struggles to free her wrists. “I feel something. NOW, let my wrists go.” Her reiki rises to the surface without her summoning it. It crackles under his hand 

The heat hits the palm of his hand. He hisses releasing her, then it hits him, almost painfully that it was not just his blood that had healed her the day before but his yoki. He closes his eyes, regretfully. ‘How much did I use?’ The memories are foggy, but this ache...he was told of this need. He opens his mouth to speak, then closes it, suddenly trying to stand, only to smack into the barrier again. “Drop the barrier.” 

“No.” Avalon keeps the barrier in place and cries in frustration. “What’s going on?!” She still can feel the burning desire to join with him but she was too scared of her own wants 

He reaches out touching it, testing its strength. She’s scared, he can smell it. “Who was he? Naraku?” 

“Stop, avoiding the question. What is going on with us? And stop touching it. You’ll only hurt yourself.” 

“Pain is irrelevant.” He attempts to force his hand through, his skin sizzles. “Did he violate you?” 

“Every night,” Avalon bitterly says, the tears flow and the pain pungent. “Tell me what is going on with us and stop trying to change the subject.” 

“You’ve grown in strength.” He removes his hand, admiring the burn marks along his wrist. “Did he hurt you?” 

“Kami Sesshomaru, why are you asking that? He hurt me. He raped me every day. He abused me mentally and would threaten Hikari’s life to get me to comply,” she sobs confessing the truth. “Two days after you left me with the monks he had me. Are you happy now?” she cries trying to hold back her anger. “Now will you tell me what is going on with us?” 

He pivots back to Avalon and sits down next to her opening his arm out, inviting her to come closer. 

Avalon looks at the offer and considers coming into his arm and gives into a childish desire for comfort and moves herself to be in his embrace. 

He reaches behind her, handing her the tattered underlayer to garb herself. He rests his head against the top of hers, unsure how to tell her, the raging fire they both feel is the result of a bond that connects them and needs to be sealed with the one thing he knows she has never really had. “Get dressed. You’re safe now. I will not allow him to take you again.” 

Avalon puts on the bloody tattered garment covering herself. “Will you leave me again?” 

“I saw the pink light and the underworld.” He refuses to admit that he was wrong to her. “Did you know I would not be able to wield the sword? And that this would happen?” He rolls his stump. 

Avalon says just above a whisper, “Of course I did.” 

“Avalon,” he says her name gently, losing sight of his annoyance, she had said he should give up the sword. “Is there a way to remove the barrier?” 

“On Tetsusaiga? No. But if you truly wish to protect humans, you might be able to wield it. I’m not sure, but it’s not meant to be yours Sesshomaru. You are meant to surpass the sword. But this is not what we need to talk about. You know what is going on with us but you are trying to change the subject.” 

“Do you trust me?” 

“How can you ask me that?” Avalon thinks bitterly. ‘You abused me, abandoned me and I was forced into Naraku’s hands. And now you’re acting like a crazed sex animal. I trust you about as far as I can throw you. I don’t know why but part of me still wants to trust you.’ 

“You curl against this Sesshomaru like a frightened child. Do you trust me?” 

‘If that is what you need to hear from me.’ “I trust you. Now tell me what is going on.” 

“You’re not very good at lying,” he sniffs her hair. “Your scent changes and the speed of your heart. Lower the barrier, then I will tell you.” He isn’t telling her he needs space or he may not be able to stop himself from taking her. 

Avalon drops the barrier. 

He stands again offering her his hand. “Walk with me. Men are coming.” He can hear and smell them in the distance. 

Avalon takes his hand without thinking about it. She allows him to lead her away. 

He takes her through the trees, deeper into the forest to the sound of rushing water. The river runs quickly nearby. For a moment he leans over it, cupping water into his mouth. “This is not the same with one hand.” 

“I imagine not. Allow me?” She reaches in and cups water in her hands bringing it to his lips allowing him to drink. “You will adapt.” 

He holds her hands in his closing his eyes. It would have to be discussed. Just the feel of her fingers made him aroused. “You are mine now. The blood I used to heal you, was infused with my yoki, enough to create a bond between us. This feeling between us will not be sated until we are intimate.” 

“Excuse me? I’m yours? What does that mean exactly? We are intimate then what? You toss me aside?” Avalon can feel the sadness rising within herself. ‘He thinks to use me just like Naraku.’ 

“You won’t be able to deny yourself,” he says smugly. “You are mine. That is all you need to understand.” 

Avalon’s fury surfaces. “I won’t be a sex toy again Sesshomaru.” The tone promises death. 

“Sex toy? What is a sex toy? Is this something from your land?” 

“It was what Naraku used me as. I warmed his bed when he desired. I had no choice in the matter. I won’t do that again. I won’t be someone’s possession, a toy.” Avalon walks over to the cliff over the raging water below.The tall grass brushes at her side as she looks down and sees the white caps of the water and can see jagged rocks below. Her sorrow surges, ‘I can’t do this.’ She summons her sword to put up a barrier. 

“What are you doing? Have you gone mad?” He attempts to approach her, before she plunges off the cliff. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo. We want to hear from you


	20. Sesshomaru’s Desperate plea

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gravity of the forced bond begins to kick in. Sesshomaru explains to Avalon what happened between them but the threat on Hikari remains.

She turns back to face him. “Stay back!” A sob breaks through. “You can’t stop me.” The barrier crackles angrily, roiling with her emotions. “You just told me you own me. I am no ones.” Her voice pitches with desperation. “You insist we must be intimate and I cannot resist it.” Avalon turns around stepping closer to the edge, debating if she can really jump and end her life. She was raised a Christian and was taught suicide would bring her to hell but she was already in hell wasn’t she. Her tears flow ‘I don’t know what to do.’ 

He clenches his fist in fear that she will make good on her promise. “It is an honor to belong to one such as I.” He moves closer cautiously. “Drop the barrier.” 

Avalon lets out a harsh laugh. “An honor to be owned. I don’t want to be owned. Do you want to be owned?” 

“How is this any different than a human pairing? The husband owns the wife. Drop the barrier.” 

“You don’t know where I come from. No one owns anyone. A husband and wife are equals. Will we be equals?” 

“You would put your traditions above that of my kind.” He circles, shaking his head, frustrated. 

“It was how I was raised. It was what I dreamed of before I was raped.” Avalon looks over her shoulder. 

“Why didn’t you find a lover then? You let the rape define you.” 

“No I simply found comfort within myself. Before I came here I was fine in my daily life, I was successful, I was respected, men would beg to go out with me and I would simply turn them down. I had no need for a lover. One does not need another to be complete.” She angrily replies. How dare he judge her. ‘I wanted love, it's true, I was lonely at times but I was okay with it. As long as I didn’t have to worry about getting hurt.’ Avalon smiles thinking of the poster she had in her room of Sesshomaru. ‘How ironic the only love I wanted was from you, but you won’t love me.’ A scowl comes on her face. ‘You will only own me.’ Tears start flowing. ‘I thought you were safe.’ A heart wrenching sob breaks through.’I was a fool to try to control you in anyway. You're more wild than anything I have ever known.’ 

“You had dreams before but refused to live them. What are you so afraid of? Why do you hide behind that barrier? Men would beg and you hid. This isn’t the life you wanted. You cannot even tell yourself the truth.” 

“You can’t get me to drop my barrier by taunting me. You are much faster than me. If I were to jump without it, you would stop me. I don’t want you to stop me. I need answers, Sesshomaru. I can’t live with only being a possession, I'd rather die. If you decide it’s time for me to open my legs and I don’t want to you’ll take me anyway. I’m yours afterall right?” she says bitterly.

“I wouldn’t rape you,” he says tenderly. “Avalon...I will not ask you for this.” 

“But you just told me we will have to be intimate, meaning you will force me eventually! And since you own me, would it really be considered rape?” she accuses. 

“Avalon,” he says more sternly. “Look at me.” 

Avalon shakes her head stubbornly contemplating how painful it will be when she lands.

“I will not force you. That is not what is meant to happen when mates are bonded. I will not force you to my bed. Ever,” he pleads with her. He takes a deep breath to calm his nerves. “It is meant to bring us closer together, not drive us apart.” 

“But no matter what I want, my urges will drive me to your bed right? I have no choice in this. I don’t want that. I want to be in love and be loved not just...just” Avalons head shakes, tears spilling down her cheeks.

“You will not be forced. The urges will become more powerful the more we resist, but I will not force you.” He tries again to drive his hand into the barrier, cringing from the pain of it prickling his skin with blisters. 

“So what…what happens? We are intimate and then...what? Do I just become an obedient little ningen who obeys your every command? What happens when…when I…what will it be like being bonded to you?” 

“I don’t know,” he says softly. “Does a man know a woman so well before they marry in your kind? You’re scared and rather than facing it, you hide behind that barrier.” 

“We do know each other. When a man and woman marry they are together for a time and get to know about each other. Many even live together before they marry. So yes they know each other well. Stop touching the barrier it will only burn you. But don’t think I will drop it out of pity.” 

He lets his yoki rise higher, allowing his hand to dip into the barrier, while his skin blisters. “I did not give you that time,” he says guiltily. “This is not what should have happened. But you wanted to love a youkai. You have that chance now.” 

Avalon laughs bitterly. “But will that youkai ever love me?” Her shoulders slump as more tears fall off her chin. 

“I don’t know,” he says softly, gritting his teeth as he tries to force his hand through the barrier. ‘A little more and I will have her. Where is your fire Avalon?’ 

“Will you even try?” she asks dryly. “You made it pretty clear to me where I stand. I’m nothing to you. I’m worthless and you have no use for me. You didn’t choose to bond me. It would be easy enough to shove me away. I won’t do that, I won’t be shoved to the side,” Avalon puts more reiki into her barrier. She can smell the pungent odor of skin burning. 

His strength is fading, but he forces his hand further in, he just needs the barrier to drop long enough to stop her. “Avalon,” he tries to keep his voice steady. “Look at me?” 

Avalon’s head turns looking over her shoulder. “Yup. You’re burning your hand pretty bad.” Her vision flicks back to the water in front of her. 

“Look in my eyes,” he says sincerely. He won’t allow her to jump.

Avalon turns around to look at him fully. She strengthens the barrier causing it to errode his flesh. Her bitterness and a slight maliciousness seeps through. “I told you I wouldn’t pity you and drop it.” Avalon takes a step back hovering one foot over the edge. ‘I can end this now, with just one more step.’ 

“Did you see this future?” 

Avalon answers flatly, “No I didn't. I wasn’t here. I’m not supposed to be here. Even more reason for me to die.” 

“Take my hand,” he ignores the pain in his hand. “There is a reason you are here. If this future was not what was meant to be, how can you tell this Sesshomaru how he will feel? You will not be forced, you will be honored.” 

“I don’t understand what that means and I can only look at what I know of this time. You told me I am yours. Tell me what it means to be owned by you?” 

He shakes his head. “How can I ask you to understand like this? Your life has value, Avalon. You fear a future that is unknown. Trust me, please,” the desperation in his voice surprises even him. He shouldn’t care whether she jumps or not, yet his heart is desperate to save her. “This last time, trust me.” 

“Trust you?! TRUST YOU?!” Avalon laughs “You lied to me, you nearly killed me and now I should trust you? You abandoned me to Naraku,” her voice breaks as her knees fall out from beneath her. 

He goes to his knees with her, biting his bottom lip as he plunges his hand through the barrier to grasp her wrist, fighting the pain he’s in. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “Trust me, this last time, as you did before.” 

Avalon screams, “NOOOO!” But she makes no move to pull her arm out of his grasp. 

“I won’t hurt you,” he says, weakly caressing her wrist with his thumb. “Trust me.” 

Avalon shakes her head as she weeps bitterly. 

He chances forcing the rest of his body through the barrier, burning himself from head to toe with her power. He pulls her into his chest, rocking her. “You’re safe now. None will hurt you again.”

Avalon wraps her arms around him burying her head in chest “Don’t hurt me, please,” she whispers. 

“You will...tell me...when you are ready,” he tries to reassure her as flecks of skin start to fly off from the barrier. “Release the barrier.” He sags against her, losing consciousness. “I won’t hurt you.” 

Avalon’s barrier shatters around her as she continues to cry into his side. 

He attempts to force his eyes open, so painfully weak from the loss of his arm, from the battle the day before and now this. “Forgive me Avalon.” He attempts to hold her, but his arm stings. “I am sorry. Don’t jump,” he mutters before the blackness finally takes him, stealing his consciousness. 

Avalon can’t even think right, she just cries until she falls asleep against him toppling both of them to the ground. She wakes a little while later and whispers “I’m sorry I hurt you.” Avalon curls her legs up to her breasts and wraps her arms around them still confused by all that she feels. Her body is yearning for his. She watches Sesshomaru as he sleeps. 

He rolls onto his side, still bare from the waist up, his pelt wrapping under his head. 

Avalon tentatively reaches out and brushes her hand through his bangs. Then pulling her hand back she looks around reaching out with her senses. No yokai are around but men were around. Avalon frowns looking at her clothes or lack of clothes. “Sesshomaru you didn’t take us far enough.” Avalon summons a barrier that obscures people's views and starts rocking herself. Whether they could see or not was irrelevant.They could not enter. It would have to do till Sesshomaru was recovered. 

Avalon grabs the remains of the shredded clothes and puts them on the best she can. She watches as the sun makes its way across the sky as her stomach growls at her. ‘I haven’t eaten since last night. When are you going to wake up?’ Avalon grabs his shoulder and shakes him. “Wake up!” 

Sesshomaru moves with the hand shaking him. 

“Grrrr! Why won’t you get up?” Avalon pulls her hand away bringing it to rub her face. 

He begins to groan in his sleep. His right arm slides up to cup the stump on the other side. “Tetsusaiga,” he mutters in his sleep, his body heating. “Give me Tetsusaiga.” His body begins to shake with chills, teeth chattering, skin reddening. 

“Sesshomaru?” Avalon looks over at him with alarm on her face. She feels his forehead, it’s boiling. “Shit! You’re running a fever.” She gets up looking about. “Crap! crap! crap! Come on, think girl.” 

Just then she hears a familiar voice. “Sesshomaru-sama where are you?”

Avalon looks through her barrier and sure enough the little imp had found them, but was lost, not being able to see them through the barrier. Avalon lowers it.

Jaken jumps back suddenly seeing Avalon sitting next to an unconscious, writhing Sesshomaru. “What did you do to him!? You treacherous wench?”

“I...uh...well...um...forget...it. He needs water and a fire.”

“What?” Jaken rushes over to Sesshomaru and looks him over still unsure of what has happened. “His yoki seems to be depleted. There must have been a great battle.” His head turns his eyes ablaze. “You!”

Sesshomaru’s body rolls onto the side where the stump is, only for a whimper to leave his lips and his body rolls onto the other side again. “Tetsusaiga…” His lips tremble as his free hand leaves indents on the stump, trying to stop the pain. “Pain…” 

“Me?” Avalon squeaks, “Jaken how do we help him?” 

“What are you doing with my Lord? And half naked?”

“I’m guarding him till he wakes up...and about our clothes well--” Avalon’s cheeks redden “You will have to ask him.”

“Well his yoki is gathering and he’s in pain. I wasn’t able to get the arm.”

Sesshomaru’s breathing speeds, the air comes in and quickly, his heart racing to compensate for the pain he is. He groans again, unable to find a comfortable position.

“Avalon!” Jaken yells at her. “He’s in pain.” Jaken starts crying. 

“Well I don’t know yokai medicine! What can help him? He’s shivering and he has a fever or at least I think it is, so I was going with fire and water to help with that. But it does nothing for pain.” 

Jaken paces thinking.

The growls grow louder next to them but quickly change to howls of pain. 

Avalon covers her ears then she pulls her hands away wanting to apply pressure to the wound but not wanting to hurt him more or get hurt in the process. “What about Natsushirogiku (feverfew)? It’s known to help pain and fever.” 

“You can try it. I’ve never seen him like this...Avalon exactly what happened?” Jaken scurries to the stump and leans near the end. “This should still be bleeding. What happened?” Jaken has to shout to be heard over Sesshomaru’s howls. 

“A lot happened Jaken, but that doesn’t matter right now. Watch him for a few moments. I’ll go get the plant.” Avalon rushes off looking for Natsushirogiku. She knew it was common and grew pretty much everywhere. She finds what she is looking for and picks the herb and runs back. “I got it!” 

“It does matter!” Jaken runs after her. “You don’t understand, if he used will power to heal,” he shakes his head. “Did he force his wounds closed?” 

“Ummm yeah, I think so, why?” 

He shakes his head, shivering. “It used up too much of his yoki. It’s why he’s in pain. Usually it covers some of the pain and heals him but this is different and if there were more injuries...help him? Please?” 

“Alright, alright. I hope I don’t get killed by giving him this.” Avalon puts the herb in her mouth and starts chewing. 

Jaken paces back and forth nervously. ‘He’s going to be in pain for weeks after this. Look at his perfect body! Ruined!’ 

Avalon walks over cautiously and grabs his chin, bringing his lips to her mouth. She spits the juices she made into his mouth while massaging his throat. She backs up before taking more of the herb and chewing. 

He feels the moisture in his mouth, dripping into the back of his esophagus, while pressure fills his neck. He swallows, coughing. His world is a blur of white and red. His fingers flex around the stump again, trying to will the pain away. 

Avalon finishes emulsifying the herb in her mouth. She comes back and grabs his chin again and pushes her lips to his forcing the concoction into his mouth. She grabs his throat and massages it again to get him to swallow it. “I hope this works. Jaken I need water.” 

Sesshomaru feels it again, the herbs in his throat. He doesn’t lash out at the lips touching his. He knows they are from the one who is his. His eyes flutter lightly and his hand cups her chin holding her forehead in place, as if breathing her breath will ease his pain. He can’t stop shaking. It’s as if some other power has taken over his body. “Pain…” he whispers. 

Jaken nods and runs for the nearby river, filling up a bowl shaped rock with the fluid. 

Avalon rests her forehead against his. “I know. Can you hear me Sesshomaru? I’m trying to help.” 

“Tetsusaiga.” He shivers coughing and then gagging.

“Crap, Sesshomaru.” Avalon rolls him over falling with his body since he is still holding her face. “Let me go please.” She sits with her rear end up and her head down to the side awkwardly leaning on her shoulder. 

He releases her face only to cup his missing limb again, massaging it furiously as the howling slowly subsides. 

“Here’s the water.” Jaken passes her the rock. 

Avalon takes the water and sips some of it. She places Sesshomaru’s head on her lap and brings her lips down to his and passes the water through the mouth. She massages his throat again and sets his head down to lay on her lap with him facing towards her. “Jaken how long do you think he will be out?” 

Sesshomaru still pants after he drinks the water. “Avalon,” the name barely escapes his mouth. 

Avalon runs her hands through his hair in a soothing motion. “I’m here Sesshomaru. I’m here.” She takes another sip of water and passes it through their lips again massaging his throat for him to swallow. 

He reaches out for her hands in the euphoria of his fever, pushing them to the stump. “Pressure,” he chokes out, still barely conscious, nearly seizing in agony. “Pain...p...pressure…” 

Avalon shakes her head. “If you think so.” She pushes her hand on the stump putting pressure. It won’t hurt him but it won’t likely help either. 

He buries his nose in the crook of his elbow, still breathing heavily, gripping the ground. His eyes open as slits, long enough to stare at her. “Stay,” he begs, too delirious to care how he sounds. 

“More pressure, Avalon,” Jaken encourages her. “It’s helping.” 

Avalon puts more pressure on his arm while looking at Sesshomaru’s face. “I’m not going anywhere.” Tears slip from her eyes. ‘I can’t believe I hurt him so bad. He wasn’t like this when Inuyasha took his arm in the series.’ 

He reaches up and pulls her down next to him. “I….need...you…” he gasps for air, swallowing hard, burying his nose in her hair, slowly falling asleep again. 

Avalon eyes widen. ‘You need me?’ She stays in place, not wanting to disturb his rest. She whispers,”Jaken, how long do you think he will be like this?” 

“Tomorrow, maybe the day after. The pain might linger but he should wake up tomorrow...I think.” Jaken wipes a tear from his eyes, then suddenly sees Avalon held down by his Lord. “What are you doing now, Onna!” 

“Well he seems comfortable. I don’t want to cause him any discomfort.” 

Jaken only sighs, “can you keep the pressure until tomorrow? He’ll sleep better without pain.” 

Avalon’s eyes widen.”I’m human and I’m hungry and I’m tired. What do you think?” 

“I’ll find food, Onna...maybe you can wrap it? Poor Sesshomaru-sama and that wretched Inuyasha.” 

Avalon shakes her head. ‘Well I guess it’s no worse than being in Naraku’s clutches.’ She shrugs out of her clothing, leaving her chest exposed before she starts wrapping the stump. She grabs her sword and cuts the other leg of her hakama off and slits it in half to wrap around her breasts. 

Jaken runs around Sesshomaru’s side and peers over his back. “He’s sleeping soundly now. If he can stay like this for a day, it should be enough...What did you do to him??” Jaken balks again. “You wicked onna! If he didn’t need you right now!” he bursts into tears again. 

“Jaken, I think I will let Sesshomaru tell you what happened, when he wakes. If he wishes to tell you.” 

“I’ll go find food,” Jaken says glumly leaving them. 

In his sleep Sesshomaru presses his lips against Avalon’s skin, exhaling as his body slowly stabilizes. 

Avalon feels his lips brush against her arm and feels his aura calming. She whispers, “I’ll stay by you if you need me.” She lays next to him waiting for Jaken to return. 

He can feel the heat and smell the familiarness. He moves closer in his sleep, his head coming to rest in between her breasts, while his nose nuzzles into her neck. He breathes heavily, deep in sleep. 

Avalon sighs. ‘Great I can only imagine what Jaken will think.’ She relaxes but then notices heat building in her core. Desire starts to flare within her. ‘What in the hell did you do to me, Sesshomaru?’ She encircles her arms around his neck resting them on his back. 

Avalon slumbers in Sesshomaru’s arm. Her head pushes into his face as she shifts slightly waking him up.

His nose finds its way into her hair, while his hand slides in the side of the fabric of her pants she wears to cover her chest. It slides up her neck in his sleep, then across her collarbone, travelling down to rest near her breast.

Avalon’s eyes snap open at the wandering hand. She starts to panic, thinking she is back in Naraku’s clutches and pulls away. Then she sees the pale flesh, the stripes and realizes it's Sesshomaru’s arm. She hits his hand. “Let me go!” 

He lazily opens his eyes, growling lowly, “Lower your voice.” He rolls onto his back, shielding his eyes with his wrist, still waking up. He groans then cups the stump. ‘I’m not used to this pain.’ He massages the skin to loosen the ache, finding it wrapped in bandages. “What is this?” he asks Avalon. 

Avalon scrambles away, turning around to look at him. She hugs herself rubbing her arms. “You were in a lot of pain and the pressure seemed to help.” 

He winces, unwrapping the bandages, inspecting the skin. “Jaken!” 

Jaken jumps at his name being called by his master. He is thrilled to see him awake. “Hai my Lord!” 

“Did you bring the arm?” Sesshomaru asks him, attempting to retie the bandages. He wraps them around the stump, but is unable to tie it himself, with one hand. 

Avalon moves over to help tie the bandages.

Jaken starts to stutter. “I... I... I am sorry my Lord. I was unable to retrieve it.” He lowers himself to the ground bowing his head. “Please forgive me?” 

Sesshomaru picks up a rock and throws it violently at his head, hitting it’s mark sending Jaken flying. “Dammit!” He cringes again, holding the stump, trying again to tie the bandage around his arm. “Find me a new arm!” 

Jaken gets up stumbling around from the blow not even looking at his Lord. “I will find you an arm my Lord.” He starts walking away in a zigzag pattern, slowly leaving Avalon and Sesshomaru alone. 

“Let me tie them.” Avalon tries grabbing the bandages. 

He stares off blindly at the trees and closes his eyes. “Tightly.” 

Avalon grabs the ends pulling the bandages tightly as he asked, “Is this enough or should I try to tie it tighter. I worry for your circulation.” 

“Circulation?” he mutters annoyed. “Tighter.” 

“Alright, but I’m going to insist on untying it to examine it after a little while.” Avalon pulls the wrapping as tight as she can. 

He snarls, feeling fire flash through his shoulder. “You know nothing of youkai injuries. This will heal.” 

“I may not know youkai injuries but I know you bleed, so I have to assume you need blood to feed your flesh to keep it from dying.” Avalon huffs crossing her arms defensively.

He snorts annoyed, then stands, stretching his arm. He goes to the river after and cups water in his palm, patting it onto the bandages, sighing at the cold water against his skin. He can feel the burn again, the one telling him to bed Avalon. He glances over his shoulder at her. 

Avalon hugs herself rubbing her arms looking at him. She can feel herself wanting to be with him and is so confused by it. “Sesshomaru, what did you do to me? I’m...uh...how do I say this? I feel...I need you. What in the hell is going on?” Fear and anger lace with her lust for him. 

He closes his eyes, sloshing the water over his stump one last time. When they open , they are red, large and dilating. His energy radiates off him as he bounds into the air as a white ball of light and lands in front of Avalon in his true form. ‘Fear, she still fears this Sesshomaru.’ The first step to her makes him trip, forgetting that he only has three legs to work with. He glares at the stump angrily. ‘I’m going to look like a fool,’ he realizes all too late as he stalks forward, balancing his weight more evenly on the three limbs and then hobbling lightly back to Avalon. He cranes his neck down and nudges her with his nose towards his back, then lays down on his belly waiting. 

Avalon looks at him incredulously. “You want me to get on your back?” 

He licks her cheek and nudges her again, groaning quietly. ‘This still hurts.’ He looks forlornly at the stump. 

Avalon walks over to the stump and looks up at him. “I wish I could heal this for you.” She continues walking to climb on his back. 

‘It’s your fault it’s taking this long.’ He rolls his eyes, rising onto his feet once he feels her situated. If she hadn’t attacked him when he was at his weakest and he hadn’t injured her to the point of death and then...he would have more yoki to spare for his missing arm.

He inhales the air deeply, ravenously, his stomach cramping. Food, he needs to eat. He finds his quarry further down the river, in the form of a herd of wild boars. He lands downwind from them, purposely sitting down to make Avalon lose her grip. She hangs off the fur of his neck, while he playfully shakes her to get her off. 

Avalon huffs, “You could have just landed and set your head down.” She leaps down landing on her feet. 

He nudges her towards the river that flows gently and growls softly again. She stinks of Naraku. 

Avalon looks at him with a raised eyebrow. “You want me to bathe?”

He gives her a more forceful nudge knocking her into the water, then turns away as he stalks his prey, slightly off balance from the use of only one arm. His steps are silenced as he crouches down and then leaps into the herd and devours one boar whole, then another and another and a third before hacking into the neck of a fourth. 

Avalon looks on scornfully at him as she strips her now soaked, scraps of clothes off and scrubs her body in the cold water. ‘Rude.’ She scrubs herself the best she can before making her way out of the water, teeth chattering from being cold. “You happy now?” 

‘She must be hungry,’ he thinks, coming back with a boar in his mouth and throwing it next to her on the ground. He avoids gazing at her naked body, turning away to allow her to cover herself. He lays down on his stomach again, relaxing in the sun. The heat is warm against his white fur. 

Avalon wrings out the clothing as best she can and puts them back on. Still cold, still wet, and still pissed. “You know I can’t just instantly dry off?” her voice is rough as she shivers. A smirk crosses her face as she stands up and leaps at him and uses his fur as a towel. 

‘So you want to play?’ He turns his body so she rolls onto his stomach then off the other side, until he is back on his stomach. He bites the back of her shirt and pulls her into his chest panting warm air on her, then licks her face. The motion makes the stump twinge but he ignores it.

“No-no-no, I’m trying to get dry.” She pushes at his muzzle.

He licks her again and nuzzles her stomach until she buckles laughing. 

She tries talking through her laughter. “Se...Sessh…Sesshomaru we need to talk,” she finally gets out.

He nudges her with his nose again, this time bumping against her face and then walks to the trees, pulling down a large dried branch, dropping it in front of her. He hacks it apart with his claws until it’s in manageable pieces, then pushes her backside to the pile. He grunts at her then growls, waiting for her to light the fire. 

“You think I can just light a fire?” Avalon goes and picks up two sticks. She holds one in her hand and uses the other to rub starting to create friction. “You know this is going to take forever, or you can transform and start the fire yourself.” 

He lazily lays down in front of the fire, letting the acid drip from his fangs until it begins to spark, then blows on it to feed the flames. He cocks an arrogant brow at Avalon stretching, then motioning her to the boar. 

‘So this is how you are going to play it huh?’ Avalon lays back and looks up at the sky ignoring his instructions.

He’s entertained by her boldness and decides to see if she will stay play. He pokes her stomach with his muzzle, then leans in wiggling his nose until she is giggling again. 

Avalon grabs her stomach and looks at him evilly before getting up and walking towards the boar to only stop short and make a barrier around herself. She sits indian style and props her elbow down on her knee and rests her chin on her fist smirking at him. She raises her eyebrow. 

Two could play at this game. He gets up and goes to the river to drink the cool water, lapping gratefully as the water rushes down his parched throat. He lays down by the bank, dipping the stump into the water, sighing at the release of pain from the cold water lapping against it. He could wait. 

Avalon watches as he lays with his stump in the water feeling bad. “Did the Natsushirogiku help with the pain?” she asks. 

He gazes at her confused, wrinkling his eyebrows, not remembering what had transpired the night before. ‘Did she give me something?’ All he recalled was pain, agony, torment, like he was being burned alive. 

“Uhhh...you don’t remember do you? I gave you Natsushirogiku. It seemed to help. Do you want me to give you some more? To see if it might help with the pain now?” 

He looks up lazily from the gentle currents flowing past his stump and exhales defeated. ‘I’m weak.’ He nods, refusing to meet her gaze, then sets his muzzle over his arm again, closing his eyes. 

Avalon drops the barrier to get up and search for the herb. Finding some, she picks it and then looks for some more. It was plentiful in this area. She found some more and gathered a large handful. She brings it back to where Sesshomaru is laying by the river. “Um...I think it would be easier for you to eat these in your humanoid form. You just chew them and swallow the juice. You don’t need to eat the actual plant.” 

He lifts himself slowly out of the water and walks over to Avalon. He leans down staring at her affectionately with softened eyes. ‘Are you so concerned about this Sesshomaru?’ He rests his muzzle just in front of her hands puffing hot air onto her body, putting his nose against her chest softly. 

Avalon uses the hand not holding the herb to rub his nose. Her stomach growls loudly. She moves her hand to cover her tummy. “Oh I’m so hungry. You mind if I get the food ready to eat for me?” She looks at him still wishing she could take away his pain. 

He gives her a nudge with his muzzle and as she walks away back to the fire, he transforms back to his humanoid form and follows behind her. The pain is less, but a dull ache remains. He stays behind her, quietly watching her without speaking, still in only hikama. ‘We’ll need new clothes.’ 

Avalon leans down grabbing one leg of the boar. She pulls it away from his body. She lets it go to pull her sword from her obi. She slices downwards cutting the limb cleanly for the animal. She swings the sword to get as much blood off as possible and runs the blade along what is left of her hakama then sheaths the blade. She leans down to grab the leg and walks over to the fire, places it in the flames, not caring if the skin burns. She turns, seeing Sesshomaru in his human form. She walks up to him. “Here, chew these and swallow the juices.” She offers him the herbs in her hand. 

He glances down at the herbs. “You gave these before?” He sniffs them curiously. 

“Yeah. They are  Natsushirogiku. They are used to help ease pain in humans but I figured it wouldn’t hurt to try and they seemed to help you.” 

He sniffs the herb in her hand again, raising an eyebrow. “You tried to kill this Sesshomaru and yourself.” 

“Yeah.” She looks down ashamed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t want to but I had no control over it.” 

He lifts the herbs out of her hand and eats them, chewing them and grimacing at the bitter taste. “You are trying to kill this Sesshomaru.” He forces himself to swallow the juices then spits out the leaves. 

Avalon exclaims, “NO! They just taste horrible but they help with pain.” 

He approaches the fire and sits near it, understanding he has to tell her the reason behind the flaming passion she feels and that he feels it too. There are questions he has and fear still lingers on her skin. He knows she was violated, over and over. ‘I cannot ask her to give herself now.’ Subconsciously he rubs his missing arm again until he realizes what he is doing and pats the grass next to him, inviting her to join him. 

Avalon looks over at him and thinks for a moment whether she wants to sit near him at this point. She decides to go sit by him. “Are the herbs helping?” 

He’s already humiliated but refuses to look at her when he answers. “Less. Sit closer.” He opens his arm. “Your cold.” 

Avalon looks up at him considering. She was cold but she wasn't sure about being so close to him. She shivers and then decides to lean into his side for warmth. 

He rubs her shoulder to warm her and removes his pelt, wrapping it around her body. “How did you want it to be?” He avoids her eyes for fear of losing control. She’s chilled next to him, but he wants her to feel comfortable with him. “The man you would have loved? The one you wanted to marry?” 

Avalon looks down considering. “I wanted us to respect each other. I figured he would want to make me happy and I would want to make him happy too. Why do you ask?” Avalon looks at the fire. 

“It isn’t an insult to be owned, to belong. Female Inu-youkai look forward to it, almost as a right of passage. The ceremonies are private and she submits to the male. But it’s not a full submission,” he closes his eyes, unsure how to explain it. He digs his fingers into the dirt and pulls moist dirt up, then rolls one against his leg into the ball, then the other. “When they are separate but together,” he holds them, the sides touching, “they are still individuals. But if one supersedes the other,” he closes his hand around both pieces, mushing them together. “They both cease to exist. What happened....what I did to save your life, is like a human marriage. It’s why this hurts,” he cups the stump. “I used too much of my yoki to heal you, to stop you from jumping.” 

“So we are married?” 

“Married, mated…” he shrugs his shoulders passively, unsure what to say next. 

“But I never asked for this. I’m supposed to choose who I’m to marry and you say I’m to submit to you. You can’t possibly understand the implications.” 

“It was not my intention when I healed you,” he finishes speaking slowly, unsure of what else to say. 

“Can’t anything be done to break this marriage, mate whatever you want to call it?” 

He shakes his head. “Death. Yours or mine.” 

“Well that isn’t an option. So I will be an individual but I will have to bow to your will. Won’t I?” Avalon’s voice drops, she knows enough about this time to know how it works. 

“Does submission scare you?” He drops the dirt onto the grass. 

“Submission. I’m not a submissive person. It goes against everything I was taught. I was violated so many times, Sesshomaru and I can’t see myself being submissive again. So does it scare me, no, it terrifies me.” 

“I wouldn’t take you by force, you know this.” He closes his eyes, trying to force her scent out of his nose and calm his stomach. 

“I know you won’t but this is just too much.” Avalon stares at the fire. “My body is yearning for you but my mind is reeling from everything. I just got free from Naraku and now I’m already bound to you. What about me? Where does my wants matter?” 

He listens carefully, smelling her fear rising. “I won’t ask you for intimacy now, not until you are ready. Wants?” He has no idea what she is asking about. “What wants?” 

“I want to have a partner in life, someone who will respect me and love me.” She shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter what I want, does it? I’m yours and that is all there is to it,” she says bitterly.

“You confuse submission with subjugation.” 

“Then tell me what a day as your submissive partner will be like.” She inhales deeply smelling the clean rain scent as she feels her body wanting to move more intimately onto him. She closes her eyes and focuses on what she needs to know, what is this life she is stuck in now.

“This is submission,” he says quietly, his lips brushing against her ear as he speaks. He runs his fingers up and down her exposed arms.

“Cuddling?” 

“Being close to this Sesshomaru when he asks,” he says proudly. “You should eat.” 

“Ugggg.” Avalon moves away to grab the leg out of the fire. “And what happens when I want to be close to you but you don’t want me near?” She sets the meat out to cool a little before eating it. 

“You never want space for yourself to think?” he asks, completely confused. “Females…” 

“That isn’t what I meant. Okay, let me rephrase this. What happens when you want me near but I want space?” 

His eyebrows knit together. “Are you incapable of telling this Sesshomaru you need space?” 

“So I can just say I need space and you will be fine with it? No arguing?” 

“I have never been bound before Avalon,” he says leaning back against his arm. “You expect to know everything now?” 

Avalon sighs. “I’m just trying to understand what this submissive thing is. You tell me it’s different from subjugation. So I’m just trying to figure it out.” 

He’s taken by a wave of pain and grips his missing arm, bending over on himself. He pants catching his breath. “I will not ask you to lose yourself.” He forces himself straight again, he groans, embarrassed to show so much pain in front of Avalon. 

Avalon rushes over to him and embraces him. “I’ll go grab some more  Natsushirogiku.'' She releases him and goes to grab some more leaves. She returns within moments offering the herbs to him. 

He takes them chewing gratefully, swallowing and spitting the leaves out. He lays down on his side, moving some of the spare branches to cradle his head, while staring at the sky. 

Avalon shakes her head. She grabs the leg of pork and walks over to him. She gets down on her knees “You don’t have to lay on branches.” She sits with her legs out. “Here.” She pats her thighs, inviting him to lay his head on her legs 

The corners of his mouth upturn weakly and he lifts his trunk back up, and scoots over to her legs. He lays down, with his head in her lap, still on his side, holding her around the waist. He buries his nose in her stomach, breathing deeply to distract himself, only getting wind of how hot and bothered she is. He nuzzles her belly. “This is also submission.” Then he takes one hand, putting it on the stump and whispers, “pressure.” 

Avalon uses one hand to put pressure on his arm. While she takes a small bit of the leg held in her other hand chewing it. She swallows then says, “You’re lucky I like you.” 

He snorts. “You’re lucky I saved your life. I would not be in this pain if I had let you die.” 

Avalon looks down. “You are lucky I broke through,” she says softly as tears slip from her eyes. “I’m so sorry Sesshomaru.” 

“As am I,” he whispers, rubbing her back. He grits his teeth again, moving closer into her stomach. “I did not...want this to happen to you.” 

“Ah...can’t change the past now can we?” She chuckles once. “Did you ever find the arrow?” 

“Arrow?” His breath is coming out faster. “Both hands.” ‘I don’t beg,’ he rebukes himself, but his arm feels like it’s on fire again. Like it’s on a roast.

Avalon takes one last big bit of the leg laying it down. She chews as she puts both hands on his stump pressing down with as much weight as she can. She finally swallows “Is this enough?” 

He nods against her belly. “You will not tell Jaken of this.” His pride is plundered. 

She laughs. “I won’t tell a soul. It’s beneath me to gab.” 

He slowly relaxes with the pressure, breathing more evenly. “I’m sorry, Avalon.” He kisses her stomach, with his eyes closed. “I should not have left you.” 

Her eyes harden and she stiffens. “No, you shouldn’t have.” Her body slumps. “Why couldn’t you have just listened to me? You knew I wasn’t lying.” 

He exhales. “Not to yourself. Would you have believed a woman comes dressed in strange clothing, not looking like someone from this land and asks your protection, then throws herself at you?...It is possible to believe the truth so deeply, that the signs of subterfuge are lost.” He closes his eyes, resting. “Perhaps you were just crazy.” 

“I am crazy, obviously,” she huffs. 

“No,” he mutters. “Strong-willed, Avalon. You will be treated with honor by my side, respect. You will not fear submission.” 

“But you want me to be submissive. What happens when I don’t agree with something?” 

“Do your couples not speak to each other?” 

“Of course we do.” 

“There are times compromise won’t be an option, when those times happen, I will expect you to yield, for your sake.” 

“Like with what? Do you think I would act foolishly and put myself in danger?” 

“You are too defensive, arrogant,” he mutters into her stomach, groaning as the herbs seem to finally begin to take the pain in his arm. “The things you have experienced, the violations, they make you narrow minded. You will trust me in those moments.” He rolls onto his back, breathing more freely, cupping her chin. “This is submission, do you fear it?” 

“I don’t fear helping you or making you comfortable but I know what it means to be a wife in this land. You have the final say in everything. I fear that.” 

“You carry too many worries, too many sorrows, too many scars.” 

“I have taken care of myself since I was 17. It’s what I know. I provided the food and shelter. I didn’t answer to anyone. Even when I traveled with you, it was so short. When I was with Keade it was short as well. But when Naraku took me my life changed so much. I’m not the same person you met originally. I keep the worries, the sorrows, the scars, they are mine. They are who I am now.” 

He shakes his head, taking her hands from his missing limb and putting them on his heart. “They are ours now. Would the youkai you met have rested his head in the lap of a human for anything other than pleasure? Perhaps we are both not who we were.” 

Avalon shakes her head. “You have changed. Perhaps it isn’t as hopeless as I feared.” Her lips curl up slightly. 

“When you are ready,” he caresses her chin. “You will share yourself with this Sesshomaru and when this,” he nods his head at the missing limb, “hurts less.” 

“So how does this work. Why am I feeling such strong urges?” 

“It’s a natural feeling after a bonding that won’t be satiated until after we are intimate. I won’t ask it of you now, not now, when you fear me so.” 

“I don’t fear you Sesshomaru.” 

He smiles lazily, gazing up at her face and tracing her chin with the back of a crooked finger. 

“I fear intimacy,” she says as she looks away from him. 

“I know,” he says quietly. “I wouldn’t hurt you.” 

Avalon shakes her head. “I don’t... think you would hurt me. That isn’t it.” 

“Tell me,” he finally feels like he can sit up. He folds his legs in and takes one of her hands in his. “Tell me what part scares you.” 

“I want to trust that I will be happy as your partner. I fear we may fight a lot. I fear that as you touch me, embrace me, take me. I will suddenly think I am in his clutches again. I fear that.” 

“Do men and women not fight where you are from? Mother nearly killed father once in argument. Whip around the neck, she ended on his back, with his head beneath her foot. As for intimacy,” he combs her hair with his claws, “it is why I won’t ask it of you now. The urges will build until we consummate this bond, but if it means creating distance between us, to stop myself I will.” 

“See, we humans fight but I don’t ever want to hurt you or you hurt me and your father left your mother.” A tear slips down her face. “Will you leave me?” 

“He didn’t leave her,” he chuckles. “She left him. They were never bound. She said it was because he was weak, emotional and annoying. He did bind himself to Izayoi.” 

“Why were they together then?” 

“She was in heat,” he says plainly, “and until I reached adolescence, they were both necessary to raise this Sesshomaru. After that,” he shrugs his shoulders. “She prefers her solitude.” 

“Inu-youkai are odd.” 

“Humans are odd,” he counters. 

“No just me. I’m foolish enough to follow a youkai.” Avalon shakes her head 

He exhales heavily. “We will do something about this embarrassment. It is an honor to be bound to this Sesshomaru. If you were not meant for this Sesshomaru, what I did may have saved your life, but without the bond between us.” He scoots closer holding out his arm again in invitation. “You will show pride in this bond.” 

“I will feel what I feel. You can’t change that with words.” she stays where she is 

“You will feel pride,” he argues frustrated. “Do you know how many women have laid themselves at the feet of this Sesshomaru in hopes that I would take them as a mate? Virgins? You will learn pride,” he speaks firmly. 

“Do you know how many women have laid at your feet? How many you have taken? Why would that make me feel any pride? I didn’t ask for this and I never slept with you.” 

“You will learn pride,” he repeats himself. “If not now, eventually. Compromise.” 

Avalon falls backwards onto the ground. “AHHHH! This Avalon is frustrated!” 

“Frustrating,” he leans over her, cocking his head to the side. “We could remove one of these, and see how frustrating life gets,” he jiggles her left arm. 

“Leave my arm alone. At least you are a male and get to be the head of the family.” 

“Strange customs in your world. Why would a man submit to a female?” He becomes pensive, then his mind flashes back to the battle, when he was fighting her, just before Naraku lost control. “You care for this Sesshomaru. You cried...why did you cry? The day we fought?” 

“No one submits. They are equals. I don’t understand why that’s so hard for you to understand.” Avalon shakes her head. “Yeah, I care about you. I didn’t want to hurt you. I need you to live. You are essential to killing Naraku. The sword I told you of, Bakusaiga. I wasn’t making it up. I had to break free. I was going to kill you and I didn’t want to do that.” 

“Mother submits to no one. She would like you,” he says softly. “I enjoy your...fire,” he leans his forehead against hers. “It is desirable, for the mate of this Sesshomaru to be strong, willful. Do you know what happens if you hold a butterfly too tightly?” He’s spellbound by her eyes, whispering. 

“You kill it.” 

“I will not take away what makes you, Avalon.” 

Avalon leans her head to brush her lips against his. “I’m not meant for a submissive role. I truly hope you can understand that I will stand up to you.” 

“You will not use that sword against this Sesshomaru again.” He rubs his chest where she stabbed him, “when you stand up.”

“As long as you aren’t using your claws or other demonic powers?” 

“I will not.” 

“Then I have no need for my sword.”

“You said he threatened Hikari?” He hadn’t forgotten that, staring stupidly into her eyes, wanting to taste her lips again. 

“He told me either I had to be his or she would take my place. If I were dead, she would be safe now.” Avalon’s head lowers, she whispers, “Sesshomaru if he knows I’m alive...she’s in danger. What am I going to do?” 

“Move her somewhere safe. I am unsure where. She is human.” 

Avalon looks up at him with tears in her eyes, her voice quivers, “I have to go back to him.” 

“No!” He tightens his hold around her waist. “We will move her and if there is nowhere safe enough, she will stay with this Sesshomaru until he is destroyed. I will not allow you to go back to him. You belong to this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon turns into Sesshomaru and wraps her arms around him. “I can’t let him have her. There isn’t anywhere safe. I have to go back. I don’t want to, but I’m so scared for her.” He can feel her tears fall on his shoulder. 

“No,” he says softly again, next to her ear. “She will travel with this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon shakes her head. She knew how Rin was captured. “You can’t be there all the time to protect her.”

“And you will no longer sacrifice yourself for her. You are powerful enough to stop him. She will be guarded by you or I. Avalon,” he picks up her chin and kisses her tenderly. “Submit and trust this Sesshomaru. Your fear clouds your reason.” 

Tears flow down her cheeks as she kisses him pressing her lips firmly against his. “I only pray you are right.” She leans her head on his shoulder as she continues to cry.

“We will leave soon. Do you need more to eat?” 

Avalon clings to him. “I can’t eat anything more.” 

He nods standing up, bringing her with him. Asking for things is not typically in his nature, but he can’t demand this of her either. “Are you comfortable...like this?” He wraps his arm around her waist firmly securing her to his naked side. “Or I can transform again.” 

Avalon considers their position. She can feel his bare skin against hers. She says, “This will be fine.” As much as the desire rages in her, the thought of Hikari being in danger was like a cold shower on her nerves. 

He runs the same hand up her back firmly, over her neck, to her cheek, turning her face to his. He breathes against her skin, resting his forehead against hers. “With this you will submit, you will tell this Sesshomaru when you are scared, uncomfortable, when the memories come, if they plague your sleep.” 

Avalon nods her head, tears slide down her cheeks. It was a demand she could live with. “I will let you know Sesshomaru.” 

“We go.” He secures her against his waist again, soaring into the air. His first stop is to retrieve Jaken who is aimlessly hunting for an arm. Then he lands in the clearing where his armor and Tenseiga are. He straps them quickly to his chest and waist, taking Avalon around the waist again. Just before he takes flight he asks, “where is the dragon?” 

“Um I think he is still in the village watching Hikari, unless you summoned him.”

He flies into the air, happily holding Avalon’s waist. “You will tell me everything about this Naraku,” he tells Avalon as they fly. “Everything, leave nothing out.” 

Avalon closes her eyes, trying to remember everything she learned while she was his captive. “Do you want to know his bedding preferences?” 

He tickles her side making her lurch forward in response. 

“I’ll take that as a no.” Avalon then launches into telling him how Naraku had found out about her and how he had plans to use her to kill his enemies. She tells him how he intends to have the sacred jewel and use it to fulfill his desires. She continues telling him more as it comes to her.

Occasionally he asks questions, gauging the strength of Naraku’s power, understanding that even his father’s sword cannot stand against the half-demon. 

Sesshomaru soars into the clouds with Avalon heading higher in the sky.

Avalon watches as a structure comes into view. “We are going to your mother’s place?”

“You need clothing,” he avoids landing on the steps. His mother isn’t high on his list of people to see. They fly down a hallway and land in his bedroom. He pulls out clothing from a trunk for himself, the same white haori with cherry blossoms on the shoulders and sleeves, with matching hakama. He removes the armor, throwing it into the corner of the room. He takes them to a corner in the room, his back to Avalon and loosens his blood covered hikama letting them fall. He takes the new pair and stares at them dejectedly. ‘This will be interesting.’ He leans his back against the wall, wearing only his fundoshi, deciding which is more humiliating, asking Avalon to help him clothe himself or Jaken until he becomes accustomed to using only one arm. 

Avalon watches him silently curious over what he is doing. When she sees him drop his hakama on the ground, she gets what he’s doing. “I’ll help if you wish.” She holds her hand out waiting for the new pair of Hakama. 

‘I have no pride left.’ He bends over and picks them up trying again to open them one handed only to become frustrated and throw them against the wall, refusing to face Avalon and only glaring at the wall. 

Avalon walks over to the thrown item picking it up. She walks over to him. She bends down holding them open for him. “You will get to doing this on your own. In the meantime. Just order me to do it.” She smiles. “You can think of it as me being submissive.” 

He sighs, glancing down at her and the open hikama and relents. If she thinks it submissive, it’s better than debasing himself with Jaken. He puts one leg in and then the other, bending down to help pull them up over his bare backside. The entire time his chest is burning for Avalon. 

Avalon stands to grab the hanjuban holding it open for him.

He slides his arm inside turning his back to her then tries to slide the small portion of his left arm into the other side. 

Avalon wraps her arms around him bringing the cloth around his middle. She slips out and comes to his front tying it up. She turns around to grab the hankimono and opens it for him. 

His eyes follow her as he slides his arm in again, gripping the sleeve to keep it from bunching as he pulls it down, then uses the same hand to guide the empty sleeve into the new garment. 

Avalon walks over to his front to straighten his juban and kimono. Then she looks down. “You use a very elaborate sash as an obi and I’m not entirely sure how to help with that.” 

His eyes aren’t on the obi, they are on her and the way she made him feel like he still had some pride left. He cups her chin firmly, then presses his mouth into hers, stepping forward until her back is against the wall, breathing heavily, while tasting the inside of her mouth. 

Avalon puts her hands on his chest as she feels her desire flare. She closes her eyes, moving her lips with his. When panic sets in suddenly, she starts pushing at his chest to get him away from. 

He backs away enough to allow their lips to separate, leaning one hand against the wall. “Forgive me.” He takes the obi turning to the door, already knowing he can’t tie this on his own. 

Avalon pants as she sees him turn away from her. “Sesshomaru wait!” She runs to be in front of him. “It’s not you. It’s me.” 

His chest is moving too quickly, if he doesn’t leave, he’ll do something he regrets. He swallows hard, unable to tell her how tempting she is and doesn’t want to scare her. He throws the obi over his left shoulder and reaches for her hand, squeezing her fingers affectionately, before leaving down the hallway to find Jaken. 

Avalon watches him leave as she feels tears well in her eyes. She wipes them away as she looks around marveling at the intricate paintings depicting a large white dog stomping on a human army. She moves about the room gazing at the large futon wondering how many females have lain with him. Her heart hurts for a moment. ‘I’m nothing to him.’ She shakes her head and keeps looking about. There are weapons on the walls. She looks at each one, some she recognizes others, she hasn’t a clue about. She hears the door open behind her. She turns around and sees Sesshomaru walk in. 

He holds a sea-green kimono with silver embroidery that runs up the hip lines and a peach obi, beneath it is a clean Juban. He hands them to her without speaking and faces the wall. 

Avalon takes and strips off the shredded clothing. She puts on the juban and then the kimono followed by the obi. “Thanks. So… you still live with your mom, huh?” 

“Is this a problem? Are you modest?” 

“Yeah. I’m dressed.” 

He turns around and saunters to her, holding out his hand. 

Avalon takes his offered hand. Looking up at him questioningly. 

He cups her chin again, this time breathing deeply of the scent of her cheeks. His nose slides into her hair. “You did not disappoint this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon nods her head. Not completely sure what to say to that. “So...um...how many women have graced this room?” 

He releases her. “Many. I did not keep count.” 

“Do you remember their faces?” 

“The first one,” he says blankly, “had long silver hair, no moon but with single stripes along the cheeks. The ones after?” He shrugs his shoulders. “The virgins,” he thinks, trying to remember their faces, there was something invigorating about deflowering inu-youkai maidens. “One had a moon like mine, only it was lavender, another cried, and then wanted more. Should I continue?” 

“No. I just wonder if you will remember me. These desires will overcome me, I’m sure and I’m only human. I will die in the blink of an eye,” tears well in her eyes, “for you. Then you will have more I’m sure and will you forget me? Will I be a faceless lover?” 

He dares to step closer to her, wiping the tears off her cheeks, he brings her to stand in front of a mirror. He traces her chin, the curve of her neck and sniffs the back of her head, relishing her scent. “You will know many years with this Sesshomaru. This face will be memorized. Did you not notice I chose this cloth for the color of your eyes, the silver for the flecks of color in them. The peach to match your delicate features. I do not love you, Avalon. I don’t know if this Sesshomaru is capable of such a feeling, but there will be centuries to uncover it.” 

Avalon’s eyes widen as she whispers, “Centuries?” 

“You will age as I age.” He turns her in his arm. “You wish this Sesshomaru to love you. You will give me time to develop this emotion. Does it satisfy you to know that I am very fond of you?” 

Avalon looks up into his eyes. “It helps knowing that and I guess we have a lot of time to see what happens.” She rests her head on his shoulder. While hugging him. 

“Do you need anything else before we leave?” 

“I don’t think so.” 

“Then we should leave quickly,” he says softly in her ear. 

Avalon lifts her head and unwinds her arms from around his shoulders. “Then let's go. We have to get to Hikari.” 

He rubs his knuckles against her cheeks to dry her tears. As they leave, he wonders if this would be the best place to leave Hikari. Most do not know about this place. 

Jaken knocks on the shoji door, “Sesshomaru-sama?” 

Sesshomaru growls annoyed, placing a soft kiss on Avalon’s forehead. “We go,” he opens the door, glaring at Jaken. 

Avalon follows Sesshomaru out the door as Jaken looks on. “Oh.” he walks following Avalon then he gets ahead of her. “Know your place onna.” he says snubbly 

Sesshomaru reaches behind him and thrusts Jaken neck first into the wall. “You are familiar with the bonds of my kind?” 

Jaken's eyes bulge out of his head, fear and surprise struggling for air, “Hai Sesshomaru-sama.” 

Sesshomaru grabs Avalon around the waist, pressing her against the wall saying quietly, “control your fear.” He presses his lips into hers, hitching one of her legs around his waist, purposely letting his eyes slide back at Jaken. 

Avalon kisses him and holds onto him while keeping her eyes open. 

Jaken’s mouth drops open. “You have bed her!?” 

Sesshomaru whips Jaken in the face. “Silence!” he yells at him and then backs away slowly from Avalon, pecking her one last time. “Avalon-sama. You will call her Avalon-sama.” He tugs on Avalon’s fingers, bringing her to walk next to him. 

“Hai my Lord and Lady.” He gets up to trail behind them.

Avalon can’t help but smile. She goes to whisper in Sesshomaru’s ear “Say that again please. It was thrilling to hear.” She backs away saying loudly, “Sesshomaru-sama.” 

“Which part?” he says slyly. “The part where I threw him against the wall, or the part where he is to refer to you as Avalon-sama?” 

Avalon grins from ear to ear. “My name coming from your lips with such honorifics.” She pushes her lips to his and then rests her head on his shoulder as they walk and she holds his arm. 

“You torment this Sesshomaru,” he says as they reach the stairs. He hooks his arm around her waist, waiting for her permission to pull her closer. 

Avalon moves close to wrap her arms around him, plastering her body against his. 

He smirks at her proudly whispering next to her ear, “I smell what you are thinking.” 

“Thinking what am I thinking?” she says indignantly. 

He only chuckles as he free falls out of the castle to see if he can get her to cling tighter as they fall through the clouds and the sky, gravity sending them plummeting. 

Avalon screams so loudly and with a high ringing pitch as she clings to him harder. 

He rolls onto his back, slowing their descent, with her on his chest, staring into her eyes as they fly high above the banks of a river. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment and Kudo please let us know what you think!


	21. Completion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sesshomaru and Avalon retrieve Hikari but things aren't so simple between them.

Avalon looks down at Sesshomaru as Jaken clings desperately to his mokomoko. Her eyes spark with excitement. She wasn’t scared of the rapid descent. It was exhilarating. “Can we do that again?” She beams down at him. 

He flies higher into the sky without speaking, until they are above the clouds and the air is thinner. This time, he rolls in circles, throwing her off balance and then drops her by herself while Jaken screams as Sesshomaru dashes after her. 

Avalon eyes widen slightly, in fear that Sesshomaru intends to kill her. She screams with fear as she spreads her arms out to slow her falling as much as possible while hoping water might be below her. She closes her eyes, praying he saves her. 

He catches her around the waist, pressing his stomach into her back, then brings them up into a steep incline while burying his nose into her neck. He spins as they climb in altitude, then stops, holding her vertically. He motions with his head below, wondering if she wants another go. 

“Don’t you dare drop me again,” she hisses as her fingers cling to his arm leaving indents. 

“Mmh,” he leans next to her ear, whispering seductively, “wrap your legs around my waist.” 

Avalon lifts her eyebrow but does as he asks, wrapping her legs around his waist. 

He lets gravity take them again as he holds her around the waist. 

Avalon smiles feeling the air rush by and her stomach rises as they plunge towards the ground. Her legs hold him firmly using her strong muscles. “This is great!” 

He stops their descent in time for the spray of the river to splash them as the rapids rush passed jagged rocks. Behind, Jaken flaps weakly against Sesshomaru’s mokomoko, looking greener than usual. “No more Sesshomaru-sama...please!” 

He ignores the imps whines, purposely flying with Avalon beneath him, her legs tightly wrapped around his waist. He wonders how much of what is going on in his hakama she feels. He leans his mouth closer to hers, inviting her to kiss him. 

Avalon can feel the large bulge between her legs but she is enjoying the ride so much she is choosing to ignore it. She brushes her lips with his as she wraps her hands around his neck, using her back muscles to be parallel to him. 

He opens his mouth wider against hers, encouraging her to do the same. He keeps an eye on the river as they fly slowly, ignoring Jaken’s protests from behind him. His hand dips lower, pushing her thighs more tightly into his hips. His bulge digs into her core, aching for release. 

Avalon breaks the kiss and lets her back sink backwards. “Sesshomaru?” she says forlornly, looking away from him. 

“One day,” he whispers in her ears, bringing them vertical again and helps her manoeuvre back to his side, “you will not fear my touch.” His eyes focus forward as he hastens their speed. He doesn’t know if Naraku knows Avalon is not dead or if Hikari is already in his grasp. He flies until the wind whips against them and he sees spots in his vision. 

Avalon closes her eyes and leans into his chest protecting her face from the wind as she holds onto him. She shakes her head sadly. ‘I don’t fear your touch, Sesshomaru. I wish you could understand.’ 

Sesshomaru soars over the village, landing in front of the hut Hikari lives in. It’s night by the time they arrive. Sesshomaru releases Avalon and she rushes into the hut. “Hikari!” Avalon’s voice trembles with joy.

Her entrance wakes a baby that is sleeping on the floor and one of the other children. They both start crying. Hikari rushes to pick up the baby and kneels over the toddler shushing him. “Good job Avalon,” she narrows her eyes at her and refuses to say more. 

Sesshomaru remains outside of the hut. “Better to not get involved,” Jaken says as if he is reading Sesshomaru’s mind. 

Avalon lowers her voice. She walks over to the toddler. “More orphans?” she says sadly. 

“I think they’re brothers, not that family means anything to you.” She rocks the baby against her shoulder and picks up a horn and a bladder of goat milk for the baby. “Kaede-sama found them in the woods. Their parents are dead. Not that you care. Why are you here?” 

“I’m here for you. I’ve missed you terribly.” 

“Liar,” she plops down indian style to feed the baby. “Come on, open your mouth.” The baby fought the horn in its mouth. “He does this every time.” 

“Allow me to try?” Avalon opens her arms for the baby.

“You don’t have milk in your breasts, what are you going to do?” Hikari rolls her eyes. “You need to eat akanbo (baby). He doesn’t have a name.” 

“I wasn’t going to breastfeed him Hikari.” Avalon shakes her head. “But I have fed a baby before.” 

Hikari hands the baby over exasperated. “Fine. Then you can leave.” 

Avalon holds the baby against her chest allowing the infant to rest on her breast. The baby starts nudging into her kimono trying to get to her breast. “The milk please?” Avalon holds out her hand. 

Hikari hands her the horn and runs out of the hut to find Sesshomaru leaning against a tree. “I knew it…” she removes the blade he gave her and throws it at his heart. 

He catches it in hand just before it pierces his chest, then tosses it on the ground in front of her feet. Hikari screams and attacks him. 

Avalon rushes out of the hut with the baby in her arms, hearing Hikari’s scream. She sees Hikari leaping at Sesshomaru. Avalon shakes her head and turns back into the hut grabbing the milk and then heads outside again to watch. 

She smirks at Sesshomaru, while holding the baby like she is breastfeeding but using the horn for the infant to suck on. ‘I need to ask Kagome for a few baby bottles.’ 

Hikari grabs the knife off the ground and twirls, trying to strike Sesshomaru in the neck. He slaps her wrist down as she tries to kick him in his groin. “You made her your whore!” she screams at him. “Is that why she didn’t come back!?” 

He loses his patience with the girl’s game and slaps her across the face hard enough to knock her down and pins her down with his knee.

“Let me go!!!!” 

Avalon screams, “Let her go Sesshomaru. She doesn’t know!” She runs with the baby in her hands to get to Hikari. Just then Inuyasha leaps onto the scene. He sees Sesshomaru pinning Hikari and a human woman with a baby rushing at Sesshomaru. 

Inuyasha jumps in front of Avalon. Drawing his sword, he points it at Sesshomaru. “Let her go, Sesshomaru!”

Avalon drops the horn and summons her blade ready to take action if need be. She moves the baby to her hip as she holds the sword. “Inuyasha back down now!” 

Sesshomaru snorts in discontent at Inuyasha. “Always troubling yourself where you don’t belong.” He lashes out with his whip, keeping Hikari pinned down as Inuyasha is forced to dodge the attack. “Were you called a whore for what was done to you?” he snarls at Hikari.

“You didn’t rape her!” She struggles against him. “Let me go!” 

“Inuyasha you should leave.” Avalon’s tone is even, “Sesshomaru you need to back down.” 

Inuyashsa turns to look at the woman he thought was no more than a mother fighting for her children. “I’m not going anywhere. Are you crazy? He’s a killer and how do you know his name?”

“Inuyasha you are making things worse. I can’t deal with both of you.” Avalon pushes past Inuyasha, turning her back on him. “Sesshomaru, this isn’t helping.” 

“Silence!” he bellows at Avalon. “You will close your mouth,” he says to Hikari on the verge of wanting to kill her. “You know nothing.” 

“I know you’re an evil jerk! And she’s a whore!” She pushes against his knee, unable to move him.

Avalon watches as things go from bad to worse. “Please don’t harm her Sesshomaru! She doesn’t know and I love her!”

Inuyasha grabs Avalon’s shoulder and pushes her out of the way. “You hear that you bastard. She loves the kid.” He points his sword at him. “You're not welcome here. I’ll kill you if you harm that girl.” 

Avalon uses her body to keep the baby safe. She runs to put the crying baby back in the hut and then rushes back out. 

“No you don’t!” Hikari screams, her cheeks stained with tears. “You left me just to have sex with him!” She throws a punch at his side that jars her wrist and makes her cry in pain.

Avalon cries as she rushes past Inuyasha again. “That’s not what happened Hikari. I never had sex with Sesshomaru.” 

Inuyasha’s ears pull back against his head. He did not want to hear about having sex with his half-brother. 

“Then why are you with him? Get off of me!” She scratches at his knee with the wrist that doesn’t hurt. Jaken Jr. runs out of the hut and bites on Sesshomaru’s feet. He slaps the puppy off, making it whine. “No!” Hikari cries.

“Hikari, stop fighting and listen! It’s the only way! I can’t overpower Sesshomaru and Inuyasha shouldn’t try. It’s a big mess and we don’t have time for it. Please, listen to me for once.” 

Sesshomaru leans over Hikari. “You are not worth the protection of this Sesshomaru. I should let him have you.” He grabs Hikari by the wrist, about to hover in the air. 

“SESSHOMARU RELEASE HER,” Avalon calls her sword, ready to strike. “I will not hold back trying to stop you.” Avalon’s eyes alight with reiki. She grinds her teeth. “I DIDN’T ENDURE MONTHS OF TORTURE TO LET SOMETHING HAPPEN TO HER NOW!”

Inuyasha backs up feeling the crackle of reiki flowing in the air. His sword reverts back to the rusty dull blade. He looks down at it confused. 

Sesshomaru throws Hikari onto the ground face first, cutting her lip and rushes Inuyasha with his arm extended, mysting green. 

Avalon’s anger drops and she rushes to Hikari to check on her. 

Inuyasha dodges Sesshomaru’s attack just barely before turning around to face Sesshomaru. “I told you, if you hurt the girl, I’d kill you!” He charges Sesshomaru recklessly.

Hikari waits until Avalon is close enough, then grabs a rock, slamming it into her head, making her bleed. “Liar! Everything you said is a lie!”

Avalon brings a hand up to her head where Hikari stuck her. The blood flow slows, then stops as she holds her head as the wound closes. Avalon is stunned that her wound healed so quickly. She backs up, feeling slightly betrayed by the young lady she thinks of as a sister. Avalon calls gently, “I’m not lying.”

Sesshomaru slams his whip against Inuyasha’s face, sending the hanyou flying, landing on his clawed feet.

Inuyasha slides backwards then leaps again at Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru and Inuyasha continue battling behind them, taunting each other.

“Then where were you!” Hikari stands up, still holding the rock in her hand.

“I was held captive Hikari. That yokai I feared so much, he found me.” Avalon cries. “He threatened to hurt you if I didn’t do what he said. I couldn’t leave until now. I’m so scared for you Hikari.” 

Hikari’s eyes widen and she drops the rock, blinking back her sorrow. “What did he make you do?” A part of her doesn’t need to ask. She already knows. 

“Hikari I don’t want to...” Her lips tremble. “I’m so ashamed. It was horrible but I did it to protect you.” Avalon’s head and shoulders slump.

Shewalks weakly to Avalon and hugs her around the shoulders. “Onesan.”

Avalon wraps her arms around Hikari crying into her shoulder. “I’m so sorry.” She unwraps her arms and gets up to look over at the two inu-youkai fighting and calls, “Hey Inuyasha! Where is Kagome?”

Inuyasha’s head snaps over to Avalon just ducking a blow from Sesshomaru. “If she’s in the future. She might need your help.”

“What?” Inuyasha is stunned by what this strange woman is saying, leaving himself open. 

Sesshomaru slams his claws satisfyingly into Inuyasha’s middle. 

Avalon rushes over to them. She places herself in front of Inuyasha. “Sesshomaru that’s enough. We didn’t come here to fight your brother.” She puts up a barrier around herself and Inuyasha. Avalon looks over at Inuyasha and sees him getting up. She places her hand on his stomach, glad to see that it wasn’t as bad as it looked. “That was a cheap shot. I was distracting him.” 

“I’ve never considered this hanyou my brother. Back away,” he growls at Avalon coming in for another blow.

“Ummmmm...no.” Avalon changes the dimensions of the barrier encircling her and Sesshomaru. “You better go Inuyasha, Kagome needs you.”

Inuyasha nods his head. “Right.” He leaps off and away. Avalon stands her ground looking at him innocently.

“That was not submission.” He plods away from her, heading for the forest, equally annoyed and aroused by her stubbornness. 

Avalon shrugs her shoulders and follows him into the forest. “Sesshomaru you wouldn’t talk, so I had to take action.” She leaps around, fluttering about him. 

“Leave me,” he says firmly, furious with her disrespect. His shoulder flares, sending him to his knees in pain from his missing arm. He pants gripping it tightly, bearing his teeth. 

“Sesshomaru!” Avalon rushes over to him looking about for more of the herbs she knows that helps. 

“I said leave me!” he bellows at her threateningly, leaning against a tree for stability. 

“Sesshomaru.” She says softly not sure what to do. She stops her movements and looks down. “I’m sorry.” 

He uses the trunk as leverage to force himself off the ground, panting heavily from the pain. “Get out of my sight,” he says as he slides back down the trunk, unable to escape the stabbing pain in his stump. 

Avalon’s eyes tear up as she runs from him. She runs back towards the hut where Hikari is. ‘Why did he have to be such a stubborn ass?’ 

Sesshomaru makes his way deeper into the forest, finding a tree to rest under, while the waves of pain rack his body. ‘I will not whine like a dog,’ he tells himself as it eats away at his consciousness. 

Avalon rubs her eyes clearing the tears away. ‘He needs me whether he wants it or not.’ She gets out of the hut and starts looking for the herbs that help. She finds them in the garden and picks some stuffing them in her sleeve. She returns to where she last saw him. Looking around for him and screams, “YOU STUBBORN JERK!” She walks deeper in looking for him. 

He’s in too much pain to move, even breathing hurts. ‘A few more days,’ he tells himself firmly, trying to push the pain from his mind. He grips the stump with his palm, attempting to massage the pain away. The bandages have come loose. He writhes on the forest floor, his face red and his skin hot again. 

Avalon hears the rustling in the forest and follows the sound. She finds him on the ground. “Sesshomaru!” She rushes to him and pushes on the stump with one hand while digging the herbs out. “Here take these.” She pushes them to his clenched teeth. 

He can’t open his mouth, the pain radiates from the stump into his jaw. He can smell her. She smells like comfort, but the world is fading in and out of focus. 

Avalon purses her lips as his teeth stay locked. She takes the herbs in her mouth chewing them then she places her lips over his letting the juice drip through his clenched teeth. She holds down on the stump trying to ease the pain as best she can. ‘Maybe next time you will accept my help before you are a mess.’ 

The familiar bitter liquid drips into his throat. He swallows it, reaching a shaking hand out for her. He can feel the pressure on the stump, easing the pain. “Where are...you?” he mutters out weakly, the fever taking him. It was too soon to battle again. 

Avalon leans her body on him giving him as much contact as she can while chewing more of the herbs. She brings her lips to his and allows the liquid to flow between them, before spitting the leaves out. “I’m right here Sesshomaru. I’m right here.” 

Hikari comes out from the bushes, her eyes wide in shock. She can see Sesshomaru shaking, nearly convulsing and Avalon wrapped around him, while he clings to her. “What’s wrong with him?” Hikari runs up with Jaken Jr. trailing behind her. The puppy is all gangly legs now.

He reaches out with his arm for Avalon and digs his nose into her skin. ‘I can smell you.’ Her scent is like an anesthetic to the pain. “Stay,” he forces the word out through chattering teeth. 

“I’m here.” Avalon says, still holding him tightly. “It’s a long story, Hikarki.” 

Hikari starts rolling up the empty sleeve, her eyes bulging, seeing what Avalon is gripping. “What happened? Where’s his arm? These bandages are loose.” She tugs them off completely. “And tattered...should I get new ones? I can bring new ones.” 

“Umm...Inuyasha took his arm and yes new bandages would be great.” 

“Why is he holding you?” Hikari asks suspiciously. “I thought you said you wouldn’t seek him out again?” 

“Avalon,” the name nearly comes out as a whimper from Sesshomaru’s lips. 

Avalon’s head dips down to lay against him. “I didn’t seek him out, Hikari. I nearly killed him and he nearly killed me. Well, let's say we both owe each other our lives. The bandages?” 

Hikari nods, running off into the forest, back to the hut. 

Sesshomaru swallows harshly, trying to get ahead of the pain. Rest, he needs to rest, but he can barely speak. He pulls himself tighter into her body, sweating, his temperature rising. 

Avalon can feel his body temperature rising. ‘Shit’. She releases his stump to reach into her sleeve for more of the herb. Bringing it to her lips, she chews it up. She maneuvers her lips to his to allow the liquid to pass into his mouth and places her hand back on the stump putting pressure on it. She spits the rest of the leaf pulp out.

Hikari comes back with the baby tied to her front and a wad of bandages in her hands. She gives them to Avalon and asks, “What can I do? He’s still a jerk...” 

“Yeah, I can’t argue that.” Avalon grabs the bandages, extracting herself from Sesshomaru to tie them around his stump. “Water and a fire would be good. He has a fever.” 

“I can get that. Why is he like this?” Hikari reaches out to touch his brow only for Sesshomaru to lash out, swiping his claws at her. She cringes, waiting for the blow to fall. 

Avalon instantly erects a barrier between his claws and Hikari. “Hikari, he is a youkai, do not be foolish enough to approach when one is injured. He seeks me out because he knows my scent well and it brings him comfort. I’m sorry he lashed out at you. Please grab what I asked for?” 

She nods and leaves, running back to her home with her dog following her. 

Sesshomaru reaches out for Avalon again, searching for her blindly in the haze of his fever. “Avalon,” he tries to pull himself closer to her, but can’t. 

Avalon lowers her body to cover him. Giving him as much contact as she can. “I’m here, I’m here,” she cooes to him while running her fingers through his hair. 

His nose instinctively works it’s way into her neck, puffing air against her skin. He grips her back with his arm and stutters out, “t...tired…” 

Avalon bites her bottom lip. She forces Reiki into her limbs, giving her strength to lift him. She extracts herself from his hold and leans over, picking him up bridal style to carry him back to the village. ‘It's safer in the village. I can keep an eye on Hikari too.’ 

Avalon walks to Hikari’s hut and gently places him on the side. She doesn’t want to bring him inside in case he lashes out at the children or Hikari. She lays down in front of Sesshomaru, scooching back to allow him to grab her and bring her close to his chest and stomach. “Sleep Sesshomaru. I’ll keep us safe.” 

“Onna!” Jaken comes running. “What did you do to him!?” 

“Quiet Jaken-sama,” Hikari leaves the hut with a hot kettle and a flint stone. “Avalon?” She sets them down feet away from where Avalon is lying, entangled in Sesshomaru’s grip to avoid getting hit by him again. Her eyes start to tear up. “You left me to go back to him.” She covers her eyes sobbing.

“You made him overexert himself with that ridiculous flying!” Jaken joins the sobbing. 

Sesshomaru’s hand moves to cover one of his ears, attempting to hide his face in Avalon’s neck again. ‘Cantelope, Honeydew,’ he knows he is safe. ‘Scent,’ he thinks weakly, barely able to stay awake. 

“Quiet Jaken,” Avalon hisses. “He overexerted himself fighting with his brother.” Avalon shakes her head. “Hikari I did not leave you to go to Sesshomaru. I have never lied to you.” Her head sinks to the ground. “I need to be close to protect both of you. I don’t know how long until that youkai will come looking for me or you and I wasn’t going to be laying in the forest with him while something happens to you.” 

“No, you’re just laying with him!” Hikari’s eyes narrow and she inches forward cautiously. “You got married didn’t you? Are you pregnant? Why him?” 

Avalon sighs. “Not married, bonded. Not pregnant, never had sex with him. It wasn’t a choice, Hikari. I was dying and he saved my life but he bonded himself to me accidentally. AHHHHH!” 

“Because you tried to kill him!” Jaken lashes out at Avalon verbally. “This is what you wanted all along! Onna!” 

Sesshomaru’s hand flies out again, sending the whip flying around them. 

Hikari squeaks running out of the way. Jaken flings himself onto the ground as it circles blindly in the air. “T...tired,” Sesshomaru grits out between his teeth, striking blindly with the whip. 

Avalon puts a barrier around them to contain his lashing out. “Will you be quiet,  you toad? And it’s Avalon-sama to you,” she hisses. “It’s safe Hikari. He won’t be able to strike out of the barrier.” 

“Maybe we should let him rest,” Hikari offers and goes to Jaken. “Want to come inside?” 

He grumbles and follows. 

Sesshomaru breathes in the quiet, his arm slowly returning to wrap around Avalon’s waist. “Avalon,” he whispers, his lips brushing against her neck. “Stay.” 

Avalon shakes her head at him. ‘You are too much Sesshomaru.’ She whispers, “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere, go to sleep.” Avalon plans to stay up all night keeping watch so he can rest but she accidently falls asleep.

She wakes up as the sun rises and rays creep into her eyes. She squeezes her eyes shut tighter then opens them blinking and goes to stretch her back, then feels an arm around her stomach, noticing the warmth and the steady rise and fall of a chest behind her. 

Fear grips her. The arm tightens and a voice whispers next to her ear, “Shh. You're safe.” He rubs her back to soothe her. He groans, not recognizing his surroundings. “What happened?” 

Avalon relaxes, his voice isn’t her captor’s. She turns her head around to look at him. “Sesshomaru, you were in pain and I moved you over here, so I could keep an eye on you and Hikari.” 

He breathes heavily touching her stomach and dipping his nose into her neck again. The yearning is stronger. His need. “You’re scared.” He opens his eyes, squinting from the sun. “Nightmares?” 

“I was scared but not from a nightmare. I didn’t realize it was you holding me. I feared it was him,” her voice trails off. 

His teeth graze against her neck, then pull back abruptly. He brings himself off her chest feeling hard and heavy all at once. He leans against the hut next to her, resting his head against her shoulder. ‘This must be so difficult for her.’ 

“Ah.” Avalon’s head lays down. “I’m sorry.” Her heart hurts. She hates how messed up her head is. 

His middle finger traces opulent circles around her waist, up to her ribs and then down her hips. His lips press into her neck again. The waiting is becoming too difficult and he worries the contact will drive her to fear. “Are you still scared?” His lips brush against the skin of her neck as he speaks. 

Avalon answers as honestly as she can, “I’m not scared of you.” 

He threads his hand into her hair, claws raking down the black strands, to the bottom where they dangle down to her knees. They tingle against her scalp, combing her hair smooth. He shifts his hips, trying to force himself back down. This is torment. 

Avalon relaxes into his touch leaning back against him. She turns her head as his hand smooths her hair along her back. She turns her entire body to let her head rest on his shoulder and her hand to rest over his side. Her breath ghosts over his chin and neck. 

He glances down at her, tilting his head. His knuckles brush up her neck, then along her chin. “We will leave today,” he says, leaning closer to her lips. 

“Alright. I just need to talk to Kaede to let her know that I’m taking Hikari.” 

He nods, running his nose seductively over her lips, her nose, circling her eyes and breathing her scent in. “Cantaloupe and Honeydew,” he mutters. 

Avalon blinks. ‘Is he hungry for melons?’ She is very confused. “Are you hungry?” 

His eyes fill with fire, but are lined in stress and exhaustion. “I hunger for what I can’t have.” He traces her collar bone with the pads of his fingers. 

Avalon’s right hand catches his. She watches his face closely and moves slowly to brush her lips against Sesshomaru’s. 

He responds, threading his fingers through her hair by the base of her neck, drinking from her lips. The kiss lingers until his hand lowers and he pulls back. “It should end with that,” he pants, trying to free himself of her, sitting up. Any more and he wouldn’t be able to stop. He forces his eyes shut risking the subject. “I wouldn’t cause pain.” 

Avalon is confused by his sudden want to leave. Her desire for him is raging within her. She keeps her body resting against his. “What pain?” 

“Here,” he rests his hand at the material just above the apex of her womanhood, breathing heavily. He shakes his head to clear it. “I need release.” Spending an entire night in her arms has sent his need from manageable to throbbing. 

Avalon becomes slightly indignant. “So do I.” 

He closes his eyes, grateful at her admission. He stands up, holding out his hand for her to take. 

Avalon reaches her hand out to him, letting him lift her. 

He pulls her to his side, holding her tightly, then flies vertically into the air, hovering over the forest and the hut. “Did you have a dream?...What did you want for the first time?” His heart is racing as he searches for a more secluded area to take them. 

“I always pictured it would be after the wedding.” She chuckles dryly 

He sees a field with lush grass and high camaphor trees in the distance, far enough from the village to give them privacy, but close enough he will be able to hear the hut. He sets her down, releasing her roughly, then backs away pacing, furiously. The ache is nearly as bad as the fever that overtook him the night before. “You must be ready.” He is losing control. He tries to focus on the gait of his steps, not on Avalon. 

“I am not sure if I’m ready. But I am ready to try,” Avalon says just above a whisper. As she watches him pace, she wonders if he might turn on her. Slight fear rises at his agitated state. 

He nods his head turning his back to breathe deeply. “You will tell me to stop...make a barrier, if it becomes too much. With this you will submit to this Sesshomuaru.” He begins untying his obi to free his haori. 

Avalon crosses her arms. “Stop saying submit. It only agitates me.” 

“Then learn to practice humility. You will promise to protect yourself. I am...not myself.” He drops his haori on the ground and removes his underlayer. 

Avalon uncrosses her arms. “I would have done it without you commanding me. I don’t want you hurting me,” she adds in a gentler voice, “and I don’t think you want to hurt me.” 

“Stubborn onna, you will have none of me, until you make this promise humbly. You don’t understand...the way this rages.” He drops his hakama and kicks his shoes off, still refusing to face her. 

Avalon walks over to him and wraps her arms around his naked back and whispers in his ear, “I promise to protect myself from you, if I am endangered by you.” She dips her head to kiss along his neck. 

He loosens himself from her embrace, trying to douse the agitated flames within him. “Not like this.” He lays down on his back and closes his eyes. “You may explore this Sesshomaru and I will not touch you until you are ready. Remove your clothes.” 

Avalon nods her head and starts undoing her obi, letting it drop. Then she pulls the ties on her kimono and slides it off herself. She pulls the ties for her juban but stops. She lets her hands linger on the ties of the juban, nervous and excited by what she is about to do. Fear pokes at the back of her mind. ‘Can I do this without freaking out? I’m with Sesshomaru not Naraku. I’ll leave it on.’ She lets her hands drop from the ties. 

He cracks an eye open wanting to peek at her beauty. “This Sesshomaru will see your beauty.” But then he smells the nerves behind the excitement he senses from her. ‘The fear of a virgin.’ He relaxes onto his side and tells her, “Remove the Juban.” 

“I thought your eyes were closed?” ‘Please don’t make me tell you why I want it on. It’s so embarrassing, I just don’t want to panic.’ 

“Are you embarrassed?” He sits up, running a hand up her calf to the dip in the back of her knee, examining the muscles in her legs. Even that mild action was making him harder. “Why hide?” 

“If you want it off so bad, you take it off.” 

He smirks and slices through the material, tearing it off her shoulders. 

She gasps and steps back a step. Her heartbeat increases slightly as she fears she might start panicking being bare before him. 

“What is this?” his voice rasps as he speaks. He sits up abruptly, finding a scar that runs the length of her collarbone down to her pelvic area. He had forgotten about seeing it the day she nearly killed him. “It was not on your body before.” And then his eyes search hers, hearing the rapid rate of her heart, the spike of her fear in her scent and the small tremble of her fingers. “When did this happen?” 

Avalon gulps looking away, shame and fear gripping her. “When...when...he…” she swallows thickly “It’s not important,” she whispers. 

He presses his nose into her stomach breathing heavily with arousal and concern. He holds the small of her back, kissing the scar tenderly from the bottom near her curls up to her navel, then glances up at her again. “He did this to you?” He can’t tear his eyes away from it. “This is Naraku’s mark.” 

Avalon’s lip trembles, unable to form words, but she nods once as a single tear falls from her right eye. 

His fingers spread out over her stomach, tracing the line with his thumb. “Let me take it off.” He kisses the line lower, stopping at her pelvis. “I will remove his mark from you.”

“You...can do that?” she asks with a hint of hope in her voice. 

He stands up, twining his fingers into her hair, bringing her lips to his. “It will hurt. I will open it, our bond will seal it without leaving a scar.” He nuzzles her nose, taking in her breath. “It will hurt,” he warns her again, not wanting to cause her more pain that she has already experienced. 

“I don’t care about physical pain.” She kisses his lips, trembling slightly. “Please,” she whispers against his lips nearly begging for the scar to be removed. It was a constant physical reminder of her imprisonment. 

He nods and brings the tip of his claw up to her neck where it begins. He positions his left side against her body, wishing he had his other arm to hold her. “I’m sorry,” he says, digging it into her skin, tracing the track of the scar, while leaning his left side into her body. He follows the line down between her breasts, constantly glancing at her eyes. 

A small smiling graces her lips as he cuts along the scar. She holds his shoulders and shakes but she doesn’t move or back away. ‘One less thing to remember him by.’ 

Sesshomaru follows the line as it curves around her stomach and stops at her pelvis. “Trust me,” he croons in her ear, his mouth covers the injury and he traces the line again, this time dipping his tongue into the battered flesh to soothe the pain and speed the healing. He slides his fingers down her bare back and then kneels, pulling her abdomen tighter into his mouth as he spends more time on the base of the injury. “You will heal like this Sesshomaru now. No more scars.” He pecks her navel, searching her eyes. “Do not fear me, this between us. I can taste it on your skin. You’re afraid.” 

“I don’t fear you,” she says honestly. ‘I’m just afraid I’ll panic.’ Avalon eyes drift to her scar the skin pulls together, first angry red, then deep pink, fading to light pink and finally nothing but smooth skin. Avalon’s breath hitches. “Thank you,” she says with awe, gratitude, and wonder. 

Sesshomaru rises and kisses her tenderly again. “What do you fear?” He could taste it on her tongue, the roof of her mouth and the tender skin of her lips. “I will be gentle.” ‘Did he hurt her? Did he make her cry in pain?’ 

“It’s nothing,” she says quickly and dismissively. 

He rests his forehead against hers, accepting her lie. “Do you want me to lie down again?” He traces the curve of her jaw, the shell of her ear and kisses her deeply, burying his tongue in her cavern, tasting her mouth fully. ‘I should have searched for you.’ 

“Hai, if you want,” she says nervously. 

“It is not what this Sesshomaru wants,” he says huskily and quietly. “It is what you want, Avalon.” 

“Please lay down?” she asks in a whisper as her heart rate increases with fear. 

He nods, breathing slowly. He brings her knuckles up to his mouth, gingerly holding them against his mouth. “You may ask to stop. It doesn’t matter when, Avalon,” he says her name as if he is speaking of holiness. “I will stop.” 

“Alright,” she says. “I want to keep going for now,” she says looking him in the eyes, taking deep and steady breaths to calm herself. 

He lays down on the tall grass as a gust of wind blows past them, tossing her hair in the wind, making her more beautiful than she already was. “You are beautiful,” he gazes at her in adoration, wondering where the warm feelings in his heart were coming from. “Turn,” he screws his cheeks tight to keep from smiling. “I want to see all of you.” 

Avalon breathes a sigh and then turns with her hands out, slowly letting him see her naked form. She stops once she is facing him again. She says gently, “Happy?” 

“Very happy,” he echoes her tone. “Female Inu-youkai are tender… soft.” He runs his hand up her calf again, daring to go higher to her hips, just below her bottom, wondering what her ass felt like. She was contoured, sculpted. “Not firm, like this.” He smiles laying onto his back, closing his eyes. “A beauty deserving of this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon smiles at his compliment. She sits next to him and takes a finger to his forehead, tracing the moon, marveling at the smooth texture knowing he was born with it. Her hand moves along his nose and along his cheek. She smooths the pad of her finger over his lips. “Is it okay, that I’m touching you like this now?” 

He nods, then cups her face. “I do not lie.” His thumb traces the circles under her eyes. “I will give you what you should have had. I…” he stops short of admitting the guilt that is still eating at him and the discomfort, knowing pain was all she had ever experienced sexually. “Continue,” he whispers, barely audible.

Avalon runs her hand down his neck and leans down to sniff along it. “You know you smell like fresh rain to me?” 

“Cantaloupe, cream and Honeydew.” He digs his claws into the grass to keep from touching her. His chest rises and falls heavily, accentuating the notches of his abs. 

Avalon turns and sniffs her shoulder shrugging, she couldn’t smell it. She brings her hands down along his chest and abs, feeling the thick muscles under the skin. She hesitates momentarily before she wraps her hand around his member, feeling the firm texture under the silky skin. Her breath becomes shallow and rapid. ‘I’m okay. I’m okay.’ Slight fear and excitement come through. ‘I’m doing this because I want to.’ She experiments with running her hand up the shaft and down again. She pumps him a few more times, marveling at the way his abs tense each time with her strokes. 

Her hand made his back tighten, his nerves feel like they were on fire. “Good.” He breathes faster, digging holes in the ground with his claws. He wants to touch her, to taste her skin, but she is still fearful and he knew it. 

She leans over to brush her lips along his abs, experimenting with kissing him elsewhere in a sexual way. It feels exciting and she is enjoying herself. She moves her lips along the side of his hip. 

“You torment this Sesshomaru,” he heaves out between deep breaths. The kisses made him want to climb the walls, to flip her onto her back, yet restraint, he had to restrain himself for her sake. 

“No more than he deserves,” she jokes, before scraping her teeth against his thigh, nipping lightly. She continues to stroke his penis, enjoying each time she sees his muscle twitch. She wonders what it would feel like inside her. Her own fire is burning. She pulls her hand away, looking up at his face. She slides her hand up his abs and along his chest. Her right leg shifts up and over shakily to straddle his abs. She leans down to kiss his lips, feeling the wonderful texture and the way they move with her, letting the movements sooth her nerves. 

He moves with her, allowing her to experiment with what it would feel like when he entered. He finally raises a hand and slowly caresses one of her shaking legs. “It’s okay,” he whispers, opening his eyes. 

Avalon nods, staring deep into his eyes as she rocks her hips, grinding her clit into him, pushing her breasts into his chest. She reaches behind her, stroking his cock with her hand, the other hand holds the side of his face to bring her lips to his, relaxing and enjoying the way he is allowing her to be in control. She was never in control of her sexual experiences. 

He groans in pleasure feeling himself bubble at the tip. “Will you let this Sesshomaru touch you now?” Anymore and he would finish in her hand. 

Avalon swallows her nerves and nods her head. “Yes,” she whispers to him. 

He rolls her onto her back, finding a place for himself between her legs, putting slight pressure against her opening to warm her to him. He lifts his torso, so his hand holds his head up and sweetly kisses her mouth. ‘Trust me.’ He begs in his mind, he needs her. “What do you desire?” 

Avalon trembles slightly under his body. “I...uh...kiss me?” she asks hopefully. ‘Perhaps it will calm me.’ 

He brushes his lips against hers, sensually rocking his hips into hers. He grazes her lips slightly with his teeth, careful that his fangs don’t cause damage to her supple skin. “What else?” It was tormenting his soul to allow her so much control. He satiates his own need by slowly gliding his hand along her hip, her side and finally the side of her breast, avoiding more intimate touch. 

Avalon relaxes as his hand runs along her body sensually. “Touch me?” she asks questioningly. 

He sits back on his haunches, kneeling over her. He runs his palm up her thighs stopping before her heat and retreating, purposely teasing her, but giving her time to relax into his touch. “Like that?” 

Avalon nods her head but she is hungry for more. Lust clouds her mind. “More?” 

He leans over her and kisses her throat, licking lazy circles under her chin, lost in her scent. ‘How did this comfort me?’ Vague memories of the first flare of pain in his stump stumble drunkenly into his mind. He had buried himself in her neck. His lips burn a trail against her skin, tender yet roughly at the same time. 

Avalon tilts her head back, letting him have more access. He licks at the skin, enjoying the taste. His hand moves along her side, stopping at her breast and grabs the mound massaging it in his hand. His thumb and index finger roll the nipple back and forth as his mouth moves down her collarbone, to engulf the other breast. 

Avalon’s breath hitches as her fear buds up. “Stop!”

Sesshomaru smells her fear and pulls back, cupping her chin. “What’s wrong?” He swallows roughly. 

Avalon’s lips tremble. “I...I… it’s just” Avalon thickly swallows the grief pushing at her. “He did that to me,” she whispers.

“Did what?” he asks her, removing himself from between her legs and lays down on his side next to her, rubbing her shoulders. “What did he do?” His chest flutters uncomfortably. ‘What did he do? What did he ruin?’ Guilt was a beast that was mastering him. 

“He would try to make me beg for him to take me.” Tears slip down from her eyes, along her cheeks. “He would play with my breasts, trying to get me to want him.” 

He pulls her into his chest, still trying to control himself. He’s so hard it hurts and yet as he wraps her arm around his waist holding her and she nestles into his body he’s filled with warmth again. He kisses her forehead, unsure of what he should say. “Do you want to stop?” 

“I don’t. I’m sorry. This is just more difficult than I thought it would be.” 

“Do you want to be touched somewhere else?” 

“That’s the hardest thing Sesshomaru. There isn’t an inch of me he didn’t violate.” She hangs her head in shame. “I'm sorry, I don’t mean to be difficult.” 

“Shh,” he quiets her, running his hand up and down her back. “Avalon,” he tugs her chin out from it’s hiding space against his chest. He presses his lips against hers. “When you are ready to resume, tell me.” He lets her face go back against his chest while ignoring the pain of stiffness below. ‘I’m going to kill him.’ 

Avalon nods her head against his chest. Looking up, she reaches her hand out to cup his cheek. “Kiss me for now?” 

“For now, this Sesshomaru will submit to you.” He opens his mouth over hers. 

Avalon pulls him down to her mouth, allowing their tongues to dance as tears still flow from her eyes. She so badly wants to give him what he needs and what her body craves, but she just keeps getting scared. 

He pulls back and mutters against her lips. “I want you to finish.” He kisses her neck. “To know pleasure. Trust this Sesshomaru.” He holds her upper arm, eyes intense, waiting for her to answer. 

“I trust you Sesshomaru, that isn’t what my issue is.” 

He thinks to himself how to help her become comfortable with his touch. “What do you need? To be comfortable? To let me touch you?” 

“Clothes might help.” She winks at him. 

He gets up sadly and still painfully hard, walking to his clothes. 

“Where are you going?” she asks confused and hurt. 

“You said to get dressed,” he answers, completely befuddled. “I will not force you.” 

“I... meant for me,” she says just above a whisper embarrassed. 

“You make no sense, Avalon.” He goes to her kimono, the juban is tattered now, and hands her the kimono, then sits down, keeping his distance cross legged. “Talk to me,” he prods her gently and his head falls slightly, feeling another something else in his chest. ‘I have been with virgins, I have been with many women, never one that has been violated.’ He scoots closer to her and pulls her forehead down to his. “I will submit,” he repeats himself. “What do you need?” 

Avalon puts the kimono on but leaves it open. “I probably won’t make sense for a while, Sesshomaru. What I need mostly, is time and until then, I can improvise. It was why I wanted the juban on when we started. He would strip me bare. Without anything on, I feel more vulnerable. It’s stupid, it’s not like you can’t shred this as easily as you did the juban,” she says shyly and slightly ashamed of confessing herself to him. 

“Do not be embarrassed.” He slowly kisses her lips. “It’s your first time. I have never…” he wants to choke on the growing emotion in his chest until he latches onto the word she had said, ‘vulnerable’. “I have never been with a woman like you before. Let me show you what it should have been like.” 

Avalon bites her cheek before nodding. She would love to know what it should have been like. “Alright,” she whispers to him while looking at him trustingly. 

He takes his time warming her mouth again and puts gentle pressure on her back, trying to get her to move into his lap. He straightens his legs, making it easier for her. “Come closer.” 

Avalon gingerly moves closer and straddles his legs 

He caresses her chin and her eyes. “You’re safe Avalon. You’re safe,” he repeats himself, slowly folding his legs again to create a nest for her body to slide tightly into his. His mouth falls on her shoulders and then her chin before engulfing her mouth again. He can feel himself licking at her lips below. “Shh,” he mutters bringing her thighs closer to his hips, then his hand begins to explore. He tentatively reaches out to touch her breast that is hidden beneath the cloth. “Is it good?” 

“Hai, it feels good. Please I need to see your eyes,” she says softly while her breath becomes more rapid. 

He nods opening his eyes as he puts more pressure on her breast. He continues manipulating it, then brushes his thumb over her nipple. He moves his hand to her other breast watching her, scenting the air for fear but can smell none. He slides his hand down, between her breasts and her abs, seeking to touch her lower. 

His skin covers in sweat and need until he can feel droplets dripping down his forehead and his fingers tremble slightly. ‘Why do you trust me? With this? With your intimacy?’ He presses the pad of his thumb into her clit, letting the bud slip back and forth. “This?” He pants against her mouth kissing her. 

Avalon’s breath is shallow and her body jumps each time his thumb runs over her nub “Good,” she says, breathily. 

His thumb keeps up its pace, leisurely circling her. But then as he brings her in for another tender kiss, he slides in one finger and then another, thrusting firmly, feeling her swell. “This?” 

Avalon gasps when he pushes his fingers inside and feels the pleasure building within herself. She nods her head lazily. The pleasure continues building as she rocks with his hand still watching him. She feels herself muscles tightening further and further until it snaps. Her head rolls back as she holds to his shoulders, clinging for dear life. She pants never feeling anything like this before, rolling with the high. 

“Like this,” he keeps his fingers engaged, extending her pleasure. “It should have been like this.” His mouth covers hers, so firmly and softly at the same time. “Are you ready?” 

Avalon nods her head eagerly. “Yes,” she says, still panting with the pleasure. 

He lowers his knees, closing the distance between her core and his shaft. “Come down when you are ready.” He grips her shoulder in anticipation. 

Avalon brings herself to slowly lower herself on to it. She can feel him stretch her opening. He is larger than anyone previously. A slight whimper escapes her lips. She slowly rocks her hip to get used to the position. 

He gasps as she sheathes him, nearly coming from that motion alone. His mouth opens and closes at how hot, wet and tight she is. His breathing speeds and his hold on her shoulder tightens. “Does it hurt?” the words pour from his mouth as he holds her and the warmth in his chest spreads and intensifies. 

Avalon looks at him. “It hurts a little but not much. I will be fine,” she says in a whisper as pain still emanates from him stretching her. 

His hand moves to her back to bring her closer, so he can feel all of her. “You feel so good,” he groans as his hips slowly rock into hers. Their foreheads touch and their lips. “Is it okay?” 

“It is,” she says against his lips, rolling her hips as he pushes into her. 

He groans again, deep growls of pleasure and ecstasy against her neck, his mouth sucks the tender flesh. He wants her to finish again so he reaches down to help her, finding her bud and circling it again, urging her where he wants her. “Avalon,” he moans. 

Avalon’s hips move faster as she moves up and down his shaft while his finger stimulates her. She moans with pleasure and feels herself building to a precipice until she feels the dam break and ecstasy takes her as she keeps her eyes focused on the golden pools of Sesshomaru’s eyes. “Sesshomaru,” she moans out as her lips crash down onto his mouth. 

The pulsing is too much and he cups her ass, forcing her harder down onto his shaft and turns the slow rocking into a faster movement, covering her body in his sweat. He revels in the way she feels around him as he slides in and out of her. He can tell he will not last much longer and takes a moment to slow down. ‘More,’ he wants it to last longer. 

“Don’t slow down. Do not try to prolong this, not now,” Avalon warns desperately. She didn’t know when or if she would lose her focus and fear might creep back in and she wanted him to get his release. 

Sesshomaru speeds up his pace to find his release and with a final thrust, he empties his seed into her, coating her womb. “Avalon,” he kisses her cheek while pulling her hair into a tail by her neck. He pulls out of her quickly, concerned by her admonishment. ‘Why wouldn’t she want to prolong the pleasure?’ He can’t believe his body is dripping with dew or the feeling in his chest. Sex had never felt like this before. Not so warm, so inviting as if she trusted him with all of her being. “Like this,” he holds her tightly. “It should have been like this.” 

“This was wonderful. Thank you,” she says, gratefully. ‘I can't believe I did it without panicking.’ Avalon's body relaxes against his knowing that she can trust him with everything she is. 

“You will tell this Sesshomaru when you want it again. The craving will return in time.” He moves onto his side, taking her with him. ‘Why am I holding her? I never would have before.’ 

Avalon sighs happily cuddling into his side. “I will,” she says tiredly. 

“Is it sore?” he asks her concerned that he had hurt her. 

“Not really, it's a little bit but it's already fading,” she says wistfully. 

“Good. He rubs her back through the kimono, satisfied with the interaction. “You are mine.” His chest puffs and deflates less quickly. 

Avalon raises a brow. “Does that mean you are mine?” 

“Don’t presume too much.” 

“What does that mean Sesshomaru?” She mimics his tone, “Don’t presume too much” 

“You are female,” he says blandly. 

“AND that means what?” 

“You are incapable of ownership.” He leans his chest into her side, kissing her neck. 

“I don’t want to own you but I don’t want to be owned either. But if you insist I am yours then you better be mine.” 

He covers her mouth with his hand, barely able to reach her lips with more than his index and middle finger. “You speak too often.” 

She opens her mouth and bites at his finger lightly, clamping down. 

He growls at her in warning, nipping at her shoulder. 

She growls right back, still holding his fingers in her mouth. 

He pulls them back frustrated, dumping her onto the ground, standing up and stomping to his clothes. 

She gets up, following him and reaches down grabbing his clothes. “Don’t think to silence me by physical means Sesshomaru,” she warns. She bends down holding the hakama open for him. 

He rips the pants out of her hands, sliding one foot in awkwardly, nearly tripping, then putting the other one in, pulling them up and loosely tying them with one hand. He starts grabbing his underlayer, slinging it over his left shoulder, holding it in place with his mouth while sliding his right arm in and working the ties, annoyed that he can’t get them. 

Avalon watches amused, even as she feels the anger in his aura. She steps in front of him. “Order me to tie them if you wish or don’t.” 

He ignores her and grabs his hankimono, throwing it over his left shoulder first holding it in place again. He picks up his armor, katana, obi and shoes and starts walking away. 

Avalon shakes her head. “You just going to leave me here? Your woman.” 

‘A woman incapable of submission,’ his mind seethes. He kneels down pulling his shoes back on. ‘A woman incapable of giving this Sesshomaru an heir.’ He lashes out at her, “You cannot provide this Sesshomaru an heir! You cannot submit!” He fumbles with the ties again. 

Avalon feels indignant. “What do you mean I can’t give you an heir?” She crosses her arms. “And I told you, I’m not submissive. You told me you wanted a strong willed partner and that is what you got.” 

He becomes furious with her inability to consider his pride, finally managing to close the ties. He pulls his armor over his head and then says, “you are incapable of having children, incapable of leaving an heir behind. You are not what this Sesshomaru wanted in a mate,” the words come out bitterly as he throws the obi over his shoulder and grips Tenseiga. 

“I’m sorry,” she says sincerely. “I might be able to have children for you. I don’t know but I’m sorry I’m not what you wanted,” her voice sounds defeated and her arms hang down as her shoulders slump. 

“Not the child I would want to leave behind,” he says furiously. “Not like this Sesshomaru, something with tainted blood, something other.” He slams his fist into a tree. ‘I should have let her die.’ He starts moving to the forest again. 

Avalon starts crying. She can’t give him a pureblooded child, she knows that, so she really doesn’t know what to say. She falls on her knees. “What do you want from me Sesshomaru? I’m very new to this and you’re not helping me understand. Forgive me.” 

He pulls his obi off his shoulder and begins trying to tie it again. “Caring only about yourself prevents your  _ understanding _ .” The last word comes out as a jibe. 

“Then help me. I can only go by what I know. Lay it out for me. Don’t expect me to just know what I’m supposed to be like.” 

He slides tenseiga into his obi and turns on her, eyes lined with emotions, stress, his hand running up to his left shoulder again. “You only care about your traditions, the customs of this place you come from. I am not human, I will not become your lap-dog.” 

Avalon shakes her head trying to clear the tears. “I don’t want a lap-dog Sesshomaru. But in my time there are no youkai and I can only go by human traditions. So help me adapt. I want to make you happy without losing myself in the process.” 

“You’re time?” He becomes furious. “You’re time?” He approaches her, “is there anything you didn’t lie about? First a traveler from another land, now another time?” 

“I am from another land and another time. I’m from the future Sesshomaru or at least I think it’s the future. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before but would you have believed me?” 

“You are deceitful, dishonorable,” he backs away in disbelief. “I should have not saved your life, bound myself to one such as you.” He needs space before he explodes, before he lashes out. “You cannot be what this Sesshomaru needs in a mate. Incapable of truth, of bearing children…” 

Avalon stays on her knees. She whispers, “I’m so sorry, this is never what I intended. I’m sorry.” Her body slumps to the ground as she feels herself buckle under his words and regret. 

“Go back to the hut,” he bites out and flies away leaving Avalon behind. 

“Yeah sure cause I know exactly where I am,” Avalon says dejectedly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment and kudo!!!


	22. Avalon’s Lone Journey

She stays slumped on the ground for a few more minutes as she gathers her emotions back together. She grabs her half tied obi and finishes tying it, then looks around for anything familiar but finds nothing remarkable. Avalon slowly walks off gazing at the trees and climbs one that looks easy enough. She gets as high as she can and glances about still not recognizing anything. She sits for a moment thinking what to do. ‘I’ll head south.’ She knows it will lead to the sea and from there and hopes to find edo. 

After a few hours of travel, she is happy to recognize a very familiar tree. ‘Goshinboku.’ Avalon lets out a sigh of relief. She makes her way to the village looking for Inuyasha. Inuyasha suddenly jumps out in front of her sword drawn. Avalon steps back on instinct forming a barrier at the same time. 

Inuyasha sniffs the air balking. “Who the hell are you?” 

“My name is Avalon. We didn’t get to meet each other properly before. It is a pleasure to meet you Inuyasha-sama.” Avalon bows politely. 

He’s taken aback. She smells like Sesshomaru. “What are you doing here?” He raises Tetsusaiga threateningly. “Why did you fuck Sesshomaru?” 

Avalon’s cheeks redden. “Well because um…. uh…. hmmmm. I don’t know if you would understand but we um...I needed to?” Her face contorts oddly, not really sure how to explain it. “Look I didn’t come here to fight Inuyasha. Were you able to get to Kagome in time?” 

“Why should I trust you, if you are allied with him?” 

Avalon bites her index finger. “I’m not your enemy. Remember I protected you. If I were an enemy why would I do that?” 

“So you could fuck Sesshomaru.” He pinches the bridge of his nose. “How does that make me trust you?” 

“What? How do those two things even correlate? I warned you to go to Kagome. That she needed you. I protect you so you can escape. I held Sesshomaru at bay. What does that have to do with my sex life?” 

“I don’t trust anyone that would sleep with him. Leave the village now.” He sniffs again snarling. “He’s still here, bastard.” 

“I can’t leave unless you promise me something.” 

“Onna I owe you nothing,” he says annoyed. “Just tell me why I shouldn’t kill you now.” 

“Well I’m human for one and second, I’ve done nothing to you. But if you try to harm me I will defend myself.” Avalon reiki rises reinforcing her barrier 

He swings Tetsusaiga at the barrier bouncing off it and landing on his backside. He stands up and attacks it again, growling frustrated. 

“Try that again and I’ll turn your sword into a rusty blade again.” 

“I’ll still have my claws.” He runs at her again, aiming for the barrier. 

“Baka!” Avalon summons her sword and lets reiki permeate the air stinging at Inuyasha’s skin and transforming his blade back to its regular form. Avalon raises the blade to her side, waiting on his next move 

He digs his claws into his chest, jumping into the air. “Hijin Kesou (Blades of blood),” and sends them flying at the barrier. They smack into it unable to penetrate the barrier.

Sesshomaru watches from a tree branch in the distance rolling his eyes. ‘He’s doomed.’ 

Avalon swings her blade out letting a small bolt of purple lightning strike through her barrier, aimed straight at Inuyasha. She doesn’t want to really hurt him but she is going to let him know she isn’t someone to take lightly. 

Kaede comes running from the village, down the cement steps. “Inuyasha stop!” she yells, with an outstretched hand before he can try to land another blow. “She isn’t an enemy!”

Inuyasha turns on the old woman. “She’s allied with Sesshomaru!” 

Kaede turns back on Avalon, staring intently in her eyes. “What did he do to you?” she asks, concerned. 

Avalon shrugs. “Saved my life.” 

“Sesshomaru would never save the life of humans, or love one. She’s probably just his whore.” Inuyasha sheathes Tetsusaiga.

“Inuyasha!” Kaede fumes at him. “Avalon...what happened? Did you trade your soul to him?” 

Avalon lets her blade fade away and crosses her arms indignantly. “Of course not. It’s not like that at all.” 

“Then what is it? Only an evil like Naraku chooses to take a demon’s yoki.” 

Avalon huffs, “I didn’t choose it. I was bleeding to death and he healed me with his yoki but I guess he miscalculated.” 

“Miscalculated?” 

“Well he accidently bound us together.” 

Sesshomaru’s ears perk up, listening from a distance. ‘She is unproud to be bound to this Sesshomaru.’

Inuyasha starts cackling. “And I bet you think he’ll love you too. Idiot.” 

“What does this mean?” Kaede’s worry grows. She knows of the darkness in Avalon’s past from Hikari, the past they share. “Is there a way to break it? Why choose to live with him. Surely there is someone better out there for you.” 

‘Better,’ Sesshomaru listens intently. ‘Who would take her? Who would be better?’ 

Avalon actually gets angry at Keade’s conclusions. “It’s not a choice I made and there is no way to break the bond. I don’t know how I feel about us being together. He is kind to me at times but cruel at other times. There’s a lot we need to work on but I guess we have a lot of time for that.” 

Inuyasha snorts, “you’ll never get him to agree to anything.” Inuyasha walks away.

“I’m worried for you Avalon. Why accept such cruelty upon yourself?”

‘This Sesshomaru is not cruel. She is arrogant and immature.’ 

Avalon shakes her head, knowing Kaede won’t understand. “I cannot change things Kaede. The only thing I can do to escape our bond is to die.” 

Kaede covers her mouth and hugs Avalon. “May the gods protect you from such a fate.” 

‘I will protect her,’ Sesshomaru flares angrily. 

Avalon notices Inuyasha’s retreat and calls over, “INUYASHA wait!” 

“What do you want?” he calls over his shoulder. “I’m not finding him for you.” 

“I won’t ask that of you. I am asking you to protect Hikari for me for a little while. I have a few things I need to do and I worry for her safety.” 

“Hikari is safe in the village,” Kaede comments confused. “What’s going on?” 

Avalon shakes her head. “No, she isn’t, not really. There is an evil out there that has set his sights on me and he will try to use Hikari against me.” 

“How does this concern me?” Inuyasha asks. 

“It’s the same evil that set you and Kikyo against each other.” 

“What do you know about Kikyo?” Shock washes through him.

‘More secrets.’ Sesshomaru knuckles his forehead, annoyed. ‘How much have you lied to this Sesshomaru about?’ 

“Fifty years ago you and Kikyo had a falling out. You thought Kikyo betrayed you, so you stole the jewel. She stopped you with her sacred arrow pinning you to the tree. But Kikyo was not the one who shot those three arrows at you before you stole the jewel. That was an evil demon named Naraku.” 

Inuyasha shivers, too many emotions coursing through him at once. “What?”

Sesshomaru’s anger reaches its peak. ‘She would give him information so freely, and make this Sesshomaru beg like a dog.’ He leaves the branch to go to Hikari’s hut. ‘It’s enough. This is enough.’ 

“Inuyasha I know this is a shock, but I’m telling you this to let you know we have a common enemy. And I am asking you to protect Hikari from that enemy.” 

“No,” he clenches his fists. “That’s not what happened. She betrayed me.” 

“She promised to never call you a half breed after you gave her your name. Then the time she shot the three arrows she called you one. Yet when she shot the arrow to seal you, she called you Inuyasha. Why do you think that is?” 

“I’m not interested in your mind games, onna.”

“Inuyasha she loved you,” Kaede whispers quietly. “She loved you.” Kaede tears up. “Kikyo-onisama, would have been happy with you.” 

“Inuyasha, it’s not a mind game I’m playing, I’m trying to point out facts. Those three arrows missed you by a long shot. You didn’t really have to dodge them. If she was aiming for you, she would have hit you.” 

“Who is he? The one who did this?” Inuyasha is trembling. Anger, hurt and sorrow course through his veins. “If you want me to protect the girl...who is he?” 

“He was a normal man once by the name of Onigumo. Kikyo found him badly burned and his body was broken. She fed him and he harbored desires for her. He sold his soul to demons to get his mobility but it did not go as he planned. The new creation born was Naraku. He set you and Kikyo against each other. Disguised as Kikyo, he fired arrows at you and disguised as you, he struck Kikyo down. She barely made it back to pin you to the tree. Naraku hoped to taint the jewel but Kikyo took it to the nether world with her. And she was reincarnated as Kagome, bringing the jewel back to this world.” 

He grits his teeth, thinking.

“You knew all this Avalon and you said nothing?” Kaede backs away from her. “You knew my sister died in vain?” 

“I’ll watch her.” Inuyasha walks away dejected with his shoulders slumped and heart aching.

“Avalon, why would you keep secrets like this?” Kaede is befuddled. 

“It would not change anything. Kaede does it make things hurt less for you? I am sorry for keeping this from you. Kikyo did not die in vain though. She did stop the jewel from being tainted and she stopped Naraku from getting it. I can only imagine the horrors upon this world if he had gotten it. Please forgive me.” Avalon gets on her knees and bows low on the ground to Keade 

“I’m disappointed in you Avalon,” Kaede says ruefully. “I took you into my home, cared for you, when you were left here and you knew all this.” Kaede hobbles back to the cement steps leading to the shrine, leaning heavily on her staff. 

“You would not let me leave Kaede.” 

“It’s not just about you Avalon,” Kaede says over her shoulder. “You have hurt many people with these omissions. You endangered the entire village, not because he targeted you but because you knew and said nothing. What will you do with Hikari?” 

“I will be taking Hikari from the village. It is not safe here. I think I might have an idea but I must discuss it with Sesshomaru. I am very sorry, Keade.” Avalon turns with shoulders slumped and heads for the forest of Inuyasha. 

“You used the wisdom of a child Avalon. Did you think at all what would have happened if I had known Kagome was coming? If I had been prepared to welcome her? All of this...you should know better than to try to control time. I hope for your sake you’ve learned your lesson.” She continues to the steps. 

“Kaede I cannot say how sorry I am. I can’t change the past but I will try to do better in the future. Kikyo’s ashes will be stolen and she will be resurrected. You need to let it happen, even though it will hurt.” 

“Why?” 

“Her power will be needed to defeat Naraku.” 

Kaede nods and leaves. 

Avalon continues to walk into the forest of Inuyasha in search of the Well. She finds it in a clearing and looks down, feeling power radiate from it. ‘I wonder if you will let me through?’ She climbs to sit on the ledge, dangling her feet, then leaps down. Purple and blue light envelopes her. She lands softly on the other side. Avalon looks up and sees the ceiling of the shine and the ladder in front of her. She climbs and as her head breaches the well’s ledge, the shrine's doors open and a young woman enters with black hair and sailor school uniform, carrying a large yellow backpack. Her eyes widen seeing another woman in the Well. “Who are you?”

“Uh...hi! My name is Avalon. It’s a pleasure to meet you.” Avalon continues to climb out the Well in her sea-green kimono.

“Um...hi...did you come from the other side of the Well?”

“Yes and no. You mind if we talk?”

“Uh...sure. You’re human right?”

Avalon smiles. “More so than not.”

“What?” Kagome looks confused by her admission.

“I’m human. Can we go inside?”

“Uh...sure, I’m Kagome Higurashi by the way.”

Avalon smiles, tipping her head. “Higurashi.”

Kagome leads Avalon back to the house. “Mom, I’m back!”

“Oh honey, did something happen?” Kagome’s mother’s voice comes deep from within the house as she rushes towards the kitchen.

“Kind of...I met someone.”

“Oh?” Kagome’s mom comes into the kitchen and stops to look at a young woman in a kimono standing next to her daughter.

“Mrs Higurashi.” Avalon bows politely.

Mrs Higurashi goes over to Avalon and grabs at the fine kimono. “This is beautiful.”

“Arigato.” Avalon isn’t quite comfortable by the older woman’s proximity but she allows her to continue her ogling. 

“Such long and luscious hair! Are you a model?”

“Ie.”

“You should be! You're so gorgeous. Are you married?”

Kagomes gets annoyed with her mother’s invasion of Avalon’s space.

“I--”

“If not, I know a few men who would be happy to.”

“MOOOMMMM!”

“Oh I’m sorry dear. I’ll leave you two be.” She gives her daughter and her new friend a gentle smile and nods, heading into the other room.

“I’m so sorry about that.”

“It’s okay.”

“Are you hungry?”

“Actually yes, very much so.”

“Have a seat and I’ll whip you up something to eat.”

Avalon walks over to a stool and sits while Kagome goes about the kitchen grabbing a pan and eggs and other ingredients. She mixes them all together and puts the pan on the stove, turning on the burner and melts the butter. She adds the eggs and rolls them up as they cook. She grabs a plate, putting the rolled egg on it, slicing them and then sets it in front of Avalon. “Tamagoyaki, my specialty.” Kagome smiles waiting for Avalon to take a bite.

Avalon grabs the chopsticks and takes a bit. It's a little salty but not too bad. She grins and nods her head, eating the rest of the Tamagoyaki. “Arigato Higurashi.”

“You can just call me Kagome. You’re a foreigner aren’t you?”

“I am more foreign than you think.”

“How so?”

“Well, I’m from the future.”

“WHAT? Like me?”

“Sort of, but I’m from 2019 well 2020 now. I’ve been trapped in the feudal area for about a year now.”

“Oh my gosh that must have been awful.”

Avalon shakes her head. It was more awful than the poor school girl could imagine. “I’d really rather not talk about my time there.”

“Okay, then what do you want to do?”

“I would like to go shopping. I have missed some modern conveniences.”

“I can only imagine but yeah, we can go shopping.”

“I don’t have any yen though.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure my mom will be willing to help when she learns about your past.”

Avalon nods.

“You wait here. I’ll go talk to my mom. Do you need anything before I go?”

“Water?”

“Oh sure.”

Kagome pops up and grabs a glass from the cabinet, bringing it down to the sink to fill. Kagome hands the full glass to Avalon and goes to the other room to explain Avalon’s predicament. Kagome comes back with a big smile on her face and a small black card with silver swirls on it.

“Mom lent me her card. We will fix you up and you can tell me about 2019.”

Avalon shakes her head. “Alright.”

Kagome grabs Avalon’s arm and leads her out of the home and down the stairs. 

“So what is it like?”

“Well not too much different than now I guess. I’m from America.”

“Oh your American. You know Japanese so well.”

“Yeah, I was a translator before I landed in Feudal Japan.”

“How did you get there?”

“Well I was watching TV and it kinda just sucked me in and boom Feudal Japan with demons and everything.”

“Woah, so you have no idea how to get back to your time?”

Avalon shakes her head with a stained smile on her face. “I think I’m meant to be there.”

“That can’t be right.”

Avalon shrugs her shoulders.

Kagome grabs Avalon’s arm and drags her into a large retail clothing shop. “Let's get you some modern clothes!”

“Kagome… I would like some undergarments and maybe a couple of modern outfits but I’m not staying in this time.”

“Yeah but we can get you dressed up. Come on, it will be fun. I’m so glad not to be the only one traveling through time. I finally have someone to talk to that can understand.”

Avalon raises her eyebrow. ‘We are so different, you have no idea. I hope we never have much in common.’ Avalon shakes her head clearing the memories.

“Alright, so let's get this over with and dress me up.” Avalon smiles at Kagome. 

The young teen squeals with delight. “Can we get your hair done?”

“We’ll see.”

Back in Feudal Japan, Sesshomaru approaches Hikari’s hut. He will retrieve the girl first and then gather Avalon. He finds Hikari playing with the young children. “Hikari,” he calls her name rigidly. 

Hikari looks up holding the baby on her hip. “What do you want?” she says rudely. 

“Pack your things. You are coming with us,” he says bluntly. 

“I can’t leave, I have to take care of the children!” Hikari exclaims. 

“Your life is in danger. The Miko will find someone else to care for them. Pack quickly.” 

“I’m not going anywhere!” 

He stalks to her grabbing her by the upper arm and flies into the air landing roughly by Kaede, who is working in the garden. “This child will be raped and killed if she remains,” he says to the Miko, glaring at Hikari. “You will find someone else to care for the orphaned children. And you,” an icy gaze shifts to Hikari, “will go pack your things. Now.” 

Kaede looks at Sesshomaru and nods her head. “Give me the baby Hikari, ye need to leave. Even Avalon spoke of it.”

“But Kaede-sama, they need me.”

Kaede shakes her head. “Ye cannot help them if ye are dead child. Go and pack ye thinks quickly as he asks.”

Hikari glares at the demon holding her arm and hands the baby to Kaede. “Fine, I’ll go.” 

He releases her arm and follows behind Hikari. “Stubborn child...stubborn females,” he speaks under his breath. ‘Why did I use my blood?’ 

Hikari stomps back to her hut and enters, grabbing the few things she owns. She comes out with a small bundle. “Alright, now where to, oh mighty Lord,” sarcasm drips from her voice. 

He flicks Hikari’s ear with his middle finger and says, “follow.” Avalon’s scent goes into the forest, calling for him. The burning passion is returning and following her scent isn’t helping. ‘I should have used Tenseiga.’ 

“Owww,” Hikari rubs her ear but follows behind Sesshomaru. “Come on Jaken!” The puppy follows Hikari. “Where are we going?” 

He ignores her and hikes into the woods. He finds the dragon leaning over a small stream with one head grazing the grass while the other drinks from the stream. He runs his hands up the scales affectionately. “Get on the dragon,” he tells Hikari. 

Hikari glares at him. “Come here girl.” Hikari leans over opening her arms for the puppy to leap into them. She struggles to get up on the dragon trying to juggle the dog and her things. “Grrr.” She finally manages to get up 

“Jaken get up!” he yells at the imp sleeping by the trees. “Follow.” He continues trailing after Avalon’s scent. It was sweet and seductive and making him curse internally. 

He walks along the path so clearly set before him by her scent. 

“Jaken-sama, do you know where we are going?” Hikari asks from on top of the dragon.

“How would I know?” Jaken yells indignantly. 

“You never know anything.”

“I do to you little pipsqueak.”

“Not uh you little toad!”

“I am not a toad!”

“You’re right that would be an insult to toads. You’re much worse.”

“You cursed little brat.”  
“I’m not a brat!”

“Shut-up!” Sesshomaru barks at them, but then is overtaken by confusion. He comes to an open clearing but as he approaches an old, dried out well her scent disappears. “Stay.” He leaps into the well touching the dirt and bones, wrinkling his eyebrows. ‘Where did you go?’ 

Just then he hears his half brother. “SESSHOMARU!!!!” The red clad male jumps down a tree in front of Hikari with his back to her and his sword drawn looking at the well. 

Well, it will give him something to do with the pent up rage, confusion and a hoard of other feelings he didn’t have a name for. He leaps out of the well and attacks, claw flying at Inuyasha’s throat. 

The two males clash with each other as Hikari stays with the dragon, holding Jaken Jr. and watching them. She tries to follow their movements with her eyes but they are moving so fast.

Just then Avalon dressed in jeans and a blue t-shirt with a small black pack on her back and Kagome land at the bottom of the well. They hear the two males taunting and fighting above them. Avalon looks at Kagome and Kagome has wide eyes, unsure of what to do. 

Sesshomaru flies at Inuyasha, grazing his shoulder, then kicks the hanyou’s feet out from underneath him. Inuyasha counters by sending white blades at Sesshomaru. Sesshomaru slaps them down, grabbing Inuyasha by the neck and slamming him into the grass, plowing a trail of upturned dirt, until they crash into a tree. “Pathetic hanyou! Why Father would sire something like you.” His grip tightens on Inuyasha’s neck. 

Inuyasha kicks his feet, freeing himself from Sesshomaru’s grip. “Shut up, will yeh!” 

Avalon and Kagome climb out of the well. Avalon jumps over and gets in front of Inuyasha putting herself in between him and Sesshomaru. She turns her back to Inuyasha looking at Sesshomaru. “Sesshomaru what is this?” 

He grabs her by the arm, flies to the dragon, slinging her on top of it’s back, then slaps it’s backside to get it moving, making Hikari nearly fall off and Jaken dangle by the tail. He flies in front of them leading the dragon, gritting his teeth. ‘Disrespectful, ungrateful, deceitful.’ 

Avalon clings to the dragon and Hikari grabs onto Avalon with one hand while holding the puppy with the other.  “Avalon-onesan, I’m going to fall!” Hikari grabs at Avalon’s shirt. 

Avalon reaches one hand back to wrap it around Hikari’s waist, pulling Hikari into her back “Hold on. Sesshomaru please what is going on?” 

His eyes remain ahead ignoring Avalon, but his right hand is glued to the stump again. ‘Dammit…’ he knows he’s overdone it again and the ache is building. 

Avalon huffs. “Can I ask where we are going, my Lord?” she says as respectfully as she can manage. 

Sesshomaru glances at her, ice glazing over his eyes, then turns forward again. For a moment he loses altitude gripping his shoulder, grunting. He shakes his head to get control of himself and resumes leading the way. ‘I need rest.’ 

Avalon notices him holding his stump and his sudden drop. ‘He’s using too much yoki.’ “Sesshomaru-sama, please join us on the dragon. He is your beast after all.” 

Sesshomaru glances back, eyes tottering on red, knowing exactly what she is trying to get him to do. He ignores it and flies further ahead of them. 

Avalon shakes her head. “Stay with him, try to ride lower just in case. Okay guys?” She rubs the dragon’s neck 

They fly sometime in the sky until a familiar sight catches Avalon’s eyes. “Your mother’s?” she says quietly. 

He lands roughly on his feet, leaning against a pillar for support. “Jaken, take Avalon and the child to the bathhouse. She stinks,” he says of Hikari. “Find something for her to wear.” And he storms down a hallway panting, gripping his shoulder from the pain of his lost arm. ‘Rest, I just need rest.’ 

Jaken looks over at Avalon and Hikari. “Come on, I’ll show you the way.” Avalon watches as Sesshomaru walks away until he is out of sight. ‘Why does he have to be so stubborn? I hope he is okay.’ Her lips press together, worry permeating her being. 

Jaken leads them down the hall. Avalon and Hikari look around, seeing multiple youkai walking the halls. The floors sport lush red rugs and the wall is lined in large paintings of inu-youkai framed in gold. There are lamps in between each painting lighting the way. 

Jaken stops at a shoji screen. “The bathing chamber is through here. I will send in someone to help you and find some clothing for you.” 

Avalon nods and takes Hikari’s hand as she still grasps Jaken Jr. Avalon pipes up. “What about the puppy? I want to make sure she is safe.” 

Jaken turns around and stretches his arms out to take the puppy. “I’ll keep her safe. Not that you asked Avalon- _ sama,”  _ he sneers out the end, like a child. “Gobodo-sama has Healers. His pain will be dealt with. He won’t need you anymore.” 

“I am worried for Sesshomaru, Jaken but he is so stubborn. Will he allow the healers to help him?” ‘I’ll let the disrespect slide’ 

“Arigato, Jaken-sama.” Hikari hands the puppy to him. 

“Who knows,” Jaken says absentmindedly. “The real question is will his mother allow him to be so stubborn.” 

“He will bow to his mother’s will?” Avalon asks skeptically. 

“You know he wanted to kill his father and inherit his swords. You never asked why he wouldn’t kill his mother for her weapons? Sesshomaru-sama is not an idiot. He knows when he is outmatched.” 

“If you want to keep your head, I wouldn’t say that around him but I am glad to hear he will get help. I’ve been stressing this whole time. I don’t have any  natsushirogiku with me. I would have gathered some if he had given me some time before he snatched me up. ” 

“I’ll go find him,” Jaken says, leaving with Jaken Jr. in his arms. 

“Arigato. If he needs me please let me know?” 

‘He doesn’t need her,’ he thinks as he leaves. ‘Ugly Onna...imagine if they had children,’ he cringes, sticking his tongue out disgusted. 

Avalon’s eyebrow twitches. They enter the room used for changing and strip off their clothing. They step into a room full of steam and see what looks like a hot spring with rocks and trees. 

‘So, weird, we’re in the clouds.’ Avalon shakes her head and steps into the body of water testing the temperature. It’s hot but not where it will burn their skin. Avalon slowly steps in as Hikari steps in as well. Avalon lets her muscles relax and she unwinds in the water as Hikari does the same.

“Oh my Avalon, this is wonderful!”

“It feels nice.” Avalon smiles.

Just then a female inu-youkai steps in dressed in servant clothes. She sneers at the vile creatures she feels are polluting the spring. “I am here to help you bathe,” she says with disdain. 

Avalon glances over at her and glares at the woman. “We are fine. We only need clothes,” Avalon says dismissively. 

“As you wish. They are waiting for you in the changing room.”

“You may go.” Avalon flicks her hand dismissing her.

The youkai bristles at the blatant disrespect. She would punish the belligerent female ningen. The yokai stalks quietly towards Avalon ready to lash out with her energy whip when reiki fills the air.

“I wouldn’t challenge me, if I were you, youkai.”

The reiki stings the servant's skin and she dashes from the room. She passes into the changing room and then exits seeing Sesshomaru.

“Sesshomaru-sama it is an honor to see you.” The youkai bows to him 

“Take the child to her room and give her a new kimono.” He is forcing himself upright but his shoulder is burning and he has all but avoided his mother and the healer. 

“Hai, my Lord.” She ducks back into the room and goes to the spring. “The honorable Sesshomaru-sama has requested I take the child to her room.”

Avalon raises her eyebrow. She lets reiki brush against the yokai’s skin and it sizzles. “If she is harmed, I will come for your head. Do you understand me?”

The youkai backs up and nods.

“Good.” She lets the reiki subside. “You can go with her Hikari.”

“Are you sure Avalon?”

Avalon smiles. “I’m sure or I will tear the whole place apart.” Avalon winks at Hikari.

Hikari smiles and gets out of the spring and exits with the youkai. As Hikari and the servant pass Sesshomaru, he leans heavily against the wall. “The child will choose the cloth and you will make it,” he orders the female Inu-youkai. “Hikari,” he calls the child. 

“Hai, Sesshomaru-sama?” 

“You will tell her what colors you like. Make her room comfortable for her. A futon, not a tabi mat and ensure she eats.” He closes his eyes, exhausted. “And find someone to teach her the sword.” He waves his hand at the servant. 

Hikari’s eyes light up. “Arigato!” She jumps up and down. She will be taught to fight. She follows the servant down the hall. 

He rubs his stump firmly, attempting to avoid another flare up. He fights an internal battle with himself in the hallway. He is livid with her, yet stuck with her all at the same time. The door is pushed open and he comes inside, shutting it, then leans against the wall, stump first to put pressure on it. He avoids her eyes, averting his dismissively. 


	23. Castle in the Sky

Avalon lays back waiting for Sesshomaru. She is sure he intends to confront her. She lets her muscles relax as she closes her eyes 

She senses his entry. “Come join me Sesshomaru, the water is nice.” 

He remains by the wall, refusing to move, grimacing at the growing pain in his shoulder and the feelings swirling through his heart. There are too many emotions for him to understand and it isn’t helping seeing the way the steam dapples her skin in sweat. He wants to bury his nose in her neck to avoid the pain growing along his side. It begins at his left shoulder and radiates down his belly, deep into his groin. 

Avalon shakes her head. “You wish to yell at me?” She keeps her eyes closed, waiting for him to move or speak.

“Would it help you learn honesty?” His arm is folded defensively over the missing one, claws digging in irritatingly into his shoulder. He grunts as the pain builds. They will need to stay an extra day here for him to recover from this ridiculous injury. ‘I would have already, if I hadn’t bound her to me.’ 

“You wish for honesty? I have given you nothing but honesty. Omissions, but I have never lied to you Sesshomaru-sama.” She turns to look at him and sees him clutching his arm. “Are you okay?” 

His ire flares. “Omissions? Omissions that you willingly give to the hanyou.” His knees buckle beneath him as the pain takes him. He lands bent over, leaning against the door. The pain has grown from burning to throbbing, causing his entire chest to cramp and making it difficult to breathe.

Avalon gets out of the water instantaneously and is by his side. Her reiki flows to her limbs, knowing her desire to be by Sesshomaru as quickly as she was able. She leans over him. “I only told him history,” she whispers.

“You have no respect. No honor,” he struggles to catch his breath, slamming his fist sideways into the wall, annoyed that his body keeps doing this to him. “This Sesshomaru did not ask to be tied to a deceitful onna.” He curls into himself, his face falling into his knees, trying to control the pain. It’s like the arm is being ripped off again, the muscles severing, the tendons shattering. 

“I am sorry for the deceit and the disrespect. I really am not from here. Not from this country, not from this time, perhaps not even from this universe. I am confused about what will and will not help or harm things. I don’t want to hurt you,” she confesses as she puts pressure on the stump with both her hands and leans all her weight on it. She tilts her head down bearing her neck to him unintentionally with wet hair covering her face from his view. 

Against his will his mouth and nose go into her neck. He laps gently at the balmy skin, swallowing, trying to form words. It still flames. He rests his head against her shoulder, still catching his breath. 

Avalon leans her head on his. “I want to be better for you.” A tear slips from her eye, mixing with the sweat and water. “Tell me what to do?” 

“The bath,” he says weakly, hoping it will soothe the ache. He uses his free hand to push himself off the wall, fumbling with his obi, but then stopping when the movement causes his shoulder to sting again. He turns his head against the door, hugging himself. 

Avalon moves to untie his obi. She takes his sword and sets it aside. She unties his armor. “Uh you need to release your arm for me to get this off you.” 

He nods, taking a deep breath in and lets his hand fall just as a deep groan of agony emits from his throat. “This is taking too long.” He digs claws into the wall, resting his forehead against his wrist. 

Avalon pulls the armor over his head, dropping it aside. She unties the hankimono and hanjuban. She pulls them from his body. She unties the hakama and lets them drop to the floor. She pulls off his fundoshi. She gets down on her knees and lifts his one leg to remove his boot then the other. She offers a hand to help him to the water. 

He nods accepting that the pain is crippling him and wraps an arm around her shoulder. “Slowly,” he whispers, letting her lead him to the bath. 

Avalon makes her way to the water slowly and as smoothly as possible, helping him in, then joins him in the bath. “What else can I do to help?” 

He leans his left side deeper into the springs, sighing and resting his head on the edge of the bath. His eyes close as he attempts to slow his breathing. He reaches into the water to massage the end again, wincing at the pain it causes him. 

Avalon watches helplessly, her heart pounding in her chest. “Sesshomaru, please? Tell me what I can do? Do you want me to put pressure on it? Or what? Just please let me help you.” 

His eyes slit. Her cheeks are red with worry, there are tears in her eyes. He touches the speckles on her cheeks. “Pressure.” He puts his hand under his face to cushion his cheekbone. 

Avalon moves to be at a better angle and pushes on the stump. She fuses reiki in her arm muscles so she is stronger. “Is this helping?” 

“This Sesshomaru is humiliated,” he whispers quietly. 

“Don’t feel that way. Everyone needs help and I’m your mate. You don’t need to hide from me. I’m not here to judge you on this.” She leans her head on his shoulder. 

“Leaning on me is not helping,” he pushes her back. “You are a difficult mate.” His eyes close again, trying to focus on not falling into another fever. “If you would just let me kill the hanyou, this wouldn’t have happened.” 

“Well you aren’t prince charming yourself and I’m sorry, but the hanyou needs to live.” She keeps the pressure on his stump. 

“I should have killed him when he was a child.” He leans his head into her chest, reaching around her stomach to pull her closer, so he can smell her neck. “Are you worth this pain?” 

“I hope so. Why didn’t you kill him when he was a child?” 

“There is no honor in killing children.” He lifts his mouth up to her neck, lightly clamping down to taste her skin while his body starts to shiver. “It should not hurt like this.” 

“I’m sorry, I wish I could do more.” She forces more reiki into the muscles of her right arm to hold the limb tighter while her left hand runs through his hair, trying to soothe him. 

“It’s enough,” he mutters into her neck, inhaling deeply through his nose. Her scent calms, but his lip trembles against her skin. “From the future,” he scoffs. “Did you know this Sesshomaru can experience pain? Was it like this? Did I lose my arm then?” 

Avalon inhales deeply and exhales. “Yes you lost your left arm but you recovered in a few days. You were not suffering like this. I’m sorry.” 

He raises his hand up to palm her heart. “Because I did not have you...the future you know is gone. I gave you what would have healed myself.” 

Avalon’s tears fall down her face. “I know. I’m not supposed to be here and it screws everything up. I’m so sorry I attacked you.”

Just then Avalon notices a strong demonic aura that is unfamiliar approaching them. She holds tightly to him. A barrier forms around them on instinct. Just then a very familiar looking Inu-youkai walks in holding a vial. She has long white hair in two pigtails, bangs and some loose stands. She wears a purple and white kimono with butterflies and has a crescent moon on her brow and a strip on each cheek.

“Gobodo-sama?” Avalon asks, surprised.

“You can drop the barrier now,” she says haughtily.

“Oh. gomen.” Avalon drops the barrier.

“You seem distressed my son.”

He grunts attempting to raise his head. “What...are...you...doing here...mother?” His head lolls against Avalon’s shoulders. 

“You think a mother would not notice her son in pain? You wound me and here I came bearing gifts.” She feigns hurt. 

“Get out,” his yoki rises in anger. He ignores how it makes his missing arm hurt worse than it already does. 

His mother grabs his chin roughly as she pours the content of the vail down his throat. “Hmm, you should be fine now.” She turns, walking away leaving Avalon and Sesshomaru alone. She waves backwards. “Continue on.” She walks to the door, slides it open, stepping out and closes it behind her. 

Sesshomaru chokes on the liquid, swallowing it, but already beginning to feel it’s effects on his pain. “I hate her.” He kisses Avalon’s neck again and then pulls himself off her body. 

“Did it help?” Avalon looks at him concerned. 

He leans back against the tub, nodding. “It’s a medicine for pain, specifically for my kind. I do not require medicine,” he says stubbornly, utterly defeated, now that his mother has seen him in this state. ‘Who else has seen these bouts of pain?’ he thinks. 

“You are right she is a meddling woman,” Avalon says to appease him, but she is happy he seems much better. 

His lips upturn slightly. “You are lying. You are glad she humiliated this Sesshomaru.” 

“You are right.” Avalon shrugs with a small smile on her face. “I’m glad she helped you but I wish you didn’t feel humiliation because of it. I should find out what is in it, so I can use it to help you in the future, if it is ever needed.” 

He stares at the ceiling and shakes his head. “We cannot leave as quickly as I would have preferred. I need to rest here. You will sleep where you please.” 

“What do you mean? You don’t want me by you?” 

“I said you will sleep where it pleases you.” 

“So I can be with you.” Avalon smiles relieved that he wasn’t pissed at her. 

He slides the stump back into the water sighing in relief. “Do not think you have earned forgiveness.” His eyes shutter again, resting. 

“I’m trying here, I really am. I know how things are supposed to go but I don’t want to tell everything and then mess something up and then something happens that can’t be fixed.” She moves to be in front of him placing a hand on his right shoulder. “I wouldn’t know what to do if something were to happen to you. I’m sorry. It’s very confusing and I’m just trying the best I can.” She looks at him beseechingly. 

His lids lazily open his eyes look in hers. His palm comes up her shoulder. “You have feelings about this Sesshomaru?” 

“Of course I do.” She smiles at him. ‘Such an idiot.’ “I care a great deal about you.” 

He sits grimacing again, the pain has reduced to a dull ache from his shoulder down into his abdomen. “You cannot control the flow of time Avalon,” he picks up a bar of soap and tosses it in the water, creating new ripples. “Something new, changes the path of time. It is good you care for this Sesshomaru.” 

“I know every new variable changes things. I just hoped to minimize my effect while still staying alive. You may annoy me at times Sesshomaru, but you bring me comfort. Your aura, as odd as it sounds soothes me. Well...not when you're angry.” She grins at him playfully. 

He gazes at her cockily, cupping her chin and pulling her mouth down to his, long enough to taste the steam on her lips before pulling back. He takes her hand setting it on his left shoulder and says no more. 

Avalon nods her head and lets her body rest against his. Her head is on his right shoulder while embracing him. 

He traces circles on her bare back with the tip of his middle finger. “Why did you lie to this Sesshomaru?” 

“You mean why didn’t I just say I was from the future? I feared you would have never believed me. You hardly trusted my words to begin with. I can only imagine what a confession of, ‘I’m from the future’ would have brought upon my neck. You seemed quite fond of crushing it.” 

“You seemed quite fond of attempting to control me. What did you think would happen if you attempted to manipulate time?” He inhales the top of her hair. “By saying nothing, it was you who suffered for it.” 

“I wanted you to get Bakusaiga as soon as possible. It is the key to being able to defeat Naraku. I would rather suffer than ever give him an edge. He may have controlled my body but he never controlled my mind,” she says bitterly. “His ears can be anywhere. I couldn’t risk just giving everything away to you and him hearing it. And for that I am sorry. I never really wanted to control you, Sesshomaru. Not like you thought,” her voice softens. 

“He controlled enough for you to attack this Sesshomaru when he was already injured.” 

“Yes and I can never express how sorry I am for attacking you, but do you know how many times he tried to get me to tell him more? He knew I knew more than I let on and his abuse would escalate when I would not give him what he wished. He tried to break me mentally but I wouldn’t, because it would harm you and others if I did. I had hoped you would have defeated me easily. I had accepted the fact you were likely to kill me and I was okay with it.” 

“You only gained the upper hand because I am missing one.” He sits up and takes a cloth off the side of the bath handing it to her. “We will find and destroy him.” 

“Do you mean to say I could still defeat you now.” Her eyes spark with mischief and her question is playful as she takes the cloth in her hand. 

“Do you not know what to do with a washcloth?” He palms his own forehead. “This will be like training a child. You would not have gained the upper hand had I not been injured.” 

Avalon sloshes the cloth in the water grabbing the soap and starting to rub his chest. “I know what to do with a washcloth. And do you not know how to play? I know I can’t take you now.” She rolls her eyes as she continues to wash his body. “I am stubborn but I’m also playful with my words. Please try not to take everything so seriously, especially when I say something so obviously errored.” She shrugs her shoulders. “I’m not an idiot Sesshomaru.” 

“A bird that never stops chirping,” he says flatly, turning so she can wash his back. 

“Chirp, chrip, chrip,” she says softly. “If you say so.” 

He groans, resting his forehead in his bicep, facing away from Avalon. 

Avalon continues washing him in silence. The cloth moves down his back and around him, rubbing his abs and his manhood, paying particular attention to it. She finds herself becoming aroused by washing his body.

He shifts, moving her hand off his shaft, still annoyed with her and unsure of his choice to bond her. Concessions and compromises have to be made. “Is this what you wanted Avalon? To be bound to a youkai?” 

Avalon huffs. “I never had any intentions of such a thing. If that were my goal, wouldn’t I have just stayed with Naraku,” she says bitterly. “I didn’t even know such a thing was possible.” She continues washing, moving on to his butt and then his legs. 

“I had planned on someone like me,” he says flatly standing up to make cleaning easier for her, while staring at his reflection in a mirror across the room. ‘Flawless perfection?’ he thinks to himself. ‘With one arm…’ he rubs it again, willing it to grow back. 

“Well sorry to disappoint,” Avalon says bitterly. “Please lift your leg Sesshomaru-sama,” she adds the  _ sama, _ like it's an insult. 

He lifts his left leg, glancing down at her pouting. “You are childish.” 

Avalon scrubs his left foot not answering him. Finishing with the foot she says, “Other leg please.” 

He raises the other. “Should I do less than my father did and leave no pureblooded heir behind?” 

Avalon scrubs the right foot. “Why do you need a pureblooded heir anyway? You were brought about because your mother was in heat. So did your father have you because of that or because he wanted an heir?” 

“Both. It is not our custom to not leave at least one behind.” He sits back down pointing at his hair for her to wash. 

Avalon grabs his hair, getting it wet. “What do you want me to wash it with? Where I come from we have shampoo but here you don’t.” 

“Champoo?” he tries to repeat the word. He comes to a sudden realization, “this is not your mother tongue.” 

“Nope it’s not.” she rolls her eyes. “My mother tongue is English. You knew my accent was imperfect. I remember a very choking moment where you told me so.” 

He smirks, caressing her neck with the back of his hand, then pulling on her upper arm to get her into his lap.“Sesshomaru!” she says surprised with him pulling her into his lap. She isn’t sure she is okay with it and stands to get off his lap. 

His eyebrows knit together cautiously as he takes her wrist again and tugs gently this time. “Sit with me.” 

She slowly lowers herself into the water, sitting beside him. 

He wraps his arm around her waist and lifts her back into his lap. “Inu-youkai enjoy having their mates close,” he says reassuringly. “I am not aroused right now. You need not fear me.” 

Avalon purses her lips. “Please don’t just grab me suddenly like that. It makes me very uncomfortable,” she says ashamed.

He slides down in the water, staring at the ceiling instead of at Avalon. “For now, I will comply. In time, you will accept my nature. We are sensual and sometimes aggressive, possessive with our mates.” 

“I’m sorry. I really am not trying to change you, it's just it reminds me of how I was treated before. I know you won’t force me, like he did but he would…” Avalon trails off with tears pricking at her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she says quietly. 

He curls his fingers around her chin, wiping the tears with his thumb. “You agreed to submit and share your pain with this Sesshomaru. Does it help to speak about it? I know your strength. You bear no shame from what was done to you.” 

“I don’t know if talking about it would help,” she says sadly as her face contorts with pain. 

“Then find comfort against me. Rest.” He leans back in the water, sighing at the heat. “I enjoy baths. Tell me about your land, this time you came from, how you came here.” He tickles her side, his claws dancing up her skin, making her laugh. He dips his nose into her neck, and licks the skin beneath her ear as if he is apologizing. “Rest and share your life with me.” He pats his chest for her to rest against. 

Avalon nods her head and rests her head against his chest, “Alright, well where I’m from there are no youkai which makes things confusing. I don’t know if they don’t exist or if they are hidden.” 

He takes in what she is saying, wondering what happened to his kind. He combs her wet hair with his claws again, taking out the tangles. “Continue.” 

Avalon shiveres at the contact. It was rather stimulating for her. “We have been to the moon. We fly through the sky in giant vehicles called planes. We can communicate with someone on the other side of the world instantaneously. We have advanced medicine and science. My life wasn’t so grand. I was a freelance translator. You asked before how I got here, I didn’t lie then and I’m not lying now, it was a portal and I don’t know who or how it was created.” 

His mind is swimming, the moon, humans flying, communicating with other people, but translator, that word was also new. “Portal?” For reasons beyond him it makes him hold her tighter. “You don’t wish to create another one and return? You have endured too much pain here.” 

“I don’t know how to. Plus I feel like I should be here. Even with everything I’ve been through I just feel like there must be a reason for me being here. It probably sounds stupid,” she says sadly but enjoying the way he is holding her tightly. “I really like being with you Sesshomaru. I don’t want to leave you.” A blush blooms over her cheeks. 

His chest suddenly warms with an emotion he is not familiar with at her admission and the change of color in her cheeks. He nudges her face up to his with his nose and captures her lips, luxuriating in the kiss. “If you want to return. I will find a way. Perhaps this has all been for a purpose.” He touches her red cheek. “You have feelings for this Sesshomaru. Why?” 

“I…you...I mean...well...you saved my life for one. You have shown me kindness and I feel happy when I’m with you. I don’t know.” She shrugs, uncomfortable explaining why she had feelings for him. She just did. 

He kisses the top of her head. “More. What is this language called?” 

“It’s called English.” She smiles at him, happy for the change in subject 

“Engolish?” he awkwardly forms the name of the language. He sits up, so he can see her face. “Say something in Eeengolish.” 

“Hello, my name is Avalon.” she says in English. 

“What does it mean?” His cheeks twitch, inching into a smile. ‘I only smile in battle.’ 

“I said hello and introduced myself.” she says.

“Teach me.” He licks his lips as he stares at hers. They were so full and enticing. He leans closer, pressing his mouth against hers. “Again.” 

Avalon says, “ _ Hello _ ,” in english then says, “Kon'nichiwa.” 

“Hellow,” he repeats the word slowly. 

“ _ My name is,” _ she says in english then says, “ Watashinonamaeha.” 

“My nem ees Sesshomaru,” he says proudly. 

Avalon smiles at him. “Not bad.” She brushes her lips against his. 

He deepens the kiss, pulling her body more tightly against his, and then breaks it when he feels himself starting to twitch below. “I want to know more about the moon and humans flying, and how you talk to someone on the other side of the world,” he stops. “How big is the world?” ‘Can the world be my kingdom?’ 

“Well the moon is smaller than the planet and spins around it. The earth orbits the sun. Humans fly in a metal tube with wings.” She laughs at the funny description. “I think it would be better if I drew what it looks like. We can communicate in many ways. We have things called, ‘computers, cell phones, and tablets,’” she uses the english words for the devices. “The world is really, really big. I don’t know the exact dimensions but I know compared to Japan it's immeasurable. There are 7 continents.”

He tries to imagine how big the world is, but is extremely distracted by the beauty in his lap. He finally allows himself a small smirk and tickles her behind her left ear. “Say what this is in Engolish.” 

“It’s called an  _ ear _ ,” she says pushing his hand away from it giggling. 

“Elo,” he tries to copy the word. He tickles it again, making his claws dance around the lobe and her neck. 

Avalon lifts her shoulder and pushes her head down to protect her ear and neck from him tickling her, “No it sounds like ir.” 

“Eeealo,” he groans frustrated and moves on to pinching her nose, shaking it lightly between his ring and index finger. “What’s this?” 

“Nose,” she sounds it out slowly for him, “n..oo..s.” 

“Noss,” he licks his lip again and then kisses her cheek raising an eyebrow. “This.” His lips linger on her cheek. 

“ _ Cheek _ .” She sounds it out, “Chi..k” 

“Cheeeeek.” He threads his fingers through her hair, slides his tongue over her lips, then kisses her passionately. He pulls back only far enough to whisper, “these?” then takes her lips again. 

Avalon runs her fingers over her lips. “These are  _ ‘lips’ _ .” She leans in and kisses him. “What we did is  _ ‘kiss’ _ .” Her cheeks dust a slight pink 

“Lips,” he says easily, “kisss,” he leans back again then touches his chest over his heart. “It’s warm.” He closes his eyes examining the feeling, trying to dissect it. “I am fond of you.” 

“I am fond of you too Sesshomaru. I enjoy being with you. And when we aren’t fighting I am very happy being with you. You make me feel safe and warm,” Avalon says with a smile 

“We would not fight if you did not omit. We are different,” he says ruefully. “Is this okay? You aren’t scared?” He runs his fingers up and down her back. 

“We fight because we are different and have different values but I still worry about telling you everything I know about the future especially since I don’t know if it will change anything. How can I be sure...like, I know you will fight people in the future and you will win but if I tell you how it happens, what happens if you expect that and somehow I’m wrong and then something happens to you? It feels good.” 

“You must forget what you think you know and let things happen as they do.” He rests his head against hers beginning to relax more. “No more omissions.” 

“I can’t forget what I think I know when I see things playing out as I see them. Do you know what deja vu is?” 

“Dayja voo? This is Engolish?” 

“Actually I think the word is French. But it means that you see something happening that you are sure you have already seen before. Or you are doing something but you swear you already did it.” 

“I know this feeling.” 

“Well it’s kind of like that for me. I see things playing out and then a thought crosses my mind of what will happen next. I guess I remember everything but it’s not always accessible but sometimes something happens or a question is asked and then the memory pops into my mind. I don’t want to omit anything from you any longer but I can’t just tell you everything I remember. Ahhh, am I making any sense here?” she asks frustrated. 

He shrugs his shoulders, not really understanding what she is saying. “No more omissions,” he admonishes her again. 

Avalon fixes her eyes to his. “I will try not to omit anything anymore. I will be honest and not hide anything from you and as thoughts come up about what I remember I will tell you.” 

“It is acceptable. The child,” he asks her quietly cupping water to run down her back. “The orphan, the one who will help me obtain Bakusaiga. Who is she?” 

“Ah, her name is Rin. She is an orphan. Her family was murdered by bandits. I’m not sure how to find her since the way you find her originally probably won’t happen. We will have to search for her. She is important to you, she really is. If we are unable to find her on our own we can follow Kagome and your a…. Anyway we can follow them to find a wolf demon, named Koga. His pack will kill her and you would have used Tenseiga to bring her back to life.” 

“You would let the child die?” 

Avalon looks at him with hurt in her eyes. “I don’t want anything to happen to her! I just don’t know how else to find her.” 

“We will hunt Naraku.” He hugs her tightly, again feeling more emotions than he can process and a growing arousal he wants satiated. “How do I manifest the sword?” 

Avalon thins her lips, trying to think of the best way to convey it to him. “I know it is a moment of desperation--” 

“This Sesshomaru is never desperate,” he says, offended. 

“No? What about when I ran my sword through you? There will be an opponent that is not mortal. He cannot be defeated in a normal way but you will try and he will come closer than I to taking your life.” 

“For now,” he says pensively, “do not tell me about this opponent until the time is closer. You have already made a big enough mess with time. If this Sesshomaru were to become ‘desperate’,” he wants to spit at the word, “is that all?” 

“No.” She places her hand on his heart. “You have to love, have compassion, feel rage and sorrow for someone other than yourself and know the value of life. All life. Youkai and ningen, even hanyou.” 

“I hate humans,” he falls back against the bath losing his arousal. “They stink, they ravage, they are honorless. Hanyous...abominations.” 

“Do you hate me?” Avalon says with hurt in her voice. 

“I am fond of you,” he says quietly, pulling her face up to his. “Even before. You make this Sesshomaru feel,” he pauses again. “Proud, even when the pain comes and I can’t stand. I am less embarrassed with you.” 

“Why? What is different about me? I mean, you were fond of me before the bonding. What about me affected you? Why didn’t you hate me?” 

“You’re strong. You fought back when the samurai took you. You are not like most ningen women.” 

“I killed him while I was tied up,” she says playfully. 

“Very resourceful.” He runs his hand along her stomach, feeling her muscles. “You are strong.” 

“Will you hate our children if I conceive?” she asks sadly. 

“You can’t conceive,” he says blandly. 

“I don’t know if I can or not.” she says lowering her eyes. “It's possible that I could.” 

He growls, lowering himself in the water and gazes off at the wall. “I do not want an abomination as offspring.” 

“Can hanyous have children?” Avalon asks curiously, trying to hide the hurt she feels. ‘He would think our children are abominations.’ 

“I assume so,” he pauses, “they are usually killed before maturity.” 

“Why?” she gasps shocked that children would be killed 

“Why allow something with tainted blood to live?” 

“But they are living beings. They have every right to live. If I conceive, will you try to make me miscarry?” she asks with tears in her eyes feeling a growing pain in her heart. “Will our children be killed? Will you be the one to do it?” The agonizing pain grips her heart. ‘Could he really be that cold to kill his own children? Will I have to fight him to protect them?’ 

He grabs her wrist forcefully. “I will not harm you or allow others to. Why must I answer these questions now? This is not what I wanted, to be bound to a human, to bed a human, to feel for a human. You cannot give this Sesshomaru time to adapt?” His voice raises in anger with each word. ‘What does she expect from me?’ 

“I’m sorry. I just...I’m sorry,” she says, trying to take her wrist back fearful and crying. 

“You said you could not have children,” he says accusingly. He’s taken by a sudden wave of fury and jealousy, He hauls her up by the wrist, pulling her to stand. “Do not move.” He sniffs her neck, down her chest, across her stomach and stops at her opening, inhaling deeply through his nose the tip brushing against her slit. “You are not pregnant with his child?” 

“No, I don’t think so. When did I ever say I could not have children?” she says, still crying in his grasp. Fear, hurt, and anger course through her. 

He brings her closer, holding the small of her back and breathes in the scent of her opening again. “I would be able to scent it by now.” He lays an apologetic kiss on her lower lips, then caresses one lip with his thumb raising an eyebrow. “You removed the hair?” 

“I did, I thought you might like it.” she says still angry by the way he was treating her and still hurting from his previous words. 

“You are angry with me,” he says, more easily able to smell it from where he kneels. He rests his crescent moon against her belly and says, “I heard you tell Hikari, you cannot have children. Is it because of the violations? Did they damage you?” 

“You were spying on me?” she whispers. 

He nods. “To watch you and the girl. I was fascinated with you. Did they damage you?” he asks again, holding his hand over her stomach. 

“Not in that way, I have a condition called, endometriosis. It makes conception very hard. Sometimes impossible but not always. I could potentially conceive. It’s slim but there is a chance,” she confesses. “I told Hikari I didn’t think I could, not that I can’t,” she says quietly. 

“Perhaps my yoki will heal this condition.” He sits back against the tub, holding her wrist. “Rest against me.” 

Avalon sits in the tub and rests her head against his chest. “I just need to know if you will be the enemy. I’m not asking you to love them...just not want to kill them,” she sobs against his chest. 

He shakes his head. “I make no such promises, but I will not allow harm to come to you. I need time, Avalon. You are not fertile now. You will not conceive from what happened this morning.” 

“You will warn me if I am and we will abstain during that time,” Avalon says firmly to him. 

He nods again. “We will abstain. How was Naraku unable to impregnate you? If you are so worried now, why were you not worried then?” 

“I was worried a little about it but I have a device in my arm right here,” she points to a spot under her arm. “It prevents pregnancy on top of my condition but it only works for so long. In another two years it will be ineffective. Plus I don’t know how yoki will affect it.” 

“Why take such a device if you did not engage in physical relations before? Were you fearful of being violated again? Even in your time?” 

“Yes and no. I took precautions to keep myself safe but the fear always lingers in the back of your mind. The device wasn’t for that though. Endometriosis is painful and the device helps to stop the progress so it helps stop the pain. It’s hard to understand unless you are very familiar with the condition.” 

“Do you hurt now? Did you hurt before and not tell me?” 

“I’m not hurting now but I have hurt in the past but why would I tell you? It wouldn’t have helped either of us.” 

He shakes his head and holds her hand against his chest. “Before, when I wanted you for pleasure. You would not tell until you were pressed that you had pain here,” he cups her womanhood gently and un-sensuously. “I...you did not need to walk for days with that pain.” 

Avalon shrugs. “I was embarrassed and didn’t want to complain. I didn’t want to show weakness.” 

“You know nothing of this Sesshomaru. I should ask before I touch you.” He removes his hand. “I did not see you as weak, but those injuries. I would have found a healer, or cleaned them myself.” 

“Yeah you should ask, you messed me up when you just licked me down there without my consent,” she says softly while looking away from him. 

“Forgive me. I did not understand.” His hand dips into the water cupping her again tenderly. “Now? Do you fear my touch?” 

“Not when you are being gentle with me and I’m not opposed to some roughness during intercourse but when you just grab me and pull me around it frightens me.” 

“Will you give me time then?” His hand retreats again. “To know you better? To become comfortable siring a hanyou?” 

“I will give you time, just don’t get me pregnant any time soon.” She smiles gently at him looking in his eyes. “Because once I am, I will expect you to be comfortable with it.” 

He groans not liking the idea of having a hanyou for a child. “You ask too much.”

“You have time,” she says softly. “I’m not ready to have a child yet either.” 

He shakes his head at the mess he’s made and the confusion running through his veins. “The child, the orphan,” he’s desperate for a change of subject. “Will she be like you? Like Hikari? Violated?” 

“No, she just witnesses her family slaughtered by thieves,” Avalon says sadly 

“Why must I collect wounded souls?” He sinks lower in the water, wanting to drown himself. 

“Because healing that soul helps you connect to your compassion,” Avalon says, brushing her lips against his under the water. 

He rises up slightly returning the kiss. “Feel compassion, father that which I hate, bond what this Sesshomaru didn’t want. This is not who I am.” 

“And who are you Sesshomaru?” Avalon asks looking into his eyes 

“Warrior, I care for no one, therefore I have no weakness. There is no strength in compassion. Only death.” 

Avalon shakes her head sadly. “A warrior can have compassion and caring for someone can be a weakness but also give you strength you never knew you had. I can’t convince you of this but time might.” 

“You ask too much of this Sesshomaru,” he says ruefully. 

“If you say so,” Avalon says, runs her hand up along his chest and then down again to his abs before kissing him on the neck and then trailing a path with her mouth to his lips. 

He returns the kiss, growing more aroused by the way their bodies slide against each other. “I will compromise,” he speaks between savoring her lips. “Give this Sesshomaru time to accept fathering a hanyou with you and in return, you will consider allowing me to take another of my own kind to give me a pureblooded child.” 

“I will consider it, but you have time. You just have to warn me of my fertility. Even with a device, it’s not full proof.” 

He nods and considers what she has been telling him and her knowledge of the future. “Am I so different that I would father a hanyou in this future of yours?” 

“You are. You love the little girl. You don’t hate your half brother and you get along with humans,” she confesses looking into his eyes. 

“And you expect this of me now?” He moves away from her lips, trying to ignore his growing erection. 

Avalon shakes her head. “No, I can’t, that isn’t who you are. That’s why I’m fine with giving you time.” 

He sits up again, instead of shirking in the water. “Enough,” he mutters feeling a twinge of pain in his stump. “We are not what the other expected. But you have already seen this Sesshomaru in pain, whining like a dog, without making me feel less than what I am. For that, I am grateful.” 

Avalon smiles. “I won’t tell anyone and I’m glad. You shouldn’t feel any less, because of this.” She kisses his left shoulder. 

He tilts his lips into her neck and whispers, “your scent, makes it easier to bear.” He glowers at his missing arm, wondering why she would have affections for someone so physically flawed. “Does this come back?” he asks, pointing at the stump. 

“Would it bother you if it doesn’t?” she asks looking into his eyes. 

“It would be inconvenient. I will adapt. Did it grow back?” 

“It does when you manifest Bakusaiga. However, not having your left arm doesn’t seem to hinder you that much,” she says kissing the below his left shoulder on his bicep. 

He groans at the contact against the already sensitive skin. Somehow it’s erotic and burns at the same time. “Mmh,” he stares down at her with soft eyes. “You will help this Sesshomaru. That feels good.” 

“Hmm?” she kisses the stump again but then slides her tongue out and licks his arm up to his shoulder. 

He winces when her tongue touches the base where his skin is still the most tender, but gasps as her tongue slides up to his shoulder. 

“I’m sorry,” she whispers and kisses above the area that hurt. 

He nods, unsure if he wants her to continue to explore the stump. It was both pleasurable and painful. “The water helps,” he whispers, eyes locked on Avalon’s. 

Avalon nods cupping water and letting it trickle down his bicep and kissing the trail it leaves but stopping short or where it hurt him. Her fingers move gingerly along the stump continuing to avoid the lowest part. 

“So you can be quiet,” he mutters as she works on his stump. 

“When I want to,” she says playfully while her lips brush along his shoulder and into his neck sucking on his skin. 

He relaxes against her body and the motions of her mouth against his skin, “I am used to solitude and silence. You chatter like a bird.”   
“I can be quiet too if you need but I don’t respond well to being physically silenced. I’m sorry,” she says softly against his neck licking and sucking on the skin. 

He chuckles leaning against her mouth. “Birds are quieter than you.” 

Avalon backs off to level a playful glare at him, turning away and not saying anything. 

“We will remain until the pain subsides,” he says and then tickles her stomach, pinning her against the wall of the tub. ‘Let’s see how quiet you can be chatty Onaga.’ He laughs internally at the name. She chatters as much as a magpie. 

Avalon grits her teeth, holding back laughter. She nods her head acknowledging what he said as mischief dances in her eyes. 

He raises an eyebrow, flicking his tongue across his fangs, then digs them into her neck, clamping down, while sliding his hand under her knee, tickling just below her thigh. 

Avalon wiggles in his grasp and she reaches back to tickle his abs still holding her laugh back. 

He isn’t ticklish, but he isn’t going to tell her that. He decides to heighten the game, by ducking under the water and nipping at her stomach. He clamps down on the tilt of her ribs, then the center of her belly and beneath her navel, his fangs leaving imprints as he goes. 

Avalon eyes sparkle and bulge as she holds back the laugh threatening to break through. 

He slides his hand up her thigh, while digging into her hip, tingling her skin with his claws, wondering when she will stop him. 

Avalon wonders how to get him to stop. He is driving her insane. The little nips make her want to laugh but she is trying so hard to prove she can be quiet. She tries tickling his neck. 

Instead of going further down he nips his way back up heading for her chest while his fingers come dangerously close to her heat. He tickles the inside of her groin, while taking a breath of air and nibbling on her ribs again. 

Avalon’s thighs slam together around his hand trying to stop him. She flushes with excitement and embarrassment. 

His head pops out of the water feeling his claw dig into her skin from the force of her legs closing. “Stand up, sit on the ledge.” 

Avalon breath calms down and she does as he asks wondering why. 

“Open.” He tugs on her knee. 

“Why?” she finally asks. 

He holds up his right hand. “They’re very sharp. I felt your skin break. Open. Let this Sesshomaru check.” 

Avalon nods her head and opens her legs from him and quickly closes them again. “Warn me before you do anything,” she says again, opening them for him to see. 

He sets his hand on her hip, next to her stomach and pulls the skin back, revealing two deep gashes in her groin. “Forgive me. Does it hurt?” 

“It was an accident, nothing to forgive. It stings a little. How bad is it?” she asks, bending awkwardly trying to see for herself. 

“They went straight in,” he says tenderly. “They are deep, not wide.” He moves closer between her legs. “Let me care for the sting.” 

“You’re going to lick me aren’t you?” she asks. 

He nods. “My yoki is already healing it, but it will care for the lingering pain and close the skin faster. Have you not been tasted before?” 

Avalon face falls. “You were the first and he…” she swallows the sudden grief. “He was determined to make me beg,” she says looking away. 

He nods, turning her face back to his. “You will not beg. You are not my pet but the mate of this Sesshomaru. Will you allow me to clean it?” 

Avalon nods closing her eyes before slowly opening them back up. 

“I will only clean the cuts.” He moves forward, widening her left leg to expose the leaking gashes. His mouth covers them as he swirls his tongue into the cuts. He holds her leg from behind the knee, slowly running his hand up and down her thigh. 

Avalon gasps at the way he is being so gentle with her. It feels delightful. She starts becoming wet with desire. 

He stops when he feels the skin beginning to close and then grabs her under the arm, splashing them both into the water, and tickles under her arm, while trying to keep her head above the water. 

Avalon laughs out while struggling to get away from him. 

He holds her in place for a few minutes before he loses his grip, compliments of only having one arm to try to hold and tickle with. He lets her go and catches her around the stomach, landing on his bottom deeper in the water. He turns her around and gingerly kisses her lips, massaging her scalp with his hand, then he pulls back. “Ea...rs,” he caresses her left earlobe. “Noss,” he nibbles on the tip of her nose. “Leeps.” His thumb skids along her bottom lip. “Kiss?” He cocks an eyebrow in invitation. 

Avalon leans towards him and whispers, “Kiss,” before crashing her lips into his. Her hands move along his abs and then they go lower grasping his member. She was still aroused from earlier. She strokes him under the water. 

He grunts at the contact, enjoying the way the hot water and her hand slide along his skin. He hitches her hips closer to his and slides his hand up her side, jiggling her breasts with his finger. “And these?” 

Avalon smiles while her hand keeps up the motion on his cock. “ _ Breasts _ ,” she says seductively. 

“Buroreastsss. Strange language.” He grabs her face and smashes his lips into hers, while pumping his hips into her hands. “You want this?” He breathes into her neck. “You crave intimacy?” 

“I do,” she says softly. She focuses on her body's desires and the way he makes her feel. She takes her hand off his erection and moves her center to drag along his hard erection feeling the way the water helps everything slide. 

“So brave,” he mutters into her neck, rocking with her, enjoying the smooth texture of her skin. He had a craving for something else this time. “Lay back,” Sesshomaru commands her. 

Avalon nods leaning back and laying with her head just above the water. “I still need to see your face and eyes,” she whispers nervously. “When we...you know...um...when you’re inside me,” she adds. 

He leans over lovingly, taken by a wave of compassion and possession. He kisses her mouth slowly and gently. “You will see my face. Let me taste you, Avalon. This Sesshomaru will taste you.” 

“Okay,” her cheeks flush red. “Gosh I’m acting like a virgin,” she says embarrassed. 

Sesshomaru ducks under the water, kissing between her breasts and makes his way down, till he is at her center. He slides his tongue along her now bare skin enjoying the odd, smooth, sensation. He licks a couple of times familiarizing himself with the way his tongue slides so easily against her skin. His tongue dips into her folds, lapping at her center. He comes back up to take a breath. He looks at her eyes trying to see if she was still okay. He could smell no fear and Avalon’s eyes seem to only be gazing curiously at him. He takes another breath going back down to lap at her center. He offers her his striped hand in place of his eyes and face as he sucks harder on her bud. ‘Trust me.’ 

Avalon spreads her legs further for him. She grabs his hand, lowering their joined hands below the water. She is enjoying the newness, the freshness. No one was pressuring her, no one was forcing her. She wasn’t being told to beg. She relaxes into the feel of his tongue plunging into her core. She could feel the tightening in her abdomen. The warmth floods her core. Avalon’s breath starts to hitch and her hips buck under Sesshomaru’s skilled mouth. 

Sesshomaru comes back up for another breath of air, taking in her eyes for the brief moment he surfaces. There is something emboldening about the way she trusts him. He ducks under again attacking her core and clit with his tongue and lips. He slides his shoulders under her legs, widening her for him, until she is stretched and taught, giving him better access to her clit and core. 

Avalon can feel herself nearing her bliss as the dam bursts, her hips rock uncontrollably into his mouth and then her body goes slack as she relaxes letting the ecstasy wash over her. 

Sesshomaru tastes the sweet juices she releases. It is maddening to him. His cock is throbbing, begging to penetrate her. He surfaces, sliding up her body until he is pressed against her lower lips. “Avalon?” he gently calls. “Are you ready?” 

Avalon’s eyes slowly open to look at him. “Hmm?”

He brings himself up and positions his cock at her entrance and brushes it against her opening. He doesn’t want to ask but he doesn’t want to scare her. He is painfully hard. 

Avalon nods her head, knowing what he is asking but not wanting to voice aloud. 

He pushes into her slowly. Avalon’s core constricts around his cock. The moment she has him, he gasps, his mouth falling open and warmth blooming in his chest. He lowers his nose into her neck again and slowly begins thrusting into her. “Avalon,” he moans her name again, unable to fathom how she can make him feel like this. In the past it would take many women, sometimes four or five and somehow this human was giving him exactly what he needed. ‘How do you do this to me?’ 

Avalon wraps her legs around him pulling his cock and body closer to her. Her hands weave into his hair as her head dips to reach his lips. “I need to see you,” she pants out. 

“Shh,” he coos into her neck, lifting himself back up and laces her lips with his own. “It’s me.” He takes her hand and slides it between their two bodies. “Touch yourself.” 

Avalon slides her finger along her clit looking at Sesshomaru. She pants with desire, her walls contract and her hips buck each time she strokes herself. 

The combination of the contractions and the smooth texture of each thrust, intensifies the pleasure and he gasps, so shocked that she feels like she was made for him. Her walls fit and heat him, he struggles to keep from burying his nose in her neck again. He comes within five quick thrusts, filling her, clinging to her hips, holding her on his cock. After a few moments he lets Avalon’s hip go and she slumps back in the water with a pleased smile on her face.

“Are you okay?” Sesshomaru asks her. 

Avalon nods. “Yeah I’m good.” She was so happy to not have panicked. ‘Maybe I can have a normal sex life.’ 

“Very good.” He kisses her once more and sits down, pulling her into his chest, still breathing heavily. “Did it hurt this time?” 

“No,” she smiles gazing up at him. “It didn’t hurt at all.” 

“You are mine,” he says again thoughtfully, beginning to feel tired and latent stabs of pain in the stump. “Hmm,” he rolls it, trying to shake the pain. “Mother will care for Hikari until Naraku is destroyed. She will be safe here, lonely, but safe. There are no humans here.” 

“Why do you do that?” Avalon asks with hurt in her voice. 

“Do what?” 

“Say that I am yours?” she asks. 

“Because you are. It is not an insult. I have told you this before. It is an honor.” 

“I am not against being at your side but I’m not a thing, I'm a person.”

“I did not call you a ‘thing’.” He sits up so he can see her face. “You are mine. You are connected to this Sesshomaru. Why do you pick fights when we make love?” He gets out of the water quickly, grabbing a towel. ‘Stubborn, obstinate.’ 

“I’m not wanting to fight Sesshomaru.” Avalon sighs, unhappily “You just don’t get it.” 

“You do not ‘get it’,” he mocks her words and begins trying to dry his hair with one hand and becomes frustrated quickly, throwing it across the room. 

“No your right I don’t.” ‘At least I can admit it.’ 

He moves onto his clothing, despite his hair dripping all over them. He tugs his hakama on and ties them, then throws his inner layer over his stump and slides his other arm in. ‘I should not have bonded a human.’ 

“You want me to dry your hair? I don’t mind.” Avalon steps out of the water grabbing a towel. 

He growls, sitting down, feeling undignified dripping on everything. 

Avalon walks over and gently dries his hair. “I’m sorry,” she says quietly. “I am honored to be your mate, I feel no shame in that. I just don’t get ownership,” she continues drying his hair. 

“Would you prefer  _ his  _ ownership?” he says coldly. “One that takes you against your will, instead of one that cares for your needs before his own? Is that what you want? Or is that how you see this Sesshomaru?” 

Avalon drops the towel shocked at his words. She goes to be in front of him to look him in his eyes. “It’s not the same and you know it. I don’t think of you like that. Just no one owns anyone where I’m from. I have been taking care of myself since I was seventeen. I never looked to anyone to provide for me. Please? I’m sorry, I need time too,” Avalon says pleadingly. 

He shakes his head, wondering why his heart aches now. Instead of speaking he buries his forehead in his palm, feeling the pain coming back into his stump. “I will care for you now. Why is this shameful for you?” the words come out through gritted teeth. 

“It’s not shameful, just against my nature. I was independent before my rape and after it and before my parents died. They always told me I was a strong, independent woman and to be proud of that. Even though I’m sure I drove them crazy at times. It’s not shameful to have someone care for you and I’m not ashamed of it,” she says sincerely trying to get him to understand. 

“You lack pride in it. Come,” he shakes his head, both sadly and annoyed with her. “If you wish to sleep in my room, I will show you to it.” 

“Alright but should I dress before we go?” she asks playfully. 

He waves his hand at her. “I’ll be outside.” 

“Okay,” she says as her hand slides along his neck and she brings her lips to his. 

He pulls away from the kiss. “Get dressed,” he bites out as he leaves the room. 

Avalon takes a deep breath trying to not be hurt by him pulling away from her. She grabs a towel and wraps up her hair and puts on clean yukata and steps out grabbing her modern clothing and then sees Sesshomaru waiting for her. 

He leads her down the hall and then to a room to the left, sliding the door open and then closed behind them. “Those are for you,” he says, holding his hand out to the side where ten packages are wrapped in brown paper. He lays down on his futon, picking up a scroll that Jaken had left for him and begins reading. 

Avalon’s eyebrow raises, completely unsure of what he is trying to do. “What did I do to deserve this?” she asks while sitting indian style, taking one of the packages and opening it. 

He flicks his eyes over the scroll and then goes back to reading, still too angry to speak with her. 

She finds a piece of cloth and unfurls it, staring at a blue kimono with little white flowers. “A kimono?” She looks over at Sesshomaru and when he doesn’t say anything she opens another package finding another kimono. ‘What? A kimono for every day?’ She opens several more packages and finds more kimonos and stops opening the packages and puts one on. It was a pretty purple one with pink flowers that she was unfamiliar with. She walks over crawling on the futon. “What do you think? It's pretty. Thank you but what kind of flowers are these?” she asks pointing to the flower blossoms she was unfamiliar with. 

He glances over the scroll, taking in how it hugs her curves and brings out the shape of her face as he knew it would when he chose it. 

“Kinmokusei,” he says and then returns to the scroll, unconsciously rocking his left side to ease the growing burn. Tiny flickers of pain shoot up his stump into his jaw and across his chest. 

“Why did you get me so many gifts?” she asks curiously. 

He shrugs, not wanting to speak more, but the motion makes him wince. He can feel his body heating up again, so he tries to bury himself in the scroll he is reading. 

Avalon’s lips press together. She had caught the wince of pain. “Should I get another vial for you?” 

‘Does she think I would ask?’ Sesshomaru thinks frustrated, attempting to ignore it, but his body doesn’t let him. Small droplets of sweat form on his brow as his eyes stay trained on the scroll. 

Avalon sees the drops of sweat breaking out across his brow. She gets up off the futon and she goes to the door muttering “Stubborn,” under her breath. She opens it stepping out and closes it behind her. She looks for a servant and when she finds one “Excuse me, can you take me to Sesshomaru’s mother?”

The female looks at her haughtily but motions with her hand to follow. Avalon follows behind the female inu-youkai until she is led to a garden where the servant motions with her hand. Avalon looks out and sees her. She walks out slowly and cautiously approaching her. “Excuse me.” she says gingerly.

The inu-youkai looks up from her scroll. “Hmm, so you're no longer in the water with my son.”

“Uhm...no...the potion you gave him?”

“Yes?” Her lips curl up enjoying the way her new daughter was squirming under her gaze

“I need more,” Avalon finally gets out, trying to steady her overly exerted heart.

“You do? Come closer.” Gobodo-sama curls her finger beckoning Avalon closer.

Avalon slowly walks towards Gobodo, her heart pounding against her rib cage.

Once Avalon is close enough Gobodo reaches her hand out grabbing her wrist and yanks her down to the ground.

Avalon’s heart rate skyrockets.

“Here.” Gobodo-sama reaches into her sleeve pulling five vials from her sleeve, setting them in Avalon’s hand. “Now go,” she says dismissively, releasing Avalon from her grasp.

Avalon nods before dashing back to Sesshomaru’s room, her heart still pounding in her chest as she cradles the vials in her hand. 

Sesshomaru shakes and shivers in his bed, already taken by another flare of pain. It’s beyond his understanding, why it’s this bad and why it keeps happening. His mind floats back to when he bonded Avalon. He didn’t want her to experience pain as she healed but he didn’t know this would be the side effect, that he would be weakened so severely that he couldn’t cope with his own pain. His teeth chatter as he curls into a ball, hugging his stump. ‘I gave her my strength. I have nothing left.’ 

His white hanjuban is soaked through and so is his hakama. The world goes in and out of focus as pain swallows him. 

Avalon places all the vials down but one. She opens it and lifts his head so she can set the vial on his lip and turns it up so the fluid would run down his throat. “I’m sorry,” she whispers. 

He coughs and gags on the liquid, spitting most of it out through clenched teeth. He feels like he’s being flayed alive, burned from the inside out and his life force sucked from him. 

Avalon releases him and grabs another vial rushing back to him. She pulls him into her lap putting pressure on his stump. “Please, you need to drink this,” she says and pours a small amount over his gritted teeth. Not knowing the content, she was too scared to place it in her mouth. She waits for the small amount of liquid to flow through his teeth before pouring a little more. 

He can hear her voice, the one that is his, smell her near. He tastes the bitter liquid on his lips again and swallows it, only gagging slightly. He can’t stop shaking from the pain and the fever. “O…” he licks his dried lips. “Onaga,” the name seemed to stick when he said it in the bath. He reaches for her, holding her back so tightly, his claws dig into her kimono. 

‘Onaga?’ Avalon starts humming softly to him as she pours a little more of the liquid into his mouth. 

He chokes on the second round of liquid as he tries to swallow it. “G...g...gave it to...you.” He trembles. 

Avalon shakes her head confused by what he is saying and whispers. “Gave what?” She wraps her arm around him trying to stop his shaking. 

He seeks out her neck, luxuriating in her scent. “Yoki...for...p...p...pain.” He groans, gripping her more tightly, shredding the back of the kimono and grazing her skin, accidentally in the process. “Nothing...left.” 

Tears come to her eyes. “You idiot,” she says in English, not wanting to upset him further as she leans over, bringing her neck to his nose and wrapping him tighter in her embrace, not even caring that her back was damaged. 

“N...n...no pain,” he grits out, “enough p...pain...Avalon...enough...no...no more.” 

“Thank you,” she whispers over him, ‘But you should have let me die.’ 

He digs his nose into her neck, trying to calm himself as his temperature rises. “T...t...tired…” 

“Sleep, I won't go anywhere,” she says lovingly. 

“Humiliated,” he mutters, releasing her back and then sliding her kimono off her shoulder to find her skin. “S..sk...skin.” He shakes his head weakly back and forth. “H...hot.” 

Avalon pulls his juban and kimono off along with his hakama. She helps him in bed, to be more comfortable, while she slides down next to him. “Sorry,” she whispers. 

“Onaga.” He winds himself around her body. “S...sweet...Onaga...m...mine.” His breathing begins to slow as the vial dulls his pain. 

“Shh,” she soothes letting him rest. 

His eyes shutter and his breathing slows as his body relaxes against hers finding sleep. He finds peace in her arms and relief from his pain. 

Sesshomaru slowly begins to wake. He can feel bare skin against his cheek, smell Avalon’s scent and feels cool air washing over his body. He groans, feeling relief but still a dull ache in his stump. He opens and closes his eyes, sitting up to find himself naked. ‘Where are my clothes?’ He rubs his eyes, adjusting to the dark, scenting Avalon’s blood on his claws. ‘What did I do?’ He moves closer to her, searching her body for injuries. He rolls her softly to her side and fingers the tattered cloth and then sets her back. “Forgive me.” 

Avalon wakes when her stomach starts growling and gnawing. She blinks her eyes unable to see. “Sesshomaru?” she asks, when she realizes he isn't laying on her any longer. 

He takes her hand and squeezes her palm, then lets go and lights the fire in the corner of the room and the torches. “I hurt you?” 

“It’s alright. You didn’t mean to and it’s all my fault anyways,” she says guiltily. 

“Why?” he wonders what she had done in his euphoria that would make him lash out. 

“I took your yoki,” she says ashamed. “You should have just let me die.” 

He reaches into his trunk, putting on fundoshi only, then sits next to Avalon. “The fits will pass, eventually. You did not deserve the death I gave you. I wanted to take your pain.” 

Avalon shakes her head. “I already lived longer than I should have because you stepped in,” she says as tears slip from the side of her eyes. 

He lowers his head, drawing her into his shoulder. “Enough tears. Your life has value to this Sesshomaru.” 

“Why, I’m just a worthless ningen?” 

“Is that what he told you?” 

“No, it’s what you have said.” 

He lets her go shocked at his own cruelty. “I said this?” 

“What? You forget what you say? Do you think your words mean nothing to me? You think just because I have forgiven you for them, they don’t still hurt?” 

“When did I say it?” he asks, utterly confused. The days were beginning to blur from the fits of fever and pain. 

“You called me worthless numerous times more or less when we first met.”

“You knew how I felt about humans and followed me. Did you have no self-worth then that you allowed me to treat you like that?” 

“What choice did I have? I couldn’t go home. I would be treated as a whore if not worse if I was in a village.” 

“You did not want to go home,” he speaks gently, keeping his voice level, surprised by his own kindness now. 

“And if I asked you back then to help me get home you would have?” she asks skeptically. 

“After Yogan?” he says quietly. “Yes. I would have found one that could send you home. Even now,” he averts his eyes knowing it will hurt her and not wishing to see her pain. “This Sesshomaru wishes you to return.” 

“Of course you do,” she says broken hearted. “I’m only in your way.” 

He grabs her arm, turning back to her, furious. “No. Because you have experienced nothing but sorrow, because you were raped, because I could have stopped it and chose not to, because you were held captive and fear my touch, when you should revel in it. This time,” he slams his hand against the floor. “It is easy to live in, when you are dai-youkai and few can challenge you. Is it worth this pain? The scars you now bear?” 

“Could have stopped it? What do you mean by that?” she asks, confused. 

“I do not interfere in human matters. It is beneath this Sesshomaru. I could have stopped it sooner.” 

“Then why did you step in at all?” she asks, trying to stay calm. 

“Because you are strong. You did not want to die. You did not cower.” 

“Then it’s worth it,” she says, looking into his eyes. 

“Five months of rape and it’s worth it? You are foolish. How many times did he leave you in tears? Take you against your will? And now you are bound to this one? I do not love.” He begins pacing the room. “How is it worth it?” 

“My life is fleeting, was being raped for five months…” she chuckles darkly “Perhaps I really am a fool but if anything was gained from my pain it is worth knowing that I affected you. That you stepped in because you saw something in me.” 

“Do you see nothing in yourself? Did you think so little of yourself then?” 

“That isn’t it. People don’t get transported into another dimension for no reason. Portals don’t just randomly open. I have to believe there is some reason I’m here or I would go crazy. I would have killed myself a long time ago. And if you benefited from it, is that so wrong to enjoy that, since I care about you?” 

Sesshomaru slams his fist through the wall and gasps at the pain, forgetting that he still doesn’t have the yoki to block it. “YOU SHOULD NOT CARE ABOUT ME!” Blood runs down his wrist from the splintered wood. 

Avalon leaps up running to him cradling his hand that is bleeding. “What can I do? I care.” She lifts his hand looking for any splinters in it. 

He rips his hand out of hers backing away and leaning against the wall. He holds his wrist to his chest. ‘I cannot bear her pain. I cannot be worth torture...rape.’ 

“What did I do?” she asks, hurt by him pulling away from her. “I didn’t mean to offend you. Please, let me look at your hand?” she asks, holding her hand out for it. 

He shakes his head, refusing. ‘Nothing is worth rape.’ 

“I’m sorry,” she says softly and goes to grab a kimono from the ones he gave her. Slipping it on, she goes back to him. “Is this better?” She is so confused and hurt by the way he’s acting. 

His breaths come quickly as he attempts to regain control of himself. He can’t speak and he can’t care for his own hand. He shutters his eyes, unable to look at Avalon. Instead he walks over to a bowl of water on a stand and lowers his bleeding wrist into it. 

Avalon walks cautiously over to him. “Please let me help. It’s my fault you're not healing as quickly.” 

He rolls his wrist back and forth in the water. It turns pink, clearing his skin and revealing a thick, sharp, black chunk of wood stuck in his skin. 

Avalon offers her hand again to him. 

He nods, holding his wrist out to her. 

Avalon takes his hand examining it before bending her head over and bringing her teeth together around the end of the splinter and pulling it out. She drops the chunk into her palm and places it by the bowl of pink water. “Let me wrap this?” 

He nods again, feeling exhaustion creep in. 

Avalon grabs the tattered yukata and tears a strip from it and wraps the injury up and leads him back to the futon. “Are you okay?” she asks in a whisper, concern lacing her voice. 

He reaches over to the side of the futon and retrieves the scroll he had been reading before the fit took him and starts at the beginning, unable to remember how far he had before. Quiet, he needed quiet and more, he needed to know how to gain Bakusaiga. 

Avalon looks curiously at the scroll. “Do you mind if I read with you?” 

He doesn’t move or respond. Sesshomaru focuses on the words, flexing his fingers every so often, surprised that shattering the wall actually caused him pain. 

Avalon’s eye twitches as her ire raises. They were in the middle of a conversation and he flips out and then when she gets him to calm down, he ignores her. “Sesshomaru!” she says a little louder. 

He groans. “You really cannot stop chirping can you? Onaga?” He adds ‘magpie’ because she reminds him of one, the way they never stop chirping. 

“We were talking and then I don’t know what happened,” she says frustrated. 

“I am reading,” he says blandly, not wanting to finish the conversation. 

“You can’t just stop a conversation like that. If you want to read that’s fine but say something. Don’t just ignore me.” 

He shifts, moving more pillows to take his weight off the stump and continues reading, ignoring her outburst. 

“YOU!” she says, getting off the bed suddenly. “I...AHHHH!” she screams. “You’re rude,” she finally says pointing a finger at him. 

“You are childish!” He slams the scroll down. “I am tired and in pain, because you attacked this Sesshomaru after his limb was severed! You claim to be apologetic over my pain and yet you can’t stop talking!” 

“So the mature thing would be to say, I’m tired and in pain. I would like to rest in silence. Not just grab a scroll and ignore me when I talk to you. Sorry I’ll go find something to eat. Rest, recuperate without my chattering,” she says turning and walking towards the door. 

“This Sesshomaru is not beholden to you,” he says icily and returns to the scroll. “Selfish, self-absorbed, ungrateful…” 

“I heard that,” she says over her shoulder. “And I don’t forget your words.” She opens the door stepping out and closing it behind her. 

“Good riddance,” he mutters, slamming his whip against the door, tearing a whole through the shoji door. ‘Finally quiet.’ 


	24. To Teach a Chef

Avalon wanders the halls not knowing where she is going. She stops her movements and sits on the floor in the hall resting her back against the wall. Tears slip out and she quickly tries wiping them away. ‘I thought we were actually starting to open up to each other. Why can’t he respect me? All I do is try to help him and he treats me like garbage.’ “Ass,” she says out loud. 

Her hair stands on end. There is a powerful yokai and it isn’t Sesshomaru. Reiki rises automatically and the sword manifests in her hand. She stands on guard in an instant.

“Hmm, you are something,” a voice purrs from her right.

Avalon turns to face the voice and she lowers her stance. She bows, letting her sword disappear. “My apologies.” 

“No, no, it will serve you well to be quick on your feet. But tell me daughter, why do you cry?” Gobodo-sama stands in a relaxed pose wearing a purple and white kimono with butterflies, wrapped in a fur trimmed blue robe. Her eyes dance with excitement.

“Daughter?”

“Well yes, you are my son’s mate.” Sesshomaru’s mother smiles. “Not that I expected he would take a human for a mate but as far as human’s go, you’re not bad. You will give me strong grandchildren.”

“My Lady?”

“You may call me ‘mother’.” She wraps her arms around herself.

Avalon winces. “Mother.”

“Now tell me my dear daughter, why were you crying?”

“Your son is frustrating,” Avalon grunts out.

“Oh, is that all? Hmm, yes he is a difficult child.”

“Will my charge be safe here?” Avalon asks, concerned.

“Hmm, that human child? Yes. I’m not sure what you did, but the servants have been whispering non stop about how terrifying you are. They would not dare harm the girl. You know they will never respect you. You can only scare them into submission.”

“It is how I thought it might be.”

“Oh, you are aware of youkai/ningen relations? Then you know that you will be targeted by demonesses who are jealous of your bond with my son.”

“That will be inconvenient,” Avalon huffs.

“You’re not scared?” Sesshomaru’s mother’s eyebrow raises.

“I have dealt with worse.”

“Mmm, perhaps. You should go back to my son. He will be missing you.”

“Doubtful, I’ll eat then go back to him.”

“Are you so sure daughter?”

“Yeah pretty sure the string of insults are a good indicator.”

“Perhaps, go eat and return. I'm sure by then he will wish to see you.”

“Yes, mother.” Avalon says half heartedly.

“Good.” Gobodo-sama smiles “I’ll leave you to it.” She walks down the hall. Avalon mopes for a few more moments. “Oh, where is the kitchen?” she asks, then slumps realizing that she is alone. Just then a female with long blue hair and a tight kimono that wraps her body like a glove steps around the corner. She doesn’t look like a servant but maybe a handmaiden.

“Excuse me.” Avalon gets up. “Can you show me to the kitchen?”

The woman sneers at her. She smells of Sesshomaru. ‘Another one of his conquests. Why is she even wandering the halls.’ “Shouldn’t you be in his bed?” she snips out at Avalon.

“What?”

“You're his newest whore. What did you do to get up in the clouds? He doesn’t usually bring ningen up here.”

“I’m not his whore!” Avalon glares at her.

“Fine, whatever you need to tell yourself, I’ll show you to the kitchen.” ‘And then I will see if he needs more satisfaction. He is never satisfied.’ “This way.” The inu-youkai leads Avalon down the hall and points to a door. “Through here,” she says as she turns around going back the way she came. ‘Now here I come baby.’

Avalon walks into the kitchen cautiously feeling a powerful aura through the door not as strong as Sesshomaru’s or his mom’s, but powerful. She spots a young man that looks to be about fifteen or sixteen. He has black hair and is speaking with another older looking youkai who is way too large. His triple chin is slightly disturbing to her. “Hello?” she asks gently, from the door. 

The younger inu-youkai bows to the older fatter one and then inclines his head to Avalon. He doesn’t speak to either but he smiles at Avalon as he leaves, casting a warm glow with his golden eyes. 

The older one comes stalking around the counter, squishing through the end of the counter and the wall, making his fat bunch up. “You’re Sesshomaru-sama’s new mate.” He bows low, his fat rolls waving like an ocean. “I’m Hiromaru, that was my son. He doesn’t speak much, you’ll have to forgive his silence.” 

“Oh, it’s okay, can you please um…get up,” she says quietly surprised she is being bowed to by a youkai. 

“It’s only proper, what with you being who you are. I bet you’re hungry. I sent some nice intestines to that little girl of yours, fat and greasy. What would you like? I just got some boar demon, your mate likes that, but it’s not his favorite. I might have some gizzard, or a ripe bear liver, plucked it out of the carcass a few minutes ago? I know, how about some fresh pig blood?” 

“No, no, no, and no and again no. Ningen don’t like raw organs or blood. We like cooked muscle and vegetables and fruit,” Avalon says embarrassed. 

“You eat those funny smelling things that grow on trees? No one eats those, except my boy that was just in here. His heart is in the forest, big yoki, but not a big fighter. Maybe he’ll have to grow some of those things for that little one if she’s going to stay here...oh no...she’s probably starving now too. She didn’t send the intestines back, bless her. Maybe she fed them to that little dog that follows her around.” He squishes back into the kitchen and starts rummaging. “No that’s the pan of eye-balls...hearts...livers...you don’t like to eat this do you?” He pulls out a shika womb with a still forming deer inside of it. “This one is a delicacy.” 

Avalon shakes her head no rapidly. “You said you just pulled a liver from a bear? Where is the flesh of the bear?” 

“Oh around the corner. But I don’t keep a fire here. I can give it to you raw. Which part do you want? It’s most tender in the rear section.” 

“Um, just give me a knife and point me to it and since my ward will be staying here, you will need to cook her food. I’m sorry to inconvenience you,” Avalon says defeatedly. 

“It’s no inconvenience. Now that my boy is back here in the castle, you’ll see in no time, he’ll have gardens full of fresh fruits and vegetables for your little girl.” He pulls out a knife that is longer than Avalon’s wrist and twice as wide. He hands it to her and then says, “this way.” He waddles under his heavy weight to the back of the kitchen where several different bloodied carcasses are being cleaned. “I pulled the skin off already and the fur. My boy is going to turn it into a blanket for your girl. It gets cold up here some nights. Humans don’t last well in the cold.” 

“No they don’t. Your boy sounds very kind. I look forward to getting to know him better.” Avalon leans over and slices a thin slice of meat from the leg then she takes another slice just as thin. “Sticks?” 

“Sticks?” he asks her, confused. “Right for cooking.” He glances around his kitchen, not finding any, he thrusts his fist into one of the walls and rips out a beam, then breaks it into several pieces. “How is this?” 

“Extreme,” she says, shaking her head. She grabs one that looks like it will work and threads the meat on the piece of wood. “Let’s see. Is there no fire place around here?” 

“Not here, but Sesshomaru-sama has one in his room. Likes to read by the firelight when he can’t sleep at night. Been that way since he was a boy.” 

“I see. Well, can one be built? Because you’ll need one. And it would be more convenient being in the food preparation area,” 

“I’ll get it built tonight.” 

“What do you do for hot tea?” she asks, confused. 

“Find someone who breathes fire? What do you do?” 

“We light a fire and use it to heat the water. You don’t breath fire do you?” 

“No, but we have a few slaves that can.” 

“Slaves.” Avalon thinks, ‘they have slaves here?’ “I will be going now. Hiromaru it was a pleasure meeting you,” she says while bowing her head to him. 

“Take care of yourself Avalon-sama.” 

Avalon walks out of the kitchen in a daze towards her room. She would have to heat the meat up in Sesshomaru’s fireplace.

Yuri slips into the room, swaying her hips. “Sesshomaru-sama,” she says his name seductively. 

He growls in warning, facing away from her, still wearing nothing but his fundoshi and the makeshift bandage on his hand. “This Sesshomaru did not send for you,” he says without taking his eyes off the scroll. 

“You didn’t have to, my Lord. I knew you would want me. I’ve come to satisfy your hunger,” she says soothingly as she sashays closer to him. 

He releases a lower, darker growl, standing up, his muscles tightening. “Leave.” 

“Let me please you, my Lord,” she says, getting on her knees. “You know I will do anything for you.”

Avalon comes to the door and hears a female voice in his room. 

Sesshomaru walks past Yuri, leaving her on her knees and takes Avalon’s hand, leading her into his room. He removes the meat from her hand and tells Yuri, “Perhaps you have not met the mate of this Sesshomaru. Your services are no longer necessary.” 

“Her? She’s just a human.” Yuri gets up and glares at Avalon. 

“A most satisfying human,” Sesshomaru snaps back, easing Avalon against the wall, and lifting her up with her back balanced against the boards. He comes closer to her until he is between her legs. “Maybe you would like to see satisfaction, Yuri?” He pushes Avalon’s Kimono apart to reveal her core to him and starts moving his fundoshi aside. 

“You must be joking,” Yuri crosses her arms. 

“Sesshomaru?” Avalon questions under her breath. 

He leans his mouth next to her other ear and whispers, “shh,” entering her gently but gasping again at how hot and tight she fits him. “Leave,” he bites at Yuri, pushing into Avalon again, grunting in satisfaction. “Now.” 

“You will tire of her,” Yuri says as she walks out the door leaving it open.

Avalon wraps her arms around Sesshomaru enjoying the way he moves inside of her. 

He kisses her mouth tenderly and grateful that he did not frighten her by taking her so abruptly. “Satisfy this Sesshomaru,” he hums in her ear and speeds his thrusting, gripping her ass, making the wall shake as he takes her. 

Avalon groans with pleasure and hitchers her legs up and pulls him into her. She kisses his lips while panting. Her arms move up and down his back, grabbing his rear. 

He pushes into her until he can’t hold back any longer and together they come. He holds her tightly against the wall, slowly kissing her mouth. “Are you alright?” he asks her. “Did I hurt you?” 

“No, it didn’t hurt but what on earth was that all about?” 

He pants against her lips, letting her down and sliding himself back into his fundoshi. “She came without an invitation.” 

“And you have sex with me when people enter your room uninvited?” Avalon asks skeptically. 

“When it is to insult the mate of this Sesshomaru?” He shrugs, returning the water in the bowl that has been changed and wipes himself. “Would you have preferred I let her complete the task she wanted on her knees?” 

“No, I was going to say I hope more individuals come in uninvited if this is what happens to me when they do,” she says wrapping her arms around his waist. 

He nuzzles the underside of her chin. “And when I take another? Will you still feel the same?” 

Avalon’s chest hurts. “Another?” She says dropping her arms and grabbing the discarded meat. “I hope you don’t mind, I’m cooking this meat in the fireplace,” she says, not wanting to answer the question. She sits in front of the fireplace on the floor, placing the meat in it to cook, staring into the flames. 

Sesshomaru sits behind her, straddling her hips, pulling her into his chest. “I will leave an heir behind. I told you this and you agreed in return that I give you a hanyou child.” He kisses her neck. “Eat and rest with me. It’s late.” 

“You said take another. That doesn’t sound like just producing an heir,” she says glumly. 

“If I had wanted it now, Yuri would have sufficed to conceive for me. She is at the beginning of her heat and not aware of it. I chose you, Onaga.” He smirks into her neck. 

Avalon nods, still feeling hurt that she has to share him, even if it was only for a night. 

“Eat and come to bed. I do not sleep often. I will hold you tonight.” 

“Alright. One skewer is for me the other is for Hikari, you think one of the servants can take it to her?” 

“Jaken.” 

“Is Jaken always within your calling range?” she asks jokingly. 

“Mostly.” He reaches for the scroll and sets it next to him. “Had we bonded the natural way, we would spend time in seclusion together. For now,” he whispers in her ear. “I want you.” 

Avalon nods, pulling the meat out of the fire and checks the two skewers. She walks to the door sliding it open and Jaken was at the door about to knock “Hey Jaken-sama can you take this to Hikari?” 

Jaken comes running around the corner with a glum look on his face. He takes the meat and leaves, casting Avalon a nasty glare. 

Avalon closes the door and turns to Sesshomaru. ‘You have no idea how much that ‘for now’ hurts.’ “I don’t think Jaken likes me. He gave me a nasty look.” 

Sesshomaru shrugs his shoulders. “He will learn respect.” He moves to the futon laying down. He covers himself with a light sheet. 

Avalon nods and starts eating the skewer of bear meat she cooked. “So what’s in the scroll anyway?”

“In the morning, Onaga. This Sesshomaru needs rest.” 

“Sorry.” she quickly finishes the bear meat and crawls into the futon with him. She lays on her back wondering if he will want to hold her. 

Sesshomaru lies on his right side, not sure why she isn’t coming closer to him, so he closes his eyes, giving her the physical space he thinks she needs. 

She looks over and sees his eyes closed and moves closer to him so her back is pressed into his chest. 

“Mmh.” He curls his legs into her knees, wrapping an ankle over hers and sniffs her scalp next to her neck, it’s become his favorite place to smell. “I have never allowed a female to sleep in my arms before. In this way,” he withholds laughing, “this Sesshomaru is the virgin.” 

“Just do what feels natural and good,” she says softly. ‘I wish this was the first time a man had held me in my sleep.’ 

“Holding you, breathing your scent,” his voice quiets as he speaks slurring his words with exhaustion. “Natural...beautiful…” he fades off into sleep. 

Avalon smiles gently as she hears him drift off to sleep and she soon follows.


	25. Confessions and Connecting

Sesshomaru wakes from stabbing pain in his arm. He groans attempting to roll onto his other side only to be distracted by something warm against his chest. In their sleep they had shifted. Now Avalon lay stomach down on top of his chest, with her arms wrapped around his neck. He smiles because she can’t see it and leans over laying a gentle kiss to her cheek, then rises out of the bed in search of obis. 

‘She said I will adapt.’ He finds several in one of his trunks and sits back down on the futon attempting to tie them with one hand in his lap, while watching Avalon sleep. Every so often the pain throbs and he can already feel his body beginning to warm to compensate for the pain that will come. He tries to ignore it, still too proud to go to the Healer. 

After a few moments, Avalon feels the lack of warmth and starts moving about searching for the missing heat. She gets to the side of the futon and falls, rolling out onto the floor. Her eyes snap open when her body hits the floor. She leaps up on guard. Her heart beats rapidly, pumping blood to her limbs as adrenaline fuels her body, fear is the greatest feeling at that moment. Her sword forms in her hand. She spins in place stopping once she sees someone on the side of the futon sitting. “Sesshomaru?” she lowers her sword letting it fade. Her heart feels like a jackhammer in her chest. 

He looks up from his work, he’s managed to get the first part of the knot in, seeing her distress. “Come sit with me,” he speaks quietly. “What’s wrong?” 

Avalon crawls up on the bed and sits next to him. “It’s nothing. I was just startled.” 

“Did you think you were still with him?” He folds the blue obi over, holding both ends, trying to make an eye to slide one end through with his fingers. His body shivers momentarily, warning him of another fit coming. 

Avalon takes a deep breath. “Not exactly more like I just wasn't sure where I was. But perhaps he has a part in my heightened reaction. I’m sorry I overreacted. Are you okay?” she asks, concerned. 

He fumbles the loop, dropping the ends and picks them up again. ‘Simple things,’ he thinks quietly. “The memories will fade.” He’s completely focused on his task, again trying to push a loose end through the hole. This time he completes it and sighs proudly. “It may take a day, maybe two for us to leave.” He avoids her question, wondering if sitting so closely she can feel the rising heat in his body. 

Avalon looks at him straining her eyes in the dark. She reaches out and touches his shoulder. “You’re warm. You’re hurting aren’t you?” Avalon shakes her head, her heart hurts “We have a few more vials in the room, do you want one?” she asks, gently. 

He finally manages to find a hole and slides the material through. “Must you always ask?” 

“I don’t want to presume. I’ll get one but I can’t see well,” she says downtrodden. She gets up and stumbles in the darkness towards the area she had left the three vials. She reaches out with her hand feeling on the desk for the familiar shape of the glass till she finds one. She strains her eyes walking back to him. She opens it and hands it to Sesshomaru. “Here, I’m sorry.” 

He takes the vial and drinks it quickly, uninterested in debasing himself in front of her again. Sesshomaru wraps his arm around her shoulder, kissing her neck tenderly. “We agreed, you would tell me when it bothers you,” he pauses and then points to the base of his stump. “Here it burns, like someone is holding a torch to it.” He drags his finger up his shoulder and then across his chest. “Here to here,” he traces his chest down to his navel, “like I am being crushed. You ache. Share your pain with this Sesshomaru.” 

“I...I...I…” a few tears slip from her eyes as she quickly wipes them away. “Mine aren’t physical but they cause my heart to hurt. He tried to break me. He made me kill innocents, women, children, babies. He had me destroy villages and he would praise me for it and then take me to his bed and I couldn’t do anything to stop it. I find peace in your arms and in your aura. It helps keep the nightmares away.” Tears start pouring from her eyes. She tries to wipe them away but they come quicker than she can get rid of them. “I know I agreed to you...you...having an heir, but the thought of sharing you, for even a night makes my chest ache. I’m sorry,” she admits, ashamed. 

He sets the obi down, leaving it wrapped around his thigh and scoots closer to Avalon, holding her tightly. “I cannot change who I am overnight.” He rests his mouth against the top of her head. “Find comfort in my arm, Onaga.” 

Avalon nods wrapping her arms around him, clinging to him as she cries. She whispers “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Over and over again in between her sobs. 

“Shh, enough apologies. You ache,” he tells her softly, letting her find comfort against his skin. “You ache.” ‘If only I had a vial to ease your pain.’ 

After a while Avalon cries herself out. She looks up into his face straining to see his eyes. “Why do you care about me? About my pain?” she asks softly. 

He thinks to himself as he has no reason to. Events will not be as they should with her existence now. “Primal,” he says, still holding her tightly. “The bond compels it, before? I do not understand the human desire to violate another. I have seen human women jump from cliffs to avoid it, after it, to end their pain. It happens rarely among our kind because the one who rapes is given a death sentence. You are strong. You have let this Sesshomaru make love to you, despite your fear.” He smiles in the dark where she can’t see. “You give me warmth.” 

“I don’t feel strong. I feel weak and pathetic. I don’t like crying,” she says defeatedly. 

“When the pain comes, I am also weak and pathetic. It will pass.” 

“You are never weak or pathetic, even when you are in pain, you are still strong and could crush your enemies if they came for you,” Avalon says haughtily. 

“I will tell you a secret,” he whispers, nearly inaudible. “When it comes. I cannot move, I cannot think. I cannot remember what I say and do.” 

“You may not remember but you move and you lash out with your whip at things that annoy you,” she says mischievously. 

“And cut things that are tender.” He rubs her back. “Remove the cloth, let me see if it’s healed.” 

“It was nothing.” She starts pulling the kimono off to expose herself. She turns so he can see her back. “Must be nice to be able to see,” she says jokingly. 

“Humans have such weak eyes,” he says as a crooked finger glides up and down her back. “The skin is healed.” He lifts the kimono back up for her. “I chose this one to fit your form. The colors remind me of you.” 

“Well they are lovely but why did you get me ten? Do you intend to shred them so rapidly?” she says playfully. 

“Do you not like them?” he asks befuddled. ‘Strange female.’ 

“It’s not that I don’t like them, it just confuses me. I don’t feel like I deserve such extravagant gifts.” 

“You lacked clothing after the battle,” he tells her, still not understanding her shock. 

“True but one or two kimonos are really the only necessity. Two are better so you can wear one while you wash the other. I guess I’ve just come to think in simple terms. It’s not like I’m a princess or something,” Avalon says, then adds with genuine gratitude, “thank you for the kimonos.” 

“You will dress befitting your station. And they were made for ease of movement. You will not be hindered in battle.” 

“What is my station?” Avalon asks curiously. 

“The mate of Daiyoukai. You will not humiliate this Sesshomaru by dressing like a peasant.” 

Avalon rolls her eyes. “Okay…” she says slightly annoyed “But as your mate, what does that mean for me? I mean, I know about you know the bond and the desires but where does that leave me? Are we married, you're a Lord so what does that make me?” 

“A Lady,” he says as if she should know that. “You may thank this Sesshomaru for elevating a peasant ningen to such a status. Bonding is similar to marriage.” 

Avalon slips out of the futon and prostrates herself on the floor before him. ’I was never a peasant.’ “Thank you for elevating this peasant ningen to a Lady.” 

He tickles her neck. “You are not my pet. Get up.” 

Avalon gets up giggling. She leaps at him, wrapping her arms around his neck, making him fall against the futon. “No, but you wanted me to thank you. I figured I would do it properly.” 

He groans at the pain the impact causes on his stump but settles for tracings the contours of her face. 

“Sorry.” she says gently. “So why are you up so late anyway?” she asks curiously. 

He searches in the dark for the obis he had set next to him and shows them to her. “Adapting.” 

“So how's it going so far?” she asks quietly. 

He pushes her off him and sits up pointing at his hip. “I was just beginning when an Onaga fluttered her wings.” Sesshomaru sits by the head of the futon again. “Sit with me.” 

“Sure. I’d be happy to,” she says, coming to sit by him indian style.

He takes in Avalon, sitting close to him but not near enough. He takes her wrist and gives her a firm tug, pulling her next to him, so he can feel her warmth on his side. “You warm my heart. I do not understand the need for love, it’s blinding, it killed father.” He rests his head on hers, tenderly nuzzling her hair with his nose. 

“I’m unable to explain the need for love to you, but I am sorry that your father passed for his love. Not all love is so tragic.” 

“It is what you want from this Sesshomaru.” He inhales, moving the hair of her scalp while he does. “Forgive me for tying you to this fate.” 

“I do want love,” she says quietly. “But who's to say you won’t in time.” She shakes her head. “I can hope, can’t I?” 

“A fool’s hope. I do not love. It is a weakness. I cannot love a human.” 

“Then I guess I will be a fool,” she says softly. ‘Let me hope. It’s all I have.’ 

He groans, tired and frustrated he can’t convince her of the futility of gaining his affection. ‘I feel nothing.’ He exhales and hands her an orange obi. “Try to tie the obi with one hand.” 

“Ummm, okay.” Avalon puts one end in her mouth. She wraps it around tightly once, then loops it around her waist on the left side letting it go with her hand to wrap it around again to make the other loop, releasing it. She grabs it again and pulls it around once more. She ties it around the strip she is holding in her mouth before dropping it. She makes a loop holding it with her right elbow. She makes the other side into a loop. She twists her fingers as the base of the two loops making a loose bow. She leans over grabbing one loop with her teeth while pulling the other with her right hand. “And there,” she says proudly. 

“I said one hand, not hand and mouth.” He lets out a small laugh and then stops himself, pinching his teeth together. “What are you doing to this Sesshomaru? I do not laugh.” 

“Making you friendly?” She shrugs. “You can laugh around me. You don’t have to pretend to be anything. You don’t have to maintain a certain persona with me. I’m your mate. I won’t judge. I won’t think less of you for laughing or even smiling.” She smiles up at him. 

He indulges in Avalon’s mouth. He releases her shaking his head. “I am not used to feeling more than anger, rage. Perhaps one day I will smile for you.” He nuzzles the underside of her chin, wanting a distraction from the obligation of  _ love.  _ “Tell me more about the child, this Rin. How will I know it is her?” 

“Hmm, she is young. Eight summers old. She wears a pink tattered kimono. She will be missing a front tooth. She wears her hair in a side ponytail. And she will not speak to you or anyone.” 

“A creature of silence.” He will appreciate that after how frequently Avalon needs to engage in conversation, but in the quiet of the night, it doesn’t bother him. He unties the obi from his leg and sets it aside, settling on holding Avalon around the waist and setting his mouth against her neck. For now, there is no pain and he only feels tired. 

“We will leave when I can go more than a day without it,” he pauses, not wanting to admit how bad it has been, “without it blinding me with fever. Onaga,” he whispers in her ear. “Did you wake afraid because this Sesshomaru was not in bed with you?” 

“You were there when I went to sleep and then you weren’t. I was afraid when you weren’t there,” she admits. 

He tries to suppress the twitching of his lips into a smile. Any normal human would be terrified of him, yet this one had always found comfort in his presence. “Should I wake you next time? I do not often sleep. These nights I have spent with you, will not be when we leave.” 

“I understand,” she says looking away from him. “But yes I would like it if you would wake me if you and I sleep together and you need to leave me,” she says sadly. “Will you understand there are times that I will want you to hold me through the night? Not often but sometimes.” 

“For what end?” 

“Comfort. Keep my nightmares away,” she says quietly. 

“I hunt at night,” he says, straining to connect to what she needs. 

“You hunt every night? All night?” she asks softly. 

“To eat and to gain strength.” 

“I won’t ask often, just every once in a while.” 

He strokes her back, considering her request. “When you can’t sleep. I will comfort you.” 

Avalon sighs, shaking her head. ‘You can ’t even grant me that? To be by my side every once in a while? Is it really that difficult a request?’ “What about when I wake in the middle of the night and you are off hunting and I can’t sleep? There are times when I know I’m going to be more susceptible to the nightmares and it’s at those times I might be asking. ” 

He points at a long pointed ear. “Call for this Sesshomaru. I will come.” 

“You will come when I call?” she asks hopefully. 

“I will come,” he reassures her. Sesshomaru pulls her down into a lying position with him rather than sitting up and says quietly, “If I am to heal, I must rest.” His eyelids feel heavy once again and he finds his own solace in her arms. “Your scent gives this Sesshomaru comfort.” 

“Your warmth and your aura give me comfort. Sleep. Stop talking to me.” She kisses his cheek and closes her eyes to fall back asleep. 

He tickles her side. “Naughty Onaga.” He buries his nose in the back of her hair. “You will check on the child in the morning. Ensure that Hikari is satisfied with her room. She will be safe here. Did he know of this place?” 

“No and he never was able to get much out of me. I was careful with my wording. I never lied but I would never give him what he wanted. Giving him any advantage would harm you and I would not do that.” 

“I cannot kill the hanyou?” he asks, ruefully, while pulling Avalon’s body closer to his. He wanted to feel all of her against his skin. 

Avalon sighs. “He has a part to play. He cannot play that part if he is dead. I do not know if we could defeat Naraku without him. His companions play a part too, so no killing them either,” she says, snuggling closer to him. 

“It will not stop me from reminding him of his place.” He curls his arm around her waist, letting his nose fall into her neck, then he reaches up and pulls the kimono off her shoulder. “If this Sesshomaru must comfort you when I would rather hunt, you will remove this and let me feel your skin.” 

“You may strip me of my clothing whenever it suits your needs,” she says seductively. 

He tugs the rest of the cloth down. “I do not wish for intimacy. Your skin and scent help with the pain. Give me your skin.” 

“I would like to keep my skin thank you very much, but you can have as much access to it as you need. I said whenever it suits your needs and this is a need.” She tosses the kimono aside and brings herself close to him letting her skin contact as much of his body as possible. 

He sighs at her warmth and the way her body fits into his. He holds her so her front is pressed against his, and every contour of her breasts, stomach and hips is against his chest. “You trust this Sesshomaru,” he says with his eyes closed, knowing that she really did. 

“Of course I do, why wouldn’t I?” 

“Because you didn’t. Only a few days before you tried to leap from a cliff to avoid this.” His mouth connects with hers, licking her cavern sweetly and then he mutters, “for your trust.” 

“I feared being a prisoner again. I didn’t understand what it was, even now I’m still learning what this means. But I trust you, I really do.” 

“You are free, Onaga. Your body is yours. You may reject my advances and I will not take you without your consent. You are free.” He kisses her again, letting it linger longer this time. 

“I enjoy our encounters. Why would I reject them?” she says, smiling at him. 

“Shh,” he hushes her, silencing her with his mouth. “Sleep.” 

Avalon brings her lips to his and rocks her hips against his before resting her head down “Alright, good night Sesshomaru.” 

“My Onaga,” he kisses her forehead already mostly asleep and feeling some relief from the pain he feels he caused her by not searching for her. ‘I could not stop it then, let me heal you now.’ 

“Can I call you mine?” she asks softly 

He shakes his head back and forth, eyes closed and heavy with sleep. 

Avalon sighs sadly and a few tears slip past her eyes. ‘I’m not free. You don’t love me and you won’t even try. You claim me but I can’t claim you. I’m just a piece of property to you. I’ll never have love.’ She falls asleep with these sad thoughts. 

Avalon suddenly wakes. Her eyes shoot open, tears streaming down her face. Panic and disgust fill her. She feels the arm wrapped around her waist and feels even worse. ‘I slept with Naraku willingly.’ She struggles to get out of Sesshomaru’s grasp. Once she is free, she dashes to the corner of the room and curls into a ball holding her hands over her head. The emotions overwhelm her. 

“Avalon?” Sesshomaru unfurls his eyes slowly, feeling the struggle against his arm and the tang of fear overpowering the cantaloupe and honeydew smell. ‘Not again,’ he groans internally, feeling the deep, throbbing pain in his stump. He forces himself out of bed, slick with sweat, hair matted on the sides and cautiously approaches the scared woman in the corner. “Onaga, what’s wrong?”   
“Kill me please? I don’t deserve to live. You deserve so much better than me,” she sobs out, still covering her head, not even looking at him. The tears pour down her face. Her bare body curls in on itself making her as small as possible. 

He crouches down in front of her, setting his palm on the back of her head, breathing heavily from the growing burn in his shoulder. “I’m not going to kill you,” he whispers, stroking her scalp tenderly. “You are safe.” 

Avalon bats his hand away. “You don’t know,” she whispers, feeling her chest tightening at how heartbroken she feels. “I don’t deserve to be with you.” 

He lowers himself painfully down next to her, bracing his weight on his right hand, slipping down the last few inches. He rests his back against the wall and folds his legs in. “Tell me?” Breathing is getting difficult. ‘Not now…’ 

“I...I...I...I.” Her breath becomes more labored and her throat feels like it is closing up. “I slept with him.” She finally gets out breathlessly, her heart racing and pain permeating her chest. 

“He violated you,” Sesshomaru speaks in a low voice but the words are laced with venom. “It was not your choice.” He hugs the stump, gritting his teeth. This was not a good time for him to be hurting like this. He releases the stump and tries again to set his hand on her head. 

Avalon shakes her head. “Noooooo, noo, nnooooo,” she wails. “I slept with him. I deserve death! Please?” she begs him. The tears come unyieldingly. She whispers, “Kill me? Please?” 

His eyes widen in shock. “Willingly?” 

Avalon nods. “Kill me?” 

“No.” His body begins to shudder from pain. “Live.” 

“Why? I slept with him. I did it of my own accord. I...I...I wanted it. I don’t deserve to live. I am not fit to be your mate.” Her body shakes with emotion. She wraps herself so tightly she can barely breathe. 

“Urges are not to be ashamed of.” He gasps at the growing pain in his arm, the way it dips into his stomach and burns in the stump. He scoots closer to her, pressing his sweat-soaked side into hers and rubs her back in broad circles. “I want you. You are fit for this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon shakes her head. “How can you be okay with this?” she whispers. 

“Because you gave yourself to me. He took what was not his to take. Your purity is mine. You were a prisoner in his castle and did what you had to in order to survive. There is no shame in that.” 

Avalon looks up at him with tears in her eyes looking into his eyes. “You don’t hate me?” 

“I am f...f...fond of you,” speaking is becoming difficult as a jolt of pain shoots through his stomach into his chest, changing the rhythm of his heart. 

Avalon finally sees his sweat soaked brow and can see the pain in his eyes. “Your arm!” she says getting up and running to the desk grabbing a vail, opening it and handing it to him. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realize sooner,” she says ashamed. 

He tries to take it, but his fingers won’t stop shaking. It slips through them landing on the floor, spilling the contents as he finally falls sideways, unable to resist the pain any longer. He curls into himself, nearly convulsing from the shooting flames in his stump. “O...Ona...Onaga…” 

Avalon tries to catch the vial before it falls but misses and goes for the last vail on the desk. She pulls his head into her lap and starts to pour the liquid into his mouth slowly. “I don’t have another one, here,” she whispers. 

In the dark of his mind, he recognizes the liquid that stops these fits of fever. His head aches, his legs are cramping. He swallows painfully, half choking, while reaching around her waist to pull his nose against Avalon’s bare stomach. “F...f...forgive...me,” he speaks through clenched teeth. “M..my...fault. Your pain…” 

Avalon shakes her head. ‘Yes, you are part of the pain I feel but I can’t fault you for it. It’s who you are.’ A few tears spill down her face. “I don’t deserve to be yours. I don’t deserve to be safe. I’m a whore and I betrayed you. I told him when you would be weakest and that was when I attacked. That’s why you are like this. I’m sorry, you don’t need to ask for my forgiveness. I need yours.” 

“Not...a...whore.” He swallows, trying to speak as the vial slowly works its way into his system. “Innocent...p...pure.” His nose dips down and he kisses the top of her opening, lost in the fever. “V...like...a...v...virgin.” 

Avalon cries over him, wrapping her body around him. ‘How can you think that? I will do whatever I can to make this up to you. You healed me, took my pain and I betrayed you. I have so much to make up for.’ 

His teeth begin chattering as the cycle of the flare up continues. He feels less pain, but his body has already hit it’s boiling point. “D...d...don’t....leave....I need you.” 

“I won’t ever leave you,” she promises through her tears. 

He nods, curling his body around hers, raising his knees up to meet her thighs and his eyes begin to close in exhaustion, but he fights sleep, for fear that she will try to take her life. “Don’t jump...stay.” 

“I’m not going anywhere,” she says soothingly. 

His breathing finally calms as his temperature slowly lowers and breathes more freely. His eyes crack weakly. “You have value,” the words are slightly slurred. “So much value.” He shifts against her on the wooden floor. “So tired.” 

Avalon nods, but she doesn’t feel she has any value right now. “I’ll be here,” she says gently. 

He nods back, finding the floor very uncomfortable. “Help me into the futon.” He slips trying to sit up from the sweat running down his body. 

“Of course,” she responds while catching him before he falls. She wraps her arms around his waist, taking most of his weight on her hip while she walks him to the futon and helps lay him in the bed. She climbs in beside him pressing her body against his and allowing him as much access to her skin as possible. 

“Submissive Onaga. You are a good mate for this Sesshomaru.” His breaths become deeper. “I will protect you. Safe…” he trails off, falling asleep again. 

‘I don’t deserve it.’ she thinks as she falls asleep with him. 

A few hours later an elderly inu-youkai slides open the door followed by a younger inu-youkai. The elderly youkai walks over to the bed looking at the sleeping couple. Her eye twitches. “What have you done?” she asks quietly. 

Sesshomaru’s eyes bolt open, he grabs a blanket to cover Avalon, not caring about his own nudity. “Ksa-baba, get out!” he bellows at her. “And you,” his eyes train onto the younger youkai, with long black hair. “You do not belong here.” 

“Hmm, you have not come to see me and Gobodo-sama has told me I must check on you,” she says patiently not moving from her spot beside the bed.

Avalon wakes with the sudden movement. She looks around and spots the two individuals in Sesshomaru’s room. She swallows a scream but instead she wraps the blanket around herself, looking stunned. 

Sesshomaru gets up and flies at Chie, wrapping his fingers around her neck, slamming her back first into the wall. “GET. OUT!” 

Chie wraps her hand around the one holding her throat and twists forcing him to release her. “So disrespectful,” she chides. 

“Exertion will cause pain,” the youthful one finally speaks as his head cocks to the side examining the stump. “This was forced to close?” he asks Chie.

Sesshomaru attempts to get out of Chie’s grasp by throwing her off his arm, surprised by her strength. “I did not send for you.” He widens his eyes in threat at the younger boy, “and this is not where you are meant to be.” 

“I answer to Gobodo-sama over you Sesshomaru-sama and it was her command I come see you. So stop being stubborn and allow me to see your arm.” She cocks her eyebrow at him. “Or I could deny you these.” She pulls several vials out from her pouch with her free hand. 

“I do not need those,” Sesshomaru replies icily. 

“Your lies could never fool me,” Chie says airily.

Avalon looks over at Sesshomaru. “Maybe you should let her look,” she suggests gently. 

Sesshomaru glares over his shoulder at Avalon, but releases Chie. “He will leave,” he says of the younger youkai. “There is no reason for him to be  _ here. _ ” 

Chie sighs. “Yamamaru is learning from me, but if it truly makes you uncomfortable. You may leave Yamamaru-san.” 

Yamamaru bows to Sesshomaru, Chie and then to Avalon, then leaves the room. 

“Do what you must, Baba.” Sesshomaru turns so she can see the stump. 

“Come now, have a seat,” she says as she walks over to the futon, patting the end. 

Sesshomaru picks a yukata out of one of the unopened packages. It’s a soft lavender made from fine, thin silk and he hands it to Avalon. “Turn around Baba.” 

Chie laughs but turns around. “It’s not like I am unfamiliar with the female form,” she says.

Avalon slips the yukata on and tries the strings. “So what are you looking for?”

“I just need to make sure it is healing and I have a few questions. Some things are not making sense to me. May I turn around?” 

“Avalon?” Sesshomaru raises an eyebrow at her to confirm whether or not she feels comfortable. 

“Uh…” Avalon gets up and grabs clean hakama and holds it open for Sesshomaru shrugging her shoulders. 

He tosses them aside. “Chie is the Healer. You may turn Baba.” 

Chie turns around and walks over to him. “You know your nickname for me? I find it endearing,” she smirks, grabbing the stump to examine it. 

Sesshomaru snarls in pain, pulling the stump out of her hands, gritting his teeth. ‘Baba should know the base is not to be touched.’ 

“This makes no sense to me. Did you force yourself to heal?” she asks, crossing her arms. 

“What difference does it make?” He rubs the base of the stump, furious with Chie. 

“Using yoki to force a wound to close will stop the bleeding and will give you a momentary reprieve to fight but the pain will linger. So I ask again, did you force it closed?” 

“If you cannot provide something to speed my healing your presence is unnecessary. Leave, Baba.” 

“Pff, you're so sweet. Perhaps I can, perhaps I can’t but I will need all the facts first,” she challenges. 

“You are not needed. Leave.” 

“Sesshomaru-sama please tell her,” Avalon pleads at his side. 

“I do not need her.” 

“You think that, but you are still so young. Tell me what happened and this Chie will help.” 

“What I do on land, is none of your business or  _ hers, _ ” he bites out, knowing this was all at the hand of his meddling mother. 

“I would not speak to your mother of this. She knows that, she is only concerned about you. She knows of your pain,” Chie replies. 

He shifts his gaze away from Chie and waves his hand at her dismissively. 

“He forced himself to heal,” Avalon blurts out.

“Hmmm, who is this woman to you Sesshomaru-sama?” Chie asks, she had assumed it was just a bed mate. 

“If you cannot tell, perhaps your age has finally caught up to you,” he snorts at Chie. 

“My age,” Chie walks over to Avalon to look more closely at her.

Avalon shrinks into the futon away from the piercing golden gaze of the elderly youkai. 

“You mated a ningen?” Chie asks curiously with shock in her voice. 

“No,” Sesshomaru boasts, “you are aging. This Sesshomaru mated the Murasaki no Raiko Miko. Why would I waste my strength on a weak ningen?” 

“A ningen and a miko? We are youkai!” Chie says to him, whirling to face him. “Have you lost your mind?” 

“To allow you to remain in my room when you are unwanted, perhaps I have.” 

“So did you mate her before or after you lost your arm?” Chie asks, shaking her head. ‘What has befallen the mighty Sesshomaru-sama?’ 

“That is private,” he shoots back, refusing to divulge details of their battle or how he saved her. 

“After,” Avalon says while hiding her head under the covers. ‘She might be able to help. Stop being so stubborn.’ 

Sesshomaru reaches out to Avalon’s toe and pinches it. ‘Quiet. Stubborn Onaga.’ 

“So how soon after losing your arm did you bond her?” Chie asks, waiting for the non-answer from Sesshomaru and the answer from the shy mate hiding under his covers. 

Sesshomaru ignores Chie. 

“Within hours,” Avalon speaks wincing. 

“You lost a limb, bonded and forced it closed, anything else I should know?” Chie gasps, shocked he was even still alive. 

“You are incapable of submission!” he growls at Avalon. “I did it to save your life and spare you the pain of healing what I tore in half, because you could not stop yourself from giving away my location!” He’s finally had enough and leaves the room, slamming the shoji door behind him. 

“Well that explains it. I’m surprised he is still alive. He truly is strong. His strength reminds me of his father’s.”

“I should go to him,” Avalon says sadly.

“Here take these. He should be better in a few days.” Chie hands Avalon a satchel full of vails. “Tell him for me? Will you dear?”

“Of course. Why is he in so much pain now?” Avalon asks.

Chie smiles sadly. “He used his yoki to save your life and take your pain. There is none left to block his pain now, but I could feel the yoki rising when he was angry with us. I can tell in a few days he should be back to himself.”

Avalon nods her head. “Thank you for telling me.” She grabs a plain white yukata from a chest for him and seeks out his aura.

Chie follows Avalon out of the room and heads to her chambers.

Avalon lets her reiki fan out, locating his aura, following it to a garden. There are large trees that tower over her and small white pebbles make a path way. She steps onto the pebbles since they are so smooth they don’t bother her bare feet. She walks until she spots Sesshomaru sitting down in the grass leaning against a tree.

“Hi,” she calls gently to him offering the yukata to him. 

He holds his arm out for her to sit with him. 

Avalon joins him sitting in his lap. “I’m sorry, I just want you to be healed and I thought she might be able to help if she knew.” 

He stares at the sun, making his golden eyes seem almost yellow instead. “Why did you tell him where to find this Sesshomaru? Did he threaten you? Hikari?” 

Avalon shakes her head. “I had a fever. I didn’t even remember telling him or wanting to...with him. I was very sick at the time,” she says sadly. 

“I do not like speaking about what is private.” 

“I get that, but she is a healer and she told me that you should be back to normal in a few days. She said when your anger rises, she could tell by your yoki. You didn’t have to take my pain. I could have dealt with it.” Avalon turns to look at him. “Thank you,” she says as she kisses under his chin. 

“I could not allow you to endure more pain. I smelled his seed in you, I knew what he had done to you. It was enough. I am youkai, my body is stronger than yours.” 

“But you're in pain now because of me and I feel awful about that.” 

“You are in pain now,” he reminds her softly. He kisses her cheek. “It aches more than the pain in my arm.” 

“Why didn’t you just let me die and then bring me back?” she asks, she knew he could, he did it with Hikari. 

“It only works once.” He clenches his teeth and then redirects his discomfort by softly nipping at her shoulder, swirling his tongue against her skin. “It was a painful death. You begged this Sesshomaru to take your pain.” 

Avalon looks over at him moving her lips to meet his. She twists her body so she can kiss him better before breaking it to breathe out, “Thank you.” 

He nods and pulls her closer to his body, until she is straddling his hips. His fingers curl into the hair by the base of her skull. “I could not let you die.” His lips press harder into hers, his tongue dips in her mouth. “Live...do not ask me to take your life.” 

“I’ll live,” she says, kissing him and running her hand over his chest and then bringing her hand down to run along his hips and thighs. 

His hand slides up her yukata, parting it to find her breast as his mouth falls onto her neck, licking and sucking on the supple flesh. He wants her. To bask in Avalon’s body and warmth. His chest is burning with a passion he doesn’t understand, but he wants to possess her, to comfort her pain, to give her life. 

Avalon starts rocking her hips against him, wanting to connect again, to feel him inside her. Not only was her body yearning for him, her heart was too. She reaches down to move his fundoshi aside. 

“Not yet,” he gasps out against her mouth, then starts licking lower.

Avalon pants breathily.

He pushes his index and middle finger inside her core, letting his thumb slide up and down her clit, feeling how tight and hot she was already. 

Avalon moans with pleasure rocking her hips into his hand. She leans forwards kissing his lips, running her tongue along his bottom lip begging for entrance. 

He opens his mouth for her, thrusting harder with his hand, wanting her to finish, to find release. He twirls her clit more quickly, sweetening the sensation for Avalon, then whispers, “Touch me.” 

Avalon reaches down to grasp his rock hard cock in her hand. She runs her hand up and down his shaft. When she feels the precum, she runs her thumb through it and uses it to help lubricate his member, stroking him up and down. Her grip tightens with each pass over her clit without even realizing it. She bites down on his bottom lip gently and lets it slide through her teeth. 

He groans in pleasure, wanting more. So he kisses harshly down her chest, scraping his teeth against her skin, forcing her back to arch backwards over his knees, while he nips and kisses her chest. He removes his hand from her core, to support her back and hips, replacing it quickly with his shaft, unable to hold back any longer. “Onaga,” he pants out, going upright again while keeping her back over his knees. 

Avalon’s eyes widen. She shifts upright to look into his eyes wrapping her arms around his neck. “Sesshomaru,” she groans out half in passion and half feeling uneasy with him taking her like he had. 

His mouth finds her neck again and he puts pressure on her trunk, supporting her back. “Go back,” he whispers, licking her earlobe. 

Avalon looks at him unsure, not wanting to explain again how she felt. 

He ceases his thrusting, reaching up to grab her shoulder from behind and he arches her back again, leaning over her, to give her time to adjust. “Where is your trust?” 

“I...I trust you,” she says softly. 

He begins thrusting again, gasping and panting at how hot and wet she is. “Stay down.” He bites down lightly on her shoulder and then licks her nipple on the way up. “Trust this Sesshomaru.” He shudders in pleasure. 

Avalon swallows thickly but stays laying back as he asked her to. She tries to focus on the pleasure she was feeling but the longer she couldn’t see him the more she started to feel fear rising. 

He leans forward again to touch his chest against hers, picking up the pace. “So good,” he tells her and kisses her lips, lovingly. “Listen to my voice, Onaga.” He sits up again, knowing that she felt fear, but lost in the euphoria of their bodies sliding against each other. 

Avalon tries breathing deeply, finding some comfort in his voice but the way she was feeling, she wasn’t sure if she could continue to do this. “Sesshomaru?” she questions weakly. 

He lifts her up, running his moist fingers into her hair, keeping her engaged. “You’re scared,” he says, seductively in her ear. 

Avalon nods sadly as she wraps her arms around him. 

“Let go of the fear,” he whispers, kissing her neck, down to her collarbone. “Let go.” 

“I’m trying,” she whispers against his shoulder. 

“It will feel good. Focus on my voice, my scent, my skin. Trust this Sesshomaru, lean back.” He struggles to contain himself within her, only rocking gently to maintain both their arousals. 

Avalon nods while letting herself lean backwards again. She holds the side of his thighs to feel his skin in her hands. 

He leans over with her, leisurely kissing her mouth, thrusting his hips into her thighs. “So brave,” he mutters, “so strong.” He flexes harder inside of her. He swirls his tongue around her nipple several times before sitting up again. “Touch yourself if you want,” he says tenderly, and begins thrusting more quickly, angling to hit higher against the roof of her vagina, feeling it flex with his motions. 

Avalon shakes her head ‘no' while she grips his thighs tighter, trying to focus on how Sesshomaru was doing this to her. It wasn’t anyone else and she was willing to be part of it. Her finger nails dig into his thighs, drawing blood. She realizes when there is wetness on her fingers. She releases her hold. “I’m sorry,” she cries out. 

He ceases thrusting, lifting her up again and holding her close to him. “Does it hurt?” 

“No, I hurt you, I made you bleed,” she says, crying into his chest. 

He fights his body, feeling tense from arousal. “You will finish. Does it feel good?” 

Avalon nods. “But I hurt you.” 

“I want you to finish. Do you want me to go back to my hand? Touch you here?” He dips his index finger between her lips, just over his cock and puts pressure on her clit. 

“You’re not upset I injured you?” she asks, confused. 

“Onaga...I am at the edge. I need you to finish.” He starts circling her bud again. 

Avalon brushes her lips against his and her fingers weave into his hair. She rocks her hips on his cock, enjoying the feeling of him inside her and being able to hold him to her. 

He circles faster, tugging at the tip of her bud until he feels her bearing down on him. “Finish,” he urges her. “Show this Sesshomaru your strength, your bravery.” He speeds his thrusting to satisfy her, until he feels her tighten and then pulsing against him. He groans, fighting the urge to pound into her. “Lean back.” He holds her shaking body. “Submit to this Sesshomaru. You are a worthy mate, show me your trust.” 

Avalon nips at his bottom lip before leaning back again, more relaxed now that she had come. Her hands move back to his thighs to grasp them again but her fingers no longer dig in. 

He breathes in and out heavily, preparing himself. He thrusts so painfully slow, extending his pleasure, curious if he can make her come again. He dips deep inside her folds, exploring every inch of her, wanting to know where it felt the most pleasurable. He thrusts deep watching her reaction. “Does it feel good?” 

“Yes,” she says breathily, taking deep calming breaths. running her hands along his thighs. 

He thrusts high. “And that? Such a sweet Onaga.” He adjusts his grip on her back, tormenting himself. 

“It’s good,” Avalon replies, liking the way he is asking each time he hits her differently. 

“Good?” His mouth falls open as he starts shallow thrusting. “I would have been bored with the rest by now. Oh,” he groans, taking his time with her. “You give this Sesshomaru the release he desires.” 

Avalon tilts her head up slightly annoyed with him mentioning others while they were in the middle of intimacy. “Please don’t mention others when we are being intimate?” she asks, trying to not sound angry. 

He gazes down on her fiercely, changing from shallow to deep thrusts. “You think you are unworthy,” he groans again, falling on top of her still moving inside of her. “I give to you, I did not to them. I allow you the comfort of my arms,” he grunts again, so close to his own ecstacy. “You are so worthy. Have pride in this. Ask this Sesshomaru to please you, to make you finish again. Deep?” He thrusts deeply, making her legs spread wider, “or high?” He moans at the contact against her walls. 

“Make me finish again, please? Deep and fast is best,” she says gently, while her lips brush against his. 

He grits his teeth nodding, holding her in place while erecting his body again. He thrusts deeply and quickly inside of her panting and straining not to finish before she does. 

Avalon moans in pleasure as he hits her deep and quickly stimulating her clit as he slams his pelvis into her. She opens her legs wide to allow him easy access and her breath becomes faster and faster as she comes closer and closer to another orgasm until her body stiffens and her walls clamp down on his shaft. She screams her release, “SESSHOMARU!” 

He slams himself into her one last time, slumping over her body as she milks him. “Do you understand now?” He lifts her limp body up to curl against his chest. “You mean something to this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon nods her head lazily as her body is exhausted and so relaxed she feels like jelly in his arms. 

“Live,” he whispers next to her ear, supporting her body, struggling to understand the warmth he feels in his chest, his need to please her as never had the others. They were solely meant to pleasure him, whether or not they enjoyed it was their own affair. “Live, Onaga.” 

“I will live,” she says, half falling asleep in his arm. 

“YOU’RE HAVING SEX WITH HIM!!!!!” Hikari screams from the hall, then her feet pad away quickly, with Jaken Jr at her heels. “AND I SAW IT!” 


	26. Feverish Secrets

“Kuso!” Avalon says, too exhausted to move from her spot. “She is going to hate me,” she buries her head in his chest. 

“You may speak to her,” Sesshomaru says haughtily, releasing her. “Why does it matter if we are intimate?” 

“You do not understand humans sometimes,” she says, dragging herself up off the ground. 

He only shrugs in response, tucking himself back into his fundoshi and putting on the yukata she brought him. He holds her hand and kisses her cheek, letting his lips linger for a moment. “For your trust.” 

“I’ll find you later okay?” she says gently. 

He nods and slaps her ass playfully. “Go.” 

Avalon rushes to follow her. “Hikari wait!” she yells when she reaches the castle and barges through the door. She quickly glances left, then right and spots her retreating form. 

“You’re leaving me for him!!” Hikari screams at her while Jaken Jr, runs sloppily along the smooth wooden floors. 

Avalon shakes her head and follows her. “That’s not how it is,” her voice is calm but she is frustrated. 

“You left me yesterday and didn’t come back!” Hikari folds her arms over her new Kimono. It’s light pink with white butterflies and a purple obi. “And what were you doing in his lap! Who does it like that!?” 

“You are right but he has been having issues. And well…” Avalons cheeks flush. “Adults,” she says meekly. 

Hikari’s eyebrows knit together and she glares at Avalon. “I’m almost fifteen. If I hadn’t been raped Kami-sama only knows how many times I would be doing it too and nobody does it like that!” 

“Alright, well he asked me to trust him so I did. Look I’m sorry HIkari, we are mated and he needs me and I’m not just talking about like that.” She runs her hand through her sweat soaked hair. “His arm was severed and it hurts him and me being near helps calm him. You remember when I brought him to the village and we slept outside the hut?” 

“You mean when he couldn’t move and he almost hit me?” Hikari absentmindedly strokes Jaken Jr’s ears. 

“Yes exactly that, well it keeps happening and only my scent and being in physical contact with him seems to calm him and it’s all my fault he is like this.” Avalon’s shoulders slump. 

“You didn’t cut his arm off, why is it your fault? You should have, he’s a jerk,” she says rolling her eyes. 

“I was on the brink of death and he bonded me to save my life and to take my pain from that injury. He could have let me die but he didn’t. He saved me.” 

Hikari’s eyes bulge. “If he wasn’t such a jerk that would be romantic.” She stops and slides down the walls, feeling helpless. Jaken Jr curls against her side. “What am I going to do here? How long do I have to stay?” She wipes her nose. “There’s no humans here. I’m not going to have any friends.” She pulls her knees up to her chin. 

Avalon walks over to her, sitting next to her and wraps one arm around her leaning her head on Hikari’s back. “I know I’m sorry. It’s just not safe anywhere else.” Avalon sighs. “I could kidnap someone and bring them here,” she says jokingly. 

Hikari blushes. “Maybe a boy?” 

“You want a boy? How old is this boy?” Avalon says slyly. ‘Is my little Hikari growing up?’ 

“I don’t know.” She scratches the sleeve of her new kimono. “Who would want me anyway? He doesn’t care that you weren’t a virgin?” Then she chuckles and adds, “well if you were doing it like that, he must not.” 

Avalon giggles. “No, he didn’t care that I was violated. He felt I was a virgin. He felt that way when I first met him. Did I ever tell you how we met?” 

“No.” Hikari puts her chin on her upraised knees. 

“It’s a little hard for me to talk about, but I think it might help you understand. I was being chased by five samuri. They captured me. They held me down, tied me to a tree, and forced my legs apart.” Avalon takes a deep breath trying to steady herself. “The leader penetrated me and when I screamed, he silenced me, by kissing me. I bit his tongue off. He bled to death before my eyes. But his men were not pleased and decided to kill me. So they had their katana’s out and were ready to cut me down. That’s when he came and cut them all down. He freed me. He hunted for me, so I could have food and he procured clothing for me. He was a prick but he was kind in ways too. He wanted me sexually but he never forced himself on me.” Avalon laughs a single laugh. “One night we got drunk and he offered to take my virginity. I was really confused. He explained, in his eyes I was still innocent.” 

“He doesn’t think you’re dirty,” Hikari says softly. “Maybe I should find a demon.” She grins sheepishly. “It doesn’t hurt onesan? You were screaming really loud.” 

“Oh...um...well the first time it was slightly painful. He was larger than any before but my screaming was...actually...umm...because...uh...it....uh...feels good.” Avalon hides her face in her hands embarrassed to admit something like that aloud. 

“Ka-chan never sounded like. Well, she would wait for us to leave the hut but I was curious once. She wasn’t on top either. You don’t have to be on your back?” She closes her eyes wincing as her mind races back to the day in her village. “No,” she whimpers, starting to shake. “No…” 

Jaken Jr. gets up and starts licking her hands and her face. 

“Hikari, it’s okay. You're safe.” Avalon says softly rubbing her shoulder. “Look at me. It’s okay. You don’t have to go back there.” 

She shakes her head, burying her face against her knee and covering her head with her hands. The puppy nuzzles her head through Hikari’s hands and licks her tears. 

“Hikari,” Avalon says gently while wrapping her arms around her young ward. “It’s okay.” she whispers against her ear. “It’s okay.” 

Jaken Jr. starts whining and then howling softly almost as if the puppy is singing. It makes Hikari laugh, bringing her out of her memory. “She does this when I go there,” she pats the puppy’s head. 

“Well aren’t you a good puppy?” Avalon says gently while stroking the puppies white fur. 

Jaken Jr. nudges Hikari’s face out of her legs and rests her white head against the frightened girl. “I couldn’t on my back. They used rope. I struggled so hard it cut my skin. Now I see it whenever I see my wrists.” 

“I’m sorry Hikari. We could get you wrist wraps, they might help. And there is no reason you would have to be on your back. There are many different positions for intimacy,” Avalon says gently, holding Hikari’s wrists lightly. 

“Doesn’t matter anyway,” Hikari says wistfully, staring at the ceiling. “No one will have me.” 

“Hikari you are beautiful. I am sure someone will want you.” 

She shrugs her shoulders, not feeling very beautiful.

“Oi, there you are!” Hiromaru comes plodding around the corner. “Been looking all over for you. I have a treat for your dog in the kitchen. Think she’d want it?” 

“Um...I guess so.” Hikari unwraps her arms from Jaken Jr. “I bet she’s hungry.” 

“I’ll bring her right back,” Hiromaru says, giving Avalon an awkward bow. “Avalon-sama, pleasant to see you as always. Come on then y--Jaken Jr. Who names a dog after that toad?” he asks. 

“Sesshomaru-sama,” Avalon volunteers. 

“He would think of that. Well, I best be on my way then. Come on you y--Jaken Jr,” Hiromaru pats his leg. “That’s a good boy.”

“She’s a girl!” Hikari calls back.

“Right! Good girl.” Hiromaru hobbles back down the halls. 

“At least he isn’t as scary as Sesshomaru-sama’s mother. She came to visit me yesterday. I thought she was going to eat me.” 

“I can totally understand that. She scares me too and I have to call her mother.” Avalon sticks her tongue out like she ate something really gross. 

“Mother?” Hikari giggles. “Well you really did pick your mother in law didn’t you?” 

“I did not.” Avalon crosses her arms and sticks her nose up. 

“Can’t you break the bond? If you could?” 

“I don’t know how and I don’t think I can or I’m sure Sesshomaru-sama would have already. He didn’t want to bond me,” Avalon says sadly. 

“Why are you sad Onesan? Do you want to break it?” 

“I don’t know what I want.” Avalon sighs. “He just tells me he could never love, so if it can’t be broken and he’s right about not being able to love...I’ll never know the love of a man.” 

“It’s like an arranged marriage. Love doesn’t matter, just making babies. But when you lose your virginity at eleven you have time to think about it. I wouldn’t let someone touch me who didn’t love me.” 

“He doesn’t even want to have children with me,” Avalon whispers nearly inaudible. 

Hikari’s mouth drops. “We have to find a way to get you out of this bond. Why did you scream so much?” 

“Because he brings me a lot of pleasure when we are intimate,” Avalon says quietly. 

“Aw, I don’t understand.” Hikari kicks her feet out. “But why would he do that if he didn’t feel something for you? He doesn’t make any sense. Sex doesn’t make any sense.” 

“He says I bring him warmth in here.” Avalon points to her heart. “And the bond drives us to mate,” Avalon explains unemotionally. 

“Yeah but then you can just lay on your back and let him do his thing until his seed comes out. Why would he care how you feel?” 

Avalon shrugs. “He says I mean something to him and I alone satisfy him.” 

“That’s a start at least. I’m hungry. Hiromaru-sama is nice but he sent intestines last night. I gave them to Jaken. Jr.” 

“I know, did you get the cooked bear?” Avalon asks, concerned. 

“Cooked bear?” Hikari replies, equally confused. “No one brought that.” 

“I am going to have to step on a little toad then. I had cooked you a stick full of it last night. Jaken was supposed to bring it to you.” 

“I never saw him last night.” Her stomach makes a sad sound. “I’m afraid to ask Hiromaru for something to eat. He takes up the entire hallway!” 

“Don’t worry, let's go together and we can have something made for both of us. The fireplace should be in place by now. He didn’t have one before. I had to cook it in the fireplace in Sesshomaru-sama’s room.” Avalon gets up offering her hand to Hikari. 

Hikari takes her hand and walks with her down the hall. “The demon won’t find me here?” 

“No, he has no idea where this is. You will be safe here,” Avalon says reassuringly. 

“I don’t really have a home anyway. But there isn’t anyone here for me. No other humans.” 

“I know, I’m sorry. I will come back whenever I can,” 

“Okay,” Hikari says as they turn down the halls and make it to the kitchen. 

There are loud thuds and slams in the back of the kitchen that are making the walls shake. A little boy with silver hair runs into the kitchen taking out a bowl of raw meat and then runs back out with a smirk on his face. 

Avalon looks over at Hikari. “You know him?” She points where the little boy just ran. 

“I haven’t seen him before. I only know the servants and Gobodo-sama went through three before she found one that Jaken Jr wouldn’t bite.” 

“I’m sure Jaken Jr was just making sure you were safe.” Avalon smiles. “Come on, let's go see the chaos.” She grins devilishly. 

Hikari and Avalon walk through the opening between the counters and the walls to the back of the kitchen and find the same young black haired demon hammering boards down into a firepit with his hands. He uses one spike and drives it in with his palm and then another, while Hiromaru hefts the giant beams and cuts them down to size. The pit is large enough to roast a medium sized bear and part of it already has metal bars to hang pots from. “Avalon-sama,” Hiromaru wipes the sweat off his face and chins. “Didn’t expect you so soon.” 

“Hiromaru-san, Yamamaru-san, my ward is hungry and the meat I roasted her last night never got to her. Are there any fruits or vegetables that she can have?” Avalon looks over at the younger youkai remembering Hiromaru had said he would be the one to ask. 

Yamamaru picks up a basket that is filled with peaches, pears, apples and green leafy vegetables. He hands them to Hikari, his eyes lingering on the girl for sometime.. 

Avalon notices that Yamamaru is looking at Hikari for a bit too long and clears her throat loudly. “Ah-hem.” 

Yamamaru averts his eyes quickly and goes back to the firepit. 

“Brought those up last night. As for cooked meat, we’re almost there. Also brought up...what did you call it?” Hiromaru asks his son. “Those white grainy things?”

“Rice,” Yamamaru answers in a quiet voice.

“Arigato,” Hikari blushes. 

“Arigato Yamamaru-san and arigato for getting the fireplace put in so quickly Hiromaru-san.” Avalon bows her head to them both. 

Hikari bows to them as well, following Avalon’s lead. “There are so many fruits in here.” She picks up a peach and takes a bite. “It’s so good! Try one!” She passes one to Avalon. 

“Well this morning I have Shika, Hare and Serrow. Serrow is tender, very good,” Hiromaru tells Avalon and Hikari. “The firepit isn’t quite finished yet. We’re almost done.” 

“I’m sure we will enjoy some cooked meat later but, uh, we saw a young silver haired youkai run with a bowl of meat. That wouldn’t have been it would it?” Avalon asks curiously. 

“That little weasel!” Hiromaru hobbles into the front of the kitchen looking through the cabinets. “That was the serrow! Yamamaru go find your brother and give him a lesson!”

The boy ceases his work on the firepit and bows to both Avalon and Hikari, again his gaze rests on the girl longer than it does on Avalon and then he exits the room. 

“Where is Jaken Jr.?” Hikari asks, searching for her puppy.

“Sent her back to find you. She probably got lost,” Hiromaru tells Hikari. 

“You have another son?” Avalon asks, while she takes a bit of the peach Hikari gave her. 

“Little one is Doumaru. He’s about to reach his eighty-second summer. Still full of guile and mischief, just like his mother.” 

“Any other children?” Avalon raises her brow at him wondering how big the family was. 

“If you don’t mind Avalon-sama,” his eyes glaze with tears, “I’d rather not talk about them. Lost them in a battle two hundred years ago.” He gets a rag to wipe his eyes. 

“My sincerest apologies Hiromaru-san, I only meant to know if more youth would be showing up at the castle.” Avalon looks down ashamed. 

“There’s a few.” He dabs his eyes. “Sorry, can’t talk about them without it breaking my heart. They were....well you don’t need to hear about it. Anyway, can I do anything else for you?” 

“No and I’m very sorry for you and your family’s loss. If I can help in any way please let me know,” Avalon offers gently. 

“Can’t change the past. That’s what Inu no Taisho said. Won’t ever forget them though. Not for as long as I live,” he says resolutely. 

“I’m so sorry for bringing it up. I’ll be leaving now.” Avalon bows her head and turns around walking towards the door. 

Hikari runs after Avalon, quickly bowing as well. When they get out the door she grabs Avalon’s hand. “Why did you have to ask that. He was so sad!” 

“I did not know he had lost his children. I feel horrible,” Avalon says, walking away from the kitchen. “Why don’t you show me your room,” she says, downtrodden. 

“Okay,” Hikari replies, leading her to it. “Sesshomaru-sama said I could pick out my blankets and he even let me choose this kimono! He told the servants I could have more if I wanted and a futon to sleep on instead of a tabi mat. Jaken Jr. loves it! Where is she?” She leads Avalon back to her room and opens the shoji doors. “It’s simple but it’s as big as the hut I used to have.” 

Avalon looks around the room. “He can be kind at times,” she says, still depressed. ‘Why didn’t Toga bring his kids back from the dead?’ 

Suddenly Jaken Jr. comes running through the door and leaps onto the bed, wagging her tail. “There you are,” Hikari runs to the puppy and hugs her. “She’s the only reason I can handle staying here.” 

“Well I’m glad she is here with you then.” Avalon says rubbing the puppy’s head. 

A knock comes on the door outside. “Avalon...sama,” Jaken calls sourly. “Avalon-sama!” he calls more desperately. 

Avalon walks to the door sliding it open. “Yes Jaken-sama?” she says the  _ sama _ with a sneer. 

He rubs several cuts on his face. “You have to come right now before someone sees him. He was reading in the sunroom and he collapsed. I tried to help,” he cups his cheek. “Someone will see him. You don’t understand youkai politics, even here someone might take this chance to kill him.” 

“Take me to him, I’m sorry you got hurt. I’ll see you later Hikari.” Avalon sets out the door 

“Bye Onesan!” 

“Quickly, this way.” Jaken grabs her hand and starts running. “His skin is red and he’s hugging the stump.” He leads her down several long hallways to a large room that is made almost completely of windows. At the end Sesshomaru lays on the floor in a ball hugging his arm. “Should I get his mother? She could move---” 

“No, go to our room, there is a satchel full of vials. Bring it to me. I can move him if necessary.” 

“Hai,” Jaken nods and then points at the door. “Lock it. He will be mortified if someone sees him like this.” 

“Go, I’ll only open it for you.” Avalon follows him to the door locking it behind him. She quickly makes her way over to Sesshomaru and wraps her arms around his stump putting more pressure on it and bringing her neck to be in his face. “I’m sorry. Jaken will bring the vials shortly,” she says softly, leaning over him. 

His breaths come out in short gasps, but his mouth reaches up for her neck anyway, licking her skin. He lets go of the stump now that she has it and searches for her waist and her lap as if he was blind. “Closer.” 

Avalon moves her body to be more inline with his now that he has released the stump. She places his head on her lap opening her kimono to expose her skin for him and she pushes her weight to put pressure on his stump. “I’m sorry, I’m here now,” she soothes softly. 

He sniffs his way into her stomach and holds her back tightly with his claws. “Engolish,” he bites out, shaking. “Say...Engolish...d...distraction.” His teeth chatter as his temperature rises. 

“I am here for you.” Avalon says in English. “I think I might have fallen for you,” she says in English. “I must be a complete idiot.” she says all in a soothing loving tone. 

He kisses her skin just beneath her navel. His head aches from the fever, his shoulder feels like it’s pinned to the ground. It’s too hard to speak. Someone knocks at the door. 

“Who is it?” Avalon calls calmly. 

“Jaken,” the toad calls. “I have them! But em...she followed me. The Healer…” 

“No…” Sesshomaru shakes his head, making his nose rub across Avalon’s belly, leaving sweat marks behind. “No…” 

“Please leave Chie.”

“But I must see him,” Chie says through the door.

“He will not accept you. Go!” Avalon says more forcefully.

Chie clicks her tongue. “He will have to see me later then.” Chie walks away leaving Jaken behind. 

Jaken nearly faints from relief. “Can you unlock the door now?”

“N...not...him...p...please.” He curls around Avalon, his claws digging into her back again. 

“I can take the medicine and have him go,” she offers gently. 

He nods, poking her stomach with his face, completely lost in the euphoria of the fever, but his grip on her back doesn’t lessen. 

“You have to release me,” Avalon says quietly. 

His arm falls shakily to the ground, immediately gripping the floor boards and scratching holes in them. 

Avalon gets up and unlocks the door. “Give me the satchel,” she says, blocking Jaken’s path. 

He hands it to her. “Help him? Please?” 

“I will and you, I have a bone to pick with you later,” she says as she closes the door, locking him out and rushing back to Sesshomaru. She picks his head back up and opens a vial and pours a small portion in his mouth, knowing he might gag if there is too much. 

He swallows what she gives him and when he feels more he swallows again. Relief comes slowly and again his body feels exhausted. He curls into Avalon’s body, nuzzling his nose in between the fabric of her clothing until he finds her skin again. “M...more...Engo...lish...On...aga.” 

“Why do you have to be so difficult? You keep breaking my heart with your stubbornness,” she says softly in English. “You are so confusing to me.” she says in English “Should stop saying things that you might ask what they mean. You make me happy and sad,” she continues speaking in Japanese, “I can sing in English.” 

“S...sing...t...take...the...pain.” He groans, tightening his grip on her back, tearing the fabric again. 

_ “♪ I'm so tired of being here _

_ Suppressed by all my childish fears _

_ And if you have to leave _

_ I wish that you would just leave _

_ 'Cause your presence still lingers here _

_ And it won't leave me alone _

_ These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real _

_ There's just too much that time cannot erase _

_ When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears _

_ When you'd scream, I'd fight away all of your fears _

_ And I held your hand through all of these years _

_ But you still have all of me _

_ You used to captivate me by your resonating light _

_ Now, I'm bound by the life you left behind _

_ Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams _

_ Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me _

_ These wounds won't seem to heal, this pain is just too real _

_ There's just too much that time cannot erase ♫” _

He smiles completely unaware that this time she can see it. “So...beautiful,” he whispers, relaxing his hand on her back. “My...mate is beautiful.” He struggles to remain awake. 

“Do you want to go back to your room?” she offers softly, smiling while tears fall down her face. ‘He’s smiling at me? He really thinks I’m beautiful?” 

His mind is still foggy and lost in the fever while the pain is subsiding from the vial. “Can’t stand yet. Stay...it’s so warm...like when I loved her.” 

Avalon brows scrunch together confused. ‘Who did he love?’ Pain laces her heart. ‘He says he doesn’t love but what happened to her? And warm like when he loved her.’ Avalon’s mind spirals trying to figure out what could possibly happen. ‘If it is like that warmth, does he love me?’ Avalon shakes her head not wanting to hope that, not when he has made it so clear that he does not love. 

His breath becomes more even but the fever still grips him. “Love hurts...only brings pain....do not make...this Sesshomaru love you,” he stammers out against her stomach. 

‘Don’t make you love me?’ Avalon becomes pensive and confused. ‘What do you mean, do not make this Sesshomaru love you? Do you mean that you are already falling in love with me and are fighting it?’ Avalon feels hurt. ‘Why do you think love only brings pain? What happened to you?’ Avalon holds him to her, wondering about all he has said in his fevered state. She knew it made for loose lips. She asks quietly in a whisper, “Are you falling in love with me?” 

“D...do not ask for...love,” he murmurs, feeling his eyes close against his will. He would be safe in his room but here, instinct forced him to stay awake. 

Avalon runs her hand lovingly through his hair. She notices the scroll on the ground that he has been reading. She reaches for it, grabbing it to read it. She only can recognize about 20% of the words. She recognizes Tetsusaiga and Totosai and Toga but not much more. ‘What in the world?’ Avalon sets the scroll down. “Do you want to go back to your room to rest?” she asks gently. 

He nods, sweetly kissing her belly as the fever subsides slightly. “Help me up,” he says unabashed, it was already too late, she had seen him like this too many times. He starts pushing himself off the ground weakly. 

Avalon grabs the scroll stuffing it in the satchel and slinging it over her head. She reaches under his right arm wrapping her arms around his chest helping to lift him up. She helps to place his hand over her shoulder making it look more like they are just walking together and starts walking for the door to unlock it. She walks slowly with him as they make their way to his room. She opens the door sliding it closed behind them and helping to lay him in his bed. She covers him and then crawls into bed with him. She faces him and runs her hand through his sweat soaked hair. 

“This is embarrassing,” he whispers with closed eyes. “I am Daiyoukai,” he breathes fitfully, “not a common dog.” 

“I never thought you were. I know what you are. Please don’t be embarrassed around me. I am your mate. I don’t judge you,” Avalon says lovingly. 

He nods. “Sleep.” He nuzzles his face between her breasts, moving her yukata aside. “Sleep.” 

Avalon smiles wrapping her arms around his shoulders, holding him to her chest while closing her eyes, letting herself nap for the time being. 

Several hours later Sesshomaru wakes, satisfied that Avalon had stayed with him while he slept. He tousles her gently to wake her up. “Avalon. I am getting up,” he tells her while sitting up. 

Avalon blinks her eyes then smiles gently when she sees him look at her. “Hey,” she says softly, sitting up as well. 

He leaves the futon peeling off the sticky yukata in the process and tosses it in the corner to be cleaned. Sesshomaru sniffs his shoulder and shakes his head. “This Sesshomaru stinks.” He goes to the bowl of water and uses a nearby cloth to rinse his skin. His hair is matted to his back and damp from sweat. 

“I think we need a bath,” Avalon suggests while getting out of the bed, walking up and hugging him from behind leaning her body against his back. 

“Humans bathe so often?” 

“Indeed, we need to or we smell bad,” Avalon says, nuzzling her nose into his right shoulder blade. 

Sesshomaru sighs at the comfort. “Soon. I wish to read. I have not eaten since the boar in the field.” He touches his stomach. “After I have eaten. Bring this Sesshomaru food,” he means it as a command but it comes out gingerly. 

“I will return soon,” she says, softly kissing his back, then releasing him. She sways her hips as she walks to the door and turns around to smile at him before opening the door and stepping out. 

He watches her hips, licking his lips. He is pleasantly surprised she is openly trying to seduce him. Before, he had initiated intimacy. ‘She must enjoy it.’ He returns to sponging himself off. 

Avalon walks down the hall to the kitchen. “Hiromaru-san?” she calls into the room. 

“Be with you in a minute!” he calls from deep in the kitchen. “You mangy little, mongrel!” There’s sounds of something growling and struggling. Hiromaru walks around the corner holding a live serrow, fighting his hold. He snaps its neck as he reaches Avalon and the grey body falls limp. “That’s better. What can I do for you?” 

“Sesshomaru-sama is requesting food and I am hungry as well,” she says, looking slightly saddened by the death of the serrow. 

“Well you can give him this,” he gives her the still warm body of the animal he just dispatched. “I’ve got more bear in the back, some shika, a boar and even some monkey.” 

“Ah...no monkey ever please, but if you could have some shika muscle cooked for me and sent to Sesshomaru-sama’s room, I would appreciate it.” 

“We just finished that firepit. I’ll get some made up right away for you.” 

“Arigato, how are you doing Hiromaru-san?” Avalon asks hesitantly. 

“Oh I’m fine...eh...are you okay?” Hiromaru peers into her face. 

“I’m alright.” She lets a small smile grace her lips. “I’ll go bring this to Sesshomaru-sama before it cools.” 

“He’ll appreciate it. Likes things fresh,” Hiromaru smiles at her while returning to his work. “Take care of yourself Avalon-sama!” 

“You as well Hiromaru-san.” She says, then turns slinging the beast over her shoulder walking back to Sesshomaru’s room. She slides the door open and closed behind her. “I brought you something,” she says lightly. 

Sesshomaru turns the scroll. He’s dressed in a simple black kimono with matching hakama, lounging on the futon with his back to the door. 

Avalon walks with the animal on her shoulder to him. She grabs his shoulder, shaking it gently to get his attention. “It’s freshly killed,” she says, slightly annoyed he didn’t acknowledge her and the thing was getting pretty heavy. 

He bats her hand off his shoulder and turns on her. “I am not your pet.” He yanks the Serrow out of her hand and sets it in a nearing bowl, cutting its neck and then sucking the blood out. 

“What are you talking about? You asked for food, so I brought it.” 

“Do not shake my shoulder,” he answers coldly as he finishes sucking the blood of the serrow demon out and starts cutting out chunks of meat to eat. 

“I’m sorry,” Avalon says quietly. “I didn’t mean to insult you.” 

He goes back to the scroll, still leaning on his side while reading through it, eating the meat. ‘Impossible to teach.’ 

Avalon looks at the scroll in his hand. “You keep reading that scroll over and over again. “What are you trying to find?” she asks hesitantly as she joins him in bed. 

His eyes slide over to her, equal parts annoyed and endeared about her curiosity, but reading is slower when he eats at the same time. “You said I will manifest my own sword. This was written by Totosai, the day after Father manifested Tetsusaiga from his fang.” He points to the section he is reading. “Can you read?” 

“I can but unfortunately this dialect I’m unfamiliar with. I can recognize some of the words but most I don’t understand. Like this,” she points to one symbol “It looks similar to ‘going’ but there is an extra dash here,” she traces the line. “So I don’t know if it means ‘going’ or not.” 

“This tells of the day when father fought a great battle and he was outnumbered. That symbol means fear. He feared for my life and the life of my mother.” He cuts the leg off the demon, pulling the skin off and begins eating it, wondering why Avalon is not disgusted by his eating habits. 

“I see, that is interesting since fear looks like this.” Avalon traces out the symbol with her finger on the futon. “It’s very different. I’d love to learn this dialect.” 

“Another time.” He goes back to reading the scroll and breaks off the other leg of the serrow. ‘I should not have gone so long without eating.’ 

“It’s odd. From what I know about it, your father gave his fang to Totosai and Totosai forged it into a sword. I wonder if the scroll is more of an indulgence of the truth than actual fact,” Avalon speculates. 

“Maybe what was written in your time was the tale and this is the truth,” he challenges back. 

“Maybe. But I know that your stupid half-brother will break it in a fight and Totosai will reforge it, using one of Inuyasha’s fangs--”

“The hanyou breaks my father’s sword?” Sesshomaru’s anger rises. ‘Does he have no respect for our father?’ 

Avalon sighs. “It’s an incarnation created by Naraku, able to break the sword with his teeth. He also can ready minds. A truly dangerous foe.” 

“Leave it to the hanyou to be unable to clear his mind.” He returns to the scroll, picking up where he left off. ‘How did you do it Father?’ 

“He does kill him after the sword breaks,” Avalon says quietly. 

Sesshomaru sounds her out, focusing on the scroll instead. His eyes narrow in finally on the area he had been searching for. ‘I do not experience desperation. How could father allow himself to become desperate?’ 

Avalon starts running her hand along his outer thigh. “Talk to me, what did you just read? You seemed disturbed by it,” she says gently, noticing his change in disposition. 

“You are an Onaga,” he says, going back to the same area. ‘He did it to save the life of mother and this Sesshomaru and...’ 

Avalon smiles at him waiting for him to talk to her, when a knock comes at the door. Avalon gets up to answer the door and a male servant presents a tray to her with a plate of cooked meat on it. Avalon takes the tray and the servant bows to her.

“Arigato,” Avalon says bowing her head.

“Please enjoy your meal Avalon-sama.”

Avalon smiles as the servant. “I will.” She closes the door and goes back to the bed and starts eating the cooked shika. ‘Bland but it’s good to eat. I’ll have to teach the cook to cook.’ Avalon giggles as she puts another piece in her mouth. 

Sesshomaru finishes his meal, leaving nothing but the skin and the bones in the bowl and sets it aside while his stomach starts growling again. ‘I should have remembered to eat.’ Now that he has finished he reaches an arm out to Avalon, pulling her waist closer to his chest. ‘So that’s how you did it? What foe would this Sesshomaru fight to feel this desperation?’ 

Avalon smiles. “Satisfied?” she asks seductively. 

“I am still hungry.” He looks dismayed at the bones left behind. 

“I can go get you something else,” she offers. 

“Why do you care for this Sesshomaru?” He glances up from the scroll. 

“You’re my mate for one, but also you have saved my life and you have cared for me,” Avalon says looking over her shoulder to see him. 

“You were not a consenting mate,” he reminds her, turning on his back and massaging her scalp with his claws to draw her closer. 

Avalon leans down forgetting the plate of meat and lays down with him. “No, but I like being with you. Your aura has always brought me comfort and things could be so much worse for me. Why would I fight something that I don’t object to?” 

“It is good to be satisfied with one’s mate,” he whispers. “The scroll speaks of Father’s desperation, to protect my mother, to protect me. When two powerful daiyoukai come together and create a child, often opposite forces rise up to end their life, for fear of the power they will hold. The day Tetsusaiga was forged, mother was birthing this Sesshomaru. Father was fighting Ryukotsusei’s father. A hundred smaller dragons had broken through his forces and were upon his house. In a moment of desperation to protect this Sesshomaru and mother, the sword was forged. He could not defeat them on his own, not even in his true form, drawing on all that he was. To save our lives as he was being crushed, it formed from his fang.” 

Avalon eyebrows knit together. “But I thought the Tetsusaiga was forged to protect Inuyasha’s mother?” 

“No,” he says, combing her hair with his claws, then bringing some of the strands up to his nose, lazily enjoying her scent. “This happened 900 years ago.” 

“Well I guess it makes sense, Desperation and wanting to protect, it’s how you forge your sword. Why would it be different for your father?” 

He touches his stump. “Mine will come from this, if I understand what I have read.” 

“Yes, it will manifest from what is left of your arm and your arm will grow back. Desperation, compassion, and a desire to protect.” Avalon nods on his chest ticking out what is needed. 

“Why would you allow this Sesshomaru to lose his arm? You knew and said nothing and you question why I left you behind.” 

“I had wanted to warn you when we were in the tomb before you fought Inuyasha,” Avalon says sadly. “If I would have said it sooner I don’t think you would have believed me.” 

“I did not believe anything you said until the day the pink light went across the sky. You wanted this Sesshomaru to lose his arm. Half of what you just said was not true.” He brings her hair up to his nose again. “Even these strands know it.” 

“I didn’t exactly want you to lose your arm Sesshomaru, but it was something you needed to experience, to learn from. It makes you stronger in the end,” Avalon says nervously, even if it was the truth, she didn’t think he would like the answer. “I had hoped to be there to retrieve your arm after the battle and return it to you. It was why I asked about how long a finger was viable after being detached.” 

He growls low at Avalon, his eyes flashing red and then back to their normal color, but his yoki grows choking the room as he grips the back of her kimono, furious, annoyed but a part of him is relieved to know it was what was meant to happen. 

Avalon breath quickens and her heartbeat leaps up. She fights to keep reiki from reacting to the yoki flooding the room. “I’m sorry,” she whispers. 

“Are you?” he snarls out, his chest contracting more tightly. 

“I’m sorry you lost your arm. I truly am even if I think it was meant to be I still feel bad about it. I’m sorry you have suffered in so much pain because of what you did to save me. So yes I am sorry,” she says sincerely. “I don’t like that you are suffering. It hurts my heart seeing it, and knowing it’s my fault. I will do whatever I can to help you and even if it wasn’t my fault, I would still do what I could to help you.” 

His yoki lowers. “Remember this Sesshomaru is not your pet to control.” 

Avalon shakes her head. “I never thought of you as a pet. I may have gone about things in the wrong way but I never thought less of you. You are a powerful and strong daiyoukai.” 

“You will do well to remember who it is that you have bonded.” 

“I could never forget,” Avalon says relaxing against his chest. 

Sesshomaru slides Avalon off his chest and reaches for the satchel. ‘At least the Baba left more of these.’ He flicks the lid off with his thumb and drinks the bitter liquid. 

Avalon feels pain twinge in her chest. ‘He stressed himself so much he pushed himself to be in pain again.’ “Did you want to take a bath with me?” she asks hopefully. 

“You wish to bathe with this Sesshomaru again?” 

Avalon shrugs. “I like bathing and you being there makes for a more enjoyable experience,” she hints to him. 

“Again already?” His chest vibrates lightly. “When you were so scared before?” 

“I couldn’t see your face. I couldn’t look in your eyes, I wasn’t scared of the intimacy. It was...it was...I kept fearing it was him. It’s stupid, I know but when I can’t see you I...” she says slumping her shoulders shaking her head. 

“It will fade,” he says, tenderly. “At times I need more.” 

“I’m not against experimenting. It's just right now, I really need to be able to see you.” 

He nods, cocking his head to the side. Truthfully he was satisfied and wanted to rest. “Do you require release now?” 

“No, I suppose not,” she says. “If you're not in the mood, that’s okay. We don’t have to do anything,” she says, feeling somewhat childish. 

“Rest now.” He traces the black circles around her eyes. “You’re tired.” 

“Alright. Will you stay with me? If not, it’s okay but if you want to, I’d like it. But if not, it’s okay,” she stumbles over her words. 

“I will stay,” he replies somberly. “In the evening we will bathe, after dinner.” 

“Okay.” Avalon snuggles under the covers leaning on her side so he could spoon her if he wanted to. “Please hold me?” she asks delicately. “If not, you don’t have to. It’s up to you. I’m not trying to control you. It would just feel nice.” 

He turns on his side, sliding his arm beneath her shoulders and pulls her against his chest. “You are safe, Onaga.” He kisses her cheek and presses his forehead into hers. “When you dream, remember I am here.” 

“Thank you.” she grins leaning her head, so she can brush her lips against his. 

“The weak among my kind can enter dreams. If you become scared, do you want me to enter your dream?” 

“You could do that? Well I...um...I don’t know. You can’t judge me on my dreams. I don’t control them.” 

“I will slay your fears.” He nuzzles under her chin. 

“I would like that. But if you see something you don’t like in my dream you can’t be mad--”

He presses his lips into hers, cutting her off. “Quiet. Go to sleep.” 

She kisses him back “Alright.” Avalon’s head drops to be more comfortable and closes her eyes, “Um Sesshomaru?” 

Sesshomaru exhales, blowing the tendrils of her hair aside. “What?” 

“Yamamaru...he...uh...is he interested in Hikari?” 

“Interested?” Sesshomaru echoes her thought.

“Well me and Hikari were in the kitchen earlier and Yamamaru handed us a basket of fruit, but his eyes were fixed on Hikari for way too long.”

“The boy is harmless,” Sesshomaru reassures her.

“Alright.” she says yawning. 

“Sleep.” He kisses her scalp. 

Avalon nods molding her body to his.

Sesshomaru’s head rests next to hers, listening to her breathing. It’s even and peaceful, minus the gentle snores. ‘Noisy Onaga. What is this Sesshomaru going to do with you?’ His chest blooms with a warmth he is unused to feeling. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The song Avalon sang to Sesshomaru is Evanescence - My Immortal.


	27. Trepidation

They wake later together and enjoy a quiet dinner. Sesshomaru answers when Avalon asks questions but remains more pensive throughout the dinner. As the day passes and he thinks about the outburst that happened the night before, he feels an obligation to break their connection. ‘This is not fair to her.’ He cannot love, will not allow himself to love and what’s more, he cannot fathom a life where he does not leave behind a child that is like him, to raise a pureblooded son in his place as his father did. 

He sets Avalon down in his bed, getting an extra blanket to cover her with and lights the fire nearby before he leaves to keep her warm. He touches her shoulder, feeling tender and fearful. ‘Forgive me.’ He kisses her cheek and leaves in search of his mother.

At this hour she is always found in her private room. He knocks on the door, knowing that he might face a beheading if he enters without announcing himself. “Mother.” 

Gobodo-sama leisurely lays in her bed. Her head swivels towards the door, ready to kill any who would dare disturb her, when she hears her son’s voice. A wicked grin passes over her face, before she schools it to be as stoic as his. “Come my son,” she calls airlily. 

He opens the door and enters approaching her bed and then kneels in front of her. Sesshomaru pulls down the left side of his kimono, baring the stump to his mother. 

Gobodo-sama eyes widen and her mouth pops open for a second before she schools her features. “My son.” She gets off the bed and gently grasps his bicep looking at the arm. “I am sorry, I can’t fix this for you,” she says softly letting the limb go. 

He covers his stump again and forces himself to speak of what he came for. “I did not come here for healing.” He grits his teeth and lowers his gaze. “You have not asked why I would bond that which I hate.” 

“I didn’t think you would tell me my son. Why did you bond a ningen and a miko at that? Even though she is strong and quite beautiful,” she says gently to her son. 

“She is powerful,” he agrees with her, rubbing his chest. ‘What is this?’ He can’t wrap his head around his feelings. “It was an accident,” he avoids her gaze as he tells her of the battle after his arm was severed by Inuyasha. How he had sliced her side open, how she cried in pain for him to help her, her knowledge of the future and the many times she had been violated and finally how she had tried to kill herself when he told Avalon about the bond. “It was you who told this Sesshomaru to leave a pureblooded heir behind,” he reminds his mother. “This was not done in love, not even in friendship. I bonded her without her consent. Can it be broken without death?” 

Gobodo-sama nods her head thinking of all he has said. “You care for eachother or the bond would not have formed,” she says, softly, reminding him of that fact. 

He shakes his head refusing the emotion. “I am fond of her,” he admits tentatively. “But this is not right, to do this to her. I am no better than the ones that have taken her without her consent. I did it to save her life, not to tie her to life without love.” 

She smiles forlornly at her son. “And you can’t love her?” 

“I cannot love a human. She is not what I need.” 

Gobodo places her hand on either side of her son’s face to pull his head up to look into her eyes. “I am sorry my son, but once the bond is formed there is no way to break it, other than death. Yours or hers.” 

He removes Tenseiga from his obi and hands it to his mother, bowing his head. “Then kill me and free her.” 

Gobodo takes the sword in her hands hesitantly. “I’m not sure that would even work. The reason death breaks the bond is because it is permanent. If you come back to life, I fear the bond would be still intact. Even if it worked, you would break her soul. She would never be the same,” she warns sedately 

“Is there one who would know?” He sets Tenseiga in his mother’s lap, relinquishing his father’s heirloom to her. “I cannot do this to her. She would not have come to my bed save for the bond that compels us together. How is that not the same as violating her?” 

“I am sorry my son, it is close, I suppose but it’s not the same. She may be drawn to you but she can fight the urge just as you can. It’s difficult and will be maddening but the fact you came together so soon means she was not against the idea,” she says softly to him as she rubs his cheek. 

“Is there one who would know if the bond would be revived?” 

“Perhaps Chie. The only time I can think where this has happened is with your father and Izayoi. Chie tended her after... I will call for her,” she says, walking away to the door. She slides it open, spotting a female inuyoukai. “You, fetch Chie immediately,” she commands.

The female inuyoukai looks startled and bows her head. “Hai, Gobodo-sama.” She turns and rushes to the healers chambers.

Gobodo-sama returns to her son with a dole smile on her face. “You do not need to give me a pureblooded grandchild,” she says to him. 

“I only agreed to give her a hanyou in return for a pureblood heir. I will not give my empire to a hanyou,” he spits it out like it’s filth. 

Gobodo shakes her head somberly but says nothing. Moments later Chie stands at her door.

“My Lady.” Chie bows.

“Come and close the door behind you,” Gobodo-sama commands.

“Hai.” Chie turns and closes the door on the female inu-youkai who has returned with her.

“Chie, my son wishes to ask you a question and I am hoping you may know the answer.” 

“Of course my Lady.” Chie turns to address Sesshomaru. “My Lord?” 

“If I die,” he speaks slowly, “will Tenseiga bring the bond back.” 

“You mean with your mate?” Chie asks, looking at Sesshomaru with her old, but piercing gaze. 

He nods. 

“Hmmm, the only time that has happened is with your father and Izayoi. From what we had talked about, she said when she was brought back she still felt connected to him and when he died, she knew because her soul felt like it was torn in half. If that is anything to go by and her words are to be trusted, then yes the bond would return,” Chie says thoughtfully. 

Sesshomaru knuckles his forehead. “It’s not unprecedented to have a mate and another.” ‘She deserves better than this. She has had enough pain.’ 

Gobodo looks at her son. “No it is not.” 

“I would still provide for her, clothing, food, shelter. She would not want for anything.” He grits his teeth, hugging the stump. ‘This is not right.’ 

“Except love,” Gobodo-sama says, softly and morose. 

“Except love,” he echoes coldly, going to the door. “Goodnight mother.” 

“Son, consider trying for her,” she says with little hope. 

“There’s nothing to try, mother.” He exits the door and walks down the hallways to his room, finding Avalon still asleep. He kneels down next to her, while reaching for a vial to end the growing pain in his shoulder and then rests his forehead against Avalon's as she sleeps. ‘What have I done to you?’ He closes his eyes and calls on his yoki to enter her dream. ‘Can you forgive this Sesshomaru?’ 

Avalon straddles Kagewaki over a low table where food and dishes have been scattered on the ground. Kagewaki’s legs dangle onto the floor with his hakama around his ankles. Avalon rides him, moaning in pleasure as he bucks into her. Her hands rub up and down his chest before she dips low and captures his mouth in a passionate kiss. Kagewaki grabs her ass roughly, drawing blood as he digs into her flesh.

“Ava,” he moans out low and guttural. “Moan my name,” he commands.

“Kagewaki,” she responds deep and seductively.

“Yes,” he smiles, pulling his bloody fingers from her flesh to run his hands through her hair and along her cheek, leaving a trail of blood on her face. 

Sesshomaru’s body materializes behind Kagewaki. His mouth clenches. In the dream he has both his arms. “Fight him,” he tells Avalon from a dark wall. “Fight back.” 

Avalon’s dead eyes flick over to the wall, before Kagewaki pulls her face back to him, consuming her mouth. “You are mine,” he says against her lips, thrusting up into her. 

Sesshomaru strides forward, turning Avalon’s eyes to his, cupping her face in both his hands. “You are no one’s. Fight back.” 

Kagewaki keeps bucking into her as she rolls her hips in rhythm with him “Scream my name Ava,” he commands her.

Avalon moans and screams, “KAGEWAKI!”

“Good girl,” he praises her.

Avalon’s eyes are blank and unemotional and seem to not even see Sesshomaru. 

“Come back to me, Onaga,” he says affectionately. “This is a dream. He has no control over you now. Look at me. Listen to my voice. You are strong.” ‘Find your strength, Avalon.’ 

Avalon blinks as light comes back to her eyes. She reaches out to Sesshomaru wrapping her arms around him and dragging herself off of Kagewaki’s body.

“GET BACK HERE AVA!” Kagewaki commands angrily.

Avalon continues to cling to Sesshomaru desperately. 

Sesshomaru lifts Avalon bridal style in his arms. “Change it. He is not here in your dream. Take us where you want to go.” 

Avalon lifts her face to his and kisses him with deep passion and gratitude. She closes her eyes and thinks of one of the places she has always wanted to go with him, to her house in the future. The world swirls around them in a blur and it slows as the scene changes. They are in her bedroom. Back at her home. “My room in the future,” she speaks to him for the first time. 

He sets her down and immediately finds the life-size picture of himself. He points at the strange drawing confused. “This?” 

“What you look like in the series,” she says smiling at him. 

He traces his own chin. “Series?” He chooses to ignore it. There is a reason he came here. Here they could feel no bond between them, he could erase her memories of Kagewaki, the samurai and the first who violated her. Would she still come to him? ‘What if you didn’t know about this series?’ he thinks and changes the room, the picture is gone, he takes the memories of him from her and he stares at other pictures, of how people are dressed in her time, but decides to only remove his traditional armor and sword. 

“What are you doing in my room? I’m going to call the police,” she says in English surprised to see someone in her home. 

‘Perhaps I should have left her knowledge of the language.’ He lets her have that back.

“Leave or I’ll scream,” she warns. 

He sits down on her bed, surprised by how bouncy it is and touches the top, curious at the strange material and how high it is off the floor. “You are scared of me,” he says lacing his fingers together over his knees. 

“You're a stranger in my home. Get out!” She runs to her cell phone dialling 9-1-1. 

He stops whatever the contraption in her hand is, making it disappear. “You are not even curious about me?” It hits him rather dolefully that in this reality she lacks the excitement she should. 

“I am now, how did you do that? How did you make my cell phone disappear?” she says backing up from him. 

“I did not come to hurt you.” He twirls his hand in the air producing a sakura flower and walks up to Avalon, sliding it into the hair over her left ear. “I am not human.” 

“Obviously,” she admonishes, hitting the back wall. “What are you?” 

“Dog demon,” he says plainly. 

“You don’t look like a dog,” she says wryly. 

“Take my hand.” He holds his striped hand out to her. “Do not touch the claws.” 

Avalon looks down at his hand curiously. ‘He can make things appear and disappear. If he wanted to do something to me he could have already.’ She reaches her hand out taking his hand, careful of the claws 

“If I wanted to do something, I would have already,” he echoes her thoughts and takes her to the window, searching for a clear area. ‘This world is strange,’ he thinks taking her into the air. There are tall things with windows, and strange moving things below and sounds he hasn’t heard before. “I hear your thoughts, Avalon.” 

“Well that’s unfair,” she pouts. ‘But it’s cool he can fly!’ she thinks excitedly. 

He flies high into the sky remembering she had liked the rush of free falling, but as he does, he hauls her onto his back and his body begins to change form. His face breaks into a smile, merging his stripes into a V that trace his mouth. His hair flows as long ruff as his body shifts into his dog form. 

Avalon can’t help but be excited this is invigorating. “You are a dog after all!” she says happily. “Where are we going?” she asks 

‘Not a common dog, Onaga,’ he thinks, allowing her to hear it. She would never be able to in the real world, but here, where he had more control was different. 

“Onaga?” she asks, confused. 

‘A bird,’ he answers her, flying until the ground below them is miniscule and looks like a map or a miniature city. ‘Fly with me.’ He lets gravity take them as he nosedives towards the surface. 

Avalon grabs his fur screaming with exhilaration. ‘Obviously he isn’t an ordinary dog. Too big and they can’t fly. Dog demon,’ she thinks while her voice rings out. 

He pulls up, flying along the surface of the buildings, twirling his body around them and then soars high and dives again, enjoying her screams. 

‘You keep this up and I’m going to lose my voice,’ she chides in her mind. ‘Is that your goal dog demon, make the mortal woman lose her voice?’ She laughs out. 

Sesshomaru changes his form again and hers, slowly flying back to her bedroom, but this time her clothes are off and so are his. He’s made her a virgin and closes his mind to her as he lands in her room, kissing her mouth, holding the back of her head with one hand while the other grips her bottom. ‘Would you have come to me like this?’ 

Avalon kisses him back unaware that she is naked until he moves against her and she feels the sensation of skin against her stomach. She pushes him away covering herself. “What...what… is this?” she grabs the blanket from her bed wrapping herself, looking at him confused and slightly betrayed. “I’m a virgin,” she says, shocked at his audacity to strip her and him naked without her consent. ‘Not that there isn’t possibility here’. 

“A dream,” he answers her, walking forward, taking one of her hands and setting her palm against his chest. “A dream,” he says more wistfully. 

“You're in my dreams?” she asks, confused. 

Sesshomaru backs away, willing their clothing back into existence. ‘I should have known.’ He produces another sakura flower and sets it in her hand. 

Avalon takes a closer look at his clothing. “You’re not from my time are you?” she asks, gently walking towards him. 

He shakes his head, curious where she would take this. He had meant to exit her dream here, to leave her. She did not want him, did not trust him. 

“Then you might not realize how stripping me...us of our clothing would seem. We date, then we marry, then we do that. I’m not opposed to getting to know you better and seeing where things go,” she says, looking into his eyes. 

He approaches her again taking her hand, setting it on his chest, while willing just his hanjuban and hankimono away and her shirt, leaving her bare from the waist up. He holds his hand over her heart. “You feel nothing?” His mouth is only inches from hers. 

Avalon considers how she is feeling. “I feel drawn to you, but the way I was raised tells me to get to know you, before we do more...um...uh...intimate acts,” she says with a deep blush on her cheeks. 

“Ask,” he says panting and kisses her mouth more tenderly. 

“You said you're a dog demon? How old are you?” she asks inquisitively. 

“Over 900 winters.” He closes the gap between them, kissing her mouth again. “Ask.” 

“Why are you um...uh...interested in me?” she asks now that she knows his age and race. 

“Beautiful, powerful.” He lifts her palm to his mouth, tenderly sucking on her skin, up her wrist and arm. He mouths her shoulder and then her neck, flicking his tongue against her skin. “Ask.” 

“What do you do, I mean, I work with people translating to make money so I can buy food and keep a roof over my head. Do you work? Do you need food?” 

“Warrior...raw meat,” he says as his lips return to hers and he raises his hand, cupping one of her breasts, massaging it. “Ask.” 

Avalon gasps at the sensation of him touching her breast. “How do I know you are real?” she says panting feeling desire pooling in her abdomen. 

“Shhh,” he hushes her, letting his mouth fall on her neck, down her collarbone and then suckles on her other breast. ‘Two hands, like this I can hold you with two hands.’ 

Avalon breath hitches as his mouth moves on her breast. She rocks her hips into the bed attempting to relieve some of the desire she is feeling. 

He lifts her body further onto the bed, removing the rest of their clothing. His mouth comes back up to hers, taking in her lips, the feel of her body as she saw it before. She was just as muscled as she was for him in real life. He traces the lines on her stomach with the pad of his finger and then comes down cupping her apex, as he leans over her. 

Avalon rocks into his hand losing herself into him. His touch is sensual and his lips were divine. She continues rocking her hips as juices start to drip from her sex. 

He feels a guilt, knowing that like this he will be her first, pushing one finger inside her core. “Relax,” he mutters, kissing her neck and her shoulders and then returning to her mouth, while his thumb finds her bud, giving it circular attention. 

Avalon muscles tense at the invasion inside of her but soon she relaxes again rocking her hips as he brushes her clit. She kisses him with passion devouring his mouth. 

He pushes a second finger in and begins stretching her in scissor-like motions, teasing her core, while stimulating her bud. 

Avalon moans against his lips from pain and pleasure. It was so unfamiliar to her. She opens her legs wider while her thighs thrust up when he hits her just right. 

He remembers she likes it deep and pushes his fingers in deeper, keeping the pressure on her bud, then kisses her chest, spending time swirling his tongue around her nipples. He can feel her tightening, the pressure and the way she is clamping down on his fingers. “So close,” he whispers in her ear, rocking his hand with her hips. 

Avalon moans as the pleasure keeps building in her stomach and her muscle contract and stiffen. Suddenly, when she reaches a peak, juices flow more freely from between her legs and her mind enters bliss. 

He smiles, it’s a dream, and he won’t tell her of it. His hand is damp from her center. He replaces his fingers with his shaft, sliding into her while she was lost in her bliss, pinning her wrists over her head and then lowering his body closer to her, cupping her face in one hand and her ass in the other. He groans into her neck as he takes her. “So strong.” 

Avalon’s arms wrap around him pulling him to her body. Her legs wrap around his waist pulling him into her. She moans in a bit of pain from his size and the tearing of her hymen but she feels mostly just the pleasurable sensation of having him so close to her. She rocks against him slowly enjoying the gentle pace. 

“Do you love me?” he asks her, wondering if it has already happened. Did she fall for him, someone who cannot love her back, who can’t be what she needs. 

Avalon blinks lost in her bliss. “Love you?” she asks. ‘Do I love this demon I just gave myself to?’ “I do,” she says softly, bringing her lips to his again. 

He returns the pressure of her mouth and gasps his need increases and the pace quickens, until he coats her womb. ‘How it should have been,’ his own words echo in his mind and he gives her mind a picture of the future he cannot give her. Two days later they lay in bed together, he comes to her in the night again and tells her she is pregnant. Several weeks after that, he tells her it’s a boy and five months later he holds her under a tall camaphor while she births the child. He breaks the dream, leaving her mind just as the child slides between her legs, covered in lanugo and vernix, slippery and fat. 

Sesshomaru pants at the exertion invading Avalon’s dream, not on his body but his mind. Guilt bleeds through him as he leaves her in the room, in search of someone to batter. ‘Spar...I need to spar.’ 

Avalon wakes up on the futon seeing that it is dark outside. She sits up noticing Sesshomaru isn’t in the room. ‘Where is he?’ Avalon slides out of the bed and walks to the door. She is bored and was interested in learning more about the ancient dialect . She sees a servant walking the hall. “Hey you, where is the library?” 

The female dog-demon turns around, raising an eyebrow at Avalon. “This one is not called you,” the words come out clipped. Her silver hair is tied in elaborate braids, with fancy combs. 

“My apologies, what is your name?” Avalon says to her, looking the woman over. 

“Ainu,” she says with a grin that reveals her fangs. (Goddess of fertility) 

“Ainu, please lead me to the library,” she says lightly.

“This way.” She leads her down a long corridor, purposely walking quickly to make it difficult for Avalon to keep up without jogging. 

Avalon keeps up with her undaunted by her fast pace. Avalon’s breathing is even as she asks, “Are you in a particularly hurry Ainu?” 

“Do you have difficulty keeping up?” the woman snaps back. 

“Not really, just wondering where the fire was?” Avalon shrugs her shoulders unbothered. 

The demoness stops abruptly and turns around, facing Avalon. “And I bet you think you are the only one that has quenched his fire.” She waits for the admission to hit Avalon. 

Avalon looks at the servant critically. She knew instantly what she had just implied. “I am aware he has had other partners,” she says without hesitation.

“Then you know that he will never love you. You cannot give him what he wants. You can come here and threaten us with your reiki but at the end of the day, you will never be anything more than a mistress to bring pleasure, a flea...nothing.” She returns to leading the way to the library. 

Avalon follows her, allowing her reiki to create a barrier around them, stopping Ainu’s advance. “You know nothing. He is my mate and I am his. We are bonded, did you know that? You are the flea. The insignificant one. He will never love you. You are only being spiteful,” her voice drips with contempt. 

“And he will still come back here, to me or another one of our females to reproduce the heir you can’t. He bonded you by accident not by choice. That is not love, it’s pity.” 

“The bond is permanent. It matters not if it was an accident. There is a fire that only I can quench. He will always return to my bed. Even if he does want an heir with one of you it will only be that of a concubine. He needs your kind only for that. How sad,” she says, pitying the female who was trying to intimidate her. 

“Interesting,” the grin broadens on her face. “That’s not what he was speaking to his mother about while you slept. Now, the library is this way, Sesshomaru-sama’s concubine.” 

“I am not his concubine. I would never believe words from a snake like you.” Avalon allows the barrier to drop with a smirk on her face acting as if the words had no effect on her. ‘I will talk to Sesshomaru later about this.’ “You know I think I have changed my mind. You are no longer needed. You may go,” Avalon says dismissively, she starts going in a different direction. 

“It is you who is no longer needed. Raped, a whore to how many men and bonded out of pity. You are nothing!” Ainu calls after her, folding her arms. “How sad he had to ask his mother...well...that’s for him to say, so desperate is he to get rid of his mistake.” 

“ _ You _ are dismissed,” Avalon calls over her shoulder airlily continuing to walk away with her head held high. 

“And to think he wasted his yoki on someone who has seen more use than the local watering hole,” Ainu laughs while walking down the hall away from Avalon. “Mmh, I love his scent when he sweats.” 

Avalon ignores her jab, continuing on her walk to the kitchen. She steps through the door and smiles. “Evening.” 

Hiromaru has his head inside of shika and is making piles of their entrails. His scraggly black hair is tied back into a braid. The shika is on a decline, allowing the blood to be caught in a sieve. “Is that Avalon-sama I smell?” 

“Who else has my scent?” she asks lightly. 

“Your mate.” He pops his head out of the belly of the carcass. “Especially after you know...but his yoki gives him away.” 

“Does that mean I smell like him?” she asks teasingly. 

“His scent is on you,” Hiromaru confirms, chucking the liver and pancreas into a pile. 

“What is your take on Ainu?” she asks thinking back on her words. 

“Jealous bitch, but I heard a bit of what she was shouting. Seems that there was some to do with Chie-sama and Gobodo-sama and Sesshomaru-sama in her room last night. But I can’t say more than that. Gobodo-sama will have my head if she hears me gossiping about her.” He goes to a small fountain of water against the wall made from stacked rocks and rinses his pudgy hands off. 

“So there was some talk then? Anything I should worry about?” Avalon asks, shifting her weight to lean against the wall. 

Hiromaru’s eyes dart back and forth, thinking. “Best come with me, back here. Only place I know no one will be able to hear.” He leads her to the back of the kitchen, down a hall and through a door into a padded room with blood stains. “This is where I kill them for eating. Walls are padded to keep the noise down.” He lowers his voice to a whisper, “mind you this is only what I’ve heard circling around the castle. It’s not right. I’ve never heard anyone ask before. He asked...well he asked how to break the uh...the bond between you two. I guess you’ve been through it eh? Like your little girl.” 

Avalon bites her lip. “I...um was held for five months,” she says quietly with her shoulders slumped. ‘Why does he want to break our bond?’ A tear slips past her guard before wiping it away quickly. 

“Yeah I heard that and some other times too. Likely a servant overheard him talking to his mother. You know we don’t care as much about that as humans do. You best get the rest from him. Palace is buzzing with it right now. How he bonded a Miko by accident and doesn’t want the bond. He’s a cruel one, but you should talk to him.” 

“Yeah,” Avalon wipes a few more tears away from her face “I’ll go.” Avalon puts her mask on and puts a proud smile on her face. “How do I look?” 

“Like you want to kill someone. Listen to me, I’ve known Sesshomaru-sama since he was born. His mother longer than that. You just gotta know how to get to his heart. He used to have one. Before...well...I can’t tell you about that, that will get me killed. But the quickest way to his heart is through his stomach,” he speaks excitedly. “He loves shika, freshly killed in their first year. He’ll eat a whole one without stopping and sleep afterwards, but you have to wait until he is nearby before you kill it. He likes when they are still warm, been that way since he was a child. And,” he scratches the rolls of fat on his chin, “have you noticed he likes you brushing his hair? Washing him?” 

“Isn’t the stomach the way to every man's heart? And yeah I’ve noticed he likes it when I groom him.” 

“You do that, brush his hair, wash him, bring him food and this!” Hiromaru leads her to the vat of still warm shika blood, ladling it into a wooden water bottle. “He’ll love it.” He hands the bottle to Avalon. 

“Yeah but will he love me?” she asks wistfully “I’m sorry, this is my problem. Thank you for your advice and your ears.” 

“Male Inu-youkai love when their females tend to them, especially if they don’t have to ask. It shows you know him and what he needs. Remember that and that old hag Ainu won’t have any room to talk.” He laughs, “they’re all just jealous because they tried to make him love them and got nothing in return but a few nights in his room before they were dismissed. She was a virgin. I hear all the talk around here, and she wanted to get pregnant but he got bored.” He laughs harder. “Couldn’t give him what he wanted. He hasn’t loved anyone.” 

‘He loved someone but who?’ “I will try my best. I guess, but Ainu is wrong on one point . She thinks I have seen a lot of action. It was only three that had me against my will and two are already dead by my hands,” she says with venom. “And the last one will die as well.” 

“Like I said she’s just a jealous bitch. They all are. He hasn’t sent for any of them and I heard he made a display with you right in front of Yuri. He normally needs a few if you know what I mean. They’re just mad that he hasn’t asked since he brought you.” 

“Well that is true,” she smiles thinking of that time. “But if someone comes asking, I’m not ashamed of it anymore and I am proud that they no longer walk the earth in a way. I didn’t cry because of being reminded of the rape. I cried because he wants to break the bond,” Avalon says sadly. 

“Well you best talk to him about it. And give him that blood. I heard his missing arm’s been hurting something terrible. It’ll help give him strength.” 

“Thank you Hiromaru-san.” Avalon bows her head. She fans her reiki out to feel for his aura. “I wonder.” She lifts the bottle to her lips tasting the blood. ’Interesting.’ “Sometimes I wish I could smell like you inuyoukai can,” she says looking up at him. 

“He’s been sparring in the practice room for a few hours now, trying to get used to fighting with one arm. Last I saw him, he was pretty battered too. Been chugging those pain vials.” 

“I must be going good evening,” she turns to follow his aura. She walks down the hall and around the corner to the dojo. She can feel his aura and another that isn’t nearly as powerful but definitely not to be messed with. She slides the door open to see Sesshomaru slamming his opponent on the ground. Sesshomaru is bloody and covered in sweat. “Hello,” she says standing at the door. 


	28. Painful Truths

He glances over his shoulder only for the inu-youkai he was facing to slam him against the ground. He lands with a thud on an already bleeding stomach and rolls, reaching for his opponent’s neck, his hand lighting green. The other one leaps backwards flying into the air as Sesshomaru dashes back after him. 

“Distractions Sesshomaru!” he taunts Sesshomaru from a corner. “You can’t afford them now!” 

Sesshomaru doesn’t speak. He flies at him again, with his arm outstretched, then flicks his whip to close the gap. The youkai spins, dodging it, sending his own, looping it around Sesshomaru’s ankle, sending him back first into the wall. “This may need to wait, Avalon.” He hacks the whip off his ankle and flies after the youkai again. The other youkai dodges him, flying left and right. 

“You’re off balance!” he taunts Sesshomaru. 

Sesshomaru snarls and grabs the youkai’s neck, only for them to take turns slamming each other into the walls. 

“Alright, is it alright if I watch?” she asks gingerly. 

Sesshomaru’s eyes bleed red, dilating, his skin changing from pale to white, then covers in fur as he smiles changing into his true form. The other follows and the two dogs face off. He lunges for the neck of his opponent, while the other attempts to leap onto his back. He’s off balance because of his missing leg, but compensates by putting more weight into his back legs. Flipping the dog off his back and rushing to pin it down. 

Avalon shakes her head eyeing the dogs fighting. She keeps her distance from them, holding the bottle of blood to her chest. She worries that Sesshomaru is pushing himself too hard, but she doesn’t want to embarrass him by interfering. Her eyes flick to the satchel full of vials wondering how many are left. She carefully makes her way over to check the bag and finds three unused vials. 

She smiles that he hasn’t used them all and goes back to the area she was in before watching the dog fight. As she watches, the words of Ainu echo in her head. ‘How many has he taken to that futon before her?’ “I’ll be back,” she says happily as a devilish grin brandishes her lips. She walks down the hall till she gets to Sesshomaru’s room. She stands in front of the futon discontent filling her and the sword manifests in her hand. She pushes her reiki into the blade and slashes down at the futon tearing it apart as feathers and shredded material goes all over the room. 

“Much better.” She sighs happily. She walks back to the training area to watch the fight continue. 

By the end of the fight, Sesshomaru finally manages to gain somewhat of an upperhand, by rolling onto his back, then shooting up and grabbing the underside of the other white dog’s neck, throwing him on the ground. The dog yelps in defeat and they both change back into humanoid form, covered in bruises with gashes galore. Sesshomaru’s shoulder bleeds, as well as his stomach and hip and his back has new bruises on it. He approaches Avalon curiously. “Was someone bothering you? I sensed your reiki.” Sweat drips down his muscled chest and abs, mixed with blood. 

Avalon purrs, “Ainu,” as she offers him the flask. 

He takes it drinking down the liquid. “Shika blood?” He quickly finishes what is in the flask. 

Avalon nods. “Hai, it tastes rather sweet, wouldn’t you agree?” she eyes him slyly 

He pecks her cheek, still breathing heavily. “Find two more,” he tells the other dog demon.

“I’m not up for another round,” the other one protests.

“Then three,” he focuses back on Avalon. “You tasted it?” 

“Hai, I was very curious,” she purrs as her right hand glides over his sweat soaked chest. 

“Leave,” he says to the demon in the room. “You are being very bold with this Sesshomaru.” 

“Am I any bolder than Ainu?” 

“She said something to you,” he says placidly. 

“She said many things to me including that I am your concubine,” she says seductively. “Is that what I am?” She rubs her other hand over his bleeding shoulder and brings her blood covered hand to her mouth. She smears the blood on her lips like lipstick, before plunging her finger in her mouth and sucking on it. 

“Have you been into the sake?” he asks her, confused at her strange behavior. 

Avalon shakes her head as her eyes lower. “What did you talk to your mother about while I slept Sesshomaru? Hmmm?” She wraps her arms around him and let his blood and sweat smear and soak into her kimono as she licks his neck. 

He pushes her off of him, taking her by the arm and leading her back to his room, getting annoyed with her behavior. He takes the stairs in one bound, then brings her back to his room, closing the door behind them. “Clean your face.” 

“Mmm.” She shrugs and goes to the basin to dip a cloth in and washes the blood of her face. “Happy?” 

“That conversation was private.” He takes a towel and dries off his stomach, inspecting the cut and his shoulder. 

“Not so private that a servant knows what was talked about. You intend to take an inu-youkai as a wife and have me as a mistress,” she accuses. 

He throws the towel violently into the corner of the room. “A human cannot rule by my side and you cannot give me a pure-blooded heir.” His fist clenches at his side. “I asked to have the bond broken.” 

“And how did that go? Hmmm?” Avalon spits out bitterly. 

“How do you think, Avalon? It’s still intact.” 

“Oh, too bad,” she patranizes him. “And why can’t a human rule by your side?” 

He suddenly notices the feathers on the floor and the shredded bed, then looks up furiously at Avalon. “Disrespect...again?” 

“It reminded me of Ainu and every other woman you have slept with. It can be replaced.” She shrugs unfazed by his furious looks. 

“You knew you were not the first!” he yells back at her, “and you will not be the last either!” 

“Oh ouch, that hurts.” She clutches her heart and swoons. “I did not know your previous conquests walked these halls Sesshomaru! I did not know you hated me so much that you wanted to be rid of me!” Real tears slip from her eyes. “You have no idea how much I care about you and how much I hurt right now!” She turns her back on him. 

He quiets at her confession and says, “you were not meant to learn of that conversation. I am who I am Avalon. If you know me as you think you do, you know this cannot work between us.” ‘Can it? She gave herself to this Sesshomaru. Do you remember the dream?’ 

“If the bond could be broken, what do you think that would do to me? Would you even care? My love for you has nothing to do with this bond.” She confesses, falling to the ground on her knees. 

“Love?” His mouth goes dry. “You do not know this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon covers her mouth in shock. She said that word but she resolves to just say what has been on her mind. “I feel for you. I would die for you. I have fallen for you. I feel how I feel,” she says pleadingly. 

“No,” he resists her, despite sharing her dream and how the warmth had spread through his heart. “I cannot love humans.” He kneels in front of her. “I cannot return your love.” He reaches for her hand, holding her palm. “I asked for you, so you can find someone who will return your affections. I cannot love you.” 

“Can’t or won’t even try?” she whispers out. 

“Do not ask me to answer that. I cannot love you. You cannot give me the heir I would need. I…” he clenches his teeth. “I did not want you to hear this conversation.” 

“So your solution is to make me a mistress and you get a wife and the kid you want?” she accuses with pain in her voice. 

“What other solution is there? You will not be respected. This is not your world. This is my world and there is no place in it for a human, a miko.” 

“But it is my world now. You know how strong I am. I will force them to respect me. You want an heir then take a...a inu-youkai to your bed for that purpose alone.” Her heart hurts giving that admission. She feels so broken inside saying it. “But don’t...don’t think you can put me in a corner to be used for your pleasure. I would rather die. I am no mistress.” 

“Arrogant,” he spits out at her. “There are many much stronger than you are. There is nothing attractive about a female that courts death. She would be my wife and the bond would compel both of us back to my bed. How am I any different than the ones that have forced you before? You did not come to my bed willingly. You came because I put my yoki inside of you and you could not resist. If this Sesshomaru did not at least try, what am I? No better than Naraku, than the Samurai? The one when you were fifteen?” 

“No you are not like them! Why would you think that? The bond wasn’t with my consent but if you have asked I would have given myself willingly to you. You could have talked to me!” 

“And break what has already been broken before you have had a chance to heal? To remove your last comfort?! You should appreciate I tried to free you from this fate. I asked for  _ you _ , to free  _ you _ .” 

“I don’t want to be free from you and now…” Avalon swallows the painful searing in her chest. “And now that you know it can’t be broken and I can’t be free, you make me your whore?” she whispers. 

“No,” he says firmly, still breathing heavily as he brings her hands to his heart. “I have no such plans for now. What compromise would soothe your heart? Until after Naraku is dealt with, you will be the only female in my shredded bed. I will not take another until after then.” 

“And then what? My fate is sealed?” she says looking up into his eyes as tears pour down her face. “I am to what? Be happy?” Her head drops as her body gives out on her 

Sesshomaru takes a knife out from his ankle, underneath his hakama and puts it in her hand, bringing it up to his neck. “Then take my life and you will be free. I will not stop you.” 

“I could never kill you. I could never do that. I want you to be mine, why would ending your life help me. I could kill myself and free you but I could never harm you,” Avalon’s hand shakes trying to get her hand away from the knife. 

“You must live,” he tells her firmly, kissing her, throwing the knife down. “I have lived for 900 years. I wanted to free you, Onaga. Not because I thought less of you, because you must live and I cannot love you. I cannot be the one you love.” 

“You don’t get to choose who I love, Sesshomaru. Live with me or I will have no will to go on,” she says crashing her lips to his. 

“And when your life is threatened because of me? And I cannot protect you and you cannot protect yourself?” He lifts her chin up. “What then? Love is weakness. You have experienced enough pain. They will come in droves to kill you, to kill any hanyou I sire, to kill this Sesshomaru.” 

“Inuyasha lives, he is a hanyou. We can’t know what will happen. Love isn’t a weakness it is strength. To have something to protect is a most potent force.” 

“I will protect you,” he grips the back of her neck, “I cannot love you and the hanyou only lives because mother willed it. I can’t.” 

“So protect me, keep me by your side. I don’t want to go anywhere,” she says desperately, wrapping her arms around his neck and shoulders. 

“You don’t understand.” He returns the distress of her embrace with his own. “You will never be safe. I can’t free you.” He kisses the inside of her neck. “I can’t love you. I will not take another, Avalon. Not until after Naraku is defeated.” 

“Are you saying that to convince me or yourself?” she asks him gently. 

“I had no plans to take a mate now. To sire children now. I have not found one worthy to bare me children that will rival my power. Onaga,” he mutters against her ear. “I will not look until after Naraku is defeated.” 

Avalon head drops defeated, there would be no convincing him now. “I will submit for now,” she says distantly. 

He knows he’s hurt her and it makes his own chest ache. “I have taken no other while you have been here.” He tries to comfort Avalon. “You will be by my side until Naraku is defeated and the only one in my bed.” He picks up a handful of feathers and drops them on Avalon’s head. “Is this your handiwork?” 

“It is. Can you tell Ainu to fuck off?” she asks meekly. 

He takes another handful dumping it on her head. “Fukko offo?” Sesshomaru pushes her into the pile of feathers, jumping on her waist, and tickling her stomach to relieve the tension between them. 

Avalon laughs. “Ummm...word from the future and my own native tongue but everyone knows what it means in my time. Basically I would love for her to go away but it’s a much stronger implication: burn in hell, die, be tortured over a bed of knives. I think you get my drift here.” 

He nods, knowingly. “Fuko offo for destroying this Sesshomaru’s bed.” He grabs shreds of the material and the grey goosefeathers and covers her in them, turning her on her stomach and tickling the dips in her knees. 

“No, for calling me a whore and telling me that I’ve seen more action than a watering hole,” Avalon says in a huff, not amused, remembering her words 

Sesshomaru stops abruptly and pulls Avalon up by the arm. “Why would she say that? Dammit!” He slams his fist sideways against the wall. He attempts to pick feathers out of Avalon’s hair and face but she’s covered in them now and so is he. “She will be dealt with. Mother would not appreciate her repeating what was said in private.” 

“Well it was kind of her words that made me hate the futon so much,” she says lightly. 

“The futon can be replaced.” He pulls Avalon onto his lap. “But it will lack your scent and this Sesshomaru will have to break it in. I wonder if his mate would help?” 

“How many females have you slept with in the castle?” Avalon asks curiously. 

A guilty look crosses his face and he starts tallying them up on his fingers, naming names under his breath, going through his hand three or four times before he gives up. “Many.” 

“How many could you smell on that futon?” Avalon waves at the mess all over the room. 

“Only you. I have not been back to this castle in a century. It has been more than a year since I have bed a woman before you. I have been searching for power, not pleasure.” 

“Well you said many had been in that bed too many to count?” she edges 

“I am 900 years old--”

Avalon leans forward kissing him, silencing him. “The new futon will be easy to count. It will just be me and you,” she says lovingly. 

“We will make Ainu clean this mess.” He kisses Avalon tenderly, licking the roof of her mouth. “You slept well?” 

“Yes and no and then yes?” Avalon shrugs. “I just feel like my dreams were all over the place.” 

“Do you remember your dream?” 

“Sometimes. I remember part of last night, I remember Naraku commanding me to………..but then I don’t know it’s weird,” Avalon confesses. “Either I remember my dreams or I don't. They don’t usually break up. Did you have something to do with that?” she asks curiously. 

“No,” he keeps a straight face. ‘She doesn’t remember.’ He picks more feathers from her nose. “What will your punishment be?” He changes the subject to something else. “For destroying your mate’s bed?” 

“Definitely, I would have to make my mate break in the new bed with me,” she says nodding her head. She smiles, looking up at him slyly. 

“He would want her in a new position, but he would first have to remind her of submission!” He grabs Avalon by the ankle knocking her over and starts tickling her again, this time ripping at the sides of the kimono to get at her skin. He goes for her ribs, her sides, and her groin. 

Avalon laughs squirming around trying to get out of his grasp. Her stomach starts hurting because she laughs so hard “Please stop...please stop!” she says between laughing and struggling to get away. 

He flips her on her stomach and sits on her back going for her armpits. “Submit Onaga!” He can’t help but let his lips twitch. 

“I submit!” she says between laughing and throwing her feet out like a frog. 

He ceases tickling Avalon and leans over her ear. “Then you will submit and bathe this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon takes a few deep breaths to catch her breath. “Happily.” She turns her head to steal a kiss from him. 

He kisses her back, still perching on her lower back, but finally gets up. “I heard another rumor early this morning, about your Hikari.” He rises off the floor, opening his trunk to remove a kimono. 

Avalon gets up looking at what is left of the kimono she was wearing. “What did you hear?” she asks, walking over to retrieve a yukata to wear to the bathing area and a kimono to come back to the room in. 

“It seems someone has taken a liking to her. A young man,” Sesshomaru says mischievously. 

“Oh?” Avalon looks at him curiously. “And who might this young youkai be?” 

“His name is Doumaru, he goes up to here?” He can’t avoid grinning when he points to his hips. “He’s just into his eighties.” He leads her to the washroom. 

“Hiromaru’s boy?” 

“Yes.” He opens the door to the bathing area bringing her in. “Apparently he found her last night and has decided she must be his.” 

“He seems like a mischievous boy, it’s cute.” 

Sesshomaru unties his hakama and lets them drop on the floor, then steps into the water sighing at the heat and how it relaxes his muscles. He thinks of the picture of himself on the wall in Avalon’s room and what she has said of him. “Would the one I was in the future love a human?” 

“Hai, he is quite capable of loving a human.” 

“You base my actions off of this?” 

“No, I just know individuals can change. I have hope for the future. Is that so wrong?” 

“When did this  _ great  _ change happen?” he asks, half sarcastically, half interested, not wanting to cause her pain than he already has. 

Avalon disrobes and joins him in the bath. “It was gradual. It was not just like you woke up one morning loving humans.” She shakes her head. “But it started with Rin.” 

“No,” he argues, turning to face her. “It started with you.” He rests his face on her shoulder, hugging her waist, tasting her balmy skin. 

Avalon feels a tear slip down. His admission touched her heart so deeply. She wraps her arms around him as she rests her head on the side of his face. 

“When I am with you, my heart is warm. When you cry, it aches. I don’t understand...what I feel, but I know this Sesshomaru yearns for your happiness.” 

Avalon smiles and whispers, “That sounds like the budding of love Sesshomaru,” she turns her head to kiss his cheek. 

“I am fond of you onaga.” He kisses her mouth. “I do not feel love.” 

Avalon rolls her eyes. ‘Just keep telling yourself that.’ “Sesshomaru, I want to tell you what I feel for you.” 

He nods, leaning his nose back into her neck, resting, while glancing at the water that has a slight red sheen from his blood. ‘At least I am not in pain.’ 

“I am happy when you are happy. I ache when I see you in pain. I worry when I see you hurt. My instinct is to protect you. When you were sparring with the other inu, I had to stop myself from interfering. Even when I am pissed at you, I still want you to be happy. Perhaps I am foolish and irrational but I would die for you, fight for you, and follow you wherever you would go, if you let me.” 

“Peeeesed? Is that Engolish?” 

“Hai, it means really really mad.” 

“You make this Sesshomaru peeesed too,” he says proud of himself. “Your faith is misplaced. I need time.” He moves closer, sucking on her neck. He could taste the sweet fruits on her neck as he tasted her skin. He moves her hair out of the way and gently clamps down with his fangs, leaving small imprints without drawing blood. “Your taste is pleasant.” 

Avalon moans with the contact, exposing her neck to him fully. 

“Do you still fear submission?” He licks up to her ear then stops. 

“Not so much any more, now that I understand it better,” she says languidly. 

He takes a washcloth and passes it to her. 

Avalon takes the washcloth and grabs a bar of soap turning around to start cleaning him. 

“And it’s pronounced pi..i..i..issed,” she chides, playfully. She says more seriously, “It’s not faith. It is feelings. I do not control them. I can pretend they are not there, but they are and we have time, Sesshomaru. We basically have thousands of years.” 

“As long as no one kills this Sesshomaru. Your feelings also warm my heart.” He turns his back to her so she can clean it. 

Avalon washes his back and trails kissing as she goes. “I am glad I warm your heart.” 

He groans at the feel of her mouth against his skin but then hisses when the cloth is brought over the gash in his shoulder. “Onaga,” he reprimands her. 

“Gomen.” She kisses the outside of the wound in apology. 

“Continue,” he whispers. 

Avalon moves his hair over his shoulder as she carefully washes his neck and shoulder avoiding any large gashes. “How soon till these heal?” she asks gently. 

“Tonight.” He groans, pushing his stump against the side of the bathtub and letting his head lull to the side. “This a few more days.” 

Avalon takes the opportunity of his fully exposed neck to bring her mouth down on it kissing, licking and sucking on the skin 

He holds her face, cupping her cheek, letting out small sounds of pleasure. 

With one final swip of her tongue she pulls away. “Any wounds I should just clean with water?” she asks lovingly by his ear. 

“Leave them.” He leans back against her chest, resting his cheek between her breasts. The air is permeated with her scent, making his body slump. “You don’t miss your life before?” 

“What life? The one where I was Naraku’s prisoner or before I came here?” she asks, confused. 

“Before you came here,” he mutters, turning his side into her and holding her like a pillow. 

“Not really, not much to miss,” she says dismissively. 

“Mmh,” he answers. “I would have told you of this discussion eventually. When the time came and I began looking for another. Perhaps when the time with the device was up. I did not want it lingering over your head.” 

“You would have been wrong to hide it from me,” she says, running her hands through his hair, cupping water and letting it pour along her chest and his hair. 

“I would not have hurt you again.” 

“You are very wrong, Sesshomaru,” she says, kissing the top of his head where she can reach. 

He opens his mouth to speak then closes it again. ‘She is still too fragile. So strong, but so fragile.’ 

Avalon’s hand moves along the side of his ab, dipping into his groin, lightly touching his member with her fingers. 

He turns his face into her chest, smirking where she can’t see. “Do you want something from this Sesshomaru?” 

“I do,” she says, seductively. 

He sits up, somberly turning to face her and caresses her cheek bone with his thumb. “This also warms my heart, that you ask for what you feared.” 

Avalon rubs her face against his palm turning to kiss it. “I don’t fear you Sesshomaru,” she says lovingly. 

“Was that what drove you to the cliff that day?” He pulls her face to his. “Do not lie to this Sesshomaru. You feared I would turn you into a bed warmer, a vessel for pleasure.” 

“I feared that but what am I now? What will I be after…” she trails off. 

“A friend,” he kisses her mouth. “A companion.” 

“But we will always be drawn to each other's bed,” Avalon says sadly. 

“Do you understand now why I asked? It was not to hurt you.” Their lips connect again. 

“But the solution you have come up with,” she says, bringing their lips together again, wanting to drown her pain in his body. 

“I give myself to you until Naraku is defeated.” He slides her into his lap. “What happens after, will happen. For now, this Sesshomaru is yours.” 

Avalon slides her body further down, bringing her hips low, searching for him to enter her. “You are mine for now,” she says against his lips. 

He nods. “Now tell this Sesshomaru what you want,” he whispers. 

“Take me, here and now,” she says pleadingly. 

Sesshomaru’s body shakes lightly. The pain had started just after he got into the bath. He leans in and slowly kisses Avalon, curling his fingers around her chin. The steam from the tub makes his skin feel hotter. “Soon.” He lets his hand glide along her slick body, fingers beginning to shake. ‘Let me finish this,’ he tells his body. 

“Are you okay?” she asks, noticing his hand shaking. 

He groans, leaning against her neck. “I should not have transformed.” 

“You’re hurting again. Where is the satchel?” she asks, running her hand along his cheek soothingly. 

“The dojo.” He laps at her neck. “Take what you need from this Sesshomaru.” He leans back, bringing her closer to his shaft. 

“I can’t do that when you are suffering. I can wait,” she says, lovingly. 

“It can wait. I will be fine,” he sags against Avalon’s shoulder. 

“Are you sure?” she says gingery. “I want you to enjoy it too, it’s not just about me.” 

“I can scent your pain, your upset. You want comfort. Find rest in my arm. There’s time before it gets worse.” 

Avalon is unsure of her desires at that moment. She brings her lips to his seeking comfort in them. While her hands delve into his hair. She opens her legs to wrap them around his body. Satisfied with the close contact. Sex was not always the key to curing her hurt. 

He slides his hand up and down her back, returning the kiss, letting their tongues meet, their lips finding warmth against each other. He tries to angle her closer again to his shaft, encouraging her to take more if she wants it. “It’s okay, you can take more.” 

Avalon feels his hardened member against her, closing her eyes. She still wanted him, so she slides herself to let him slip inside her fold. She sighs contently when he fills her. She rocks her hips lazily, having him slip up and down within her. “Is this okay?” she whispers. 

He nods, gripping her hips and leaning back against the tub. The sensation of their bodies together shifts his mind from the growing pain in his missing arm to something more pleasurable. He caresses her stomach, bumping his palm over her hardened abs. ‘No, she is more solid now than she was then.’ 

Avalon stares intently into his eyes as she quickens her pace, her body is desperate for the release, she moans with pleasure feeling her stomach tightening and her back straining. The water sloshes as she moves faster and faster until she finally comes with a scream of pleasure and her walls contract around his shaft in rhythm. Her mouth crashes down on his kissing him with abandon. 

He lets her take what she needs from him, returning the desperation of the kiss. He moans at the contact but the building pain keeps him from finding his own satisfaction. He pulls out of Avalon still stiff, but ignores it. 

Avalon notices he didn’t find his own release. “I want you to have your release too,” she says tenderly 

He shakes his head. “Unnecessary.” 

Avalon kisses his lips lightly. “I will return in a few moments,” she says, getting ready to leave the tub. 

He nods, lowering his left side into the water. He had not felt pain since the day before. ‘At least it was longer this time.” 

Avalon grabs a towel, wrapping it around her hair and then throws on the yukata before taking off to the dojo. She runs down the hall and up the stairs. She slides the door open finding the satchel and grabbing it, checking the content before slinging it over her shoulder and dashing back to the bathing area. Avalon pulls out a vail opening, handing it to Sesshomaru. “Here,” she says a little out of breath. 

He takes it and drinks, slightly sticking his tongue out at the bitter taste and sets the vial aside. He pulls Avalon closer to his chest and places a chaste kiss on her forehead. “Just rest with me.” 

Avalon nods, stripping off the yukata, towel, and the bag with the vials, placing it in a spot where she will not forget it. She steps into the warm water joining him. She leans her back against the tub. 

He presses his chest into her side. “I am sorry. Perhaps I should have let you die and used tenseiga. My presence has only brought you pain.” 

Avalon wraps her arm around him. “No, you have not only brought me pain, you have brought me pleasure, warmth and a sense of belonging. I may have been alive in my world but I was not living. I had no connections. I doubt anyone has even realized I am missing other than my bill collectors.” 

“This Sesshomaru would notice your absence. You will be protected when we leave. Naraku will be killed for what he has done to you.” 

Avalon sighs despondently. “Part of me doesn’t want him to die any more,” she whispers. 

“He would never stop hunting, haunting your dreams. If he took you from this Sesshomaru, what would he do to you?” He raises an eyebrow at Avalon. “Hikari—“ 

“That isn’t what I mean. I meant once he is gone, you won’t be…” she trails off as she blinks back her tears swallowing thickly, she continues “You will look for another. As long as we are hunting him, it’s us.” 

He shakes his head, holding her tightly. “I would not leave you wanting. You would have a home, servants, food, clothing. I would come when you sent for me. You will still have this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon shakes her head. “I rather have just you, I don’t want to leave your side.” 

Sesshomaru curls his fingers, rubbing Avalon’s stomach. “I am not leaving you now. Why must you have my love? Now? This was not what I wanted. To take a human as a mate. Yet I accept this. I did not ask for your love or your loyalty. Only your trust. I would have waited months, years for you to come to my bed. You cannot do the same?” 

“I said I want to be at your side, your love is something I am willing to wait for, if it ever comes, “ she says tenderly. 

“So you can watch this Sesshomaru bring another to his bed?” 

“Do you think it hurts any less not seeing it if I know it?” she shakes her head forlornly. 

“And you ask why I tried to break this bond. This is not freedom. I am your captor.” 

“I understand why you wanted to break the bond, I do. You are right but I would not take your life to free myself. I could never do that. I care too much for you. I care more for you than my own freedom. You would only take one other? One to have to produce an heir?” she asks her heart breaking, asking the question wondering if she could watch that, be part of that. 

“For an heir and for love. There will never be more between us than friendship.” 

Avalon’s head falls back as tears come uncontrollable. “You could love her but not me? Why?” she asks with a shaky voice. 

“You are human.” He kisses her neck. “I don’t know if I would love her. I do not know love.” 

“I think I would still want to be by your side, my pain would be more being away.” 

“No. Enough Avalon,” he says as he rises out of the tub. “It’s enough that for now this Sesshomaru is yours.” 

“For now,” she says meekly while whipping her tears away. 

He nods and sits on the rock, drying his hair. 

Avalon splashes her face with some water, washing the salty trails away. She gets out of the tub, grabbing a towel, wrapping it around herself and grabbing another and sits behind Sesshomaru. She runs the towel gently through his hair, drying it for him. “I’m sorry,” she says quietly. 

He shakes his head, waiting for her to finish while examining the injuries from sparring. He would have to be more careful of his left side. 

Avalon finishes drying his hair, then she runs her fingers through it, untangling any knots with the delicacy of a butterfly before moving on until his hair is straight and free of any tangles. 

“I think Onaga likes my hair.” 

“It is wonderful. I wish my hair felt like it,” she says, whispering by his ear. 

“There are other enjoyable things about your body.” He takes a clean Kimono that was hanging on the wall and hands it to Avalon to put on him. 

Avalon holds it open, sliding the one sleeve over his arm and then over the stump. She grabs an obi that is nearby and ties it around him. Avalon shakes her head. ‘One does not talk about friends like that.’ 

“Get dressed. I asked that breakfast be brought to one of the gardens. You may join this Sesshomaru, or mother in her dining hall.” 

Avalon smiles, shaking her head, grabbing her kimono and putting it on. “Hmm, joining the man I want to be with? Or eat with a woman who frightens me? I wonder which I will choose?” 

Sesshomaru takes her hand and leads her to the first door out of the washroom. He stops abruptly and pulls Avalon next to him, whispering quickly in her ear. “Ainu is in the hallway. You will submit to this Sesshomaru, completely, no matter what I do to you. You will show her and the others that you are worthy of our bond.” 

Avalon nods. “I will submit to you,” she says quietly. 

Sesshomaru slides the door open taking Avalon through the first door and then through the entry room out into the hallway. He holds Avalon’s hand as they walk towards his door. 

Ainu walks out with feathers in her hair and all on her kimono. She had just finished cleaning up the room. ‘What did that whore do to the bed?’ Her eyes narrow seeing Sesshomaru holding Avalon’s hand. She purses her lips and holds her head high. She sways her hips temptingly walking towards Sesshomaru. 

Avalon’s grip tightens on Sesshomaru’s hand, but she keeps her shoulders loose and her face relaxed. 

Sesshomaru lets his mouth fall into a smirk as he pulls her face first against the wall and starts lifting up the back of her kimono. “I want you,” he growls in Avalon’s ear, low and sensuous, parting his own kimono and taking her from behind, quickly and forcefully. He reaches for the front of her apex to stimulate her bud and starts panting at how she feels against him. He kisses her cheek as he thrusts inside of her. 

Ainu’s teeth clench down as a low growl erupts from her throat. Her eyes alight with fury.

Avalon gasps looking over her shoulder at Sesshomaru watching him take her from behind. Her breaths shallow as pleasure builds inside her and her legs jump when he runs his thumb over her nub. 

Sesshomaru nuzzles her nose, slowly and seductively, moaning, once again shocked how it seems she fits him completely and her trust, knowing she needs to see him. He loses his composure, forcing her harder against the wall, pressing her bud more quickly until he can feel her dancing on her tiptoes. He’s never been able to finish this quickly. “Onaga,” he croons in her ear. 

Avalon moans. “My Sesshomaru.” 

Ainu’s hands clench into fists. She wants to slit the woman’s throat. Her yoki flares up as her teeth lengthen and her claws elongate. 

Sesshomaru chuckles at Ainu’s flawed attempt to get his attention. He pushes harder into her, until Avalon’s body thumps against the wall. He vibrates his finger over her bud, intensifying her reactions, making her grip him harder. “You satisfy this Sesshomaru. So tight,” he praises her, completely lost in their interaction. ‘Finish, scream my name.’ 

Avalon’s pleasure keeps rising as her legs twitch until she feels the pleasant crash where her body stiffens for a moment screaming her release. “SESSHOMARU!” as her body starts to relax.

Ainu wants to leap to attack Avalon. ‘I will teach the whore her place!’ 

Sesshomaru stimulates Avalon harder, not letting her relax as he comes against her. “Finish again,” he whispers in Avalon’s ear, not letting up. 

Avalon pants and her hips thrust with abandon as her mind feels bliss she feels herself coming again. “SESSHOMARU!” she half screams, half moans at her release. 

“This is submission.” He glares at Ainu, taking his hand out of her sex and licking it off. “Mmmh, such a sensuous taste. You can leave, Ainu. Your  _ services  _ are no longer required. This Sesshomaru is satisfied with his mate.” He pulls Avalon’s body next to his, helping to support her. “Should I make her finish again for you to see?” He pushes Avalon’s back against the wall and goes on his knees. “Give her what I refused you?” He pushes his nose into Avalon’s slit, lifting her left leg over his shoulder and then begins sucking on her clit. 

Ainu’s eyes go wide with disbelief and rage. She turns and stalks away. 

Avalon lounges back against the wall half falling asleep from exhaustion. 

Sesshomaru nuzzles her lower lips and then kisses the still bare skin and sits back on his haunches, with an arrogant look on his face. “Are you alright? Did I cause pain?” 

Avalon breathes deeply. “No, it was just intense,” she says, languidly. 

“She will not bother you again while I am here with you.” He takes Avalon by the hand and starts walking down the hall again to one of the gardens. “Did you decide to join this Sesshomaru? Or do you need bed now?” 

“I can lay next to you in the garden,” she says, lazily. 

Sesshomaru leads her up several flights of stairs, then out a large set of sliding doors onto a veranda that is set with a low table, filled with rice, fresh fruits, vegetables and cooked fish as well as several bowls of innards and raw meat still covered in blood. From there they can see the expanse of the sky, the clouds, and the tiny view of the earth below. He sits first, angling his lap for Avalon’s head. “Rest, Onaga.” 

Avalon nods happily laying with her head in his lap. “I’m still vibrating,” she says, distantly. 

“Would you have been able to finish again?” he asks as he takes a piece of fruit and holds it in front of her lips. “Can humans tolerate such an appetite?” 

“Maybe and some can we can always try and see,” she says as she opens her mouth wrapping her tongue around the fruit and his finger. 

He leans over her face and puts a piece of peach in his mouth, so it sticks out and lowers his mouth close to Avalon’s. 

Avalon opens her mouth hungrily taking the peach from his lips, while wrapping her hand around his head to bring her lips to his. 

He returns the kiss, lifting her back up and into his lap. They spend the rest of the morning making love, until Avalon is sore and can’t take anymore. Sesshomaru falls onto his back laughing with his clothing in complete disarray and hers mostly in shreds. It makes his heart warm when she curls into his side and he falls asleep, with the sun heating their bodies, uncaring if they are seen. 

The next few days pass with Avalon spending time between Sesshomaru and Hikari. Sesshomaru makes love to her when she wishes, which is often and they sleep in bed together. Avalon’s dreams are peaceful and she wonders if it is solely because he is sleeping next to her or if he has been guiding them while she slept. She would ask him and he would deny it. The day comes when he did not feel any pain for a whole day and he decided that they would leave the next day. They shared the bed that night and when Avalon wakes Sesshomaru is already dressed

He takes his armor, sliding it on and picks up Tenseiga. “Prepare to leave.” He’s focused, things will be different below. He will hunt for Naraku, they will be in danger. 

Avalon feels a slight loss as she feels like things will be changing. She gets up and quickly brushes her hair putting it in a bun. She starts packing up a few of the kimonos he gave her into the black bag she got from Kagome. She takes off her kimono and juban, pulling out a new pair of underwear and a sports bra putting it on. She grabs a pair of tight stretch jeans and puts them on followed by a tank top, then a kimono over the whole thing and a pair of black boots. “Alright,” she says despondently. “Let's go say our farewells to Hikari and go.” She slings the bag over her shoulder and waits for him. 

Sesshomaru approaches her curiously, seeing her strange garments. He pulls the front of her kimono open and then raises an eyebrow at the sports bra. “Why this? You would hide beuroestos from this Sesshomaru?” 

Avalon grins at him shaking her head. “It's not about hiding them, it's about being more comfortable while we travel. They tend to bounce and rub and get sore, so if I wear this they stay in place. Kind of how your fundoshi keeps your testicles from bouncing too much.” 

“They move in fundoshi.” He tugs again on the material again. “I do not like it. Take it off.” 

“So you rather I be in pain or aesthetically pleasing you?” she asks, looking him in the eyes. 

He slides his index finger between her breasts, snagging his claw on the material ripping it. “My yoki will cure your pain. Take it off.” 

“Your yoki heals me but I still feel pain, Sesshomaru. And constant rubbing causes constant pain,” she counters. 

He lifts her face up to his. “And when this Sesshomaru wants to see beuroestos? You bar his way with a useless fabric.” 

“I only wish to wear it while we are moving. I don’t need it when we are resting. I can take it off then,” she offers. 

He eyes her carefully then relents. “It comes off at night, all of your strange clothing. You will submit and wear the clothing this Sesshomaru gives you.” 

“I have no problem with that,” she says brushing her lips against his. 

“We leave.” He slides the door open and finds Hikari’s scent down one of the hallways. He follows it twisting past the kitchen.

“Oh can I stop and say goodbye to the cook?” 

“Go,” a small smirk crosses his face. “She’s hiding.” 

“Where is she!!” Doumaru comes running up behind them shouting, “Mate!!” 

Avalon is walking through the door when she hears a small voice crying, ‘mate.’ Avalon turns to look at who said it. She sees Doumaru smiling, thinking it cute. She walks over to him. “Who is your mate Doumaru?” she cooes at him. 

“Hikari. She is mine.” He sniffs the air, his tiny nose rises up. “But she has used something making it hard to smell. You smell like him.” He points at Sesshomaru. “He is your mate.” 

“He is my mate, you are right. But I have to tell you something Doumaru,” she says seriously getting down on his level. 

“What?” He leans forward until his nose is almost touching hers. 

“You know Hikari is ningen right?” 

“She is a pretty ningen. Not like you, ouch.” He cups an ear that was flicked by Sesshomaru. “She smells like the wind and has hair like night. She is mine.” 

Avalon shakes her head sadly. “She will only live for another 40 to 60 years.” 

“Not if I bond her, but my yoki isn’t strong enough yet.” He smells the air again heading into the kitchen and opening one of the cabinets to find Hikari with the spices. “I found you.” 

Sesshomaru touches Avalon’s shoulder and shakes his head. “He won’t understand.” 

Avalon sighs. “Well at least Hikari will have someone who wants to be around her.” 

“Why wouldn’t he want to be around her?” Hiromaru hobbles up. “He’s my son.” He ruffles the little boy’s hair. 

Avalon smiles widely. “I know, but our welcome has been less than warm.” 

“I told his mother to bring him,” Hiromaru says then glances at his son whose eyes are turning red. “Hey don’t you start that!”

“You hid her!” the boy yells, fangs growing and his skin changing to fur. He leaps at his father, in the form of a small white puppy with shaggy hair.

Hikari leaps out of the cabinet. “Doumaru! Stop it!” she rushes to stop him from attacking his father. “Doumaru, I was trying to hide from you!”

Hiromaru shakes his arm wildly trying to get the puppy off it. “Oi get off!” He bats at his face.

“Avalon, it’s time,” Sesshomaru says softly from the corner of the kitchen. 

“Hiromaru-san do you need any help?” She walks steadily towards the scene of chaos. 

“You just wait until I tell your mother you little mongrel!” Hiromaru tries to pry the puppy’s jaw off his wrist. 

The puppy whines and quickly changes back into a boy falling on his knees bowing. “Please don’t tell ka-chan!” 

Avalon rolls her eyes. She walks over to the young boy and ruffles his hair. “Hiromaru-san we are leaving now thanks for everything. Can you do me a favor and keep an eye on Hikari. I just want her safe.” 

“I will Avalon-sama. Just remember what I told you,” he winks at her. 

Avalon looks over at Sesshomaru. She bows her head to Hiromaru and walks over to HIkari. She gets down on her knees and hugs the girl fiercely. “I am going to miss you.” Tears build in her eyes 

Hikari’s face is already soaked. “Just like this? I don’t want you to go! Please onesan? Don’t leave me again! Please?” she sobs. 

Avalon’s heart breaks seeing her begging to come with her. Tears slip down her cheeks. “Hikari, I love you. I don’t want to leave you. I wish I could take you with me and keep you safe but I know my enemy and I can’t guarantee even my own safety. You seem to have an admirer at least.” Avalon looks slyly at the boy bowing to his father. “We will see each other again. I promise. I have faith in that. Please believe me Sesshomaru-sama will be at my side and I have faith in him.” 

Hikari nods, unable to speak through her tears. She wraps her arms around Avalon’s shoulders, sobbing. Jaken Jr. comes through the door and pushes his muzzle against Hikari’s belly, whining to comfort her. 

Avalon holds tight to Hikari crying into her shoulder. “I love you sister.” She breaks the embrace. 

Hikari nods, face contorted in sorrow. 

Avalon steps away to be by Sesshomaru as tears still flow from her eyes. “Let.t.t’s g.o.o,” the words tremble from her lips. 

Hikari bows to them both, wiping her eyes. Doumaru hugs Hikari around the waist, nuzzling her. “It’s okay mate.” 

Sesshomaru lifts up Avalon’s hand, kissing the back and pulls her into the hallway. “Jaken!!” 

The little imp comes running at his name and bows down before Sesshomaru and Avalon “Hai milord?” 

“We leave.” He leads the way to the head of the castle. “Bring the dragon.” 

Jaken gets up. “Right away milord!” He skitters down the hall, tripping over his own feet, dropping nintojo and scooping it back up, running full tilt down another corridor. 

Avalon walks at Sesshomaru’s side, not saying anything with her head down. She feels so torn by leaving Hikari. 

Sesshomaru squeezes her hand reassuringly as they make it to the steps that exit the castle.

Jaken returns with the dragon. Sesshomaru strokes the scales, wondering whether or not to put Avalon on It’s back or fly with her. In her dreams she likes flying. He playfully nudges her off the steps and then flies after her, reaching for her hand. 

Avalon screams in fear, reaching for his hand 

He grabs her hand, pulling her back against his chest, holding her around the stomach. “Fly with me,” simpers in her ear. 

Avalon’s ankles wrap around his knees. “Don’t let me go,” she says as she puts her arms out like a plane 

“Did you think I would?” he yells over the whipping wind as he propels them forward. 

She yells back, “I didn’t think you would push me out of the castle, so who knows,” mischief laces her voice. 

“No fear,” he growls into her ear and lets her go, moving his body next to hers, holding her hand, so they fly spread eagle together. 

Avalon grasps his hand tightly. “Easy for you to say,” she counters, while trying to master the fear of the ground approaching quickly, knowing he won’t let her fall. 

Jaken follows them on the dragon calling “Wait for me!” trying to keep up at the rate they plummet towards the ground. 

Sesshomaru waits until they are about to hit the top of the forest and trees then grabs Avalon’s waist, lifting them both back up into the air. “Brave Onaga!” he raises his voice, carrying them up high into the clouds again, then lets her go, lacing his fingers through hers. “Fly!” 

Avalon feels the wind rushing through her hair and the kimono flaps open from the turbulence. She smiles letting her fear go and letting the freefall free her heart for the sorrow of leaving Hikari behind. 

Sesshomaru propels them forward as he searches for Naraku’s scent. ‘No sorrow, Onaga.’ He spies a waterfall ahead and smirks, grasping Avalon’s hand. They were already partly down the top of it. He knew this falls well, where the rocks were. He propels her faster towards that fast falling water. 

“Oh, no, no, no, no!” she says half heartedly as the waterfall comes closer. “I’ll be soaked!” 

Sesshomaru let’s her feel his chest vibrating with laughter as he soars up the falls and they burst through the top, splashing through white rapids and dodging boulders. 

Avalon holds her breath when she meets water and she simmers with slight irritation. Even though part of her feels like laughing. 

He lands them along the banks of the river, finally letting Avalon onto her feet. He can’t find Naraku’s scent, but that doesn’t matter. He would search for as long as it took. The trees are tall here, casting shadows on the lush green forest floor. “Come,” he tells Avalon as Jaken lands behind them. He goes to the dragon and pulls out the sea-green kimono he had first dressed her in after bonding her. He hands it to her and leaves her to clean herself up. 

“You don’t have to leave.” she says quietly as she walks to the dragon grabbing another bra and underwear out of her bag. She walks back behind a tree and starts stripping off her soaked clothing and setting them on a branch to dry. 

He continues searching for Naraku’s scent, circling the area. There were no trace scents anywhere. He growls under his breath then returns to Avalon and Jaken. “Jaken, find food for Avalon.” 

Avalon finishes dressing and comes out wrapping her arms around Sesshomaru’s neck pulling him into a kiss. “Arigato, that was fun,” she whispers against his lips. 

He nods, silently taking in her lips and then pulling her closer, plastering his body against hers, tasting the salt of unshed tears in her mouth. “She will be safe. Now we,” his mouth crashes into hers again, “hunt.” 

“He will die,” she says with determination. 

He nods again, pushing her back into a tree and groping her breast. “A gruesome death.” He squeezes it, while dipping his tongue into Avalon’s mouth. He licks the flecks of sweetness from the corners of her mouth, barely giving her time to breathe. 

Avalon regrets putting the bra on now. She pushes Sesshomaru away lightly. 

“What?” He stops himself, leaning over her panting. 

She smiles mischievously pulling the kimono down and then pulling her bra off then grabbing him by the armor pulling him to her, crashing her lips to his. 

He reaches for the ties on the armor and throws it to the side, throwing Tenseiga aside in the process and returns his body to Avalon’s, so aroused by her scent and an instinctual need to care for the sorrow he knows she feels. He kisses down her neck and captures one of her nipples. His tongue drags back up her neck to her mouth. “This Sesshomaru wants something from you.” They had not done this yet, he had not asked. 

“What do you want from me?” she asks panting against his lips. 

He pushes on her shoulder to make her kneel in front of him and raises a questioning eyebrow. 

Avalon looks up at him with wonder in her eyes. “You want me to suck on your penis?” she asks. ‘Really? So typically male.’

“As I have sucked on you,” he reminds her, confused with her expression. “I will do the same in return. You can stop before I finish.” 

She laughs with a smile on her face. She grabs the ties of his hakama letting them slide down his legs. “We may have to try 69 some time,” she says, and moves his fundoshi aside, taking his hardened shaft into her mouth. Her tongue swirls around the lip and the tip of her tongue dips into his hole slightly before she takes what she can into her mouth sucking on his flesh. Her hand moves to grasp his testicles and lightly massages them in her hand. She looks up at him, wanting to see how he reacts to her. 

He threads his fingers into her hair and starts rocking his hips lightly into her mouth. ‘How does she do this?’ He has never been more satisfied and felt more complete than when he is with Avalon. “Mhh,” he groans. 

Avalon uses her other hand to run up his shaft where her mouth can’t cover as she lets saliva drip from her mouth to moisten her hand to allow for an easier gliding effect. She sucks and moves her mouth and hand up and down his shaft in unison, continuing to roll his balls in her other hand. She enjoys knowing he is being pleasured by her and hopes he has never had a better blowjob in his long life.’I wonder what he would think if I stimulated his prostate gland, does he have one?’ She pushes her finger behind his sack, hard into the perineum, rubbing up and down with her knuckle. 

He jolts forward, gripping the tree to stay upright and thrusting hard into her mouth, eyes dilating and bolting open to look at Avalon. “Again.” He digs his claws into the tree over Avalon’s head. 

Avalon smiles internally as she pushes her knuckle hard into his skin again to stimulate the prostate gland, she now knows exists. She will make him cum for her. 

He fights with his body not to finish in her mouth. His hips rock back and forth trying not to gag Avalon. He’s so involved in the wet sensation of her mouth on his cock that he doesn’t notice the rumble of the trees behind them, the blind stumbling steps of a rabid, giant, red ogre, approaching with unnatural speed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am currently looking for a new co-author if anyone would be interested please let me know.


	29. Crossing Lines

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am looking for a co-author who can embody Sesshomaru. If interested please contact me either here or on twitter. https://twitter.com/nightbird755

Sesshomaru’s lost in pleasure and the scent of Avalon’s growing heat when a foreign scent finally hits his nose. His head snaps over his shoulder as he pushes Avalon off his cock, pulling his pants up quickly. He forces her down and covers her body with his own as the ogre slashes into his back, ripping his skin. He flies off the ground, tying his hakama one handed and attacks the red ogre. He flicks it in the face with his whip, seeing no effect. The ogre only blinks and slaps at the whip. He strengthens the whip and tries to slice into the neck, only for the hide to resist the blow. ‘What is this?’ 

He lunges at the head with his claws outstretched. The ogre swings at him with unnatural speed, nearly hitting him. He dodges a blow to his stomach, another to his back and twists around the limbs trying to grab him. He flies up again and slams his hand into the neck, feeling resistance that shouldn’t be there. 

Avalon looks up at what is happening and gets into a fighting stance, summoning her sword. ‘Why is he having such difficulty?’ She calls, “Sandasutoraiku!” The purple light swirls around her blade as she forces more reiki into the attack. She swings her sword down. The bolt of purple light extends along the ground before shooting up and wrapping around the ogre, completely avoiding Sesshomaru. The skin sizzles and melts but the ogre roars and charges at Avalon without it’s skin. “Kuso!” Avalon barely dodges the charge, rolling to the side. 

“Stay back!” Sesshomaru yells, charging the ogre again. He puts more energy into the whip, sending it flying around the ogres waist and tugging fiercely, cutting into the ogres flesh. He flies full force into the back of the ogre, releasing the whip and slamming his hand into the chest cavity reaching for the heart, lacing it with dokkasu. His arm can’t make it in further than his wrist before the ogre swirls around, batting him off. He grunts as the hand hits his face, sending him flying backwards, but then he flips and lands on his feet snarling. ‘What is this? Ogres don’t have this strength.’ He charges again, trying to go for the head but the ogre aims at his face, he flies down and then up and sideways. “Stay back, Onaga!” 

Avalon’s face scrunches up in concentration while keeping herself out of the way. ‘This isn’t right. Why?’ “Let me help!” she says, over the fighting youkai. 

Sesshomaru grits his teeth. ‘She is strong.’ He flies at Avalon, grabbing her around the waist, making them both dodge hits from the ogre, until he gets around the back and drops Avalon on the ogre’s shoulder. “Go for the head!” 

Avalon tries plunging the sword into the orges neck, forcing Reiki into the blade. The flesh sizzles as the orge’s arms try to grab at her. She stays low, putting a purple barrier around herself as she keeps forcing the blade into the orge’s flesh. ‘This shouldn’t be so difficult.’ She gets the blade halfway in and yanks it out, leaping across the ogres chest, cutting his throat open and nearly taking its head. The sword sticks in the flesh as Avalon dangles from the blade gritting her teeth. She forces more reiki into the blade. The ogre falls to its knees, grasping at its bleeding throat. The sword finally dislodges and she prepares to land on the ground. 

Sesshomaru catches Avalon, landing in front of the ogre, but the hide regenerates and the neck wound closes. The ogre stands up again, roaring at them, and charges. Sesshomaru senses something pulling at his yoki. He dodges a hand that tries to rip Avalon out of his arm and then the other hand that swipes at their backs. “What would give an ogre this strength?” he asks Avalon. “This is not its own power. Ogres are not this strong.” 

“No, they are not. I've taken out a few myself.” Avalon presses her lips together as a realization dawns on her “A jewel shard,” she whispers. 

“I sense darkness.” Sesshomaru twists missing the arms again. He lands on the forest floor, using his body to shield Avalon. “Barrier, now.” 

Avalon erects a powerful barrier around her and Sesshomaru. “Can you sense where it is?” 

“No. Only that it calls to this Sesshomaru. I have no need for it. Can you see it?” 

“If I could, I would have said something sooner,” she says sarcastically. “But let me try something.” Avalon closes her eyes as the orge pounds against the barrier. The burning flesh adds a disgusting scent to the air. Avalon tries blocking out the noise and the vibrations and the smell, concentrating on the auras around her. She can sense Sesshomaru’s and her own. She senses the ogre’s and notices that the energy isn’t even. Her eyes snap open looking at the remnants of the aura. “His right leg is weird. The aura is wrong. I don’t know if the jewel shard is there or not, but it would be my guess.” 

‘My claws aren’t working.’ “Lower the barrier.” Sesshomaru’s eyes enlarge and bleed red. 

Avalon nods. “Be careful.” She lowers the barrier and jumps out of the way of the ogre’s fists. 

“Erect the barrier when I leave.” Sesshomaru’s face breaks into a smile as he leaps into the air. His body changes from humanoid to fur and muscles. He lands snarling in front of the ogre, ruff blowing in the wind. 

Avalon’s barrier goes back up, protecting herself. She bites her bottom lip worrying about him.

‘Stay back, Onaga. Let this Sesshomaru end this.’ He lunges at the ogre, better able to block blows like this. His own skin is hardened, making it difficult for the ogre to slash him with his claws. The ogre kicks Sesshomaru’s side, making his ribs creak. Sesshomaru roars and rips the leg off the body, then shreds it. He slams his paw down on the chest and then breaks the neck off the ogre. Sesshomaru motions Avalon with his head to come forward and find the jewel, while he lets slow amounts of dokkasu drop on the ogre's head to keep it at bay. 

Avalon’s barrier drops and she dashes forward. She calls, “Sandasutoraiku.” The purple reiki flares along her blade into the pile of flesh that was the right leg, disintegrating it, leaving a deep purple splinter behind. Avalon picks up the shard in her hand wondering if she could purify it. 

Sesshomaru changes back to his human form, landing next to Avalon. “The power of the Shikon no Tama.” His hankimono and hanjuban are open revealing his abs, but blood drops down his back, where he took the first blow to protect Avalon. 

Avalon nods her head. The jewel slowly turns pink in her hand. Avalon’s brow furrows. ‘I wouldn’t think I could purify it.’ She looks over at Sesshomaru and sees the red blooming along his clothing and her eyes widen. “How badly are you hurt?” she asks with desperation. She holds the shard in one hand, while the other pulls at his clothing to check him. 

Sesshomaru brushes her off. “It will heal. I do not feel pain. We go.” He walks in Jaken’s direction, then stops and turns around. “Cover beurorestos.” He pinches her nipple and keeps going. 

Avalon rolls her eyes, runs back to where they were and grabs the sports bra she tossed and puts it on, then pulls her kimono on properly. She gathers the soaked clothing and follows after him. “Please, let me check your wound?” 

“It will heal. We go.” He ignores her concern. ‘A little too much to the right.’ He replays the battle in his mind. He had dodged right with the first blow to protect Avalon and his stump, but it was an unnecessary move. He would learn quickly to adapt and be a better warrior because of it. 

“And where are we going in such a rush that I can’t check you, but we have time for me to pleasure you?” she says, putting her hand on her hip. 

“To find Naraku, or the child.” He keeps his pace, ignoring the slight sting in his back. She was a distraction and his back would heal. 

“And you smell Naraku? Or even know where to look for Rin?” 

“Neither. Which is why we hunt.” 

Avalon follows him, shaking her head. She holds the shard in her hand. “With this, Naraku will come looking for us eventually.” 

“I require a weapon,” he says, meeting Jaken. “Go to Totosai and tell him to forge one for this Sesshomaru,” he tells the imp. “I cannot wait for Bakusaiga.” 

“You are right. You need a weapon but Totosai won’t forge one for you,” she says, following Sesshomaru through the forest looking at the trees and the sky. 

‘Totosai won’t forge one?’ He growls under his breath. “More secrets?” 

“Hmm? What do you mean? I just told you he won’t forge one for you.” 

“You knew this the entire time and said nothing. It doesn’t matter, there is one that can.” 

“It didn’t cross my mind until you told Jaken to go to him. I figured I’d save you the time. In fact, you do get a sword forged by a demon known as….ummm...crap what is his name. He was Totosai’s pupil. Do you know the one I’m talking about?” 

“It didn’t cross your mind?” He turns on her, purposely letting his yoki rise up in threat. “What else has not crossed your mind?” 

“I don’t know. It hasn’t crossed my mind,” she says, defiantly. 

“If you cannot think far enough ahead to tell this Sesshomaru what doesn’t cross your mind, what purpose do you serve by my side? Other than a distraction?” 

Avalon shrinks back, hurt by his words. “As an advanced warning! Saving you time and effort! Keeping Jaken from running useless errands!” she screams at him with tears in her eyes. 

“Do not expect these tears to sway my heart,” he speaks coldly and slowly. “So you can warn me that I will lose my arm and fail? So that you can attack me when I am at my weakest? You have not saved this Sesshomaru time or effort!” 

“YOU LEFT ME!” she screams in rage.

“Because you tried to control this Sesshomaru!” 

Jaken slinks back from both of them, hiding behind the dragon. 

“I...I never wanted to control you. I just wanted your help. I wanted to end Naraku sooner than later and I knew if you could manifest your sword, his death would be that much sooner. I was wrong and now I am trying my best to make up for it. Shit got messed up. And hey, you wanting a sword forged by Totosai wasn’t on the top of my mind. Sorry, I will try to read your mind and know exactly what you want me to tell you. Kuso, it didn’t work,” she says seething. 

Sesshomaru’s hand comes up and smacks down against her cheek, hard enough to move her face but not nearly as hard as he could have hit her. He raises a daring eyebrow at her, challenging her to say more. ‘Disrespectful, dishonorable female.’ 

Avalon cradles her cheek more shocked he stuck her, than any pain it caused her. She turns her back on him walking a few steps before falling on her knees crying. Her body convulses as she starts hyperventilating, unable to catch her breath. She starts feeling faint until she passes out falling forward on the ground. 

Sesshomaru shakes his head, annoyed. He picks her up and throws her stomach down over the dragon and keeps walking. “Jaken!” he yells at the imp who has shrunk behind a rock. “We’re leaving.” 

Avalon wakes a few hours later as tears return to her eyes she cries softly against the dragon's back. 

Sesshomaru ignores the tears as he keeps moving through the forest searching for Naraku’s scent. It would take time to find him. It didn’t matter how long. 

His eyes slide back to see Avalon disheveled and looking pathetic. He’s only keeping her with him now because of her knowledge of the future. Without it, there was no need for her to follow him. He would move faster alone. 

Avalon rubs her eyes, not even looking at Sesshomaru. Her tears eventually dry but her pain doesn’t fade. ‘How could he?’ 

They keep searching until night comes and the moonrises. Sesshomaru keeps his distance from Avalon, refusing to speak to her or make eye contact. 

Avalon refuses to speak to Sesshomaru even as her stomach growls and snarls in hunger. She would not ask for help, too stubborn and hurt to care. 

As the night wears on, Sesshomaru stops them, knowing it’s likely Avalon needs to relieve herself and is most likely hungry. He walks past her and says, “Do as you please.” Then goes into the forest in search of something to hunt. 

Avalon grits her teeth and slides off the dragon. “Jaken-sama, can you find me something to eat?” she asks, sounding like a broken woman. She continues walking in the other direction to relieve herself. She had needed to for some time but she wouldn’t ask to stop. 

Jaken grumbles but goes in search of something to feed Avalon, collecting berries and nuts in the forest as well as some fruit from a tree. 

Avalon comes back to the dragon and sits down waiting for Jaken to return. After he comes back she thanks him and eats the food falling back asleep.

A few days pass of Avalon and Sesshomaru refusing to acknowledge each other. Avalon barely ate and drank, so she didn’t need to go very often and she would when the opportunity arose. Soon Avalon starts feeling a yearning to connect to Sesshomaru. She wills her arousal away, pushing it down each time but soon it becomes too much for her to ignore and her eyes keep looking to Sesshomaru hungrily. 

He feels his own arousal returning as he walks ahead of her, but forces himself to ignore it. ‘I am not an animal,’ he tries to convince himself, but he misses the feel of her body against his and his nights and days of searching have come up empty. 

Avalon walks closer behind him but keeps herself away, even as her eyes keep flicking to his back. It soon becomes unbearable to walk and she decides perhaps riding the dragon would work better. She hops up and as soon as her crotch makes contact with the saddle she hisses unintentionally. 

‘Live with your arousal,’ Sesshomaru thinks to himself as the sunsets and night comes again. He stops for them to make camp and walks off without a word to find a body of water. Miles away he finds a shallow lake and begins stripping himself of his clothing, to cool his desire in the waters. 

Avalon looks about. She flares out reiki and finds no youkai other than the dragon and Jaken around. “Stay. Don’t follow me,” she warns Jaken. ‘If I must I will.’ 

She slinks off farther from camp and finds a spot to lay down. She pulls her soaked underwear off and plunges a finger into herself, pumping and rubbing her clit in circles, moving faster and faster till she feels release and a moment of clarity before the heat and desire returns just as strongly. “FUCK!” she screams in frustration. “REALLY! I CAN'T EVEN FIND RELEASE BY MASTERBATING! YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE! YOU FUCKING HIT ME AGAIN AND I’LL CUT YOUR FUCKING OTHER ARM OFF!” she screams in English, then gathers her panties, putting them back on and stomping back to camp. 

Sesshomaru hears her yelling angrily from the water and chuckles to himself as he lays down on the banks, letting the water lap across his body, staring forlornly at his aroused shaft. This fighting was not helping. But she had no respect, no honor and should know better than to speak to him like that in front of Jaken. He stays by the lake, denying himself, despite how it makes it feel like his skin is crawling. 

Avalon falls down against the dragon once she gets back to camp and wraps her arms around her knees, sulking in misery. 

As the night continues, Sesshomaru decides to hunt. He slaughters a boar and eats it alone and then a shika and finishes the top half. The bottom half, he carries back to camp and throws at Jaken. “Cook this,” he commands him and then sits on the other side of camp, away from Avalon. 

Avalon keeps glancing up from between her legs at Sesshomaru. ‘I won’t ask. I rather die,’ she resolves. She tries focusing on the deer being cooked but her eyes keep going back to  _ him _ . Avalon takes a bo-shirkin and she suddenly stabs it in her thigh, digging the needle in causing pain hoping to distract her aroused mind. She focuses on the pain as blood blooms along her thigh. 

Sesshomaru’s head snaps up at the scent of her blood and he starts licking his lips but then he sees her with a needle in her leg and rolls his eyes, turning so she can’t see him cover his nose with his hand. ‘Childish and immature and she wonders why she cannot rule by my side.’ 

The pain distracts her for only a moment, even as she digs the needle around ripping at her flesh before her mind brings her back to him. She pulls the needle from her leg disgusted that she can’t distract herself. She tosses the bloody needle down at the side of Sesshomaru, before stomping away from camp. ‘I need a better distraction!’ The blood leaves a trail behind. She flares her reiki, looking for a fight. 

She soon senses a smaller youkai and follows her senses, walking till she finds a snake like beast with a human head. The creature was yellow and blue similar to Sessshomaru’s obi. Avalon smiles viciously as she pulls a bo-shuriken from her sleeve and strikes the creature through the tail. It hisses and turns on her, spitting acid at her from its mouth. Avalon dodges most of it but some gets on her skin and it sizzles. She smirks at the pain. It helped. She summons her sword and rushes forward striking at the body, not to kill but to mame. She didn’t want the fight to end so soon. She hacks chunks out of the youkai’s body until it stops trying to attack her. Avalon sneers when the creature can no longer move.

“Pitiful.” She decapitates it, putting it out of its misery. 

Sesshomaru watches her from the trees, seeing the wound, almost allowing himself to break and then walks away back to camp. It would only be a matter of time before neither one of them could resist any longer. ‘Just fall asleep,’ he begs in his mind. 

Avalon comes back to camp with her shoulders slumped. It worked while she was fighting but now that her mind was unoccupied she was back to wanting Sesshomaru so bad and her core was soaked with her nectar. 

He can smell it and he wants her. He needs her. He gets up again, going back to the lake to avoid how aroused he feels. ‘This is ridiculous,’ he tells himself as he sits back down by the lake. ‘This is enough. I will bed Avalon, simply to satiate my desire. I said I would not take another for an heir.’ The thought occurs to him, he could find another to relieve the pressure he feels. 

Avalon digs into her bag pulling the shard from it. She stares at the jewel as she thinks and frowns. ‘Why am I stuck with this bond anyway?’ Avalon puts her elbow on her knee and rests her chin on her hand. She blows a stray strand of hair out of her face. ‘It’s just yoki, does that mean I can purify it?’ Her lips curl up. ‘If I can break this bond, I won’t have to deal with being his mate and I could maybe find love.’ Avalon watches the shard change color as her mood fluctuates. ‘Cool! Real mood ring.’ She laughs out loud. 

Jaken gets bored watching Avalon pout and goes in search of Sesshomaru, instead of staying at the camp as he was told. 

Her ringing laugh catches the attention of several ronin who are half a mile away. One who looked grizzly, smirks. “You hear that boys?” The other six look at him and nod their heads. He stands dressed in tattered armor. “Shall we have ourselves a good time tonight?”

The other men laugh as they all rise and start quietly stalking towards the sound of the female laugh. 

#####  Avalon puts the shard back into her bag glumly. ‘I shouldn’t taint it,’ she scolds herself. “Let’s see if I can break this bond,” Avalon annonces, rubbing her hands together. She places the soles of her feet together and straightens her back. She puts her palms together, closing her eyes and concentrates on flooding her body with reiki, seeking out any yoki within her, purifying it as she goes. As more yoki is purified, her sexual desires lessen. Her lips curl up, relief flooding her mind from the reprieve. Her head snaps to the left when she hears footsteps of several people. She grabs the bag and hides it behind a tree and stands up walking towards the fire. Her shoulders are slack and she seems to be at ease. 

Sesshomaru follows his nose through the forest searching for a female inu-youkai. He smells one off in the distance. ‘Sakura,’ he rolls his eyes. She would not give him what he wanted but it would be better than this torment. He starts walking up a hill of grass, towards her scent. He will dine on her tonight and feel relief at least somewhat, but then he stumbles on the hill, falling to his knees, grabbing his chest, growling in pain. ‘What is this?’ He starts panting as his chest both burns and tightens. He feels like yoki is being sucked from his body, fleeing from him. His fingers tremble, his mind blazes and blurs. ‘What is this?’ 

As the yoki leaves his body, it’s as if his sanity follows it. His eyes cover in red as he convulses on the ground, gripping his heart until he draws his own blood. His howls fill the night air as if rabid wolves have surrounded the area. 

One of the men pushes through the trees and sees the young woman wearing a fine kimono and long luxurious hair. ‘A noble?’ The man scans the area and sees no one guarding her. A wicked smile breaks across his face. He pushes out and approaches her with the intent to rape and capture her for a ransome. “Good evening, Milady.” He bows respectfully to her. “If you come with us willingly, you won’t be harmed.” The leader who is dressed in black armor and a top knot comes forward. He’s flanked by six other men, who are just as tall and burly. 

Avalon turns and covers her mouth as if shocked to see them. “I am afraid I must refuse.” She gets into a fighting stance. “And if you continue in your pursuit of me, you will all perish.” Avalon charges her limbs with reiki giving herself strength and speed. 

“As if we care darling. You’re coming with us!” They surround her, reaching for her arms and legs. 

Avalon waits until they are closing in on her before she lets herself drop, sweeping her leg out in a blur, knocking all the men down. She flips over the group of men, getting herself out of the center of them. She pulls a bo-shuriken, (throwing needle) and tosses it into the leader’s neck, hitting his carotid artery. She pulls another bo-shuriken out and aims for another man's neck but he moves and it hits the ground. She backs up a bit to give herself more room. She grabs her third bo-shuriken and holds it ready to strike the next one, who tries to approach her. “Leave before you die!” she warns in a deadly tone. 

One comes in behind her, slamming the back of an axe into her head, sending her onto the ground, while two more come and pin her wrists down against the forest floor. The other two grab her legs, while the head wound bleeds. 

Avalon feels groggy but she can feel them pinning her down. She forces more reiki into her arms and twists her wrists, freeing her arms. She slams her head into one of the men holding her legs. 

The man stumbles back, releasing her left leg. She rolls and back kicks the man holding her right leg at the base of his neck with reiki coursing through her muscles. She can hear the snap of his neck from the blow as he falls off to the side. The wound heals quickly and her mind becomes clear. She flips up, striking at one of the men in front of her, hitting him in the chest and sending him stumbling back into the ground with a cracking of his ribs. She spins around, eyes wild, ready to kill whoever dares to touch her. The Murasaki no Raikō sword appears in her hand out of thin air. She swings it around her, cutting one of the men in the abdomen.

One rises up, striking her in the back of the head with the pummel of his sword. Avalon stumbles forward as her head gushes blood. The one that struck her grabs her arms and locks them behind her back while the others look on with lust. 

“She’s got spunk,” one says.

“We were only going to ransom you, but you know, I think we will just have our fill of you and leave you to die,” another pipes up.

The others laugh in agreement. “I think it’s for the best. She’ll be too hard to keep alive,” one says as he grabs the back of her head and crashes his lips into hers and bites her bottom lip drawing blood. He licks his lips. “So sweet.”

Avalon’s mind is so fuzzy and she is trying to clear her head when she feels hands on her thighs pushing up her kimono. “NO! HELP!” she screams.

“Scream all you want princess no one can hear you,” the man jeers.

“SESSHOMARU! SESSHOMARUUUUUU!” she screams desperately for his help. 

The pain has taken over his mind. He smells blood, female blood, delicate blood and wants it, to taste it, to drink it, to fill his mouth with it and devour it. He hears someone screaming his name, but it doesn’t matter, it’s as if he’s drunk with bloodlust. His body luminesces, flashing to the yelling and screaming. He lands, finding four men holding down a female, one is between her legs. They smell of musk, copper and sweat. He wonders how they will taste. He licks his fangs, until his own tongue bleeds, crimson drips down his chin. His eyes are viciously vermillion as a low growl emits from his throat. 

Avalon’s mouth drops open, seeing Sesshomaru looking so dangerous, so feral. His stripes are jagged and filling his cheeks. His fangs and teeth are elongated and his hair seems to fly up as if a breeze were under him. ‘He looks like he is about to change.’ She starts struggling more valiantly against the ones holding her down. 

The ronin release her and take on a defensive posture forgetting their quarry in favor of saving their necks. Avalon stays low and spider crawls away slowly. She doesn’t want to draw his attention. As she crawls backwards, her hand dips into a pool of blood from one of the men she had killed and she slips falling on her back before scrambling back up and hiding behind a tree. Her body is covered in goosebumps. Her hairs stand on end. She peers out, watching as Sesshomaru stalks forwards to the men who hold their swords at the ready. 

His head hangs slightly to the side deciding which one to take first. His whips flashes out of his palm, piercing through legs and arms, sparing vital areas that would make death fast. He leaps onto the first one as he screams, falling to the forest floor. His lips come together in a low snarl as his claws extends into the ronin’s chest, cutting away his flesh, making the daiyoukai chuckle with glee. 

The man screams in fear and pain. The two men who can still run, take off screaming. The one whose legs were injured, starts crawling on his arms, dragging his body towards Avalon. 

“Stay away from me!” Avalon hisses. 

“Help me,” the man pleads as he crawls closer to Avalon. She backs away from him. His blood is leaving a trail right to her. 

“No,” she says, when her back hits a wall. “Fuck!” 

The man finally reaches her grabbing her leg clinging to her. “Save me.” 

Sesshomaru finishes skinning the first one, licking the blood off his fingers, then hacks his head off, throwing his body aside. He rises and stalks towards Avalon and the remaining Ronin. His mind is a blur of passion, greed, anger and hunger. The blood was not sweet enough, not the delicate female he had scented before. He yanks the ronin off Avalon by the foot, throwing him on the ground belly up, slicing through his midsection in an agonizingly slow line. When the stomach begins to bubble and spew blood he holds the man up by the ankle, so it pours down his body, smiling sadistically. 

Avalon watches in shock as she scoots along the rock face backing away from him. ‘Oh god, what is wrong with him?’ Once she is a bit further away, she pushes reiki into her legs and runs as fast as she can away from Sesshomaru and the bloody scene. 

This blood isn’t what he wants. He lets the man drop. He rips the liver from the ronin’s body, tasting the flesh and casts it aside. ‘Not sweet enough. Where did you go?’ He chases after the scent of the fleeing female and lands in front of her, mouth open and tongue flicking across his teeth. He wants her, he will have her. 

Avalon stops herself just short of colliding with him as a scream of fear erupts from her throat. She backs away from him while looking at his chest, not wanting to challenge him by looking in his eyes. She says gently, “Sesshomaru?” 

The dark chuckle returns. He grabs her by the neck, forcing her against a rock face, sniffing her neck. He drags his top fangs down her shoulder, tearing into her skin, licking the blood. 

Avalon holds back the scream of pain. “Please stop. I’m sorry,” she sobs out as she pushes against his chest. 

He clamps down on her wrist, shaking his head back and forth, tearing her skin down to the bone, then forces his body against hers, emitting low, sensuous growls. There was something familiar about her, something primal. His nose presses against her cheek as his teeth threaten to devour her. 


	30. Kaze no Kizu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still looking for a new co-author. I am running out of chapters soon there will be no more.

Avalon can’t help but gasp in pain as he tears her wrist apart. “Sesshomaru please,” she says in a whisper as tears slide down her cheeks, falling onto his nose and along his teeth. “Please, don’t do this.” 

His mind tells him to dominate her, to own her. He forces her onto her knees, pushing her head into the ground, snarling over her back as he forces himself between her feet. 

‘What can I do?’ her mind races as she knows what he intends to do. She starts doing the only thing that has calmed him in the past, other than her scent and starts singing a slow and calming song. “ _ Playground school bell rings again. Rain clouds come to play again.” _ She tries to sing the next lyrics between cries.  _ “Has no one told you she's not breathing?”  _

Seconds, for just seconds he can hear her voice, smell the tears and knows he should stop. Blood pounds in his ears but then his primal nature takes over again. He slashes through her underwear and the back of the kimono, shaking as if trying to gain control of himself. A part of him knows she is his, but something is missing between them. 

Avalon grits her teeth, when he tears her clothing away. She tries to continue her song, praying it would work, _ “Hello, I'm your mind, giving you someone to talk to. Hello. If I smile and don't believe. Soon I know I'll wake from this dream.” _ She takes a deep breath trying to swallow the tears, so she can continue to sing. 

His bottom lip trembles, then his hand. ‘What am I doing?’ He can see Avalon beneath him, but he’s so hard, so aroused and something feels so wrong inside of him and inside of her. Her voice washes over him like a cold stream, her internal plea, begging him to stop. He grips her shoulder fighting an internal battle between himself and what his body needs, until his claws dig into her skin drawing blood. 

Avalon groans in pain as his claws sink into her flesh, she takes another breath.  _ “Don't try to fix me, I'm not broken, Hello, I'm the lie living for you so you can hide, Don't cry. _ ” 

Sesshomaru’s hakama drop. His desire is so strong he can taste it on his lips and feel it on every millimeter of his skin. He inches forward, his shaft rubs into her slit. “Give me a child,” he threatens, resting against her opening. 

Avalon’s body shakes with fear and her eyes fill with tears. He is pressed against her and she knows he is going to take her against her will. “Please don't do this.”

Salt and tears pierce his senses. His  _ she  _ isn’t supposed to cry when he takes her. His hand begins to tremor on her shoulder and he jackknifes over her, his nose falling into her back as he trembles behind her, fighting to stop himself from penetrating Avalon. “S-s-sing.” 

Avalon realizes she is reaching him and sings. “ _ Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping. _ ” She takes another breath. “ _ Hello, I'm still here.” _

He pulls her back, sitting on his haunches, holding Avalon protectively over the shoulders against his chest, struggling to get enough air in. It hurt, he ached with the need to release himself inside of her. He searches for the part of him that is supposed to be connected to her and can’t sense it, making his anger flare. “You t-t-took it...give it back!” He pushes her onto her back, holding her down by the shoulder, forcing her legs apart with his knee. 

“W-w-w...hh..at?” Her lip trembles in fear. 

His head bobs up and down as he swallows, blinking, trying to regain control. “N-n-not mine. N-n-not mine.” 

“Not mine?” she asks, confused. 

His pulse sounds in his ears. His body begs for release. “N-n-not mine. T-t-take it back.” His knees inch closer into her thighs, widening her hips. “Take it back.” 

“Our bond?” she asks, finally wondering if this was what he meant. 

“Not mine. Not mine. Not mine.” He drags his tongue up her neck, tracing her lips, repeating the same words over and over without end. 

Avalon gasps. She had been purifying the yoki before. ‘Is this the result?’ She hesitantly presses her lips to his, not sure if it was the right move or not. 

He tastes her lips, opening his mouth, curling his tongue around her teeth. Then he feels it pricking at his senses from the kiss, slowly growing within her. “More.” His mouth comes down more forcefully. 

Avalon allows him the access he wants kissing back with equal fierceness. ‘I hope I don’t regret this.’ 

The kissing calms him but he needs more. The need to be with her never left him, despite what Avalon did to herself. His lips dance in tandem with hers as his body finally falls against hers and he dry thrusts into her crotch. ‘I will not force you.’ He cups her chin, more firmly than he wants, but his control is so fragile. “More,” he snarls out. 

Avalon keeps kissing him. Her hand delves into his hair pulling his face to hers. Her other hand runs along his right arm. 

A feral growl emits from his lips and he shoves Avalon away from him backing into a cleft in the rock face. He rakes his claws over his face, cutting into his skin, over and over. He shakes his head back and forth. ‘Not like this.’ 

Avalon approaches him slowly with her good arm outstretched. “Sesshomaru?” 

He continues muttering, “not mine,” over and over again. When his face drips with blood, his claws move to his chest, raking lines into his skin. 

Avalon rushes forward grabbing his arm, trying to stop him from clawing himself. “Stop. I'm not going anywhere,” she says soothingly. 

His light is blossoming inside of Avalon, but his mind doesn’t stop flooding him with the primal need to take her. He falls on her neck, staining her skin with his blood. His forearm forces her body against his. He’s desperate now for what was controllable before and guilt washes through him for what he nearly did to her. He shakes his head into her neck, pushing the material off her bleeding shoulder and sucks forcefully on the wounds he inflicted. 

Avalon hisses in pain but her other arm wraps around him to comfort him. 

The taste of her blood in Sesshomaru’s mouth brings him a modicum of comfort. He laps at the lines on her neck, slithering the tip of his tongue in between the broken skin. His eyes slowly change from red back to white and gold but he still can’t speak. 

Avalon grits her teeth at the pain. “I am here,” she says softly. 

He drags his nose down to the folds of cloth covering her heart and pulls them down, exposing her breast. His mouth opens over the flesh and then his nose inhales deeply, fear hitting him the strongest. ‘I need release. I can’t ask.’ So he clings to her, alternating between inhaling the scent of her breast and licking her skin. ‘What happened?’ 

Avalon keeps saying in a whisper, “I’m here,” over and over to him. ‘What am I going to do?’ 

The sound of blood boiling in his ears dies down enough for him to bring her hand down to his shaft. Instinctively he knew he needed her, worse than before, whatever it was that had crippled him on the hill. He sees the burn of acid from the demon she fought and moves his lips onto the tattered skin, licking slowly, to speed its healing as if apologizing and begging at the same time. 

Avalon’s hand remains still unmoving and unresponsive against his shaft. She can't bring herself to pleasure him after everything he did to her. Not after he slapped her and nearly raped her. 

‘Blood. I still smell blood.’ He lifts the wrist that has been injured, pushes the material back and sucks gently on the thick broken pieces of skin to sooth her ache. His tongue flicks against the bones, up the pink muscles. When he finishes, he nuzzles his nose into her neck, rocking back and forth as if he is comforting Avalon.

Avalon’s lip trembles as tears pour from her eyes. “I can't,” she finally whispers. 

“I can’t,” he echoes her, still struggling with the cyclone in his mind. “Leave. Leave me.” But he can’t let go. 

“I should,” she says, trying not to move away from him. “You promised not to hurt me,” she whispers as her head falls on his shoulder. 

His fingers tremble. His mind tries to clear. It’s as if he comes up for air long enough to speak. “Leave.” He brings her fingers to wrap around his shaft again. “I can’t...it’s too strong. Leave before--” He moves away from her, folding his knees into his face and covers his head. ‘Why does it control this Sesshomaru like this?’ 

Avalon wars with herself. She can't do this but she wants to help him. She stands in place, unsure what to do. “Sesshomaru?” she says, leaning down by him.

He gasps at how her scent draws him in and stumbles away from her, turning his back as he pulls his knees against his eyes again. ‘Leave Onaga...before I become one more who takes you against your will.’ He rocks back and forth. Whatever robbed her body of his yoki has made the yearnings worse than in the past. 

Avalon gets on her knees behind him touching his shoulder gently. “What can I do?” she asks softly. 

He shakes his head. ‘What happened?’ His sanity is holding on by a thread. ‘Why is it so strong?’ He starts muttering the thoughts in his head over and over, not understanding what happened or what robbed him of his control and has reduced him to this. 

Avalon bites her bottom lip ‘Was this because I tried to purify the bond?’ “I...think...it was me,” she says ashamed. 

“What?” His head snaps up but his body doesn’t stop shaking. 

“I...uh...um...tried to purify the yoki inside me,” she says sheepishly. 

“Baka,” he whispers, putting his head back into his knees. “I should hate you.” He closes his eyes and attempts to focus on the details between his feet. The green of the grass, the way it scrapes against his shoes. The ladybug whose speckled back lands on a tiny yellow flower. He needs and his body isn’t listening to him. 

Avalon grits her teeth and backs away from him. Her own tears blossoming. “You don’t want to be bonded to me anyway,” she says bitterly, running away from him. 

“I don’t,” he mutters, trying to force his body to stop burning and aching. He listens to her leave, refusing to follow, knowing that if he did, he would only take. ‘Is this the only way? Can it not be satisfied some other way?’ 

He stays in place, watching the leaves and grass bend against the wind. If he can focus, he won’t follow and that is all that matters. ‘Why isn’t there another way?’ 

Avalon runs into the woods and stops leaning against a tree. Bitter tears fall uncontrollably. ‘Why do I even try? Why do I even care?’ 

Avalon weeps for a while and finally her tears dry and she realizes he never followed her. ‘Is he protecting me?’ She slowly walks back to where he is, surprised to find him still huddled in on himself. “Sesshomaru?” she asks hesitantly. 

His eyes come out of his knees. He opens his eyes as if asking what she needs. He’s covered in sweat from head to toe with new cuts along his wrists and shoulders. 

Avalon leans down and places her hand on his shoulders gently where he is cut “What have you done to yourself?” she asks, concerned. ’Is this all to stop himself from harming me?’ 

He shakes his head, not sure how to respond or to express that it feels like a part of himself was sucked out of his chest and the wound still aches. 

Avalon finds new tears filling her eyes. “What can I do to help you?” she asks quietly. 

“I will not ask,” he stammers out. 

Avalon swallows thickly before leaning down and kissing his lips while moving her body to be in front of his. “You need me,” she replies sadly. 

He nods, putting his forehead in his palm. “There must be another way.” 

Avalon shakes her head while reaching for the strings of his armor. “Perhaps,” she responds, kissing him. 

He takes her hands off him, staring at her completely confused. “You want this?” 

Avalon bites the inside of her cheek. “You need this,” she replies. 

He nods again, knowing that’s the truth, but he can’t move from his place. He’s hard and his skin tingles and his mind is racing faster than he is used to. “Do not do this again. If I had known,” he grits his teeth, trying to catch his breath but he can’t continue speaking. 

She nods. “I know,” she says softly. ‘You have been protecting me from you.’ Her hands go to the straps of his armor again. 

This time he lets her, leaning forward and resting his forehead against her shoulder. Her scent is marred with the smell of the samurais who held her, musk and salt and fear. He kisses her neck softly. “Forgive this Sesshomaru.” 

Avalon doesn’t answer, tears roll down her cheeks. She pulls his armor off. “Lay down?” she questions quietly. 

He massages the back of her neck with his hand and shakes his head. “Something else,” he says again. “I need you but I cannot ask you for this.” 

“I am offering,” she replies, cupping the back of his head. 

“And if you get nothing from it? No release, then what is it? Sating an animal's lust?” He tastes her neck again. 

“You’re not an animal,” she says. “I care about you, Sesshomaru. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t be offering myself. Please, take what you need.” 

He smiles into her neck, pressing his nose against it and then kisses her lips, hand shaking against her shoulder. He lays on his back trying to catch his breath. 

Avalon gets up and pulls his hakama down. She positions herself above his shaft, taking him into herself. She closes her eyes as more tears fall. She starts rolling her hips mechanically, setting her mind on autopilot. It was still difficult for her to give this. As much as she cares for him he had just put her through so much.

Sesshomaru responds by gripping her hips, almost like the action is causing him pain, but before he can adjust to the feeling, it intensifies with the rocking of her hips. 

Hate would be easier and annoyance fills him that there isn’t some other way to connect with her. Yoki rises up as if filling a void, creating a vortex, a whirlpool to replace what was lost. His mouth drops open and he grips her hip tightly, pushing his hips to get where he needs. ‘Something else,’ his mind burns. There had to be another way. 

Avalon’s body moves with Sesshomaru’s. Though the situation was different and this was her choice, it was all too reminiscent of her time with Naraku. More tears slip down her cheeks as she considers that Sesshomaru had stopped himself. She was so grateful for that, but the whole experience was laced with so much pain, blood and death. ‘I should not have tried to purify the bond.’ She leans down kissing his lips. “I’m sorry,” she whispers against them.

He dips his tongue into her mouth, knees rising up slightly. He caresses her cheek, equal parts appalled with what he is doing and asking for forgiveness for what he did. He rocks harder, rolling deeper until he finishes and feels a small measure of relief that some of what was lost is replaced. 

Avalon feels his release and cries. Her body slumps and goes limp on top of him. Her arms curl around his shoulders. Her body trembles as she weeps bitterly. 

Sesshomaru shakes his head against her cheek, feeling somewhat more himself, but sullied by what just happened. He strokes her back and rubs her shoulders, staring at the darkened sky in disgust. 

“Th...i...s is...n’t rrr….ight,” the words stumble out through tears. She feels like she is mourning in a way but she doesn’t know what has died. 

He nods in agreement, sliding her off his body and sitting up. He palms his chest, just over his heart, where it’s still tender and feels like something is healing, but there is no injury. 

Avalon curls herself into a ball, wrapping her arms around her knees. The tears won’t stop and she feels like she is trying to keep herself from tearing apart. She cares for a man who could harm her one moment, but would protect her the next with his very life. It’s too much for her to bear right now. 

He watches her cry, feeling his heart clench. This isn’t the way things were meant to be between mates and he knew it. He reaches down and picks her up by the upper arm. “Get up, follow me.” 

Avalon rubs her face with her sleeve. She stands on weak legs and follows him. 

He leads her to the lake he had swam in before and removes his hakama, leaving his fundoshi on, then takes off his hankimono and hanjuban, hanging them on a tree. Setting the bag on the bank, he removes sobanso, a comb and a cloth. “Remove your kimono.” 

Avalon lowers her head and slips the tattered kimono off not wanting to meet his gaze. 

He takes her wrist and brings her into the water until it comes up to his knees and then pulls her down to sit. He sits behind her, setting the cloth on his knee and rubs the sobanso in it. He pushes her hair over her shoulder and rubs her back in steady circles, removing the flecks of dried blood from her shoulders and back. When he’s finished, he pulls her hair back over her shoulder and then begins cleaning her shoulders, her breasts and her stomach. He scoots back, gathering her hair to hang over his knee. “Did I hurt you anywhere else?” 

Avalon thinks of the wounds he inflicted on her and new tears fill her eyes. He didn’t hurt her anywhere else. He stopped himself from hurting her further and he stopped himself from taking her against her will and with those thoughts a small smile graces her lips. “No,” she says breathlessly. 

He breathes a sigh of relief. He smooths her hair out behind her back. “Lean back. Lay in my lap.” 

Avalon’s smile falters and disappears. She nods and reclines into his lap. 

He picks the sobanso up again and runs it into her hair, massaging her scalp, saying nothing. He smooths it around her temples and the top of her head and then slides his fingers in soothing motions along the base of her scalp. 

“What is this?” she asks quietly, with her eyes closed, tears just behind her lids. 

“What is what?” He begins cupping water and gently washing the soap off her scalp. 

She smiles sadly, shaking her head. ‘How do I ask what are we? What happened? Why was he the way he was when I purified the bond? Why did he stop himself? Why does he care about me? What is this?’ 

He finishes with her hair and then leans back in the water against his arm. She should be sleeping, at this point he wonders if she would be able to tonight. 

Avalon sits up and turns around looking at him but not wanting to look in his eyes. She feels a sense of shame. “Is this what our lives will be?” she finally asks. 

He lowers his gaze to meet hers. “No. After Naraku, you will find a home of your own.” 

Avalon lowers her head, tears trickle down her face dripping into the water causing ripples to form. “So it will be like this, we come together when necessary and that is all.” 

“Did you expect something else? I do not love you.” 

“Why did you stop?” she asks flatly. “You had the strength, the power. I couldn’t have stopped you. Why did you stop yourself? And no, I did not want you to take me against my will. I just want to understand why you stopped.” 

“You will give yourself freely,” he says, coldly. “Not like that.” 

“This isn’t how things should be,” she says sadly. “Sesshomaru, I don’t want to live a life where I only have sex. I want to have meaning behind it.” Her head drops down. She feels cold inside. 

“That is why you will find a life of your own when this is over. I cannot be what you want.” 

She shakes her head. “Will I be able to have a lover?” 

“No.” 

“Then my life may be filled with other things. But still, loveless and meaningless sex.” She wraps her arms around herself. 

Sesshomaru doesn’t answer. All of this was why he sought a way to break the bond. He gets up and leaves the water, picking up his hakama and putting them on, but only throws the hankimono and hanjuban over his shoulder. Jaken would need to fix them. 

Avalon sighs. “And there is no way to break the bond without one of us dieing?” she whispers. 

“No,” he answers shortly and then takes out of the washing bag a midnight blue kimono. He leaves it on a tree for Avalon and walks back to the camp. 

Avalon starts rocking in the water as the truth washes over her. Tears fall and her body feels like it is so tightly wound it will snap at any moment. She starts hyperventilating, but she grits her teeth and takes several deep shake breaths to calm herself. ‘This is my life. He cares for me but he will not love me and I will never have love.’ 

Avalon shakes her head slowly getting out of the water and letting herself dry before slipping on the new kimono Sesshomaru gave her. It was pretty, with intricate stars embroidered into the midnight blue material. She smiles sadly at the kimono thinking it’s missing the crescent moon. She slowly walks back to camp composing herself the best she can. This was never what she wanted. 

Sesshomaru exhales staring at the bodies around them. He grabs one by the ankle and drags it away into the bushes and then melts it and repeats the process until they are gone. He sits next to a tree, closing his eyes, attempting to understand how it was he could lose control. 

Avalon comes out wearing the new kimono. She tosses the destroyed kimono in the fire. ‘Forgive me, but I will never wear it again.’ She glances over at Sesshomaru. Her eyes glisten with tears. ‘You were right to want to break the bond. This was never the way things were supposed to be. And now I want you to love me so I don’t just have meaningless sex with you.’ Avalon sits by a tree by the fire. ‘Why did I never try to find love? I was so afraid of being attacked again, but fuck, I could have. Shawn was hot and sweet. He tried so hard. I still remember the poems he would write for me. ‘Avalon the lovely, hair of ebony eyes of sea, to be the dream of every thing, voice of an angel, songs of the harald to be with such a lovely queen.’’ Avalon sighs. ‘He really was something else, but I was so afraid. And now it’s too late. Avalon sings in a whisper,

_ “ _ _ But it's too late, too late, too late _

_ Too late, too late for love _

_ Well it’s too late, too late, it's too late, too late _

_ Too late for love, much too late for love” _

She shakes her head. “Well only one thing to do,” she whispers in English. ‘Make the best of what I have I suppose. What do I have? I’m alive. I will live as long as he lives.’ She glances over at Sesshomaru. ‘Maybe I can get back to my artwork.’ Avalon smiles softly. ‘I drew him didn’t I?’ She thinks back to when she drew the life size poster of Sesshomaru that she put on her door. She laughs bitterly. ‘Your an ass sometimes, but you did try to free me and for that I’m grateful.’ She lets her mind wander and her eyes start getting heavy. She lays on the ground and falls asleep.

Avalon finds herself running and being slammed into a rock face by a rabid Sesshomaru. His eyes are red and his stripes on his cheeks are jagged. His teeth are longer and his claws are extended. She struggles to get away from him. He tears at her flesh and forces her legs apart. She screws her eyes shut as he pushes himself into her and his claws sink into her back, crushing her into his body. 

Sesshomaru scents Avalon’s fear while she sleeps. Guilt his companion because he knows he is the cause. He should be angry with her for tampering with the bond, but he had tried to find a way to end it and doesn’t hold her at fault for trying. Granted the results were rather dismal and terrifying. He approaches the area where she fell asleep and leans over her body, touching his crescent moon against her forehead. ‘What did I do to you? And then to pressure you afterwards?’ 

“Let me in.” His yoki rises up. His senses enter hers, until he is in the forest and his mouth falls open at the sight. ‘I am a monster,’ he tells himself as his yoki melts the scenery and takes Avalon back to her room. He dresses her in clothes similar to what she had worn before and sets her on her bed, while he slinks back into the corner of the room. He wants to leave her, return to consciousness but he knows her mind will go back and haunt her, so he suffices to explore her room, trying to understand who she was before she was sent to him. 

She lays on the bed silently as tears trickle down her face. It was so horrible what happened to her. She couldn't move or speak. 

A part of Sesshomaru wonders what she needs and why her view of him is so skewed. A smirk crosses his face as he flips through a stack of hard, square things with strange silver circle discs inside. ‘What are these?’ He creates another version of himself, giving her control of the other Sesshomaru. He knew that she thought she knew him, his future, who she thought he would become and so the other Sesshomaru approaches her bed. 

Avalon glances at Sesshomaru and scrambles away from him, falling off the bed. “No!” 

“What’s wrong?” the other Sesshomaru asks her, climbing over the bed. “Avalon, what happened?” 

“You stay away!” she warns, quickly crawling to the far corner of the room. 

He doesn’t relent. He kneels down in front of her, pulling her face out of her knees. “What happened?” 

And then something so odd to the real Sesshomaru happens. Yoki rises in the room, almost like a feeling and floods into Avalon, sending waves of comfort. ‘What the hell is this?’ 

Avalon looks up at him, wrapping her arms around Sesshomaru and crying into the fur on his shoulder. “You hit me and then you...you took me,” she sobs against him. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have tried to get rid of our bond, but you hit me.” 

The pads of his fingers trace an odd mark on the juncture of her neck and the yoki rises again. “It was a mistake,” he whispers, kissing the bite mark.

‘Bite mark?’ The real Sesshomaru’s eyes roll into the back of his head and he starts palming his forehead. ‘Whipped.’ 

Avalon shakes her head. “Not a mistake. You meant it,” she says bitterly as more tears fall from her eyes. 

The real Sesshomaru closes his eyes. ‘If you would learn, it would be unnecessary.’ 

The fake Sesshomaru hugs her tightly, rubbing her back. “It won’t happen again.” 

Avalon cries “Please don’t hurt me again.” 

“Forgive me. It was a mistake. I will not strike you again,” the other Sesshomaru says with more tenderness than the real one has heard in his voice before. “Let me comfort you.” He lifts her off the floor and carries her into the bed, stripping down to his bottoms, so she can curl against his chest. “Rest in my arms, my love.” 

Avalon nods her head and she moves her body to be close to his. She strokes the stripes on his cheeks lovingly. Her tears start to dry. “I won’t touch the bond again.” 

The fake Sesshomaru nods his head and strokes her hair.

Sesshomaru gets nauseous observing the scene. ‘Where did she learn this? Why does that mark smell like this Sesshomaru? He’s so soft, it’s humiliating.’ 

Avalon brings her head up, kissing his lips gently, until it grows more passionate. 

The fake Sesshomaru returns the kiss with equal intensity.

Sesshomaru wants to pound his head with his fist. ‘This? This is what she thinks?’ He starts pacing the room, again wanting to remove his presence from her mind but decides to give her the night with this facade, this weak and whipped version of himself to comfort the hurt he had caused. He sits in the corner of the room as eventually the kissing becomes more passionate and their hands explore each other. 

The fake Sesshomaru regails Avalon of his great love for her. ‘If I have to watch this the entire night…I do not love you, I will not love you. You are beneath this Sesshomaru to love.’ 

Avalon looks into Sesshomaru’s eyes with hurt, realizing this isn’t right either, but she will enjoy her dream. She snuggles into his chest holding him tightly. ‘Your not real.’ she thinks sadly. 

The real Sesshomaru watches them and exhales sharply. He can hear her thoughts and she’s right, this Sesshomaru isn’t real and neither is whatever she expects him to be in real life. He lets her have her dream and stays in the corner. 

The rest of the dream she holds Sesshomaru, kissing him softly as if she is saying farewell to her fantasy. Whatever she thought he was, she doesn’t know the real Sesshomaru well enough and she should get to know him. The real Sesshomaru. 

Sesshomaru holds Avalon until the sun begins to rise and he can feel its heat on his skin. He releases his control over her dream and moves away from her body, giving her space. He’s oddly tired from monopolizing her dreams, from the surge of yoki from the night before, so he finds a space away from her in the sun and falls asleep against his mokomoko. 

Avalon wakes shortly after he leaves her. She glances around at the blood that still covers the ground and a chill goes up her spine. What could have happened? What did happen?

She wraps her arms around her body and rubs herself, trying to ward off the chill. She picks up a stick and pokes at the fire to get it to burn once again. She gathers wood and throws it in to burn. She goes to find food for herself while she waits for Sesshomaru to get up. Walking to Aun, she pulls a pot out from her bag and looks at the jewel shard in the pocket, reminding her it was about the time Sesshomaru showed Inuyasha the windscar. 

Her path leads into the woods to the lake. She digs in the sand and grit, finding clams. She smiles happily and digs several more out, placing them in the pot. Then she fills it with water and brings it to the fire to cook. Once the clams pop open and the meat is done, she dumps the water and lets them cool enough to eat. 

She wonders how to get an arm for Sesshomaru. Some of the ronin that attacked her escaped. ‘If I could convince him to hunt them down.’ Avalon finishes eating and waits for Sesshomaru to wake watching over him. 

Sesshomaru sleeps for most of the day until the hot afternoon sun begins to beat down on him, heating his skin. His eyes open lazily, blinking several times. Avalon is by the fire and Jaken is with Aun. He stands up and gets his fixed clothing from Jaken. After he dresses he calls over his shoulder, “We’re leaving.” 

Avalon’s eyes never left Sesshomaru. She pops up off the ground and runs over to him. “May I speak to you in private Sesshomaru-sama?” she asks hopefully. 

Sesshomaru nods his head to the side and walks into the woods. 

Avalon follows him, feeling jittery. She sees him standing by a tree and joins him. She pivots back and forth on her feet, biting her lip “You...uh...know how I’m from the future right? Well, you see I...uh...messed things up and ...well, I would really like your help putting things right.” 

“What do you want?” Sesshomaru replies exhausted with the play on words. 

“Okay, you see, right now, if I hadn’t been here, you would still want Tetsusaiga and Naraku would have come to you with an offer. You would have taken him up on it, because it would give you the chance to take hold of the sword and potentially kill Inuyasha. So I want that to happen, sort of. You see, when you take the offer, you end up showing Inuyasha the windscar and also plunging your hand through his stomach but that you could pass on. But I would really like you to show him the windscar, because he needs to learn the sword's potential. So would you please help me. It gives you the opportunity to beat the hell out of Inuyasha and you know, show him up. Show him how pathetic he is because he couldn’t figure the sword out.” 

Sesshomaru exhales deeply, thinking of what to do. The hanyou was so pathetic that he couldn’t figure out how to master the sword, but knowing this, it wouldn’t be beyond Sesshomaru to end Inuyasha’s life. He glances at Avalon in question. 

“Look I know you don’t like him and in fact you loathe him but he will be an ally so will his companions. It’s the sum of--”

“Enough,” Sesshomaru interrupts her. “I cannot touch the katana.” 

“But you can.” She smiles mischievously at him. “With a little help from the jewel shard. So how about it? No killing anyone and you get to go beat the crap out of him and also show him up. Please, please, please?” She puts her hands together, begging him. 

He raises his eyebrow again. ‘Does she think I will ask like a dog?’ 

“We will need a human arm.” she says thinking aloud “I prefer someone who deserves to die versus someone who is innocent so I thought we could hunt down the ronin that attacked me.” Avalon thinks to herself “So the deal is you use the shard to connect the human arm to you and with that you can wield the sword since it’s a human arm. So how about? Now you need to be wary of his companions. The Miko, Kagome. She can reverse Tetsusaiga's transformation and she can see the jewel shard so she will be aiming for your arm. Sesshomaru! It’s important,” she says, walking behind him as he walks away from her. “The houshi has a wind tunnel that can suck you in and you won’t come out. That’s it.” 

Sesshomaru stalks further into the forest. One had gotten away and bled out in the forest. He stops by the river where the samurai’s body hangs off a stone, half in the water and half out. He rips the arm off and hands it to Avalon. 

“Uh… Thanks,” she says, holding the arm as far away from her body as she can. “I guess I’ll get the shard,” she says, walking back to Aun. She drops the arm, feeling grossed out and grabs the shard from her bag, then bends down wincing as she shoves the shard into the arm. She holds it out to Sesshomaru. “Here.” 

Sesshomaru lowers the sleeve of his hankimono and fuses the arm to his body, testing the mobility of the limb. “Stay behind,” he dismisses her. 

“But Sesshomaru-sama, I want to help you,” she pleads. 

“This Sesshomaru’s doesn’t need your help. Jaken! Find an oni,” he hisses at the imp. 

Jaken looks at Sesshomaru nodding his head “Of course milord.”

“Please stay safe, I care about you. I want you to know that,” she says holding her hands behind her back. 

Sesshomaru scoffs and walks away following after Jaken. 

Avalon shakes her head ‘you really think I’m just going to stay here.’ she waits until his aura is out of range and then she walks to Aun.  “We are going to go see my friends and you guys will get special treats.” The dragons groan happily. “You know what Inuyasha smells like?” The dragon's heads nod. “That is where my friend is. Let’s go.” 

The dragon takes off flying into the sky, heading towards the scent of the hanyou. After several hours the dragon touches down in front of a large building that looks like the head village's house. 

Avalon gets off the dragon. “Alright. I need you to get out of here so no humans see you but I want you near, in case I need you, you can hear me call okay?” The dragon huffs and nods again taking flight, leaving Avalon behind standing in front of the building. ‘Now just to find them.’ Avalon walks along the side of the building 

Sesshomaru flies to the river where he knows ogres will be found in plenty. There is one that is nearly as tall as a mountain, bent over lapping at the water. He lands on it like an eagle, slamming the full force of his body into its back, sending it flying. Oni are stupid but easy to control. He flies up to the red face of the ogre and whips it until it shows submission and bows to him. He sits on it’s shoulder and slaps it again, pointing in the direction of Inuyasha's scent. He slaps the ogre in the face again for good measure, making it feel for the village. ‘She thinks I will help the hanyou. I will end him.’ 

Avalon finds a door and knocks on it. An older man comes to greet her.

“Can I help you miss?”

“Hai, I am looking for my friends. I believe they are here. One is a young man dressed in red with silver hair and dog ears. His companion is a young woman who wears odd clothing and a finely dressed monk.”

“Ah, hai. They are here. Please come in.”

“Arigato.” Avalon bows her head, then walks in, following the older man that is wearing a simple kisode and has a topknot on his head.

He leads her down a hall and stops at a door. He knocks and says, “I have brought your friend.” 

Avalon waits, wondering what their reactions will be. 

“She’s no friend.” Inuyasha rises quickly to block Avalon from entering. 

“Inuyasha!” Kagome scolds him.

“A beautiful woman!” Miroku shoves Inuyasha out of the way, grabbing her hands, mouth watering. 

Avalon looks at the monk holding her hands, knowing what he is going to ask. She rolls her eyes, looking past Miroku to Inuyasha and Kagome. “Hello Inuyasha, Kagome. Good to see you. Who are you?” She allows the monk to keep holding her hands, uncaring. ’If he tries to touch my ass, he will pay.’ 

“Miroku.” He steps close to her, until their bodies are nearly pressed together. “Are you married?”

Inuyasha taps Miroku’s shoulder. “She’s Sesshomaru whore.” 

“I AM NOT A WHORE!” Reiki flares out, creating an uncomfortable environment for youkai. ‘Sorry Shippo.’ She slides her hands out of the monk’s and onto her hips. 

“Inuyasha!” Kagome reprimands him. “Sit!” 

Inuyasha hits the ground cringing. “She-”

“Sit!”

“She!” 

“Sit!”

“Stop it!” Inuyasha yells.

“Gomen.” Kagome tries to smile awkwardly at Avalon. “The last time I saw you, he tossed you onto the dragon and left. Are you okay? What is that?” Kagome stares off into the distance. 

“Crap! I came here to warn you that Sesshomaru is coming to fight Inuyasha. I tried to talk to him about it. He won't listen to me.”

“You set us up!” Inuyasha yells at her, grabbing her by the shoulders and throwing her at Miroku. “Tie her up.”

Miroku winces, approaching her cautiously. “Who is Sesshomaru? And tie her up??”

“Avalon? I thought I could trust you?” Kagome’s face falls in hurt. 

“Look, I can’t control him and you can trust me. Why do you think I’m warning you?” 

“Forgive me.” Miroku rises up from behind her, smashing an urn into the back of her head, knocking her unconscious as the ground thunders with the approaching assault. 

“Tie her up,” Kagome agrees with Inuyasha. “Shippo, make sure she stays here.” Kagome and Inuyasha run out of the hut together. “I sense a shikon shard.” 

Inuyasha draws Tetsusaiga in preparation, just as a large red oni comes over the tops of the houses with Sesshomaru sitting on its shoulder. ‘What good could it possibly do to allow him to live?’ Sesshomaru leaps off the oni and flies at his brother, slamming his fist into the ground, releasing dokkasu, that forces Kagome to separate from Inuyasha. “Slow as usual Inuyasha?” He scents Avalon. ‘Dammit, I told you to stay behind.’ 

“What do you want, bastard?!” He holds his sleeve in front of his face, Inuyasha backs up from the fog of poison. Tetsusaiga is in his other hand, raised and ready to attack. 

“Tetsusaiga of course. Or have you forgotten?” Sesshomaru attacks, striking Inuyasha's face and hands with his whip. 

Inuyasha blocks Sesshomaru’s whip using his sword, then charges head long at Sesshomaru, trying to strike Sesshomaru down. 

It only takes a few flicks of his whip to knock the katana out of Inuyasha’s hand. Tetsusaiga flips out of Inuyasha’s hand and lands on the ground near Sesshomaru’s feet. Sesshomaru snorts contemptuously, but is distracted. ‘Dammit, where are you?’ He can’t see Avalon but he knows she is here. 

He lifts the blade from the ground. “You never will learn to master the true power of Tetsusaiga. Never more than a pathetic HANYOU!” He lets loose the windscar, sending white light flying at Inuyasha, churning up the earth. 

“Sesshomaru!” Miroku yells, dragging an unconscious, bound Avalon behind him. “Stop!” 

Inuyasha smirks, running to put himself in front of Miroku and Avalon. “Give me back Tetsusaiga, bastard!” 

Sesshomaru returns the smirk and lets loose another blast of Kaze no Kizu sending it directly at Avalon and Miroku. ‘Wake up, Onaga.’ 

Avalon stirs in that moment. She sees the wave of Kaze no Kizu coming towards Inuyasha and whoever is holding her. She instantly raises a barrier around all of them. “Release me,” she commands. The energy hits her barrier and rolls over it harmlessly, then strikes the ground behind the barrier, turning the ground up. 

“You think I’ve become so weak as to care for humans?” Sesshomaru raises the sword threateningly again.

“You said she was his?” Miroku asks Inuyasha. “Oh shit!”

Another wave comes flying at them, turning up the earth. 

“You will never be able to harness the power of Kaze no Kizu!” Sesshomaru roars at Inuyasha. 

Avalon looks over her shoulder at Miroku. “He won’t stop. I told you I don’t control him. Now let me go! My barrier can only do so much.” She struggles against the bonds. ‘If my hands weren’t bound, I’d summon my sword.’ 

“Jaken!” Sesshomaru calls to the imp who is still on the shoulder of the ogre. “Behold Inuyasha, the true power of Tetsusaiga!” 

“Hai, Milord. GO FORTH!” Jaken calls as he points his staff at the mountain. The oni walks towards it, lifting his right hand high in the air and brings it down upon the side of the mountain. A loud thunderous sound fills the air as glowing lights surround the area where the oni hit. The light gathers until hundreds of demons of various kinds fly forth off the mountain into the air.

Avalon watches, still struggling, trying to get free of the ropes. 

Sesshomaru turns on the demons flying from the mountains and sends another wave of Tetsusaiga’s fury against them, shattering the mountain and destroying the demons in one fell swoop.

“What?” Inuyasha asks, shocked.

“The mountain and the demons are destroyed,” Miroku says shocked. “I will end this.” He pulls back the beads on his right hand, but before he has a chance to send them, Sesshomaru sends another wave of white light flashing at them. 

Avalon keeps her barrier in place but lunges at Miroku, knocking him off balance. “No.” She manages to wrestle her body around Miroku, where her crotch is in his face but her legs are locked around his right hand, keeping the beads in place. Avalon changes the dimension of her barrier to only protect her and Miroku. 

Sesshomaru stands proudly in front of Inuyasha. “Do you see now? The power of Tetsusaiga? Forged from the fang of our father? A hanyou, would never master it.” 

Miroku grabs Avalon by the ass squeezing her cheeks firmly. “Such a nice bottom,” he swoons. 

Sesshomaru turns on Inuyasha sending another wave of Kaze no Kizu, while signaling Jaken to take Kagome out with the giant, red oni. ‘Spare them?’ Sesshomaru laughs to himself. ‘I will kill them all.’

Jaken directs the oni to go after Kagome. The ground shakes as it comes charging for her. It’s fist rises, ready to slam down on her.

Inuyasha sees the oni going after Kagome. He runs to protect her screaming, “Kagome!” He leaps into the air, severing the arm that was aiming to crush her. The oni pulls back its stump, roaring in pain. Jaken stumbles and falls off. The oni charges wildly towards Sesshomaru. 

Sesshomaru rises into the air, slapping the oni in the face to redirect it. ‘I, Sesshomaru will not love a human.’ He sends it stampeding at Avalon and Miroku, questioning his sanity at the moment. 

Avalon sees the oni charging at them. ‘Really Sesshomaru?’ Avalon sighs, feeling the monk still squeezing her ass. The oni stomps at the barrier. “Miroku, can I trust you?” she pleads, genuinely. 

“Why is he attacking you?” Miroku struggles to free himself. 

“Sesshomaru! You asshole!” Inuyasha flings himself at Sesshomaru. 

“I honestly don’t know Miroku. I told you I have no control over him. Do you believe me now?” 

Miroku nods. “I agree to nothing that allows him to live.” The ground shakes as the ogre gets closer. 

“Well that leaves us at an impasse, doesn’t it? I don’t want anyone to die. Everyone needs to live.” 

The ogre reaches them and starts stomping on the barrier, flattening them into the ground.

“Miroku-sama!” Kagome screams as they’re beaten into the dirt.

Sesshomaru launches another attack at Inuyasha as he attempts to run at the ogre. “Now it’s time Inuyasha. DIE!” He flings kaze no kizu at the hanyou, knowing he has no escape this time. 

Inuyasha watches in horror as the light comes at him. He has an idea, not sure if it will work or not, but it’s better than nothing. He grabs his sheath, holding it in front of him. The energy wave is absorbed by the sheath. Inuyasha stares in disbelief. The corner of his lips curve up.

Avalon pleads with Miroku. “Come on! We are both going to die if you keep being so stubborn. I want you to suck up the oni but you can’t attack Sesshomaru. The battle is between brothers.” 

“I’ll only agree if I suck Sesshomaru and the oni up,” Miroku grits out, with each pound of the ogre burying them. 

Sesshomaru slams Tetsusaiga into the sheathe. “You use the sheathe to resist me?” 

Inuyasha smiles, holding him off with the sheath. “You will see when I crack open your head with it.” 

Sesshomaru slams the katana into the sheathe. Inuyasha raises it to block. Sesshomaru rushes him again, this time flicking the sheathe out of Inuyasha’s hand. “One more swing Inuyasha,” he gloats. “That’s all I need.”

“Smash them!” Jaken cheers from the shoulder of the ogre. “Just what we need to fix the mistake he made bonding you!” 

“JAKEN I AM GOING TO SMASH YOU!” Avalon screams over the thunderous pounds. She summons her sword into her bound hands. The sword points down at her feet. “Well, since you will not comply dear monk, I will have to try something much more dangerous.” Avalon lips press into a firm line. 

Miroku’s body begins to flop at the pressure of the ogre beating them into the ground. He reaches for the beads on his wrist, trying to free them.

Sesshomaru prepares to swing at Inuyasha, only for a bright light to hit the sword, ending the transformation. “Sesshomaru!” Kagome calls. “Inuyasha, make your escape!”

Sesshomaru glares at Kagome. ‘Avalon was correct.’ 

“I can see it!” Kagome screams, losing another arrow. “A shard of the shikon jewel!” 

Sesshomaru dodges the arrow and flies at Kagome. 

Inuyasha leaps after Sesshomaru. “No you don’t! Leave her out of it!” He slashes at Sesshomaru’s face, cutting him on the right cheek. 

Sesshomaru flies backwards, landing on his feet. “Call her off Inuyasha. Even you as a hanyou should have enough honor for that!”

“We’re going to die!” Miroku yells. “Let my hand go!” 

“Not a chance Miroku. You will not agree to not kill Sesshomaru and I cannot allow it.” Avalon cuts the ropes binding her wrists, keeping her legs wrapped around Miroku’s wrist. She points the sword away from her body calling, “Sandasutoraiku!” Purple lightning swirls along the blade as Avalon forces the purifying energy out.

Jaken shrieks as the bolts of lightning come flying at him, running away off the oni. The oni screams in pain, disintegrating. 

‘This is ridiculous,’ Sesshomaru curses Avalon and resumes his attack of Inuyasha, unable to call forth the full transformation of the blade again. His hackles rise at the lightning storm by the oni, but his wish now, is to destroy the mistake his father made, as if blotting him out, will purge him of his own mistake. 

Inuyasha looks at Sesshomaru and starts speaking. “I figured you out Sesshomaru. Because you are a youkai, you shouldn’t be able to grasp the Tetsusaiga. That left arm of yours must belong to nengin. You’re using a shard of the shikon jewel to connect the arm to your body.” He raises his claws. “If I can lop off that nengin arm, you will no longer have what it takes to hold onto Tetsusaiga and that’s not all.” Inuysha charges at Sesshomaru, arm raised. “ When you lose that arm, I’ll have myself yet another shard of the jewel.” 

“Baka,” Sesshomaru scoffs, flying at him. Sesshomaru ignores the bait and sends his whip snapping at Inuyasha to keep him at bay. 

Kagome sends another arrow flying at Sesshomaru. 

“The next one is aimed at your heart!” Kagome yells. 

Sesshomaru snorts and with lightning speed, flies to the monk, forcing himself through Avalon’s barrier painfully and snatches Miroku by the neck threatening to break it. “Make her back off Inuyasha. Or it’s him who will pay.” 

“Miroku! Kagome back down.” Inuyasha runs at Sesshomaru trying to free Miroku.

Avalon lays on the ground dropping her barrier. “Let him go please!”

Inuyasha reaches Sesshomaru, grabbing him by the left arm. 

Sesshomaru grins twisting Miroku’s neck, making him yelp. “What use is this monk?” He twists, slamming Miroku’s body into Inuyasha, sending Inuyasha flying from the impact, but not releasing Miroku. “What use is a hanyou?” He drags the monk behind him. 

“I can’t breathe.” Miroku twists his hands against Sesshomaru’s wrist. 

Avalon stands up and walks towards Sesshomaru. He hasn’t realized that his left arm is missing. She feels remorse and it shows on her face. “He is an enemy of Naraku! Please don’t kill him.”

Inuyasha catches himself and grabs the sword from the left arm. “Your ignorance surprises me Sesshomaru. I really thought you would have realized it by now.” 

Sesshomaru glances down at his left arm, not moved that it’s missing. “And what will you do Inuyasha?” he taunts him, tightening his grip on Miroku’s throat.

“Avalon!” Kagome runs after her. “Make him stop!” 

Avalon bites her bottom lip. “Sesshomaru, does your word mean nothing?” 

His eyes harden. “I made no promises.” He flings Miroku into Kagome and Avalon, knocking them all down and rushes Inuyasha. He strikes with his whip at Inuyasha’s face and then his legs, and his hand, in an attempt to free Tetsusaiga from his brother’s grasp again. 

Avalon holds Miroku, examining his neck. 

Inuyasha holds tightly to his sword. “You bastard, I’ll kill you.” Inuyasha charges at him, swinging his sword wildly, desperately trying to strike him down. 

Miroku gasps in pain holding his neck. “Let me up,” he pants, reaching for the beads again. 

“Let him go, Avalon!” Kagome stands up with pain in her face and arrow aimed at Avalon’s heart. 

“You would kill a human, Kagome?” 

“Don’t make me,” her lips tremble and her hands shake against the bow. “This has to end. You can’t change him. He’s evil.” 

Avalon shakes her head sadly. “Please Kagome. I can’t let Sesshomaru die.” 

“Let him go,” Kagome warns her again. 

Miroku twists out of Avalon’s grip, kicking her feet out from underneath her and runs at Sesshomaru, loosening the beads on his wrist. 

“Miroku!” Avalon calls pleadingly “SESSHOMARU WATCH OUT!” she screams helplessly stuck on the ground as Kagome trains the arrow on her. Avalon closes her eyes and with a heavy heart she quickly pulls a bo-shuriken that is laced with sleeping poison and flicks it at Kagome. She rolls out of the way quickly. Kagome lets her arrow loose. nearly hitting Avalon. Avalon scrambles after Miroku. 

Miroku looses the beads off his wrist, but then lifts his staff to swing it at Avalon’s head, just as she catches up to him. 

Avalon brings her sword up, blocking his staff. She pushes forward and kicks him in the side. 

Miroku twirls, slapping the leg with the side of the staff, tearing into the fabric of the kimono, then twirls, batting her head with the end of the staff with enough force to knock her down again. 

“Pathetic,” Sesshomaru’s eyes flick over at Avalon and Miroku scuffling. “Your companion cannot even incapacitate a woman.” He lunges again, ducking a wide swing to his head, then flips over Inuyasha, grabbing his head and spraying dokkasu into his eyes.

Inuyasha groans in pain, rubbing his eyes. 

Avalon hits at Miroku dodging some of his attacks as he dodges some of hers. They seem to be a match in battle. “Damn woman!” Miroku yells in fury. 

“ Lecherous houshi!,” Avalon yells back. 

Inuyasha rubs at his eyes, they burn and sting. “Dammit. I can’t see. Huh?” Inuyasha smells a flow of energy. ‘I can sense it.’ “The vortex of his power, I can smell the wind scraping. It's against the fissure where the power flows through. I bet I can slice through the fissure and release the power.” Inuyasha swings his sword where the smell is, unleashing the Kaze no Kizu at Sesshomaru 

The light comes flashing at Sesshomaru. His eyes turn red in shock. His yoki grows in an attempt to block the blast. At the last minute, he is enveloped in a black hue and spirited away, while pain flashes through his body and his skin sizzles. 

“You treacherous wench!” Jaken swings Nintojo into the side of Avalon’s head, splitting into her skull, drawing blood. “You knew this would happen! You knew he would get hit by Kaze no Kizu and you asked him to do it anyway!” When she collapses, Jaken looks at her shocked. ‘Did I really hit her that hard?’ 

Miroku pushes Avalon off him and glares at Jaken, threatening to open his hand. 

“Sesshomaru-sama! Wait for me!” Jaken yells, running off before Miroku can catch him, blasting nintojo behind him to keep them from catching him. 

Miroku lets Jaken go and runs back to their room, dragging Avalon with them. He ties a rope around hands, knees, and ankles, then adds it around her elbows and then ties the two together for good measure. Inuyasha brings Kagome in the room and starts trying to wake her up. “We have to track him. Wake up Kagome.” 

Kagome slowly wakes up, her eyes feel heavy and her body doesn’t want to respond “What happened?” she finally says half dazed. 

“She gave you a sleeping potion,” Miroku answers, making sure the ropes are very, very tight. “We need to track the shard. Can you stand?” 

“Let me try,” Kagome says. She goes on all fours and tries to lift her body off the ground. She stumbles and falls forward. 

Inuyasha offers her his back so they can start moving immediately. “We have to get to him and take the shard away and then figure out what to do with her.” He motions his head at Avalon. 

Shippo looks at the unconscious woman “She’s scary.” 

“Shippo she is with Sesshomaru,” Kagome says from Inuyasha’s back.

“Who is she anyway?” Shippo asks. 

“Someone connected to Sesshomaru,” Inuyasha answers dismissively. “Let’s go.” He puts on Kagome’s backpack and starts walking out the door. 

Miroku lifts Avalon hefting her on his shoulder and follows Inuyasha.


	31. Rin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still looking for a Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru lands in a flash of white light, in a small clearing, in the middle of a gnarled forest. His body feels like it’s on fire, like he’s been seared from the inside out. The light had smashed into his chest, knocking the air out of him. He was fairly certain several of his ribs were broken from the assault. ‘Dammit,’ he thinks to himself angrily. ‘I should have run him through.’ He spreads his pelt out and allows himself to rest and recover from being hit with the Kaze no Kizu. ‘Onaga,’ he laments. ‘What have I done?’ 

A little girl in a pink kisode with a side ponytail wanders the woods when she sees a strange looking man. He is laying on the ground with his head looking away, but is covered in blood and wounds. She wonders if he is alive. She slowly walks over to check on him. 

A scent hits his nose. ‘Human.’ He rolls his eyes behind his lids as the little steps get closer to him. ‘A child,’ he scoffs, knowing the steps are too soft for an adult. He waits for her to be near his shoulder before he lets his eyes flame red and he lifts his trunk, snarling at her. 

The little girl gasps. “You’re alive!” She smiles. “I know just the thing! Wait right there.” She runs away without waiting for an answer. She calls over her shoulder. “I’ll be right back.” 

For a moment he’s speechless.  _ “She’ll wear a tattered pink kimono, her hair will be in a side ponytail. She won’t talk to anyone.”  _ But then this girl’s kosode didn’t look that tattered but she definitely was not quiet. ‘It isn’t her,’ he tells himself stubbornly, trying to stand up. He attempts to roll onto his right side to force his body up, only for pain to flash through his entire body, preventing him from moving. ‘I’ll ignore the child.’ He leans back against his pelt and closes his eyes again. 

The child returns with a container of water. She walks up to him. “Uh, this will be cold,” she warns as she dumps the water on his head. Then she steps back, running down the trail back home. “I’ll bring you food,” she calls as her feet carry her away. 

‘I’m going to kill her,’ he thinks wryly. ‘Avalon and this child.’ He knuckles his brow once again trying to lift his body off the forest floor to escape before she returns. He wipes his face of the water she dumped on him and flops back against his pelt. ‘I can’t move.’ 

About twenty minutes later, she returns with a large leaf that has a fire roasted fish and a water container. “Here, I brought you dinner. I’m Rin by the way. What’s your name, Mister?” she asks and gets closer to him. She holds the fish and water out. 

Sesshomaru coughs, then regrets the pressure it puts on his ribs. ‘Rin? Onaga what did you do?’ He debates whether or not to answer the child, but she isn’t at all like the one that Avalon said she would be. “I don’t eat human food.” 

“Ooooohhh!” Rin grins widely, displaying a missing tooth. “Then what do you eat? I can try to get it for you. I can be very resourceful.” 

“I don’t need anything,” he spits out, hoping to make her leave. ‘Her tooth is missing.’ He closes his eyes, clenching his fist and then exhales. “Where are your parents?” 

“Oh they are home right now. I should actually get going soon, but I have a little while. They won’t be worried if I’m a little late. You’re all alone out here, so I can keep you company. Do you want to play a game?” 

“No,” he says tersely, wishing he could smell cantaloupe and honeydew instead of dirt and flowers that are on the little girl. His body is killing him. Even with Tenseiga’s barrier, he sustained a battering from kaze no kizu. 

“Are you sure Mister? It’s awfully lonely out here.” She looks at him sadly.

He wants to tell her to go home, but then wonders at what point her family will be killed.  _ “She’ll witness her family’s murder.”  _ He groans in disbelief that he is agreeing to this ‘game’, if for nothing more than to prevent her from going home. ‘Children should not see death.’ “What game?” 

“We can play tongue twisters!” she says smiling happily. “I’ll start. Akamakigami, kimakigami, aomakigami (red scroll, yellow scroll, blue scroll),” she says proudly. 

‘I can’t believe I’m doing this,’ he exhales heavily. “ Namamugi namagome namatamago. (raw wheat, raw rice, raw eggs).” 

Rin smiles. “You're so good at this! Um, Sumomomo momomo momonouchi (both plums and peaches are members of the peach family)” 

His only solace is that neither Jaken or Avalon are here to see this. He breathes in, deeply annoyed, watching the sun beginning to set and says, “ uraniwa ni wa niwa, niwa ni wa niwa niwatori ga iru (There are two chickens in the backyard and two chickens in the front yard).” 

Rin looks as the sun touches the horizon. “I should go home now or I’ll get in trouble. Bye.” She turns and starts walking away. 

‘I can’t move,’ he thinks quietly, ‘I can’t stop her.’ He wonders what will happen when the sun sets. How long will it be until her family is killed? Sesshomaru closes his eyes as Rin leaves, relaxing against his pelt. 

Rin slowly walks home, traversing a trail she has moved about many, many times. She stops in her tracks when she sees five horses outside her hut and hears screaming coming from inside. She hears her father yell, “Leave them alone!” Then she hears a sickening thud and a slurping sound. She covers her mouth, unsure what to do. 

Her mother’s screams can be heard and she hears an unfamiliar male voice. “Silence wench.” Then a slap of flesh. Rin slowly creeps to the back of the hut to see in a window. 

Her father is dead on the floor along with her brothers. Her mother is crying. She watches a stranger hold her mother around her neck. She tries to tug at the man’s hands to free herself but slowly the struggle ceases and her mother’s hands and body go limp.

Rin feels sick at what she sees. Her stomach lurches. She clamps her hands over her mouth. She knows she can’t make a sound or she will be found. Rin backs away slowly, walking backwards into the woods. She sits beneath a tree, far enough away that they will not be able to hear her cries. She notices a bright light behind her. She turns and sees her home is on fire and the five men are riding away on their horses. She makes her way slowly back to the strange man that played tongue twisters with her. Tears stream down her face. She finds him right where he was before. She slowly walks to him to cuddle into his arm before whispering, “Rin’s alone now too.” She silently cries in his side 

His first instinct is to push her off of him, but he can smell the blood, the fire and far off in the distance he heard the screams, yet he still can’t move. Instead he lifts his arm up and awkwardly pats her head. ‘So you will teach me love?’ “Do as you wish,” he says placidly, still too proud to tell her to stay. 

Rin nods her head continuing to cry until she falls asleep. 

He shakes his head, trying to get rid of the guilt that is growing in his chest. “Rest little one,” he whispers as he pulls his mokomoko over her to keep her warm. He pushes the side of his kimono down and pulls off the rest of the human arm, plucking the shard off and tucking it into his kimono. He’s exhausted but he can’t sleep. His mind is on Avalon, what had happened before they left and how she would never be free of him and he could never be the one she needed.

Avalon wakes groggily being carried on someone's back. Her head doesn’t hurt but she remembers being knocked out, but by who she wonders. She recognizes the monk’s robes and feels his hands holding her butt. “Why do you hate me Miroku-sama?” 

He pinches her backside for good measure with a smirk on his face. “I don’t hate you. I simply don’t trust you.” 

“So you smash things on peoples heads you don’t trust? Are you at least enjoying grabbing my butt?” she says gumbling. ‘Of course, I have to be carried by the lecher.’

“It’s so round and soft,” he rubs his cheek into the side of her ass. 

“You just keep enjoying it while you can lecher. You're doing this to a married woman,” she says pouting. ‘Not that it matters.’ Her face falls.

“You would be delusional enough to think you’re married to Sesshomaru,” Inuyasha says with a wary Kagome on his back as they run in the direction of the missing shard. “Kaede-baba said you knew about Kikyo’s ashes.” 

“Yeah I did. She needed to be resurrected to defeat Naraku,” Avalon says crestfallen, grief taking over. 

Kagome points over Inuyasha’s shoulders to a forest. “That direction Inuyasha. I think it’s there.” 

Avalon looks to where Kagome points. “Tracking the shard are you Kagome?” 

Kagome ducks under Inuyasha’s shoulder not wanting to answer. “We’ll get it off him,” Inuyasha says haughtily. “We’ll take him out for sure this time.” 

“You two need to stop fighting and start being brothers,” Avalon huffs. 

“Like that will happen.” Inuyasha stares off in the distance, the words almost coming out painfully. 

“It can happen. There is no reason for you two to fight.” Avalon sighs. “Miroku stop rubbing my butt,” she hisses.

Miroku pinches her ass again, just to show he doesn’t care. 

“Miroku-sama, enough,” Kagome says quietly. “I thought I could trust you.” 

“Kagome, I am truly sorry I knocked you out. It was the only thing I could think of. You are too pure to kill a human.” Avalon shakes her head. “It would destroy you. I couldn’t let you do that and I couldn’t let you,” she says turning her head to look up at Miroku, “suck up Sesshomaru. We all need to work together to take out our enemy Naraku.” Avalon sighs, noticing that the sun is low on the horizon and will be setting shortly. “I really am not your enemy. What can I do to prove it?” 

“Stay out of my way,” Inuyasha growls out. 

“Kaede-sama said you’re making things worse,” Kagome says softly. “But if we need something from you, don’t interfere when we confront Sesshomaru.” 

Miroku nods in agreement. “I agree. If you aren’t an enemy, then you can let us handle it and stay back.” 

“Just because I’m not your enemy doesn’t mean I can allow you to kill Sesshomaru. Kagome, I am not trying to make things worse. I was forced into this time. I was kidnapped by Naraku for five months. He used me as a sex toy.” A tear falls from her eye. “He made me attack Sesshomaru and Sesshomaru nearly killed me. I was bleeding to death and he saved me. So how can you ask me to sit back and let you kill the person who saved my life?” 

“Because if you don’t, you’ll just get yourself killed.” Inuyasha’s eyes bolt open. “Kagome?” 

“I sense more shards coming in the direction of the other one.” She grips Inuyasha’s shoulders tighter.

“Revenge,” Inuyasha runs faster, leaping from the forest floor, into the tops of the trees to get a better view. 

‘No!’ “Miroku we have to hurry! You may not like Sesshomaru but if it’s Naraku who is after him.” Avalon gulps, “If he absorbs him. I don’t know how strong Naraku will be.” ‘I may not be happy with him but if Naraku absorbs him.’ Avalon’s heart lurches forward and she suddenly vomits. ‘Would I be bound to Naraku?’

Miroku gulps, doding the vomit. “Avalon-sama?” 

“I’m bound to Sesshomaru. If Naraku absorbs him, would I be bound to Naraku?” she voices her fear, feeling dizzy. 

“I don’t know enough about their bonds,” Miroku says gently. “If it happens, we will find a way to break it.” 

“Death,” Avalon says faintly. “I will not live being bound to Naraku, not even for a day.” 

Miroku shakes his head. “Then it will be his death.” 

“We need to hurry. Please.” Tears start streaming down her cheeks as hopelessness washes through her. 

The group runs faster, trying desperately to get to Sesshomaru in time.

He wakes to the feeling of yoki coming quickly at him. The scent is the same one he had Avalon wash off her body in the river the day after he bound her. He attempts to force himself up, only for the light weight on his arm to roll off with a thud. He shakes Rin, trying to wake her quickly as the presence comes closer. “Get up.” He shakes her more harshly. “Get up!” 

Rin’s eyes slowly open, they are puffy and swollen. “Hmmm?”

“Ha ha ha, this is perfect! I guess poor Avalon dying was unnecessary. I could have just waited for this moment. I do miss my bed warmer.” The baboon clad man steps out menacingly. Tentacles shoot out of his body, wrapping around Sesshomaru and the little girl. “And a jewel shard. How wonderful.” He smirks under his mask as his body comes closer to Sesshomaru. 

“Run!” Sesshomaru barks at Rin. He swallows hard, still unable to move his body. ‘Not again.’ He closes his eyes. They bleed red, forcing his yoki to heal his injuries enough to move. He hacks through the tentacles with his claws, freeing himself and lands on the forest floor, in the shape of a giant white dog. He stumbles forward weakly, standing between Naraku and Rin. ‘I don’t have energy for this.’ He pants, trying to catch his breath, wondering how long he can hold the transformation. 

Rin looks on in horror, unable to move, holding her hands over her mouth. Eyes wide ‘Am I going to lose my new friend too?’

“Ha ha ha ha, you are too weak for this Sesshomaru.” Naraku’s tentacles come out, wrapping around the large dog’s neck, dragging him towards the ground. The tentacles lap hungrily at Sesshomaru’s yoki. “Do you like my new power? If only Avalon could see, she loved you. She told me in not so many words right before she begged me to fill her,” Naraku cackles. 

Sesshomaru’s eyes widen enraged. He lashes out with his teeth, breaking the tentacles again, releasing dokkasu through his fangs. He bites down on Naraku’s shoulder. Naraku grunts in pain, giving Sesshomaru time to push the little girl out of the way, trying to get her to move. ‘Go!’ He barks at her trying to scare her before his back legs are wrapped again. He feels like his skin is being peeled from his body. 

“Trying to protect another human? You will fail her just as you failed Avalon.” Naraku’s tentacles wrap around Sesshomaru’s body, while one shoots out towards the girl, wrapping around her waist dragging her to his body. “Now be a good dog and die!” he says as the tentacles constrict around Sesshomaru’s body, crushing him and sucking away his yoki. 

He pants, grappling with the tentacles, eyes on Rin, who’s crying for help. He reverses his transformation and slips loose, landing on his stomach on the forest floor. He forces himself up and slashes at the tentacles holding her, grabbing her around the waist and tucking her into his chest. “Hold on.” He attempts to fly away only for his legs to get caught again. He lacks the strength for this fight and he knows it. ‘I’m sorry, Onaga.’ He closes his eyes, wrapping his body around Rin’s as he’s sucked into Naraku’s shell. ‘Give me enough strength to protect this one.’ 

Inuyasha leaps through the trees with Kagome on his back. He draws his sword, yelling, “Kaze no Kazu,” unleashing the windscar on Naraku. 

Naraku is so occupied with absorbing Sesshomaru that he does not notice Inuyasha coming and he is hit with the Kaze no Kazu. Naraku feels his side being burned and torn apart. He flees, dropping an unconscious Sesshomaru who is still wrapped protectively around Rin, completely shielding her body in his mokomoko, with his knees tucked around her. 

“Sesshomaru!” Avalon screams on Miroku’s shoulder, seeing the damage of the Kaze no Kazu and Sesshomaru laying on the ground curled up. “Let me down!” She starts thrashing in Miroku’s grasp. 

“Let her go,” Kagome says, running to Sesshomaru to assess the damage.

“We can’t trust her!” Inuyasha reminds her, grabbing her shoulder before Kagome can reach Sesshomaru.

Miroku sets Avalon down on her side. “I’m sorry, we can’t free you now.” 

Avalon’s eyes blaze. She pushes reiki into her limbs. She stretches her arms and legs snapping the ropes and runs for Sesshomaru, uncaring what they think. She reaches him quickly and she curls her body around him protectively. She has tears in her eyes. “I’m sorry.” Just then she notices the little girl clutched in his grasp. “Rin?” She reaches in between his chest. 

Sesshomaru has a vice-like grip on Rin, refusing to release her, even unconscious. Even as she sleeps in his grasp, the little girl clings to his chest. Sesshomaru’s senses vaguely come alive and he blindly lashes out, sending his whip flying and circling in a protective, expanding circle, heading straight for Avalon.

Avalon jumps back forming a protective barrier around herself, hurt that he would lash out at her. She stumbles backwards getting out of his range. 

Sesshomaru curls back around Rin, guarding her with his own body.

Inuyasha comes forward with Tetsusaiga drawn. “I should do it now, while he’s out of it.”

“Inuyasha he’s hurt!” Kagome argues. 

Avalon steps in front of Inuyasha. “You aren’t doing anything to him,” she hisses out, summoning her sword. “He is protecting Rin, a little human girl. You can’t be that cold.” 

Inuyasha tries to peek over Avalon’s shoulder and his mouth falls open seeing his pureblooded, elitist brother, cuddling a human girl. “Fine...but get the shard off him, Avalon. If you are his mate, you shouldn’t have any problem with that.” 

“Pff, you don’t even know what it means but I will try. Kagome can you tell me where it is?” 

Kagome comes closer to Sesshomaru. “It’s in his kimono--” she shrieks and leaps out of the way of his outstretched claw, slashing at her.

His eyes are still closed but his hand managed to reach around Avalon, right for Kagome’s ankle. 

Avalon pushes Kagome away. “Get back! Sorry, I’m not sure what he is capable of right now.” 

Kagome is caught by Inuyasha. “He’s half asleep,” Inuyasha argues. “Where in his kimono, I’ll take it.”

Sesshomaru starts snarling, trying to lift his body up with vacant eyes. 

Avalon gets up, shoving Inuyasha and Kagome away. She keeps pushing, making them both stumble backwards awkwardly. “No one but me is going near him right now,” Avalon says in a deadly tone. “I don’t want anyone hurt. Not you, not Kagome, not Miroku, not Shippo, not me, not him and especially not Rin!” she says seething. 

“I’m not going near him,” Shippo balks.

“I’ll stay here,” Miroku agrees.

“Hurry up or I kill him,” Inuyasha snarls out. 

Sesshomaru holds Rin against his chest, still growling, blindly warning them to stay back. 

“You know we could just wait for him to wake,” she says, not really expecting Inuyasha to agree. 

“You really want me to just do it don’t you?” Inuyasha says giddily. “Where in his kimono?” he asks Kagome.

“By his chest,” Kagome says, hiding behind Inuyasha. 

“You try to harm him and I will stop you Inuyasha,” she warns. “I'll get it.” She turns slowly walking towards him and starts singing to him, wondering if he will recognize her voice in his sleep. _ “Lithium, don't want to lock me up inside.” _ She walks slowly towards him. 

Sesshomaru pulls Rin closer to his chest, but he knows the voice. He knows who she is. He falls on his side, surrendering to the pain in his body, but his grip on Rin remains. 

Avalon keeps approaching slowly  _ “Lithium, don't want to forget how it feels without Lithium, I want to stay in love with my sorrow.” _ She finally reaches him and gently moves her hand along his chest. “ _ Oh, but, God, I want to let it go, Come to bed, don't make me sleep alone, Couldn't hide the emptiness; you let it show _ .” She slides her hand beneath his clothing searching for the shard. 

He catches her by the wrist and pulls it to his mouth, closing his lips over her skin, his eyes open weakly, exhausted. “Onaga?” he whispers. 

“I’m here,” she says in a whisper, bringing her lips down to his forehead. Her other hand moves inside his clothing, searching for the shard. 

“Onaga?” Inuyasha scoffs. “Probably because she never shuts up.”

“Sit!” Kagome screams, sending him to the ground.

“I found her,” Sesshomaru, raises his mouth, searching for Avalon’s. 

“I know.” She brings her lips down to his, finally finding the shard and pulling it from his kimono. “I need to return this to the Shikon Miko.” 

He nods, his eyes hooding over again. He lets Avalon go, the same time he releases his hold on Rin, who still clings to his stomach 

“I’ll be back,” she assures him. Avalon gets up and walks over to Kagome handing her the shard. “Here,” she says delicately. 

Kagome takes the shard from Avalon and looks at Inuyasha.

“Let’s go,” Inuyasha says quickly.

“What if Naraku comes back?” Kagome argues.

“Not our problem,” Inuyasha grunts out. 

Kagome only shakes her head, biting her lower lip, unsure what to do.

“Let’s go Kagome-sama,” Miroku encourages her. 

“I would like you all to stay. I think it would help if we could talk without anyone being tied up,” Avalon says hopefully. 

“Inuyasha,” Kagome says, touching his shoulder. “If Naraku comes back, Sesshomaru isn’t in any position to defend them.”

“Good maybe he’ll die,” Inuyasha bites out.

“Sit!” she screams at him. “Even you can’t be that mean. You know what? You leave. I’m staying.” She sits down on the grass, refusing to move.

“Baka!” Inuyasha growls and leaps off into the trees, leaving Miroku and Shippo with Kagome. 

“Arigato, Kagome. I do appreciate you staying,” Avalon says. She walks back to Sesshomaru and lays down next to him. Her hand slides along his cheek, feather light. 

A groan escapes his lips and his eyes flicker lightly. “Forgive me,” he mutters, not reaching for Avalon, or bringing his nose to her neck as he usually would have. “Forgive me.” 

Avalon leans down, brushing her lips against his. “I forgive you for what you did, don’t hurt me again,” she says softly against his lips. 

He nods, still not moving close to her. His lips yearn for her skin. From here, he can smell her but he needs more. He’s too ashamed of himself to approach her, so he lays on the forest floor, unable to move. 

Avalon lays her head against his chest, absentmindedly playing with his hair and her other hand reaches Rin, checking her pulse, relieved to find it strong. 

Sesshomaru’s lips are dry and his throat hurts. His body is burned from Kaze no Kizu and Naraku. The friction between him and Avalon had never truly been settled before they were separated. “Privacy,” his voice cracks as he speaks. “Privacy.” 

Avalon raises her head to look into his eyes and she nods. “Can I ask you all to leave for a little while? I’m not sending you away for good, it’s just there are some things that...um...me and...um...Sesshomaru-sama need to talk about.” 

“Let’s go,” Inuyasha says, putting distance between them. They set up camp a ways away to give Avalon and Sesshomaru privacy. 

Sesshomaru shakily touches Avalon’s wrist. “We must talk. Even touching you feels wrong.” 

Avalon’s heart clenches with pain. “What...what are you saying?” she asks as tears start forming in her eyes. 

“I hurt you.” He flicks the tears from her face. “I forced you. Despicable.” 

“You stopped yourself,” she argues quietly. 

He brings her palm over his heart, struggling to stay awake. “Shame. I gave you my word, I wouldn’t.” 

“So what now?” she says holding her hand over his heart. 

He shakes his head, fighting an internal battle with words that sit on his tongue like lead. “Why did you give yourself to me after?” 

“I could see how much you needed it and you weren’t trying to force me. Sesshomaru, you weren’t in control fully when you came so close to taking me against my will.” 

He nods, not wanting to accept the truth that he could be so out of control, so irrational and so wild. “Stay with me, Onaga. Forgive me, I do not deserve your trust.” 

Avalon’s hand goes to his face, gently cupping his cheek. “I forgive you, if you promise to never hurt me again, not even to teach me my place,” she says, looking into his eyes pleadingly. 

“Your heart? Or your body?” He sets his palm over her heart. Maybe it is the pain speaking but in that moment he gives in to the uncomfortable twinges of pain that aren’t just caused by his injuries. “I am doomed to hurt you.” 

Avalon shakes her head. “You will mess up. I know you will say or do something that will make my heart ache but I am asking you to not hurt me intentionally, not maliciously, not trying to teach me a lesson. It’s all I can offer you. I can’t expect more from you than what I expect of myself.” 

“I have never felt guilt before,” he admits sourly. “Never.” 

“Have you ever done something that you were ashamed of before?” she asks tenderly. 

“Once.” His eyes ice over and rests his head on his mokomoko. “Do not ask.” 

“But you felt no guilt, then I feel honored,” she says, bringing her lips to his kissing him gently. 

“Pain,” he mutters against her lips as he returns the kiss. “So much pain.” 

“What can I do to ease your pain?” she says bring her lips back to his. 

“Nothing can bring her back,” his voice weakens as his mind begins to drift, seeking sleep. “I love your scent.” 

“Sleep, I’ll be here when you wake and we can figure things out,” she whispers against his lips, kissing him one last time. Her heart flutters. ‘He loves my scent.’

“Mmh,” he groans, finally pushing his nose under her chin, looking for that sweet spot where it comes the strongest. “Stay...my...Onaga…” He laps once at her skin and then falls asleep against her chest. 

**Author's Note:**

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